Every time we hear someone say "It is what it is", we realize that person no longer is looking for solutions or options. This is an easy cop out saying that limits beliefs and stops the brain from looking for choices. It means they have allowed themselves to give up and just live with it the way it is no matter the outcome. It is time to make a change and look for answers. It is possible the people you look toward for help were not the right people with enough knowledge to help you out. Never give up and never surrender!