Equipping Parents: Raising Children Rooted in Christian Values w/ Lee Ann Mancini

Discover the roadmap to nurturing your child's faith in a world that often seems to run counter to Christian values, as award-winning author and podcast host Lee Ann Mancini joins us for a deep dive into the heart of spiritual parenting. Facing a stark reality where the faith of our youth is wavering, we arm you with the strategies and encouragement needed to be the spiritual leader your family seeks. This episode is a heartfelt conversation, brimming with practical advice, to bolster your efforts in fostering a genuine relationship with God among your children.

Navigating the complexities of public education and a society teeming with diverse worldviews, we uncover the indispensable role parents play in crafting a durable spiritual foundation for their kids. It's about being authentic practitioners of faith, not seeking perfection but striving to model a life rooted in prayer and biblical principles. Sharing tips straight from the trenches, we discuss how to transform playtime into learning about God's love and how to maintain open conversations that guide older children toward their own personal faith journey.

To wrap up, Lee Ann imparts wisdom from her book "Raising Kids to Follow Christ," offering you a treasure trove of guidance in leading your children down a path of righteousness. As you tune in, you'll be inspired to embrace your calling as a modern-day spiritual warrior, shaping not only your household but influencing the larger tapestry of our churches and communities. Join us in this mission, and together, let's raise a generation that is steadfast in love and faith.

Book: Raising Kids to Follow Christ
Website: raisingchristiankids.com
Bible: NIV - Spirit of the Reformation Study Bible
Favorite App/Website: Logos Bible Software

Transcript

Lee Ann Mancini: 0:00

And he said to the parents imagine yourself sitting at the heavenly banquet table and you're looking around and heaven is beautiful and God is there, jesus is there, and your mother and your father are there, your aunt and uncle, cousins, family, friends, and you're looking around the table, but you don't see your children.

Ellen Krause: 0:27

Welcome back to the Coffee and Bible Time podcast. For those that may be listening for the first time, our podcast is an offshoot from our main platform, youtube. Our channel is called Coffee and Bible Time, where our goal is to help people delight in God's word and thrive in Christian living is to help people delight in God's word and thrive in Christian living. We also have a website and storefront with Bible studies, prayer journals, courses and more. As Christian values face increasing challenges in our world today, parents often worry about how to instill a strong spiritual foundation in their children. In today's episode, we have invited Lee Ann Mancini, author of the new book Raising Kids to Follow Christ Instilling a Lifelong Trust in God, to talk with us about how to teach and guide children to become effective disciples who want to follow Christ and live by his word. Without guidance in building a firm foundation for our children, they may struggle to understand what is truly important in life, potentially leading them away from their faith and Christian values. So join us as Leanne and I discuss incorporating strategies into our parenting for the next generation to anchor their lives in Jesus for now and eternity.

Ellen Krause: 1:49

Lee Ann Mancini hosts the award-winning podcast Raising Christian Kids. She shares expert godly advice, biblically-based wisdom and insightful tools for parenting children to bring them closer to Jesus. Leanne is also an award-winning Christian children's author and executive producer of the animated series Sea Kids. Leanne is an adjunct professor at South Florida Bible College and Theological Seminary. She received her BA in Religious Studies from Regent University, her master's degree in Christian and Classical Studies and Biblical Theological Studies from Knox Theological Seminary and a master's in Christian Studies from Trinity Evangelical Divinity School, right here, close to where I'm located. Leanne and her husband, Guy, have two adult children and make their home in South Florida. Please welcome Lee Ann.

Lee Ann Mancini: 2:54

Thank you for having me, Ellen. Oh, you could have left out all those credentials. I never know what bio anyone's going to use, but yeah, no, I'm so happy to be on your show. Thank you.

Ellen Krause: 3:04

Well, I'm delighted to have you here. As a mom myself, of course, this is one of my very most favorite topics and, for Christian parents, our children, as you say in the book, are the most valuable gifts that God has given us, and wanting our kids to know Jesus is one of our highest priorities in life. Yet, based on some of the statistics that you quote in your book, this just doesn't seem like it's happening.

Ellen Krause: 3:35

So, give our listeners some insight into what you found when you were doing that research, to understand the statistics and how that's impacting children as they're being raised.

Lee Ann Mancini: 3:53

Well, thank you, Ellen. I started researching about five years ago for this book and at that time, 40% of children in middle school were walking away from their faith and it was, I believe, 65% in high school and college. So I started researching why is this happening? What can we do? I felt the call from the Lord to do this because I love to research and I love to teach and I love to share information. And then I started finding this information and sharing it on the podcast, the Raising Christian Kids podcast.

Lee Ann Mancini: 4:27

Well, let's go forward now to where we are. And recently George Barna wrote a book called Raising Spiritual Champions, and in their research they found that teenagers between the ages of 13 to 14 from Christian homes that 70% of them don't believe Satan exists or he's real, 84% believe we're not born into sin and need a Savior and 90% believe there's no such thing as absolute moral truth. And then parents, most Christian parents, really only have a 2% biblical worldview, a real biblical worldview. And then I mean, after I read these statistics, I was like in tears when I heard that the children's pastors 53% believe in the possibility of reincarnation, possibility of reincarnation, 63% believe in that there's no absolute moral truth. Now these are children's Christian pastors, and this one is when I really started. The tears started coming rolling out of my eyes because I was just so shocked. 50% believe that Jesus possibly sinned while he was on earth.

Ellen Krause: 5:43

Oh no.

Lee Ann Mancini: 5:44

In his human form. So George Barna says in his book also that we're on the precipice of irreversible destruction. So now I can understand why God had me doing this research and my book came out like three months after his book. And my book just really says, hey, yeah, we have a problem, but there's so much we can do and we can do it organically, day by day, lovingly, to transform our homes and to help our children have a worldview that adheres to biblical principles and who will love and adore Jesus all of their life.

Ellen Krause: 6:24

Who love and adore Jesus all of their life, absolutely. One of the things that you mentioned was that parents need to be strong spiritual leaders, and it's interesting that the research there indicating so many things that are not consistent with what core Christian values are. I really find it so interesting that your book then is able to address some of these things. Is that kind of why you consider it sort of an urgent read for Christian parents today?

Lee Ann Mancini: 7:01

Yes. Well, in my research I also found that there's a lot of parents out there who maybe they weren't churched. You know they don't understand. You know the Word of God and they need help. They want to raise their children, but they also need to learn. You know God's Word. So this book not only helps parents raise their children well, but it helps to educate the parents as well as to what you know God's Word says.

Lee Ann Mancini: 7:28

A lot of parents will rely on Proverbs 20, train them up in the way they should go, and they will not depart from that. Well, we know that that's not a promise, but we understand that in Deuteronomy 6, verses 4 through 9, the Shema is the directives given to parents to raise their children, and it says when they rise up, when they walk along the path, when they lie down, impress these biblical directives. Impress means to mold, to brand, to mark, to live out, and so the book gives you a lot of examples of how to organically, day by day, live out your life for Christ and let your children see you doing that. Because you know more is caught than taught and it just really helps parents and ministry leaders and grandparents raise their children to love and adore Christ as if he is living in their home, right there, because that's how we're supposed to be living Absolutely.

Ellen Krause: 8:33

And I want to talk about. You had mentioned that planting seeds from the time they're in the womb to three years old, and that really struck me because I feel like, at least from my own self, some of the things that I read that you had recommended in there, I was doing but I didn't realize I could be so much more intentional about it. So tell us about how you can even impact your children at that very young age.

Lee Ann Mancini: 9:08

Well, thank you, Ellen. God's Word says in Psalm 7:86, teach even to the children yet to be born. And Psalm 5:16 says yet you desired faithfulness. And even in the womb you taught me wisdom in that secret place. So what does that mean? Well, in researching, I found that at 18 weeks of pregnancy, the fetus can hear sounds.

Lee Ann Mancini: 9:35

So you could simply volunteer at your church nursery. First of all, they need volunteers, and let your baby hear the children singing Jesus loves me. This I know, and continue to volunteer even after they're born. Bring them with you, let them hear the sounds of singing praises to Jesus and talks about Jesus, and on their first day when they attend, there'll be no tears because they're used to that environment. So that's just something you can do. You know very, very early. Then I talk about you're feeding your infant. You know they scream when they're hungry right, we remember those days. They scream when they're hungry. Well, as soon as you put the bottle in their mouth, they start cooing.

Lee Ann Mancini: 10:17

Simply say Johnny, Jesus loves you, he loves Johnny. What you're doing is you're connecting that name of Jesus with his needs being met. Or you have a six-month-old looking in the mirror and they're giggling and they're happy looking at their reflection. You can say Samantha, Jesus loves Samantha, Samantha's beautiful and Jesus loves Samantha. Now you're connecting the name of Jesus with their happy emotions and then they're a toddler. Instead of saying let's take a nap, say let's take a Sabbath's rest, and then you go and you say a prayer to Jesus and you go to sleep. Well, they don't understand the true meaning of Sabbath. But what you're doing at that time is you're building a building of vocabulary and a category in their mind for the term Sabbath. So when you start talking about the real meaning of Sabbath between ages four and seven, you're planting seeds into rich soil to grow deep roots.

Lee Ann Mancini: 11:18

There's just so much we can do. The research has indicated that we never know when a child really grasps a biblical concept. So we should use the words sin, salvation, redemption. Use those biblical words, those large words, and make sure your child this is so important understands every word of the Bible verse that they're memorizing. You know what does it mean? Hallowed be thy name. You know honor your father. What does honor mean? Because these children will repeat these verses but they may not know what each word means. So there's just so much we can do. We can have fun doing it also with our children. There's a lot of suggestions in the book of fun ways to teach the Word of God.

Ellen Krause: 12:07

And that's truly, I think, one of the wonderful aspects of your book. Are these just practical things that parents can do. One of the things that you mentioned was this scare that you had with an image that Jonathan Edwards, the North American revivalist preacher from the 1700s, used. Tell us about that and how it impacted you.

Lee Ann Mancini: 12:36

Well, when I was researching the book, I probably read over 200 parenting books. I read everything I could get on biblical parenting or children's spiritual formation, and I even went back into some of the older books and I found a quote from Jonathan Edwards, as you said, as a 1700 revivalist preacher for the first big revival, and he wanted to scare parents. And he said to the parents and I don't believe in scaring parents, but you'll get the point of this when you hear the story of where he was going with this and he said to the parents imagine yourself sitting at the heavenly banquet table and you're looking around and heaven is beautiful and God is there, Jesus is there, and your mother and your father are there, your aunt and uncle, cousins, family, but not your kids. You don't see them sitting at that heavenly banquet table and you know where they are if they're not there. And when I read that it just shook me to the core because I never thought about my children never being in heaven with me.

Lee Ann Mancini: 13:45

And so I think, when you think about what the end result could be, it just motivates you to do all you can right now to help teach your children to have that lifelong faith and trust in God. We do the best we can. You know I say we're parenting practitioners. There's no perfect parent, but we do the best we can with what we're giving and it's never too early and it's never too late. So I don't want parents to feel guilty if they haven't done a lot of the things that are suggested in my book, because I didn't do half of them, or more than half of them probably, but you know it. Just you do the best you can with the knowledge you're given.

Ellen Krause: 14:27

Yes, absolutely, and you also talk about the role of prayer, and you know obviously this is something you know the actual work of conversion can only be done by the power of the Holy Spirit. Tell us about prayer and its impact and sort of also allowing God to work in this process.

Lee Ann Mancini: 14:52

Well, I think prayer is our most effective and important tool.

Lee Ann Mancini: 14:56

It connects us to the source.

Lee Ann Mancini: 14:58

When our children see us praying all the time, they will want to pray, and I try to teach the children or I taught my children when they were young we have to have a relationship with God. He needs to know that we love him, we adore him and we can go to him for whatever our needs are, we can go to him and give thanks. Needs are, we can go to him and give thanks. Well, you can't call him on a cell phone, you can't send him an email, you can't write him a letter, but you can pray to him and he hears our prayers, and so prayer is the most impactful tool we have to help transform our children's hearts and minds and for God to guide us on how to do that. So I have a lot of examples in the book of parents how they can answer their children's questions and how they can pray with their children, giving them the words to say, because a lot of parents are unchurched and they're not sure how to do any of this, and so this book will really help them.

Ellen Krause: 15:58

I'd love that. That's so important and really something I guess that I hadn't thought through that there could be a lot of people reading this book that don't know how to do it, so that extreme level of practicality is so incredibly helpful. Well, let's move on to where our children are school age now and, with some of them, in the public school system. What is your advice to parents who are struggling with what's being taught in the school system?

Lee Ann Mancini: 16:37

Yes, I highly suggest homeschool or Christian school. But I understand in the book I say that some people can't do that. You know, 80% of our children attend a public school. So the parents have to just be doubly, have to double down and be diligent in understanding what is being taught in the classroom and, if possible, ask for the lessons ahead of time. If you can find out, you know what they're going to learn, and sit down with your children and prepare them Right away. We need our children to understand that there's two worldviews.

Ellen Krause: 17:11

There's our biblical worldview that we believe Jesus and holy spirit and his word, and then the other worldview is man's worldview and all the other religions and what they believe why do you think, leanne, that having a strong spiritual foundation is so important to fight against the anti-Christian culture, whether the child is at school or somewhere else doing other activities?

Lee Ann Mancini: 18:37

Well, you know, our spiritual foundation is hopefully anchored in Christ, in Jesus, and the knowledge we gain from his word and understanding the world around us can help us learn how to navigate an evil world and stay strong in our faith. A spiritual foundation is everything you know, Lisa Miller, I had her on my show. Dr Lisa Miller and the scientists have indicated that 28% I believe it's 28% of our DNA, our DNA that determines our eye color, our hair color 28% of our DNA is spiritual. So where does our spiritual foundation or formation or ideas lie With what we've been taught to believe, to be true and what works? You know, a worldview in a child, a worldview starts to formulate around 15 months of age and is solidified by 13 years of age, age and is solidified by 13 years of age. And a worldview has to answer four questions to be logical and consistent and dependable and true. It has to answer where do we come from Morality, how do I determine between right and wrong, A purpose, why am I here? And destiny, what happens when I die? And so, when you teach your children, young, what a worldview is, what your worldview is as a Christian family, what your spiritual formation is as connected to the Word of God and to Jesus. This will anchor them for the rest of their lives and help them when they go out into this ever-increasing anti-Christian humanistic culture that we see ourselves living in and pray for revival. God can change anything.

Lee Ann Mancini: 20:43

Let me just say also that you know God's Word says that our children are arrows in our quiver. Well, what is an arrow used for? First of all, it has to be made precise, it has to be perfect, and that arrow is aimed to kill the enemy. And our children are our future. You know the four pillars of society academia, the government, the media and the church. We need to have Christians placed in these four pillars of society, and so this is what we have to do as parents. I kind of like to say we're like the modern day, Rosie Riveter. Remember Rosie Riveter from World War II? Remember Rosie Riveter from World War II? The only way they could win World War II was calling the parents and asking them to roll up their sleeves and get to work and help fight the war. That's what we're doing. We're all Esthers, Okay. We're called for a time such as this to equip our children, and to equip them well, because it's about their salvation and the preservation of our faith.

Ellen Krause: 22:03

Yes, absolutely. And for many parents who have done their best and poured into their kids, like you've said, and then they find that their kids do go off on some other tangent. And what advice do you have to those parents? I know I feel like I always come back to God's timing and it seems like there's a time in a young adult's life where they're, you know, transferring this ownership from being taught to owning it themselves. Tell us about how all of that works and what encouragement you can give to parents.

Lee Ann Mancini: 22:39

Well, I like to say please don't let, don't have any guilt that you haven't done what you thought you should have done, because I didn't do half the stuff that's in this book when I was raising my children and they're both believers. And I like to give the example. Erwin Lutzer talks about the Egyptian tombs, where they found 4,000-year-old seeds in these tombs and they took the seeds and they planted them into soil and they gave them sunshine and water and they grew. You know, god's word says it never returns void. And Joel, he talks about how he can restore with the locust heavy.

Lee Ann Mancini: 23:21

So say you have a teenager now and he's just mom, you know, I don't want to go to church, I don't think we need to go to church, I don't believe in it or whatever it may be. You know, you simply sit down and you say look, son, we haven't been doing some of the things that we should be doing and we're going to sit down and write a family mission statement right now. We're going to work on that together. You're going to help us, and we're also going to write a disciplinary contract and set out what we expect you to obey and what the consequences are if you don't obey and if they're involved in these contracts, they're more likely to adhere to the stipulations laid out because they were involved. And then you say to them and here's the three reasons we're doing this, and these are three reasons we're doing this. And these are three reasons teenagers cannot argue with. We're doing this because we have to, you know, adhere to what God has called us to do, and he's going to be holding us accountable as parents. We're doing this because we love you and we're doing this because we want to protect you. And those are three things that teenagers cannot push back upon. We're not saying we're doing this because we want to protect you. And those are three things that teenagers cannot push back upon. We're not saying we're doing this because I'm the parent, you're the child and this is how it's going to go down. That doesn't work, and lecturing teenagers doesn't work. And what parents have to understand too.

Lee Ann Mancini: 24:40

I have like almost two chapters. I have two chapters of almost well, there's two chapters about disciplining and, once you have a disciplined child, how you can work beyond that to incorporate the values you want to incorporate in your family. But here's the thing Children really don't have rights except for food, shelter, clothing, you know and maybe, of course, love, but I'm just saying basic rights. Everything they have after that is privileges such as getting the keys to use the car, having a cell phone, using a computer, going out with their friends. Those are all privileges. And you will see how fast they turn around when they realize that they don't hear to the stipulations and they don't obey, and the consequences are they lose their privileges. They get the message right away. It works.

Ellen Krause: 25:38

Yeah, it sure does. Are there some specific Bible characters whose parents you would say adhered to the commandments of Deuteronomy 6, 4 through 9?

Lee Ann Mancini: 25:52

Yes. So I'd like to say what does Paul, Timothy, Saul, Jeremiah, David, what do they all have in common? If you read in the Bible, they were taught from infancy. They were taught from when they were very young, and so that's why it makes the teenagers a lot easier if you start early and again, it's never too late. We want to make sure people understand that it's never too late. But these men, the Lord was the anchor to their souls from the very beginning, because their parents were diligent to teach them that's so amazing that it can have such a profound impact from such a very, very young age.

Ellen Krause: 26:41

And at the same time, boy, when they're that young they're not talking back to you. You can really tell them everything you want to say. Well, Lee Ann, as we start to kind of wrap things up here, your book Raising Kids to Follow Christ takes a deep dive into scripture. It also is filled with practical advice for the parents that are out there listening. What's your biggest advice for them? Or even caregivers right, there may be some grandparents that have a profound role in a child's life.

Lee Ann Mancini: 27:26

Well, for little ones, I think what's important is their playtime, because that's where children learn. Look at the area in which they play their bedroom or their playroom and does it look more like Destiny Land or Disneyland? Make sure you have an area where they can play biblical Legos. There's biblical Legos out there, fruits of the Spirit, puzzles and games and toys. Another area where they can simply sit in a beanbag chair and read their Christian children's books and have Christian music playing softly in the background while they're playing. Have an area where they can play dress-up and, instead of Disney costumes, have biblical costumes and have them have an area where they can, instead of tea party, have practicing communion. Have a where they can practice church and preaching to their toys and teaching their toy to their toys.

Lee Ann Mancini: 28:22

There's so much we can do and we can do it and it's fun and it's exciting and got, and in the book I have tons of suggestions like that. And then um, for the older children, just simply remember not to lecture and if you listen to the small stuff now, they will tell you the big stuff later. So always have that line of communication open, not being so judgmental, but be like a coach, walking alongside them, encouraging them and teaching them and coaching them. There's just so much we can do. We just have to do it.

Ellen Krause: 28:59

Yes, I think the intentionality and, like you said, just have to do it is the key. Well, Lee Ann, you offer so much more that people can delve into in your book. How can people find out more information about you and the book as well?

Lee Ann Mancini: 29:16

Oh, thank you. Well, my website, raisingchristiankidscom. We have a ton of free resources that parents can print, and we also have on the podcast. We have a section called Tips from the Experts, where we have experts 15 minutes. They share their tips. We have a section of episodes that deal just with discipline and a section that deals just with apologetics.

Lee Ann Mancini: 29:46

As you know, in the book I have a whole chapter on apologetics because we want to teach our children how to defend their faith in a loving manner also, and they need to have a heart transformation. They need to believe because they believe it to be true, not because they're told it's true. We don't want to be little pharisaical laws. We want them to have a heart transformation. But there's just so much in the book and on my website and all my proceeds my book, my scripture bear we have a scripture bear that plays eight Bible verses for little ones my Seed Kids, which can be seen on Right Now Media, pure Flix, answers TV and my Seed Kids books. All the proceeds go towards my nonprofit, Raising Christian Kids. Pew Research has indicated that 66% of Christian families make less than $30,000 a year. They can barely afford necessities, let alone a Bible or a parenting book or a Bible study or a children's book. So all that money that I make goes towards keeping that room stocked and working with churches to give the items to these parents for free.

Ellen Krause: 30:58

Oh, that's so beautiful, Lee Ann. We just had a baby shower for my daughter, Ashley, this past weekend. Someone gave her the bear, so cute, isn't he cute?

Lee Ann Mancini: 31:09

He's so cute.

Ellen Krause: 31:11

So cute. I love him. Oh my goodness. Wow, that's so cool. Well, Lee Ann, before we go, I want to ask you some of our favorite Bible study tool questions. What Bible is your go-to Bible and which translation is it?

Lee Ann Mancini: 31:27

Well, you know, I as a professor, I used to teach apologetics at the college and that was one of the big topics and after doing a lot of research, I prefer the NIV was one of the big topics and, after doing a lot of research, I prefer the NIV, and for other reasons. If someone wants to reach out to me later I can explain it to them. But I love this, this one. It's called Spirit of the Reformation Study Bible. It's just, I mean, it's chock full of all kinds of additional information in that Bible, so I like that. I don't even think you can buy it anymore. It's an NIV version, but that's the Bible I like to go to. And the other question I know there was two more you had in there.

Ellen Krause: 32:06

Yes. Do you have any favorite journaling supplies or anything that you like to use to enhance your Bible study?

Lee Ann Mancini: 32:13

experience. Well, I love to you know, highlight, of course, and put little tabs for whatever I'm studying that week. I like to take notes on the side when I do my research for the podcast, for my solo episodes. I do a lot of that, but I know your third question kind of ties into that.

Ellen Krause: 32:33

if you want to ask me that, what is your favorite app or website for bible study tools?

Lee Ann Mancini: 32:40

I love Logos. It's a phenomenal tool. I had to purchase the program when I was in seminary and in there, uh, there's a tool in logos where you can actually click on the Bible verse and put notes, type in your notes, share websites or other articles. So when I want to research something, I want to research a certain Bible verse, I go in Logos, I click on that Bible verse and then I have all this, all my notes and all the additional resources, at my fingertips.

Ellen Krause: 33:16

Notes and all the additional resources at my fingertips. Ooh, okay, we use Logos too and I love that tip. That's a great tip, okay, and truly an incredible, credible software for those who are ready to take a very deep dive into your Bible study. It's a most excellent resource. I will study its most excellent resource. Well, Lee Ann, thank you so much for being here to share about this very important topic our children and their spiritual well-being. We appreciate your insights so much, thank you.

Lee Ann Mancini: 33:50

Well, thank you for having me, E llen, it's a pleasure to be here.

Ellen Krause: 33:55

Thank you, and for our listeners, pick up a copy of Lee Ann's book Raising Kids to Follow Christ. We will have a link in our show notes. We love you all. Thank you for listening. Have a blessed day.