10. Tech-FREE survival tips, when kids are bored

No matter how much technology kids are allowed, they always seem to want more.

When it comes to finding ways to keep kids entertained without technology, there is a secret sauce to better results.

BY THE TIME YOU FINISH LISTENING, YOU’LL DISCOVER: 

• A new perspective on the power of boredom.
• The tools to empower entertainment, without technology.
• The secret to having more tech-free fun.

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1) Use this link for a FREE 20 min clarity call with Sustainable Parenting.

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Transcript

Flora McCormick: [00:00:00] You're listening to episode 10 of the Sustainable Parenting Podcast. Today we're talking about tech-free survival tips when your kids are bored, and whether it's summer or the holidays or a school break. There are so many opportunities where we can feel a little bit empty handed without. The use of putting our kid on an iPad.

But Fred, there are so many other ways that can serve you better, and I bet you've probably even seen that the more your child is around technology, the more you see upsets and frustration and short tempers coming out of your child. It's a common thing. I see time and time again. You end up in this cycle where you think it's the easiest way to entertain your child, and yet it makes the moments outside of technology use.

Way more difficult. So is that trade off really worth it? Or would you rather have a more sustainable, calm household with more cooperation? [00:01:00] If that's something you're looking for, today is the episode for you. Hello and welcome to the Sustainable Parenting Podcast. Let me tell you, friend, this place is different.

We fill that gap between gentle parenting and harsh discipline. That's really missing. To parent with kindness and firmness at the same time, and give you the exact steps to be able to parent in ways that are more realistic and effective. And for that reason, finally, feel sustainable. Welcome.

First, I wanna give a shout out to our listener of the week. We've gotten so many amazing reviews coming into the podcast, and I wanna highlight one of our most recent. Five star reviews. Beth Warner said, I'm a mother of four and I followed sustainable parenting for almost two years. I've always liked the no nonsense.

Flora [00:02:00] has always been honest and not sugarcoating things. The podcast is super helpful, concise, and I like how you can go back and listen to a certain episode when you need a refresher. I look forward to trying these tools and having a calmer house. Thank you so much, Beth, and send us a DM message so that we can get you a unique, sustainable parenting bonus.

And friends, as you listen to today's episode, if you find that is meaningful and valuable, please share it with a friend and or scroll down to the very bottom under your episode list to leave us a five star review. And share your experience. You may be highlighted in an upcoming episode and also receive a bonus

now, friend. Maybe you're like me. And when you had that sweet little baby, you said, I'm never gonna be one of those parents who puts their kid on an iPad [00:03:00] constantly. I'm never gonna be one that puts a movie on in a car during a road trip. We're gonna have. Family bonding time, or maybe you said, I'm not going to use TV as a babysitter.

Friend, I've been there. I certainly didn't think that I was gonna use technology as much as I ended up using it. I remember the pediatric association recommends kids not watching TV until age two, and I was freaking counting down the seconds, and I think even shaving off a couple of weeks or months to get to that finish line because I wanted the help of.

Knowing that my, that my kid would be happy while they were watching tv. And we started in with Daniel Tiger in some of the p b s episodes. And then we quickly moved into some, you know, little short movies. And now I'll be honest, it is a family favorite to have some Friday, Saturday, Sunday movie nights as a [00:04:00] family.

And it is this constant battle with our kids that they want more, they. Always want more. No matter what amount of technology use that they are given, there's always a request for more. So how do we negotiate that? How do you make it through so you're not in a constant negotiation with them and battling daily over technology or dealing with tantrums?

Every time you say that, it's time to turn it off. Today's the episode for you. So here's my best recommendation for you. First of all, please hear this with the most humility because I know how hard this is, but I've also seen it be so valuable. It's okay for kids to be bored. It's okay for our kids to experience lack of entertainment.

I mean, we live in a society where, you know, [00:05:00] YouTube is just like flip, flip, flip. This rewarding thing, this rewarding thing. Watch the next, watch the next, watch the next. And you know what that does to the brain friend. It just primes it to think. That you're always going to be getting something that's stimulating, something that's entertaining.

And so when our kids are given a lot of technology time that is so stimulating to the brain, so rewarding with entertainment, they get unplugged and then think the rest of life is sort of supposed to be that way. And it's such a drug of the way that it hits the dopamine system in their brain that that's part of why it gets hard for them to shut it off, especially if it's unpredictable.

And some days they get a ton of it and other days less. It is like a drug that they always want more of. It's hard to let go of and that they desire deeply and it's okay to let them experience detoxing from [00:06:00] that. It's okay to say I'm not gonna buy into that system of you just begging and pleading and seeming like you need it so badly that I'm gonna give it to you.

I am going to say it's okay for you to grow your struggle muscles, grow your creativity muscles, and those things only happen in a vacuum of entertainment. The chance to grow your creativity only happens. When it's a necessity.

So if you're frustrated that your child seems to not know how to self entertain or do anything on their own, unless it's technology, unfortunately, you have to unplug from the technology for their brain to have that space, the opportunity to develop those muscles of creativity and self entertainment.

And just be prepared that it is like a drug [00:07:00] you are gonna be like, they just can't do it. They'll sit there and just be like, I'm too bored. I have nothing to do. Nothing's fun. And it's brutal. It's painful because you just wanna solve it by like, okay, fine, here's the show, but next time you're tomorrow or after this, you need to find something to do without the iPad friend, you're just delaying the growth.

And if you can, if you can manage it internally, I want to suggest you think about it, like suffering with a purpose instead of suffering in circles. I love to talk to clients about this because in my work, when we're trying to change things in our parenting and in the patterns with kids, sometimes it does involve suffering.

But would you rather suffer in circles where it constantly never changes and there are battles and demands and they're doing it day after day? Or would you rather suffer with a purpose where they whine and cry because they're bored, but those muscles start growing, [00:08:00] the creativity starts to bloom.

I choose the second. And I've seen it on Christmas vacations and times when the kids are home, um, on a break or over the summer. If I can tolerate that initial pushback, that initial frustration. Mom, why can't you just give me something to entertain myself with the creativity bl blooms and blossoms and grows and.

Often it's even better in relationships too. There's less to fight over, less disagreements. It's just amazing how the brain can be so different with a little detox from technology. Now, again, I get it. You need sometimes, how else do I get my kid to be entertained when? I need something for them. Like, can you help me a little bit out here, flora.

And so first I wanna say it's not your job to entertain 'em. It's okay to give space for boredom, but I also will give you a couple ideas of my favorite tech-free ways for [00:09:00] kids to be able to have some fun. So here's the, the ideas that I love around tech-free ways that we can encourage some creativity and some fun and some playfulness.

The first is a pound of Play-Doh. And if you love the idea of Play-Doh, but you just think, I don't wanna have to make Play-Doh, or like, how would I have a pound of Play-Doh? Here's what I mean. I have created actually a little like store with my daughter where she sells Play-Doh and we only deliver it locally because it's way too expensive to try to ship.

So here's the thing around a pound of Play-Doh. A pound of Play-Doh does not mean you get a bunch of those little tiny things from the store that get kind of dry and crusty and are like hard to deal with. My favorite thing, I've been doing it since my kids were too, is to make homemade Play-Doh with this one specific recipe that I really love, and I'll put it in the show notes.

And with [00:10:00] that recipe, I make a giant batch in one color. And just let them enjoy that with super simple tools, not the squeeze things that get all difficult and all complicated stuff. Give them kitchen utensils. Give them a butter knife. Give them toothpicks. Give them like anything from your kitchen drawer.

Forks. All of those tend to be more interesting and they'll play longer with them than those little complicated toys that come from the Play-Doh company. Personally, that's how I feel. Um, and if you're local here in Bozeman, my daughter does make batches of this and sells it as her little seven year old's entrepreneurial journey.

So I'll put a link for that as well. Another key area to entertain kids tech free is water. Now, obviously in a safe way, we're not gonna leave a baby in a bathtub, but sometimes we only think of bath time at night and only for cleanliness. But our toddlers love [00:11:00] bath time. So if you're having a really rough day and you don't know any other way that you could just have a bit of sanity.

You could consider putting them in the bathtub. You can do some fun little extra things like, I like to call it disco bath, where we turn off the lights and they have access to like, um, a flashlight sitting on the side of the counter so they, it won't get in the water, but it just shines like a fun light.

Or you can get a colorful flashlight from the dollar store, um, or those glow sticks can be popped in there maybe with the lights off and kind of makes it fun. But water play in the tub or a water table outside, or even if you just have a big pot or um, plastic container that you can put a bunch of water in and give the kids some bath toys and go out onto your back porch or anywhere for them to be able to play in water.

Another key area is dumping. Kids love to pour from one cup, not dumping, pouring, excuse me. They love to [00:12:00] pour water or pour sand or pour rice. So if you do, if it's not feasible to do this with water, you could have rice in a bucket that they're practicing, pouring or feeling in their hands. So anything that's got that essence of water.

Can be a great tech free way for kids to entertain for a bit. And a third area that I really love is involve them useful. Involve them. Useful in what you're doing. Sometimes you think I just gotta keep you entertained over there so I can get done X. If it's emptying the dishwasher or making dinner. If there's any way you can involve the child, my goodness, that serves the purpose.

Twofold. A, they're more likely to not be getting into trouble or whining or complaining, and B, you get to have some connection and bonding time and contribute to that sense of them having a feeling of significance and belonging. [00:13:00] And, and we started this as soon as kids were like one and a half or two, you can give them like a salad spinners, a super wonderful tool where kids feel like they're helping with dinner and he would push, push, push on that little top button that makes the things spin.

And that felt so entertaining. And I'd be like, can you tear up the salad for us? And he would tear, tear, tear. Um, you know, lettuce is a pretty cheap thing to buy at the store, so you could even, you know, if. Lot more gets ripped up than you actually end up using. Maybe that's okay. Peeling is a really fun way to involve kids.

Um, I remember when my daughter first started, she would peel that darn carrot all the way down to like a toothpick I'D stick. Great. Thank you. But again, carrots are relatively inexpensive and I could maybe sacrifice one carrot going all the way down to that for her to be able to feel like she was contributing to the carrots that were needed for that dinnertime.

So involve them useful. Also, folding is a great way to involve kids or wiping [00:14:00] things. Having a spray bottle that has like water and vinegar and you can buy 'em at the dollar store. Every dollar store I've ever been to has spray bottles and have that. That plus a rag be a way that children can help contribute and feel like they're helping you clean while you're sweeping, mopping, doing the things that like you really wanna have done.

Right. It's okay if they maybe get some things wet and the. Sliding glass door or the refrigerator face or the oven face. Um, even cabinet faces perhaps. So three Keyways, play-Doh, pound of play-Doh is my favorite water or involving them useful. And of course unstructured play, like going outside and just trusting that they can figure something to do is another bonus.

I think it's often we think that we have to have a toy or an equipment in order for there to be fun, but outside so many pieces of nature can become toys if we just give our kids the opportunity. [00:15:00] I'll never forget one camping trip that we were on and. Our kids, literally at the age of like four and six, spent an entire day of the camping trip just trying to dig up these like really huge rocks that were at parts of the bumpy campground dirt.

And we made sure we filled them back in afterwards, but they would just, you know, chip at it with random things that we had in the trailer to be able to like. Try to dig out these big rocks in the dirt. It's amazing what kids can do with less structure, less equipment, really. Less is often more. And I bet you have a bunch of cool examples as well.

So I wanna remind you, we do have a sustainable parenting Facebook group and also an Instagram page. I'll make sure there's a post in those areas around tech-free survival. And would love for you to add your [00:16:00] ideas. What are your additional ideas that help you guys to survive when the kids are bored in a tech free way?

And please be sure to join us again on our next episode, which will be how to react like the most patient mom in the world. See you next time.