As a father, the moment when your child flies the nest for college is both a proud milestone and an emotional whirlwind. Thanks to the wonderful and talented Marcy Stoudt, I'm joined by my new friend and executive coach, Chris Weiss, as we exchange tales from our personal journeys through fatherhood, personal evolution, and embracing the next chapter of life post-retirement for Chris. As a former staffing executive at Aerotek and Aston Carter, Chris is embarking on the next chapter of his life as a coach, speaker, and author. With Chris's insights into authoring a book and entering the world of executive coaching, we underscore the significance of supportive relationships and the profound effects of open communication within the family unit on personal development.
Throughout our conversation, we recount the impactful road trips and sporting games, the life skills learned from family dynamics, and the importance of recognizing our own growth alongside our children's milestones. Navigating the complexities of our past and its influence on our roles as parents and partners can be transformative. In this heartfelt discussion, Chris and I discuss the power of forgiveness and the process of healing from childhood trauma. This episode is filled with so much vulnerability as we discuss the impact of divorce and abandonment.
Closing out with personal reflections, we examine the subtle yet profound moments of kindness and authenticity that define our families. Chris would share the core values most important to him as a father and remind himself to always be present and "be where your feet are."
These narratives and the boomerang mindset encapsulate the essence of our conversation as we share our gratitude and the power of mentorship and encourage listeners to engage in their own journeys of growth and transformation.
Please don't forget to leave us a review wherever you consume your podcasts! Please help us get more dads to listen weekly and become the ultimate leader of their homes!
As a father, the moment when your child flies the nest for college is both a proud milestone and an emotional whirlwind. Thanks to the wonderful and talented Marcy Stoudt, I'm joined by my new friend and executive coach, Chris Weiss, as we exchange tales from our personal journeys through fatherhood, personal evolution, and embracing the next chapter of life post-retirement for Chris. As a former staffing executive at Aerotek and Aston Carter, Chris is embarking on the next chapter of his life as a coach, speaker, and author. With Chris's insights into authoring a book and entering the world of executive coaching, we underscore the significance of supportive relationships and the profound effects of open communication within the family unit on personal development.
Throughout our conversation, we recount the impactful road trips and sporting games, the life skills learned from family dynamics, and the importance of recognizing our own growth alongside our children's milestones. Navigating the complexities of our past and its influence on our roles as parents and partners can be transformative. In this heartfelt discussion, Chris and I discuss the power of forgiveness and the process of healing from childhood trauma. This episode is filled with so much vulnerability as we discuss the impact of divorce and abandonment.
Closing out with personal reflections, we examine the subtle yet profound moments of kindness and authenticity that define our families. Chris would share the core values most important to him as a father and remind himself to always be present and "be where your feet are."
These narratives and the boomerang mindset encapsulate the essence of our conversation as we share our gratitude and the power of mentorship and encourage listeners to engage in their own journeys of growth and transformation.
Please don't forget to leave us a review wherever you consume your podcasts! Please help us get more dads to listen weekly and become the ultimate leader of their homes!
Hi, I'm Riley and I'm Ryder, and this is my Dad's Show, hey everybody.
Speaker 2:It's KCJ Cox with the quarterback Dadcast. I'm excited to announce we have a brand new sponsor joining the show, which is called LatitudeSitkacom, a Latitude 57. Now this company's mission is to provide an unparalleled Alaskan experience that will enable their customers to explore everything that the region has to offer. Additionally, they are dedicated to supporting and promoting the local community, the culture, as well as protecting and preserving the natural beauty that the resources of the region have to offer us. So I'm going there in June. I can't wait. And whether you're looking to find a wellness retreat, if you're looking for a place to take your favorite customer, if you're looking for a way to maybe take your leadership team, check out LatitudeSitkacom, because they will give you some amazing sea exploration from fishing to commercial fishing, wildlife tours, beach excursions, scuba diving, snorkeling, even paddle boarding. If none of those sound interesting to you, well then, go. Stay on land and go ITVing, hiking, hot springs, yoga, take a massage in. The team has over 20 years of local knowledge to serve you, and they also will be able to cook amazing meals while you are there staying in their facility. So go to LatitudeSitkacom now and book that next wellness retreat. You won't regret it. The majestic views will blow you away and, as I mentioned, I cannot wait to get there in June. So with that, let's welcome LatitudeSitka to the podcast and get right to today's episode.
Speaker 2:Hey, everybody, it's Casey Jaycox with the quarterback dadcast. We're in season five and this next gentleman I think we could be like brothers, stepbrothers too, if it comes out. I want to thank the fantastic Marcy Stout for introducing us, and this gentleman is his name is Chris Weiss. He is a he's a knitly, knitly, knitly, knit me line. I can speak English. He's a Steeler.
Speaker 2:I think he booed me because I was one of the only Seahawk fans to show up in Fordfield in 2006. He was one of the people booing me, but I was there to support my Seahawks. He spent 22 years at Arrow Tech, three-ish at Aston Carter and mid-year last year, buddy, he said you know what? It's time to hang up the cleats, time to figure out what the hell life has next for me, which spoke to me because that's the journey that I'm on and it's. It's fun to see dads like Chris following their passion and trying to figure out a bigger way to to impact the world. But, with all that said, we're not as much as going to talk about that. We're going to talk about Chris the dad. We're going to learn how his parents shaped him and how he's working hard to become that ultimate quarterback, or leader of his households. Without further ado, christopher, welcome to the quarterback dadcast.
Speaker 1:Yeah, thanks, case, also to be here, man. This is my first once. This is a, this is a gift. I appreciate it, buddy.
Speaker 2:So you, you know about initiation on first podcast? No, tell me. So you have to light candles and put a bra on your head.
Speaker 1:Okay, that's nothing.
Speaker 2:That's nothing compared to what I've been through.
Speaker 1:That's a piece of cake.
Speaker 2:That's actually false. But the only reason I said that is because I just saw a clip from Weird Science, which was one of my favorite movies of all time, nice, and when they made the girl, they put bras on their head and and lit candles.
Speaker 1:Yeah, You're a movie guy. I'm one of those guys that watches a movie and then I forget it for the rest of my life. I got a bunch of buddies that'll be out quoting movies and I'm like I have no idea what movie you're talking about right now.
Speaker 2:I could not tell you when the war of 1812 was, but I could tell you a line from Caddyshack I mean yeah, yeah, I got a lot of buddies like that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, they don't like hanging out with me though, cause when they go down that road, I'm I'm nothing, I got nothing for them, yeah.
Speaker 2:Hey, maybe it's your, what your your next 50. That's we're going to get really good at. Maybe, maybe, um, okay, so we always start each episode with gratitude, so tell me, what are you most grateful for as a dad today?
Speaker 1:Well, today, that's a good one man. Um, I just recently had my oldest go to school. Um, this is his, uh, freshman year, so he, uh, he went down to Virginia tech. He was a, it was a, it was between Virginia tech and Penn state and, um, I'm actually glad he made the decision to go to Virginia tech. Um, I was actually driving back to him on a visit at one time and I go, hey man, if it were up to me I'd go here.
Speaker 1:Penn state's big and it's got its own place and it's, you know, very cultish and it's uh, oh, I'm not. I loved it. Uh, it was the best place for me but maybe not for him. So he, um, he went down there and I just got a chance to go on Sunday, go back down and get him, and it was, it was a down and backs. It was 10 hours in the car, right Five hours for me. But, um, you know, the first five were easy. Just podcast was early in the morning. I got down there and then, um, the second five were just the best man I got to spend time with my oldest and just talk and he was so attentive and so excited to be home and just to just to hang out with me.
Speaker 1:And, you know, for those people that have college kids, it's like when they come back, everybody tells you when they come back they're changed, um, and he's, he's just changed so much, he's turned into this like awesome human being. You know, and it was funny, I was sitting down in the couch when I finally got home and and, by the way, it rained for nine and a half of the 10 hours, like I got down there, I put his stuff in the car. It was raining. We went to lunch it was raining. Um, finally, the last like half hour, I was able to turn off my windshield wipers, so you know how that is. So I was like I was spent, so I got down after. After dinner I sat down on the couch just to chill out and uh, watch the golden black bachelor or something. I was, I'm stupid and uh, we'll knock that to that.
Speaker 2:My wife and daughter love it.
Speaker 1:I've actually done it, but I maybe watched the episodes too. It's good stuff. But I'm sitting there and in the behind me is all three of my boys and they're just like interacting with one another, make it fun on one another, laughing, and I just pulled out my tax. My wife was in there with him sitting at the table and I just go how awesome is this? And just to be in that moment, at that time, to have everybody in the home again, it's just. I mean, there's no better feeling in the world.
Speaker 1:So, it's super long story, man, but super grateful to have all my kids under one roof again and just being a family again.
Speaker 2:It's pretty cool. So, like my, my gift, I found, as a podcaster is I make my guests cry. You're going to make me cry, guy? Yeah, like I got it. My son Ryder. He's going to college in the fall and, uh, I am not ready for I'm ready but I'm like I mean you get a good episode of punky brooster or wonder years and I'm going to be a mess. A good AT&T commercial might tear up.
Speaker 1:It's tough, man. That drop off is something you and I can talk about. It. It's uh, it's. It's awesome in so many ways and it's so sad in so many ways, but like you just got to believe you did the best you can, man, you know, and and see him off. We, we actually had a funny story, like we said goodbye to my son and then it was just a weird goodbye. We were walking to the car. My wife and I are like we're not ready to say goodbye yet. So we, we called them again and we said, can you, can you just walk us to the car? So we walked us to the car and we said another goodbye and cried again. But it was uh, it was awesome, man. It's just you just got to believe you did the best you can. Let them go on their way.
Speaker 2:Wow, yeah, wow Well, um, that is fantastic. Well, I, what I'm most grateful for, um, a couple things. One, I uh, so we're recording in December this episode will come out in January sometime Um, and today I, today's episode for those that decide to listen to the whole thing is a powerful episode of my wife's journey and, uh, I'm so happy that she and my friend's wife were open to sharing their story about some health challenges. They went through COVID, um, so I'm grateful for that and I and I hope that, um, people were able to like listen to that episode and just be open minded. And again, the goal of that was not to convince my goal, just I wanted to give my wife a voice and, um, it was. I'm really grateful that we did that.
Speaker 2:I'm also grateful that I could watch my daughter put basketball game tonight. She has a nice, they got a, they got a varsity game against another team in town and I always kind of joke that I feel like my, my daughter's like a five foot four of Dennis Rodman, not like she can get all these rebounds. She just is in people's shit and just a psychotic defender and loves defense and she's a good three point shooter, but she values defense more than offense. And there's a loose ball. She's diving, she's scrapped, she doesn't get. Rarely does she get tired, I don't know how. And so I'm just I'm grateful because I get. When I watch her, I get like inspired, like God dang, like I love water. Sometimes I'm going to get water break. You love like pushing through it, so I'm grateful for that.
Speaker 1:That's awesome. Hey, just to give you some props, man. I know you and I texted earlier this week because I was wondering, hey, anything I need to know for the podcast to be ready. You know, overly ready, and you made mention of that, that podcast, really. So I'm excited to listen to it, man, because I know how much it means to you. So that's cool, man. It's cool that you get to do that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no, it's going to be. It's going to be fun. So well, all right, man. Well, I always like to go inside the huddle, so tell me who's. Who are the members inside the, the the your family huddle.
Speaker 1:We got your wife, three boys, yeah, three boys. I you know. The real quarterback, I think, is my wife.
Speaker 1:she might be the GM and president, yeah, I'm just the quarterback, but she's remarkable man We've been. We we met at Penn State my junior year. A little bit different background, she's an only child. I come from a kind of a split family, a little crazy craziness family. Hers is very simple and very, you know, structured. Just it's, just her. So you know everything goes to her. But we we met junior year at Penn State and been together ever since. So it's been. We got married in 2000. So it's we've been together for almost 30 years, which is really cool to think back on. And then we have my oldest that I talked about as Eden just turned it into.
Speaker 1:Just such a great man has a good heart, is empathetic, you know. Quick story on that. It was, you know I was driving him home and I was getting a little tired and I'm like, hey, I got to stop and just get and we had like an hour left. I'm like I got to get a cup of coffee just to just to do something to get me through this last hour. And he's just aware he took out his iPods and he just started talking to me and just keeping me engaged and offered to drive. But I don't trust his driving, especially in the rain. So it was just cool. It's just a cool moment for him to be that, aware that his dad was struggling a little bit. Let me help him out. So he's just great duties studying criminology. He wants to be an FBI agent, which I think is cool as shit, and he's and he's double majoring in psychology. So I just it's just awesome to see him just so happy and at his place right in college right now. Hopefully you get to see that too, man. When they start to just spread their wings and find themselves, it's just the coolest thing to see.
Speaker 1:Then I got my middle son, parker. He's, he's, he's my you know, crazy competitive athlete. You know, I mean, he's unbelievable Soccer. You know we're talking about playing in college and he's starting to see what's going on there and his options there. He's just an unbelievable competitor with just a great heart. He's he's the kid that you know I had. He punched a hole in the wall playing FIFA Xbox so he lost. He couldn't play FIFA Xbox until he repaired the hole. So we had a little little lesson in drywalling and spackling and painting and he couldn't do it until it looked like he didn't punch a hole in the wall.
Speaker 1:So good, good dad parenting moment there, but just just a special dude, empathetic, a little quieter, but just great personality, great sense of humor, just great, great, all around kid. And then and then my youngest Tanner. He's in eighth grade, he's 14. He's probably the nicest person I've ever met in my life. That's weird to say about your kid, but we have teachers, parent-teacher conferences being like I don't know what you've done to him, but that kid has a heart of gold. He is just the most empathetic, just well-rounded boy, usually a third.
Speaker 1:You're kind of like who knows what happens right. By the time you get to your third you're exhausted being a dad, but he makes it easy on us. He's just a cool, cool cat man, just easy going. He's into soccer, unbelievable soccer player. But I don't even think he knows how good he is. He doesn't really care because he's just so laid back. It's interesting. They all have super different personalities. Like I said, the mama bird kind of manages and corrals them all Just created a lot of empathy in my boys because she's been around forever. It's like when they get off the bus she's at home. She's been able to be with them throughout their upbringing which has made them into such well-rounded boys. I don't know. I could go on and on about the boys and the family, but I got three really cool dudes living with me and it's a super proud dad. Love it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, okay. Well, actually, before I go into some stuff, before you learn about how you grew up, you said Aiden was changed. For the parents that maybe haven't gone through that, like me, try to just describe a one or two areas of his personality that like what Aiden? Yeah, tell me what you saw.
Speaker 1:Well, the easiest one. He's a lot cleaner because he had to be, because he's in a small little dorm. He's just more attentive. He sees things differently. He kind of takes care and cleans this dorm which he's never done in his room here. We're hoping that transfers somewhat to what he's going to break. But just the maturity in his conversations, the curiosity in what we have going on and what we're doing, just there's a different level of engagement with him now that we've never had before and he's been awesome.
Speaker 1:When you send your kid off to college you're like all right, a lot of my friends are like, well, proof of life, like, send at least a proof of life text every once in a while. And we haven't had to deal with that at all. He sends those videos of parties he's at. They were playing a Penn State song that he heard at Beaver Stadium one time, at a bar which he's not supposed to be in, by the way and he's sending me a video. He's like yeah, look, penn State song. And it's like 12, 30 at night.
Speaker 1:I'm in bed. It's the first thing I wake up to in the morning and it's like you could tell he wants to stay engaged with us and I think he I don't know I haven't asked him this but and I don't know if he would tell me the truth anyway but I think he realizes just how good he has it here and just appreciates kind of his childhood a little bit and what he had. So I'm seeing that play out in his feedback to us Not intentional feedback, but feedback and then in case the bottom line, like he is so happy man, like to see your kid happy. Yeah, I mean, there is just. There's no better gift as a parent man.
Speaker 2:You're north of 230 dads. I've talked to you fifth season, which you'd have told me that I'd have a podcast for five years and like what? It's awesome, man, you know and I'm we're not stopping, this is it's. I get great, I get free therapy from every dad I talk to.
Speaker 2:And so I love that you. You said it just. It hits home, I think, for for you know, for many and I think you know, in the end it's easy to get wrapped up around the axle about we want our kid to be this or that, but in the end, like I've said multiple times that I got this advice, in the end we want good humans so they show up on time. Do they good? Are they a good pan shake? Are they kind to girls? Are they kind to boys? Are they? Yes, I mean they have good manners, like all the things that they learn, hopefully from us or people, mentors around them, but like we can't force them to do something, that it's their journey and once, once, you kind of surrender to that and just, ah, it's, it's a much more peaceful way to live life as a dad.
Speaker 1:Totally agree. Man Could not agree more. Yeah, you know, when you're early on in dads, you know it is you kind of live a little bit like you want your kid to live a little bit through you and what you did and what you missed out on. And you have this. The ego kind of takes over a little bit right and you want to make them into this like unbelievable soccer player and this and that, and it's like that's a good word, man, Surrender is a good word. I think you actually recommended that book for me, the surrender experiment which I picked up, by the way, which I would recommend to any dad or any, any person. So thanks for that recommendation. But that is that's it, man. If you just surrender and let them be who they're going to be and kind of support them along their way, and you're going to do okay, you're going to do okay, love it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, okay, take me back to quote share turn back time. If we turn back time like to talk about what was life like growing up for you and talk about the impact your parents had on you now that you're a dad.
Speaker 1:Man that's. I have been thinking a lot about that. I'm I'm writing this book and it's it's a lot. I had to go back there too and I had an interesting childhood.
Speaker 1:Man, like my parents broke up when I was super young, um, like when I was six, you know, so super young, didn't know what to make of it, and it wasn't like, it wasn't an easy breakup. You know, like my mom um ended up marrying another man or dating another man, and she went to the Philippines. So she didn't go to, like Ohio or or or another town over, and and she, she went to the Philippines with his staff sergeant in the Air Force. So, um, so I was left with my dad and my brother and it was just the, the three of us. And you know, my dad, he was, uh, he was still going to school. They had a super young, had us when my brother was um, he had my brother when he was 21 and had me when he was 23. So he was, he was going to school, he was working two or three jobs at the time, um, we'd go see him at Jimmy's market all the time and we'd get all the the meat that was um past the due date. So we'd get all that. You know, and um, you know, we just lived kind of the bro. My grandparents were a big part of my childhood, Um, and they're actually my mom's parents that was stayed in in Connecticut, um, so they helped my dad out a lot when my mom left, like my grandparents, and they're no longer with us, but they played a big role in my upbringing and even my great grandmother for a few years played a big role in my upbringing. So, um, without them I don't know if my dad would have been able to do it. Who knows where we'd be right now.
Speaker 1:But, um, so early on, um, my dad, he just wanted a new life and a new direction. So he moved us to Pennsylvania, outside Philadelphia, actually. Um, he just needed a new start. He had been remarried to my stepmother, um, who brought in two other kids. Um brought in my sister and my and my stepbrother Um, and you know my step sister was my age, so that was that was interesting, dynamic, family dynamic, right, we were in the same grade and same school and stuff, and we ended up learning to really love that and, and you know, use that in our favor. And she did it all. My friends. I did it, all her friends, all that stuff. So that was, that was fun throughout high school.
Speaker 1:But, um, and then my mom entered, re-entered my life four or five years later. You got to remember back then I was, you know, six to 12. And you know, when she was in the Philippines, it was letters. I sent letters to her and there wasn't a lot of communication. She ended up coming back with another fan. She had a family right, Her and her new husband. Um, they adopted two kids. They had two kids of their own and my brother and I were court ordered right to go out and spend a month with her in the summer and we would do that and we were, we became a little bit like babysitters or actually had all these little kids. So we kind of became babysitters and that was a.
Speaker 1:It was an interesting time in my life, man. It was just a really interesting time in my life. But, um, so my childhood was, was interesting, man. I've had to deal with, you know, abandonment, the feelings of abandonment, a lot that even show up as a 48 year old man from time to time. Um, it was. I've had to do a lot of work in dealing with that, that, those moments in my life. But then you know, I, um, my, my, my dad and stepmom worked their ass off to build a family, a mixed family, brady bunch of sorts, if you will. Um, in case, I was an asshole like I was, just I, I wanted nothing to do with it. I didn't deal with the trauma of my mom leaving. I looked back and just man, they tried so hard to just create this family dynamic and I was the guy at the middle kind of ruined it all, just, and it wasn't like I was. I don't think I'm a jerk, I just I was dealing with something and I didn't know how to deal with it. Right, yeah.
Speaker 1:That abandonment. So I just it was interesting man, it's really made me who I am and the man I am today and um, but you know, and we could talk a little bit more about that. But going back to high school was great for me. I had great friends, um, I, you know, just kind of was always out. You know, back in those days, you know, you're out until the lights, until it gets dark and you come in and you, you know, and I had a great group of friends and I, um, I was a really good soccer player, well, really good. Who knows, you know, I tell my kids I was really really good. But um, I, you know, I got into a division two school. I got injured my senior year so I got some.
Speaker 1:I got into a division two school, um, but it was just really small. It was a small school outside of the Poconos up in Philadelphia, east Drowsburg, and I was just homesick, I was done with soccer, I just didn't want to be there. So I ended up quitting and, uh, my dad didn't appreciate that very much. He was kind of like man, he just knew that that was a really good path for me and um, that didn't land well with him and we, we had some. We didn't really talk for a little while and then, unbeknownst to them, I transferred to Penn State, like on my own. I called, you know, back then you call the, the counselor, up, and I literally still had my acceptance as long as I went the second semester. So I transferred to Penn State and I mean, man, what a the best decision of my life man. I had four years of just. I have some of my best friendships there. We still go to the lake and the eight of us still go to the lake every year and act like college kids for, you know, a long weekend and I met my wife there, um, just had the best time of my life, man. And then, um, you know, then again it got into my career and work, history and so on and so forth.
Speaker 1:But what I've learned from my dad, um, you know, growing up, is just, you know, figure it out, man. Just, you got to just no one's going to figure it out for you, and sometimes you got to use the support you have around you. But like you got to figure this out, man, and he just he's did that. He did that his whole life and he got us from. You know, we had nothing growing up. I mean nothing Like I said we were.
Speaker 1:We were eating the expired meat from Jimmy's market, that where he's working, I mean it was, but we didn't care. Yeah, I didn't count, I didn't care, I didn't know, and uh, but he got us to. You know, he worked his way up to I don't know middle, whatever you want to call it, and a little bit more comfortable, and I just, I just always take that that and just grounded this. I think my dad is the, he just is who he is and he doesn't. He doesn't apologize for that, he doesn't, he's just, he's who he is. He's very grounded, um, which I've always kind of held very close to me, um, so I guess those two things I don't know if that's a that's enough for you, but yeah, that's that's my childhood.
Speaker 2:Um, where, tell me, are mom and dad still with us?
Speaker 1:Yes, yes, all my moms and dads are still with us. Yeah, my mom and dad are in. Uh, my mom and my dad and my step-mom are in, uh, outside Philadelphia still, I was supposed to go see them this weekend but they came down with COVID. So I guess COVID is still a thing, so we can't go out there, but they'll come out after the holidays and we'll spend our Christmas together and stuff, and then my mom lives in, uh, my real mom lives in um, indiana, with one of her other sons right now.
Speaker 2:Okay, yeah, wow, I just as you're saying that. I just, you know there's times are different, right, just like in every generation. But like the being away from my kids would be, I can't even imagine you know how hard that would have been for you or your mom, you know, and I'm sure there's probably times of her dealing with her own guilt, her own, like God does this, did I do this right, did I not? They come him back and then you know, and you open it up to like you know, a stepmom, and then meeting the family and like I can't even imagine Because my parents split when they were in college, yeah, so I went through that and we asked that my great stepbrothers I don't get on seeing very often, they're great, I love the great dudes. As you think about the, the journey of that, and you said your words go such an asshole like when did you realize you're the asshole? And tell me, have you ever like gone back to mom and step dad and stepmom? Like, hey guys, sorry about that, yeah, douche.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's. I wish it was sooner. You know, I wish I realized it sooner, but I had so much anger and blame and that I couldn't get through it. Man couldn't get through it till I was an adult, until I was a dad. And I start looking back and it's a funny moment. Actually I'm putting in my book, but it's a. It was on a flight home after a long week away traveling. I think it was a week, one of those week long trips. You drink way too much and you don't take care of yourself and your social battery is gone. You know, it was one of those trips and throughout the week I just overheard I wasn't even in the conversation, it's overheard these two guys talking about oh, you got a download that.
Speaker 1:Tony Robbins song I'm not your Guru or something like that was something. I think that was the message or that was the title, and I just kind of remembered it. So I'm like oh, let me check that out. I wonder why, you know, I kind of was connected to that.
Speaker 3:So I downloaded it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'm like I'll read it on one or I'll listen to it on or watch it on a plane, some some flight I have in the future. Well, long story short, my, my flight home got cancelled. I got put on another plane. I was in like row 36 B, you know, in between these two very grown men like in the middle seat, and I was like whatever, I just want to get home. You know what I mean. So I was sitting there in the middle, I just wanted to kind of close my eyes and go to sleep and I could know just kind of uncomfortable and and I I'm like let me watch this movie. You know, I don't know, let me, let me check it out. And this was, this was like five years ago, maybe, maybe maybe six years ago. And and the first 10 minutes of the movie I turn it on and I start like uncontrollably crying, like sobbing. Right, I don't know what's happening to me.
Speaker 1:Man, but the in the movie he talks about his mother being abusive right to him in a bunch of different ways and in the movie like she's right next to him and you could tell he like loves her and he's caring for her. And he talks about that and he just said you know I can't control what you, what happened, what she did. Like you know that was a woman that was kind of doing the best she could, she made her decisions. Like I can't control that, but I can tell you I'm not gonna. I I held on to that anger and that resentment and that blame for way too long and it didn't make me the man I wanted. To be right and I choose to love my mom for who she is today and Love the opportunity that I get to spend the next however many years with her and times I get to spend with her.
Speaker 1:But I'm gonna focus on that verse, that blame and angry man and In case I just I was that angry man for so long man and I just I blamed and that was the, the roadblock that was kind of Holding me back from even being a good dad. That that impacted me being a good dad, that impacted me being a good the. I think I was, I'm a good husband, but I like it. It could have been better, right, like it. It it brought me that anger. Holding on to that really, um, impacted me. So when you ask hey, when did you start to figure out. You're an asshole. I think I always knew, but like it took tody robbins on some video Isle 46 or 36 b and uh, funny story the dude next to me hit me on the leg and he's like you okay, man.
Speaker 1:And I'm like, yeah, it's been a long week, but, in case, when I tell you how I was, like uncontrollably crying and it was, it was, um, like I couldn't control it so I just let it go and it was just, it just was a moment of so much Build up, of being that man from that angry man, that angry six-year-old kid, for so long, yeah, um, and finally it just released and at that moment I'm just like I'm not being that anymore. And since then I've been able to just forgive my mom and have empathy. You mentioned it but, like, can you imagine a mom making the decision to, you know, marry, a staff sergeant in the air force, and again getting shipped to the Philippines away from her two kids? Like I can't. That's unfathomable to me.
Speaker 1:I know, I just I look at it from a place of empathy now and, um, I still don't have a great relationship with my mom, just because we just live into. But I have a relationship with her, yeah, and I love her and she's my mom, yeah, and um, you know the times that I do get with her, I try to, I try to make the most out of them. So it's just a better way for me to live and, uh, for me to hopefully teach my kids to choose empathy versus, you know, anger and grudges doesn't work.
Speaker 2:Love it, love it I. I wrote down ego, I wrote down forgiveness, I wrote down reconciliation. There's a great book I I think it's Well, I should say it's a book I don't want. I mean, I I got.
Speaker 2:I liked it because it's about the difference between forgiveness and reconciliation and the book talked about forgiveness takes one, reconciliation takes two, and once we forgive, you're actually forgiving you're. You're forgiving that person, but you don't need them to say anything to you. And I think once you get that negativity out of your body doesn't mean you're gonna be best friends that person, but you get rid of it Because all that anger does is impact you. And a lot of times when we go through this challenge and we like someone's pissed us off or are All carburent something, it's like they're not thinking about us. We think they are and the story we keep telling ourselves was that mother afer, they're probably, they probably didn't know we were this pissed, but we just keep getting on that loop and that stuck and we keep going through this shit show. And I love I hope there's a parent listening right now that hears that story, because it's super powerful dude.
Speaker 3:Hi, I'm Leslie Vickery, the CEO and founder of ClearEdge, a company dedicated to transforming the business of talent. Through our three lines of business ClearEdge, marketing, recruiting and rising that help organizations across the recruitment and HR tech sectors grow their brands and market share while building their teams with excellence and equity. I believe we were one of Casey's very first clients. He helped our sales and account teams really those people on the front lines of building and developing client relationships in so many ways. Here are a few. He helped us unlock the power of curiosity. For me it was a game changer. I was personally learning all about Ted based that's, tell, explain, describe, questioning and that really resonated with me. We also learned about unlocking the power of humility and unlocking the power of vulnerability. Casey taught us to be a team player, to embrace change, to stay positive. He is one of the most positive people I know. He believes that optimism, resilience and a sense of humor can go a long way in helping people achieve their goals and overcome obstacles.
Speaker 3:And I agree Casey's book when the Relationship, not the Deal it is a must read. Listen, whether you're looking for coaching and training or a powerful speaker or keynote, casey is one of the people I recommend, when talking to companies, the end result for us, at least as one of Casey's clients our own clients would literally commend our approach over all other companies, from the way we were prepared in advance of a call, to how we drove meetings, to how we follow up. It sounds really basic, I know, but let me tell you it is a standout approach that led to stronger relationships. I encourage you to learn more by going to kcjcoxcom. You have nothing to lose by having a conversation and a lot to gain. Now let's get back to Casey's podcast, the Quarterback Dadcast.
Speaker 2:You say your wife's name is Joy. Tell me how Joy I mean her journey, seeing you go through this and then, when you finally, like it, got through it like I'd love to hear a little bit about that, like how that impacted you and your relationship with her.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's interesting man, because Joey's only met my mom like a handful of times, Like she really doesn't know her that well, but she's seen some of the damage that happened to that six-year-old boy that she's had to deal with as a father and as her husband and stuff. But my wife is very forgiving. She can't really understand a lot of that stuff. She can't imagine leaving our kids. She can't even imagine that, and we're in a better situation.
Speaker 1:We have a better relationship. She didn't fall in love with a staff sergeant that just got shipped, so there's circumstances there, but she was very protective of me in that moment and very protective and she has supported me and has given me everything I've needed to come to that point of forgiveness and reconciliation and I can't thank her enough Because, in case of truth, I was told man that, like I said, when I say I wasn't the best husband, I just like that abandonment. And when you're abandoned and I've been through therapy you think everybody's going to abandon you Like that should be what. Everybody that you love you think they're going to abandon you.
Speaker 1:Wow, and first, in our relation, when we started off, there was a lot of just stupid shit that happened.
Speaker 1:Just because I would, I'd be like, oh, you're going to leave me, let me pull this wall and let me just avoid, let me avoid any discussion or kind of go into my little victim hole and be sorry for myself and it's that's not a great way to have a relationship with someone that you love.
Speaker 1:But I was so scared that six year old was so scared deep inside that she was going to leave, that I just, you know that's how I acted as her husband. So she's been so supportive man and just kind of has worked with me and met me where I needed to be as a part of my journey. And I'm just, I'm just super happy to be here now, man, because it's like it's such a relief to not have to deal with that and look at it as a victim anymore and as more like an empowered, like who I can be for her and for the boys and who I want to be in my life for the next four decades of my life. You know I still have that in front of me and it's within my control. So it's been, she's been awesome throughout the whole process, love it.
Speaker 2:What uh? Have you talked to your kids about this?
Speaker 1:Yeah, and snippets, you know, and snippets, and um, I kind of I try to teach them as I come through a realization. Um, I try to teach them that stuff because they don't, that's not their life, that's not their world. Like they have a, like one of the things and I hope this doesn't sound massagionistic anyway but like one of my goals in life was to have a mom that could get my kids off the bus and be that stability for them and that love for them. And then when they came in and had their afternoon snack, if, if I'm out, you know, doing whatever work in, and and you know she can check in with them and make sure they're okay and provide that safety that I never had. And then again, I hope that doesn't sound like.
Speaker 1:You know, when Joy and I met, it was hey, joe, well, you're staying home and I'm going to go to work, you know, and pounding my chest, it was not bad at all. Like Joy was an unbelievable consultant. Like we actually at one point talked about me staying home and her climate the corporate ladder but that's not what she wanted. Like she wanted to take care of her boys and be at home and provide that safe space for them. So it just worked out for us in our life and just with my career and what she wanted to do. But so I, so I tell you all that because they don't have that life.
Speaker 1:Like they don't have that. That abandonment, they don't have that. But so I try to be careful with not displacing my problems on them.
Speaker 2:But they are, they understand like they know the story, though.
Speaker 1:They totally know the story and you know we laugh at it and they, they, they, they bust, bust a little bit about stuff like that. So yeah, but we're an open book. I think you could probably tell from how I you'd keep it. There's not much I hide from them. It's awesome.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's just I feel like it's better for them to know than to not know you know, I think that's power of vulnerability right there, and it's, I mean, when we, when people connect to a story they have, that's how, I think, empathy is formed and we understand oh wow, that's maybe why that person's acting that way. It's like, oh, let me learn more of them, and you sprinkle some curiosity in there and you really get to. That's where relationships start forming. You're listening to smart lists.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, when they bust Sean Hayes' balls about his dad, oh my God, totally yeah. I hope your kids don't bust your balls that bad Like, it's not that bad, that is, yeah, they're like oh yeah, they went to the park.
Speaker 1:I think your dad never came back, yeah.
Speaker 2:Like it was. Yeah, that's, you know, those tires that your dad leaving.
Speaker 1:But I get a chuckle out of that because it's like you know it's. It's just I don't know and Sean deals with it the way he has to deal with it and stuff too. But I think we all have issues, man. I'm just glad that I got to the resolution that I've gotten to, because it's made me a better just a better man.
Speaker 2:Tell me what your dad did for a job, or jobs he was in.
Speaker 1:He did a little bit of everything, man, and then he kind of worked his way up. He was the head of training for SAP. Oh, wow, yeah, he did. And, as I said, he just he figured it out, man. He worked his way up and then he worked for UNISIS. At the end it was SAP you know he eventually retired from.
Speaker 1:But you know cool story about him, man, like so I told you I played soccer through high school and I was getting some some looks from colleges and stuff and and again back then. Now you and I can, you know you see a lot more dads at the soccer field at away games, at, like you know, four o'clock in the afternoon, like you see a lot more dads. Back then he didn't, and my dad went to every soccer game I seen in their season. Like he was the only dad there and he'd always kind of be off to the side but I'd always know where I am. I always hear his little. He wasn't loud but I could always hear him and that, just that, that meant the world for me, man. It just gave me that safety and that security to kind of to perform well in the field and just that confidence that you know that my dad was there and he that that was that just showed me how much belief he had in me to be different, to kind of change the cycle of our life. Like he started to change the cycle for our family by figuring it out and moving his way up and and get into a point and I think he had a lot of by show, by being there and and support me. It just it just showed like he had a lot of hope for me, which just meant it meant the world for me.
Speaker 1:And now I am literally, and I, you know, I worked for 25 years for an organization I traveled every week. That was. You know, we decided to live in Pittsburgh so I traveled every week but I always scheduled my travel around the boys games and being their soccer coach. I was every one of my boys soccer and helper for baseball and helper for basketball, like that was a priority for me. So I always and I and I don't I don't know of many games that I've missed and he taught me that man, like that is that is numero uno value, number one man, family. So he passed that down to me. Man, I take that, I take that super seriously.
Speaker 2:I, as you're saying that like that's something that's impactful for us too. And I'm, my wife and I talked about recently cause I I actually am we'll be traveling in Q one when this episode comes out and I'm going to miss one of my daughters, one of her games and I rarely miss stuff and I, I remember going to my kids and I said, hey, right, I'm really. I said I am so bummed I have to miss one of your games, but luckily, your games are streamed. I'm going to be watching it, so I'll be there in spirit. And she's like dad, it's not a big deal. I said, no, it is a big deal, honey, and I want to make sure you know that, like to me, like when grandpa Mike rest in peace, my dad passed away in 2021.
Speaker 2:He's he'd go to every one of my games and I remember my, his uncle, rico mom and everybody playing college football. I could throw the ball with that goddamn mountain when I, when I uh my red shirt freshman year at the Harvard of the West coast many people don't know that at Central Washington university, chris, yeah, even people at Central don't know that, but I do I was a third string quarterback warmups and we were in the quarter finals against a team called hardened Simmons, texas, and we took a charter flight at a Yakama Washington and all of a sudden I see freaking fat guy in little code. My dad is bored in charter. I'm like what he's like yeah, I'm coming to what I'm like awesome, I didn't even know it. I'm like that's freaking sweet. And my mind I'm like I wonder why he's, I wonder why he's going. I'm not gonna play. I'm 13 quarterback and I do the signals. And he's like he wanted to just watch me warm up. He wanted to watch me do signals. He thought he and he's like oh man, you played great today. I'm like dad, I didn't play. I said you were like 100% completion percentage and warm ups. Like he loved that. So my mom did too, but like my dad at the end, like he almost like bankrupt himself going to these shit hole towns.
Speaker 2:But I totally remember that and I want my kids know it's like just the same thing you just talked about is you know a day doesn't go by every morning when I actually we have a new puppy. So when the kids leave I'm like right, I drive safe Love. You guys have a great day. Go, go inspire somebody, go make a new friend and then I'll pick up our new dog, harley, and she's freaking like getting heavy now and I go all right, guys, harley, you want to say goodbye to the kids? And I'll pick up the dog and she just stares at them and it's like now the dog knows every morning she's like, hey, dad, pick me up on, say goodbye to Red.
Speaker 3:And it's like there's things.
Speaker 2:But those moments that we're creating, that we like these conversations, kind of help slow me down to think like, a they're always watching and B there's. These are memories we're creating. You know, and like what your dad did, and have you ever told him how impactful that was for you? Yeah, I have.
Speaker 1:My dad and I we didn't talk for a couple of years, like I said, like when I quit soccer, he just kind of he was so disappointed in me. Man, I think it was cause now that I can look back again with empathy and look at that moment, I think he just had such high hopes for me and he was. He was scared. He was scared that me quitting that might create this chain reaction of me, you know, going down the wrong path and then, unbeknownst to him again, I transferred to Penn State. You know he didn't talk to me the whole semester pretty much and he was driving me back to school.
Speaker 1:When I said, hey, we're going to Penn State, and he's like, excuse me, I go, yeah, I transferred to Penn State. He's like you know what? So it was, it was interesting moment. But like I've since then, like and there's a moment in writing this book, I've gotten to flashback to a lot of moments and there was a moment that he came up to Penn State my junior year, a parents weekend, and we were out on this porch it was more like a roof of my fraternity house and we were having a yingling pounder recyclable pounders like these big ones Delicious.
Speaker 1:Yeah, delicious right. And I just remember being on that roof with my dad and like that was the moment that we started the rest of our life together and he's been my guy man, he's, he's. I try to you know he's a little older now I just I try to give him everything that I wish he would have had, you know, back then, and then to see him treat my kids. It's almost and we haven't talked about this, but it's almost like he treats my kids like I think he wish he treated me, you know.
Speaker 2:I did that. I love that it's been really cool man.
Speaker 1:It's been really cool to see. So yeah, he's a special dude.
Speaker 2:So, as you think about life lessons and you think about your journey you're talking about, which has been, you know, a story of resilience and grit and adversity, but love and so many great things, if you think about like one or two or three, let's say, core values that you, that you had learned from your journey, and maybe joy learned from her journey, that were super impactful for you guys, as you raised your, your voice, tell me what comes to mind.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's interesting to ask that because I just recently retired and I've been able to do some some value work, like just really because I want the next chapter in my life, I want it to align with who I am as a person and really my core values and you know, as you're building your career and stuff, you don't always get to make those decisions right.
Speaker 1:You got to build a house and you got to support your family and so on and so forth and I was super, I was lucky in that space that I found the organization I found in the family. That was. That was a part of that. But you know, joy and I I actually went through and you know this through coaching. There's a bunch of values, exercises out there and stuff and I actually went through. And my number one is family. You know like that is, that is the core for me. So here in my boys all laugh when you know Aidan's home from school and just you know Aidan went into Parker's room the other day, which I don't think he I don't think he's ever been in Parker's room like throughout high school and he's in there doing derivative homework with him, which I mean it just, and to be in a moment case right now where I can actually like feel that moment and be proud and excited is so cool. Man, it's just such a gift. But family is a huge one that I hope to pass on to my kids and I have been passed on to me because again you go back to that. That kid, that kind of, was disruptive and just couldn't deal with his own abandonment, his own issues. That I disrupted what my parents were trying to create and I hope to be able to create that with my family. So that's the big one, you know, authenticity is a huge one for my family. I just, I just want my kids to be who they want to be and I don't want anybody to tell them who they have to be. And I, you know, I think Joy and I have worked hard to lay a foundation to where they can. They can do that, you know. They can go to the career they want and impact the people they want. So I, authenticity is a big one for all of us and my family. And growth is another one. Growth and development is a huge one for our family. Just constantly learning and developing and growing, that's like that's, you know, stepping outside your comfort zone.
Speaker 1:I got to see my, my, I got to see Parker give a. They had an end of the year soccer banquet last night and he's just a junior, so usually they do a little bit of a roasting of the coaches as they, as they exist, mostly a senior thing, but he was a captain when he was a junior. So he got to roast one of the coaches and it was funny. He's like hey, I'm here next year, so I'm going to take it easy on you, because I know I got to deal with you for a whole other year. But he just looks so confident up there and and so poised and he spoke so well. And then, you know, I coached him up a little bit before to say, hey, if you're going to transition to being genuine, make sure you pause there and make sure you have that moment where you can like really speak to the coach and tell them the impact. That don't mean a lot to him, especially if you're roasting them over here, like making sure you make that transition of genuine. It's any case, he did such a good job, man, so it's just cool, like it's cool to see them put themselves outside their comfort zone and grow and stuff.
Speaker 1:And then the last one is just just being, just being good human beings, just being nice, you know, just being nice to people. I just think we need. We need more of that this world, man. So those are the values that I've kind of learned throughout my childhood that I have incorporated. Joy and I are on the same page. I had her actually look at, look at them and I'm like, hey, are these like? I don't want values to be something I just, you know, talk about. I want them to be something that I embody, and she was able to validate that that's who we are and then agreed with me.
Speaker 1:So, yeah, those those are kind of what I'm hopefully passing on to my kiddos.
Speaker 2:Love it. I asked for one to three. I got four, which is better.
Speaker 3:Sorry, no, it's fantastic.
Speaker 1:It's fresh, so yeah.
Speaker 2:Family, authenticity, growth, mindset and be nice. That's it being nice. Why that's so unique this time of this year. It is funny how we we were taught to be nice, yet we get in these corporate jobs or we get on the road and we start flipping people off. Dipshit, or I can't believe accounting didn't like you think. They woke up saying man, I can't wait to ruin that, that invoice, I can't wait to have a consultant. Hate, my. You know, we're not waking up angry, angry in hope of the world. And then some, maybe some people are, but, like most people are thinking like, hey, I want to be good today, I want to be great, I want to do something positive. And it's funny.
Speaker 2:I don't know if I told you this, but I I'm going to talk about your book here in a second. But when I wrote mine, the very one of the very first lines I wrote in my book was about the power of the golden rule and be nice. And I told my son when he was 70, he asked hey, dad, what do you do for your job? And I couldn't say oh, you know, dad's in staff augmentation provides consulting services and software to value. Like what the shit does that mean, dad. So I said you know you'll understand this later.
Speaker 2:I hope that, like the simplistic way that dad works, he makes friends for living and my buddy's like dude, you can't say that he's going to be asking for 20s of recess. You can't Right and I'm like, but think about it. I go, if I'm nice to a friend and a friend needs help, I'm going to help them. But if a friend says, hey, can you help me what I lie to him. Or I say, hey, you know what, I don't think I'm the right friend, let me find you a new friend that can help you. So you're learning about expectations, listening, being a good friend. So that just like kind of that story hit me and so we kind of made my son's name joke about it to this day.
Speaker 2:But I love that. The power of being nice, that's never not going to be cool. It'll never be replaced by AI, it'll never be replaced by chat, gpt, totally. And it allows you to be yourself, because I always you know, dad, joke. I always say the number one reason that you should always be yourself is because everybody else is already taken.
Speaker 1:That's it. I love that man, I love that. Yeah, you can embody that with your kids. I mean, no better gift, man.
Speaker 2:Oh, 100% OK, If you thought about an area your dad game as you look back, or maybe current, you're still working on that. Maybe you know it's not quite as sharp as you want it. That might resonate Because we're talking a lot about the good side at the end here, but I always ask my guests to be hopefully vulnerable about hey, this is not my best and I'll maybe lead my witness. For me, it's patience as a competitive guy and sometimes I have to take a deep breath and I think this podcast has helped me immensely Because I feel like I'm going down dipship mode. I'm like, hey, dude, no one likes that. I said Casey, chill out. So for you, Chris, tell me what is an area your dad game that maybe you're always continuing to work on. That might not be your best sometimes.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think it's just presence, man, it's just being in the moment, like good buddy of mine used to be where your feet are and it's so funny, man, we all got our own lives going. I'm building this new business and I just recently retired. Right in this book I got all this stuff going on and I was walking with joy the other day, which I was actually proud of myself Because it was Monday morning and after 25 years of being incorporated, your body just goes into a rhythm and you're like you got to do, do, do, do, do, do. And when you're not, you get kind of anxious. So it was Monday morning and I was in a tournament soccer tournament since that, and joy was in a soccer tournament in Harrisburg.
Speaker 1:We haven't seen each other all weekend and I'm walking into Monday a little anxious, kind of that 25-year-old executive kind of shows up and well, what are you going to do today? You know mix shit happen. You've got to provide for your family, whatever. I'm just throwing out stuff myself and I'm like you know what you need to do. You need to go take a walk with your wife is what you need to do. So thank God she said yes.
Speaker 1:We went for our four-mile walk with our pups. And on the walk she goes hey, you never asked me about my doctor's appointment, and I'm like, and she deals with some rheumatoid arthritis stuff that we'll just have to deal with for most of our lives, and she was giving me an update from the doctor on how much medicine she take, blah, blah, blah. And just in that moment in case, I was like, ah man, why did I not ask you about that? Like that was so important.
Speaker 1:We were talking about it up to the point and I just got distracted and taken away with my own shit that I just I forgot to ask you and I apologize in a moment, but it's moments like that, but it's like, which she's awesome at? Like my kids have a test. She's like, hey, good luck in your test. I'm like, yeah, good luck in your test. And I had no idea they had a test, you know, and it's just being more there for them versus so wrapped up in me and what I have going on. I think that's a part of being human, but as a dad, I wish I could be more like hey, all right, let's what's going on outside and then let's worry about what's going on inside, and that's just something I'm always working on. Man Never great at it, but always something I'm working on.
Speaker 2:Well, I think first step is you put it out in the universe, you talk to out loud, and now it's taught in your subconscious and now other dads at home are like shit, I do the same thing. Well, and that's what's been fun of this journey everybody is. We're all flawed, nowhere near as perfect when you dial 911, my phone and Chris's phone does not ring. We're not as important as we once thought in corporate when we both left our corporate jobs. Believe it or not, k-force and Aston Carter stills in business. They haven't gone out of business. It's a miracle. I don't know how they did it survive without Jerusalem. I don't even think people K-Force knew I worked there anymore. I probably forgot who Was he, the gender.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you think about legacy and all. We're going to leave this Latin and it's like what? There's no legacy. But next man up, next person up.
Speaker 2:Totally OK, so I'd love to again. Thanks, marcy, for introducing us. I feel like I've known you in my frickin' forever dude. I love this. What Tell us about what you're doing now? You got a book you're writing and you're in coaching now, which I love, so talk about a little bit about what you're up to.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I've been blessed. One of the great things Aston Carter did for us is directors and executives assign us to an executive coach. So I've had probably for the last 15 years I've had an executive coach in my life which has just been I mean awesome.
Speaker 1:Just for dealing with all that unpacking that six-year-old and just moving up my career path and balancing being a dad and husband and the different roles I play in my life was just awesome. So the last about probably almost 10 years I've had the same person and he's just been. He's turned into one of my great friends, someone I trust with everything. He knows about me, he knows about you, he's super invested in me and my life and when I left he called me up shortly after and said let's go into business together. And I said, hell, yeah, this is what I want to do with you. I want to learn from you. I want to grow with you. I think we could do and we're so aligned with the stuff we want to do. You actually helped me, man. We were on a call and you're like I told you yeah, I mean until we want to get in the podcast, and you're like wait, you just said a swear word.
Speaker 1:Want to. And here, man, I got my mic now. Right, we are doing it, man. I've built that kind of like a script. We're going to introduce ourselves for the first one, but we are doing it just so you know, love it, let's do that early next year, so we're getting into that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we started up an executive coaching and consulting company, which has been really fun. We're having some great conversations with customers and stuff, and it's something I'm so passionate about because it had a drastic impact on me and my life as an executive. And that balance you talk about, right, that like as an executive, you just want to get stuff done and you tend to sometimes not be nice. It's just that balance. And then I decided to write a book. Man, I just, you know, I decided to write a book and just about in the book, the concept is about reclaiming your ideal self, like who you really want to be in this world and who you want to be in this life. And it's kind of like my journey in figuring out kind of who I was and who I had to be along the path and then to where I am now and the life I'm living now, which has been a lot of fun man. So yeah, a little bit of everything going on and the book's going to come out next year, we think.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so I have like probably second part of next year, ok.
Speaker 2:Probably second part of next year. Well, we'll make sure we share it with everybody when the book comes out. And I think your journey of life, the adversity, the grit, the resilience, the honesty, the empathy, the love I think there's so much gold in this book that I think will impact shit tons of people. Right, berm? And I mean I wrote a book mainly to prove that football guys can't put sentences together. We're not all idiots, you know. That's right, it's a great one, yeah, but I mean Joe can say it but a lot of it just about the habit of writing.
Speaker 2:Shout out to Bobby Robinson, if you're listening. She was a content design manager at AT&T and she was a writer. And I remember asking her like I want to write a book. She says then start writing. And Lily, that was like one of the best pieces of advice I got. She said just write every day. And so when I left corporate from 9 to 1130, for four months I wrote every day. Some days I thought it was fantastic, it sucked. Days I sucked, maybe it was better than I thought, but just like anything, it's habits. So I'm excited for you. It's really cool, and so if people want to learn more about you, they want to connect with you. They want to hear about your coaching and hopefully have you positively impact your organizations. Tell me the best way I can connect you to them.
Speaker 1:Yeah, probably just LinkedIn. Right, that's the gold mine for that stuff. We have a website out there. It's a long one, but you can get it on my LinkedIn QuentinWeissExecutiveCoachingcom. But yeah, everything's on my LinkedIn. It's pretty updated, so that's probably the best way to reach me.
Speaker 2:Cool. I will say this Before we go to light and run everybody what's cool about? When Chris and I met, he and I both came from an industry that's very, very competitive, but we're both doing the same thing and we're both supporting each other, and so I would encourage you to your quote unquote competitors don't need to be your nemesis. I would want to be coached by you. I think you're a frickin' fantastic human. It's like the energy, how you show up, and I hope you guys kill it and do fantastic work, because I think you've got stories to share and I think you're going to really, really impact a lot of people in a great way. Well, hey, man.
Speaker 1:Thank you, kase. We got introduced by somebody else that I got introduced by somebody else from and you were gracious man. I remember you gave me a text that said hey, man, you had no reason to meet with me, like no, and other than what Marcy's saying hey, you got to meet with this guy and I felt like we hit it off on that call and just you saying, hey, man, people help me and I want to be able to pay it forward. I can't thank you enough, man, in all aspects this, the podcast, the book, and it just shows you incorporate. You're giving the belief that, hey, that competition are your enemy and it's within these four walls, but when you get outside of that, you're like, oh my gosh, people do want to help you and to be able to pay that forward. It's powerful man. So I want to thank you from Bob Mar. No, I appreciate that.
Speaker 2:I call it a boomerang mindset. I throw boomerangs every day but I don't keep score. But I know that you'll do the same for someone I'm confident of that.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I can't wait.
Speaker 2:And you'll remember this. Ok, lightning round. This is where I go random on you. I show the negative impacts of taking too many hits not bong hits, but football hits in college. Your job is to answer them as quickly as you can and my job is try to get a giggle at you. Are you ready, Ready? Ok, True or false. You turned down Ted Lasso so Jason Sadegas could take it. True.
Speaker 1:I got to get a giggle on you.
Speaker 2:Damn it. Damn it. Ok, true or false, you're wearing shingards right now, false I?
Speaker 1:am. I do like that secure feeling though.
Speaker 2:Yeah, true or false, I'm wearing a cup right now. True you are, safety never takes a holiday. I've learned that that's right. If I was to come to your house for dinner tonight, what would we have?
Speaker 1:Tonight is burrito night, mm Burrito night, and we have plant-based eaters, we have meaty, so it's a multitude of different ingredients in our burritos. But, yeah, burrito night tonight.
Speaker 2:OK, dave, you ever remember Saturday Night Live? Will Sherry O'Terry and Will Ferrell skit the cheerleaders.
Speaker 1:Yes, I do remember that, yes.
Speaker 2:This is so random I can't believe I'm going to say this, but I'm going to say anyways. There's a song where they would say tacos, burritos. What's coming out of my speedo? We got crab legs. Whenever I think of burrito, that song gets in my head. So now to share with the world. And so why I'm sharing it later on makes no sense, but we're going to continue. If I was to go on your phone right now, what would be the one song that everyone would be like? What you listen to? That no way. The Rose by Bette Middler. Bette Middler.
Speaker 1:Bette, middler and Rose from that. What's that movie? That's so sad. The Best Friends is Dine Again, oh Drown.
Speaker 2:What the hell when they drive off the cliff.
Speaker 1:No, that's El Thelma Louise. Oh yeah, the Bette Middler, the Rose. It's like I forget it's going to drive, see, I don't know, I watch it and then I forget about it. But the Rose by Bette Middler, it's a sad and it goes. It's a good one, man.
Speaker 2:Listen to the words Shout out to Bette Middler there we go she might be the first Bette Middler reference in five years of the podcast. Congratulations, I should get you a t-shirt.
Speaker 1:You know, I just crashed because I was just driving up, I was just had like a long drive and I was like, oh the road, how great is that? Let me listen to that. It actually reminds me of my childhood. My dad, my brother and I used to sit around with some of the record player and some reason Bette was on and it was. It made its mark.
Speaker 2:Love it. Yeah, If you were to go on vacation right now. Just you enjoy where you're going.
Speaker 1:We'd go back to where we were on our honeymoon, which is St Bart's.
Speaker 2:Yeah, special place. Tell me the last book you read.
Speaker 1:Last book I read was Amongst Guide to Happiness. I have it right here, ok.
Speaker 2:Favorite comedy movie ever seen. Comedy movie Step Brothers Solid. Yeah, If you were to, there was to be a book written about your life. Told me the title.
Speaker 1:Well, I'm actually writing it now. You know so, but I don't want to do that title. Let's see the book Finding Happiness.
Speaker 2:OK, now Finding Happiness Christopher is crushing it. It's in every airport, it's in every Barnes and Noble, amazon's, like sold out. They can't keep up. And then Hollywood found out about it. So now they're going to make a movie out of it, and you are now the casting director. I need to know who's going to star Chris Weiss in this fantastic new movie, finding Happiness man.
Speaker 1:That's a good question yeah, I like Matt Damon. He's a cool dude. He seems like a cool dude.
Speaker 2:Matt ED. He's a fantastic guy.
Speaker 1:He just seems like a cool dude. You know what I mean. Like I think, yeah, I think Matt Damon's got to be the guy Matt.
Speaker 2:ED, yeah, ok, and last question Tell me two words that describe joy, oh, patient and loving. Boom Lighting round is over. I think I lose. I laugh first at my own joke, which is typical dad style. How I roll. Yes, because that's guaranteed. My jokes are always going to be funny, because at least I'll laugh at them If I, as long as I laugh, it doesn't matter, it's a good rule.
Speaker 2:I want to thank you so much for your time, dude. It's been fantastic and you know yeah, I know this will not be the last time we'll be speaking. I hope that your story has inspired somebody about maybe what you've gone through, that what's possible to get through, and I hope that you people reach out to you to learn more about coaching and be able to obviously follow your book when it comes out. I want to thank Latitude Sica for your continued support and I think we might be looking for some additional sponsors in 2024. So please, if you're interested in being a part of the quarterback DAC, ask, reach out to me on LinkedIn. But again, thank you so much, brother Marcy. Thank you for connecting us and I hope you have a fantastic pressure day, brother. Thanks, keith.
Speaker 1:Bye buddy.