How do you manage your expectations and keep the faith?

One of the biggest lessons when you go into business for yourself, is learning to have total faith in yourself no matter how hard or how bad things get. And that's what this podcast is really about, trusting in the universe, trusting yourself and following the nudges.

Managing your expectations can be tough when you're a one-woman show. What happens when you launch and no one buys? This is a really common question. 

You can find Ané and Stacey on Instagram at:
Ané - @ane.mgmnt
✦ https://www.instagram.com/mgmnt__/
https://msha.ke/anemgmnt

Stacey - @barefootbranding
✦ instagram.com/barefootbranding
🌐 barefootbranding.academy
https://barefootbranding.academy/eyes-above-waitlist/

Visit us here: 🌐 trustingtheuniverseandshit.com
Email us: 📩 hello@trustingtheuniverseandshit.com

Intro music by Tyler Dixon from @tones.on.toast - tonesontoast.com

Transcript

Ane: 0:00

I love that you brought up the, you know, keeping to the faith because well, this is what the whole podcast is about is trusting the universe, fully trusting, fully having faith.

Stacey: 0:11

The meal arrives, you eat the meal. It's tasty. You feel satisfied. It's not like junk food where you look forward to it, you eat it, but you feel sick immediately. So when you really are working towards something that is really going to fulfill you, you will feel satiated

Ane: 0:50

hello everyone and welcome back to episode 21. Today we, we want to talk about managing expectations a little bit and how to navigate that and how we've navigated it in business and in life.

Stacey: 1:08

Managing expectations can be really difficult when you're working for yourself and you have all of these pieces that you have to put in place on your own. You don't have a boss. You don't have someone to look up to you to say, Do this, do that. These are your KPIs easier. If the, these are the milestones that you need to hit, you need to do that for yourself. And that's how you're going to know whether or not. Those goals are being met for yourself. And so when you do that for yourself, it's so different because you're inventing it all on your own. So when we do this on our own, it's, it's a lot, it can be very difficult. And so managing the expectations of that.

Ane: 1:48

Yeah, especially when you're so like on a timeline, like a lot of us, we do a lot of like projects, so it's like you're kind of on a timeline and it's like, oh, are we going to hit that expectation by that timeline? And I think the one thing that's really helped me is just being full transparent about the process and the expectations are coming on and also asking clients, like, what are you expecting? What are your standards towards X, Y and Z? Just to like, break the ice, like I think when you can just be full transparent and be vulnerable and open and just have a discussion it helps a lot because You realize we're all just human, we're all just trying to like, get to that goal, like you say and so Yeah, it doesn't put so much pressure on both ends post, like, I know that's helped me a lot. And you know, if there is, like, coming to an end of a project, I've had this happen where it's coming into a project and I'm like, gosh, that really didn't, that really didn't get to that expectation. And just being full transparent and honest, but hey, you know, this didn't work out this way. Let's, and then you shift the, the project has helped. Me manage my and also not put so much criticism and judgment towards me as well because we all are just trying the best that we can and especially if you have put a lot of effort into something and you get tech difficulties or people aren't getting or you have to wait for other people to get back to you about certain things like just those like things when you can just be super open and have a conversation open conversation about it. Yeah, it helps manage those, those expectations from my end anyways.

Stacey: 3:31

it can bring up a lot of emotions too, and it can bring up a lot of feelings about whether or not you feel like you've done enough. I know this enoughness can come up a lot. Like have I done enough? And then sometimes not feeling like you have done. Quote, unquote enough.

Ane: 3:47

I agree. And yeah. And I think that's why having. Transparency with your clients and with And so And so it's just making sure that, even if that expectation wasn't met, you are still quite open and had open discussion with your clients or with whoever you're working with or even yourself, like, okay. This didn't go to plan. However, I did try x, y, and z, and you remind yourself that that enoughness is actually enough because things happen in life, you know, there's tech difficulties, there's people that you're waiting for to reply to get back to you, there's life that happens, you know, and yeah, I think transparency is one of the ways to, Bring a bit of groundedness into expectations because if you have always had that open dialogue and open communication with yourself and the people around you, then you have more patience to get to your expectations that you want to met, you know, meet.

Stacey: 4:44

Yeah. Yeah, definitely having that. Clarity around a situation in the form of transparency, I think would be very helpful. But then how do you do that when you're working on your own, your just a sole. Person, you don't really have a team. You might not even have clients. You might just be working on a project and putting it out there and seeing what's going to happen. When we try to manage those expectations and we only have ourself as the. The person that we have to live up to that's when we can feel like, oh, how have I really hit? My goals, have I really gotten enough out of my potential? Have I. Have I gotten to that point where I really feel. Like I'm. Successful in myself. And so one of the things that I do to, to get to that point is I will. Each day. So if I break it down into a day and then maybe a longer time period, like a few months and then a year. So in one day, I'll say to myself, if I get this, this and this done. So usually three things. If I get this done, then I'm happy with my progress. In three months. If I get this launched on and I get this other project done, I'm happy with my progress. And so on for a year, maybe I didn't really go too much further out for a year because I feel like we changed so much. Going beyond a year. I know some people say, you know, how, where do you want to be in 10 years? That to me is, is like, okay, well I could have a very vague picture, but I know it's going to change as time. Like I feel different every day. So I know that in 10 years, my vision might've changed very significantly. Yeah. That's one of the things that I'll do to make sure that I just feel that. I'm happy with my progress and then I'm happy with. What I'm done without feeling. This huge dip of, oh my God, have I done

Ane: 6:38

this huge, like, pressure that we put on ourselves because I also think that that's where we end up not, that's when we kind of fold and that's when we like the overwhelm this can come through and then we actually do procrastinate because we actually, our nervous system is fully wired up and it isn't grounded in taking those actionable steps. So I love, I love that you spoke about those kind of non negotiables that you kind of set yourself, whether that's monthly or. Three monthly or, you know, a year. And I agree. I don't tend to go further than a year either. Because yeah, things change all the time and we want to, we also want to be open to receiving beautiful. New opportunities and things that come in anyways, you know so if you plan too much, then you're not, yeah, you're not in that receivership as well. And I wanted to also add with those non negotiables that I also love putting intentionality to anything, like very being intentional to why you want to, you know do X, have, have or do X, Y, and Z. Because I think, again, if we. If we take the pressure off getting those goals and, and putting intentionality to how you want to feel or how you want to yeah, be as a person again, it, it's just, it just helps. I actually think that's how manifestation gets so much quicker in your world because you're actually already being that person that you want to be when you have that X, Y, and Z, you know and also you're just, you're just evolving naturally. You're just, yeah. Yeah. Evolving more effortlessly that way without putting so much pressure on. So that's been one of my main things I've been trying to stick to this year is intentionality and, and being like, okay, am I wanting, you know, these three projects because I want to look a certain way or because I actually just want to feel like I'm collaborating and building community and, you know, have loving people around me. Like what's the intention behind it. And yeah. And I think that's what actually one of our friends, G has been really well at You know, reminding me of that because yeah, I, you know, we're energetic people so like having intention about anything is just such a beautiful way to live life, you know.

Stacey: 8:50

And I think what you said as well, intention is everything. On the last episode. And I've been thinking about that. Because it's so true that intention is everything for us, because if we know. Why we going into a certain thing? Not for the. The accolades, the validation, the likes, the follows. If we go into a project. With real intentionality about how we want to be. Like you said, how we want to feel the kind of community we want to have the kind of people we want to surround ourselves with. So the other piece of this for me is fulfillment. So are you really feeling fulfilled with what you're doing? Because if you aren't feeling fulfilled, it's probably because the vision that you have or the things that you're working towards. aren't really, truly the things that you really want. Those are the things that maybe you've been told you want, but maybe they're not yours. Maybe there's something that society has placed upon you to say, these are the things you want. You want lots of followers. You want lots of accolades. You want your parents to be proud of you. You want. To feel and see yourself as being successful. But I don't think success actually looks online to what. Actually the work that it takes to and requires you to get there. Because it takes a lot of grit and a lot of tenacity to get there. And I think the visions that we, the visuals, the photos that we see online of people living the successful lives. I don't really. Match what really exists in the reality of what it's going to be for you to have a successful. Business and life like it's very fake and we all know that we all know how fake it is, but I've seen what can happen when, what people post versus what their real lives are like.

Ane: 10:40

Very so. Yeah. And I think as a collective, as we're, you know, evolving into a higher frequency and, and, you know, dimension, it's like, we can see that now. Like, it's very, I think for so long, especially when social media came out, we were very influenced and we still are, and we will always be because that is kind of a tribal nature to be influenced by each other. But you can easily see when people aren't actually in alignment with what they want, you know, like they're just putting a show on and, and, it's yeah, I actually have a lot of compassion for those type of people now, because it's just, again, it's, it's shadow work. Like if you're not aware of it, it's going to rule your life and it's gonna, it's gonna Yeah, it's just going to be this crash and burn and you might have like a dark night of the soul moment or something, you know or, or not. And they, and they live like that forever. Who knows, but I agree. Fulfillment is probably the antidote to kind of, I guess, fulfillment and intentionality and, you know, having, you know, sticking to your non negotiables, those little goals I feel like then expectations kind of dissipate a little bit like, cause you're so focused on those three kind of core areas, you realize that like the intent, the expectation was probably just this like a little bit of an egoic moment. And then you're like, Oh, actually I'm, I'm on the right path regardless. It's not even a big deal. Like I know that's, and also this is why I like transparency such a, it's such a cool thing to have with yourself, not just. You know, with people, but being super honest with yourself, be like, okay, but why did I put this huge expectation and pressure on myself? And you're like, Oh, it's just because I wanted X, Y, and Z. And I'm actually in such an aligned, an aligned state or in a fulfilled state anyways, that, or I'm, or I'm getting to my non negotiables anyways, that it's not a big deal. So yeah, I'm glad that we, yeah, we're speaking about those three core elements because. Yeah, I think it's very natural and normal for us to have expectations and we need to have it obviously because we have standards in life, but it's just checking it and making sure that yeah, it's coming from a place that's a fulfilled place, you know, in a soul aligned place and not just egoic a little bit.

Stacey: 12:50

And fulfillment is really the ultimate goal. I think that's the ultimate goal to feel the feelings that you want to feel you want to feel. Ah, just that feeling of. I'm it's like when you eat a really delicious meal and you you've looked forward to it. If the meal arrives one day you eat the meal. It's tasty. You feel satisfied. It's not like junk food where you sort of, you look forward to it, but then the day comes, you eat it, but you feel sick immediately. It's like the difference between those two things. So when you really are working towards something that is really going to fulfill you, you will feel satiated and you feel happy no matter what the outcome's going to be. So. One of the biggest fears that people have that a lot of my clients say is what if nobody buys that's the most common one people say to me, And I'll just say quickly that if nobody buys, there's always going to be something that you can gather. There's always going to be. Something that you can utilize and nothing is ever wasted. So that's an ethos that you can bring with you all. Always nothing is ever wasted. So just know that you did your work and that if you just keep doing it, Don't throw the baby out with the bath water and just continue on your path and continue going. And continue putting in those steps. Going towards what it is you want to move towards following your passions towards those things. Regardless of the outcome.

Ane: 14:17

that's actually a really good analogy about the food thing because probably nine times out of ten when you know you're gonna go to a really delicious soul, like a delicious place that has like really nourishing food, you have a semi expectation that it's gonna be delicious but then you kind of also have this open ended like receivership of like let's see how it goes but with like fast food places your expectations are already as low as it can go and you know that this is probably not going to like fully fill you up anyways because it's you know processed food anyways so it's just funny to like reflect on when you have an expectation Just be open regardless of the of how that's going to be in fruition, in fruition, because I think it's normal for us to have the expectation, but and even with you saying about like, you know, clients that are like, oh, well, no one's going to buy, like they've kind of already put themselves in this position of like, no one is going to buy, but like you said, there's always something to be learned. So when you have that openness of like, yeah, but you're going to get data from it, or you're going to be able to learn how to, you know, you know. next time. It's just I feel like you're, again, the expectation taught you something but it isn't the be all end all sort of result, you know?

Stacey: 15:36

And the world isn't going to come crashing around, down around you. When that happens. It's. Okay. Cool. All right. That happened. Now what. And then sometimes you can, sometimes you can go into a big crash, like, oh no, I didn't, I didn't hit my goal that I, I, I hit a goal. I set a goal for. I wanted to add a hundred thousand dollars this year and I didn't do it. I've failed. No, no, no, no, no. You haven't failed. You've. Continually working towards. This thing, whether it takes you one year, whether it takes you five years and it may take you longer than you think it will, but you'd need to have the faith. You need to hold the faith in yourself. And I'd say that's probably the most key thing that you need. If you're in business for yourself is to hold the faith and have belief in yourself when nobody else will believe in you. You need to hold the faith. I continue holding the faith for yourself because it's going to get hard. Sometimes it's going to get really hot and you have to believe in yourself to say, no, I'm going to keep going. And I'm going to get. I'm going to get there eventually, and then you will show them, you will show them eventually if you just

Ane: 16:46

Yeah, absolutely. I... I love that you brought up the, you know, keeping to the faith because well, this is what the whole podcast is about is trusting the universe, fully trusting, fully having faith. And I think a lot of people in business, especially women, which is really funny. They tend to be so strategic, strategic that they forget about the energetic and the faithful part of business. And that's actually as women, our superpower, like that's where we actually are magnetic. And so if you can combine the two, it's just, you're going to get to where you want to get to. Yeah. Whether that's in one year or five years or 30 years doesn't matter, but you will eventually get to that destination. If that's what you desire, but yeah, I love that you brought up the faith thing because. It, yeah, it's such an important asset and element in having a business and keeping it.

Stacey: 17:40

It is. It is because it's the Yolo you're in the 1%. Your not in the standard. Run of the mill job. You're not doing, you're not following the rules that somebody else set out for you. You're making your own rules. You're creating your own projects. You're doing business your way, which we say in every intro. You're doing business your way, because that's the way you want things to be. You want to live a life. That's yours. It's completely unique to the way you want to do it. And not that somebody else has set out for you. And it can be hard to carve your own path. It's like walking in to the forest where nobody has walked before. There's going to be a lot of bushes to cut out of the way. There's going to be a lot of branches that you're going to have to get your machete out. And you're going to have to cut those down. Rather than the pocket heaps of tourists walk up and down and it's very well. Trodden in, but you don't want to go that way. You've decided to go on this path, but this path is the path less

Ane: 18:38

of looking at it. And again, that comes back to managing expectations. There's going to be times when your expectations are really high, and that's okay. Just keep the faith and also know that it's also okay to pivot. You know, have your expectations a little bit lower. It kind of keeps you humble too because if you're doing business your way, it's not always going to go your way and that's okay. Like that's when you have to kind of hold on to that faith and that trust and just lovingly, you know, check yourself and make sure that it's always coming from an intentional place. So yeah.

Stacey: 19:10

Yeah, and I think there's a difference between an expectation and a goal. So I think we can hold a goal without the expectation of what's going to look like when you get there. So I feel very much like a goal. It's very healthy to have for us to say, these are the things that I want. These are the things I'm moving towards. But without knowing exactly how it's going to look and exactly how it's going to pan out for us. So the expectation part of that is. It may look different to how I think it's going to look. But I'm going to release that expectation. The attachment that I have to

Ane: 19:44

Yeah, absolutely. I agree more. I, I love goals personally as well, and I think it's really important to have them for your evolution, for your growth, but yeah, just decipher the, the expectation was that too. Again, if you have goals to get to that next level, but your expectations is too high, it's, you're gonna be crashing and you're also gonna, possibly, your shadows are gonna come out even more because it doesn't wanna, you know, lean into that because it's scary, it's new. So yeah, I, I agree. Goals and expectations are definitely two different worlds. Mm-Hmm

Stacey: 20:19

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's different. It's like, you know, am I creating a vision board and sputum awful and we're putting out images and we cut them out and we put them on there. And we allow the universe to surprise and delight us to see. See how those things are going to pan out, because if we have very rigid expectations of how we want things to look. Then we're not allowing the universe to surprise and delight us. We're not really allowing those spaces in the music. Two.

Ane: 20:49

mm.

Stacey: 20:49

Give us, maybe something we hadn't imagined. Because we can't predict everything that's going to happen. We can't predict. Every which way that we want our lives to look exactly. There's no. Magic and music

Ane: 21:02

yeah. I love that. Surprise and delight us. Like, that's such a, that's such a mantra, you know? So, next time that you're little bit, like, stagnant or, like, stuck, just ask the universe to surprise and delight you and your answers will be answered. Your prayers? Prayers will be answered, not your answers.

Stacey: 21:22

Praise. Yeah. Yeah.

Ane: 21:24

Yes. have a lot of, we, we gotta create a list. We've got so many, we just need to listen back to these because I feel like in every episode we're like Add to the merge. Add to the merge

Stacey: 21:34

Yeah, add to the match. You know, we've put it on a cup and a mug and you can buy it. And on the mug, you can read it every morning. I be like, let the universe surprise and delight you as a reminder, because we made these constant reminders. It's not as if. We just forget, we could totally forget. You know, and so having those reminders, I think we'll be, we'll be even

Ane: 21:52

Yeah, course.

Stacey: 21:53

like, I'm just going to buy everything.

Ane: 21:55

obviously,

Stacey: 21:56

For myself, but, uh,

Ane: 21:58

Yes,

Stacey: 21:59

I really want the slip is. I want to get this the fluffy slippers.

Ane: 22:03

Will be a project

Stacey: 22:05

It's happening. Yeah. So can you keep your eyes peeled for that, which is prepping you now to get,

Ane: 22:10

Hundred percent. Yeah. Cool.

Stacey: 22:13

Okay. Well, I think, yeah, let's wrap the episode up there. Thank you so much for listening. If you want to leave us a review, we would love to hear. What you thought of the episode or any other insights also on Spotify now that you can actually leave? There are questions that we've put on every episode, so you can actually go onto Spotify now and you can type in responses to each episode and

Ane: 22:35

your answers and have a chat with you guys over it. And yeah, thank you so much for listening and. As always, let us know what landed for us, what's stuck, and if you're on a similar journey with dealing with expectations, especially around this time of the year, you know, there's always a lot of family and friends and celebration and expectations that can come up. It's not just business. But yeah, so thank you for listening and yeah, catch you guys on the next one. Bye.