What I wish I would have known when I was struggling and reading books about "mindful eating":
- Slowing down isn't a tool to make you eat less. It's a tool to notice what's happening.
- No amount of mindful eating is going to make eating less than you actually need serve you.
- Mindful eating doesn't have to be precious. You can eat in front of your favorite show. You don't have to be deeply meditative about it...it's really just in the case of compulsive or binge eating that removing distractions can be a useful tool.
- If you're absolutely desperate to change your body, attempts at mindful eating are probably still just going to be attempts at control.
- Mindful eating isn't just about the "mind". It's an embodied experience. It's not about an idea of how much you SHOULD eat, it's about getting to know your actual body.
- "Embodying a binge" really does mean "embodying a binge". What does a binge urge feel like in your body? What changes as you start to eat? What does the food actually taste like? What's it like to have this food take up space in your body? If shame comes up, what does THAT feel like? What's it like to breathe into it rather than let it spin stories in your head? What happens in your body if you don't immediately distract yourself after a binge? If you don't plan to starve yourself the next day? Can you get to know those feelings?
Binge eating taught me so much. Rather, EMBODYING the experience that I'd been fighting with for 15+ years taught me so much.
As it became safe to embody the entire experience of a binge, it started loosening it's hold.
It also became safe to change things from the inside of that experience.
I learned I could stop shaming myself and "starting over" when the binge was over.
I learned I was actually capable of stopping somewhere in the middle rather than being all-or-nothing.
Eventually I learned that a binge urge (the survival energy driving me to eat) wouldn't kill me if I didn't follow through. Or if I did so in a less checked-out way.
Basically I learned that I was lovable and safe, even in a pattern that felt like the worst thing about me.
And creating that kind of safety opened up room for other hidden parts of me to come to the surface. Embodying the binge was just the beginning.
P.S. I have a couple of spots for private clients and all clients get lifetime access to Free Spirit Academy courses (including Binge Freedom) DM me with questions, book a 15-minute call, or fill out the application through the link below ❤️
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