Chloé Caillet

Chloé Caillet's career has blown up expodentially in the last couple of years and now with her LGBTQ+ party series SMIILE currently touring the world, the DJ, producer, label owner and party starter sits down with Paul to reflect on her journey.

Growing up between Paris, New York and London, Chloé taps into her rock origins, unveiling her advocacy for Queer party values and talks about balancing the demanding rhythm of a music career with the essential practices of mindfulness, fitness, and therapy. The episode pulsates with Chloe's drive to remain authentic in an industry that constantly evolves, and her insights are a beacon for those navigating the frenetic world of music and self-discovery.

This week's episode isn't just about beats and basslines; it's an anthem to the spaces that music creates and the communities it builds. Our conversation dives into the symbiotic dance between DJing, production, and the influence of diverse musical spaces – from band nights in Paris to the ecstatic communion of raves. We revel in the shared energy that courses through genres, binding the likes of Andrew Weatherall with the unadulterated joy of discovery.

Chloé and Paul round off with a reflection on the scene's metamorphosis, the social fabric of past and present raves, and the how social media is altering underground culture. We share the electric buzz of creating inclusive, empowering spaces that resonate with authenticity, as evidenced by a transformative party in Los Angeles where barriers were joyfully dismantled.

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Transcript

PAUL: 0:01

lost in sound is sponsored by audio technica, and right now I'm wearing a pair of their athm 50 headphones. I love them. They fit great and snug. They're for the studio or out and about, like what I'm doing right now standing on a street corner in berlin. Audio technica are a global but still family-run company that make headphones, turntables, cartridges, microphones, studio quality yet affordable products, because they believe that high-quality audio should be accessible to all. So, wherever you are in the world, head on over to Audio-Technicacom to check out all of their range of stuff.

PAUL: 0:36

Thank you, hello and welcome to episode 127 of Lost in Sound. I'm Paul Hamford, I'm your host, I'm an author, a broadcaster and a lecturer, and Lost in Sound is the weekly podcast where I chat with an artist who works outside the box, from global icons to trailblazing outsiders and emerging innovators. We talk music, creativity and perhaps that most daunting part of being an artist the praxis of life. Previous guests have included Peaches, suzanne Chiani, jim O'Rourke, chili Gonzalez, cozy, funny Tootie, jean-michel Jarre, mickey Blanco and Thurston Moore, and today you're about to hear a chat I had with producer, dj, label owner and party starter Chloe Kaye. Meanwhile, my book Coming to Berlin is still available in all good bookshops or via the publisher's website, velocity Press. Go on, treat yourself to it if you've not got it already. Summer's coming up, beach, beach reads, all of that, but this week, yeah. So I had a chat and you're about to hear it with chloe kaye.

PAUL: 2:30

In the last couple of years, chloe's career as a dj and producer of genre blurring house music has really blown up, and the culmination of this has evolved in the lgbtq plus event series. Smile, launched last year. Now this year, having toured america, currently heading across europe, the smile night and the record label that chloe set up alongside it strive to distill the energy of queer rave culture into a single night. The idea is to celebrate diversity and a pure love of dance music, and it was great to chat and hear her thoughts of an artist that advocates the values that really really do relate right back to dance floor origins at such high regard, values like unity and diversity. And it's interesting to reflect on this with her at a point in dance music's evolution where, even in underground scenes, the pressures of the marketplace, of late capitalism, of business, techno, tm, whatever you want to call it are becoming more and more visible, and we get into this and we also get into how her authenticity is connected to her identity as a queer artist, as a queer clubber and also for chloe, as a rock kid growing up between new york, paris and london who found their way onto the dance floor.

PAUL: 3:55

I found this a really fun chat and also a really insightful chat, and I'm just gonna play it. This is what happened when I met Chloe Kaye. Thanks so so much for joining me today. We're about to see you at the moment. Where in the world are you?

CHLOE: 4:14

I'm actually in Ibiza. Oh, I'm in my studio in Ibiza, yeah.

PAUL: 4:18

So is it sort of gearing up out there? Do you feel like things opening up?

CHLOE: 4:23

I mean definitely. I think April's always a funny month because it's warm, but then it's not so warm and all the sort of seasonal workers start to arrive. Everything's kind of opening up. Slow clubs open next week, which is pretty mad, and you just feel everyone's actually excited. You know it's a. It's good compared to like October, where everyone's just like done.

PAUL: 4:49

Yeah, yeah, definitely, definitely Recharged. And do you feel I mean because you've been touring a lot this year do you feel recharged or do you feel like are you in the energy of touring at the moment?

CHLOE: 5:02

I'm definitely in the touring energy. I like to come back here to recharge. I have a lovely place in the middle of sort of the forest so I get to kind of be around nature and be around you know, just like things that are a little bit more grounding, I would say yeah, I mean I.

PAUL: 5:21

So I mean as your career as a, a producer, a creative director of both a label and a club night is really blown up in the last couple of years. What, for you, do you feel like the biggest pressures that this has brought with it, and also, how do you keep yourself grounded and focused through that?

CHLOE: 5:42

I think for me, a big part of what I do is consistently looking after my mental health and my physical health. Um, you know, I used to be quite heavy partier. I used to definitely push things in excess and just sort of always be kind of just on the verge of having a bit of a panic attack. You know, and, um, I feel like since the pandemic, I've really put a lot of energy into a more balanced life that allows me to be super busy and touring and traveling and handling a lot at once, but at the same time, you know, is a place where I can be happy, because I feel like a lot of artists who are heavily touring a lot of times suffer from mental health and don't really enjoy it as much.

CHLOE: 6:27

And I actually really love touring, I love being on the road, um, and I'd say like I practice a lot of mindfulness things from, you know, meditation to having a sort of pretty strict workout routine. I eat well generally, as much as I can, depending on the country I'm in and the airports I go to. You know I have a pretty strong hygiene with therapy. You know it's kind of managing all of these things that are equally as important as your career, because you only have, you know, you only have one body and one mind.

PAUL: 7:02

Yeah, and was that like, was there any epiphany that went with that, or was it sort of more like a kind of just realizing how important that is, gradually over time to put that lifestyle in place?

CHLOE: 7:17

I mean, I guess that the pandemic was a real moment for me where I, let's say, had the first time in my life the occasion to stop. I mean, it wasn't even an occasion, it was a forced moment to just stop. And you know, it was really difficult to be, to stay still, and it was obviously a lot of anxiety around work and money and just like what is going on. But I just kind of came back to myself and was like, right, let's ground, let's like go through what we can do for ourselves today. You know, and every day was just day by day practices of like okay, let's go for a walk in nature and like, wow, that was really nice. And let's do an online class on YouTube, and like that was really nice.

CHLOE: 7:57

And it was kind of this gradual progression of every day. And actually six months later, when things started to kind of move again, I was like wow, I feel really kind of clear and good and you know, that was really helpful and it just kind of. Then, obviously, my work came back really heavily and busy. I just was like, ok, wait, that's too much. And so I was kind of figuring out the right balance between it all and I just feel like, yeah, this year is kind of the first year where I'm really practicing both things well and I'm feeling great, you know, and I think I'm working harder than I ever have, but I'm feeling pretty pretty good, I'd have to say.

PAUL: 8:35

I'm really happy to hear it. That's great and I think it's interesting with creative work. Is that you have to find that for yourself, don't you work? Is that you have to find that for yourself, don't you? You know, I think in a lot of other roles and jobs and lives, you know, like a like salary work quite often comes with company benefits where they say, here's your gym membership, go and use it. You know you need it. But I think, in in creative work, particularly where there is a potentially hedonistic element to it, um, it's not really spelled out and the temptations to kind of party are really really in your face, like right literally as a dj right in front of you, um, compared to, so you have to kind of find it and do you think that's something that's kind of come to you with? Um, you know you mentioned through the pandemic, but also through finding, did you ever get bored of the sort of hedonistic lifestyle? Did you also kind of have enough of it as well?

CHLOE: 9:31

yeah, I mean, I think I mean I've done my fair share of partying, like I think I started raping when I was like 14 and I was, like you know, underage and trying to find every single you know illegal thing I could do and every single sort of illegal thing I could do and every single sort of illegal thing substance. You know, I definitely did that for a long time and I just think that, you know, obviously at the beginning of any DJ career, everything's still super exciting and fresh and partying and staying up late, and you know you can handle it, but it's just something like my body just shifted one day and I just couldn't do it. It was like the late nights and the flights the next day and then the gig were just like really affecting my mental health. It was like, you know, I was showing up to gigs exhausted, with no energy, not able to talk to the promoter, you know, feeling like shit, not playing great, not digging for records, playing quite you know average sort of you know your baseline set to get through the night and then going home and getting back on Monday and just being absolutely fried and then kind of having to do the same thing again and it just, and I just kind of was like, yeah, it's fun to party, but it's not worth what I feel after.

CHLOE: 10:43

And because I'm a producer and because I then have work that I want to do and I really enjoy being in my studio and I want to be productive, I started talking to quite a few friends and mentors of mine and sort of my therapist, and I was just like I can't do this, like I can't, I can't tour like this. This is crazy, you know. So we actually now have like a pretty strict system where, like when I, before touring, I look at my schedule for the month and I kind of just pick the dates, I'm like right, that date we're gonna party, all my friends are gonna be at that gig, I'm not traveling the next day or for two days. I can actually relax and enjoy being out late and not be stressed about having to keep performing all weekend.

CHLOE: 11:22

And it's been, like you know, definitely moments where you slip up and you're like oh thursday and I'm already hung over and it's friday, but you know, I think for the most part of it I stick to it and it's made a big difference because it means that I'm able to sustain this kind of crazy level of touring and sustain the creative output and sustain having friends and having, you know, a partner and having still still being focused and not being completely consistently just in a state of calm down or depression yeah, yeah, yeah, and it's interesting because you sort of mentioned about the, the sustaining, the different things that and I'm always interested about um, the.

PAUL: 12:02

there's this kind of assumption that being a producer and being a DJ are completely kind of interlinked and most of the time DJs are producers and producers are DJs and it mashes together. Do you feel like you associate with one more than the other, or is it a very, very equal mix for you?

CHLOE: 12:23

I mean it's. It's a tricky question, because I was a producer songwriter before I was a DJ and so for me, I grew up playing in bands and so DJing was like the last thing on my mind as a career. You know, it was like no, I want to be in a band, I'm going to play guitar and piano and like write sad songs and, like you know, make it as like a rebel teenager. And then it sort of transitioned into oh, I like raving, that's really fun too and like electronic music is cool. And then I started DJing and I was like okay, now I'm DJing, but I've got to make electronic music, because that's what DJs do. And then I was like, wait, but I make rock music. So I was just really confusing at the beginning about who I was, and now I feel like over you know I've been.

CHLOE: 13:08

DJing for a while now and I've managed to merge the two and so I think they're really equal. You know, I spend today a little bit more time on the road than on the studio, than I would like, um, but eventually, like when I get to my studio, it's equally as much love that I have for production and as much time as I still put out a lot of music. I spent time on the road, on my computer and studios wherever I go, so it's it's, I'd say it's a big part of who I am.

PAUL: 13:36

And do you find, do they influence each other as well in terms of the output, like, do you do your productions get influenced by the spaces that you dj in?

CHLOE: 13:47

yeah, I feel like it's really interesting because when I was djing at the beginning, I used to play a lot of sort of weirder rock and disco and I'd say more musical djing. So it was like a lot more song formats. And now I'm definitely playing more electronic, just sort of I'd say more, less song formats, right, sort of longer, longer songs, longer things. Some tracks don't even have a lot of melody, it's just pure groove. And I definitely now, when I go back to my studio with these kind of you know, when I'm, when I'm digging for records and all this kind of stuff, I definitely try and bring some of what I'm hearing on the road, hearing out, hearing from other producers, into what I'm doing on a production level music, you know, and I definitely think that I would love to be able to kind of bring back my early elements to sort of rock music and songwriting into the electronic music space.

PAUL: 14:50

But that's definitely like an interesting way to kind of merge everything together, I'd say yeah, it's interesting these um, I didn't know about your rock roots and I do feel that there's quite a lot of DJs that I know that do have a rock background like I can think of, like daniel avery and hi um, who kind of they have their kind of sort of drone and psych rock kind of background as well. Um, and I remember like in the 90s when I was growing up, it felt like djs all seem to be this breed of just pure house techno people like through and through, and I had this kind of like idea that maybe it's because electronic music feels more alternative to people, like offers more of an alternative language and sort of series of options for people, than guitar music does these days. Do you feel that is there something in electronic music that is like a kind of escape for you as well from, I guess, from the norm really?

CHLOE: 15:51

I mean, I think what really happened to me when I sort of entered my first rave and electronic sort of music community when I was about 15 was yeah, 14, 15 was it felt the same way that it felt when I went to my first rock concert, which I think was like this element of freedom, hedonism, you know, like this same thing of this naughty corner right, and I just feel like when you're a kid and you listen to rock music, you know it gives you the same energy, it allows you to be who you want to be. And when you kind of go to rock nights like I used to go to a lot of rock and roll concerts and these sort of nights that were put on in Paris that were every Friday you'd have three bands playing in a row and you would go and you wouldn't necessarily know the bands but you'd go and discover music, but we would dance. You know we'd be on the dance floor, there'd be mosh pits, then I would go to raves and I'm like this is not that different. You know it's a different, obviously, tone and the speakers are way bigger and you know the music is a lot louder in terms of, like you know, just when you hear your first big kick drum in a proper club. It's like whoa, but it was the same type of energy that was coming out of the crowd and I remember being like this is the same, it's just a different, it's called something different, and I just think that's what I've been chasing my whole life.

CHLOE: 17:17

You know, is these kind of is music that makes me feel something, and I feel like dance music for me was just an immediate feeling and I think rock music was the same, and I think you have amazing artists like andrew weatherhall who just perfectly kind of combined the two and that's why I think he was one of the first djs that I saw when I was really like wow, like you can do both, like there is an intermediate where, like rock music and psych rock combines an electronic and it just works and it gets this, you know and I think people have done it over the years and hi is a good friend and you know I we always talk about the sort of roots of coming from a song writing background, and how does that translate when you're actually producing electronic music and how do you get that same energy?

CHLOE: 18:01

and it's definitely. I think they're synonymous with each other.

PAUL: 18:04

I would say definitely I feel that too. I mean, maybe people express it differently, um, but like, if I listen to something like Stereolab or Broadcast, there's something about the sort of tone of it, but like to me doesn't feel that different from like what I might experience in a club in Berlin.

CHLOE: 18:22

Really, no, I mean definitely not, I think. I just think it obviously depends, right, because rock is so vast as a genre, similar to electronic music, and I think it just depends on what pocket of rock music you, you, you fall into. But like if you go into some really psychedelic sort of experimental rock and you're going into like really trippy corners of what people do with their instruments and sort of experimental rock and you're going into like really trippy corners of what people do with their instruments and sort of sound design and guitars and effects and like it's, it's pretty similar to what you can go to out in a club in berlin, like the same kind of like, just like really experimental trippy, nice feeling, I'd say definitely, and you mentioned there as well about um going to band nights in Paris and from what I know and forgive me if I'm wrong you grew up between Paris, new York and London.

PAUL: 19:13

How did that impact your early experiences of experiencing music and experiencing the social life around music?

CHLOE: 19:23

I mean, it was all social, like music was where we went to hang out with friends, you know, when I was young. Well, so I lived in Paris between the age of 11 and 15. And it happened to be a really interesting time in Paris when music like the Ed Banger sort of scene was starting to have its first, you know, community-driven parties at the social club. Then we had our rock nights, which were at this club called Le Triptyque, which were called I can't remember, I don't I don't remember the name of the night, but that was on Fridays, and so first it was the rock and roll and then social club actually ended up taking over from that club and becoming the sort of a banger community. But every Friday night we would meet with our friends and we would all dress up and we would all go listen to music. And it was this sort of community driven way of listening to music and to bands. And all week, from sort of the Monday to Friday, I'd be online listening to the most you know underground sort of rock and roll bands I could find from like the 60s, like 70s, sort of psychedelic rock scene, garage rock scene. Then on friday you showed up with your friends and like you'd show them the music you'd be listening to before, like the pre-game, and then you'd go listen to the band, you know, and I just remember like we would sit around with friends and listen to music. It was like really special because I feel like a lot of my friends now don't do that anymore, or my younger friends who were, you know, when I was 15, like they don't really do that as much. Everything's quite lonely and isolated. Yeah, but music was really a way to connect with your community at school, your community outside of school, and then was a way to go release with your friends and dance.

CHLOE: 21:04

Um, and when electronic music came, it was just the kind of progression of that right, because we already had our communities, we just all started listening to other kinds of music and, you know, I feel like every city has its own scene, has its own specific genre based thing, but ultimately we're all seeking. We were all seeking for the same things in all the places that I was living. So I managed to find lots of incredible people everywhere I went and really music was like you know what made you make connections, because I always traveled a lot as a kid and so it was an easy way to be like hey, you like this music. Okay, we can be friends. Let's sit down and like talk you know, yeah, 100%, definitely.

PAUL: 21:43

I feel like for me, music opened up everything. For me, 100%, definitely. I feel like for me, music opened up everything for me. It kind of changed me from being quite a lonely person to quite a, and then, uh, and then suddenly there's this sort of you know, it also opens up the kind of cupboard of lots of other people that have probably had similar experiences as well. You know, did it, did it really open up you socially as well, like that then?

CHLOE: 22:20

I mean massively. You know, I think as a teenager, like I didn't fit in anywhere, you know, I felt really alone and alienated and I wasn't like a popular girl, like I didn't fit in in like any category, but I loved music and music was like and I played piano and I knew that there was something about music, that was going to be something, but I didn't know what. You know, and it definitely, like me, developing my musical journey and taste from a young age definitely, I think, allowed me to enter really cool places in the world. Like you know, I moved to Bristol when I was I just turned 16 and it's so funny. I was looking earlier all these photos back in the day when I was out in Bristol going to bedlam and all these like stuff, stuff and drum and bass nights. I was like looking back at the people I was friends with and I don't really know a lot of them today, like we haven't stayed in contact.

CHLOE: 23:13

But I remember being 16 and landing in Bristol and suddenly, because I'd been listening to sort of French electronic music, I suddenly met all the local kids in Bristol that listened to local sort of Bristol electronic music, which was more drum and bass and dubstep.

CHLOE: 23:28

But suddenly I went and pivoted into that world and you know, then I met my community there that I ended up spending years hanging out with and going to raves, and that moved into something else. And you know, you, you meet crews of people and I feel like when you share music and you share the love of going out to nights and you share the love of going to listen to music, out and dancing, and you know, at the time I think ecstasy was a big thing when I was younger and you know, just sort of like enjoying the art of raving together was just was really special, like it's something that like it's hard to explain if you haven't done it, you know, but you just feel really seen, I think, when you, when you kind of find your rave community, I'd say definitely, and I love the way you say that the art of experiencing it as well.

PAUL: 24:14

You know, I've had experiences where I've tried to describe that to friends that aren't into that at all and I just sound like the weirdest hippie on the planet when I kind of say, yeah, and everyone was just together and you know it just doesn't land at all yeah, it's.

CHLOE: 24:31

I just think that as quite a loner kid and a kid who was just not really, you know, for a long time, know my place in the world, I suddenly was like, okay, I love going out, I love going out in nightlife, I love listening to music out, I love dancing, I love talking to people on the dance floor, I love meeting someone in the smoking area, like I love seeing a DJ play. But at the time DJs were not. You barely even knew what DJs looked like. You know, you just went to the night. You knew who was playing, but you didn't.

CHLOE: 24:59

You were never like looking at DJ with your phone, right, we didn't have social media. So it was, it was. It was a very different rave experience. You were really present with your friends in that moment. I didn't even have a smartphone, really. You know I was on like a, you know it was. It was just different and I I definitely love that about, about the electronic music world. You know, I feel like a lot of my friends started that way and it's funny to see all of us now kind of professional and working in the industry and yeah, definitely, and and it has changed a lot and like I think one of the particular big jumps kind of came with the pandemic as well.

PAUL: 25:35

you know, there's definitely like different things I notice in Berlin that have happened, like there's been a bit more of a relaxing over the whole phone thing and, um, you know people talk about BPMs getting faster as well and I was wondering what your observations were about that, like sort of comparing now to before the pandemic in terms of raving.

CHLOE: 25:56

I mean, it's definitely changed a lot, even since I've been DJing, which is not that long, but it's long enough to have seen, you know, change.

CHLOE: 26:05

I've been playing for just close to eight years now and I think social media has had just such a big impact on our industry, because I think when I started, you know, djs were not really getting filmed and photographed. Tiktok was in a thing. So the element of the club happened in the club and it stayed in the club, you know, and you would go to your night and you would see your friends and you would dance and you were a lot more present and I think it was less about capturing the moment that you were in, but more about being in it. Um, and I think, definitely as a dj, like back then, there was less of this thing around a performance. It was more about playing a good set and you know longer sets, and it wasn't so much about this need for captivating your audience so quickly with fast bpms, because they weren't attentive, because you knew you had a crowd there, your the crowd was coming.

CHLOE: 27:02

They were staying for the night. They were going to leave at the end. So I feel like djs could maybe be a bit more free to fully go into a journey of expression in their sets. Um, and you didn't have to have these big snare roll, drop moments that had like the sort of crazy co2 cannons and like you know, that was like like that was edm. You know that's what happened in edm communities, but in the electronic I'd say more underground scene none of that was happening. But now you're kind of seeing all of it melt. Together is now the new EDM, with the amount of tickets that some artists are selling, everything. The rules have really changed. I just feel like recently, when I'm playing in these big rooms, if you're not playing these big drops, these big moments, you lose the crowd.

CHLOE: 28:04

The crowd is waiting around for, like these big moments, they need the show, they want the performance, they need the tiktok moment. Um, and I think it puts a lot of pressure on to djs because, as I said, like the art of expression takes time.

CHLOE: 28:18

You know you can't hit, you can't tell a story in two songs you know you can't show yourself as an artist in 30 minutes or even an hour and a half, I would say. You know, I'd say for me, like I love playing a long set, I love playing an open to close, and I rarely get to do them anymore because you just don't get the chance to unless you really, really, you know, ask for it and speak to venue and be like right, let's do an open to close thing. Um, and yeah, I just feel like we've lost a little bit of the of the love of just the dance floor and the ravers have changed into being these sort of social media capturing. Capturing, yeah, capturing moments and it's definitely polarized a lot of the industry because obviously you still have the underground long format.

CHLOE: 29:05

Berlin's, one of the main places in the world for that, amsterdam, you know it's civilized, right now there's. You know you still have the underground long format. Berlin's, one of the main places in the world for that, amsterdam, you know tibelis, right now there's. You know you still obviously have these communities that really advocate for that.

PAUL: 29:14

But I'd say, on a general norm, on like a mass, it's not that present anymore and how do you someone that the ideas of community and unity is so embedded into what you do? How do you personally navigate that yourself?

CHLOE: 29:33

I mean, I spend a lot of time connecting with people wherever I go. You know, I think a big part of the person I am, and always have been, is I love meeting people, I love sharing moments with people. So wherever I go, I try to meet the locals, I try to meet the local communities. I try to connect with people online other DJs that I like getting in the studio with people. I always try to make time to play local shows, even if, like you know, I'm flying, let's say, like Brazil, and I have like a big, you know more festival gig, and I try to just kind of reach out on Instagram to local promoters that are doing smaller things and even if they don't have the right amount of budget, doesn't matter. I do it because it's part of connecting with the local communities and that's how you build, I think, a longer career and that's what works for me. A longer career and that's what works for me, and it, you know, it makes me happy to be able to kind of be a part of what's happening and not just showing up playing the big shows, leaving like big shows, leaving, you know, um, yeah, and I think also, like I've built such an amazing group of friends that, just you know, we travel together at times. We just love to do things together. So it's definitely been like a fun journey because as I'm growing, everyone's kind of also growing in their own world and we're all you know I like I have a lot of friends that work on my project with me, um smile, which is my new sort of party brand label community. It's basically all my friends and me working together on putting together a night.

CHLOE: 31:04

So, you know, I I think I think without a community it's a very lonely and isolated, uh, career, I would say yeah, I could imagine quite existential, a lot of lonely mornings in airports and things like that yeah, I mean you think you're also just in your head a lot, you know, because you know it's.

CHLOE: 31:28

You know it's a pretty intense job. It taxes your mind, it taxes your body. You're always self second guessing Should I play this record, should I not? You know, you're always. And now with social media, you're always put up against like there's 10 other things going on that night and your night wasn't that busy, I don't know. There's just, there's so many things that make you consistently put yourself in question that when you have a community that you can bounce ideas off of, you can literally ask like, hey, how was my set? And your friends could be like, yeah, it was good, but you know, next time, I know you can push yourself more. It's just having people that you can consistently kind of grow with.

PAUL: 32:07

I would say yeah, and was that one of the root ideas about setting up smile yeah, 100%.

CHLOE: 32:15

I just again I couldn't find my place. You know, I was like I don't know where I fit in in this music world, like I love everyone and I've got so many incredible friends and mentors and and people that I've met. But I was like I want to build my own thing, you know, and I also want to be able to give a platform for other artists who feel the same way to kind of come and join and also to create just a great party for people to come and dance and have a great time to and experience the love of music that I have and I, I, um, I'm really looking forward to going, sort of talking about it as as um a way of communicating queer rave culture and and a lot of the kind of utopian ideals around that and community ideals about that.

PAUL: 33:00

And I mean, I'm a cis identifying white dude but I always prefer to go to queer nights myself because I just know that everyone is going to be friendly, you know everyone is going to be looking out for each other and I don't feel that sense of competition or multitude of reasons like that. And what for you do you feel like? Because it is a night that does reach lots and lots of a very diverse group of people, a lot of people. What do you feel like is the sort of broader I wouldn't appeal is the wrong word but the broader kind of thing that a queer night can give people that are like a more heteronormatively cis-focused night just can't do.

CHLOE: 33:47

Yeah, I mean, I think it's a few things as a, you know, as a queer, identifying woman and artists. I just think that when you grow up in a body and you don't know where you belong, right, and suddenly, like I came out, I was probably 21. And suddenly I met my people and I was like, oh my god, other lesbians, wow, other gays, other trance, like wow, like this is, this is great. You know, we can all be together and you know that everyone has had their journey of coming out, which everyone's journey is not easy. It's quite complicated. Some people have it easy, some people don't. It just really depends on a lot of things.

CHLOE: 34:33

And and you suddenly find your people and you're suddenly at a party. And suddenly you're at a party that is a queer night, and suddenly you're allowed to be who you want to be after not being allowed to be that person for so long. There is such a sense of freedom and love and community building around that, because everyone knows what they've had to come through to be in that room in that moment. And I just feel like there's nothing quite like that, because I think most people who have not had to come out or not had to go through transition or not had to feel like they were. You know, experienced homophobia or experienced any of these type of things or racism, or you know anything that makes you feel less than others. You don't really know what it's, what it is, and I just feel like going into a queer night when you're looking around and you're seeing everyone. There's just so much love and so much care and support and in a lot of queer nights you know the security I've been trained to, to behave and act a certain way towards our community. You know DJs know ra ravers know from start to finish, you're getting a complete, different experience than I feel like a room where obviously it's not better or worse. Right, it's different.

CHLOE: 35:42

And I feel like as a DJ who's played a lot of different kinds of parties and who has a very mixed and diverse following and who I love, I love everyone. You know I'm the first, I'd say, queer person in my family, you know, and I think it's all about mixing and opening people's eyes into understanding everyone. Right, because at the end of the day, we want to be inclusive and we want to be educational and, at the end of the day, it's about making changes and about stopping homophobia and racism and building inclusivity. It's about people understanding each other and about people being able to share a dance floor in a safe space, in a safe community, and I think that that's been. You know, my goal is kind of bringing both of these things together and just creating a lot of equality between everyone.

CHLOE: 36:32

And I just feel like to answer your question about why a more straight I'd say dominantly straight dance floor rave. I just think people are a bit less aware and I just think maybe people haven't had to necessarily go through so much to feel free in a dance floor setting in terms of owning their body, owning who they are, owning their sexuality. You know, I feel like it's.

PAUL: 36:58

It's just a different mentality a little bit yeah, yeah, that makes a lot of sense to me. Yeah, definitely, it's definitely something I'm on a I'm on a learning ship of with smile as well like you've been touring it this year, you know, started off in America and then now moving into Europe, and what kind of experiences have you found that have kind of collected this sense of unity? Have you have there been any moments where you thought this is, this is exactly what it should be, this is, this is really happening yeah, I mean I've.

CHLOE: 37:30

They've honestly all been so different and so incredible and I've just learned so much through everyone, because obviously it's a touring party, so when you tour something, you end up in different cities, different cultures, different securities, different venues, different ways of everyone working together. Um, I would say my Los Angeles party that I did in oh my god, was it February, april? I can't remember, I think it was March, january, february, march, march yeah was really really powerful because, you know, we really had an incredible mixture of everyone. It didn't matter who you were, and I had a lot of friends who came who were just like, wow, it's been a while since I've been to a rave and there was an equal amount of queer people to cis, straight white men, to women, to trans, to people who wanted just to come dressed in drag, to whichever, to every kind of ethnicity, every kind of religion.

CHLOE: 38:40

You know, it was just, it was so mixed. And, as a dj, when I first, when I walked in the room, I noticed that I looked around and I was like, wow, this is a really special energy and everyone is just getting along. And then I started DJing and first of all, we had quite a lot of smoke on the dance floor so no one could take photos and videos. It wasn't on purpose, but it worked that way, so no one was on their phone.

CHLOE: 39:03

And the next thing, you know, I was DJing and in front of me there was like a gay couple making out, a lesbian couple making out, incredible dancer friends who were, you know, some are trans, some are non-binary. Everyone was dancing together. You had my straight friends in the corner making out. You had like people dancing and I was just like looking around and I was like and everyone was talking and enjoying and there was no hierarchy, because we also don't have, uh, you know, like tables or VIP or any of that kind of stuff. So everyone was just connecting and talking. And after the night I just kind of took it all in and I was like, wow, and my friends came up to me after and they were like I met so many incredible new people, like I felt like I could be free, I took my top off, I danced, I felt like I didn't have to be judged, I could be who I wanted to be and I was just like, wow, that's exactly what I've been trying to build.

CHLOE: 39:58

But I haven't said that but it just happened, you know, and it was just such an amazing feeling because, even as a DJ, I just felt like I could play what I wanted in that moment. You know, do what I wanted. I didn't feel pressured, I didn't feel I didn't feel I didn't feel anything. I just felt like I could be myself as a DJ and that was just a really rewarding moment. I think, um, yeah, we've been kind of having that at every party and the feedback has been kind of that. We had the same thing in Paris where, in front of me same thing there was so many different kinds of couples and individuals and and everyone was just having fun and talking and chatting and meeting.

PAUL: 40:34

It was just really beautiful yeah, that's so lovely, and you still mentioned about how you didn't sort of say that, but it just happened. Do you do you believe in kind of things like affirmations, then, or like living your life in a certain way where it projects out to people and get what you give, kind of vibe?

CHLOE: 40:52

or yeah, I mean, I think life is, is, is energy, right, so what you put out there generally is what you get back, and I mean we definitely put a lot of work into it, right. So, like when we work with venues, like we hire specific security door staff to ensure a safe environment, which is one of the most important things, because you can't mix a lot of people together and not expect certain safety measures in case there is. You know, I hope there never will be, but in case there are any kinds of problems, right, you need people that are trained in order to handle that. You know the lineup that we bring together artists that I really love and artists that I really, whose values I love and whose music I love and whose energies I love, and they're artists that I've been following for a long time, who, a lot of them, are friends, you know. So I know what energy they're going to bring.

CHLOE: 41:45

You know we have a certain amount of hosts that we hire in each city that are part of it. We have dancers that we know that work with us, the venues, the promoters that are co-promoters, the sort of local creatives that come through, so it's it's a whole list of things that happen to make a party work and in order to create that kind of energy. But I feel like if you put intention out there and you kind of work towards attracting the right things to you, things do tend to work. And I have to say, like it's been, yeah, it's been such a pleasure to kind of see it all unfold and and just to be a part of it, like I love djing my party. That's a good thing definitely.

PAUL: 42:22

Yeah, it shouldn't feel like a chore should it?

CHLOE: 42:25

no, you know, I really look forward to djing, even though I'm spending so much money on them and you know I'm not making any money out my parties at the moment it's just so much love and I leave, I go home every night I'm just like, wow, that was so fun that's the life, isn't it yeah?

PAUL: 42:41

it's been great what would you say to the younger you like? If you could kind of you know, I don't know, something weird happened with time and you could tell the younger you something, what would that be?

CHLOE: 42:56

I think, just to not be afraid of being who you want to be. You know, I think I put so much time off because I was really insecure and unsure of you know, needing external validation and you know all these kinds of things, and I wasted a lot of time just kind of second guessing who I was and what I wanted and listening to other people and you know it's good to listen to people that are have the right opinion, but when you're young, everyone has the right opinion. You know, you don't know who you're listening to and I just think the best advice I've I've ever been given, and I think I can ever give myself or any others, is just listen to your gut, listen to yourself and go do what you want. You know, don't. Don't beat around the bush. Stop listening to everyone, stop looking only on social media for answers. Like you have the answers.

PAUL: 43:49

You know what you want and what do you think is the best way that people can find that sense of themselves to do that?

CHLOE: 43:58

I think in a way you have to like quiet the noise, you know, and that means spending a little bit of time on your own. You know being able to when you're young. I know it's so hard because when you're a teenager there's a million things going on in your mind and you're just so focused on getting the right boyfriend or girlfriend and you know belonging to the right scene and all these things are so important as a kid and finding your place is already hard enough. But I just think, like you know, I have three younger siblings and they're so into it, they who they are. They're like, hey, I'm not feeling good, I'm like what's going on?

CHLOE: 44:39

It's just listening to yourself, understanding what that is. Try everything, don't be afraid of trying things. But also, if you're in something and it doesn't feel right, stop, feel right, stop. You know like I feel like a lot of people go into careers and they stay there for 10 years, or even relationships for the longest time, and they know it's not good for them but they keep going. You know, it's just kind of understanding, just coming back to that sense of listening to your body and yourself, because I think when you quiet the mind, you stay still, you have a moment, you go for a walk, you turn your phone off, you just sit there.

PAUL: 45:13

you tend to have a bit more understanding yeah, it's like it's always there when we have those silent moments and where we're kind of using our body a little bit, but silently it just allows everything to kind of come through the way it should really yeah, like I feel like going for a walk is really helpful.

CHLOE: 45:31

Simple, it's like just activating your left and right hemispheres in your brain, you know it's like actually putting one foot in front of the other gets your brain moving and so sometimes, if you've been stuck all day on something or a project, or even when I'm working in the studio and I'm stuck on something, I just can't get the right answer, I just go for a 10 minute walk and I come back and genuinely I'm like, okay, I think I have the answer and then you try again.

PAUL: 45:56

You know it's about trying, chloe, that was it. Thank you so, so much for chatting with me today. I really, really appreciate that, thanks.

CHLOE: 46:04

Thank you so much. Thank you for having me.

PAUL: 46:08

Okay, so that was me, paul Hanford, talking with Chloe Kaye for Lost in Sound podcast, and we had that chat on April the 18th, 2024. The last date of the Smile Tour hits Barcelona on May the 10th. Thank you so much, chloe, for sharing your thoughts with me and us for that. Lost in Sound is sponsored by audio technica. Audio technica, a global but still family-run company that make headphones, turntables, cartridges, microphones. They make studio quality yet affordable products because they believe that high quality audio should be accessible to all. So, wherever you are in the world, head on over to audio technicacom to check out all of their range of stuff. My book coming to berlin is available in all good bookshops or via velocity press, the publisher's website, and the music you hear at the beginning, at the end of every episode of lost and sound, is by thomas giddens, hyperlink in the podcast description. And so, yeah, that's it for today. Thank you so much for listening and I look forward to chatting to you again soon. Thank you.