Let Your Anger Flow. Learn about CJ’s Mop Meltdown

In this episode, CJ discusses his recent temper tantrum—what triggered it, how it unfolded, and what it revealed about anger and being human. What started as frustration over a faulty mop quickly turned into something bigger, exposing a deeper reaction that many of us try to avoid or suppress.

He explores the idea that emotions are energy in motion, and that anger, when acknowledged and allowed to move through the body, can actually clear space rather than create harm. 

CJ shares insights from past experiences with emotional release and reflects on how quickly we judge ourselves for having these moments, especially when we think we’re supposed to be “aligned.”

CJ also introduces the concept of “forward leaning”—those times when we’re pushing, forcing, or trying to control outcomes instead of listening and allowing. Through this honest moment, he invites listeners to notice their own patterns, soften their response, and return to a more natural state of alignment and creative flow.

And if you’d like to go deeper into this work, you can find CJ’s books The Spiritual Artist and Spiritual Parable: A 40 Day Practice on Amazon.

Want to learn more about CJ Miller? Check out his Spiritual Artist Retreats, 1:1 Personal Coaching, and Speaking Engagements at www.spiritualartisttoday.com. His retreats are designed to help you reconnect with your Creative Intelligence and express your true artistic voice. You can also find his upcoming schedule there, and his book, The Spiritual Artist, is available on Amazon.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome to the Spiritual Artist Podcast. This is Chris Miller. I invite you to join me as I interview artists from a variety of disciplines. We'll share powerful stories and lessons learned while making their art.

SPEAKER_01 0:26

Wow. Well, I'm going to share something that was really embarrassing, and I can't believe I'm going to share this. But you know, I've decided to be open and outright. So I just had a temper tantrum. I did. I had a temper tantrum. Let me explain why and how angry I was and what I did. So I constantly have these dogs coming in and out of the house and they leave marks on the floor, and I try to clean it up occasionally and I try to get a mop. I can't tell you how many mops and how many cleaning systems I have piled up in my laundry room. Well, I finally got a new one that's supposed to be real easy with a ringer on it. And I ordered new mop heads and I put it on and I start mopping, and the head just keeps falling off. So of course I go online and I find out that they're known for defective product. They're known for defective product, and they're still selling it. And I can't tell you how angry it made me. I got so angry that I started hitting the head of the mop against the floor and broke the top off. I mean, literally angry, angry, angry. And I thought, I don't let myself do that very much. It's childish. I'm embarrassed. I'm I'm supposed to be a spiritual artist. I'm always supposed to be in alignment. Well, you know, sometimes you're not. Sometimes you're not in alignment. And I can't believe that I had this temperature that is so embarrassing, broke the head of the mob, got online, I'm returning the heads that I just spent$25 for. And it just, oh my God, I can't tell you how angry it makes me that there's so many companies out there willing to sell a product that doesn't work, that's full of lies. And there are a lot of them. Last summer I bought this mosquito product. It's supposed to hang from trees. It's advertised everywhere if you're on Instagram. And then they have all these posts on there. It's wonderful. It killed all the mosquitoes. But let me tell you something. It didn't help me at all. It caught about 50 flies, but not a single mosquito. And yes, I went and watched the videos and I watched how to properly make the solution and all that. And it still didn't work. And the company then, who says free returns, no problem, 100% guarantee, when I emailed them, they started questioning whether or not they could return it and take it back. And I finally just gave up. I thought, I can't believe this. I can't believe that these companies are out there selling something that they know doesn't do what they promise. And maybe that's a well, no, not maybe. That's obviously a pet peeve of mine. And it made me so angry when I looked online and found out there's all these complaints about this mop head that the ringer connection isn't correct. It's not designed correct. They don't hold. So, what an embarrassing moment, right? You know, I want to share something with you. There's a podcast probably about a year and a half ago with Dr. Jane Gardner, and it was one of my favorite podcasts, and she talks about using anger therapy. Anger therapy, that these emotions sometimes build up in us, especially anger. And we in our society, we are taught to hold it in, to look calm, to be peaceful, to accept it. But actually, there's a wonderful release that happens when you let yourself feel the anger. And you know what she recommends? And I want to share this with you because I was talking to one of my friends and I shared it with him last week. She recommends taking a baseball bat into your bedroom and just screaming and hitting the mattress, letting all the anger and frustration out. And I did it. I did that about two years ago. And honestly, I have to tell you, that's probably the last time that I had a temperature. Two years ago, I've always like the spiritual person doesn't get angry. I can deal with this. I accept it. They're just not conscious about what they're doing. Well, you know, we're human. And I want to share that with you too. We're human. We do get angry. We do feel an injustice at times. There's times that we need to take action. And so when I took that baseball bat two years ago and hit my mattress and I screamed, she tells you, scream as loud as you want. Let it out. Get into that barbaric, animalistic side of you. There's a release. Maybe that's the only reason I'm able to sit here right now and share this podcast with you, is that I just did the most childish thing in the world. And let me just tell you how arrogant little CJ can be. Whenever I watch a movie and I see someone having a temper tantrum, I think, oh, that's people don't do that. People don't do that. Where they actually throw something against the wall or break things or destroy a room. That's kind of arrogant of me, of little CJ. I really do think that it's time to accept that we have anger issues. And yes, sometimes it can be funnel in a quick jog or going to the gym, but sometimes it just whirls up on us. And I'm not saying to act out on any person ever, to not affect any person, animal, any living creature. But didn't this mop head kind of deserve it? Didn't it just deserve it? I mean, really, I can't believe it. And here it is. This is a product sold through through uh Home Depot. It's online through Amazon. They keep carrying it. I'm sure there's tons of complaints, no sort of responsibility for their actions. Make the buck up front and run. So didn't I guess it was it it is kind of challenging. And I guess I should maybe try to learn to hold it in, but maybe not. What do you think? I'd love to know. I'd love for you to share with me. Email me at CJ Miller at spiritual artistoday.com. Let me know. I'm curious. Is it okay to be angry? Is it okay to express that anger? Is it okay to sometimes go outside and just yell to the sky? Or go to the gym and grunt real hard and lift some heavy weights, as long as you don't throw your back out. Is it? Or should we always moderate our emotions? And I think that our emotions have to go through us. You know, uh excellent interview while back was with my husband, and I'm gonna have him coming up, and we're gonna talk about emotions in an upcoming podcast. They are emotions, energy, emotion. They have to come through us. And maybe, maybe if I was still holding that anger right now, I wouldn't be able to realign and get creative again today. And so that's what I always ask my spiritual artists is to learn how to moderate your alignment. So I'm going to share another term with you that I love. I call it leaning forward. Are you leaning forward? And so I always ask myself throughout the day, Chris, is this action leaning forward? What does that mean? Leaning forward means that if I'm doing something because of fear, anger, insecurity, worry, and I'm trying to force it, force it ahead. When I'm working on a project, I'm like, I gotta get this done. I gotta get it, see, feel that energy, I gotta get this done. Or when I'm working on a painting, I have to finish this. If you feel that when you're painting, stop, put the brush down because you're just gonna go upstream. Let yourself walk away from the canvas. Let yourself walk away from anything, leaning forward, forward leaning. Are you forward leaning? And I do it all the day, all the day long. And probably, well, I was forward-leaning when I was trying to mop that floor. I was forward-leaning. I gotta clean this floor. It's it's embarrassing, these dog prints everywhere. So watch yourself throughout the day and make sure that you tap yourself gently back in alignment, maybe before. Maybe before you slam the mop head against the floor and shatter into a million little pieces. And then adjust, step back, take some time out, go in a different direction, focus on something else, put your attention elsewhere. So if you're listening to this little uh podcast interview of shame, and I guess I feel a little bit of shame for this, um, I know I do, and you're working today, and you're forward-leaning, you're trying too hard, you're pushing. Take a deep breath. Slow down. Listen to the silence between the sounds. Listen to the silence in you. And align. And when you align, things are delivered to you easily. Things do come to you. You don't have to force them, you don't have to lean forward. They come to you. I do believe that the creative field of intelligence will bring you that instinctual move on the painting, that decision to finish that project, the thing you need to know to make that repair happen. So, thanks for listening to me, Vent. Um go out there, get a bat, maybe, go into your bedroom, explore, make sure your neighbors can't hear you so you don't get the police to call on you, but just let it out. Let your anger out. Go out there, paint something out with anger, feel it completely. Let yourself be a spiritual artist.

SPEAKER_00 9:58

Thanks again for listening, and I'll talk to you so thanks again for listening to the Spiritual Artist Podcast.

SPEAKER_01 10:05

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