Ep. 40 Creating Order for a Peaceful Life and Finding Purpose to Avoid Regrets

Are you setting yourself up for chaos or paving the way for tranquility? The answer lies in the order we create in our lives - a structured lifestyle that fosters peace. This episode unravels how consistency, discipline, and structure can transform chaos into order, and subsequently, peace. We also shed light on self-awareness, emphasizing the need to understand our tendencies and fears, key components in our life's navigation system.

The next part of our discussion pivots towards an equally compelling topic - finding purpose and meaning in life - a powerful antidote to the regret of wasted potential. We challenge the notion that a family and bills are the sole motivators in life. Instead, we highlight the importance of discovering a purpose that ignites passion and catalyzes action. As we conclude, we ponder over the choice between purpose and regret, echoing Tony Robbins' words of wisdom that "Discipline weighs ounces while regret weighs tons". So tune in, gear up, and embark on a journey towards a purposeful life, free of regrets.

Nathan Mansfield
Instagram: @nathanmansfield

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Most of you will spend your entire life in a job that you hate and complain about it, but never do a thing about it. But for those who want change, listen up. You Men want peace, but oftentimes are creating their own chaos in their lives. They're creating their own chaos. They're they're constructing their own storms, and when you really look at a man's life, you look at does. The number one question I would ask is does he have order? Because the antithesis of order is chaos, and so if you're a man who is living a chaotic lifestyle and craving peace, but can't seem to find that peace in your life, likely it's because you have no order in your life.

Speaker 1: 0:57

And order is structure, order is consistency, order is discipline. Most men live undisciplined lives. They're not consistent with their work, with their workouts, they're not consistent with their work, they're not consistent with the things they do, and that is a result of a lack of discipline. And so discipline is one of the number one things that we need to instill in our lives is having a Disciplined approach to the things that we do, making sure that we're honoring our commitments and not just our commitments but what we owe to other people and living the lifestyle that is structured in a way that leads us to freedom. So if you want more peace in your life, it means you need to create more order, and order is discipline. It's it's having a system set up for your life and your day to live the life that you want to live, and likely it's the things that you don't want to do.

Speaker 1: 1:45

I Believe that most of the things that need to be done in a day they actually move you forward, that move the needle in your business, that make you more healthy, that make you love the body that you have are actually all the things that you don't want to do. Life is more about what you don't want to Do than what you want to do, because if you live a life of what you want to do, you'll end up in the chaos, hating your life, just as you may be feeling right now. So at some point you have to become to terms that. The things that are required for you to get to where you want to be, the thing that you keep proclaiming outside, that's the place that you want the million-dollar business, the successful marriage, whatever it is that you're wanting is found in the midst of discipline in order of Of living a structured lifestyle that is not chaotic and that leads you to the freedom that you're looking for. There's. There's a discovery that has to be done of Like knowing yourself and knowing your tendencies and your nature, and if you don't know that, then you don't know what you fear. So it what's what you? What I'm hearing is that if you think that's your fear, it probably is your fear Because there's some, there's some, I Unknowns, in your voice of like well, I don't know if I'm that person, but if you're pronouncing that thing from your mouth, it probably is innately in your nature to be that person which tells me that You're answering your own question, which is, you do have a fear that I think that inside of every single one of us there's a, there is a piece of laziness that I mean don't get me wrong like I'm a go-getter, I work a lot of hours a day, but I think if I was left to my own demise at times I could be very lazy.

Speaker 1: 3:26

I think there are motivational factors that keep us going and keep us moving. When we have a wife and a kids and a Family and and bills to pay, like those things keep me going. But I think the difference is. This is the question that you have to ask yourself is that am I doing something that gives me purpose? Because here's the thing, here's the truth about this is, if you're doing something that gives you purpose and that you feel Significant or substantial about what you're doing for the world, then it overrides any place of laziness.

Speaker 1: 3:58

If you're just working a job that you hate, if you're just working a job that doesn't light you up, then you can easily dip into the the laziness. You can easily get complacent, take it easy, cut corners right. But if you actually genuinely love what you do and it fires you up and there's intensity in your bones to get out and do the thing, then probably you're working it because you actually like what you do and that's exciting for you and that's the best place to be in. Because if you just work for money, you're going to live in the ebbs and flows of life of like getting excited about money and then and then losing that excitement. Or getting money and then doing nothing because you have money. So then you get lazy and then you lose your money and then you have to get back and work for your money. But if you live and you work from a place of passion and purpose and meaning, then it's consistent. You don't have to worry about the rises and falls as much in the trajectories as if you were doing something that's just for money that you actually hate.

Speaker 1: 4:58

So I think the question for you is do you genuinely love what you do? And if and I can tell by the way you treat your business right, you, if you didn't love what you did, you wouldn't have made this success and you probably wouldn't have this level of camera equipment in this eye that you have right. So I wouldn't say it like there is. There is a lazy tendency in you, just like there isn't me, but the fact is that you're not willing to step there because it it excites you to get to work and get things done. But I think the truth is we all have it in us.

Speaker 1: 5:32

If you were to go, put you on, put yourself on an island by yourself, and someone's like, hey, there's no one watching over you. And they're like, hey, I want you to build 12 houses over the next 20 years. And you're like there's no one ever going to check on it, on me, and I don't really care. If this gets done, it doesn't really make a difference, like it doesn't provide anything. You're just like hey, go build 12 houses and the next 20 years you're going to be here by yourself. You got food, you got water. Nothing Like of course. You're going to like are you going to do it? Probably not. Why? Cause it doesn't bring any purpose to you. It doesn't bring any purpose to anybody else, it's just a job to do. Yeah, it doesn't provide your needs. Like, well, of course you're going to be lazy, I'd sit on the beach and drink, drink more.

Speaker 1: 6:11

I read this too. It's like it's it's. It's actually one of the it is probably the number one mission for me in my life is helping men to find purpose and meaning in their life. I think that 90% of men will walk through life. They'll go to college, potentially join the military, and then they'll sink into a job by the time they're 25, 26. And they'll actually either bounce from job to job or climb the corporate ladder, hoping to get promoted, to get a little bit more pay, to be incentivized by something, hating everything that they're doing, but doing it because there's security, because they're providing for their family.

Speaker 1: 6:51

Once you have a wife and a kid. Now you're like well, I got to keep this safety. I got to keep this money because if I, if I, escape it, then you know there's an uncertainty of providing for my family. And so then you get locked into prison and most of the men live in prison from the time they're 25 to the time they're 65, hating a job, waiting for the 401k to pay out, waiting for social security, waiting for their retirement. And then they look back on life at 65. And they think to themselves what the hell have I done? What the hell have I done? One of my biggest fires and purposes in life is to prevent the 65 version of you saying what the hell have I done with my life.

Speaker 1: 7:31

Because for me, the pain of that, that you can't take back your life, that you can't roll the tape back and make some different decisions, the thought of me just sitting here, going, seeing myself at 65, wasting my whole life for a paycheck, going what the hell did I do? And not only just what the hell did I do. What influence did I have along the way? I have three boys. I have three boys. Who am I if I just live in a job and live and work a job that I hate? What influence am I showing them of what they should do with their life If that's how their father lived his life. I want my kids to know, I want my boys to know that their dad fought every day of his life, doing something that he loves, to make an impact and an imprint on the world and on them, and that when they look at the legacy of my life they say my dad was an honorable man that fought tooth and nail to do the right thing for humanity, to do the right thing for other men.

Speaker 1: 8:31

And I didn't just because. Imagine the contrast If I just had a job, like when I was 19, I went to go be an architectural engineer. Not that that's not a bad job, but what if I would have done that for 40 years, just designing some houses and left this earth? Not that that doesn't have purpose, but maybe it's not my purpose. And I lived in a job that made a decent paycheck. And then they go. Dad was an engineer and he hated his job and I could tell by the way he treated me and our family. And to me that's the heaviest mistake we could ever make is to clock in and clock out for 40 years to pay the bills and you can't take that back.

Speaker 1: 9:11

The problem is is the fear. Has you stuck in prison, thinking that you can't get out of it? The fear has you stuck the bills have you stuck. And the longer you say I'll figure this out, next month turns into, I'll figure this out. Next year turns into, I'll figure this out. Now it's five years later.

Speaker 1: 9:34

Now you're 40, now you're 45, and now you're going as too late and so you just stick it out anyways, right? The truth is that you need to change today. You need to be decisive and figure out where you need to go and make an active effort to change your life so that you don't end up with this amount of regret when you turn 65. Discipline is saying it's uncomfortable for me to try to find something newer, to chase my purpose or to live a life that I love, but I'm going to do it anyways. That's discipline, and so I love the quote by Tony Robbins. It says discipline weighs ounces, regret weighs tons, cause imagine the the amount of weight you're going to feel on your shoulders of regret when you don't decide to make the decision for you.