The Divorced Dadvocate: Divorce Support For Dads
The Divorced Dadvocate: Divorce Support For Dads is a weekly podcast designed specifically for fathers navigating divorce. It addresses the unique challenges men face and offers practical guidance, emotional support, and real-life insights to help dads survive — and ultimately thrive — during and after divorce.
Each episode combines honest conversation, personal stories, and action-oriented advice to help listeners rebuild confidence, create healthy co-parenting strategies, manage finances, navigate court complexities, and heal emotionally. Since launching in 2020, the show has become a trusted resource and supportive community for divorced and divorcing dads.
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The Divorced Dadvocate: Divorce Support For Dads
275 - What 43 False Allegations Taught One Father About Changing the System
In this powerful conversation, Robert Garza reveals how his 16-year custody battle educated him about the dangerous loopholes in our family court system—and more importantly, how to fix them. He walks us through his revolutionary "Time Taken, Time Back" bill, which ensures parents automatically receive makeup time when false allegations are disproven. This simple yet powerful concept has already passed unanimously in Texas and North Dakota, protecting millions of families from one of the most common forms of custody manipulation.
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Hello and welcome to the show. Thank you for tuning in this week. Today I have a very important guest that has a very important mission that we're going to uh talk about and get you involved with. Before we jump into that, though, I wanted to welcome James, a new member to the Divorce David community. If you are not part of the community yet, check it out at thedivorcedavicate.com. We've got a new uh group, uh group workshop, group coaching going on October 29th. So uh check that out uh as well and get involved, get the divorce support that you need wherever you're at in this process at thedivorcedadvocate.com. All right, my guest from a father fighting for his children's rights to a nationally recognized advocate, Robert Garza's journey is a powerful story of transformation. He is the architect of Texas's groundbreaking parental equality law, and his work is now reshaping family courts across the country. As the new director of Americans for Judicial Accountability and the Vice President of National Family Justice, please welcome a true champion for families, Robert Garza. Hi, Robert. Hey, thanks for having me. Hey, Robert, thank you for for being on. Thank you for what you are doing. It's a true blessing that that you are that you're doing this work. I know that a lot of the dads listening today are gonna be very interested in what you're doing because it is gonna have a huge impact on their lives in the future. It already has in Texas. But before we jump into what that is that you are working on and the specific laws and how they'll impact the dads, share a little bit about your 15-year custody journey battle, if you will, and how that's kind of shaped why you're doing what you're doing.
SPEAKER_01:Sure. So I went through about 16 years now of family court, 43 plus false allegations. I spent$700,000 plus just trying to be a father in my kids' lives. It's not been an easy journey. You know, I was just a father parent, just like all of the listeners out there. I didn't know anything about family law, criminal law, constitutional law, and had to, you know, learn all this going through this process.
SPEAKER_00:So, yeah, okay. Well, I'm sorry to hear that. I have experienced that as well, 12 years in in family law court that'll give you an education, right? 43. So you've got me on the 43 CSP or CPS allegations for sure. While I've experienced some of that, that is just uh disconcerting, right? Having having people looking in your life all the time. Share a little bit how that experience helps you to start to understand the landscape of the family law, uh, of family law and family law courts. Sure.
SPEAKER_01:So every time you go in family court, you're having to live whatever consequences come out. And after going to court so many times in over 16 years, you get educated very quickly on what's going on. And so I saw all of the legal loopholes that opposing counsel was able to play with delays, with no accountability, with false allegations. And so because of going through that and living that, now I understand those loopholes, and now we're changing them with the legislature and shutting all those legal loopholes down.
SPEAKER_00:Okay. So let's let's talk about some of those loopholes and let's talk about actually first give us an example of what you're talking about as far as a loophole. Because some people might be thinking, and the first thing I thought was like, okay, so if there's loopholes, why hasn't somebody already thought about this? Why hasn't it happened? But you know, those listening and they haven't been in family law court for 12, 15, 6, 20 years will say, okay, well, this makes purpose sense why there's loopholes. But what like kind of give us an example of what one of those would be, and then let's jump into some of the bills.
SPEAKER_01:Sure. So one of the biggest legal loopholes that there are, well, it's not even a legal loophole. Perjury is a felony pretty much in every state. Judges are not prosecuting for it in family court, they're doing it in criminal court, but not family court. This is the problem where most of everyone's problems are coming from. People can get up there, they can perjure themselves, lie on the stand, and same thing with false allegations. False allegations are rampant through family court, and there's no accountability for them. And knowing this, so going through 43 of these, I figured out how my ex did this, and she did it with mandatory reporters. They've all been ruled out. She, my ex never came to court and said I did anything. She always did it through third-party people. And once that allegation was ruled out, I'd have to pay my attorney to go to court, get the protective order dissolved, and then at the time I would ask for the judge to give me the time back to repair the parental bond that was taken part by precaution by the court. She never did. She got tired of me asking for it every time all this would happen and said, okay, let's save it for final trial. I saved it for final trial, and she never ruled on it. Took over a hundred days to rule, got things wrong, and this is a problem with the legal system. And so what I did was I came out with time taken, time back that when you return the child, you shall return the time, the same type of time, and the same exact amount of time. And in doing so, it disincentivizes making a false allegation, but not a real allegation.
SPEAKER_00:Right. Okay. So let's let's clarify for the listeners the differences between civil court and family law court, because what you said is is accurate, that if you do this in civil court and you make false allegations or or you allege abuse and it's not whatever, whatever you're lying about, then you are responsible in in civil court. Family court that just gets completely you are you're supposed to be responsible, but it just gets completely, completely ignored, right? And and so it's just two different, it's two different applications of law in two different types of court. Is that correct?
SPEAKER_01:Yes. So in family court, there's what's called a preponderance of evidence, and that is like the lowest standard of evidence. That's 50% plus a feather. So literally, when you go in there, if you don't understand what that is, it's literally you can say whatever you want, and that's what the problem is. And if the judge believes it, it sounds more true or less true. That's what they're judging you on. It's either more true or less true. In criminal court, the standard is clear and convincing evidence. So now you have to show proof and why. And then they also have uh beyond a reasonable doubt. No. Yeah. Is it sorry, it's clear and convinced, sorry, preponderance of evidence, clear and convincing, and beyond a reasonable doubt. Those are the three evidences that that they go by. But the family court's the lowest, and that's the problem with with what family court's doing.
SPEAKER_00:Right. So for instance, in one of my experiences, there was just an allegation made. There's no there is no preponent evidence. There's no you know there is no clear evidence around it. And they do these in ex parte meetings, and then they have a and then you get a protection order, and then you have to spend, like you said, the money in either going through C child protection services or full investigation, or then appear before the court, and then you lose time. Like for instance, I lost weeks with with my daughter. I know that you've talked about there's like large, large periods of time that that you missed over the the time that you've been doing this, and then the courts do not do anything about that. And so you wrote this bill to then mitigate this so that it now does it stop it, or what does it do? How does it curb that, if you will, that that behavior of making these false allegations?
SPEAKER_01:Sure. So the way that my ex did it is that she went to a mandatory reporter, reported that I was harming the kids. The mandatory reporter thought they were doing the right thing and reported it to CPS because they're mandated to. CPS, which is Child Protective Services, thought they were doing the right thing and opening a case. And as soon as they open up that case, my ex would grab that report number and go to family court and get a protective order restraining order based on an open CPS investigation. All of this was done. Now I've shut that down in Texas and it's going in a lot of other states too. So if the judge would have just given me the time back the first time, second time, my ex probably never would have done this. But she saw it as a way to play keep away with the children. And so every time another one they would they would rule it out, she would make another allegation. And that was the issue, and it kept going, going, going. And the courts never figured out what had happened until we got to final trial. And we even asked my ex, like, you know, you know, how many of these allegations did you make or these reports? And she was like, none, and started smiling. That was the whole reason she knew she did it by proxy. And so instead of going back after her or anything else, I came out with these with these laws. Now, the time taken time back gives those resources back to all of these. Well so the time taken time back gives these resources back to all these agencies like the family court system. Now they're not backed up, and it's usually called I coined it, it's called holiday hijacking, and it's to let the court know that that person's trying to hijack my holiday with a false protective order restraining order. And once they do that, is that your car alarm?
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's sorry about that. Yeah. All right, sorry, you're gonna have to cut it. Yeah, no. Okay, we're real here, so it's real life. This is real real life stuff we're talking about, my friend.
SPEAKER_01:So yeah. So holiday hijacking is when somebody goes to a court and gets a protective order restraining order right before major holiday. So it's right before Christmas, right before Halloween, or you know, spring break. Lines of lawyers are out there at three o'clock or right before the kids getting out of school filing these things. Judges know this is an issue, but they keep doing it. So this discourages that type of behavior by giving that time back. So if you miss a spring break, then you're gonna then you'll get two in a row. If you miss a Christmas, then you'll get two in a row. And so that discourages a false allegation, but it it will not discourage a real allegation.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah. So I wanna I want to be uh clear. Uh a mandatory reporting person is like a therapist, is like a school teacher, etc. So what your ex did was creatively seed something in one of these people's minds that was a false allegation that then they because they're mandatory reporters, they have to report this. So they don't have a choice. So her way of doing this, and so this is just another, there's lots of creative ways, and I'm and I'm pointing this out because I want to point this out to the dads that are listening because lots of them deal with this, or lots of them see some of this stuff, or some of them are like, well, mine won't never do you know, my wife would never do that, right? And yeah, I know it's just we we get they then they get surprised by this. So I wanted to point this out so that they can look for the signs. But then what happens is they have to they have to report this, and then your acts took it, and then there's an automatic protection order. The other one you just described, which is the the holiday hijacking, is they they and I've experienced this like right before the parenting time is supposed to start with the new parent for the holiday, then they just they file something and then you miss all that time. And so now what you're doing with this bill is it makes it absolutely mandatory for the parent that has created this situation and made the false allegations because when you go through it, then the like you said, 43 times you went through the the the cow call the the protection services coming out, finding no evidence of it. When they find no evidence of that, then that time has to be returned, whether it's whether it's a day or two days a week or the holiday. And then you said that also if it's the holidays, then they get like the next two. So it actually disincentivizes them because then they're actually going to be losing time with their kiddos if they start doing this stuff. Is that correct? Correct.
SPEAKER_01:And the other thing that we did in it also passed in North Dakota, but we gave it an extra boost in North Dakota. We put double the time back. So that really discourages that one.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah. Well, even better. And so for those saying, well, okay, but you know, can can this possibly harm a kid on somebody who's actually doing harm to the to the kids, the answer is no. And and why is the answer no? Tell us why.
SPEAKER_01:Right. So in my bill, I also write in there that it's only after there's been an investigation by CPS or the police department or anybody, any any investigative agency, anybody, when it comes back that there was no finding of abuse or neglect, then is when you can get your time back or anything like that. Now, just in case there's something that falls through, there's also another clause in there that now it puts the burden of proof on the other person. Instead of you having to say why you're innocent, now they have to bring more stuff and say why you don't deserve that time back. It's an automatic time back unless they still want to keep fighting this. But there is no problem. Which is it's been ruled.
SPEAKER_00:Which seems to be right, right, which seems to be a huge problem, particularly with with dads that I've experienced. We don't, there's just it's not reciprocal. It doesn't happen. I oftentimes I see with the mom, the parent if the dad's doing some BS, and and let's be clear about what we're talking about here, too. This is not a dad or mom issue. This rules out anybody screwing around with doing any kind of false allegations, uh, alienation, stuff like this. This really starts to put a damper on that. Now it doesn't, it won't stop it like you just described. You're gonna have to go through the process, you're gonna have to you're gonna have to deal with uh protects the services or whatever investigation you might have a hearing, or you might have to uh hire an attorney, hire attorney, or you might have to go to court and and have a hearing with your attorney. So it is still gonna take you having to go and go through this, but what it does is then they get the time back.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, when when they return the child, they return the time.
SPEAKER_00:Return the time immediately. So so that's the parenting time part of it. Is there a component of this where attorney's fees or anything like that gets reimbursed back? And if not, why is that not part of the bill?
SPEAKER_01:So that's already in what you're filing. So what you're filing right now is to dissolve that protective order restraining order, and then you can ask for your attorney's fees. Okay, so you can ask for your attorney's fees in anything.
SPEAKER_00:Right. Okay, so so then you could potentially, but that doesn't mean that you're you're gonna get it automatically, right? So in the bill, you won't get attorney's fees, but you will definitely get time back with your kids because that is part of the bill, right?
SPEAKER_01:That's the most big biggest part. So what are you gonna do right now? Every time I filed, I paid my attorney's fees, and I never got the time back. So again, this is kind of like a like the civil rights movement. You have to ban slavery first, and then you can be president, then you can be, you know, uh vote, have equal rights, stuff like that. Let's ban slavery first.
SPEAKER_00:Yep, that's what I was that's what I was getting at, Robert, is this is a step in the process because lots of times dads are upset. I was upset always, I'm sure you were, that we have to pay this money, go through this, and then we like we don't get time back with our kids, we don't get any money back, et cetera. So this is one step in that process, which is the most important step, you would argue, which is gaining the time back to to to to repair that relationship with the kiddo after an allegation, because the thing that's not lost on not lost on us, but doesn't come into the conversation, at least in the family law court, I feel, is that this has done damage to the kids when you're making false allegations, when you're you know attempting to do this and alienate a kid, this is doing damage with you and and and the child and the child. So then the dads get that time back that is the most important part of it because then you can to repair that relationship with them. And it's not even it's not even just a justice thing, it's being able to deepen that relationship and and maintain that relationship, which is trying to be severed. So that was just the the point. Now the next point of it is like yeah, what you said is yeah, it would be nice to be able to get attorney's fees back and write that into a bill and like you know, and and and other things. And we're gonna talk about your your other bill here, which which does have some uh monetary compensation or fines, if you will, in that. But right now, we're trying to just limit anybody from doing these false allegations, which happens. I would I would guess, and I don't know if you have numbers around this, primarily with with dads or or or to a majority of the time with with dads, try to nip this in the bud because it has become such such a big problem.
SPEAKER_01:So the time taken, time back bill does a whole lot of things. First of all, it returns the resources back to the court system, it returns the resources back to CPS, it returns the resources back to the district attorney's office and to CPS. The biggest travesty in all this, other than what happened to me and my children, was that 43 times those investigations could have been going to children really being hurt rather than children not being hurt. And I'm just one person, so multiply that over millions of people, and that's where this stops before it starts the behavior.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah, absolutely. You and me, hundreds of thousands of guys that are that are listening as well. So awesome. Okay, let's talk, let's talk about the this the the three strikes law. So the first one that you were well first, how many people instantaneously did this law impact in Texas after you were able to get it?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. So the time taken, time back bill took six months. I couldn't get anywhere in my case in six months. It took six months to go through our legislature. It went through unanimous, bipartisan the first time. The governor signed off on it on Father's Day Day. It impacted over 30 million Texans all at once as soon as it came out September 1st, 2023, I believe. And so it went into effect. And so at that point, I mean, I couldn't help that many people in my lifetime, just one-on-one cases. And that's where I found that legislation is the way to fix this problems.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, that's and and and that's and that's brilliant. So let's let's talk about the the three strikes law. What are the three strikes and what are the consequences for this custody interference?
SPEAKER_01:Yep. So there's two different versions of it. There's three-strike civil version and three strikes criminal version. The three-strike civil version right now, we were having problems with judges giving hand slaps 20 times. Like we even had one guy that had 20 interference with child custody, took the ex to court, never reprimanded really. And so we came out, and and this is not just one person, this was happening all over the state. And and it happens all over the country. And so what we did is we put through what was called three strikes. It was a House Bill 3181 in Texas, and it passed this session. And so what that does, it give it makes the judges give jail time uh on the third strike, and that's the biggest part of that one. So if you go back into civil court, not criminal court, that's the three strikes criminal version. The three-strikes civil version is a passed bill right now, and it went into effect already, September 1st, 2025, that if you have three contempt filings and convictions in family court, the judge has no more discretion in Texas. It's automatic jail time. And that's going to discourage this behavior. Now, the three strikes criminal version is when somebody interferes with your child custody after you have a court order. And then right now it's a state jail felony pretty much in every state when they interfere, but they tell you it's a civil matter to go back to family court. After this bill passes in your state, the it's the only tool that law enforcement has. And when they come out, they'll be able to give a$500 fine the first time, the second time, and then the third time, it will be it they get arrested. And if you think about this, everyone usually has at least standard possession. So that's Friday, sorry, every first, third, and fifth weekend, every Thursday for whether it's two hours or overnight. So your first period of possession that that they miss is going to be a$500 fine. So that's Thursday. The second period of possession is Friday, Saturday, Sunday. Literally by the third, by the following Thursday, that's the third strike.
SPEAKER_00:So it doesn't, it doesn't get it doesn't get dragged out. And let's let's clarify also for the audience that when what what oftentimes happen, and I'm sure some have already experienced this, if you're if if custody or parenting time is being withheld and you call law enforcement on that, they're not going to do anything. They're going to say, hey, that's a that's a civil matter, you need to go back to court, you need to talk to attorneys, and then you do that, you file a contempt, you may or may not get the contempt uh ruling for you. Even if you do get the contempt ruling for you, it's usually something like they don't want to see you there, basically, right? They want you to to figure this stuff out. And then, you know, there they continue to there's no there's no incentive to stop doing stuff like that. So what this does is it not only so it not it's not only in civil, but it makes it a criminal charge. So the uh the law enforcement then this actually has teeth. Law enforcement will do something now, because that's the most frustrating thing now is you just they just keep saying no, and law enforcement's like, I can't put drag the kids out, I can't do anything. This then they will give them a$500 citation right there, like you said. And then it doesn't take forever, it doesn't take like months and months. If they keep doing it, it could take a week, two weeks, right? And then they could end up in jail because they get another 500 citation, and then the third time is bam, they get arrested.
SPEAKER_01:Well, the problem with that, and I'm sure y'all have experienced it, but after I came out with the time taken time back bill my and and the law, my ex stopped doing false allegations and started interfering with my child custody. So I had to figure that one out, and that's why this was born. And I went both routes. I went both. It took six months to get into family court for an enforcement action because the delays and games and whatever. And it took six months to get to law enforcement and grand jury and everything else that way. So much waste of time, and literally you can hijack the kids or brainwash them or alienate them if someone just withheld all those times. That's what a lot of you parents are experiencing. This will solve the issue literally within a week. And a lot of people come back and they're like, Well, you just want well, not even a lot of people. It's only one organization didn't understand the bill, and they're like, Are you trying to jail protective parents? Absolutely not. Think about it. And I told them, I was like, let me ask you something. It's a felony right now, as soon as you withhold the first time. That's arrest right now. I'm amending that to two to two times, and then the third time you get arrested, what it is right now. I'm all for protective parents. In fact, this is this will protect protective parents because now it's that$500 fine's a misdemeanor. You go to criminal court, not family court, to talk about this, and you can get it dismissed like a speeding ticket if you took them to CPS or or something's going on. So you literally have three times to bait, you know, to be a protective parent and figure out something, and they'll dismiss the ticket if if you did something, you know, to protect that child. But if not, this stops the bad parents, but it doesn't harm the good parents. In fact, it protects them even more.
SPEAKER_00:Right. And there's and and there's no the it does not disrupt or interrupt or stop any due process. All the due process continues to happen the same way as the system. Like you said in the beginning, all this does is it just takes away what you're calling loopholes or for people manipulating the the system to their advantage. So that's that's brilliant. So that's that's the second bill. You've already been successful with these two bills in in Texas and in North Carolina or in North Dakota, right? Has the three strikes law happened in uh North Dakota also?
SPEAKER_01:No. Yes. So the three strikes they tried to join them before, but now they did a committee like to investigate how much of this issue is going on. We already know in Texas. In fact, San Antonio gets over a thousand interference child custody calls a month. 1,200 cities, that's 1.2 million uh interference with child custody calls a month that the law enforcements are having to spend resources going out that they can't do anything. This solves that issue. Literally, they'll I hope that nobody gets a fine and nobody goes to jail. I hope that it just stops the bad behavior, which I've I 100% believe it will. But no matter what, you cannot legislate crazy. There's gonna be 1% or 10%, whatever of it that's gonna keep happening, but not the 90%. The 90% will go away.
SPEAKER_00:Right. So and yeah, go ahead.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, I forgot to tell you. So when I came out with the three strikes, right now it's in in Texas legislation right now. We've had a session, a special session, a second special session. There's a lot of stuff going on. There's 11,000 bills, so it has nothing to do with mine. It has everything to do with like what's going on in Texas. But after passing it in North Dakota, the time taken, time back, and Texas, I saw that this is how to change on a mass level. So what I've done over the last eight months is sit down and I wrote over 450 bills. That's about seven or eight per state. And it's these same bills, and I've amended them already for each state for all anybody that wants them in their state, they can just go to robertgarza.us and there's a couple of things in there they can just download and put them in their own state.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, we're gonna get we're gonna get to that. I'm gonna because I'm gonna get into that in in specific detail for for folks. But I wanted to make the point that there's nobody that should be arguing against this. This is beneficial for law enforcement. This is this is beneficial for all of the different agencies that are involved, the mandatory reporters, obviously the kids, and and both parents. There are no drawbacks to this. It just just clear, it just clears things up, makes things very definitive, and stops crazy, like you said, stops crazy, bad, manipulative behavior from happening in this system. So there's not when when you when you introduced this in taxes, or when she introduced this in North Dakota, there wasn't any kind of party line any any kind of party line opposition to this, one side or the other. Like it went unanimously through because it just makes sense, correct?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, well, think about it. Who's gonna raise their hand and say, I don't think that that child deserves that time back after an allegation has been there's no abuse found and no neglect. Not one person.
SPEAKER_00:Right. Yep, nope, perfect. I just want to I wanted to clear, I'm gonna make that clear because you know, we're talking about legislatures, it's uh they're always fighting about stuff. Your bill, there's nothing to fight about in this bill, other than maybe misconceptions, like you said, the one group uh might have or somebody might have a misconception about what it can or can't do, but there are no unintended consequences around this. The only consequence is that there will be better behavior by everybody in involved, and there's no due process. So I wanted to make that clear. So let's let's talk about the the family equality bill. So I'm I'm really excited to to talk about this one. Yeah, and walk us through the key proposals of that, such as the 50 50 custody as a starting point and And also the cameras in the courtroom.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. So a new started equality is a new started equality. It's fifty-fifty for both parents that are a fit parent, willing parent, and able-to-do it parent, and live within 25 miles of your child's school. That's it. The rest of the bill is, you know, if the judge wants to go below those standards, then they have to have clear and convincing evidence, not preponderance. I wrote this in the bill, clear and convincing evidence on why they're going below that standard, and they have to write it into why in into their decision why they are going below those standards. And so that is all the difference right now. And then below that, it has talks about that you cannot have 50-50 if you have domestic violence, abuse, convictions, and some other stuff in that bill. The bill is literally a one-page and it protects everybody. There is no unintended consequences. There's nothing in that bill that anybody can really argue about.
SPEAKER_00:Okay, so this puts some responsibility upon the court in order to describe and and and put in writing what that preponderance of evidence is that makes them rule that you have to be, you have to go off of the 50-50, right? So this becomes less sub oh clear. I'm sorry, clear and convincing. That they have to have clear and convincing evidence to go away from 50-50. So this keeps it, this makes it way more objective and a lot less subjective. So so have you so have you got any pushback from courts on that? Because we know that judges like to rule their their courtrooms and and have the flexibility to rule how they want. Has there been any feedback around around that?
SPEAKER_01:No, in fact, if you look at all my reels, I have lawyers, I have senators, I have Republican, Democrat, it doesn't matter. They're all over the board. Parents, all for all of my bills because they're they're good bills. It's great legislation, it's opening. And the problem with most of the courts right now is there's a there's a lot of bad apples in there that have been there for a long time that do whatever they want. They let justice get to their head or or their their positions because they have immunity. And so there's really nothing you can do. And then when you have a SCJC, which is who you make complaints to in Texas, if a judge is doing something wrong with a less than 1% reprimand, and they could choose whether it's private or or public, this is the issues with all these things. But we're changing all these things on a mass level. But as far as pushback on the on any of the bills, no, no, all of them are very pretty, they're simple, they're no nonsense bills. And like the time taken time back, I could have retroactivated the bill and got two or three years with my children back, but I didn't do it because it would stop up the courts. I was willing to let go of my own time with my children just to be able to make these courts run more efficiently and for the people and by the people instead of what they are right now.
SPEAKER_00:Right. And that's ultimately what the courts want, right? They want an off-ramp to get this off their books, to get this done, do it as quickly and easily and as efficiently as possible. There, it's not the courts, I would say family law, and this is my description of it, is less about justice and more about efficiency and you know getting stuff done and what you're doing here is really helping that in and it's not a huge complex process that you're you're well, it's complex for you and writing all the bills, so let's get into this a little bit. But you're not rewriting whole bills, you're not like creating all new legislature, you're literally taking what is existing, the statutes and the bills that are existing, and you're just revising and really just tweaking some of those, which is I'm assuming one of the reasons why the legislators are like, okay, yeah, this is easy. I don't have to, we don't have to lobby this, we don't have to like get into it's just taking the existing language, the existing bills, making some small changes to it, and then getting it passed. Is that correct?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, when you can explain it to them and I'm not emotionally throwing up on them about my own case and my kids and whatever else, and you say, look, I have a problem with family court with false allegations, here's the solution. I have a problem with interference, here's a solution. I have a problem with not getting 50-50 from the get-go, here's the solution.
SPEAKER_00:So that's straightforward, it's easy. Like you said, there's it's one page, right? So they're they're not looking at that stacks of bills and needing to read through them and try to understand them or have a legal expert or somebody. It's real straightforward. You just described I'm having issues. This is an issue in family law court, this is a solution for it. Can you look at it? So on that, on that note, you said that you've now gone through all 50 states here and and and looked at this and have created a system on your website to help all of the rest of us to work on your behalf, or it's really on our behalf, but you've created the system to help us go through that and and approach our legislators and start the process in our respective states. Share with us how how we do that, where we go, and then we're gonna talk through that a little bit because I know automatically people start going like, oh, I gotta talk to my legislator, oh, like I gotta get involved in politics now. And no, it's nothing like that. It's as straightforward, it's it's simple. I'm promising you, it's as simple as I've been involved in politics. I have once upon a time I had a lifetime in politics, or a life in politics, I should say it felt like a lifetime when I was in it. But like Robert's describing it is straightforward and it is as easy as he is describing. So I want you to, I want the listeners to pay attention to this because we need to all now, wherever you're at in your divorce, get involved. This is post-divorce, it's not going to take a lot of time, but we need to get involved in helping. You know, Robert's helped us to help ourselves, but getting involved in Robert's organization and and go through this process and get this stuff passed in all 50 states. So how do they do that?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, so you go to my website, robertgarza.us, sign up to be an advocate. Once you do that, you'll receive an email, click on it, it'll put you in a in whatever state you're in, whether it's Texas, California, whatever, wherever you're at, doesn't matter. And you can be in two states, three states at once, because some people's cases are complicated. No problem. Every bill that I've written so far, well, not all of them, but eight of them that I've written so far are on robertgarza.us. You literally click on the bill, it'll pull up the bill itself. It already recognizes what state you're in, so you're not having to thumb through a bunch of bills or anything else. It's very straightforward. So when you click on your state, pulls the bill up, the first thing you click on is legislative pack, and that will have three pages. The first thing is an email, you just copy paste it to your legislator. I already wrote it in in every state, it's already amended to your code, and it fits the time taken, time back, three strikes, all that into it. And so you just paste it in an email to them. You write your name at the top, theirs, or you theirs at the top, yours at the bottom, and that asks for a 10 to 20 minute Zoom call with them. And so when they respond to you, you send the Zoom link to me, we zoom in, you talk to your senator or legislator or their staff and say, hey, here's my problem that I'm having. Talk several minutes if you want about your case to them, and then I finish it off with, here's the solution. I mean, literally 95% of the time it's a done deal. And it's that easy. It's already amended to their state. They read it, they see that it doesn't affect a lot of their code. You're not sending them 23 pages of revisions. It's literally one page. And it's done. Like literally, this can go in. Legislation starts usually December, January. And so if we can get these bills into your state early, then it'll work. Right.
SPEAKER_00:Folks, listen folks listening to this, this this is brilliant because what happens is that all of these legislators, and and and look, this doesn't, it doesn't matter if if you're a Republican and you have a Democrat legislator, or you're a Democrat and you have a Republican legislature, none of this matters, right? Because this is not a partisan issue. This protects kids and helps families across the board. So don't feel like, well, I don't want to talk to my legislator for whatever political reason. That's stupid. This is, I mean, that's not stupid, but it's just in this situation, it it doesn't matter. So so what you can you can it's simple, it's like it is cut and paste that what what Robert has has created. And these offices, they pay attention to everything that comes in. So don't feel like this is a waste of time. They will respond to you. Now it might take a little bit of follow-up, but you will eventually get a response from somebody. It might not be directly from the legislator themselves, but that could probably even be better, right, Robert?
SPEAKER_01:Yes. The legislators are really busy right now, too, with their own lives, their own businesses, and whatever else. And this is the off season. So if you talk to their staff, which you probably will get pretty quick on the phone, after you send that email, wait a day, call the staff, you know, call their office, say, hey, I just sent you an email yesterday. Can you look at it? And they'll look at it while you're on the phone. When can I set a date? And literally they'll set you a date right there. They're super nice to work with. They'll book the date for you. And if they're staff, it's even better because a legislator is really busy and they get you know bombarded with stuff. Sometimes they won't remember who you were or what that was about. But the staff, 90% of the time that I've seen staff do this, they know someone that went through what you went through, or they went through it yourself. Very few times do we find a legislator that has gone through this because they all most of them come from nuclear families and just different things. But when you do get a legislator that has gone through this, it is night and day. They said, I'll take all your bills. Like once they see them, they're done.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah. And and and so legislators, folks, they are people like you and me. So they have an interest in wanting to solve things and problems that are out there. It's just that it becomes it's such a difficult and complex process some of the time, but this is not, and that's and and that's why I'm encouraging you to get involved with this. This is really, really straightforward to get something done like this, like Robert has done in Texas in six months, and the impact that it can have, it is worth the the few hours that you're gonna spend on sending an email, setting up a call, and then starting this process. And then you don't necessarily have to be involved with it from there on in, because what you've done now is you've set up a time to have a Zoom call or phone call with Robert yourself and this legislator, and then Robert's gonna take it from from from there. And you can you you can hear just from from his experience and from what he's done. And literally, he's gone in and he's rewritten multiple bills in every one of our states. So he knows and he understands the nuances of this. Him explaining it to them is just a real straightforward no-brainer process, like like he said. Yeah, I speak their language. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. And you're but you're not an attorney, right? You're a dad that has had this experience that just wants to solve the problem for families and kids. And so, which is what we like what we all want, and and the dads listening that are having challenges around this, man, this is something I know. I'm gonna be we've already got somebody here in Colorado, but I'm gonna do whatever I can to help that here because we need to have this, these bills done in every single state across the uh the the the country the country. And I wanted to point out so on the on the the 50-50 parenting time, the the what is it called the new start at equality? New start at equality bill in Kentucky, and you guys heard my podcast just a couple of weeks ago. In Kentucky, they passed something similar to this. It's not your it's not Robert's bill, but they passed 50-50 parenting time as a start, made a statutory, it reduced divorces overall by 25% in just one year. So the impact that this is going to have on lives across our country is absolutely huge. I cannot, I just cannot emphasize it, guys. For as little amount of time that it was going to take each one of us listening to get involved in our state and go to Robert's website, send an email, set up a time, this can have just a huge impact. 30 million people in Texas in just six months for for Roberts for Robert's bill there. Can you imagine if we if we each just did this in each one of our states, the the huge impact that we're gonna have? Just please, please do it and get involved. So um let's see. So let me uh I'll ask you a final question. I think well, I wanted to make out one other point. Robert also has a training on this. So if you're if you're not comfortable still after listening to it, going to the website, signing up for to be an advocate, and then looking at it, he does is it a weekly or a monthly call where he'll just he'll even walk. It's a weekly call, it's open to anybody. And so so you can jump on that, and he he literally will take you through the website and show you how to do this and answer any questions. I went I was on it last week with with you, and you did a great job with it. Friends, this is like this is so it's easier than ordering from frickin' Walmart for or or or Amazon online, and you're gonna have a huge, huge impact. So get involved with that.
SPEAKER_01:So I did want to tell everybody that it was free. It's free. There's no cost for training, there's no cost for advocating, there's no cost for any of that. Now, if you want me to help you with your case, that takes away from the advocacy. So there's a phone number that you can call on the website, but that costs. But other than that, all the training's free. The Zoom call every month is free or every week is free. The group of going in there talking to all the other advocates, all of that is free. There is no cost for this whatsoever.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah. Well, let's talk a little bit then also about and and and let me point out this Robert doesn't get paid to do this. So Robert is working full-time. He does this, the side and the impact that this is having. So talk a little bit about that that um consulting also that that you're doing and and and how people can get a hold of you for that as well.
SPEAKER_01:So because I spent$700,000, I literally have that much knowledge in what you all are going through right now. And for years, for the last five to seven years, I've been helping tons of parents go through this. The problem is, as you will know, it takes hours of time to be able to do this, you know, to advocate for your case and whatever else. I can shorten your process. I just I had I even have right now attorneys calling me with their litigants to talk through strategy on where to go with this because a lot of them have never been through false allegations. They don't understand the nuances, and especially if you get a seasoned attorney, a lot of the people that I was against were board certified. So there's regular attorneys, and then the top 10% are board certified. The law firms I was going against were board certified. And so believe me, I know all the dirty tricks. We can shut them down very quickly, and we can get you possession back with your kids pretty quick. But you can just go to again RobertGarza.us, book a Zoom, and it gives you a calendar. You book whatever time you want, whether it's weekdays, weekends, whatever, after hours, it's all in there. So yeah.
SPEAKER_00:But that doesn't sound that's yeah, and so that's that's different, but I I that's important for that. There's a ton of dads listening, and we get guys every single week that are going through this, that are being alienated, haven't seen their kids for months, that are having challenges. So you provide some some expertise uh around that. And it's an it's an unfortunate expertise to have, right? If we any of us has experienced that, but it can be mitigated provided you take the right steps, and you just gotta you can't bury your head with it. I think it was the first thing that I would say, and you got to pay attention to some some things that are that are happening. And so as to your point, Robert, attorneys are not terrific at strategizing around this and mitigating this because it's uh 90, 90 plus percent of of cases get settled outside of court, and there's no issues like this. So it's only the small minority of cases that even go to court and go to trial. Uh, and it's an even smaller minority that have some of these issues that are that are going on. But they're real issues, and they're and and and they need to be addressed because they're damaging kids. So Robert can be a huge, huge asset and a resource around that as well. So support him in that if you've got that going on. Hopefully you don't, but it, but if you do, he can definitely help you out with that. And then also go to robertgarza.us and get involved in your state in getting these bills passed. And said it now five times at least. But there is just there, I so I've been doing this, Robert, for five years now. There are there's not another thing that I've seen that had can have such a quick and immediate impact on this family law uh system than what you're doing here. And you're a blessing to uh to having take taking this fight on. And it's not even really a fight, it's just refining a system that is meant to be good and and judicious and balanced and fair for everybody, but that gets manipulated because of just certain people. And so all you're doing is tightening those loopholes. And so the fight for tightening loopholes so that we can have uh a better process is just really fan and and brilliant, my friend. Absolutely brilliant how you've gone about doing this. So uh so go to robertgarza.us, get involved in that process. Robert, anything else that you want to say to the dads?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, if you go to my Facebook page, please watch all the reels. You'll understand the bills, why I did it, what they do, watch them several times because you might get confused. You know, Dr. Warren Farrell said something, he wrote the boy crisis. He said that there could be no other system designed to hurt the family more than the family court system in its present form. Let's change that.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, well, that's that's a good place to to leave it, and and we can have an impact on that uh just by by helping you through this process. Robert, thanks so much for being here. I sincerely appreciate it. Again, God bless you for the work that you're doing. I appreciate it. And we're gonna we're gonna have you up on our website as our trusted ally. So if people want information there, uh there'll be there'll be information in our show notes to get involved, uh, and we'll be keeping in touch with Robert as well. We'll be putting up his his day uh his weekly call so you can get on there if you just want to start at that. So we're just we're gonna be partnering with Robert to whatever extent we can to uh to help him through this process. So Robert, thank you. Thank you all.
