Honor the season you're in with special guest Jade Wyllie

Meet today's guest Jade Wyllie as we talk about honoring the season you're in and letting out little bits of steam to reduce the pressure and live more fully in pleasure. 

We talk about disassociating, robbing ourselves, finding our essence shifting our mindset back into gratitude. Far too much to cover in two sentences so I guess you'll just have to listen to the episode!

Jade is a Womb hara therapist and she hosts women's circles to help you regulate your nervous system and build back the connection with your body and come back to your centre. 

You can find her here on IG: https://www.instagram.com/themysticmu
Or on her website: themysticmu.com/

You can find Ané and Stacey on Instagram at:
Ané - @ane.mgmnt
✦ https://www.instagram.com/mgmnt__/
https://msha.ke/anemgmnt

Stacey - @barefootbranding
✦ instagram.com/barefootbranding
🌐 barefootbranding.academy
https://barefootbranding.academy/eyes-above-waitlist/

Visit us here: 🌐 trustingtheuniverseandshit.com
Email us: 📩 hello@trustingtheuniverseandshit.com

Intro music by Tyler Dixon from @tones.on.toast - tonesontoast.com

Transcript

Stacey: 0:00

I got chills when you were saying, where have we robbed ourselves? And I just, I think I just felt like a lifetime of. Like robbing myself, flash before my eyes

Jade: 0:10

my whole life feeling mostly dissociated and then only in the last five or so years, like slowly, like opening up that, letting a little bit of steam out of time. And it's like, oh, then it grows your capacity to be able to hold what's happening.

Stacey: 0:47

wElcome everybody to episode 27, I believe we're at, I have a beautiful guest here today. I'm very excited that we have dragged you on today. So we have Jade and we're going to leave it a little mysterious today as to her parts of genius that we're going to dive into today. So welcome Jade and thank you so much for being here.

Jade: 1:16

Hello. Thank you so much for having me. I don't know about dragged. I feel like, yeah, we sort of whipped it up last minute, but it's nice to be here with you. Yeah. On a whim, didn't we? I was like, hey. On a whim. On the phone. Yeah. I love when it seems like that though. That feels spontaneous and light and fun and let's just do it and we don't have to plan it and we can just jump on and have a chat with some friends and I feel like business should be like that in a lot of senses and not feel like a big push and a big stretch and a, and a tough kind of thing. grind all the time. I don't want business to feel like that. Yeah. And I feel like we've been talking about the, like your podcast and doing a podcast for so long. So, so long. So finally, yeah, finally the moment is here.

Stacey: 2:15

The moment is here. It feels easy for me to talk and to let things come to light as they just naturally would and me and you. So for context. For people listening, Jade and I have been working together for a little while and those kinds of relationships develop and they, they grow and they get, get texture and they really add to the ways that you can work with somebody. So very different from if I were to have somebody on here that I'd never really spoken to before or had a relationship with, because that would be. Very different. Very, there would be no backstory there. So yes, so today we want to talk a little bit about some of Jade's strengths, I will call them. So Jade is a Woomhara what would you call it? Like a healing? Woomhara healing? Yeah, Woomhara

Jade: 3:12

therapist. Therapist.

Stacey: 3:14

Therapist. Yeah. And also sound healing, woman's circles. I could go on. I could go on. Yeah. Yeah. We're going to cover the main ones today. Maybe we'll get you back at a later date and we'll cover some of the others. Yeah. And we sort of wanted to talk a little bit about the hustle and flow state and honoring the season you're in. So especially in business, right. We were often so It's stuck in the hustle and this podcast, of course, is anti hustle culture, anti bro hustle culture, I should say. So we want to talk a little bit about flowing into those states as opposed to, you know, when you're in that season and you feel like you're pushing and pushing and pushing. How you can recognize that. And so for you, Jade, how do you feel like you recognize when you're in a flow state versus when you're in a hustle state?

Jade: 4:12

Hmm. Yeah, thank you for such a great question. When I am in a sort of hustle state, or like, trying to like, get things moving, and it feels, it feels like my head is like, up against the wall, and I'm like there with like, my little chiseler, like chiseling away, and it doesn't feel easy, and like, there's obviously nuance within this, right, because there is obviously that point of Like, being so immersed in your work and like, energy's flowing and you're like, getting shit done and like, you know, ticking off the boxes, ticking off the to dos, whatever it may be. Like, you're in for your full creation, like, state, versus like, this hustle culture or this like, mentality of like, fuck, I need to like, get this done in order to like, like, tick that off to move on to the next phase and it can be like quite consuming and you feel, I feel like the difference is when there's like this expectation and you're trying to like meet this expectation of self for whatever reason that may be versus flow state which is like Energy is like moving and you're getting things done, but it feels really easeful and it feels like you're gaining energy from that, like that you're gaining momentum along with that. It's like this beautiful co creation energy.

Stacey: 5:48

Yeah, I agree with that. Yeah. And things are just,

Jade: 5:51

yeah,

Stacey: 5:53

rather than it coming from you. It's not being sent from you, you're drawing it into you.

Jade: 5:58

Yeah. And like, it's this beautiful unfolding, like when you're in that flow state or you're in like your Dharma or you're in your purpose or whatever you want to call it like the beautiful unfoldings of that, like the synchronicities and like the, just magic that happens within that space versus in like hustle energy or like trying to achieve, to get your desired outcome, sometimes there's not that. Like there's not those beautiful synchronicities or like that ease or like the unfolding of magic, which I feel is the difference.

Stacey: 6:40

Just be careful that you're not knocking the microphone, just as a side note that I will

Jade: 6:44

Okay, I'm probably knocking the table. Yeah. Get

Stacey: 6:48

super passionate. I can hear a few little knocks, but I'm not sure if it'll come in. Knocks. Yeah. Yes, but the, to be able to Receive that flow state I think is something as well because we were talking before about the receptivity of that magic and I feel like we sometimes have this belief that things have to be hard in order for that for us to have earned them. And so sometimes it can be a belief that can block us there about thinking, okay, well, we need to know this is too easy. Making money is too easy. I shouldn't be this easy. I shouldn't be able to have. Sales come in every day without me having to do something for it. I know I've definitely felt like that very much. Like every time I get a sale and I haven't, it's a digital product and I have to do something. I can't just allow this to flow through me. It should be hard. So that's really coming from that pattern and that belief of thinking that things do need to be hard, but actually do they, do they always need to be hard? Do, does creating content need to be hard? Like this for me is fun. It's not hard. Whereas sometimes creating different types of content feels very hard for me. Maybe it's just because that's not the type that I should be creating. Maybe that's the type that is not my zone of creation. Maybe that's why, because I'm trying to push through something that people have said, well that's what you should be doing. Maybe that's not what I should be focusing on. All my energy is done because it's really hard for me.

Jade: 8:24

What's like dropped in for me when you're speaking about this, like, Oh this piece around like, Oh, it has for me to make money. It has to be hard or have to like be putting some effort there and it has to feel Like this sort of equal exchange. Like, that's what I'm sort of hearing. And what's dropped into me is like the broader perspective outside of even business or outside of even making money. It's, we live in a very transactional conditioned society. So it's like, you know I do this, I receive, you know, it's like very transactional, like, you know and I feel. That's why we have a lot of stuff around receiving money. That's just like receiving money and like that's such a big topic in general. But it's like even we break it down even like on in relationships or even like With the relationships and dynamics with our parents, like for a lot of us, it's like, Oh, I did this thing and I received love or like, I'm in this friendship or romantic relationship. And I do this and I respect this. Like I go to work and I do this and I expect this. Like, so of course, when we come up to business and making money, it's like, Oh, I didn't do anything. So like, how can I receive that? Yeah.

Stacey: 9:49

There's often an internal ledger we have too, isn't there all. Weighing up two separate things of giving and receiving and always needing to be in sort of balance. But I think sometimes there are invisible things that we have done to receive things. But then we stack up the things that we have to do in order to receive and it's ten to one. So it's ten things that I have to do in order to receive one tiny little thing. I remember I was at a business event once and it was a workshop that went over a couple of days and the lady said at the end of it, give yourself a treat. You know, you've done all this work, you've done all this training, and the lady just said, oh, like, I was thinking, like, maybe make myself a cup of tea. And the facilitator just went, what? No, that's like bigger than a cup of tea.

Jade: 10:42

And I just thought that was so sweet that she was just

Stacey: 10:45

thought, you know, that was, that was all that was due back for her for all the effort and energy she'd put in. So yeah, sometimes it's not. there's a discrepancy between what we think we should receive as to what we've put

Jade: 10:57

in. Yeah, for sure. And like, this still props up in my own life in all different areas. It's like, oh, I didn't, Like it even happened, like we were out the other the other night and this is like a bit off topic but I had this really beautiful conversation with someone and they were giving me all these compliments and I was like, I didn't do anything. And I was like, wow, that's so interesting watching that thought, like. Why do I feel like I had to do something in order to receive a beautiful compliment about I am, and I received a beautiful compliment. I didn't have to do anything being me is enough in this moment in every moment. So when we like watch, and this is where like business is so infiltrated in all areas of our life and psyche, it's like in the example you gave about like receiving money, it's like where else in your life do those thoughts? come in or that can, that belief, those belief systems and conditionings come in. And a great example with like, Oh, I just wanted to reward myself with a cup of tea. It's like, fuck, why do we like Rob ourselves of like spoiling the shit of our shit out of ourselves and like stepping more and more into pleasure and like really like allowing ourselves to receive.

Stacey: 12:29

I got chills when you were saying, where have we robbed ourselves? And I just, I think I just felt like a lifetime of. Like robbing myself, flash before my eyes of, yep, I feel that, I feel that, what have we robbed ourselves of because we've been conditioned otherwise, because we've conditioned to become these capitalist productivity machines where nothing is ever enough, ever, ever, ever, at the end of the day, most people think that because we've done surveys on this for different companies and things, but most people will say they'll lie in bed at 3am and they'll just think, What did I do today? When they've done a lot, when they've done a real lot, and also as you were speaking about when you were receiving a compliment, it's like we can't receive a compliment just for who we are because we're conditioned not to. We should be able to receive a compliment for who we are because when we're born, when we're babies, we're precious, we're a miracle, we're beautiful, we're a perfect miracle. And then we start to un become a miracle as we get older. We start to have to earn. Right. Whereas when we're born, we're a perfect miracle, but somehow that starts to undo as we grow for some weird reason. Mm-Hmm. That we are not a miracle anymore, just to Yeah. Be as we are in

Jade: 13:53

our essence. Yeah. And there's so many reasons on why I believe that is like, just in the sense of like the capital. holistic culture that we've created this like hustle culture of like achieving and that equals, that equals something and also like this other piece around. We often don't honor, like, the rites of passage that we move across throughout our lifetime. And, yeah, just like the, in, like, the hyper independence culture as well. I feel feeds into this as well. So it's like all these different facets that feed into this narrative that you're speaking about of like, yeah, we're born this beautiful like miracle and everyone's like, Oh my gosh, yeah. And then like, as we age, it's like, we feel like we have to do something in order to receive or oftentimes don't feel good enough that when that core belief comes in. Which I feel is from all these different facets of how we are raised in this society. And it's like, how often do we forget that, oh, this person sitting across from me has blood pumping through their veins and is a, is a live amazing being like that is so amazing. Like, how often do we forget that? It's like, we're all here trying our best. We all have blood pumping through us, we're alive, like, that's a fucking miracle, like, the humanness of that, like, how often do we forget, like, what it actually means to be alive? Which, yeah, we've gone super off, like, no, super meta now, but, you know, cause we're so fucking busy. And

Stacey: 15:53

like, how much our heart beats for us every day, how breathing happens for us automatically, we don't have to think about breathing. Although now I've said it, you've probably started thinking about it, but we don't have to consciously do all these things, our body is working for us all the time, and we, it's just a given to us and we do forget, so thank you for that beautiful reminder. So, okay, so, one other mantra that helps me to get through that mode that I've been using for a couple of months is like, I am who I am, and that is enough. And that's something that people can, if you're listening, that you can use for yourself if you're thinking, I need to come back to myself of, I'm stressed, I'm living in this chronic state of stress and hustle and I, I can't seem to catch a breath. Like, I am who I am and that is enough. And just come back to that because, I know that we are all, a lot of us are living in this constant state of stress, so what we're trying to help you to, to undo that a little bit, a little and come back and to reframe that mindset around how amazing it is that we're even here in the first place.

Jade: 17:04

That's a really beautiful mantra. I love having like mantras like that, that just bring me back to a feeling or state that I'm wanting to step into more.

Stacey: 17:15

I want to go into what you were talking about before we jumped on the episode about when something is a full body yes and when it's a no. So I would like to ask you about this because I feel like, I feel like you've had some specific experiences recently where you've really known that it was a no. and what that felt like and if you can just go for us so we can sort of see if anything in our own lives feels like that too.

Jade: 17:45

Yeah, sure. Cool. I'm just Okay, so, like, this phrase, if it's not a full body yes, it's a no, like, really dropped into my field a few years ago, and I was like, what does that even mean? And then it's only been in the last, like, year and a bit that I've been like, Oh, I understand what that means. And it's a mantra that I like, or a saying that I go back to quite a lot. Cause I'm like, Oh fuck, I say that to myself. I'm like, Oh shit, I have to make a decision about something. So it's like good, like what do you call that? That's like it's good. It like keeps me on track. What's the word for that? It's like good like I'm just trying to think of the word. It's good accountability. That's the word that I was looking for. Yeah, so sorry. Yeah, I can start again. So this saying, like, it's a, If it's not a full body, yes, it's a no came into my field a few years ago, and I've only really understood what that meant in the last like year and a bit. And it's a really beautiful saying that I come back to because it, it's like an accountability piece where I'm like, Oh, fuck, that doesn't feel like a full body as I have to make a decision or do something about this, I have to change this in my life. So yeah, great accountability tool keeps me. In integrity, in my values, on my path forward, and what it feels like to me is because I have such a attunement to my body, I know when things aren't a yes, like I know when things don't feel like a complete truth to me. And It's a bit hard to explain because it's such a visceral thing, but to really build that connection with yourself takes, like, becoming, coming deeper into the body, right? Because, and this is, like, gonna go a little bit, like, off again, but when we have situations that happen to us, Like trauma or situations such as like our soul fragments, right? This is like my like teachings and beliefs. So our soul fragments in that point of time. And so when we eventually come back more and more into the body, we're like becoming more and more whole again, right? We're coming, we're like literally coming back into the body more and more. So because I've over the years done so much of this work like trying to come back into my body more and more and more calling back parts of myself into this, like anchoring them into this present moment now, I feel so deeply attuned to my body, like, in this present moment.

Stacey: 20:39

I love the, I love the piece about the soul fragmenting and very tuned in for that.

Jade: 20:45

Yes. So when things don't feel like a yes, I'm very aware of it. Like it doesn't feel, it doesn't feel easy. It doesn't feel in that flow. It feels like a no, and it's like in my gut and in my heart. That's where I feel it mostly. And I could say probably people relate to this. If you. Like, for example, if you like go and meet someone and you're like, Oh, there's something like off about that person, or if you your energy isn't like in residence or you are like seeing someone or you're in a relationship long term and you're like, Oh, this isn't like, this isn't like my, my person, but it feels good like in this current moment, but there's something like underneath that, that you, that sometimes we don't want to look at because we're scared of what. The consequence might be or like you're in a job which doesn't feel a hundred percent in alignment, but you're like, Oh, I need, I have, you know, this, this and this responsibility or these bills to pay. So those are like sort of examples I could give if that resonates, like, if you feel resonates. So it's like that deep seated thing that we know.

Stacey: 22:01

Yes, I definitely know what it's like to say to myself, Hmm, something off about this person. I don't know what it is, but I'll just feel funny. It just feels like there's something off there. And it might not be that the person is off themselves, but the frequency between me and the person is off. So they might be okay with a different person, but for me and that person, then I'll know, okay. It's not that there's anything wrong specifically with that person, but then you know for you that that's not the right frequency or that's not the right Path for you to go down and it's the same as starting a new position or a new project with a client I think that that's similar to what you're talking about too, about knowing whether or not. Yeah And we we do and you know, most mostly we know this as our intuition, don't we? And we can feel like yeah It's

Jade: 22:58

like your intuition. Yeah, for sure Should

Stacey: 23:02

we should we take that position? Should we take on that role? Should we do that thing? And, you know, the head is saying, just do it, you need to take this opportunity and the gut is like, no, not the right way, not the right way, not the right way, but we ignore it sometimes and then what is, what happens normally when we ignore?

Jade: 23:22

Well, from my example, from my experience, sorry, from my experience, when we don't listen to it, it ends up being a whole lot more energy and work in the long run than it Is to just like make that decision in that moment and move forward. Like, I'm sure you've had have you had like clients that have come to you that have been like a bit more energy and there's been a little bit of dissonance at the start and then you've just taken them on and then it's been like such a head fuck the whole, like, however long we've worked with them. And it's like, if you just make that one decision that you knew you needed to make, but you didn't make. Like it just ends up being like, Oh shit, I've got a big lesson to learn in this one. And that's like the beautiful process of life, right?

Stacey: 24:12

It just, and it takes so much time to come back to where you were before. I mean, the lessons are always great because obviously you needed to learn them. Otherwise it wouldn't have happened. But yeah, I feel like sometimes I can waste a year and a huge chunk of. my creativity and my time and everything when that's not what I was supposed to be doing but in a way I was because I need to learn a lesson to not do it again but yes very much.

Jade: 24:41

Yeah and this is like I also feel feeds into like Quantum leaping or like living in your highest truth and like highest potential. Right. It's like if we bypass all this fucking wasted time, if we just made a decision in that moment, like then we're able to progress quicker to where we want to, to where we want to be. And sometimes obviously we have to learn the lessons along the way, which is the beautiful thing. Because. Learning is great and we wouldn't be who we are without those lessons. But just being really attuned to your intuition. And Saying no to things that aren't a full body yes, or making decisions that aren't a full, like, to not do something that isn't a full body yes. Yeah, I mean, we'll just bypass you. So much wasted time.

Stacey: 25:32

So, okay, so to kind of tie everything together today. Can you tell us a couple of the specific modalities that you've used in your life that you love? That you use to tune back in, because people are probably thinking well okay, well how do I, how do I know whether this is a yes or a no, and how do I know to come back to myself as a whole, like what do people need to look out for, what can they do?

Jade: 25:58

Yeah. And this is like what I was sort of trying to speak about before with like trauma or disassociation or being in different states where we like soul fragment in that time and then like rehabilitate, like re entering into the body and becoming more and more whole and becoming more and more like in this moment present. And that's when our intuition will come more online because it's like we're inhabiting, inhabiting, is that a word? Inhabitating?

Stacey: 26:27

I'm not sure.

Jade: 26:28

Inhabitating the body. We're, we're inhabiting the body more and more. So that's when your intuition will come more online and to get like to that phase of like coming more and more into the body because we live in such a dissociated society is through things like nervous system work, breath work, somatic work. Yeah, anything to get you into the body, anything to like release anything that's stuck so that energy can move out and more of you can come and land in, it's gonna be really helpful. And there's, yeah. Yeah, well, massage just is like a form of somatic work, like somatic body work. Yeah, well, like, a big one that I like working with is massage, because it's like, we can hold so many points of tension within the body. So with Wim Ho Massage, that's like a big one for women. Yeah, because we're very disconnected from our cycles in general, cyclical living in general. yEah, but I feel like people can just do this at home, like breath work, listen to a sound healing. Yeah. Yeah.

Stacey: 27:45

Yeah. Yeah, beautiful. And I think, yeah, I think that was the last little piece that we wanted to discuss today was about honoring the season you're in. So tell us about some of the ways that you honor the season that you're in, like an example that you might have to wrap us up today. Yeah.

Jade: 28:09

Sorry. Well, I feel like the last few years I've been like in a, in that, like honoring the season of life of just being in that like, Oh fuck, I feel like I'm in the washing machine and like, I want to be. I want to be here. I want to be like here in my business. I want to have achieved these goals in life, blah, blah, blah. And it just isn't what's true in this present moment. Because there's other lessons and other things that I need to like weed out and look at before I can progress to the next stage. So that's looked like being slow and just literally like being in the process and honoring that and not trying to speed it up because I feel like sometimes when we're in the mud or we're navigating some hard times and our external world feels like it's falling apart we want to fix it we want to get there we got all the tools and we're like let's fucking build the house again and it's like just let the house crumble a little bit and like you Why are we trying to rush out of process? Like, and that's obviously not to say You know, there's nuance in this as well because it's like being like just fully like stuck in the victim can also be sort of counterintuitive to that, but I feel like just being with what life is presenting you feeling it. Transmuting it and moving forward into the next aligned action. Yeah, because yeah, sometimes we can be like, fuck, there's all this shit happening and then like, make ourselves the victim. And that's okay to be in the victim for a little bit, but it's like, okay, let's try, let's feel it through the body, transmute it and then move forward.

Stacey: 30:01

I think so much more can be said for letting the house crumble, because as you said that, I felt such relief. I was like, yeah, just let it crumble. That's okay. Why do, why are we trying to run around and fix everything? It's so true, we're always trying to run around and fix everything all the time. Just let it crumble. Sometimes things need to crumble. It's like the tower card, if anyone knows tarot. Yeah, I remember

Jade: 30:24

you were getting that.

Stacey: 30:26

Yeah, you get, I was, I kept getting, I've been getting it the last couple weeks, and the message keeps saying, just let it fall. And I'm like, oh, I can't. You know, you think you can't, but yeah, you actually need to. Sometimes you need to clear all of that that comes down, all the rubble for something new to be built. Yeah,

Jade: 30:47

exactly. And I feel like we're so wanting to fix because we're so afraid of sitting in the uncomfortability or in the mess of what it is to like, live this human experience. Like everyone wants to patch it all up and like, Oh, I'm good. You know, I've got, you know, I'm great. Whatever. And it's like, yeah, just be in your messiness.

Stacey: 31:10

It's like,

Jade: 31:10

yeah. So afraid to feel. Yeah. Oh. Yes. So just gently, like, it's like gently lifting, like the kettle lid, letting a little bit of steam out, like, and building your capacity with that, right? It's like, cause if, if this has been, and this was true for me, like my whole life feeling mostly dissociated and then only in the last five or so years, like slowly, like opening up that, letting a little bit of steam out of time. And it's like, oh, then it grows your capacity to be able to hold what's happening. To be able to hold emotion. The

Stacey: 31:52

steamer, little bit by little bit. Yeah. A little bit at a time. Just let it out.

Jade: 31:56

Yeah. A little bit. So when the house is crumbling, You're like, Oh fuck, I've been here before. I'm like in my centre.

Stacey: 32:05

Yeah. I love that. What a beautiful way to wrap up the episode. I love that. So many analogies. I'm actually going to go and listen to this again once I go through and edited and everything. So yeah, beautiful. I feel like we have so much more to say, but we only have so much time. So I'll just say a really big thing. Thank you to Jade. If you want to contact Jade about potentially working with her about doing some sound healing some one on one sessions to discover these. pieces inside of you, I will leave her show notes, her links in the show notes, and you can contact her through her website or her Instagram at TheMysticMu, and the website is TheMysticMu. com. And yeah, feel free to reach out if you have any questions.