Arsenio's ESL Podcast: International Guest Speaker - Camka of Switzerland

Finally, after a second try (and failing the first time), both Camka and I rocked the house with this one!  Straight out of Switzerland, Camka's mother and society taught her to just "read between the lines" rather than chasing her uniqueness.  It wasn't until she headed to South Korea on an exchange program where she learned about her true-self and unique capabilities.  Outside the norm, she started blogging, YouTubing, and completely immersed herself.  You won't want to miss this. Tune in!

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/arseniosesllearning

Podcast on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/7hdzplWx6xB8mhwDJYiP6f?si=5vUca3p2QGuWPZbhzCRwBw

Podcast on FM: https://player.fm/series/2288534

Podcast on TuneIn:  https://tunein.com/podcasts/Language-Learning-Podcasts/Arsenios-ESL-p1117391/

Podcast on ListenNote: https://www.listennotes.com/c/778cf3cfd2564ba5b01f693bfebc96de/arsenio-s-esl-podcast/

Podcast on CastBox: https://castbox.fm/channel/Arsenio's-ESL-Podcast-id1251433?country=us

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Arseniobuck/?ref=bookmarks

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCIzp4EdbJVMhhSnq_0u4ntA

Website: https://thearseniobuckshow.com/

Q & A: ArsenioBuck@icloud.com

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/arsenio-buck-9692a6119/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thearseniobuckshow/?hl=en

Buzz sprout: https://www.buzzsprout.com/165390

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Who cares about me. It's about this wonderful individual. As a matter of fact, this is round two. I'm going to just go on this because this is a, it was a god damn shame how this went last time, but the champion and I, we are back and we are delivering a message for everyone out there. Now before I get into this, I'm going to give the introduction as I did last time champion. Little did she know. She helped me with the limiting belief that had been clinging onto for a very long time. It's kind of like champion was that push she had. She had the power of like 10 men in her hands and she went boom, right there on my chest. It allowed me to get over probably one of the longest standing limited beliefs I've had to this day. So without further ado, guys champion right out of Switzerland. Thank you so much for coming on.

Speaker 2: 1:01

Thank you so much for having me. I get, I didn't know that I made such a huge impact on you.

Speaker 1: 1:08

That's the same way we took it last. You know what I mean? Yeah, man. I just saw him again having you on motivational mentors and again doing this podcast and you know, just trying to get the 200 countries around the world onto my podcast, uh, to just destroy all borders that actually exist is something of, you know, of an achievement that I'm just trying to achieve. So, um, again, you are the very first, first, you're probably the second or third person I've ever met from Switzerland, so what that would that be? It said champion, introduce yourself, tell everybody what you're doing and all that good stuff.

Speaker 2: 1:45

All right. So yeah, I'm[inaudible], I'm from Switzerland, Zurich in particular. Um, and I'm not surprised that you'd have it with that many people because there's not that many of us. Um, yeah, I am a eagle mindset coach, which is why was on your podcast. I asked on the other one and I have people overcoming limiting beliefs like I apparently helped you to um, mostly beliefs that are somehow centered around the ego, around caring too much with other people. Think about you, about these kinds of things that hold you back in life quite a bit because we're all always worried about other people's eyes on us, other people's opinions on us and these kinds of things, which don't matter at all. Like in a big picture when you looked at it really doesn't matter. And I overcame this myself a couple of years ago, um, to the point where it's like zero. Like there's 0% of me that cares about someone else's opinion on me and I have my tactics and things that worked out for me. So that's why I help people with and I hope to achieve a world with like less ego and much more purpose because I think that's what we need. Just like how you're trying to achieve less borders. I know. Just destroy all the borders. There's no such thing. All of them do whatever communities there are, take it all away. I'm doing away with all. Yeah. Great. So, wow. You know what, I'm the purpose and we're going to take this on a different route, you know, compared to was last time. Um, and I want to focus a little bit on like people achieving their purpose. So of course you being in this school system, you telling me about a couple of things, we'll get into the language thing if we get the opportunity to, but I'm just going to take this on another venture because I just don't want to repeat myself. But like with people's Egos and purpose now, do people not want to fulfill their purpose to go after their purpose because their ego or their style, you know, they're stubborn or what is it exactly like if you, even if you talk about purpose in the education system, you know, Luke and I, we were just speaking to a guy last night as a matter of fact. And this guy, by all means amazing guy, however he is in university and it's great because he was getting ready to go into accounting as what the world expects him to do, um, focus. And he went after entrepreneurship. The lady who of course was in the gen x category, was in disbelief. She said, you're literally just going to throw away this opportunity. He said, I'm going to follow my purpose. So when it comes to purpose and especially out there in Switzerland with the education system preach, I honestly want to say the educational system, I will push down there. You don't get a way to do it. And that's the same way for everyone to no, like I think it's part of why we have such a hard time figuring out what it is. First of all, our purpose a what we're best at, what we, because you know you get like said, yeah, you have the first subjects. It's a set of like say, I don't know, I had 16 but let's say have 10 subjects at school. My purpose might be somewhere completely out of what I'm good at could be somewhere completely out. Oh, the school system. And it sort of pushes you into it. Like finding your place within the boundaries of the system. Exactly. So you're still feel like you are serving a[inaudible], you appear there, you go there every day, you would do something, but you're not fulfilling your purpose, you're fulfilling a purpose. Right. Um, so I feel like the waste is cool is right now, and the opposites different everywhere, but some of some things are the same. Um, they don't allow you to find your purpose within. Okay. And I think this also something that I feel like parents would be, it will be great if they would be pushing it because like I've been in school with a lot of people who had thousands of hobbies that were supported by their parents and these kinds of things while I was just pushed to do school well. Right. And somehow those people, same peppier they did better. They discovered other things that they were good at. And um, I feel like it would be a,

Speaker 1: 6:34

yeah.

Speaker 2: 6:36

Tests that I can, don't know. Maybe the parents could do, but like, we should maybe try and find that in school as well. I don't know how, I don't even want to go there. This is not what I do. But yeah, and I feel like that is also something that just, yeah, make this even worse and then it comes to equal. Like there comes to peer pressure that what do my friends think of me? What do my parents think of? Where do my teachers think of me? What do I look like? I'm on Instagram. I don't know. These kinds of things that then come on top of all of that. So even you're even less free to explore all the possibilities. Like you just see like, oh these people are doing this, could I do this as well and not, I'm good at this, this and this. What can I do with them? Like what can I make from it? And yeah, I feel like if it just somehow shut down all those voices, we will be able to find our own purpose. And I feel like that is the best way you can provide value in this whole world. Like, if you do what you're best at, did the best of your abilities and focus like on doing that, that is how you put the most value into the world and not just focused on like, okay, how will I be liked best? How will I be, you know, have the most subscribers and these kinds of things. So yeah, there's a lot of, I think I'm rambling, right?

Speaker 1: 8:03

That was a big question. There was no, oh right. Absolutely. Absolutely. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was just some big question. You could have taken it anywhere you went. So you went[inaudible] you go, where do you want to take it? Exactly. So you went down this hallway over here, so I'm gonna follow you down this hallway. So when it came to your household influences, how were your parents in terms of you making the decisions and where you are rebellion going from like high school into university if I'm not mistaken.

Speaker 2: 8:35

Yes, I was, I went to my, um, yeah, uh, no, that was not a, um, I, I thankful once was huge and I was not a rebel at all. Um,

Speaker 1: 8:51

yeah,

Speaker 2: 8:51

I was just doing what they told me to do mostly. And is that, it sounds like much more restricted than it is. Like I still had hobbies and stuff and stuff that I did, but it was just like I have to do well in school. That's it. That's how I will be liked by my parents. I have, I literally, this is, those were the thought processes that is something they value. So if I do well there, um, you know, I will be Phileo, I will be loved by them. I will be appreciated, valued I guess. Um, so I did well in school. I was always one of the best, like for someone who hated school as much as I did, it's a surprise that how good I was. And um, and that's also the thing, like they will always, people who like hate school, but they were also really bad at it. Right? You go there and people tell you you're not good enough for this. So develop was not my case. I was, I was really good. The teachers loved me, everyone loved me. I had great friends, everything was fine. But just, hey, that's cool because it was suppressing something that I could not, like, I couldn't lie that out anywhere because I can do that from my parents. My mother parents isn't, I don't have, that is not an a picture like me like me. No, no, but like saying the word parents was just sounds weird. Like it was my mom. Um, and yeah, it's just like I want it to be the person for her that she wanted me to be because it was my mom. I looked up to her, she was the leading force. Um, so I like it really. But, and obviously when you're in this message, it just suppressed. You don't really know. But this is what's happening. Like if I knew if I was outside, like seeing myself doing these things, none of it for myself, none of it for a purpose, none of it with a goal in mind, I think I would have stopped, but I didn't know that. Like I was just doing what I was supposed to do and go on. And to the point where I went to university with no clue what I was doing. I had no idea what I wanted out of it, um, two years and I didn't know what I wanted out of it. And that's why I realized like, okay, this is not going anywhere. I don't have one job that comes to mind that I would love to do with, you know, my degree with whatever, like pursue it any further. Um, and that was about the time where I decided, all right, I'm just going to finish this because university is expensive. My mother put money into this. I'm already like halfway through more than halfway. Um, so I'll do this and then that's it. No masters degree, no nothing. Like I'm done. I'm just going to go do my own thing. And it took me like I was 23, like that's, that's how long it took me to get to this point. Yeah. And then I went to Korea. We go, you didn't

Speaker 1: 11:53

tell me last five while we were chatting. What the Hell is going on here? Okay, so y'all went to, I got some Korean shout out to my Korean friends out there. Shout out to my Korean friends, Korean friends to the entire nation of Korea. Yes. So you went to Korean talk to me. Was this like, yeah, no, no, it was,

Speaker 2: 12:18

I almost did decided like uni doesn't matter that much. Like however it ends, as long as I get that degree for show, I will, I'll be fine. Um, but I had some, like I actually finished all my classes. I just had to write papers, but I still had to be enrolled in uni. Right. Um, it's, it's, it's weird how it works. Like one semester you do the course and then the other semester you do, um, you write the papers and do these kinds of things. Um, so for that one semester I would have been enrolled in uni, but I wouldn't have to appear there. Like, I wouldn't have to show up and I just didn't want to be around the people that I was around that time, like including my family and like all their pressure and all these things. I was just like, you know what? I'm not doing an exchange semester. Wow. No. Went to Korea. Okay. Keep going. Thing and exchange. Like, because I don't really care. I don't have know. I don't have to do any classes. I still did them because otherwise I couldn't do the exchange, like within our points system, way over like 24 points more than I needed to graduate, which is a lot because you, you get like four points for whole semester. Wow. Um, so I was just like, you know, I don't need any points, anything. I don't have to be here, but I can grab this chance because, you know, you'll get, um, um, scholarship and all that. It's my chance to go somewhere else or like just be away from them and see what I can do on my own. Um, so I went to Korea and discovered that I, well, it's good at a lot of things. Um, that I previously didn't know. Um, yeah, I also got really into, into the idea of starting my own business and doing my own thing. And I don't think it was Korea as a country. It was me being away from

Speaker 1: 14:16

Yup. Yup. Exactly.

Speaker 2: 14:19

Exactly, exactly. Like I love Korea and all that, but I don't think I, nobody's there. Like I didn't meet entrepreneurs and stuff like that, you know, I was just in uni anyway. Um, but yeah, that's like, that's where I started the idea of doing my own thing and yeah, a couple of years later here we are with a business.

Speaker 1: 14:40

Okay. So what were some of the things that um, I don't know that some, some of the talents, that uniqueness that you started figuring out that you didn't even know you had, what were some of those things?

Speaker 2: 14:51

Yeah, weirdly enough, even though I started English, how did they not realize? Sorry, you study English in Korea? Oh No, I sounded English here, but you know that, like I said, I think speaking with Florida and studied it and I did enroll there with my English degree, but I took different classes and that's also something that really helped. I took my classes on media, I took classes on PR, business stuff. Um, I just got so many different ideas because I didn't have to take an English. As I explained to you right now, I was done with my studies. Technically I just got there because I was enrolled still. Um, so I took like all those different classes, which wouldn't count towards my degree because I don't need it. So I was like, I had to all the freedom to explore. I just had to take like two or so English classes just for, you know, just to make it work. Like this tip to make the system be okay with me being there. Um, I know, so I've a lot of those influences, like just hearing these different things, how business works, how that and that, how different companies achieve this and that. And even though I took an English, you know, I took English to study and like that was my degree, my major. I never realized how good I was at writing until I started doing it for myself until I started. Like I started a blog and stuff like that. It doesn't exist anymore. So I wouldn't know. But that was a thing I was writing for myself. I started a blog about music and stuff. I just wanted to write about anything and I was good. People liked it. People complimented me like these kinds of things. Before that I was just writing the way they wanted me to write a paper. Right, exactly. You have your thesis statement, you have your Duh, Duh. I'm first paragraph, second. I was just a bridge when I hear that too. And it's like, it's like, and now I cringe. But there was just like this how you react. That's how you do it and you hate it, but you still do it. And I don't hate writing. It's like the most, it's my most natural thing. That's like the thing I love to do the most. Um, apparently, which I discovered later after, you know, uh, university sucked all my talents. I don't know, it was like really, I was just like, oh, it's just really, um, discovering those things like writing then that I actually get in front of a camera. I started a youtube channel in Korea as well. I started a lot of things. I was just like, do it all, do it all and you'll figure out what you're good at. And nobody knew me there, so I didn't feel like, you know, I didn't feel bad walking around with the camera. I didn't feel bad, you know, writing stuff and publishing it because I didn't know anyone. I went there on my own and I did, you know, meet people, but then they met the new me,

Speaker 1: 17:50

me that I wanted to be, not the one that, you know, my family created at the school created. Um, and that helped as well because if you then get appreciated for, you know, being yourself, the confidence groves man, absolutely. If you put yourself out there, there's people appreciate it, which there always will be like, you know, we're so scared of that, but there always will be like any wishes of you, someone will like, um, what's your best with, you know, being just yourself because then you don't have to pretend, you know, and don't be liked for that too. And that's something that I discovered there too. Um, yeah. Yeah. Korea was like, you know, the changed my life, man, that is just brilliant. You know what you said something university sucking my talents added of me. And you know what? There are a lot of people cause man, I got a worldwide listening group, you know what I mean? Egypt, Libya, India, um, I'm saying these countries and of course China, I'm saying these just because, and respectfully because they're actually put into a box too. And I think they have that uniqueness within them that if they just get the opportunity to start seeking outside that box, they're going to be in that same situation as you, you know, just discovering who you truly are. You know what I mean? So all my God. And then that went from the blog to youtube channel. You being out there in Korea. Um, how about the cultural barrier aspect? Was there are, you know, because you saying to yourself, okay, I don't necessarily have an image here. I don't have to people please or do this or do that because I'm no longer in Switzerland. I'm going to be the whoever the hell I am now. This is how great Thailand is for me because I'm like, okay, they put me in a box, whatever this box is called, but you know what I could do and act and speak up. Now I'm not acting crazy just running around the streets naked. No, no. I'm, you know, I'm still[inaudible] they shoot by as you know, that, you know, within the lines of whatnot. But me being myself, Thailand has enabled me to do that. I was a set, I was just like you when you were in Switzerland. So how about Korea? Were there some things that you were like, damn, boom, you learned some things while you were out there? Um, honestly, the thing that was weirdly enough, a emancipated me a little bit or like help me, um, oh, how do I put it empowered me even more? Was that just by the way I look, I'm already different. Yeah. And you know, Korea has like 3% or so foreigners like, hmm. Hmm. Not, oh,

Speaker 2: 20:48

you know, yeah. I wasn't a a university setting. So they were more foreigners say because a lot of exchange students, that kind of thing. Um, but even there were like huge minority. I already look different people already look at me. So I think nothing to lose. Like I was so empowering to be there in the position. Like where no matter what I do, I'm different. Okay. I might as well just, you know, do myself. And the other thing is, it's just like Korea for me still now feels more like home than here. And I go back every year. I would just like, I love so, so much. It's such a beautiful place. And the culture, I just liked the culture also was very empowering in the sense to work for yourself. Um, I feel like there was a lot of, I met a lot of people, um, and like outside of this whole online business kind of setting, just people working on mark as like really working hard that the students mindsets over there. Like just like you working, working, working for yourself for something like putting in the work. And um, a lot of people told me like this one sentence that I still carry with me. Um, and I was like, effort is a friend that will never betray me. Oh, that was like the kind of mindsets that they were in there. A lot of people I met, they like Korean people I met were in and I'm just like, alright, like we have this thing like, oh, I worked eight hours, I've gotta relax now this is Switzerland. So it's is really like, oh no, I, you know, that gets slow. Let's sit down. I can't work more than, I don't know, 40 hours a week. I can't do this from us. I don't have the time. I have a full time job, you know, stuff like that. Like people here are snowflakes. Like, this is the country of snowflakes. I tell you, Korea, that snowflake out of me, it melts at the snowflake. I became a puddle. I was just like, oh, right, if I want this, I got a foot in the work like these people do and these kinds of things. So that helped me as well. And like just the general culture, I just loved everything about it. It was so fun and loud and colorful and the friends, it's different. Um, yeah, I felt at home I liked it.

Speaker 3: 23:07

The people were very well, a very warm and you know, were they very helpful or they just do they own thing and you do your own. Yeah,

Speaker 2: 23:14

yeah. Like that. The thing is with Korea, the culture is very, uh, you know, whom you know, and it's really hard to get to know other people. Um, yeah, it's usually like your friend introduces you to a friend and Dah, Dah, Dah, and that's how you kind of get into this. But at the same time it's also not a, you know, single person country. Like there's always couples around like eating food. Just the way food is, like you have this big bowl in the middle and everyone is eight, like it's always a, um, how should I put like, community is really strong, but then also if you're alone, it's real hard to get into it. Um, so it was a bit weird, but like for most, I, I liked the idea of being, you know, left. Oh, that's the loan when I wanted it to be. Like if I go out on the street, people are not going to talk to me. No one's going to bother me. Um, this is something like when I was in France that I experienced, like I would never be able to live in France. I could not sit down without someone coming and approaching me on like, I don't know what it was. I was there for a week and it was horrible. I was, and it's not no shade there. No nothing, nothing. Vance wrench people general. Yeah. No offense. I don't know anyone. I don't know anyone either. But like, no offense there, but like, it was just not for me. You know, when you're someone who you just, you know, it's not them, it's me not working out with them. It's like I just want to sit down and eat and there will be someone like, oh, you're alone. I'll join you. And I'm just wow. Eat with me. Just a guy who ran, sorry, I'm freaking out. Like it makes me, it makes your crazy, it's crazy. We, it's a random guy. Okay. If you do that in any country, that is weird as hell. You do that in America. She's like, oh my God, soccer. You know what? Yeah, that's just gonna make a youtube channel about my story with my soul. No, but maybe I just had a really extreme experience, but, but I was there for like seven days and it's happened at least four to five times. I, someone just came up to me until, and it's fine. Usually I mentioned a lot of people would love that kind of thing. It would be like, oh my God, everyone here is so, but I don't like, I like this, the coldness part that I experienced when I was in Korea. That's, you know, if I don't, no, if I don't want to be talked to, I won't be told to. If I just sit here on my own, nobody's going to join my table. Even if there's like six seats on the table and I'm alone, they're to go to another table. Right. Um, but then again, if I wanted to meet people was a bit hard[inaudible] that university health because there were already people there I just talked to because I'm in class. Yeah. Oh my God. And I love it. I love it. This is what this podcast is about. Like someone from Switzerland going to Korea and giving me an entire new perspective on an entire country because man, the things I've heard like, you know, in terms of people going here, this and that, I mean it's just that unwitnessed not very welcoming. However, a lot of my Thai students, they, they have a tendency of going there and every time I asked him, students, hey,

Speaker 1: 26:44

where have you been? Japan and Korea, where have you been? Japan, Korea, where have you been to Korea? And I'm like, okay guys, what is going on? Why do you keep going there? It must be something you really love about that place. So yeah.

Speaker 2: 26:55

Yeah. So I just loved like, I love the vibe about it the most. And I don't know if it's every, you know, 50 there, I've uploaded this. So, um, but there's just a spike. There's, Oh, it's always alive. Like no matter what time it is, I go out, I, you know, I get my coffee at 4:00 AM that's right. Like not here. If it's Sunday, if I go out, it's just going to be like literally nothing. I'm looking out of the window. There's like one person walking around on the street. That's just how it is. Like some days are dead over here and like there, I could go out on a Sunday and everything is open, everything is fine. Like any other day all the time. And like this is just something that obviously that's not just Korea, that's not just, so there's a lot of cities like that. Um, but it was one thing that really stuck to me, like to the extent where everything was open at Oh, at all times. And I could just send ob myself, even my own inner cook, I could just be myself. Right. Because here I have to. Yeah. And you know, if don't be like up at eight and you're back home at six, like you're kind of missing out on, on the events that are happening between the, like nothing happens outside of those hours except like, you know, going out with and clubbing and stuff like that. But that's not me. Right.

Speaker 1: 28:14

Oh my God. And that's why going back to a place like America or live in La, this is why I think it's amazing where a lot of people, I know, I have a lot of people out there that live in, you know, remote towns and you know, you're, if I live in a neighborhood, whereas there I get excited when a car drives down the street. That is a very sad, you know what I mean? Like I've seen this in movies and it makes me cringe because God damn Arizona has a lot of that in like Arizona city. I'm like, what is this out here? This is, this is bad, bad. And so your face. Yeah, go ahead.

Speaker 2: 28:56

Yeah, that's the thing, like it's bad for you, right? I can't imagine that a lot of people would love it. Like my grandma would love it. Like never hear a car. No sirens. No, I don't know loud people drinking outside, stuff like that. They would love I would, I go crazy in that kind of setting. I like, I need the city, I need the buzz. Right?

Speaker 1: 29:20

Oh my God. Okay. So the last thing I'm gonna talk about here is hey, if you have the ability to learn English very quickly and also Switzerland is a concoction of so many different languages. So I first want you to talk about what languages do you speak at you, you're literally like 20 minutes from every border and then not really almost, you're not that far off. 27 or city. It's only seven. And of course, how did you learn English so quick? Cause I know Thai people who have been studying English for 18 2030 25 303540455055 years. And they still speak at, I mean just a, I'll be going into the elementary level. So yeah, go ahead.

Speaker 2: 30:17

Yeah, talk to you about this. Indeed. The podcast that never happened. Failed. I started learning English at the age of around 12, 13, 14. I learned that and I started in school. So before that I didn't speak a word. I don't think I made all those. Just say hello empties kinds of things and curse words and yes, of course everyone knows shit. But yeah, it didn't know any English before. I couldn't form sentences the way I do right now. Um, so I started at school and yeah, that's basically where I started learning properly, learn in English and I wasn't exposed to it in any other way. Like my family doesn't speak English. I don't have friends from English countries or English speaking countries. Um, Aye. It wasn't that. But what's helped me the most, and we've talked about this in more detail, so you, if you want to go there, please ask. And was definitely the culture, um, pop culture influence that happened, that, that I was very, very into that as very absorbed with and I am was wearing to dancing and you know, making music back then I would still be into it. But like those talents were stuck there. Um, and that's something like if you do know how to dance for 20 years, you will know that, you know, no, it's not like, you know, riding a bike. So, but those were the influences like pop culture, um, music, especially these kinds of things that were in English originally. So if I, you know, not everything was translated, obviously it shows on TV would be German. Um, but if I wanted to watch something that is not on TV and especially when the Internet came up and youtube and these kinds of things, I had to speak English. Like subtitles were also not a big deal back then. Like right now how, you know, people sub every video on youtube. That was not a thing a couple of years ago, right when I was learning English. So if I didn't speak English, I didn't understand them. And so my desire to understand these kinds of things grew exponentially. Like the more I got absorbed into the pop culture, I'm into culture in general, that just happens to be in English. The more I wanted to learn it, then I think that willingness or like this did this puration to learn. It was just so great. That just happened really quickly. When you want to learn something, um oh you see a huge purpose in learning it. And for me that was a big deal. Like learning English was something that just had to happen for me because otherwise I wouldn't be able to participate in these kinds of things that were so close to my heart. Um, it was just, yeah, there was a huge, I saw the purpose behind learning English more than French and other subjects that I never figured out. So yeah, that was that I think like the influence of their pop cultural influence on me personally was huge. And it's why, how it like really, really happened so fast and in such a, I feel like, you know, on a high level I feel like I don't form any sentences that you would, you know, consider a completely wrong or like why this is a foreigner. Like she doesn't speak English at all. Like if I write, I arrived like someone whose first language is English, um, which is, you know, within 10 years it's a, it does a lot of time. 10 years is a lot of time to master a language, right? Like run out. It's much easier for me than even Germans and even any other of the other first language is a second, third languages that I learned before I started learning English. So you surrounded yourself English, it wasn't the academics in the school per se that helped you out. Rec. See, there it is. They helped. Of course they helped. Like they, they weren't there with like the grammar, like the basics and all of that. The, they created the base for it. But I built up most of it. I feel, um, through engaging with it through listening to, you know, native speak to pop culture, these kinds of things to wanting to understand it because like you also learned like very formal English and, um, school like you've done learn to speak the way we talk to each other right now and like the slang and these kinds of things to understand all this. That like, that's what you learned from culture. That's what you learn from being out there, speaking English, English speaking folks. Uh, but also just hearing it all the time, like I, you know, and okay. Absorbing these kinds of like terms that you would never hear in, in, in a school setting. Um, so of course like the, the feeling for English like this, you know, you have to have like kind of grasp for language, like as something that is not learning, like something that is not just here. Um, that's definitely didn't come from school like that, no such thing. But they did create the base, like the grammar and these kinds of things. I'll visit that help. I won't be like, oh no school then anything from my English because of course it did. Oh

Speaker 1: 35:38

Wow. Okay man. Oh Man. Oh Man. So yeah, of course we already went down that road. But you know what, I know a lot of people were probably interested in terms of, you know, you're speaking very, very good English and English not being your mother tongue. So what is your mother

Speaker 2: 35:52

tell me again? The first language I ever learned was Bosnian because we're from the uh, my mother originally from Bosnia. Um, but then German right away. Like I, I still don't speak personnel perfectly because I was really young when I started learning it and as soon as I got in school and I met friends and Dah, Dah in Switzerland, German became the, but that first line, like it's not the first, but it does my, I would say my mother tongue and my first language to want that. I explored the long list and in the most sincere way. Um, and yeah, then we started learning French. Um, I started learning French away cause you have to do it in school. I was like, let me start over because um, you know, almost half of the country speaks French and so it's mandatory in school. And what did I learn? I always learned Korean and I learned Chinese because I was like, that's also something I did an internship in China because I didn't want to go back to Europe after Korea.

Speaker 1: 36:57

Oh my God. That could have been another one we could have dove into. I should have asked you about. Where else have you been?

Speaker 2: 37:04

That was a whole, like China is like, I never learned Chinese properly. It was just like picking up everything because I lived in Beijing where no one else speaks English except for like literally nobody speaks English. Um, especially not where I lived. I'd go visit, there's a foreigner areas like a four in their area, but then also other foreigner areas. Um, I lived in a complex building and I was the only white person there and no one spoke, you know, and I, if I want to go to the shop and buy something or ask a question, ask for a bag or something like that, I would have to do it in Chinese because otherwise, like if I was there for three months and I could literally communicate with people, I couldn't reach it. Like I still don't know what the, they signs me. That's fine. Right. But I could talk right. I could like form normal sentences, ask for things as well. Nope. Four Mo, um, education there at all. Like not one lesson of Chinese. I was able to speak. Um, I didn't pursue it any further, sadly, so it's all gone, but my Korean is still there. SORTA.

Speaker 1: 38:14

Okay. So say hello in Bosnian.

Speaker 2: 38:18

Hello? They say hello. Hello? Hello? Is that what they say? And Bob, I mean, if it wants to say hello, hello? You can say[inaudible], which is like three things. Okay. A German fellow. Um,

Speaker 1: 38:34

I always say hello. Hello in every language

Speaker 2: 38:37

is so weird. Okay. Hi, big gates. Big Gates. Okay. Okay. All right. How are you a, see how are you in Korean? I'd say don't ask that. I know that usually they would ask like, you know, what's her name? Or like how old are you? So it would be like, what's her name? Oh my God, that was be high in Korean. That's the one that is not, hello. At least of, what is it? I know how to say, Oh, I say, oh I still long for, but like if we're friends, I would just say young, I'm yawn. I know. Let's just say, I don't know how to say, Oh, if you just meet someone for the first time or if you go into a shop or stuff like that. Okay.[inaudible] got a little bit of French.[inaudible] actually speaks French and I'm like, see this? Yeah, it's crazy. And so every time she comes in I, so like I was just like, what's the informal? Yeah. Oh yes, I just survived the, yeah, cause like, yeah, we don't say[inaudible], we just say Ennis. Exactly. It is. We will need that. Right. We don't say that there's two forms that that's the same. This the same in France. Like if you just speak to people like that, as we said, wished French doesn't like France. French people don't have boundaries. Right. So it's a very informal, usually on the street, most of the, like French is such a slang language. That's the worst. That's the hardest for me when like French people come and speak to me, they use all that language. I never learned because I learned it in school, French that is, and I never engaged much more outside of school. So that's like I don't understand and I'm just like, I have no idea what your guys' saying. Even though I do understand French, I can't understand shit. That's horrible. I could, that's the thing like that shows like how cool language learning is like differs from learning it out there like in the world. Speaking to people, listening, engaging with the language, otherwise. Wow. Yeah. Oh, then awesome. You know a bed. Thank you so much. Before you, before we go, especially with everything you've learned, go into Korea, go into China. What are three big takeaways you want the listeners to take away from this conversation? For All ESL learners out there or just people

Speaker 1: 41:34

wanting to get the hell out of the box? We're going to label this escape the buff.

Speaker 2: 41:39

Escape the box. All right. Um, let me just like a language thing. The takeaway is do engage with people who speak that language in any way you can. It doesn't have to be speaking to like if you're shy and introverted, it's fine. You can, you can watch films, you can read books, you can do other things like just, you know, um, that is the fastest way to learning a language out of the box. Like, yes, just talk, worrying what other people think of you. You're not living their life, who are living your own life. Like really, if you will never be happy living for someone else and you will never be liked by anyone and by everyone, you know, if you try like this just is not going to happen. Just you might as well just be you and there will be, I promise it will be. People will love you the way you are and you will be happy. They will be happy. You will find someone who is like, you know, actually in your lane and not to just liking you for something you're putting out there does not you. Um, so that's really escaping the bucks and like really don't let anyone, not your parents, not uni tell you what you're gonna do in life because man, we only get one as far as I know, like I've never met someone who like proved to me that we're going to get a second life or so you'll get to do what you got to do about it. Right. You have to live it for yourself. You have to make yourself happy first and everything else comes second and nobody else should be, you know, in a position to dictate how you live your life. No matter how crazy or ids I go for them, you can't blues, I kind of lose in life. Like that's the thing. If you can fail in school, like you can't fail in life. We've talked about that in the other podcasts.

Speaker 1: 43:25

Yeah. Yeah, we did too. That was a really good one to talk about, but yeah, yeah. By the way,

Speaker 2: 43:32

those, I think those were three takeaways, but I have a question. Like what was the mindset shift that I held?

Speaker 1: 43:40

[inaudible] is the limiting belief was I always thought about what other people, we're probably thinking of me through their facial expressions. So by seeing someone's face, I automatically assume she gave me a dirty look, therefore she's a racist. Rather than saying to myself, maybe it's my inner self that's reflecting that facial expression and that's how she's emanating that look towards me. You know? And so when you said that, I still remember there was like a joke within my soul. You were like, so many people give a damn about what other people might be thinking about them. Now, Jason Silver said this three years ago, and it hit me, but when you said it, it was a re reaffirming and boom. And it was like just, it was like a bullseye, you know what I mean? And I said, Oh my God, I think I this now and for the next two to three weeks until I went into, you know, the little thing again, then I stepped out of it. I can snap out of it real quickly cause things, but the triggers are kind of like seeing Andre the giant look alike, just the a deformed human being, no offense, but walk you with this beautiful Thai girl. And I'm like, ah, I get all angry. You know what I mean? I get super say like I'm more handsome, you know what I mean? And so that was one of the ultimate limited beliefs that I had created because the environment, um, that I was in and what I was reflecting inner like in the inside, outward, you know? So, um, yeah, when you said that I understood a hell of a lot. Yeah.

Speaker 2: 45:12

Oh, this, that's one thing that everyone has, right? Right. People never think about you as much as to think that they think about you.

Speaker 1: 45:19

Boom. And that's it, right? Yeah.

Speaker 2: 45:21

Yeah. It's just like we all think about ourselves first. That's just how it is. And it's not selfish. It's normal, but will happens around me, not the wrong

Speaker 1: 45:29

yeah for me here. No, exactly. Exactly. So that, that right there, the shift that makes me so happy to hear that that's like, it's reached you in a way that way. That was the short podcast too. But with those, what is it and what, what was that like? A week later we finally got the premium and whatnot, but uh, yeah, we're going to have to bring you back on it again for everyone out. Some really awesome videos on uh, Instagram and you have some Instagram TV. If people who are interested in what you got going on and everything that you have and whatnot, how can they get in touch with you? And I'll be sure to put all the links in the description on youtube, podcasts, wordpress, all that good stuff.

Speaker 2: 46:16

I, I make it very simple for everyone. Just go on Instagram if you want to find me anywhere else. There's the link in the bio and I have all the links, like all the other links are in there where you can find me, my website, Facebook, all that stuff. Um, but it's the easiest to go on, I assume since we all have that anyway. And you're just type my name Tom Kosloff and it's my full name. I don't know if you're going to write it out somewhere, but, um, just go there and from there you can take like that's where I am the most as well. So if it wants to wreck me directly at DM is the fastest way to me. And other than debt, all the links are there.

Speaker 1: 46:54

Awesome man. Cham cause thank you so much. We have finally done it. You know what, this was a power 50 minute one. Um, and I love it cause we actually talked about some really, really interesting things, especially escape in the box. And I think that was probably the most pivotal for everyone out there in the what? 50 plus countries that listen to this podcast. So Champs. Oh Wow. Yeah, I know, I know, I know. You know what I mean? I just, I found in this market and I said, you know what, cause my youtube is kind of big like one video on youtube, it's like 11,000 views. And I was like, you know what, maybe I should make the ESL podcasts and I know people aren't going to do it like me. So let me, let me create it. And just like that, Japan, China, Taiwan, the Asian countries came on and then it started expanding to Africa like Mozambique and[inaudible] in South Tomi. I know. Shout Brazil, shout out to everyone who listens to this. And guys, if you find this of value, make sure that you share it with anyone. Please leave a review on the iTunes or whatever platform you listened to me on because this on a ridiculous amount of platforms that are third parties and stuff, which is great. And again, if you guys are interested in chapter you make sure you go over there and share any messages with her. Ask her anything. And again, champion. Thank you so, so much. No worries. Thank you for having me. You're very welcome. And guys, with that being said, have a wonderful morning, afternoon, and evening. I'm your crazy host. Start setting out. Stay tuned for more and more speakers are coming over and out.