By Faith Tammy: Braving the Night, a Faith-Filled Journey Through Domestic Violence

Adopt a child affected by domestic violence for Christmas 2023

How do you find hope and healing in the face of unimaginable tragedy? With us today is Tammy Willet, a domestic violence survivor, angel mom, and an example of unshakable faith amid adversity. Tammy fearlessly shares her journey, posing a challenge to listeners about maintaining faith even when life's plan seems unclear. As we explore her story, the resilience in faith will leave you questioning, how can one remain steadfast even when the path of life is shrouded in darkness?

Imagine being in a relationship where faith and hope become your only solace. Tammy bravely recounts her struggles with her husband's escalating addiction and how it tested her self-esteem and faith. Her story serves as a stark reminder that in the darkest times, having faith sparks hope and initiates healing. You'll find yourself captivated by her account of faith, resilience, and survival, discovering the intertwined roles of belief and optimism in overcoming the most challenging life circumstances.

Domestic violence leaves a profound impact on families and survivors. Through Tammy's gut-wrenching narrative of losing her daughter to domestic violence and finding solace in the work of Break the Silence Against Domestic Violence, listeners would comprehend the depth of this issue. Now serving as the Legacy Families Director, Tammy's experience is a testament to faith leading to action. While deeply emotional, her story is a beacon of hope, underlining the importance of support organizations and community in the healing journey. You are seen, you are known, and you are loved. Remember, every dark cloud has a silver lining. So join us and be inspired by Tammy's extraordinary journey of faith and resilience.

You ARE:
SEEN KNOWN HEARD LOVED VALUED

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

To be standing or sitting up here and singing a song that I wrote, actually on the honeymoon of being my wife, melissa, before she went to be with Jesus. To sing this with my wife now a beautiful wife and to say words like I will walk by faith, even when I cannot see, because this broken road prepares your will for me. And to be in front of you guys and sit with my wife and to see how faithful God has been and to think about how my daughter is asleep right now in the back and how much joy it's brought me. And you know, being from that time in my life when it was the most hurtful, I was in the deepest, darkest pit of despair I've ever been in my life, you know, and hurting. Saying you know God, why, why would you take someone that I love so much and we were only married for four months and cancer at a very young age? Why would that happen? And all these questions that would come in my mind.

Speaker 1: 1:07

And even after she went to be with the Lord, I remembered just being angry even and saying you know God, I don't even want to read the Bible because there's parts when it says that you heal and I get mad. Why didn't you heal my wife and you know I throw the Bible across the room, just being very honest, you know I'd be very upset and God would just speak to me through so many just different scriptures in my life, you know one being who are called to walk by faith and not by sight. I remember saying God why, why? And all these questions, and saying I don't understand. I just want to know why. Just tell me why. And the answer he gave me, which is not one I really wanted to hear, he said I don't want you to know why, because if you did, it wouldn't really be walking by faith, would it? I want you to learn to walk by faith. I want you to learn and encourage people in those difficult times that they can trust in the Lord with all their heart and lean not on understanding and all their ways to acknowledge me, the Lord speaking to me and I just the scriptures Proverbs 3, 5 and 6 and understanding that he knows every hair that's upon our head. He does love us.

Speaker 1: 2:17

When I was going through that time and I was upset and I was hurting realizing that he does love us, he died for me, he gave everything for me. He said that he thinks of us more than the sands of the sea, so of course he loves us. He thinks about us all the time. I want to encourage you and whatever's going on in your life and here or later somebody watches this whatever, just trust in him and take steps even baby steps Sometimes it takes and watch him. Be faithful, each step that you take. And now I can share how God has been so faithful. The singing with my wife is called Walk by Faith. The song's called Walk by Faith.

Speaker 2: 3:20

The fundamental fact of existence is that this trusting God, this faith, is the firm foundation under which everything that makes life worth living. It is our handle on what we can't see. The act of faith is what distinguishes our ancestors, it's what sets them above the crowd. Hey everybody, and welcome to the Wednesdays with Watson Podcast. This is our first episode in our by Faith series. There is a by Faith Hall of Fame, and it is found in Hebrews, chapter 11.

Speaker 2: 4:07

Our goal here, though, over the next little while, is to investigate faith, especially as it pertains to those who have experienced trauma. Why do some people keep the faith? Why do some people walk away from the faith? And so, welcome to the by Faith series, and we are going to be talking to people who have held on to their faith. We will be talking to people who did not hold on to their faith. Why do some keep the faith?

Speaker 2: 4:41

I'm here to tell you, as a trauma survivor, that faith in the star of the story is the only way that I could have gotten through anything that I did. Do I understand it? Absolutely not, but we are going to take the deep dive, and so today is our first episode with not only a domestic violence, survivor, but also an angel mom. Her daughter was murdered in a domestic violence incident, and so I'd love for you to drop into this conversation with Tammy. Did she keep the faith? Why did she keep the faith? What made her keep the faith and does sometimes she still not want to keep the faith? Let's drop into this conversation with my friend Tammy. Okay, guys, I am here today with Tammy Oulet. Tammy is a survivor sister of mine and she is going to be breaking her silence in some ways today, and we are starting a brand new episode series called by Faith. And so, by Faith, tammy today is going to tell us her story. So, tammy, welcome to the Wednesdays with Watson Podcast.

Speaker 3: 5:55

Thank you, I'm excited to be here.

Speaker 2: 5:57

We are excited to have you. We are excited to have you, tammy. We are working together right now and we'll talk about this a little bit at the end of the episode. So, guys, make sure that you stay tuned at the end of the episode because we are doing some exciting work for a Christmas family right now, as it pertains to the topic of today's conversation. But I'm going to allow Tammy to tell her story through some careful questioning. Guys, I do want you to know that this episode does contain some difficult subject matter, as Tammy is both a survivor of domestic violence herself and she is an angel mom. And what does that mean? That means that she lost a child to domestic violence. So, tammy, thank you for being here today.

Speaker 2: 6:37

As we step into this conversation and this whole goal of this series, of this podcast, is, I want to know why do some people who have suffered loss like you, why do some people keep the faith and why don't? And why do some people walk away? So I think my first and our scripture is out of Hebrews, chapter 11 where is the most common? I call it the, the Hebrews chapter 11 Hall of Fame, but by faith. And then the Lord decides to put a name. And if the Bible were still being written today, I wonder how many of us would be in the Hebrews chapter 11 Hall of Fame. So I'm curious. We know that from that scripture that faith is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen. That's a cool. I mean, that's a Bible verse. But faith means something different to everybody, and especially in different seasons of their lives. And so, tammy, I want to start the podcast by asking you what does faith mean to you?

Speaker 3: 7:39

Faith and hope are intertwined. You can't have one without the other. So, to me, as faith is believing, believing that there's something, after believing that there's a creator of the universe, my God, I choose to call him God, my Father. It's faith and hope is believing that there's something greater than all of us and I don't try not to judge people when it doesn't matter what religion is. It's not about religion, it's about a relationship with your higher power Agreed, yeah, and so faith.

Speaker 2: 8:19

I love that you said that, and especially kicking off this series, that faith and hope are intertwined. Right, and the Bible tells us, hope deferred makes a heart sick, and so that leads us back to faith like knowing. And when you read Hebrews, chapter 11, you know by faith Noah, by faith Abraham, by faith Isaac, by faith Jacob, and so, yeah, they had to have had a hope in what was promised to them, and so I think you're absolutely right that faith and hope have to be intertwined, especially when you experience loss and trauma, and this is where I want you to begin to tell us your story. And so you have the unfortunate double Dutch trauma of domestic violence, and so I want to first start off by talk to us a little bit about your own journey with domestic violence and where you are today personally as it pertains to those things.

Speaker 3: 9:14

I was not, not Saved at that point in my time that I was being abused. I didn't have a relationship with God. It's not that I ever doubted, because I grew up in a family that had a Lutheran minister and a Baptist minister and I'm gonna cost a preacher or my uncles, oh, I mean, I grew up knowing Christ was, but I was not. I had never given my life to Lord, I'd never invited him into my heart and said the first salvation. I Was just kind of, but I knew who God was. And it wasn't that I didn't believe, I just I knew, but I wasn't ever. You know, once I became an adult I stopped going to church. I had met my husband. I was single mom with two kids by two different dads, and I was the joke of the family. And no, my daddy never got arrested, so I didn't mean it. But he would be like, oh, how long is this one gonna stick around? He actually had me believing in my mind that nobody was ever gonna love me Because I already had two kids. Who's gonna love this lady who's 30, now 30 something, two children out of wedlock by two different fathers. And he made jokes. Your dad, well, oh you know, stuck with me and in my heart and in my spirit.

Speaker 3: 10:32

I just I had received that, and my daddy never meant to hurt me, but my belief in that I was Worthy of being loved Was practically nothing. He was teasing but my heart to get serious. So when my ex came along and asked me to marry him, he wasn't a super good-looking guy. I Not really sure why I married him. I think that I married him because he was the first guy that I asked yeah, and I was. I didn't want to be that single mom for the rest of my life. So at the time I think I loved him, but now not so much. Well, he was a whole. He was a drunk.

Speaker 3: 11:15

I can't remember he would. You know, when we lived in our hometown he would get drunk and we would all be together with my girlfriends. I mean, I drank at the time but I always ended up having to be the driver should we stop? And he was just a stupid drunk in the beginning, was just dumb. He would get drunk and black out. He was just embarrassing. I Would send him out drinking with my girlfriends. I was like, no, I'm staying home, but do not bring him home. You keep him with you for you feet. You're gonna take him out and getting drunk. You guys keeping with you, because I don't want to deal with he would come in and wake me up just to pick an argument. And it was just. He was stupid. That's how I looked at it at the time.

Speaker 3: 11:58

Well, he had originally moved from Maine to Texas to meet his biological father for the first time. Well, his father ended up not being such a great dad and he drank and is drinking. After we got married really escalated and I think he wanted to move to Florida where his twin brother and older brother brother lived and I was like, okay, maybe that would make him happy if you were closer to the family that love it. You know, I was that fixer. I wanted to fix him. Yeah, well, moving. We packed up all of our stuff, we moved to St Petersburg, florida and Ellis County so we went there and things escalated from there. That was the biggest mistake. I could not keep a job because he would call up there 15 times during an eight-hour shift. He, you know, instead of a long time. It was verbal abuse and calling me names and I Just thought of it as a mean drug.

Speaker 3: 12:54

When we moved to Florida he got with his brothers. That drinking escalated To the point of him putting me up against a wall on my throat, which my, my children witnessed it. Brandy was 15 and my son was 12 and we were just like, and I knew that if he went out drinking, you know we could just if he would just be still and pass out, everything would be okay. So I can't remember putting my two kids in the car. I was a driver ramp and just one time I just pulled into the target parking lot, took an app because it was like just giving them time to be still so They'll go to sleep, there's nothing going on and then there won't be an argument. But it escalated really, really quick. He worked tonight so he had it in his head that I was cheating on him and I was like I don't know anybody here. He was going through my phone. It was just ridiculous, I didn't know anybody.

Speaker 3: 13:51

He would get in the car and leave me and the kids there and be gone for days and go stay at his brothers. We had no food, I had no access to the money and he would come home and laugh about it that I gave Brandy and Sean whatever there was in the cabinet. I went without food. You know he used to think he would come home drunk and Think that, that, you know, was funny. One night we were next door at the neighbors and he locked us out of the house. When was we ended up having to camp out at the neighbors house? He was into a lot of stuff, but the day that he put me up against the wall, my mind, for two people happened to witness it my neighbors across the hallway in our apartment, and they called 911. He went to jail and then his mother calls and said why aren't you gonna go get him? What do you think I did?

Speaker 2: 14:47

Absolutely. And I wanted to stop here just for a second because if you're on the other end of this, if you're listening to our voices, what she just said, that she did, is very common, very, very common, and we're gonna provide some resources at the end of this episode for you to understand that. That doesn't have to be your story. But I didn't mean to interrupt you, tammy, except for I want, I want, I want Sorry, I want survivors who are listening to know that this is common.

Speaker 3: 15:14

I Went back. I went and got him out of jail. You know I Did what every domestic violence survivor has done, and we take them back. Then things just kept getting worse. You can remember him holding my head in the pillow and Punching me in the back of the head, so he didn't leave any bruises.

Speaker 3: 15:36

There was a sexual assault and he thought because you're married we were married, me saying no, I don't want to do that, please don't do that, stop, stop. Didn't have any. He had no limitations when he was drunk, and so there was a lot of sexual abuse. I didn't even want us be in the same room with him a little long. Be intimate with it, right.

Speaker 2: 15:59

So so he goes to jail. You get him out. It continues. He clearly, you know, got the DSM behind me. Those of you and you on YouTube can see the book, but the DSM is just like I could, I could probably turn the narcissistic, you know disorder right now and you would probably be like, yeah, that's him. So you went back and he continues to be a narcissist and he continues to abuse. Where are you in your faith journey about this time?

Speaker 3: 16:27

During that time I don't even think that I thought about faith at all. I felt isolated. I felt doomed, terrified and fed up. The kids had come to Texas to visit their dad and he beat me so bad that night and I told him you're never gonna hit me again and if I were you I wouldn't go to sleep time. And I'm not proud of this part, amy, and you can edit this out if you choose.

Speaker 3: 16:54

I Sat at the end of the bed in a metal folding chair and waited for him to go to sleep and when he started snoring this really whiny, annoying snore that he had I'm not real proud of this I fall back. I Pulled that bad out of my son's aluminum baseball bat from underneath that and I knew that if I didn't break his leg I better make it good to me, because If he gets a hold of you he's gonna kill me. I did break his leg Along, with a few other bones with that and he said take me to the hospital. He's bleeding everywhere. I was a no walk because when he went to sleep that night, when I told him don't go to sleep, he said good night, the IT.

Speaker 3: 17:42

I was like good night. So I fought back that night. He couldn't get to me. I Could not refuse to call for help. I called his twin brother and I said come and get him, come and get your brother and don't bring him back here. And I had already planned on leaving and had been doing the back work at that point to get us out of there. Because in and Any situation to get in a domestic violence situation I know in the state of Florida because we had a police report that gave me relocation funds.

Speaker 3: 18:17

Wow so the kids were home by then and we had a friend verse from Houston area come down and pick us up with a low bowie trailer and I told my abusers twin brother, if you bring him back here before this date he will go to jail and I'm not getting him out again. So we packed up and we left. We came back to Texas. I started going. I had been so stressed out that one of my friends from my kid's childhood had invited me to come to church with him and it was a non-denominal national church and they were actually holding church in an old bar and the building used to be a bar that back in my wild days I drank at, and that's where they were having church.

Speaker 3: 19:04

And they were having women's Bible study and I can remember it was some kind of sandwich and I hadn't eaten it, I just couldn't. So stressed out. And I can remember it was so peaceful there and I sat at that women's group and I ate and food tasted good and it stayed down and I was like I just need to bring my food right here and sit on the steps and just eat every meal here, Because I knew then there was that place, gave me peace and comfort and I was finally able to eat and breathe. I slept that night like I hadn't slept before.

Speaker 3: 19:42

I continued to go to that Bible study and I wanted to know Jesus. I wanted to know this man who died on the cross for me. I wanted to know him better. I wanted more. So I dug deep. My mentor, my friend. She led me to the Lord and she has always been there for me through thick and thin she's still, even when I was making mistakes. So she led me to the Lord. I was going to church. Then I was working at a gas station Right off of the highway. Who, do you think, walked in? Oh no.

Speaker 3: 20:22

I'm in the middle of a shift. I've already got a home for me and the kids. Here comes my abuser, walking in the gas station. I was like and he hugged me and cried and said I left everything I owned in Florida. I had to be with you and the kids. He would have never found me if I had not been working at that gas station. I believed him. Oh, he must really love me. Took him back.

Speaker 2: 20:46

Oh my gosh.

Speaker 3: 20:49

For about another three months and then I sent him packing. But I took him back. I believed him. The reality of the fact is that when he was extremely drunk and when he sobered up, he was closer to Texas than he was to turn around and go back to Florida. Yeah. But I was dumb enough to believe it.

Speaker 2: 21:11

Well, and again I think it's, I mean like I'm actually shocked to hear that you took him back after all of that and there's a lot to unpack there. And these episodes, the by faith Tammy episodes, are going to be two episodes, because we can not possibly cover her faith journey as a domestic violence survivor and also as an angel mom in one episode. So this episode we are definitely focusing on your journey with domestic violence because it deserves as does Brandy's story, it deserves its own space and so there's a lot to unpack there for the listeners, right? And so you didn't know, you didn't know the Lord, and that's when you were telling that story of the baseball. But and I don't mean to laugh, I really don't it's probably terrible, but it reminded me of that movie, that fair faucet movie, the burning bed, where, like she legitimately just burns him in the house and leaves because he, she has just had it, and so I think, survivors out there, that's where we get pushed. My story I didn't get pushed that way because it's not my makeup and so my anger got turned very inside and my health and all of that was heavily affected. I was I never was able to get it out, Not that I am a proponent of breaking people's legs with baseball bats, but I understand, and I think that the listeners out there understand, and so what is really interesting to me, though, is so then you went to church and you said I wanted to know more about this Jesus, let's dive into that for a second because you had no reason to want to know more about the God of the universe.

Speaker 2: 22:50

You had no reason Like.

Speaker 2: 22:52

You had a decent childhood, sounds like, but then you had this you had two children, now of wedlock, which I know brings a lot of shame, and I want to say to you today, even though that was so many years ago, that shame wants us to think that we are the mistake, not that we made the mistake, and so, again I'm talking to listeners out there, the one of you that's got the earbud in, hoping your abuser's not hearing this episode you are not broken because you are not fitting some stereotypical picture of what the world tells you, or even the Bible, and this terrible, terrible stage of your life, the fact that you have two children out of wedlock, is inconsequential.

Speaker 2: 23:36

God does not care, and so a lot of people, Tammy and I wonder if you agree with me who have made mistakes and I air quote when I say that you weren't even a Christian but have had children out of wedlock, or who have done drugs, or who have hit back in the domestic violence situations, they began to feel shame. And then am I right in that your value just continues to get diminished.

Speaker 3: 24:03

Yes, and he came to church with me. We were trying to work it out, but it was obvious that he couldn't change and I couldn't fix it. And my pastor there. Just if you want to work on this marriage, you need to do it separately. And that's when we separated into horses.

Speaker 3: 24:25

I never explained to my children why we left Florida like we did. It was very quiet, we didn't tell anybody what was going on. I had a home in the middle of nowhere set up for us here in Texas. We came back home where things were normal, where we knew people, where we had a support system, and my church became a huge, great portion of my life. I was that mother that every time the church doors were open, I was in ministry, I was in the doors because I'm a recovering addict through several things, but my addiction was to prescription ads. If we don't, it's really easy. I'll get into that a little more later, but I'm a recovering addict. I always will be. I just choose not to use. God has a very big sense of humor because now I take like three high blood pressure pills and a heart pill, the person who can't take medicine. I'm like God. That's oh, that's funny.

Speaker 2: 25:27

But yeah, it is, and I think addiction also speaking to listeners is very common in these situations. My listeners know and for those of you who just dropped in on this podcast, an addiction to pain pills is a huge part of my story, especially when I left my domestic violence situation. But I do wanna contend, I wanna go back because I really wanna know. The answer to this question is you did not know him. You knew about God because of uncles and things of that nature. You walked away from the church when you left home or when you had your children. You enter into this domestic violence marriage. That's terrible and you deal with that and you do some things that you're not proud of and all of the things.

Speaker 2: 26:08

But then suddenly, somehow, some way, you go I wanna know about Jesus. I wanna know that story Like, how did you? Because most people would be like I don't wanna know about God because if God is all he said he is, then he wouldn't have allowed this to happen. Do you remember that still small voice or that prick of your heart when you said when your friend invited you to that church and you felt the peace and you ate food and, by the way, this is how we reach people, we feed them, we house them, we clothe them, we love them. But do you? I wanna know this story. How did you want, why did you wanna know more about Jesus when you had just gone through so much?

Speaker 3: 26:49

Because he reached in and grabbed my heart. I mean it almost felt like a. There was such a drawing, you know, because there was so much joy in that church and so much authenticity and they were just normal people, just like me. Yeah, the pastor of that church was an old addict. He was a football coach, high school football coach, before he ever became a menace pastor. And we I had actually moved in. My daughter went to live with her dad. I had a little bit I moved in upstairs about my pastor's home. He had renovated we called it the White House. He had renovated the entire upstairs of this big, huge house into efficiency apartments. So my son and I went live there and I didn't, you know they just they nurtured me and they, they taught me. He gave me some great advice on life and a lot of what he taught us was just really good stuff and it was teaching.

Speaker 3: 27:53

I wanted to learn. I still love learning, especially when it doesn't cost me anything and I doesn't need a heartache. But I just felt like I needed, I wanted a desire to know Christ more. I you know when the altar call was given that Sunday and I just went up there and I was on my knees and I was just sobbing because I just, lord, please fix the pieces inside of me that were broken. We would have Thursday night prayer and that prayer group. We would be in church on Thursday I think it was on Thursday. You just wanted to know more. I wanted to know what gave everybody else that great joy, even in bad situations. I just I wanted that. I wanted what everybody else had that was around me.

Speaker 2: 28:51

Well, and you hit on a. We haven't mentioned this for a while on this podcast, but we say this podcast has three C's church, community counseling and of course we highlight Jesus, who is the star of the story. And, Tammy, it is so refreshing to hear that you found a church where you wanted their Jesus.

Speaker 3: 29:15

I didn't feel judged. I could let them see the real me. And you know it was very much a hospital for the centers. It was not a country club for the believers, this place and this church group and I was there for many years, I think oh gosh, four years. My daughter, brandy, would go to church with these a few times, but she was that, she was teenage, just 15, 16. My son, I'll never forget the day we were driving home from church and he said you know, mom, when you die and go to heaven. I said yes, he's any, was excited. He said when I die, I'm going to see you there. And I pulled the car over and I just he was so excited. I didn't know how to pay my bills, I didn't know how to do a budget. My pastor's wife, they truly just wrapped their arms around me and taught me so much. Some of it you know I didn't necessarily agree with. People still talk poorly about that church and since we've moved away. But they were just the real deal.

Speaker 2: 30:30

Well, and look, that is the message here, is it? Our stories are so similar as eerie, but, but again, it was for me. Now, I became a Christian when I was 15 years old, but, but in terms of my domestic violence and where a church and a community came alongside of me was also a Wednesday night Bible study, and I have very close friends still to this day. But if you are listening to Tammy's story, guys, so my whole motivation and direction of this series, this by faith series, as we evaluate the Hebrews 11 Hall of Fame, where, where the Bible says you know, faith is the substance of things, hope for in the evidence of things not seen. And so, tammy, had you judged God on the things that you saw, you would not want him. I mean, well, let me rephrase that, because you did judge God on the things that you saw with the people. But but if you decided whether or not you wanted to step into faith and the complete work of Jesus on the cross, based on your circumstances and there were more to come right, and we're going to talk about that on the next podcast. There's another major thing that happened where I can't wait to hear where your faith was on that.

Speaker 2: 31:45

But as we close this particular episode where we're talking about your story and you came to know the Lord and you held on to your faith because of his people, because of a community, because you wanted their joy, and so, if you're out there listening, the Tammies and Amies of the world are walking in your churches.

Speaker 2: 32:07

I know the very first time I walked into Calvary Church in Clearwater, florida, I sat in the very back row of the church, walked out, didn't speak to his soul. We are in your churches, we are in your Bible studies, we are in your outreach programs and lots of people right now will blame God for trauma. And, tammy, your story is very interesting to me that it drove you to want to know more about Jesus and not drive you away from a higher power that could have done something to help or put you further into addiction. And so, as we close this, this part one of the podcast, I would love it if you would just think for a second and I'm a YouTube listener, as you can tell I'm literally staring up at the sky. But, tammy, if you had a message to somebody with an earbud in their ear right now, with their abuser laying right beside them and they don't know. Jesus, what is your message to them?

Speaker 3: 33:08

That there's somebody greater than you and I. We can be the mouthpiece of Christ, but there's someone greater than I, greater than you you have. Our Heavenly Father loves us so much and if religion tells you that God hates the wars, all of that cliche stuff, please just know that God we surveyed God of second chances as in, he gives us a chance after chance after chance. So, no matter what you've done, he still loves you. His son still died on the cross for you and he's calling your name. He wants better for you than what is happening in your life right now. There's so much more that he wants to bless you with.

Speaker 3: 34:00

So, even when you pray, when you're talking to God, just talk to him. You don't have to have all the fancy words, it doesn't have to be this perfect prayer. Cry out, because I promise, when you cry out to Christ, he hears you. Stay safe. And when it's your time, use the safety plan, reach out to resources, reach out, and Christ is going to keep you safe. So reach out to Jesus and all you have to do is say a simple prayer in your mind. Let him in, say Lord, I love you, I need you. Come into my heart and guide me in the ways that are good and he will. He's faithful guys, he's so faithful.

Speaker 2: 34:49

I could not agree more and I think that anyone who knows any part of my story knows that he has been faithful. All of my life he has been faithful, and I listened to that song a lot. It's one of my favorite most played songs in 2022, the goodness of God. And when I hear CC Wyman's her voice all my life he has been faithful. All of my life he has been so, so good.

Speaker 2: 35:12

Sometimes, tammy, those traumatic memories will pop up in my mind. And he was still good. And if you're out there asking Amy, how can you ask that? Make sure you are following this podcast, because we are going to talk about this with people all over the world, some of whom did not hang onto their faith. But let me tell you that Isaiah 55 says that his ways are higher, his ways are better, his ways are stronger, and I know, if you're the person laying in the bed with an earbud, lying next to your abuser, you cannot understand what we are talking about. But keep it here, because we got nothing but hope coming for you.

Speaker 2: 35:54

Because, tammy, I was thinking the other day as we close out here. I was thinking the other day I don't know if you are like me and at night, you have your phone and you're scrolling up on Instagram Reels and on TikTok, and TikTok in particular, has a lot of creators who are ill, who are dying, and so I was watching this TikTok the other day and they were like there's no hope. We've called in the family and the person was very, very ill and as I was scrolling it and I knew that my faith that took such a hit and my story has been healed. Because the first thing that popped in my mind when I thought this story, these people on the TikTok video said there's no hope. The doctors are given no hope, and the first thing I thought in my mind was but wait, but God, we always have hope, and so that's how faith and hope are intertwined.

Speaker 2: 36:57

So, before we end this episode, I do wanna talk quickly, because you just mentioned about reach out to resources. I want to speak quickly about some things that we have going on together, you and I. So you work for an organization called Break the Silence Against Domestic Violence. That is an organization that I worked with a few years ago and walked away for that for reasons that you understand.

Speaker 2: 37:19

However, tammy works for them now and we have adopted a family and it is all over my Facebook and Instagram where you can help this family. There are Amazon wish list are there, but this family of four his mom was killed by her husband and, I believe, the children's father I'm not sure if it was all four of their fathers but so they're orphans and we are helping them for Christmas. But tell us a little bit more about Break the Silence Against Domestic Violence and just give me, like your best 30, 45 second pitch where they can find Break the Silence Against Domestic Violence if they wanna support or support an angel family, that because we got this family on lockdown by the time people hear this episode on Wednesday of this week, that family, we will be done with that family. However, on my link tree I will have a link for you guys to help Break the Silence Against Domestic Violence to sponsor a family for Christmas. And so tell us a little bit about Break the Silence Against Domestic Violence and how they can sponsor an angel family.

Speaker 3: 38:24

This organization literally saved my life. They came along at a time later on, after my daughter's death, and that's a whole nother story, whole nother topic. But they came alongside me during that worst, while I was a grieving parent, and they lifted me up. They reminded me of a dolphin pod you can find our website at Breakthesilencetvorg and I realized that there was hope. There were survivors like myself. I wasn't alone. There were grieving parents like myself who were not alone, and I volunteered with them for 10 or 11 years now, and about a year and a half ago they opened a position for our legacy families director. And what does the legacy family director do? I work directly with families that have lost somebody to domestic violence specifically, and we call those children angel babies. So we have our holidays of hope program going on right now, and we have opened that up to survivor sisters as well. So survivor sisters are putting their children on our program and we hope to get each child sponsored. At this point, I have about 149 kids that need to be sponsored.

Speaker 2: 39:42

Okay, you guys hear that 149 kids that need to be sponsored for Christmas and it's only like a $35 commitment, right, Hammy?

Speaker 3: 39:49

Yes, ma'am, you could. If they go to our website and then click on join and support us, it'll bring a drop down screen and then it will say you will see holidays. I hope there you can click on that. Then you can scroll down and you will see a line of three, three blocks on it. One is to donate and download a free calendar. The other is donating the amount, but the best one, the one that I love, is to adopt a child for the Christmas season and then shop to your drop. Let's do it, y'all.

Speaker 2: 40:23

Let's do it shop to your drop, which we're having a lot of fun doing with this family.

Speaker 3: 40:28

You know these children. They are the silent victims of domestic violence. They have either lost a parent or they witnessed it, yeah, so they need help and if we can get every child on this list adopted, I have until December 13th to get them all adopted. If not, then the organization will purchase one $35 gift for each child. So I'm gonna encourage you to get every baby adopted. It's important to me.

Speaker 2: 40:55

Yeah, guys, it's important to me too, and so I'm gonna put. The very first thing you're going to see when you see the show notes in this episode is the link, the direct link, to adopt a child. I would love to come back when we because Tammy's by faith episodes are going to be at least two, so I'd love to come back in two weeks and tell you that where we've gained, it is December the fourth, the day we're recording this. This will go live on December the 6th. That means we've got seven days to get 140 kids sponsored. So please head to that link, Tammy, we are gonna come back with you here in two weeks because you had an angel baby, and we're gonna talk about it.

Speaker 2: 41:41

We're gonna talk about what that meant for your faith good, bad or indifferent. So, guys, come back in two weeks here for the by faith series. We are in the by faith Tammy episodes. I do hope that you have a Merry Christmas and before I close this episode, I'm going to say the same thing I say to everybody. You guys know, if I get a microphone in front of me, I say it and, tammy, I wanna proclaim it over you you are seen, you are known, you are heard, you are loved and you're so, so valued. Guys, merry Christmas, go hit that link. We'll be back in two weeks with the rest of Tammy's story ["You have Pulled Me Out from the Depths"].

Speaker 4: 42:52

["you have Pulled Me Out from the Depths"]. ["you have Pulled Me Out from the Depths"]. ["you have Pulled Me Out from the Depths"].