Hi , this is Carolyn , and I'm here with Erin , and we are so excited to have Christine from the Tennis Mind here with us . She coaches players on the mental game . She is a local league coordinator and a 4-0 tennis player , so she knows what it's like to be out in the trenches on adult recreational court . So , christine , thank you so much for being here . Can you tell us a little bit about your background and why you started coaching tennis players on the mental game ?
Speaker 3Well , thanks for having me . First of all , I'm super excited to be here . You guys have been amazing , and Erin actually was my very first opponent when I moved here to North Carolina in December , so it was super fun .
Speaker 1I didn't know that was your first match yeah , my very first match . And she beat me terribly . No , that is not true , and she's very good .
Speaker 3But I got into life coaching leadership coaching , oh gosh probably about 20 years ago and got certified it's George Washington University in DC when I lived there and I learned a lot of theory but I never really did anything with it . I became a teacher and a principal and did all sorts of other things , so I was able to integrate some of these skills but never really had any specific tools . And so a few years ago I decided I want to pursue life coaching again . So I found a place I wanted to recertify and kind of brush up on my skills , and this place that I got certified was amazing because they actually provided me with tools that I could use and teach others , and so I've been able to not only coach others in anything , because I don't need to be the expert , I just need to know the questions to ask to actually get people noticing what thoughts that they have , and that's really what it's all about . So I coached myself .
Speaker 3It has been absolutely life changing for me in all areas of my life and I've really noticed it in tennis and I've actually had a lot of people when I was doing coaching with other people saying you should coach tennis players . I'm like , oh , I don't know . That seems weird , but suddenly I started doing it because I love it , because I relate to them and I have struggled with the mental game and all different sports throughout my whole life and so , being in the trenches with those people , I get it . I struggle every day , just like everyone else , because I have a human brain , and so now I'm just decided to put my focus on coaching tennis players and I am loving it . I'm loving every minute of it .
Speaker 1And it's so funny because I'm sure there's a million books written on the subject and studies done but I think what's known is that a lot of us have the same skills , but the differences in our tennis games often are mental .
Speaker 3Right , absolutely , absolutely .
Speaker 1And so we could be exactly the same skill set . But if you think differently than I think , or like you and I did , I know this is jumping ahead , but we all did a little session with you . Carolyn and I each did a little session with you , and one of the things I think I told you was in singles , for some reason I walk out on the court and I'm like , oh , I might have a good match . I'm not sure if I'll win or lose . I'm going to try my best sort of thing . And I think your question to me was like why don't you feel like you belong there , like you are the same level as everybody ? And so from then on , most of my singles matches I still have to remind myself , most of my singles matches , I literally say to myself in my brain I am supposed to be here , this is my level , I deserve to be here , I know I can win , and before it was just like I'm not really sure . You know it's just kind of unsure stepping on the court .
Speaker 3So that's awesome and that is such a huge shift .
Speaker 1Yeah , it's a big shift that one little it's , but it's tiny , but it's , but it makes a huge difference .
Speaker 3So your little shift in your thought can change everything about your tennis , and that's really what I try and teach people is . It's not about having this amazing you know oh , I've got to think all these perfect thoughts , but it's just a lot of recognition and just being coming aware of what you're thinking and then decide is that really true or not ? You know , I'm a 4-0 . I belong here , or whatever . Whatever , your thoughts are Good job .
Speaker 1Thank you , good job to you . So are there ? Have you heard common issues from adult rec players , like , are there , you know ? Does it seem like a lot of people have the same issues , or are they all over the board ?
Speaker 3Well , it's funny because , you know , a lot of times people come to me with specific issues . But what I notice more is when I'm out among everyone and I'm playing and I see a very a couple of really common threats that I see . One of them a lot of times is oh , I practice well and I do drills well and I do everything right when I'm with my teaching pro , but then I get into a match and it all just goes away and I get tight and I start to choke and then I can't perform and they're so frustrated because they think what's the difference ? You know why ? Why can I do so well in practice or at drills ? But then I get into a match where it matters and suddenly I can't perform and really , if you really break it down and look at it , you're literally hitting a tennis ball over a net back and forth in practice or in a match .
Speaker 3It doesn't matter where you're performing that , but it's the exact same circumstance in either way . The only difference is what our thoughts
are about it . So let's say we get into a match . Maybe it's a playoff , you know , to go to the championships , or you're getting ready to go to states or sectionals or just a regular local league match and suddenly the thoughts kind of seep in of , well , I don't want to let anyone down , or I don't want to disappoint anyone , I don't want to let my partner down that's a very common one in doubles or I don't want to let my team down .
Speaker 3It's we're two and two and I wear the deciding line . All of a sudden all this stuff comes into our head or other things like I don't want to lose and feel stupid , or I don't want to feel embarrassed , you know . All of those things come in and suddenly we feel pressure . So it's not that it's the circumstance of playing in a playoff match . That is pressure , it's our thoughts . And so when you're practicing , there's no pressure ever really , I mean unless your coach , your captain or your coaches are watching you and judging you or whatever .
Speaker 1But that's typically not happening . It's a tryout and you don't know it .
Speaker 3Exactly , you're right , carolyn . Yes , and I heard that that happens . Yes , so it's about really recognizing what your thoughts are . Because you're creating your pressure , people will come off and say , oh well , I just felt so much pressure . That's on you , that's because of your thoughts . So I help people recognize what they're thinking in practice , in drills , in matches . Then they get to decide if they want to keep those thoughts or if they want to create better thoughts for themselves . So that's one thing that I see that's very common is the practice versus the real game mentality , and it just shows that you're doing the same thing . It's just your thoughts shift . So that's one big thing .
Speaker 3The other one I see a lot of is when you're struggling in a match or you're not playing your best , we all want to blame something , and so it's easy to want to go outside ourselves and say , well , you know , doubles players , all of my partner would pick it up and play whether you know , then we can win A big one . I hear a lot is is if only my opponent would give me the right ball so that I can hit it . How often here they didn't have any pace on the ball , therefore I couldn't play my game . Well , what opponent wants to give you a ball that you want to hit ? Or they talk about the weather , you know , oh , it was so windy . I , you know , I couldn't hit my ball because it's windy , or the sun's in my eyes , or there's a bug . And actually the bug is my thing , because when I was in Texas I had no idea . I had a total phobia of crickets , and in the fall , there's about six weeks when the weather just starts to turn that the crickets at night they swarm the lights and they dive bomb on the court and it's crazy , there'll be hundreds of crickets on the court . Well , I'm out there playing with my husband and we're in a , we're in a match playing mixed . All of a sudden , all these bugs start coming and I freak out . I mean I'm like I can't , I mean I was having a panic attack , I couldn't handle it , and so it's been a longstanding joke , because that was like 15 years ago , right , still , all there's a cricket , christine , and I'm out . I'm even if it's one . So that's one thing I still need to work on is getting over my mentality of the bugs .
Speaker 3But whatever it is , when you're looking outside yourself , you're handing over your control , you become powerless because you can't control anything outside yourself . So it's best to take full responsibility for how you're playing , no matter how your opponent's hitting , no matter how your partner's hitting . And it doesn't mean you're taking full responsibility of your win or your loss , but you're taking responsibility of yourself . And so then you don't have to feel so frustrated , because when you're frustrated then you're going to want to over hit , you're going to give up , or you're going to get angry and maybe say something that you regret or create tension , and those things don't help you win a match .
Speaker 3So it's keeping that responsibility within yourself and saying what can I do ? My partner is struggling right now , so how can I help my partner ? Or how can I show up in my best way and be supportive ? Or my opponent is a is a total pusher and I wish that she would just hit the ball harder so I can play better . No , what can I do to create the pace that I want for my game ? You know it's taking that responsibility back . It gives you so much more control , you feel more empowered and then you tend to play better . So it's hard to do in the moment . I mean , I get frustrated just like everybody else , but it's a good reminder . So those are two common things that I see quite a bit when I'm on the court , when I'm competing , and then when I'm also talking to clients as well .
Speaker 1Do you have a few ? I know there's a lot and this is a short conversation for a very large topic , but do you have a few tips for the mental game ?
Speaker 3Yeah , I would say we all have human brains , like I mentioned before , and our higher brain is our prefrontal cortex and it's really full of ideas , it's creative , it's I wonder you know full of possibility . It's the one that thinks I can do this , I'm up for the challenge , I want to play . And that's the fun part . You know , we get excited , we get up for stuff , we want to challenge ourselves . And then we've got our lower brain , who it's kind of from the old days of , you know , protecting you from being eaten by an animal . You know it senses danger , and so then it's going to be chirping in your ear . And so you've got these two brains kind of battling each other . And so when you got into the tennis court , you have your higher brain who's like yeah , I'm up for the challenge , I could do this , it's going to be great . And then your lower brain is saying but what if you lose ? Well , what if you feel embarrassed ? What if you look stupid ? You know , what if you let your partner down and yourself down and your team down ? And those doubts start to creep in . And so there's two brains kind of fighting against each other , and they're both always going to be there .
Speaker 3That's the thing is , I still battle those little , that lower brain , all the time as well .
Speaker 3But I get to decide because I have that recognition now , so I can decide which brain do I want to listen to today , you know .
Speaker 3Do I want to fall into the trap of , oh , you're not good enough , you can't do it , or do I want to step up and say I'm going to give it my , I'm going to give it the best that I've got ? That's one thing I teach my clients how to do is to recognize who's talking to them and then helping them make a decision on which brain they want to listen to , because they're both going to be there . And sometimes , when those doubts creep in and that lower brain is talking to you , it's easy to think , oh no , see , I can't do it . I can't do it because you want to believe them , because they've been there the whole , your whole life trying to protect you . And so thank you , thank you , little low brain , for trying to protect me , but I don't need you , I'm going to be just fine , you know . So that's that's one thing is recognizing the higher and lower brain activity and making a conscious decision to go with the higher brain when you can .
Speaker 3You know , but it's not always easy and sometimes you just jump off the cliff and you're just going to have a bad match and a bad day and it's okay . So another thing that and I think this is so critical is we all say , oh , if I could just get a couple of wins under my belt , then I'll feel confident . You know how many times have you heard that in your life ? And really the result doesn't ever create confidence Never . Confidence creates the result . And so it's all about going in with confidence before the match . And then the other thing is people think that confidence is oh , I can win and I'm the best and I'm going to . You know I'll never lose and whatever . That's not it at all .
Speaker 3Self confidence is just knowing you can handle anything that comes your way . So if you go into any match you play whether you're playing up or you're playing your level or you're playing down or whatever going into that match and saying I know I'm going to be okay , no matter what . I can face anything , because I've already done it all . I felt embarrassed before . I felt ashamed , I felt stupid . We've all survived that . Does it feel good ? No , but we will survive that . So I decide ahead of time I'm going to go in with confidence that I'm going to be okay . So if I lose 6-0 , 6-0 , I'll be disappointed , but I'm still going to be just fine . And it helps you to relax and know that I don't have to win . Now , of course , you're fighting to win and you want to win and you're going to give it your all . But how many times do we show up with our A-game ? You know we don't get to have our A-game all the time . So sometimes you've got to win ugly . You're going to lose ugly . That's usually the worst option , but it's just what happens Sometimes . It's just going to happen . I had one of those a few weeks ago and I come off and I'm like darn the difference between me now and what I used to be , because I used to put so much emphasis on my self-worth and my self-confidence of you know , if I'm winning , then I'm worthy or whatever . You know Now I don't make winning or losing mean anything . It's nothing about me , it's just how I showed up and how I played that match . It's who my opponent was .
Speaker 3I lost a match recently , one and oh , in a singles match . I was playing up and it was a great singles match . I really didn't even feel like I played that badly , but she just was doing everything a little bit better and I just wasn't able to get in the match and win the points . And I had lots of break points , I had lots of doos games . I couldn't win the points to get the games and so the score looked terrible and I got off the court .
Speaker 3I'm just like , how did that happen ? I'm not sure , and I'm sure if we played again , we might have a better score I could win . Maybe she'll beat me again , but it's coming off the court no matter what happens , and saying , hey , this doesn't change anything about me , it's literally just a tennis match . And then continuing to go on . And because what will happen is , when you go in with that self confidence , you're going to win a lot more matches . It's insane how that shifts . Instead of depending on the wins in order to feel confident so you can win more , just decide that you're going to be confident . And that's something else I help my clients with , because they think , well , I don't know how to feel confident . I don't think I can do that . Everybody can do it and I can teach you how .
Speaker 2Thanks very much to Christine for being on the podcast . We have another episode with Christine where she will give more mental tips , including what to do with bad line calls . If you'd like to get more information or reach out to Christine , you can go to wwwthetennismindcom and , as a listener of SecondServe , you can get $50 off any package when you plug in the discount code SecondServePodcast . Thanks so much for listening and hope to see you on the courts soon .