Trusting the Universe & Sh*t

Doing Deep work & meeting our shadows

• Stacey Lee & Ané De Hoop • Season 1 • Episode 18

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The majority of successful entrepreneurs do deep work frequently, if not daily.

Are you doing deep work? 

We also discuss chat GPT and whether or not you should be using it to create your offers and sales pages.

If you're interested in doing shadow work we highly recommend our good friends course "Mirror Mirror" - you can find her on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/glmgee/


You can find Ané and Stacey on Instagram at:

Stacey - @barefootbranding
✦ instagram.com/barefootbranding
🌐 barefootbranding.academy

Ané - @mgmnt__
✦ https://www.instagram.com/mgmnt__/
https://msha.ke/anemgmnt

Visit us here: 🌐 trustingtheuniverseandshit.com
Email us: 📩 hello@trustingtheuniverseandshit.com

Intro music by Tyler Dixon

Ane:

Cause it's Scorpio season. I've definitely diving in to more shadow work journaling and sitting with my little inner brat and my inner shadow queen, because she's been really present with me this week.

Stacey:

the bigger your dreams, the bigger the shadow it's gonna cast. So as soon as you stand up, it's going to cast a big shadow and a big dream, it's going to cast a big shadow

Ane:

Welcome to episode 18. How amazing.

Stacey:

Welcome, welcome. So today we wanted to talk a little bit about doing deep work. Doing deep work I think is something that we do very naturally but I don't know if we've really spoken about What is deep work and what it looks like specifically, and maybe some really practical examples of what deep work might look like when you're in business. Yeah, I

Ane:

think this is a, yeah, this is going to be a really good topic because like you said, I think we do that quite regularly deep work can also mean personal development. Just practicing a spiritual development or, particularly something that you want to address within yourself. But yeah, it, it does come with a benefit for business as well, obviously, because the more we work on ourselves and we understand ourselves, the more we can be of service. I'm really excited for us to give some practical ideas and insights of what we do for deep work and how we do it.

Stacey:

So I'll give the first example. So one of the examples that for me is. This morning when I got up, I sat there just on the couch in meditation and last night I'd written out all the things that I want to do, all the projects and every everything that was sitting in my brain and some people call this a brain dump, but for me, I never really completely understood that because I thought if I dumped out every single thing that was in my brain, I wasn't going to be here for 100 hours. So I just wrote down last night, Some of the major projects that were on my mind that I want to complete for personal and for business and I wrote them all down just so I could look at them. And then this morning when I woke up, I just sat there in meditation just for as long as it felt like and I went through my list in my head. And just sort of felt into each thing to see which one was bringing that little bit more excitement, little bit more passion, to see which one, because we're often trying to make that decision, okay, should I be going this way or this way, and I'm just trying to feel into which one of these topics is bringing me that little bit more. Excitement to want to go and do so I'm just trying to tune into that and see which one it is so that Because I have written down at least six months worth of things because I want to do all the things all the time I want to do all the things so for me I have to decide on which one is next because if I want to if I try and do them all I'll get all caught up in circles and I won't be able to, I won't be able to action them all because there's not enough time to do them all in one month.

Ane:

How did you end up, did you just write everything down and then did you get to a conclusion or it's kind of still up in, up in the air of like getting back in, yeah, figuring out what the next steps are?

Stacey:

Yeah. So it's, it's a feeling. It's. Okay, so I'll give you, I'll give you a concrete example. Okay. So I want to do I want to make a bunch of soap and I want to do this for Christmas and I want to buy all the cool stuff that goes in, like all the different clays and all the different scents and everything. And then, so I, I sat on that for a bit and I felt how that felt to make. And then I was thinking about, I want to make these digital calendars for. iPads as a project for something that I can sell and so I thought and felt into that and I was just feeling which one felt the most exciting for me, the most, it just had that little piece, that little tiny bit of excitement over the other thing. And this is something that I got from watching a lot of Bashar. channels. He's always talking about following that little thing that makes, is exciting for you over the other thing. So I'm just feeling which one? Cause I'm like, Oh, they all feel so good. I want to do them all. Okay. But which one do you want to do now? Is often the question that I need to ask myself.

Ane:

I love that. And it's so funny. The two that you have is like polar opposites. So they're both creation, but they're both opposite ends of the spectrum of what you want to do. But that's great. That's really cool. Being on that sort of decision making and that feeling for a bit until it's like a full body. Yes. To do one of one or the other. Yeah. Yeah. And

Stacey:

it's not even like I'm at a full body. Yes. With it yet. It's just, okay. I'm going to follow this for a little bit. I'm just gonna see where it goes. I'm just going to follow it a little bit until it becomes a full body. Yes. Because initially you may not get that it's not going to be. Yes. Screaming at you. So I'm only going to scream at you if you leave it for too long to the point where you've ignored it, ignored it, ignored it, and then it will become really loud. So initially, if it's a little tiny spark, it's not going to be really loud initially, or for me, it's not.

Ane:

I actually love that we brought this up because I've noticed as well within myself too, I get this real excitement of doing something new or have a new service or offering out. And then I'll either write it down or I'll voice note myself or whatever, this idea. And then I don't fully take that action yet either. I sit on it. I meditate on it. I really feel into it because I think we're so much. Noise and content out there, we can get influenced really quickly and then we can go into a decision and then it ends up really not being soul aligned. And so I, cause I used to make the mistake of actioning it. And then, we said about the messy action, actioning it and then. Noticing three months later, the attraction of what we wanted from it is actually not in alignment because I made that mistake again. I know now, okay, let me sit with it. Let me really fill into it. And if it's still a hell yes, the next week or two then I'll start putting really implement action onto it. So that's really cool. I agree. I do the same thing where I really, how human design mentors, what do they always say? Is it a, is it a sacral yes or something along those lines? And I think it's a similar thing. It's is it an actual full body? Yes. Cause it's Scorpio season. I've definitely diving in to more shadow work journaling and sitting with my little inner brat and my inner shadow queen, because yeah, she's been really present with me this week. And instead of Numbing her or just not listening to her or avoiding her. I've just been okay, you want to have a 10 minute of, having a bit of a tantrum. Let's do that. So I've done a lot of this week has been a lot of embodiment, emotional release for me. And. I think it's really serving for my business too, because if I just kept working or I kept not listening to her, it would have come out in business and in my clients and I may have been passive aggressive, that kind of, it would have manifested in different ways. So. The deep work for me this week has been all about shadow work and journaling with her and sitting with my shadow. So yeah, I like

Stacey:

how you say her. I feel like that there is a demarcation line there that separates you from the eye in some way that helps you to look at yourself as if you're treating yourself and you're helping yourself. If you just make that little switch in your language, I like how you've done that. I'm going to sit with her this week. As opposed to saying, I'm going to sit with myself this week. I feel like there's a nice little separation there. We can have a little perspective shift on how it is we're tuning in and how it is we're tapping in. And I also agree with what you're saying. Maybe we don't need to jump fully in, feet first, into the little whispers that we hear. I follow the whispers because they are just giving us these little... Inklings and we don't always need to action them immediately right away with all of our body and if it's I saw this quote actually and I and I yesterday and I was thinking about it thinking about it and then I decided no actually I don't agree with it and it was something like let me just find it it was something tell if it's not a yes if it if you're undecided it's a no and I thought oh I thought hmm I don't know about that. I don't know about that because that's, that's saying to us, well, we we're not allowed to be unsure about something. Yes. For if we're there. Yeah. Sitting in, in under, in decision for a really long time maybe, but not if it's just us sitting with something to sit in deep work to sit in that space and say, Hmm, yeah, let's consider this and not just rush through. Because it's sometimes, there's a lot of resistance that comes up. I remember when I was doing a bit of deep work for my launch and I was writing all the emails and I had to do, I had to do a lot of deep work to write those emails, to get to a place where I was really tapping very deeply into the psychology of people and it was really difficult and I spent a day With my partner doing this, but oh, the resistance that came up for me. Oh, it was so difficult, but I think it's so important to do that kind of work and not just do the surface level things that I have a really good example for this. Actually. It's when we look at other people, we think they're successful. I'm just going to do what they're doing. I'm just going to post the way they're posting. I'm going to make the videos they make. I'm going to copy their colors. I'm going to copy their fonts. I'm going to copy everything that they do. And I'm just going to do that. This is what I'm, this is what I'm saying. If you are copying someone in that way, you're not doing deep work because you're not following the way that you need to, to show up or the way that you want to show up.

Ane:

Yeah, a hundred percent. Actually, well, you're not being authentic to yourself when you're just copying someone else's way of doing it. obviously it worked for them because it's authentic to them, but, and you can get inspired by what they did. And I think that's where it can get a little bit lost is like, we get inspired and we're I have to do exactly that. But maybe it was actually just a glimpse of half of the things that they were doing that was inspiring. And you take and maybe use in your way to implement it. But fully I 100 percent agree. You're not actually be authentic to the way that you want to show up in the world. And I think that's where the key is for deep work to be. To be done, because how are you going to know if you're being authentic, if you're not, and you use that actually for a bit when you're talking, sitting with it, literally sitting with it, laying, sitting, whatever. But I think so many times we logically think, Oh, that you're being lazy or that's lazy. No, actually that's, that's where, that's where the magic is lied and laid. And we don't, we don't notice it until. Maybe, yeah, a couple hours later or a few days later where something comes through for you but sitting with it and yeah, contemplating and reflecting and I love that is the, you can, you can buy a templated email sequence from someone, but it's just not going to land the same because. You didn't sit with what the resistance is for you, what, what's coming up for you. And, we know this, that a lot of our clients are somewhat of a reflection of our own resistance and fears and doubts. And so you can copy someone's template, but it's just not going to land. And it's just not, you're not going to get that beautiful connection with your clients or your audience that you want. So. Yeah. I, I love that we're talking about deep work because there is so much potency to this and, and I think it's not talked about enough actually.

Stacey:

There. Yeah. And another question that I have, I don't know if this is a question for the universe or for you or for me, I don't know, but how do you tell the difference between the resistance that you feel as a no or the resistance because it's very hard? Do what I mean? I don't know. If you're feeling a lot of resistance, you think, oh, maybe I shouldn't be doing it, but often the resistance is, this is very difficult, and I'm going to shy away from it, so sometimes we do need to go into the resistance, dive right into the resistance, and sometimes, maybe it's, maybe it's that resistance is what we need to dive into, and then when we're feeling a no for something, we're feeling Maybe what it is, is if it appears to us in our minds, if something appears to us, an idea, appears to you in your mind, I feel very much like it's meant for you. I feel if it pops in there, it's there for a reason. And the things that are a no could be coming from external sources maybe, maybe it's someone saying, can you do this for me? And then you say yes to that, but it didn't come from you internally. So a lot of clients will say this, I remember once a client said to me, Oh, you should have a service where you just, you're a Photoshop person and you're on call. So if anyone ever needs you to do something quickly in Photoshop, you're on call and you can do that for us. And I immediately was hell, are you serious? I was hell no, definitely not.

Ane:

I love that. It's, you seem very passionate. Maybe you should do that because that's a hell no. My nervous system. That's so funny.

Stacey:

Maybe that's it. I don't know exactly.

Ane:

I fully agree with you on even that quote that you mentioned before about if it's a, maybe it's probably a no, That's where you gotta kind of question yourself. Yeah. Okay. What's the actual resistance here? And is it a place from fear? Or is it a place from truly, your body feeling no to that? And that's why it's so important to give yourself that space to contemplate and sit with and, and figure out why this is coming up because yeah. Yeah, I don't agree that if it's a maybe it's a no, because you're always going to have to consider many different things, whether that's an investment you're making, whether that's a move, whatever. So it's, it's quite important to Yeah, to really sit with that before you make a decision and it doesn't mean it's a no, it just means that okay, there's things coming up here and let me look into it because this is actually an opportunity to grow and to evolve and to maybe take that leap or maybe honor my boundaries it depends on what it is. So Yeah,

Stacey:

and I had this happen to me once when my partner and I were going through some changes and I remember an old friend said to me something Just gotta pack up the house and you gotta, you gotta clear it out and you just separate everything and just move and... And I was like, Hmm, not really at that point yet. I was just airing out some ideas and some different things I was moving through. And immediately she was saying, Okay, you've got to move out. I was Well, no, it wasn't really at that point. It was, I was sitting in this maybe space. So it wasn't immediately a no. And then you can go either way. Sometimes you can really go towards a yes, maybe a no,

Ane:

it's actually funny the, and she probably didn't, wasn't aware of it, but sometimes we do project we project even that other person that said, Oh, you should have this on call photo shoot thing. That is an idea, but maybe it's not the idea. That's for me. And I think that's, again, why it's really. Important to do deep work because when you're on a, okay, this is in alignment with me on this isn't when people do project their thoughts and ideas and perceptions, which is going to be inevitable because that's just how we are as human beings to connect. Then the deep work comes in handy because you can journal it out, you can breathe it out, you can, sit with it and it does. It does make you more of a sovereign being when you're doing the deep work.

Stacey:

I think you're so right in that a lot of people are projecting. They just project whatever they would do in that situation. But you really have to assess yourself. Because we can't just follow, Okay, well they, they have more experience than me, or I respect their opinion, I'll just do whatever they're saying to do. We can't live that way. We really have to trust ourself and, especially in business, you have to have so much faith in yourself to get through all the highs and lows of everything. So, I think cultivating that trust in yourself and cultivating this, The space within us that, that allows ourselves to go really deep on decisions and deep on the work that we want to put out in the world. I think that that's when we're going to create our best work.

Ane:

Absolutely. Absolutely. And I think that's where authenticity lies, and people can feel that. And that's why people want to then work with those people, businesses, because it's authentic. It's not just a copycat copycat, business model, essentially. Yeah. Yeah.

Stacey:

It's not going to be fulfilling either to have that, to have you learn off somebody who's just copied a framework from somebody else who's just thought that's going to make them successful. And I'm seeing this a lot now, especially with ChatGPT, use ChatGPT to write your sales page. And it makes me so sick to my stomach when clients say, look, I wrote the sales page with ChatGPT. And I'm like, Oh no. Unless you have a very, very, very good inputs for AI, don't, don't do that. Please don't do that. Please just write from your heart. Chat AI really requires you to put really good inputs in. So you need to do some deep work to get those inputs. A lot of people just do stuff like they'll just type in. Okay. Tell me what my audience pain points are. Without putting in the proper inputs of your, your brand, your tone of voice, your specific niche, your specific, without putting in those proper inputs, you're going to get very, very generic output. And you're going to ask yourself, why, why isn't this working? And I can tell now when AI stuff comes to me from clients, because I'm seeing it so much now. AI stuff is coming to me, a client is saying, okay, here is the brief. And it's been written by AI. And I'm like, where are you in this? where is your identity? Where is your vision in this? I'm not creating a vision and a brand based off AI. I'm just not doing that. There's

Ane:

no you in it. Based off a robot. Yeah.

Stacey:

Yeah, and I've, I've, I've, I've had it happen at least three times already. A client being like, here, here, here's all the stuff. Wow. I'm no, nah, because I just put it in one of those, a detect AI things and it'll say 98% generated by ai. But I can just tell now. I can just tell. I can just see. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Of course. Of course you can. That's little side. That's a little side note.

Ane:

Yeah. No, but it's, this is, it's a good, reminder of doing the damn deep work. Because, because Obviously, if you can't sit with yourself and really, have a, yeah, assess yourself and really have a, deep conversation and be really honest and, reflect on things that you'd like and dislike and all the things, then how are you going to be able to serve the world the way that it's going to be beneficial for the collective, truly, because if you were doing work that you don't even really know if it's gonna hit the mark on things or the pain points or whatever, then you might as well just not do it. Because it's just, you're wasting everyone's time. You really are. And this isn't to shit on you, but it's just kind of giving a really loving, hardcore reminder that you gotta, you gotta do the deep work. You gotta do the shadow work. You gotta journal. You really have to, or whatever your thing is, breath work, whatever, meditation, chanting. Oh my gosh. Like anything to shake the energy, move the energy out of you. We are. Like constantly influenced by things and you have to work on your energetic hygiene in order to know how to authentically serve the world like

Stacey:

energetic hygiene. Oh, I love that. That is a hint. I feel like you need to create that product. I'm just saying. Yeah, you need to do this deep work. You have to do it. You can't just plug some crap into chat GPT and have that create your offerings. It is so offensive to me because it's just, yeah, you, you can use it for certain things, but don't, don't just create your entire product in your sales page based on chat GPT. Just don't do it. Okay. Oh, no. Yeah. A little bit of tough love. 100%.

Ane:

But just to go on the topic of the offense thing that you said, but it's offensive to everyone. Truly. It's not just for people like us who can see it. And, we strategize a lot of not a lot, but we strategize for clients. And a lot of the time it is looking at the. Deeper, rooting cause of your life and who you are as a person and things. It's not actually the strategy itself. That's only a part of it. But a lot of it is more like your personality, your brand, who you are, And so if you give us chat GPT stuff, it's just, it's not going to benefit anyone.

Stacey:

Well, I just feel like it's not respecting my time because you haven't put in the work to. Look at all the customers, all the research, you haven't done the research, you haven't done the work that I need to extract what I need, you're just, I don't know, I don't know, you're just phoning it in, basically, you're phoning it in and you just think, okay, well, I can be successful if I just plug a bunch of crap into AI, but you need to have it. A bit of you in there. Where is the you in there if you, if you're not doing that? No, no, but I, I hear you.

Ane:

I agree. I agree. And just as we're speaking about this and constantly speaking about it, where I just think that it's, it's you trying to take the short road to success, essentially. And there's no such thing as. Overnight success. We, we know all this, it's just, it looks it has, but those people, we can guarantee you was been doing the deep work for decades upon decades, and that's the thing that's going to create evolution into your business, into who you are, into your relationships, everything, it's such a beautiful yeah, cycle and way to be human, to do the deep work to know, okay, this is. Not negotiables. This is how I like to be. This is sticky, whatever. Just start incorporating deep work daily into your life because it will be of benefit.

Stacey:

Yes. Perfect. I'll also, if you are interested in doing shadow work, I know our friend, G has her shadow container shadow work container coming up soon called Mirror Mirror. So I would do that if you're thinking about it. Yeah, where do I start? I would just go there and go check out. I'll put her link in the show notes if you wanna go check that out, because you're right. Like just, just do some shadow work. Start there and then try and understand who you are really at a deep level. Because I was watching this video yesterday and he, he was saying the bigger your dreams, the bigger the shadow it's gonna cast So as soon as you stand up, it's going to cast a big shadow and a big dream, it's going to cast a big shadow and you need to deal with those shadows in order for you to have those big dreams. That is

Ane:

such a beautiful analogy and it's so simple and yet so of course, like it makes so much sense. And I'm actually so glad that you brought up mirror, mirror G's container. Cause I actually did it last year and it was, it's amazing. And I still, to this day, use the, the material, the tools every day. I said this week I've been in my shadow work. Cause, cause I knew she was promoting it and I was like, Oh my gosh. And I have little documents of everything and all the activities isn't just like journal prompts. It's actually really cool activities that you can do daily or weekly to just incorporate, just, just be friends with your shadows. I think you hear the word shadow work and you think. Oh my God. I'm everything's going to come up. I'm, this, this deep, dark fears and doubts, but it's really not that deep, but it is. So yeah, but it is. It's not that it's not that deep, dark and scary. It is definitely deep, but yeah,

Stacey:

I know what you mean. It does seem scary. And we do shy away from those shadows because we don't want to look, we don't want to see what's under the hood. We're like, no, no, no, no, no. Don't look under there. I don't want to know what's under there. Once we are able to make friends, then we make friends with the whole of ourselves. We're not denying any parts of ourselves. Hmm.

Ane:

Beautiful. Beautifully said. Yeah. And to be fair, your shadows come out all the time. So you may as well be aware of them and then be friends with it and then not be aware of them and then sabotage everything in your life. So you can choose.

Stacey:

Okay. Well, we'll wrap up the episode there. Thank you again so much for listening. If you enjoyed this show, please leave us a review. We would love to hear your voice and see what you have to say. And yeah, we would just love to interact with you. So if you want to send us a message on Instagram, you can yeah.

Ane:

Amazing. Thanks for listening guys. Thanks guys and speak next time.. Bye!