If I tell you about a gift that keeps giving, would you believe me?
A gift, that cleanses the soul
A gift, that helps me achieve my goals
A gift, that liberates the mind
A gift, that makes all the important parts of my life bind
A gift, that loves unconditionally
A gift, that reminds me to give wholeheartedly
A gift, that surrounds my entire life with a breath of fresh air
A gift, that floods my mind with cherished memories to share
A gift, that forgives my repeated mistakes
A gift, that forgets and immediately embraces
A gift, that teaches me to give the best version of myself to the world
A gift, that lives to his motto, “In the joy of others, lies our own.”
That gift is my Guru, Pramukh Swami Maharaj.
Since childhood, I have always looked forward to my birthday. Birthdays were when everyone in my home would come together and celebrate life, joy, and togetherness. For these celebrations, my family did not place importance on gifts but on gathering loved ones and, of course, enjoying a delicious piece of cake! This was a beautiful gift — joyful birthday parties in the company of family and friends. It made me feel loved and cherished.
Most birthday gifts we receive quench our worldly needs and provide temporary happiness. All this is not to say that I do not like gifts — because I sure do! However, as I approach my 30th birthday, I reflect on the most memorable gift I have received: my Guru, Pramukh Swami Maharaj — a gift who continues to give.
Spirituality has been a grounding force that has helped me persevere in the most trying times. In moments when I’ve lost a family member, moved abroad to study at a young age, or faced peer pressure in college, it has been spirituality that has helped me navigate. Due to the tireless efforts of my Guru, a Hindu community formed in Flushing, NY, laying the foundation of my spiritual journey. I still recall my mom placing me in the car seat every Sunday and driving one hour to attend the assembly in Queens.
Through my Guru’s guidance, my parents passed on to me the gift of introspection. They patiently helped me cultivate the ability to quietly and sincerely reflect. Since I began practicing, I’ve become witness to its benefits. Introspection has enabled me to recognize my shortcomings and positively make progress towards them. When I often felt trapped in constant negative talk, I learned to pause and identify the emotion fueling the vicious cycle. I recognized when I was feeling jealousy, anger, envy, or laziness. In working to improve, to overcome the driving factors for these emotions, I became kinder to myself and felt empowered to persevere. I found myself becoming more empathetic and kinder to others as well.
As I deepened my introspection practice, one thing that struck me was how Pramukh Swami Maharaj deeply lived true to the values of compassion, forgiveness, and humility. In learning about his life, I became motivated to shift the focus of how the work begins with me — instead of attributing the blame to circumstances or others.
Once Pramukh Swami Maharaj was having lunch and listening to letters that devotees had written to him. A letter written by a youth from the United States began to be narrated. But as soon as it began, the narration abruptly stopped. When asked about the pause, the reader explained that the pages were full of profanity and negative talk. “It isn’t worth reading,” he explained. However, Swami persisted in reading it further so he could understand the writer’s perspective and feelings. After its completion, Swami immediately said let us write a letter back apologizing for any wrongdoings and make sure the youth is looked after. Let us also ensure we take care of things on our end, so no one is ever hurt or misunderstood. Instead of reprimanding, Swami asked for the youth’s forgiveness and focused on his response. This incident from my Guru’s life further motivated me not to jump to blame or anger in my own life. Instead, he showed me how to look within to make self-adjustments. And it’s these small self-adjustments that have helped me to grow and cultivate a more peaceful mindset. By focusing on my own actions and reactions, I am now able to form healthy relationships with myself and others.
On September 24, 2002, two terrorists attacked the Swaminarayan Akshardham in Gandhinagar, India, killing 33 people. As the leader of BAPS, Pramukh Swami Maharaj immediately asked all devotees of the organization to pray for the deceased, including the terrorist. How could anyone extend forgiveness in such a circumstance, I thought. When I reflected on this incident more and more, I wondered how I could learn to express genuine compassion for those with whom I found myself in conflict. How could I express kindness in times of disagreement, discord, or wrongdoing? How could I pray for their betterment by forgiving and forgetting? To put this reflection to practice, whenever I feel that I have been wronged, I now ask myself, “What would Pramukh Swami Maharaj do in this situation?” This singular reflective question helps me realign with my values and the type of person I want to become. Whenever I feel lost, in any circumstance, this introspective question has never failed me. It is truly a gift that keeps giving!