Navigating Love's Labyrinth with Erin Davis: Matchmaking, Monogamy, and Unwavering Self-Belief

Curiosity sparked, hearts aflutter, and your wing woman at the ready—welcome to a riveting chat with Erin Davis, a master matchmaker. As we navigate the complex landscapes of love and relationships, let Erin's insightful perspectives on matchmaking guide you. Immerse yourself in tales of triumph and trials as we discuss my past relationships, moments of betrayal, and solemn commitment to my present partner. 

Ever wondered what it's like to have a personal cheerleader in the dating world? Imagine no more. This episode explores the concept of a 'wing woman’ and the substantial role it plays in nurturing real connections. Join us as we dissect my unusual monogamy pattern, Erin's ingenious blend of online and in-person strategies, and the pivotal role of self-belief in the dating process. Hear how our fellow love guru, Erin, found her passion and unearthed the rewarding significance of supporting others in their quest for love.

In an enlightening turn of conversation, we delve into the glamorous world of fashion, updates from your favorite TV shows, and the nuances of senior dating. Keep your ears perked as we discuss how to showcase the best version of you – trendy yet intelligent. Listen as we celebrate the talents showcased on BUBBIES KNOW BEST, the diverse backgrounds of the participants, and the comfortable atmosphere created in the studio. As the conversation winds down, we leave you with precious nuggets of wisdom from the matchmaker herself - embracing self-love, acknowledging that people rarely change, and the importance of asking tough questions from the get-go. So, brace yourselves for an episode full of love, relationships, personal growth, and more.

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:04

Morning bitches and dolls If no one told you they love you today, then I love you, Erin wing woman, because I do love you. And Erin, I'm bringing her back before. We did a podcast a few months ago and it just got so many downloads and, oh my God, it was amazing. So I brought you back in because I want to talk about relationships and it's something I know a lot about because you know, I've been in the same one for 21 years. That's a record for me, but before that I was a serial monogamous. Have you ever heard that expression?

Speaker 2: 0:43

Oh, I have, of course it's a rare breed, it's beautiful.

Speaker 1: 0:47

Serial monogamous from 19 to like 55. I was either married to engaged or living with different people, so all right, so let's talk about you. And what do you see is the? And Erin is a matchmaker. She's called Erin Davis wing woman, Am I correct?

Speaker 2: 1:08

You are. I'm not exactly a matchmaker by old school terms, Like when you think of a Yenta and and you think of a Bobby or you think of somebody who sets you up like one on one. I'm more of like a queer eye for the straight guy meets female hitch.

Speaker 1: 1:23

Say that again, say that again. I love that.

Speaker 2: 1:26

I am queer eye for the straight guy meets female hitch If you've seen both movies and shows, because I'm basically an all inclusive package to help you find your person without just doing a one on one setup. So basically I provide all the services to give you what you need to find love Very similar to those throwing stuff for your dog to play with. Yes, I know I got my dog here in the background.

Speaker 1: 1:56

We can't. We can hear you, but we can't see you. It's all audio. It's funny for you.

Speaker 2: 2:02

But I know, but that you can. You can see him. So people wonder why you're laughing. You know that you're watching.

Speaker 1: 2:08

This is his partner.

Speaker 2: 2:10

I'm showing his squeak toy right now, but this is just like him and this is. This is his relationship of 21 years.

Speaker 1: 2:19

So we met a few years ago when I was on that one. It was it 2017 or 2018, or both.

Speaker 2: 2:27

Right. No, you're right, it had to be at least five years ago. Yeah.

Speaker 1: 2:30

So Aaron became, with the host of our original Bobby's Note best show and it was just really a great show. We did a 2017, 2018, maybe 2019. And then, of course, the pandemic hit and all the world, like start, fell apart or began to fall apart, or whatever. Anyway, we're trying to put it back together again.

Speaker 1: 2:55

And then we we got noticed that we would be doing Bobby's Note best again and, lo and behold, unfortunately or fortunately, whatever we had a different host, marnie, who was fabulous, and then come to find out, you know, within the past month, that Aaron Davis was coming back at the house with the most and I and I was particularly unbelievably thrilled about it. So here she is, you know, she, I feel like, yeah, she has that air and you have that joie de vivre, your personality, the way you look, your youth, you know, it's just amazing. So, yeah, so I just wanted to talk about how you came back and, you know, bringing your, you know, your know-how, your mazel, everything else to the show, which is just, we filmed three episodes, so last week, we're going to film some stuff on Sunday and I'm thrilled. So take it away, erin.

Speaker 2: 4:02

Oh, that was such a warm welcome, Bubby. I am so grateful to have you. I think you saw how emotional I was being back on the set. But, to use one of my favorite Yiddish words, I do feel like it was really for Cher to have moved to LA when I did, because I never thought I'd be able to come back to the show.

Speaker 2: 4:21

I understand that during the pandemic I moved permanently to the East Coast and it's shot out here and Marnie was wonderful in the meantime. And then to come here and to have given up my Bubby dreams and then, thanks to your support and just a little bit of luck, I think they found out I was out here and I could come back. And it's amazing to be part of the launch of our show because I've seen the whole arc of it and I think that's especially important to appreciate where we are now. We are in a shiny little studio I mean it's like Bubby's 2.0, a rebirth, and to be there in the beginning when we shot at bare bones but with extreme talent, and now we have the production quality matching the talent and I'm just ecstatic. I mean it was pretty amazing being there last week with you guys. I can't wait till it comes out and everybody gets to see this incredible show.

Speaker 1: 5:17

This studio is unbelievable. I take pictures all the time and put it on TikTok Instagram everywhere. Oh my God, the job that our producer, andrew Yix, has done is just amazing. I'm just really thrilled with everything that's happened. So, basically, why I brought you back in and obviously our other episode got so many downloads it's to talk about. You know, I could talk about relationships because I've been in them all my life and, as I'm a senior, you know I'm still in the same relationship and I haven't cheated on this part, which I did before. I always cheated on all my old partners and my hub. You know that's what I do. Yes, that was me.

Speaker 2: 6:05

Yes, I did like it. That is juicy, I did not know that.

Speaker 1: 6:08

Well, I know I'm sharing. Oh my God, Wow, I cheated. Oh well, so I cheated Big deal. You know what it? You know it was the right ones.

Speaker 2: 6:16

They weren't the right ones.

Speaker 1: 6:18

But I made a commitment when I got married to this person that I would not, you know, by the grace of God, not, you know, not do that. And that really has changed me, because it's like, you know, it's like watering the own grass your own grass, in the, in the yard, instead of looking for better grass. It's all the same grass, it's just different grass. So you know, that's what I mean.

Speaker 2: 6:46

I'm surprised, you little minks, not surprised.

Speaker 1: 6:50

You're not, oh well, yeah, I love men. It's raining man. I love men too.

Speaker 2: 6:53

Ed is magic, though I do think cheating is often a symptom of something much larger, and I think Ed encompasses everything that makes him such a great partner. It's it's different, you know. It's it's different with him. I love how he is with you.

Speaker 1: 7:11

He is like, takes me. I don't know how he like puts up with me, but he does, he does. We'll talk about today, because today is different, and when I met Ed of course it's probably the same thing how I would meet somebody today. That's just me, I'll talk to anybody. I'll you know. If there's an attractive man or a person, I'll talk to them.

Speaker 2: 7:32

But you'd have, you'd need a wing woman. I don't know, I wouldn't.

Speaker 1: 7:36

But tell me what? What is the definition of a wing woman?

Speaker 2: 7:39

So a definition of a wing woman I've kind of made it up. If people just say, oh, is that a wing man? A pickup artist, when you go to a bar, it's your friend that goes to hit on your target for you and I say, no, I've changed the definition, especially with what my job entails. I say that I am your personal cheerleader. A wing man is your hype man, hype, h-y-p-e, hype. So what I do is I really build you up and I kind of make you fly. So that's where I get.

Speaker 2: 8:08

I've kind of made my own definition of wing woman to mean that so really I'm there to hype you up, support you, be your cheerleader and make you fly and be your best self. But by the typical definition and what most people think it is, a wing woman breaks the ice at a bar or at a place. So how you just said, you'd have no trouble approaching somebody. A lot of people have a problem, trouble these days. So what do they do? They hire a wing woman to help be that cushion, to be that middleman, that icebreaker, that kind of goes up to their target, whether literally physically, in person or actually remotely.

Speaker 2: 8:41

I get hired to do target work where somebody will say, oh, I have this dream, my dream girl. This is her and they show me her on Instagram and I try to find different psychological tactics to help them get their dream, so that they don't just reach out randomly by DM. We come up with a more clever, more thoughtful way for them to meet their dream. So it can mean anything. It can mean a wide variety of things. So I gave you more of like a macro definition being a hype person but the micro I work with, the little strategies to help people in the love world.

Speaker 1: 9:17

Okay. So as a, if I was single at my age, of course I would. I couldn't I believe I could meet anybody. But let's say a woman was shy which I'm not.

Speaker 2: 9:28

Oh, my God, you, what's that Bell, that word? Have you ever? Do you know what it means?

Speaker 1: 9:33

Shy S-H-Y. What does it mean? What's the acronym for shy?

Speaker 2: 9:39

The antonym is Bubby SJ, that's not it, oh what.

Speaker 1: 9:44

But if, like I said to you, Erin, you know my husband is past and I want to meet somebody else, what would I, what would you suggest I do? And I'm, I'm looking for somebody like my husband, who is funny, sweet. You know I love chubby men. Chubby chubby has to be a little chubby.

Speaker 2: 10:04

I'm not into, like the physical fit, a Johnness type of man oh gosh, that's what I love, okay, good, we won't be competing for the same older man because we both like All right, so he can be six years younger or six years older.

Speaker 1: 10:18

He, you know it has to be self supporting. What would you do for me?

Speaker 2: 10:25

So I do a combination of strategies. These days, I mix them on purpose. I believe you need to cast your web wide. You have no idea what's gonna catch, what's gonna work, so you need to try everything. So I do a combination for typically somebody that's in your hypothetical scenario. I would put you on the dreaded online apps. I'd give you a makeover first and I would run the apps for you so that you don't have that strength.

Speaker 2: 10:50

My favorite one that I have done for a few seniors recently is just simplymatchcom. Who is that still around? I did Silver Singles in Florida and then, depending on religion, I did Christian Mingle, also for a really nice gentleman in his 80s, and so I would do that. I do a little makeover. Make sure that we work together to make you your true self, shine and your photos and description, and I would run it for you, because apps can be very, very overwhelming and disheartening. Number two I would reach out to my network Wherever I am.

Speaker 2: 11:24

I think what makes my business so successful is I have been doing this for 15 years and I have made a giant, giant network wherever it mainly in big cities, I would say.

Speaker 2: 11:34

So I would reach out to my LA network to play matchmaker and my target would be to get you into very small events in which someone has a few people in mind for you that I can connect with to get to you. My favorite thing of all to match someone out is a Shabbat dinner, so my goal would be to get you at a small Shabbat dinner in which I am present and I help you with the entire pre-gaming, the warming up for it, the getting dressed, the getting excited, and then I'm there to kind of break the ice with the people that I'd want you to focus on. So I think it's very important to balance online with in-person fun, and I would even let us have some girls night out where we go to a cocktail bar and I just simply bring up some conversation starter points with different people around us, not even for love, just to get you out and about and confident and excited and having a blast with me because it's a whole holistic thing.

Speaker 2: 12:33

We work on home, your work, your body, not yours, because you're too beautiful and petite. But if you have goals, like oh, I want to fix my hair. I want to gain weight, lose weight, gain muscle. I would do a whole holistic package to get you happy and meeting men in those different ways.

Speaker 1: 12:51

Wow Now. So how could people reach out to you to get this package from you?

Speaker 2: 12:57

So I'm very lucky. I work quietly through referral. Now I'm very grateful to the media which got me out there and so I don't do any marketing. It's usually very quiet. I kind of have to find me. So I'm online. I do have a website, it's just Aaron Davis WWW, and I get a lot of messages through there. And then my Instagram is Aaron underscore, wing woman.

Speaker 2: 13:19

So I get a lot of messages there. I have my own new podcast too, and, yeah, people typically find me quietly online. I don't even make business cards anymore, because it's just word of mouth.

Speaker 1: 13:31

A lot of people use this business cards anymore. I'm just saying right.

Speaker 2: 13:36

I still old school, I still read old books. I mean, I love it. So Right.

Speaker 1: 13:41

And then there's another one to ask you this question the show which I have met, gary the Golden Bachelor, and I danced with Gary. I mean, I was walking. You didn't know that. No, a week before they did the Golden Bachelor, they invited me to the opening at Mel Steiner on Sunset Boulevard. Everything was gold, I was wearing red, of course, and I just wanted to talk to him. So, being me, I waited until he was interviewed by different people and I went up and talked to him and met him. He's very sweet. And then that song at last my love is coming along. And I said to my husband Ed, do you mind if I dance with your wife? Which I thought was really sweet of him to ask Get off him.

Speaker 2: 14:28

I love that.

Speaker 1: 14:29

So I danced with him and we danced and I whispered in, gary, there, and I said so did you meet your lady? Love for the Riko? And he said to me do I look happy? So that tells me that he didn't tell me who it was, but he did tell me he met her. So what do you think of the Golden Bachelor show?

Speaker 2: 14:47

Okay, I'm obsessed. I'm obsessed with it. First of all, I am an 80 year old woman in a 38 year old's body Hopefully a 25 year old's body because I go to the gym every day but I I'm an old soul and I feel like the bachelor. I've been longing for depth in that show. I've never missed a season.

Speaker 2: 15:06

I started it in seventh grade with Trista and Ryan, and oh my god, I've met them in person, I've done shows with them, but every season I've never missed, and to me it is missing that depth that you can only get from seniors and I.

Speaker 2: 15:26

I think you know this too. I interview all the time for my blogs, research data. I interview seniors about love because to me, we can't figure it out the we just cannot figure out love by the time that life is over. And to me, interviewing the wisest people I know, who've gotten to love the most and the longest, has brought me the greatest wisdom to share with my clients. So it's one of my favorite things to do and I I've been loving the show and what I can tell you right off the bat and if you've been watching it, there were so much, there's so much more emotion.

Speaker 2: 16:01

These people there's so many lessons to be learned by, by senior Dates. They all encompass the importance of not wasting your time, and bachelor is a quick show Okay, we all know the way that is formatted is to make you fall in love quickly, but right, or bring in the emotion. They're looking in each other's eyes, they're engaging in their conversation in a way that says I am giving you a hundred and fifty percent in this moment. They have no ulterior motives of becoming Fox stars. They don't want to be above ESJ, they want to be themselves and they want to. They Did. They want to just find love and there's something really beautiful and genuine about it. I feel Gary's pain. He's loved and lost.

Speaker 1: 16:43

I love that he cries as a man, do you know the crying people I have I'm on six-chock live now too. Does everybody who loves the crying of Gary, you love it or loves the crying, who doesn't love the crying? Okay?

Speaker 2: 17:03

emotional men. Tell me if anybody's weighing in on tic-tac that they don't love it to me. If you can balance masculinity and Protectiveness and you can have a big man that protects you, but at night he can cry with you oh, that's my dream.

Speaker 1: 17:17

Yes, she, oh, someone says, yes, they cry a lot. Don't you think they're crocodile tears? That's what I think? Oh no, I know. Do you think they're crocodile tears? People tell me a man who's goofing cry is everything will arose that bold.

Speaker 2: 17:32

Bachelor is not crocodile the 25 year olds. I feel nothing for them when they cry. And they Got my college boyfriend broke my heart. Yes, it is awful. It's awful, but what Gary's talking about is losing love after four.

Speaker 1: 17:46

I understand that and I agree with that. I knew he was gonna pick up brunette because his wife was a brunette. That's it's time.

Speaker 2: 17:55

When he got rid of Ellen the pickleball player, my heart was broken. I was, I'm a blondie and I'm just like, oh, I guess, but I knew he wasn't yet.

Speaker 1: 18:04

Yeah, I was gonna pick up brunette because his wife was a brunette, but so you like you, so okay. Now Everybody's question is he didn't tell me who we picked and I didn't ask, I didn't want to. Who do you think he's gonna pick? Is he gonna Leslie or Teresa?

Speaker 2: 18:20

Well, I was very thrown by faith, very. I Thought he was very attracted to her, but I hope that at his age he was smart enough to say while she is lovely, yeah, not long-term match based on the her love of her horses, where she Exactly. This is the thing with at. The older we get and this is why I'm worried about Gary, but it says he's found love. The older we get, the more set we are with our life in our way.

Speaker 1: 18:53

So someone here will arose, says Leslie, what do you?

Speaker 2: 18:57

I, I think Leslie, okay, I think Lisa you know why?

Speaker 1: 19:02

why? Because she would look up to him like he was God Almighty.

Speaker 2: 19:15

That's what I feel that she's in love with him. I love their date at the diner. I think her family is amazing. I'm only going and maybe it's editing. I'm staring at Gary's face when he is with these different women right and. I like Teresa's a bleeding heart, and he's not there yet.

Speaker 1: 19:33

Oh, he's the.

Speaker 2: 19:35

He didn't love. He told her that he might be falling, but he didn't say he was in love with her.

Speaker 1: 19:40

He told the other two women he was that he was yeah, he was in love with fate, but I'm kicking out of the curb.

Speaker 2: 19:50

Full episode. I want us to talk about if love is enough, because I thought he really loved faith, but then he made a logical decision.

Speaker 1: 19:58

Yeah, yeah, I, yeah, I think that the crystal, you know, faith, is gorgeous. Of course I don't like some of the outfits. You know, listen from a woman who's got, even at 76, I still have a good body and I still have the boobs. Let's just talk. But I would never have, you know, revealed my body like that in that dress that you it was a little too. I mean, look up my that I didn't like.

Speaker 2: 20:26

They're all wearing denim shorts and little tank tops. And remember, I do makeovers for a living.

Speaker 2: 20:31

And I got to say Bubby, do you know what I love about your fashion? I'm going to just pinpoint one of some of my favorite outfits. You combine, you combine, like senior sexy, with your own flair. And we were talking about this on set the fact you wear these amazing leather pants I have matching ones on twins and then you put on these sneakers that are adorable OK, these are not some podiatrists pick, these are adorable sneakers with your leather pants. And then you threw on some pearls. I mean we were like does she know how to be the trendiest, cutest, appropriate? We know we're all about Everybody on set was just like you are just adorable because you know how to be cute, sexy, appropriate, super, super attractive. Like it just looks so good on you. You have the flair. You would definitely not need female hitches. Makeover services, good board.

Speaker 1: 21:27

Well, I just felt like the other day with the women tell all that to reveal. I don't know. Years ago, when I was young, very young, and I know I had a body to die for and I used to reveal it, I decided to change it up and cover everything. Because why do I need? They need to know my intelligence.

Speaker 2: 21:48

Not my intelligence. You're not just a bod. I lost 50 pounds when I was 19 and learning how to even dress my bod and how to be confident in ways besides, depending on my brain. I mean, when I was in high school and college, my brain was everything and my body definitely wasn't, and then I learned exactly what happens is that people stop. As I got kind of cute, people started judging me and it was difficult, so we took the cover-up approach itself.

Speaker 1: 22:20

Yes, exactly. So we're filming BUBBY's no Best tomorrow. We're doing different things. We're looking at the dates of the people that we. We have some very interesting people this time, don't we?

Speaker 2: 22:34

Very diverse. I think what I love about BUBBY's versus the Bachelor, for example, is that we try to show all different age ranges, backgrounds, lifestyles. I mean it's really, really cool how much variety we can get in a show.

Speaker 1: 22:48

Right, exactly. Yeah, I think that's really good. So we're filming tomorrow and doing PR and all that kind of stuff. I just wanted to bring you in because you mean so much to me, you know really, and your ability to make everybody feel at ease all the different people we've had come into the studio is just amazing. We had this one guy with. All the other women were like, oh my god, this is the handsome guy, mom, very handsome, we're talking movie. Star looks gorgeous, it's a girl.

Speaker 1: 23:23

I mean they were like. The two other ones were like, especially Linda, cause I know that's her type Great and gorgeous, tall from Laguna Beach and I was like he's too pretty for them, good, but I thought that he's never been married, so that already says something to me.

Speaker 2: 23:41

So handsome. I remember I told you guys, if you don't pick this guy, hello, just kidding, you have a boyfriend, just I do.

Speaker 1: 23:50

But anyways, very gorgeous this guy, Gorgeous, but anyway, you'll have to find out who we picked for the beautiful woman that came in. It was just amazing. So we're doing this show and hopefully soon it'll be on again so you could see all of us. But I had to bring Aaron in to do a podcast with me and we might have some exciting news in a few weeks. I'm not gonna say what it is here yet, but if you wanna find out about dating how to date, where to date because you do need help. I mean especially people my age, young people, I don't know. They probably need help too because they don't know what they want. And it's just so many choices today of where to meet people, right?

Speaker 2: 24:38

Everybody needs help and they also need support. People need support as they go through. It's a very hard process these days, actually, no matter what your age is, and you need a friend, a partner in crime that's not gonna judge you. I started the job because I didn't want people to just turn to their families and their close friends to reveal their dating life secrets, because I wanted them to feel that they have an unbiased partner in crime along the way.

Speaker 1: 25:04

There you go, so we're going to wind up. Willow Rose says set me up, bobby, I wanna find love. Oh, oh Well, you could reach out to Aaron. I'm sure she could help you. Okay, aaron Davis, wingwoman on Instagram. Willow, okay, I love that name. Willow, me too. We're going to what. Do you have any words of wisdom as a matchmaker that you would give to the world? Does? This is gonna go on Spotify in a few minutes.

Speaker 2: 25:35

Of course. Of course, I would say first of all I know it's cliche you must love yourself very much in order for you to find love. And then, when you do meet someone these days I'm all about efficiency and fun have a great time, but ask all the hard questions up front and understand that people do not change. You must love somebody as they are and see if you can come together and build something beautiful as two independent people. So that's what I say to look up for at the front and the front of things in the beginning and get on top of it.

Speaker 1: 26:07

But yes, that's it All right, my darling Aaron Davis Wingwoman, If no one told you they love you today, then I love you. Thank you for coming on Morning Bitches, and we'll see each other tomorrow and then next week, and I love you, gorgeous girl.

Speaker 2: 26:27

Love you. Love you, jc soon.

Speaker 1: 26:29

Bye, you're a piece. Goodbye. Number 161 has already started working off the.