Ever caught yourself playing the dangerous game of comparison, especially on the rocky road of recovery and personal growth? You're not alone. This episode is a heartfelt confessional about our shared struggle with 'comparisonitis.' I open up about the pitfalls of measuring our individual healing against someone else's, revealing how this can hinder the very progress we seek. With anecdotes from my own life and the wisdom hard-earned through years of navigating sobriety, I offer up a candid exploration of why your unique journey is not just valid but vital.
We often overlook the strength that lies in our personal stories, and yet, they are the very threads that weave the rich tapestry of human experience. This episode is a celebration of that tapestry, an affirmation that by embracing and sharing our individual narratives, we spark joy and gratitude in ourselves and others. It's a reminder that our paths, no matter how divergent, have the power to inspire and support the community around us. So if you find yourself needing a lifeline or simply a dose of camaraderie, remember: assistance is always close at hand, and together, our mission is nothing short of building better humans—one story at a time.
For over 50 years, Harmony Foundation has worked as a nonprofit to serve those seeking recovery from substance addictions. Our residential and intensive outpatient programs are in a collaborative and respectful treatment environment with multiple specialty tracks offering additional support. Our main campus is nestled on a 43-acre campus in the Rocky Mountains just outside of Estes Park, Colorado, that promotes physical, emotional, and spiritual healing. With one of the most robust alumni programs in the county, clients remain connected and empowered for a lifelong journey of recovery.
For more information about Harmony Foundation, please visit:
www.harmonyfoundationinc.com
Ever caught yourself playing the dangerous game of comparison, especially on the rocky road of recovery and personal growth? You're not alone. This episode is a heartfelt confessional about our shared struggle with 'comparisonitis.' I open up about the pitfalls of measuring our individual healing against someone else's, revealing how this can hinder the very progress we seek. With anecdotes from my own life and the wisdom hard-earned through years of navigating sobriety, I offer up a candid exploration of why your unique journey is not just valid but vital.
We often overlook the strength that lies in our personal stories, and yet, they are the very threads that weave the rich tapestry of human experience. This episode is a celebration of that tapestry, an affirmation that by embracing and sharing our individual narratives, we spark joy and gratitude in ourselves and others. It's a reminder that our paths, no matter how divergent, have the power to inspire and support the community around us. So if you find yourself needing a lifeline or simply a dose of camaraderie, remember: assistance is always close at hand, and together, our mission is nothing short of building better humans—one story at a time.
For over 50 years, Harmony Foundation has worked as a nonprofit to serve those seeking recovery from substance addictions. Our residential and intensive outpatient programs are in a collaborative and respectful treatment environment with multiple specialty tracks offering additional support. Our main campus is nestled on a 43-acre campus in the Rocky Mountains just outside of Estes Park, Colorado, that promotes physical, emotional, and spiritual healing. With one of the most robust alumni programs in the county, clients remain connected and empowered for a lifelong journey of recovery.
For more information about Harmony Foundation, please visit:
www.harmonyfoundationinc.com
Hey, hey, welcome to season three, episode six of Monday State of Mind, brought to you by Harmony Foundation. My name is Michael Mausel and I am your host. Welcome, happy Monday or happy whatever day the week it is that you are listening to this. Just because it's Monday State of Mind doesn't mean that you have to listen to it on a Monday. You listen to this when it best suits you and your schedule and when you need to hear the message that I'm bringing. If this is your first time to Monday State of Mind, welcome. I am so grateful that you are here spending time with me listening to the goodness and to seasoned listeners. Welcome back. I am so glad that you are here. I love this family of Monday State of Mind because we are just crushing life every single week with new episodes, new things to think about, to get us wanting to look at how we can show up better every single day. So here we go. What is Michael going to bring to the table today? Well, this is a really good one, and this is something I've been thinking a lot about. But I've also had a lot of conversations with a lot of people that are early in recovery, and when I say early in recovery and I'm going to tell you this is not an episode just for people in recovery. You can take what I'm saying and you can apply it to literally almost anything in your life. It is not just about sobriety, I promise. So keep your earbuds in and keep listening.
Speaker 1:I've been talking to a lot of newer people in recovery under the year mark, some of them like in their first couple of years, and there seems to be, just for whatever reason right now, this comparisonitis, comparisonitis with sobriety and where people are at on their journey. People I've noticed, you get sober, you want to do the work, you want to be a better person, you want to have this, that and the other thing. And when you start looking at other people's journeys and I've had people say to me and I'm going to use other people's names because I'm not going to use real names but fake names but hey, michael Sally has three months in sobriety and she already has a new job and she has a new place to live and I'm still living with my parents. What am I doing wrong? Or Michael Jerry already found his higher power, had his spiritual experience, when I haven't had mine. Is there something wrong with me? Et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. Even things like like Michael. This only has a year and a half and she's already found the love of her life, and I'm not ready to date yet.
Speaker 1:What am I doing wrong? That is the theme that I've been hearing lately. This person has this. I don't. There must be something wrong with me. Ladies, gents, there's nothing wrong with you. Your journey is your journey. It is nobody else's. There's a reason why there is only one of you on this planet.
Speaker 1:Do not compare yourself to where other people are at, because let me tell you something and no, I have not been sober for, I don't even think, a long time. I've been sober for eight years, and I will tell you that I used to have that too, though I don't want to discount it, because I was there too. I used to, in early recovery. Compare my sobriety to other people. I'd be like damn. I have three years and this person has six months, and they are so much happier than me. What am I missing? What's the secret sauce? Why am I not feeling this? Or why is it that I have now four years and this person has a year? And they're already doing all these service positions? They have a brand new car, they have their life together and I'm just getting out of debt.
Speaker 1:I want you to be able to, instead of comparing yourself and I know that this can be hard, because I also am saying this episode for me, because I still I know it's hard to believe I still have moments of comparisonitis, having eight years in recovery. It's a journey for a reason. Recovery and, just like anything in life, ebbs and flows. Sometimes things are going well for me and they're not going well for others, and vice versa, and that's just part of life. What I have learned with this comparisonitis is that it's only causing more harm to me and my goals.
Speaker 1:With sobriety and how I want to show up, because, let me tell you, you cannot set expectations on yourself or how you're supposed to feel at a certain time in this journey. Don't do it. The only expectation I'm gonna say that you should maybe have is to stay sober. If there are days that all you do is stay sober, that is a win, because this disease wants us to dead every second of every day. So, comparisonitis, ask yourself what is this doing for you? If anything? It's giving you fear and anxiety and making you feel like less of a person and you don't need to feel that way when you are already being so brave and so courageous every day, tackling something that wants you dead. So if you are not where you think you should be, there is no, you should be here at this certain time. There is none of that. Wad up the case of the shoulds and the comparisonitis and throw it away, slam a trash can, lid on it and smile, because here's the thing we are human beings and we are rooted in fear, fear of not being accepted, fear that people are gonna judge us because we're not as far along. But hey, let me tell you something maybe where you are at on your journey of sobriety and your evolution is exactly where you need to be, for a reason you don't see right now. But be patient and trust the process, because I will tell you, and I can tell you this with so much certainty.
Speaker 1:Looking back, when I wanted to be in a different place in my sobriety, back around like year three, I was like I should have this, that and the other thing, like should, should, should, why not me, poor Michael, pity, pity, pity, pity Michael. When I look back now and I'm in a good space, I realize I was not ready for everything that I wanted. Then I had to grow through some serious moments and some serious behavior changes in order to be gifted what I so desperately wanted that I have today. So I say that to all of you that might have your days where you're like why am I not there? I should be here. No, you shouldn't. No, you shouldn't. You are exactly where you need to be and what is the gift you can find right here, right now, on your journey.
Speaker 1:What is the gift? Because there are so many gifts and, honestly, your story of how you're growing through sobriety can be the very story that somebody needs to hear that might be in similar shoes as you, where they can look at you and be like thank you so much for sharing that. It's something that I have to pay attention to almost every day, because when I show up to meetings and I hear people's shares or I meet with people or friends in recovery for coffee or hiking or cold plunging, all the stuff, and they tell me, oh, my God, this is really happening, I have to be mindful. Instead of being like, oh, why not me? I need to celebrate them. I want to offer this consideration for all of you.
Speaker 1:Instead of getting comparisonitis, why not switch your mindset and be like I am so happy for that person because that probably took a lot of work and I may not be there in my time's not there yet, but I know that if I keep going, things are going to turn out even better than I think I want them. There's the real kicker is that things are actually going to turn out way better than you could possibly imagine with your shoulds and where you think you want to be. And I can tell you that also with absolute certainty that I sold myself short in the beginning of my recovery with what I think I wanted, because what I have now is far beyond what I could have ever imagined, because I just let go of what I can and can't control and I just showed up and continue to do the work take my medicine AKA, go to meetings, meet with my sponsor, read the book, all the things that help Michael Mausel. Stay on the straight and narrow, but I get it. We are humans and we have those moments. I just want to bring to light that. Don't let it deter you from your journey.
Speaker 1:Don't let comparisonitis and should be a stalemate and be a barrier to your growth. Instead, have a perspective shift and celebrate the heck out of the people that are sharing these things, because sometimes it's uncomfortable to share when things are going good because we feel bad, because it might not be going good for other people. But damn, we got to share when things are going good and we also have to share when things are not going good. So, in moments of getting down and shooting on yourself, celebrate those humans and also celebrate yourself for recognizing that you are going into that place and choosing to course correct and being like nope, not today, satan, I'm not going to go down that route. I'm going to go down the route of having more gratitude and celebrating other people, because I want to be celebrated when I get to a place that I think that I should be celebrated.
Speaker 1:You guys like chest up. Come on, chest up, get excited about the fact that you are unique. Your journey is yours and yours alone, and let it be the most beautiful journey. And don't give up. Don't let comparisonitis and shooting on yourself take you down. People in your life need you, so continue to show up, continue to accept the things that you can change and the things that you can change, or your attitude and outlook around where you're at. And what you can't change is how other people are going about their journeys and just be like, hey, that's where they're at, I have no business shooting what I have, where my business lies and what I'm doing for me, and that is where we take our power back.
Speaker 1:The human mind can be insane, right, I'm telling you, there are days where I'm like, oh my God, all these people have all these things and I have nothing. And then I'm quickly reminded. I'm quickly reminded like, hot damn, michael, you're sober, you have the most precious gift. You're sober, wow, and you didn't cause harm today. Like, oh my God, sometimes I have to break it down to that simple to realize I am kicking butt, and I'm kicking butt because I'm sober and I'm not causing harm.
Speaker 1:So I hope you find some inspiration and some motivation to get out of beating yourself up for where you may or may not be on your sobriety journey. Don't beat yourself up. What I want to offer you is just keep showing up, keep being in action, keep doing the damn thing, and miracles will keep happening all the time. They will happen if you look for them and you don't set an expectation of how they should look. Just know that they're happening and they're working for you. You just have to be willing to see them.
Speaker 1:Damn, that's good. I'm like jazzed up just talking about that. It is such a gift to just be me and that nobody else is me and that I have my journey, and my journey is sacred, and I know that when I share my journey with other people, people are going to hear what they need to hear. That's going to help them on their journey. So what a gift that we all are separate and different to be able to help so many different people. Yes, go out there, have a great rest of your day doing whatever it is you're doing. Before we part ways, I want to remind you that help is available. If you or someone you know is in need of assistance, please reach out to Harmony Foundation at 970-586-4491. Just remember that together we build better humans. All right, you guys, I'll see you next week.