ASPIRE by 3P

EQ - Self Awareness

December 02, 2019 3P Season 15 Episode 1
ASPIRE by 3P
EQ - Self Awareness
Chapters
ASPIRE by 3P
EQ - Self Awareness
Dec 02, 2019 Season 15 Episode 1
3P

EQ - Self Awareness
EQ
20 bad habits of interpersonal behaviours 
https://www.marshallgoldsmith.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/Marshall-Goldsmith-20-Bad-Habits-1.pdf

Show Notes Transcript

EQ - Self Awareness
EQ
20 bad habits of interpersonal behaviours 
https://www.marshallgoldsmith.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/Marshall-Goldsmith-20-Bad-Habits-1.pdf

Speaker 1:

Oh look, good boy, everyone. This is on video, on growth through hierarchy and you couldn't video last week five ass [inaudible] PQ , which is the foundation to emotional intelligence in particular today. It's going to sell sometimes knowing oneself . We'd like just to , to throw into the conversation. That's most intelligence. Well, huge body of work on this and huge subjects we'd like to talk about in the context of work. Are you in control of your emotions of what this is, how we'd like to see it. And it's a frame it as well. So when we talk about HQ , we're saying you're all you, are we in control of our emotions at work? Yup . Yup . So on the flip charts, just the floor first or to talk to you on the video today , um, we believe that we believe that most important factor in contributing to controlling emotions at work is self-awareness. Kevin, repeat that for offense . Most important factor in controlling bottoms-up work is self-awareness and nice. I'm caught their traffic .

Speaker 2:

Yeah. Just , um , just from Google really. Anybody can Google the definitions of these things was just all that was quite an ACE one. Um , so it's definition of self-awareness was just the conscious knowledge , um, of your own character in feelings sorts about your identity, a character, what makes you feel the way you feel. So it's just a nice definition, I thought on the self-awareness.

Speaker 1:

So, so why talk about cell phone ? Why toys emotional intelligence, why is emotional intelligence the foundation to management leadership grow through hierarchy ? If you turn it around? The thing about the negative impacts on not being self-aware, some of the things that you could experience. And so I've experienced personally, you know , stress management. How do you, how do you deal with that? Do you get stressed relationship management? Yeah. Have you got good relationships that's at work and at home as well, cause work spells in the home. What's your health looking like at the moment ? Is stress having an impact on your health management and how motivated are you to those challenges you've got at work at this moment in time? And probably most importantly, what triggers any one of those stents ? This is where we stopped in the various self-awareness.

Speaker 2:

Yeah. And just to , I don't know , a couple of the points you mentioned particularly in the things they did, the relationship manager and especially in the management position , it's about building relationships both with people you're reporting to but also the people who report to you. It's important that you keep good relationships at that level. Um , and it's easy to let people who are just like yourself. So the challenge is to try and um, be aware that not everybody's like you and the drivers and motivators are not the same , but it starts with you yourself and how you're coming across with those people in those relationships. I think that's one of the key elements of the self awareness is have you come across sort of those which we there we'll come on to the bit. We've got jazz , just what does it mean to be self aware? I think we , we are, I've asked people before in the past, what do we mean by self awareness and most people are not even sure what it means because it's not something you consciously think of on a day to day basis. Well, I never used to until we started getting involved in this type of stuff. Lots of different things that you can find. Just keeping it simple. Looking at three key elements of self-awareness. Um, so it's identity, core values and beliefs. So identity really who you are. So who am I as a person? Um, and the core values is about really values is just what's really important to you. Something you see them seen as late themes or left values. So what is really important to you and the last one, their beliefs. Um, what, what are your beliefs in the cause they don't always have to necessarily be true cause you've made me brought up just to believe in a certain thing, but that's not actually true. But some needs you see beliefs and values put together. It's only the three of them. Identity, values and beliefs. We start developing these things from the deal. We're bored and some people argue it's even started before that when you're in the womb and et cetera. Um , so yeah . So from the deal with born or development, yeah . Why identity or values or beliefs and people say , you know, there's a school of thoughts and when you're in your early twenties your values and stuff are probably pretty much in place. And it's only through good self awareness. Can you then start challenging some of those values and some of those beliefs , um, to give you a deep insight into the identity and who you really are. You know ? So just three core elements of, of self awareness that we're gonna cover in this video.

Speaker 1:

Okay. So just to bring you back to the content you're talking about, you were saying self-awareness and stuff . Most important factor to control your emotions at work and anywhere else for that matter. But we're talking about in the work context. So those are the three areas that we'd like to talk about and , and that up. And to give some examples. You know , some people believe in a God. Yeah. One of that may be, and the values, there will be some moves from Christian values and Muslim values around that and some very strong beliefs. Yeah. They asked around that identity about being particular things , particular religion, et cetera, et cetera. It doesn't have to be true, but is to the individual. Yeah, believe so that which is true, we don't question it. Now, if you translate that to something less controversial than religion within a work context, and you might believe that a particular way to behave will get you to a set of results and because of experience that results, that is true. Yeah. Is there a better way to get a set of results? And the answers is always better when it gets set results. So this is now trying to break some of those paradigms. That way we think about who we are, what we really value, things, important life, and those beliefs that we need to start sharing them and start thinking about all of these really serving me well. And it links back to the triggers. What triggers do you have emotionally when you're at work, which will bring around some of these negative impacts, stress, et cetera, et cetera. So there'll be based around beliefs, values, and your core identity. [inaudible]

Speaker 2:

yeah, it's really interesting. Once you start consciously thinking of these things, it's really interesting to see what makes your identity, what you know, why you developed certain values and beliefs and yeah, lots of written around. A big part of this is is links to parents in relationships with parents, whether you like it or not. Um, reduce , a lot of it comes from , from that and obviously what happens after that can moderate or exaggerated or big influences with parents. And it's really interesting to look back and think of what impact my parents had on work . Um, cause that can help you understand certainly when you're trying to be more aware of yourself. Um , to this point. Um, so I find that really interesting mega nuts that Lincoln and thinking more deeply around that relationship , um, and why we are as we are.

Speaker 1:

And maybe just a sort of simpler examples as well. If we identify ourselves as a, as a manager or we identify herself as a leader or a supervisor or a line manager or whatever it may be, then you've got a whole trigger that, okay, whatever. You see that as being for yourself and have a set of values around between and believe something about that as well. Okay, so the grill through hierarchy, which you see on the screen as we talk shows and where , just to break down what we mean by management supporting and by leadership as well. So the identity piece and the values and the beliefs around what management is and what leadership is. We can start to find tuning next we're starting with the foundation, which is emotional intelligence, all you and controlling your emotions and work .

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and because we've mentioned this as you said, that [inaudible] sits as the foundation and we've said at the very start that most important element of emotional intelligence, particularly at work is the self awareness or how critical and important it is to be self aware. Because that will give you the understanding of what you possibly need to change or improve or it can give you a massive advantage in the growth through high Rog iModules , but also the other elements of EEQ as well. Okay. So some of the advice that the takeaways from the da and we've got again, just three things there. So we've got self assessment tools that just, there's thousands of them, literally thousands of them available. Um, yeah you can Google them, just put it in self assessment tools and some of them will measure different things. Some of them are more personality assessments, some are more work preference inventories, some of them more about your communication styles and preferences. We just Google them and give them a try. There's loads of them there for free. Um , if you want to get a deeper assessment, you have to pay a small cost. But there's a lot of them out there for free as well. And there's things that we use. The one we've mentioned before, Harrison assessments, which looks at a whole plethora of different factors including personality, [inaudible] disc assessment, which looks at four particular areas of personality. And there's insights which has got a grid grid set of reports. So there's loads of different assessment tools you can use. And it's an excellent way because a lot of the works don't fly in the background. So the algorithms and stuff that they've done to develop the assessment, you just answered the questions as you see them and then they're sort of figuring some of this stuff out for you. So the really good sort of important one in the middle lane is about listening to others to getting feedback from others, but not just getting the feedback. It's actually listening to what people are seeing. And if you're not quite sure what the mean or you don't necessarily agree with it, then dig a bit deeper and ask them what the mean by that. It's not always nice to hear, but it's a good way of of being self aware and have a cross section of the people that you ask. Or there's the, as a formal , um , approach to this, which is called three 60. It doesn't always need such a , uh , a formal structure. So it names , it's just pick a cross group of people and just ask them about certain aspects of yourself and how you come across in different situations. Um, and the , the third one is about the triggers. Lindsay mentioned it earlier on across, yes , somewhere. It's about trying to recognize the triggers and the more self aware you are of what causes the triggers, the better capability you're going to have of trying to prevent the trigger or change your reaction to the trigger. So recognizing the triggers is really important part of self-awareness. Yeah . Okay, so just look forward to there then. So grow through high rock is the

Speaker 1:

theme that we're talking about in this series of videos a cue , most of the intelligence, the foundational piece of that and for [inaudible] said before, what we'd like to say is are you in control of your emotions at work that Sam was saying? It gives our phrase for that and so they're really focusing on self-awareness and we've taken it through. It's the most important factor. There are some negative aspects to it and those negative aspects you will be experienced in those like the oldest , we know that the some areas that you can have a look at to help, that's identity core values and beliefs and Trump has just been through some advice that Revit to then made the listening elements we you to take some advice. I'll write it down, but he listened to it and do something about that. So really a take home today is um, we're using a quote from Marshall Goldsmith. We try and as executive coaches a long time ago with that franchise and there's a book out there and the type of book is what got me here will not get you there. We're just paraphrasing little bits. So what got me here, sorry, one, the growth through high Robbie, whichever level you're at, what got you here will not necessarily get you to the next level. Okay. So we're just modifying it a little bit. Um , but getting the accreditor to Marshall Goldsmith, it really means you know where you are at this point in time. There's no guarantee that the behavioral range that you've got at this point in time, we'll get you find a management position to a leadership position that need to change the behaviors. And it starts with emotional intelligence and the key one about being self aware.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, just, it's just coming to me made when you talked about Marshall Goldsmith, he's listed it as well. I'm not sure if it's in that book. I wanted the other books, we talked about 20 bad habits of leaders and managers in some ways . Yeah. You have to see it and read it to think, Oh no God, I'm like that. So certain things, it's good to T T to read some of those habits and because you'll recognize yourself in them, but unless it's put in front of you , you don't always make that link or that could be a nice link for the listeners as well. Yeah, we'll share the 20 habits. Cause I'm sure there's some of them in there because when I looked at it I think, Oh no , yes, some of them don't let the managers and leaders bloopers reel is it ? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think I stopped at number eight because I take most of the boxes. So yeah, no , it's good fun to have a look through and is , I see it can trigger ,

Speaker 1:

um , you can recognize some of them in yourself probably . Well it's , it's again, leading back to triggers might be a nice little one that says there's 20 bad habits. Well, yeah , I've got a few of the triggers in that focus on one or two of those that might just help me move through this behavioral range .

Speaker 2:

It's all linked cause some of the habits and some of the, and the think it all links back to some of this stuff with who you owe and why you ate that and then sort of dead interesting once you start thinking about it. It's not easy to get your head around it sometimes in terms of self-awareness, but it's a great starting point when you're looking to control your emotions in the workplace. Okay. And very much Chester's .