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Coffee with a Twist!
Coffee with a Twist!
Finding Strength in Vulnerability and Choosing Serenity: A Personal Journey of Resilience and Self-Care
As the first light of dawn spills into the kitchen, I find myself whisking eggs and flipping homemade McGriddles, not just cooking breakfast but serving up thoughts on the complexities of strength and vulnerability. This morning's muse, sparked by a riveting storyline from "The Rookie," leads us to a candid conversation about the weight of societal expectations on women—particularly black women—to maintain an unwavering façade of resilience. In sharing my own journey through family illness and the silent battles we face, I peel back the layers of what it means to find strength in moments of weakness, and how showing vulnerability requires courage in itself.
Turning the page to a lighter chapter, I contrast the bustling hum of nail salons against the tranquil ambiance of a massage therapist's touch, sharing why I'm choosing the latter for my sanctuary of self-care. While the nail industry's shine has dulled in my eyes, the profound relaxation of a deep tissue massage beckons me to a state of serenity that even the comforts of home can strive to emulate. And speaking of home comforts, tease your culinary curiosity as I unveil the latest gadgets and appliances that have revolutionized my cooking game, transforming my kitchen from a room of necessity to a realm of gastronomic discovery. Join me on this personal and indulgent journey, with each bite and each breath, we find strength in the softest places and joy in the simplest pleasures.
Thanks for listening coffee with a twist.
Email me at: coffeewitatwist@gmail.com
Hey guys, welcome to Coffee with the Twist. Happy New Year. It is the middle of January. I hope everyone had a great new year, a great week, great day, great weekend. This is a long weekend. I'm Martin Luther King Day is on Monday. I am not recording this at night, I'm recording this during the day so you may hear my house. In the background my son is playing his game. I got the radio on. Hopefully y'all can hear that this episode, I think, is going to be like a mom episode. I don't know. We'll see kind of where my thoughts go.
Speaker 1:I did want to get on here for some reason when I was cooking this morning which my job made like a really good breakfast, instead of going to McDonald's and Wendy's Krakabaro, wherever the heck we be going I saw this person on Snapchat. I forget her name, but she gets this credit. They made homemade McGriddles, so I tried it a few weeks back back in December. Turned out great. So this morning I made homemade McGriddles with eggs, sausages and some potatoes Not on the sandwich, sorry, let me make that better. I cut up some potatoes and baked those in the oven because I didn't feel like frying, and it turned out really good. So to go into a little bit of detail of that, because that's actually I'm going to go back to that, because I am going to talk about a couple of gadgets in this particular one. This might be like a gadget part two, but more detailed. Anyways, I say that to say I was cooking and I watched this show called the Rookie that comes on I believe it's Fox 5 or 9.
Speaker 1:I don't know CBS something, but anyways, I was thinking I don't know why it popped in my head, but I was thinking about the episode when the black cop, who's a female, was going into labor and they had someone break it into their house and she's a cop or husband or a boyfriend, is like an outreach organizational or organizer, something like. He's kind of like part of a boys and girl club, but on a smaller scale and anyways. So the episode was pretty much someone breaking into the house and she's in labor and also trying to fight off these people breaking in and the guy, of course, trying to help as well, and they were like two different rooms or something. I don't remember all the details because it happened. This episode is an old one, it happened a while back and I just remember at the time it's like, oh man, it's cool, she's beaten up, the guys arrested them, and having the baby like in labor, all at the same time to where she ended up giving birth. And from a entertainment standpoint it's like, oh great, and I see what they're trying to do show women power and all of that, and nothing's wrong with that.
Speaker 1:But then I took the other angle to it, that pressure that women have, especially black women. On top of it, she couldn't even have her birth in peace. She had to still be strong for her and her spouse and child. That's coming. So I say that to say I get it, but we shouldn't have to be strong all the time. It's almost like the other side of the coin to that is like it's like we can't be vulnerable, and I don't think that's healthy.
Speaker 1:People's health is real. The strongest person can be broken down. We worry about things and we don't just worry about ourselves. We worry about our whole family, our whole household. So if your husband, boyfriend or child is sick, you are too. You feel that You're taking care of that. You'll lose sleep over it. You know what I mean. And it's like I get it's TV.
Speaker 1:I don't bring that type of stuff into my episodes, but I'm using that as like a point to get across in general. It helps me get my point across of what I'm trying to say. At least I'm hoping I'm saying this right. But you know we need to. It's nice to be looked at as strong, but how? But when we're weak or vulnerable I guess it's the best word to say we're looked at badly and poorly.
Speaker 1:And then you have some women who that they they get more because they act weaker and the men and stuff cater to them more. But the ones that are strong don't seem to get the same support and I don't feel that's fair. You know it's not fair to a strong woman. We still need support, we still need love, we still need coddling. You know we're strong because we have no choice but to be. That's the only thing you can do and you know you're trying to raise up your family. You know your kids, even down to the damn dog. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1:So it was a great episode and definitely, you know, empowering to a point. But when you see the flip that coin and, like you, analyze it in a different way, it's like why do we always got to be? You know, powerful, I get. We are powerful beings and we're meant to be powerful. But you know we want to be taken care of as well, and I'm not just talking about money. It's not about money, you know, don't think about money. But being taken care of emotionally, mentally, physically is helpful. We can we take on so much? And it's hard, especially what your mom is doing. It's 10 times worse.
Speaker 1:I know, for me, if my household is sick or in an uproar or whatever, I'm in the uproar, I'm not sleeping at night. You know what I mean and I'm the last one to heal. But I probably thought of it because I'd been battling this like pink eye. So about two or three weeks ago Eli got pink eye. He's never had it before. Dan is like I mean, he's only five, but he got it and it lasted. You know they gave medicine and everything lasted maybe, you know, four or five days, but you know, take the medicine for seven. So he finished up his treatment on Friday, all good, no reoccurrence.
Speaker 1:And then I woke up Sunday with it, went to the doctor, same treatment, gave me that, but by like Thursday it just really wasn't getting better. It was just like reverting back and you know, and that whole week I felt crappy, which was last week, actually felt crappy, like all I did was like sleep, I was just extremely tired. I just didn't feel well, you know. So went back to the doctor and, mind you, right now doctors are hard to get into. It's so much illnesses going on. So luckily, you know, the insurances have like the metal that made MD live and stuff like that that you can talk to, at least for certain things.
Speaker 1:So anyways, called the doctor and he suggested he's like you know, we gave you good medicine. If that's not working, you know you probably want to go skid it looked at. So I asked him you know, should I, is it? You know, should I go to urgent care or a doctor, physician, or should I just go to an eye doctor? He's checked the state. That state, you know, the eye doctor can prescribe medicine.
Speaker 1:So I went to an eye doctor. I'm like I'm not going to keep getting the run around and paying all these damn copays and then they send me to the eye doctor, figure it's an eye condition and let him refer me elsewhere if he sees you like something else. So I made an appointment to the eye doctor, which they did an amazing job they were able to get me in, like I called around no, get me wrong, a lot of places couldn't get me in their book but I went to vision 2020. They got me in and out in like 15 to 20 minutes, like it was. It was a great experience. It didn't feel very commercial, very patient.
Speaker 1:Listen to my story again. I've never had pink eye either and I'm 39 years old now and I had a sore throat. So he's like you know, it's been a viral. You know stuff going around and they've seen a rise in like the pink eye and viral stuff that antibiotics isn't even treating. So, anyways, he gave me a supplemental medicine to take in my eye along with what I was already taking, and he said, you know, two to three days I should see improvement and you know, follow up in a week and he'll let me know then if I can stop taking in and stuff. But it was nice, you know, to go. I got in, I felt good, you have me. You know read the lines and stuff. So I will probably start using vision 2020, at least the location I went to.
Speaker 1:I really liked the doctor and the staff, but that's probably why I thought about it is like I'm up cooking. I'm like because you know I was supposed to rest for like two days, give your eyes a rest. But you know I started my treatment, I guess Friday night. Saturday I'm up, you know, cleaning up from the week, doing stuff. You know that didn't get done during the week and it's like, you know, as females and moms, you don't get a break, even with my eye all jacked up can barely see out of it. You know, my son still had to go to speech and stuff that Thursday and I'm driving around, you know the best that I can, and you know you just got to power through it and he had, you know, class. He goes to Saturday school.
Speaker 1:So I took that opportunity. Instead of me resting, what am I doing? I'm cleaning up everything from the week and and, and you know, mopping the floor. And you know, like we, just the world does not stop for us, you know, but I feel like it stops for everyone else. And you know that appreciation it's like it's hard to get, you know, it's like our jobs just don't stop. We don't get a break, you know. And so, yeah, so I didn't relax, you know.
Speaker 1:And then this morning I'm up cooking. That was, you know by choice. I, you know, wanted a good breakfast for my son and stuff and especially with us off Monday and get kind of a jump start on stuff to eat for the next couple of days with. You know everyone in my house will be home. So it's like I try to. Even though I'm cooking breakfast, I might start cooking one or two items for lunch and dinner. That way that part's done and then at lunch or dinner time I just add, you know, whatever meat or whatever it is I'm cooking. So I kind of do it that way. But yeah, I wanted to.
Speaker 1:I guess like a little bit about that. I'm sure there's other moms, even dads, that may feel similar. You know it's just hard, it's a lot of weight on us and you know be I think people are noticing it, but I guess it's one of those things that's been that way for so many decades and years and Centuries. Probably that it's just what it is and I'm just glad that now there's a lot more like therapy and mental health that people can get To least talk their way through it and find ways to cope with it and find strategies so that you don't feel like the weight of the world is on you. You know it's, it's definitely a good thing and you know, having your me time and stuff for me. As you guys know, I get massages like every two, two to three weeks. You know I go for massage and into harp on that. So you remember like I feel like At least growing up, you know you would always hear people like, oh, I'm going for a spa day, I'm gonna get my nails done, and you know, get a massage stuff and and I guess growing up I always thought you know, you see on TV or different things I thought like getting your nails and stuff done is relaxing, all right, and maybe it used to be, but are y'all with me?
Speaker 1:Is going to the nail shop Relaxing anymore? To me it's nothing relaxing about it Besides the fact that you hope to get some nice nails, looking nails and a good paint job. You know of your nails and feet when you leave out like it's nothing relaxing. They rushed through it so they don't even do a Full like manicure like they're supposed to like. I went to hair school and had to do nails as well and had to pass.
Speaker 1:And the way services go you typically, no matter what service you get, it's a basic starts with the manicure and you got a you know pushback. You got a soak pushback, cuticles, clip cuticles thing. You know things like that. They don't even do that. If you get like SNS gel, they don't even do any of that. And if you ask for like to get like the basics of a manicure, they charge you more. Like how it's going to the nail salon, even relaxing. A lot of times I don't even go anymore, like I have no joy In going, like before, like you get your pedicure, you pay your 25 dollars back in the day prices, right, 25 dollars.
Speaker 1:You get the massage. You get all that. Now they're like, oh, 60 dollars, you could get the massage. Or you get the Calluses, you know the build-up taken off. I'm like that was normally part of it. And then you okay, let's say you often do the 60 dollars they give you some quick ass, like one minute massage, barely get all your dead skin off. You know what I mean. They're rushing for the next. To me that's just not relaxing. So I said you know what? Let me do something that's more beneficial to me and my body, more with the self-care. I said f the nails, don't get wrong, I do get my nails and stuff done few times a year. Like far as my fingers, my toes, I kind of stick to like Um, the summer months getting them done, and during the winter I still get it done, but not as often, and I just make sure that I'm diligent at home of like putting like my Vaseline's and stuff and getting the dead skin off, things like that. But um, so I'm like you know what the price of getting a massage honestly To me, least where I'm at and I am just getting a 60 minute Swedish, I don't need all the bells and whistles um Is like 75 dollars.
Speaker 1:I went to the nail shop no joke, um, be right before Christmas, because it's like I'm feeling Christmas, seeing my birthday and stuff got my nails, feet and my nails done. I spent like a hundred and 20, 130 and I get I'm getting like two services, but again they're I'm they're not enjoyable. My toes really don't even look that great. They didn't really do the best paint job on them. You know what I mean. My nails fell off like a week later. Um, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1:Versus a massage, I'm paying 75 dollars. I get it's just for that hour, but I feel good through the day, through the week. So I don't know, you know you do what's best for you. If you, if, where you go, um, getting your nails is is good and I get, it might not be so much about the experience of it, just like, oh, I feel good, meaning like my nails look good. So I feel good. You know what you look me. I'm just, I'm trying to. I want a good experience, plus A relaxing experience, plus the the looking good of it. You know what I mean, me personally. So I opt for a massage. That's why I'm able to go a little bit more often.
Speaker 1:Um, then I wouldn't my nails, because my nails are costing over a hundred dollars and, mind you guys, I'm not getting nothing fancy. You know what I mean. I'm not getting all the designer looks and stuff out there. I'm just getting basic Short nails with some color, sometimes some glitter every once a while. Little design, nothing at all. And I don't even be getting gel like, especially on my toes. I just get regular polish Cost me and I get inflation's real. But I'm just like to me, it's just not relaxing. So, anyways, I go tomorrow for my massage. I'm gonna enjoy my hour, Um, and you know I want to relax and you know that is good for me. So it's kind of good that I did all that housework that I did Because my body is a little sore from like laying around most of the week and then, like, I guess, jalting in and like doing all this like cleanup, because I did kind of like a deep clean on my middle level because it was gross, and also with my pink eye and stuff I don't want it spreading, which of course the doctor said I'm not contagious, but just in case.
Speaker 1:So I, you know, wanted to clean real good life. So all of that, just so you know it doesn't circle back around to my son or my husband gets it. But yes, guys, being a mom is hard, yeah, y'all probably like she talked about a whole bunch of nothing. I know I'm sorry, but to close it out and I may do another episode after this one on this particular topic I'm about to talk about. So my gadgets Podcasts was one of like the first episodes I've done. Like the first five episodes I did when I started this, but two or three years ago I've been doing it a while, um, and it got great reviews. My gadgets got excellent, like people love kitchen gadgets. So, um, you know what now think about.
Speaker 1:I'm just gonna make a separate one on kitchen gadgets again, but I'm talking just to give I'm giving you guys a preview of what the next one will be and this will help me to know what the next one will be. So my first one was just kind of talking about the gadgets I had. I want to get more in depth in some of these gadgets. I actually ended up getting a new gadget that I do want to talk about. I have used it and I got mixed reviews about it and I kind of want to get into, like my food processor and things like that. There's some stuff I have that I was not using and I'm sure a lot of you guys have stuff like that. So I want to get more into detail about some of my gadgets and some advice I have with them and thoughts and suggestions with it. So we will make a second. I will make another episode this week on gadgets so I can really talk you guys through it and that way, if you do want to listen to it again, you can just go to gadgets versus here in my mom rant and then the gadgets. But anyways, I hope everyone's vision boards are hanging up and they're ready to start this year off right. My vision board is up.
Speaker 1:I am trying to start some things, not trying I am. You guys know I'm a real estate agent as well on the side, so if you ever need a realtor, please reach out to me. I don't care what state it is in, because I can still refer you to people in other states, which still helps me because I get a referral fee. So think of me if you are looking for any real estate needs renting, buying, landlord, anything, please. I'm gonna be doing webinars starting in February and probably twice a month. I'm going to have my phone line open to allow people to call with questions and stuff for like an hour on Saturdays and things like that. So I'm trying to really immerse myself in that and I have also linked up. I'm trying a couple of websites that help with, like posting content and stuff to Facebook. So please help me out fans On Facebook.
Speaker 1:If you go to where good things begin and good is spelled G-O-O-D-E and my name is Melissa B Good on there Please follow my business page, share my business page, like you know my business page, help me grow this year and I will definitely follow back as well and always feel free. You know, if you have some ideas, hey, maybe you should do this or that, please. I'm open for suggestions. I'm really trying to grow that business. I'm giving myself a my license renew in February or March and I'm giving myself the next two years to build. If it doesn't you know, if it just ends up, I guess not being for me, I'm going to just put my license and referral status, but I really do want to give it a good shot.
Speaker 1:I enjoy real estate and things like that. I've had a couple of sales last year but I'm really trying to get into a niche with it. So please, please, please. Any skate you know, reach out to me first so I can try to refer you guys. And it still gets me a little fee, a little kick back over here, which is all legal. But yes, please like me on and follow me on Facebook. Where good things begin, melissa B, good G-O-O-D-E and the good and where good things begin is G-O-O-D-E as well. So please follow me on there and I'll follow you back. You know, if you hear of you know events and things going on that I can set up that. I'm really giving it my all this year with that, as well as strengthening my skills in general. As you guys know, I do like process engineering and things, so I'm getting more skills and certificates and agile scrum and I'm also been looking into prompt engineering. So I'm trying to take this year to grow my side business and enhance my skills in general. There's been a lot of changes at work and who knows what the future will bring. So like, let me, you know, build where I can and, you know, have that income.
Speaker 1:Multiple false. It's like I tell you guys, multiple false. It's an income. You know, at the end of the day, corporations do what they wanna do and it's nothing you can do about it. Don't take it personal. Just always have other things brewing and growing for you to make some income. You might not make the same exact income, but you'll at least have something coming in to where it's not so detrimental to you. So, please, you know, at the end of the day, you gotta look out for yourself.
Speaker 1:This is the year. If you've been saying, oh, I've been wanting to go back to school or I've been wanting to do this, this is the year to do that. We're in the beginning of the year still. You're still this month of January. It gives you a good buffer to get things just set up. Set things up that way it works.
Speaker 1:That's what I've been doing since really December. I started working with other companies and getting things set up to where it does post automatically to my Facebook to help market. I've been reaching out to people. I even signed up to get another real estate license and another state Just different things that will be in my home state where I live, to where I can really grow like, use my neighborhood and stuff to be the realtor for it or the neighboring one. So just think of things. Use the rest of this month to get things set up. If it's a class, go ahead, sign up for it this month, even if it's not till March, sign up for it.
Speaker 1:Just use this time. Let's be smart. Let's work smart, not hard. We're only getting older. Corporations are corporations. Build your skills where you can in the areas that you're trying. If you wanted to switch jobs, let this be the time. If you're looking at other places or other jobs or other positions that's like, oh, I need this, I'm not that experienced in that, that's why I don't have this or that, then you need to start now. Start now doing those things. All right, guys. Well, I will end it there. Enjoy the rest of your weekend, enjoy your upcoming week, until we talk again. You're here with Madame Belu Coffee with a twist.