It's A Single Mom Thing - NOT The Single Thing That Stops You!

It’s a Single Mom Thing, Not the Thing That Stops Her

Have you ever had a dream so big it scared you? That’s your HBAG — your Hairy Big Audacious Goal. And mama, being a single mom isn’t the stop sign to that dream. It’s your launchpad.

In this episode of It’s a Single Mom Thing, Sherry flips the script on excuses and equips you with practical strategies and faith-filled encouragement to help you chase your God-sized goals without burning out.

You’ll discover:
 💡 Why being a single mom is not a limitation but a strength
 🔥 How to set excuses aside while keeping your dreams alive
 ❤️ Why YOU are worth the investment — and how your growth blesses your kids
 🙌 How to move from Fear Factor to the Faith Factor
✨ Simple questions to reflect on and dream again

Mama, you are capable, called, and more than enough. And those baby steps you take? They still move mountains. 🌄

🎧 Listen now and be reminded: It’s a Single Mom Thing, not the thing that stops you.

👉 shepherdsvillage.com/podcast
or your favorite podcast streaming platform.

Chapters

• 0:00 Welcome to It's a Single Mom Thing
• 18:14 ] Questions to Spark Your Journey
• 19:39 Introducing the H-Bag Concept
• 20:54 ] Closing Thoughts and Sponsor Thanks

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Welcome to it's a Single Mom Thing, the show for single moms by single moms. This is Sherri, your host, and I am happy you are here today. Remember it's a single mom thing and not the single thing that stops you.

Speaker 2: 0:15

What up, ladies? Welcome back to another episode of it's a Single Mom Thing. So today I want to talk to you about something a little hairy Not your legs, maybe about something a little hairy not your legs, maybe even something a little scary, and that's your H-bag. Yep, you heard me right. That's your hairy, big, audacious goal. You know, the one, that dream that's been sitting in the back of your mind, tugging at your heart, the one that feels a little too big, a little too bold, maybe even a little too impossible. And let's be real as single moms, we are masters at putting our own dreams on the back burner. We'll chase down everybody else's goals Our kids', sports, their schooling, their future but when it comes to our own, we whisper not now, no, not me, not with everything I've got going on in my plate. No, no, no, now's not the time. Sister, that's a trap. You see, we start thinking I can't because I'm a single mom. But ladies, listen, hear me out and hear me loud and clear. Being a single mom is not you heard me not the thing that stops you. It's a single mom thing, and that means you've already got grit, resilience and determination baked right into you. Think about it. You've already survived things you didn't think you could. You've stretched dollars, managed schedules, carried loads bigger than you thought possible and, on top of all that, you loved your kids through the hardest of days. And guess what? That same strength, that same courage, that same what I like to call never give up spirit. It's the very thing you need to go after, that big, hairy, audacious goal H-bag. So today I want to help you flip that script. Instead of seeing single motherhood as your limitation, oh no, we are going to make it our launching pad Because, ladies, you are worth the investment and the return isn't just success, it is blessings beyond your belief.

Speaker 2: 2:26

Excuses versus dreams. Now let's talk about the tug of war we all face with excuses versus dreams. See, excuses are sneaky. They sound reasonable and even noble, sometimes, like I don't have time because my kids need me, or I don't have money because I'm putting it all into their household, or the big one, oh, I'll just wait until things calm down. Well, let me give you a holy hold up for a second, please. But let me ask you this when has life ever truly calmed down? Exactly, if I had waited until the right time to have my son, I would have never had him, and he's one of the biggest blessings of my life.

Speaker 2: 3:13

Sometimes I have found the things we think we need to wait for are the very thing God has already prepared us for and for me. Let me just tell you this way I have to keep this in forefront of my mind all the time. I may not be a single mom anymore, but I am still single and I still have dreams and goals. I could easily let the quote unquote single thing become a repeated excuse, but you know what that does? It keeps me stuck in the mud. It keeps me from growing and maybe even from becoming the woman God is shaping me to be Curves and all I can relate to not having a spouse to push you forward, to catch you when you fall or to encourage you to just keep swimming. But here's the truth my dreams are still for me, even if I don't have a quote unquote we and the same is true for you, girl you see excuses. They keep us safe, but they also keep us stuck. They shrink our world until all that's left is survival mode. And survival mode is not where God designed you to live Now. That bears repeating. Okay, listen, survival is not where God designed you to live.

Speaker 2: 4:35

Now let's flip this. Okay, dreams what do they do? They expand your world. Dreams make room for growth, for possibility, for joy. Dreams, girls, listen. Shows your kids what faith and action looks like when they see you daring to go after something bigger than yourself. You're not just teaching them to dream, you are teaching them to believe, to believe something bigger beyond themselves.

Speaker 2: 5:04

And here's some more truth. You're not disqualified because you're a single mom. You're not behind, you're not too late. You, my sister, are right on time and your dream is still alive. So today, I want you to make a decision to set aside the excuses, but listen, not your dreams. Okay, put the I can't because I'm a single mom. Lie in the trash where it belongs and pick up the truth. And that is because I am a single mom. I already know how to fight, how to persevere and how to rise. Oh, that gets two snaps and a circle. Yes, girl, yes, you see, excuses shrink you, but dreams, they expand you. So which one are you going to let win? Worth the investment? All right, now, now that we have talked about setting excuses aside, let's talk about why you're worth the investment. Here's the thing We'll spend money and energy on our kids without even thinking twice. Am I right? Sports gear, you'll figure it out. Birthday parties, field trips, braces, you'll move heaven and earth to make it happen, because you believe your kids are worth it. And, girl, they are.

Speaker 2: 6:25

But somewhere along the way we stop believing that we are worth it too. And not only do we stop believing it, we stop investing in ourselves. We convince ourselves with things like it's selfish to spend money on me. It is just so irresponsible to take time for me. My job is just to pour into them. It's not my time, but, ladies, listen, hear me out. When you invest in yourself, you're not taken away from your kids. Now let me say that again. When you invest in yourself, you're not taken away from your kids. You're multiplying what they receive. You are their foundation. And if the foundation crumbles, what happens to the house? But listen, when you take a class, pursue that degree, build that business or even take a day for rest, girl, you are showing your kids that mama doesn't just survive, no, she grows. And your growth gives them permission to grow too, even in the hard and the hurried of single mom life.

Speaker 2: 7:33

And let me bring this home okay, I know this one personally because, listen, there were many, I repeat many of times that I convinced myself I couldn't go after certain dreams because of the cost. Not just the money cost, but the time, the risk, the energy. But you know what? Then I realized, when I hold back from becoming all God created me to be, I'm not just shortchanging myself, I am shortchanging my family too. Listen, that's not what I wanted for my son. I didn't want to shortchange him, I wanted to make deposit into his future. The truth, ladies you are worth the time, you are worth the energy, you are worth the investment and the return. It's blessings beyond your belief, not just for you, but for your children and even their children. So the next time that little voice whispers you don't have the resources for this, I want you to say back oh no, I am the resource, I am the example and I am worth the investment. Be gone.

Speaker 2: 8:43

Thought Strategies for your HBag. So let's get a little practical. Okay, you've got this dream, this big, hairy, audacious goal, but how do you actually go after it without burning out or giving up? So let's break it down into some steps that you can start tracking on today. Step one dream big without an apology. Write your dream down, put it on paper, say it out loud, pray it out to God. Don't shrink your dream to fit your circumstances, okay, no, don't do that. Let your faith instead, expand your circumstances to fit your dream. Big dreams, honor a big God. And don't just tuck that dream away into a journal where no one else sees it. Write it I triple dog, dare you in hot pink lipstick on your mirror so it stares you down every morning. Stick it on your steering wheel so it drives you forward every time you get into the car. Let that dream become so visible you can't ignore it, and neither can your excuses.

Speaker 2: 9:55

Step two fail proof. And this is what I like to call. You heard me say it earlier the never give up. So here's the truth. Failure, girls, it isn't final, it's feedback. I love that one. Okay, now listen, when you hit a wall, don't just stop, just pivot. Ask what can I learn? How can I adjust Pivot? How can I learn? How can I adjust Pivot, pivot, pivot. Every setback, girls, is a set up for your comeback. Keep a little notebook or even a note in your phone called quote unquote lessons from the fall, every time something doesn't go as planned, and it will jot it down. That way, your failures actually become your fuel. Step three pace yourself. Now listen, this is a marathon, not a sprint. The fastest way, girls listen to kill a dream is burnout. Break your goal into smaller pieces. What I'm going to recommend Think about 90-day chunks, or even one baby step a day, because you remember, you've heard me say this in other podcasts baby steps make big dreams, and so I'm going to keep it real with you.

Speaker 2: 11:11

I had to live this one out recently. I am studying for my 63 hour pre-licensed course for real estate and I got listen over 385 note cards full of terms I have to learn. If I tried to tackle them all at once, I would drown. So here's what I did I divided those note cards and put each in a pile in its own. And then listen, I put it in its own color coded Ziploc bag, one color for each day of the week. Then each day, I would only listen, only review the stack in that bag, just that day's color, just that pile. Now, by the end of the week, I had worked through all of them without burning out. That's what pacing yourself looks like Breaking the overwhelming into doable. You don't climb a mountain in one leap. You know that you do it step by step. It step by step, color by color, card by card.

Speaker 2: 12:14

Step four build your dream team. Okay, listen, don't do it alone. You need, ladies, at least one person who will hold you accountable, cheer you on and remind you why you started. That could be a friend, a mentor, a coach or even a prayer partner. What I have found is that accountability is the oxygen that keeps your dream alive. I've seen this again in my own life. When I started down that real estate path I'm going to go there again I had a friend who came alongside me and said I'll mentor you, I'll keep you through this. And honestly, I don't know what I would have done if I hadn't had them to give me the courage to keep going without that accountability. Sometimes, just knowing someone's watching, encouraging and reminding you of your why is the difference between quitting and pressing on? So try this Send a weekly dream check. That's what I call it. It's a dream check text. Let's say, every Friday, message your person with one thing you did that week to move toward your goal and one thing you plan to do next week. Ladies, you will be amazed how much momentum comes from simply knowing someone is rooting for you.

Speaker 2: 13:32

Step five encouragement on the repeat Speak life over your dream. Every day Post-it notes, wear and post them everywhere you will see them your mirror, your fridge, your car. Write things like I am capable, I am consistent and I am called. And here's what I've learned. Sometimes I need to hear my own voice and remind me of the truth. So I'll even record myself on those little voice apps on your phone and saying something like an affirmation or a scripture and play it back when I'm driving or getting ready in the morning. Because, listen, if I don't fill my mind with encouragement, it is way too easy for discouragement to take over and sink a sister. So, listen, if the lies get loud and they will you've got to get louder with the truth, god's truth and your own voice, speaking life over your future. And can I just say this None of these steps require perfection. All they require is just a little persistence. The point isn't to get it all right and I have to remember that too it's to keep moving, one step at a time, with God leading the way.

Speaker 2: 14:51

The faith factor. Now, ladies, I can give you all the strategies in the world, but without faith you'll still run out of steam. Because here's the truth Going after a hairy, big, audacious goal isn't just about willpower, listen, it is about God power. Do you remember that old show, fear Factor, Some of you? Well, you might be a little too young, but it was all about facing these wild, crazy and over-the-top challenges to see who could overcome their fears. And let's be honest, we've all got our own fear factor going on, don't we? The doubts, the what-ifs, the voice that says we can't. But here's the difference Very few people tap into the faith factor, and that's the factor that changes everything In Galatians 6, 9, it says this Let us not grow weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.

Speaker 2: 15:51

That means your H-bag isn't just about hustle, it is about a harvest. That means your H bag isn't just about hustle, it is about a harvest. Your consistency, your faith, your willingness to keep showing up, that's what positions you for God's blessings. And here's what I love Faith doesn't erase the hard stuff. Faith empowers you through it. Prayer isn't just a lifeline you grab when you're sinking.

Speaker 2: 16:17

Oh no, it's a launchpad. It's where you and God strategize together. It's where he reminds you daughter, I put that dream in your heart and I'm not done with it. And don't miss this. You don't have to pray alone. Enlist people who can pray for you. Listen, I got me a friend group chat where we don't just laugh together, we live it together. We pray each other through the hard times, especially when we share the specific details to lift up to our Father. And let me tell you this there is power in knowing someone else is storming heaven's gates on your behalf. And in fact, I could pray for you. Just use the Send Sheria text feature in the podcast description and then let her rip. It comes right to my inbox. And don't forget, we also have you know this girl a 24-7 prayer line at 855-822-PRAY.

Speaker 2: 17:13

I said that wrong, 855-822-pray. You're not walking this journey alone. Listen, I've had to lean into this myself. There were nights I felt drained, unsure if I could keep pressing forward, and in those moments it wasn't my grit that carried me. On the contrary, it was God's grace. Sometimes my prayer was nothing more than Lord, give me just enough strength for today. And he always did so.

Speaker 2: 17:41

Don't think you have to do this all on your own. You may not have a spouse to push you forward, but you have a Savior who walks beside you, and he's more than enough. Ladies, that dream in your heart, it's not random, it's not an accident, and it's definitely not too big for God. If he planted it, he will provide for it. Your job, though, is to take the next step. His job is to turn those steps into a story that blesses you beyond your belief.

Speaker 2: 18:14

So I've got some questions for you to ponder before we wrap this up. Okay, I don't want to just give you strategies and stories. I want to give you space to think, to breathe, maybe even to dream again, so let me leave you with a few simple questions. Not a long list, okay. Not homework, just a gentle prompt that you can carry in your heart today. Not homework, just a gentle prompt that you can carry in your heart today. So, number one what dream and I want you to say this to yourself what dream have I set aside that God may be asking me to pick up? Two, what small step could I take this week towards that dream? And then three, who could I invite to pray with me, encourage me or hold me accountable. That's it Three questions, nothing more. But if you'll let them sit with you while folding laundry, driving to work or tucking your kids into bed, they just might spark the courage to take your next step.

Speaker 2: 19:13

Because sometimes I have found the road to your hairy, big, audacious goal doesn't start with doing. It starts with daring Daring to ask, daring to believe and daring to dream again. So as I close, ladies, here's the truth I want you to carry with you today. Being a single mom is not the thing that stops you. We have discussed that. It is the thing that proves you can. Your H-bag, your hairy, big, audacious goal, is not too big, not too bold and not too impossible when you put your faith into action. We all live with fear. That's our fear factor, but not everyone lives with faith. And it's the faith factor that makes the difference. It's what turns survival into success, setbacks into comebacks and dreams into a harvest.

Speaker 2: 20:06

So let me ask you one last time what's the next baby step you're willing to take towards that big, god-sized dream? Don't wait for the perfect moment and certainly don't let excuses keep you stuck. Take your step, ladies, because baby steps still move mountains. And remember it's a single mom thing and not the single thing that stops you. So, before I sign off, I also want to give a special shout out to our Gala Platinum sponsor. It is that time of year, that is how we fundraise and raise the money to do things like this. Talk with you, and I want to thank Crown Automotive Charities and the Hawkins Family Foundation. Thank you so much for helping us to continue to support single moms and their kids as they face their future with confidence. We couldn't do this without you. So, ladies, until next time, keep dreaming, keep stepping and keep believing. Your H-Bag is waiting. Have a wonderful week and remember it's a single mom thing, not the single thing that stops you.

Speaker 1: 21:11

Thanks for listening to it's a Single Mom Thing. I hope you enjoyed our time together. If you have more questions on how to have a relationship with Jesus or need prayer, visit us at wwwshepherdsvillagecom. Backslash prayer. For more information and resources, check out our show notes.