First Cup of Coffee - March 1, 2024

On busy brain work, how I'm not yet done with the book, nice words from my editor on gatekeeping and letting people in, even nicer words from Maria Vale on NEVER THE ROSES, and the loneliness of caregiving.

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Transcript

00:01.89
jeffekennedy
Good morning, everyone this is Jeffe Kennedy author of epic fantasy romance I'm here with my first cup of coffee ah need that this morning. Today is say it with me people. It is Friday woo whoo March first 3 1 twenty four two months down of 2024 already how that happens I don't know. So yeah I as a tired today. Um, it's just it's been a week. Maybe I'm always like this finishing a book and I think I may say this every time but ah yeah I am tired. Ah I it is not done. First order of the fae realms is not done. It's not going to be done hear me out I have less than 5000 words to go I'm at over 75000 but yesterday I got very little done on it I kind of hit that grinding to a halt point. And I kind of know how it's gonna end but I have 2 major secrets that have not revealed themselves to me yet and I would just sometimes I think it would be great to be that person who just picks and says oh it's gonna be that it was this thing.

01:31.20
jeffekennedy
And that's just not how my process works and I know I sound like I'm arguing with you I feel like I've been arguing with people this week um there yeah I probably won't even go into that. Ah. Yeah, so it's just like I also get kind of cranky when I get at this phase of the book and it's like my my it's exactly what I've been writing. Ah so anyway I still have a couple of big reveals i'm. In these last 5000 words we should be denoument and it's not and I know that the reason for this is cut this sneeze. The reason for this is is because I need to fix the beginning. Um, you know so like I always give the advice easier said than done. To have the make sure the first 25% is solid and then the rest falls into line and what happened with this book because and I've talked about this already I won't go into it at infinitum. But. With this book I've started in stops so many times and it changed directions. So I know I have to fix the beginning this part of the whole thing with like the title change and now it's called the first order of the fa realms and we're not going to as many of the fa realms as I originally thought we were gonna go to.

03:00.60
jeffekennedy
And the stakes changed the stakes got revised and I've not yet revised them in the story. So yesterday I decided I've hit that point where I need to go back and revise from the beginning. So good news is I'm going back and starting my revision. Um I think there will be more added to the end by the time I get there because I just know I'm gonna be chopping some words from the beginning we will shel see how many get chopped. So I'm going to do that today I hope I'm feeling a little. Bring tired I have been um this week on the dog walk been listening to podcasts which yeah I think you all know that I'm like such a hypocrite I like do a podcast but don't listen to any. Ah but I've been listening to I love listening to Dan Savage's podcast.

03:58.69
jeffekennedy
Savage love ah, and apparently the way that I speak with my western drawl. Someone heard me say it as dead sandwich which I think would also be a great podcast title feel free to use that. But no Dan Savage um and I started Week last week not just this week but last week and one of the girls in my discord was saying that she thought she might have to give up podcasts because it was too much brizzy lib a bit busy brain work. That's not entirely easy to say and I'm wondering if that's some of it. Um I don't know she was using the example which I found really interesting so Deana shout out to you on this I don't know if I said anything at the time but that dog trainers say that to exercise your dog instead of. Focusing on taking them on a very brisk walk which is our impulse is to let them go leisurely and do lots of snipping because sniffing is busy brain work and it helps to expend energy for them and it comes back to this thing that I have. Been saying and sort of like my circular realization as I do discovering the same thing over and over again. Um that writing is exhausting. It is draining and and I still have this idea.

05:35.33
jeffekennedy
Probably from my irish and scottish ancestors my you know the miners and the farmers ah sharecroppers that only manual work is the tiring work. But now. Busy brain work is tiring so I'm hoping that as I revise the beginning I have several red herrings um things that I kind of threw in there because I thought they might play out something and also things that I thought I would get to that I'm not. I mean to be cutting a lot of that stuff out and hopefully the story will present itself I I think often of um I think it's Michelangelo who said that sculpting was a process of cutting away. Stone that was getting in the way of us seeing the image inside and that's what revising feels like 1 of my friends said to me I think just yesterday that field I was gonna say the other day but I think it was just yesterday um that she was when I said I was. This is what I was gonna do she said oh well, that's unusual for you because you write so clean. You know you have such ah, clean versions when you finish a book and that's true. But I always do at least 1 revision pass and this one has gotten a couple because of.

07:09.45
jeffekennedy
It's crooked path I have never ever ever written a book where I did not go back and revise my revisions go fast compared to some people I don't spend months on revision like people. Often accuse a 2 intuitive writers of having to do but it's definitely that it's now takes me a week or 2 and that's probably what this will take me I am going to go visit my mom in Tucson at the end of next week so I don't have a deadline for this revision. So. It's okay, it doesn't matter doesn't matter but I would like to get busy on reluctant wizard. And I will theoretically be getting line edits from allie back at some point I should tell you all did I already I did not and I know this because the email exchange happened after Monday's podcast this is the only reason that I know anything is by looking at dates. But um, but anyway um, Editor Ali at Tor who I know I've been like saying who she has all this time but now that the announcement's officially official I feel like I can be I don't know.

08:35.92
jeffekennedy
I want to say less guarded but I've been saying her name all all the time Ali Fisher executive Editor Tor who's just a really terrific editor I really like her so she emailed me because of course I put the show notes or the link to the show in my email signature. Um. Which I still think is a good idea but that I'm always surprised when people click on that. Ah yeah, it's a very funny thing doing this because maybe partly because I talk to my own face.

09:05.29
jeffekennedy
And even though you all send me nice comments and stuff I'm always kind of taken aback when somebody knows something that I said on the podcast. It's like oh there are people out there listening I I treasure you all I appreciate you listening and yet there's still some part of me I don't know maybe it's like the magic the magic of the screen it's like oh wow people are listening okay maybe I should watch my mouths but but every once while I have that belated idea that though maybe I should keep my mouth shut but I have bypassed many occasions to keep my mouth shut anyway, Ali that's an old joke I love that one. Think Ron White was the one who said it I heard that um so Allie replied on the email chain she said Jeffe I watched your coffee video I love that she called it. My coffee video. Cheers ah, and loved it. What a cool transparent helpful way to talk through deals. And this is of course in reference to Monday's podcast where I talk through what the publisher's marketplace announcement meant and I was so happy at first I was like as soon as I read I watched your coffee video was like oh I hope I was good. Ah if I didn't say anything I shouldn't say ah. And so I said I'm so happy you approve and I said I believe in mentoring and sharing information. So. It's great to hear you approve of what I said from the editorial side and she said I absolutely support. It. It's so important to let folks in and yeah, right? there.

10:40.76
jeffekennedy
And I'm so glad that Ali is someone who who thinks that um you know letting folks in banishing this idea that there are gatekeepers right? You know the the usual complaints about how. Traditional publishing works. So I thought that was lovely of her. Um, and then several of you pointed out that ah I neglected that what the thing I forgot on Monday was to read to Maria Vale's lovely blurb about never the roses I'm really working on calling it never the roses so that I can get my mouth accustomed to saying that instead of saying Oneira which the transcript hates that word anyway, act to fix it in all the places and I don't think I got them all anyway. Maria had asked to read it. Maria is lovely I love her book. She loves my books It's great. Friendship. We're rooming together at a polycon but Maria says of never the roses. Every time I think that the borders of fantasy cannot be stretched geoffie Kennedy proves me wrong. She has reimagined magic into the shape of a dream with all the terrible and limit limitless possibilities of a fairy talele.

12:07.97
jeffekennedy
But she has also remade enemies to lovers into something much more layered Oneira and Em are not enemies. They are terrifyingly powerful weapons bound to the warring rulers who wield them they have seen too much done too much. Leaving them uniquely suited to understanding the price of power and the wounds they both bear Maria is so good at writing those things and that's such a great encapsulation of what the story is about I adore it. Um, all right? So otherwise and I actually made a note. Um, and yeah I guess I will talk about it a little bit. Um I saw somebody put up on social media just a single line saying. Being a caregiver is lonely and I thought that was interesting because as many of you may or may not know I find myself in the role of a caregiver at this stage of my life. My husband of 33 years and that's gone fast too. Has parkinson's disease and you know people ask me how he is and I always say well progressive disease is progressive. You know so it's sort of like he doesn't get better There is no getting better It's only like gradually worse um and.

13:38.78
jeffekennedy
And I say to my friends sometimes that I don't always know how to answer that question. You know how? how do I answer that you know and and they are very compassionate and supportive of me and they say well you know we we want to hear the truth and we want to be you know, help you. Help you process or whatever and that's like yeah but you know there's like not that much to say but I was thinking about that you know is it lonely and and I've never felt like it's lonely and maybe it's because I am fortunate to have so many good and supportive people in my life. But. It is occasionally I'm surprised I'm getting emotional about this. We were David and I were talking about this in the car yesterday as I took him down for his doctor's appointment and I was just talking about being you know, tired having a lot going on and he said well. You know it's a lot It's a lot for you to take care of me.

14:42.49
jeffekennedy
I really did not mean to get weepy here probably should not have ventured into this on 2 of of a Friday morning. But um, it's interesting for me to evaluate that to step back and say because I don't feel like it's a lot it's it's not it's not like it's twenty four seven it's not like you know like I'm I'm not a nurse right? But you know I am the the primary breadwinner and I do almost all of the household stuff I do all the financial stuff. Um, and you know I said you know taking a step back from it that way. It is good to look at how much we take on and you know listening to savage love dead sandwich. Um you know and some of the people talking about. Like you know their male partners in particular, you know, like not helping with emotional labor stuff not helping with the housework and that kind of thing and you know well and many women choosing not to opt into marriage now because they don't want to have to be. Domestic help. They don't want to have to clean up after somebody else and I think that there's a loneliness to that too and you know talking with the gals in my discord about you know trying to balance that trying to balance.

16:15.70
jeffekennedy
Raising children and um, you know, taking care of the household and um, one gal was saying how she due to a scheduling snafu. You know like her. She's gonna be single parenting for the next two weekend and. So that means she won't get any writing done and you know I I think it can all be kind of Lonely. Um, being responsible for getting all the things done right? It can can be a lot so I didn't mean to delve into that a whole bunch. But I. Because my point really was is that I don't find caregiving ah per se lonely. Maybe I don't know Maybe what we're thinking about is you know trying to get all the things done right.

17:09.25
jeffekennedy
So um, I'm gonna sign up slightly early today because I have to go speak in getting things done I have to go get the oil changed in the cart. So um, yeah I wish me well on this revision and I will talk to you all on Monday I hope you all have a great weekend. Rejuvenating and well refilling that is my plan you all take care bye bye.