From Outhouse Childhood To A $20M CEO

We sit down with Jeff Abraham, CEO of Promescent, to unpack how relentless focus and smart incentives took him from a low-income childhood to building a sexual wellness brand doing over $20 million a year. We talk money, discipline, intimacy without shame, and the personal values that matter more when “more” stops changing your life. 
• growing up poor and deciding early to escape it 
• maximizing income per hour and designing your environment for opportunity 
• understanding incentives, reading people, and why results beat effort 
• coaching teams to win through conditioning and systems 
• reframing sexual wellness as normal wellness and removing shame 
• the arousal gap and why lasting longer reduces anxiety for couples 
• how Promescent’s delay spray differentiates and why trust drives expansion 
• listening to customers, tracking behavior, and removing the last buying hurdle 
• “how much is enough” and resisting lifestyle creep 
• using delayed gratification and appreciating assets to build wealth 
• five pillars: mental health, physical health, philanthropy, relationships, spirituality 
• relationship boundaries and why spirituality has to be organic 

How to Reach Jeff Abraham:

Website: www.promescent.com

Email: jeff.abraham@promescent.com

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jeffabraham111/

To Reach Jordan:

Email: Jordan@Edwards.Consulting

Youtube:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC9ejFXH1_BjdnxG4J8u93Zw

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jordan.edwards.7503

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jordanfedwards/

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jordanedwards5/

Hope you find value in this. If so please provide a 5-star and drop a review.

Complimentary Edwards Consulting Session: https://calendly.com/jordan-edwardsconsulting/30min 

Transcript

Welcome And Guest Background

SPEAKER_00 0:59

Hey, what's going on, everyone? We got a very special guest here today. We have Jeff Abraham, the CEO of Promescent, the doctor developed sexual wellness brand. He grew from $80,000 to over $20 million a year and over 5 million bottles sold, all while carrying forward the legacy of the murdered urologist whose breakthrough started it all. Jeff, thank you for coming on the hashtag ClockedIn Podcast. Now you grew up in a very low-income town in Pennsylvania and were using an outhouse until you were six. And today you're running a $20 million company. How does that happen?

SPEAKER_01 1:39

It happens because number one, you have a focus. Number two, you're relentless and you don't take no for an answer, and you set goals and you just put yourself in the right frame of mind and put yourself on the right path to achieve them. It's a little coal mining town south of Pittsburgh. It's near the West Virginia, Pennsylvania, Ohio border. It's called Cannonsburg, Pennsylvania.

SPEAKER_00 2:04

I love it. I love it. And for you, what allowed you to believe? Because there's a lot of people that are listening to this right now that might be in a job and are like, I want to do my own thing, or they might be younger and they're like, I want to have this life, but I have these limitations around me. There's no one successful around me. So how how were you growing up? Like, did you did you think this was all possible?

SPEAKER_01 2:28

I maybe was so naive. I not only thought it was possible. I knew I was going to do it. Don't ask me how, don't ask me why. I just I literally had this fantasy and I had these dreams from the time my earliest things that I was going to escape this lifestyle. I think the fact that I never had a shirt bought for me until I was, I think, 12 or 13. I was in eighth grade. My mom took me to Kmart and bought me a shirt. I remember she was taking the pins out of it. I remember thinking to myself, it's the first time anyone's worn this shirt. It was me. Because I have all older male cousins. All for whatever reason, all my cousins are male and they're all older to me. So every year you get the hand-me-downs, you know, that kind of stuff. And my mom used to make clothes too. And the one thing you never want to do is be the

Escaping Poverty Through Certainty

SPEAKER_01 3:18

one where you're making shit your mom made you. You know what I mean? Like to go to school. And I just remember thinking to myself, I love my mom and dad, but anyone who tells you you're not aware of when you're poor is lying. You're aware. And I just remember thinking, I want to give my children a very similar upbringing with loving parents, you know what I mean, who really dote on you. But I would like to have a higher standard of living. I would love to put myself in a situation to where, you know, I can eat what I want to eat, I can wear what I want to wear. If I make an all-star baseball team, which I did when I think I was 12, I think I was in seventh grade. And you go to the all-star thing, it's like the two or three best kids from each team, you know, make the all-star team. You go, everyone else has spikes, and you have tennis shoes. And you know you can't go home and ask your parents to spend $30 on a pair of spikes that you'll outgrow in six months. And everyone says, Why do you have tennis shoes? And you lie. And you say, Well, I don't like spikes. I kind of get caught, you know, in the thing. I'm just more comfortable. And the reality's different, you know. And I just I wanted my children to not have hand-me downs. I wanted them, but I didn't want to spoil them by any stretch of the imagination. I just wanted more comfort. And I didn't want anxiety. When I was in college, you know, I looked at other people with nice things and I started scrubbing floors in the cafeteria for 85 cents, 90 cents an hour. Oh wow. After it closed. I remember we'd just get completely stoned, you know, because four hours of first of all, it's like a 2,000-seat cafeteria. So you have to go put every chair on top of the table. Then you bring out the buckets and start with the mops, and you have to, you know, scrub the floor. Then you start in the area that you did first, and you start taking the chairs and putting them back down, you know. And the whole to do the whole thing, there were three of us, it takes like four hours. And I remember just getting stoned out of our mind so that you know you were just like robotic and you weren't thinking about how miserable an existence this is, spending 18 to 20 hours a week mopping floors, you know. And then I quickly decided, I was always entrepreneurial

Trading Floor Scrubbing For Opportunity

SPEAKER_01 5:33

that I wanted to get waiting and bust or uh waiting on tables and bartending jobs, but the prime jobs went to locals because if you were a college student, you left for summer break and spring break, they couldn't hire you, they couldn't depend on you because it's a resort town. So early on, like within a year, I decided I'm moving here full time, I'm not going home, I'm spending the summers here, and it gave me access, and I never scrub floors again, you know.

SPEAKER_00 5:59

I yeah. But that's just right there is just seeing the vision of like, I have this role, I don't like this role, I'm gonna have to make some changes, and am I willing to make those sacrifices to create that life that I want? And even if that's going from not washing the floors to bartending, like it's a very simple switch. You can make a lot more money though.

SPEAKER_01 6:21

You can make a lot more money. I was always about if I'm gonna work, I'm gonna maximize the amount of revenue I bring in during those hours. Sometimes when people are like, oh, I really I remember this when I was working. Oh, it's great. We're slow today. I'm like, great, fuck that. Okay. I want this place to be packed. The more people, I'm working on tips, you know, and and I want to be running the entire five, six hours and I'm bartending or waiting on tables. I literally want to be, you know, jogging and sprinting into the kitchen and get shit because I got all this stuff coming up. Because at the end of the night, I make $170 as opposed to $65, you know, and over five hours. So now, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 7:04

No, I feel that on a very real level. Like even in sales like today, I had a few meetings in the morning and they got rescheduled. So I looked at my morning and I'm like, oh, kind of opened up. So I had these sales called booked for tomorrow. Yeah. And I just called the guy and I said, Hey, if you're opening, there's an opening. Let's hop in.

SPEAKER_01 7:22

And with I do that all the time.

SPEAKER_00 7:25

Pull it forward. Pull it forward.

SPEAKER_01 7:27

If you don't ask, you don't know. And so many times people are like, Oh my god, that works perfectly because I could do something else tomorrow. Yeah, let's do it right now.

SPEAKER_00 7:34

A hundred percent. And that's where you take advantage of those opportunities because you're not you're never not busy. There's always a bunch of things to do. It's just how to get your calendar filled, or if you need that space and that time, then you take that time. But when you're going through the entrepreneurial journey, like, how'd you think about like because even with the bartending, you sit there and go, hey, I gotta get this place busy, or I'm gonna have a hundred dollar fluctuation, which is a massive amount of money at that time.

SPEAKER_01 8:02

Back then, that was like a $500 fluctuation. Now I'm 69 years old, you know? So I was always, I was never doing things that were certainly unethical or illegal, but I figured out early on how to maximize my profitability and how to reward people. Here's a prime example. I had a job in this, it was a resort, I think it was a Hyatt or something. This was back in 1976 or 77, it's a really nice place. And not to be, you know, chauvinistic or not to be, you know, ageist or anything else, but I knew if there were four ladies who played cards and came in to have lunch, and then when the bill came and it was like, okay, who had the fucking iced tea and they had the calculator, yours is 732, mine 683. You were not getting a big tip. So the hostess who was working back at that point for 240 an hour, I would say to her, do not put any group before old ladies in my section, okay? I want dudes that are on dates trying to impress their date. I want a bunch of guys who are drinking and they just got done a force of because there was a golf course there. I want those dudes in my section, okay? Yeah. Because I know at the end of the day, the fucking bill comes, it's $100, and each one of

Incentives And Reading The Room

SPEAKER_01 9:18

those guys throws 30 bucks in a thing, and I'm making a big tip because I'm making $30, you know, 30%, as opposed to somebody with a calculator, you know what I mean? Leaving freaking 37 cents and all that shit. So early on, I thought, you know, there's a difference. And most people just whatever gets sat in their section, they go, okay, I'll go wait on them. I was like, no, I want to stack my section with big tippers. And I remember, and I was really good, and I always read the room. And a guy would come in on a date, you can tell, and I'd suck up to him, make him look good in front of his date. I'd get 35% tips. And so the the general manager, he would always say, your tips average like 33% of your you know, sales. And the average waiter, waitress here is like 18%, 17%. It's not quite double, it's almost double. What's your secret? I said, number one, I know who's paying the bill, and I cater to them. You know what I mean? And I sign up to them. And I said, also, I put my time in. If there's a table where I know these people are happy and they're great and I think they're gonna be good tips, I go, then I go overboard to indulge them. They're big spenders. If someone's like, is this extra if I get this on here? Is it I go, that's not good for you or me. That that receipt is gonna be very, very low. I give them decent service, but I don't go the extra mile there. I'm putting the extra mile in to the people who are gonna be spending more money for you and have a greater tendency to tip me.

SPEAKER_00 10:52

So I mean, it you have to realize the incentives on everything. Everything better you can understand social dynamics, you can realize things where it's like that person doesn't think this is a win. So like this isn't gonna be a good situation.

SPEAKER_01 11:08

Not gonna be a good situation. Even my employees now know they don't get rewarded for effort, they get rewarded for results. Yeah, because we as a society now, you know, we give out participation trophies, and it's like, okay, you failed, but it's okay, Johnny. You were trying. That's not my parenting style. I have a wonderful son who's very successful. He and I have a great relationship. He's been loved, he's been nurtured, he's been protected. But I made it clear early on, and when I started coaching youth sports, I made it real clear to the parents. They go, No, the goal is not to win. Well, we shouldn't even keep score. I go, then this is the wrong week for your kid. Get him out of the kid. Okay, you know, if you're three years old, maybe that works. But if I'm putting in 20 hours a week as a volunteer coaching a U-12 soccer team or a high school wrestling team, we're going to try and win. We literally will play within the rules. I remember I coached my son's soccer

Coaching For Conditioning And Winning

SPEAKER_01 12:08

team, and I knew nothing about soccer, and they kind of coerced me into it because they saw how good I was at coaching other sports. They're like, we don't have enough soccer. I go, I don't have time. Then they were like, okay, come get your money. We're going to disband the team. I go, what? I go, okay, I'll do it. So I kind of went online and read about soccer, and one of my employees had played soccer. I go, you're my assistant coach, you're in charge of drills. But I remember telling the kids, and this was U10 soccer. The first two weeks we're not meeting at the soccer field. Meet me at the Edison. We it was Edison High School, Huntington Beach, at Edison Track. They go, What? I go, yeah, don't bring a soccer ball. We're not, we don't need it. Don't bring soccer cleats, bring running shoes. So for the first two weeks, three practices, you know, Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday, that run 440 sprints, 880 sprints, 100-yard ashes, half mile things. And they're like, this isn't soccer. I go, we're not going to get to soccer till I know every one of you is physically fit and capable of playing the entire game. And they were kind of complaining and everything. I go, trust me, trust me. Season started. And then all of a sudden they started buying in. They're like, oh my God. We were at one point in that year, you know, in youth soccer, you don't play halves, you play quarters.

SPEAKER_03 13:23

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 13:24

We played, I think, 17 games. And in the fourth quarter of the 17 games we played, I think we scored 31 goals and gave up four. It was insane. If we were ahead, the other team had no chance. If it was tied, they had no chance. The only way the other team could win, if they were up by one or two goals and somehow they held on. We absolutely crushed every team we played in the fourth quarter. And the kids on their own, they realized what I was doing. And so after the game, they started organizing sprints. After the game, they would line up just to rub it into the other team. We just ran you into the ground. We got a lot left. And they they bought into that. They were literally like, oh my God, this is psychological.

SPEAKER_00 14:10

Yeah. So it's one of the big things that I I coach on or I bring up a lot is called after action reviews. They do it a lot in the military. And essentially it is like, what's working, what's not working, how are we going to improve? Yeah. So your concept right there with the soccer and how they trained was this idea of like, hey, at first you might not think it's working, but then they start winning and they're like, oh, it's working. How are we going to apply this? We're going to keep sprinting. Like we're going to keep running.

SPEAKER_01 14:36

And it was, they literally took it to the next level. They go, we might see these guys in a playoffs. Sometimes you play the same team twice. We want them to know this wasn't a fluke. Okay. We enjoy this. This isn't painful, but we enjoy this. We are so much better conditioned. You we just ran you into the ground and we're still running if you're trying to catch your breath and you're getting dressed to leave. We're still running. And they did that, not me.

SPEAKER_00 15:03

I love that. So so for you, it seems like you think about systems and then how to optimize them so that there is success in winning. Correct. How because what happens to a lot of people is they get very comfortable. They're like, hey, we're making this certain amount of money, we're doing well, we're doing this. How do you keep yourself motivated and how do you keep employees motivated to continue on that journey?

SPEAKER_01 15:28

I have this very unique perspective. I've never achieved a goal I've ever had ever in my entire life. Really? I always keep it slightly above what I think is reasonable. And then if all of a sudden things go real well and I get close, I raise it. And now for my employees, their bonuses are sometimes based on that. So I never do that there. But I let them know that, hey, we achieved that. That was yesterday. Now it's today, and the most important thing is tomorrow. We have succeeded, like you said, we started at you know 80,000 a year when I took over this company, and now we're at a run rate of 20 million a year. But I'm already putting systems in place that next year has to be 20% better than this year. Oh, wow. The year after that has to be 20% better than this because the market for our products is unlimited. You know, it used to be that people used to think I have to have a sexual dysfunction if I want to have something that makes me better in bed. That whole thing is flipped on its head. Just like other aspects of life, people go, if I'm a seven out of 10, why not be an eight or nine out of 10? Seven isn't bad, but eight or nine is better. There are people that are nines that go, I want to be a 10. We have Johnny Since, who's AVN's Mill porn star of the year, 2021, 2022, openly uses our products. He endorses them. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Because it's funny if you could go to Michael Jordan or you could go to Steph Curry and say you're shooting free throws at 91.4%. Do you want to go to 91.5%? No, people go, well, that's really insignificant. That the competitors they are, they're as good as they are. They go, absolutely. If you would say to Rory McElroy or

Sexual Wellness Without Shame

SPEAKER_01 17:18

Scotty Scheffler or Tiger Woods, you're averaging, you know, 31 putts per round. How would you feel if we could make it 30.5? That half a they'd be like all over it. People that are true achievers, they want to be the best that they can be in every area of their life.

SPEAKER_00 17:36

And to get to that little distinction there is so massive.

SPEAKER_01 17:40

It's massive.

SPEAKER_00 17:41

Yes. Because it goes with the 80-20 rule, right? So you have 80% of the results from 20% of the people. And if you extrapolate that even further, then it's 96.4. And if you go even further and you start to realize that these people to get to that 9 out of 10, that's 90%, 9.9% out of 10. It becomes so hard. And then it's 9.99 out of 10. It becomes so much harder to hit that excellence and that mastery. So much additional hours and work. And most people aren't willing to put in the time. But like you said, there's a lot of things in the space and in our life that can enhance it with a slight little, it's not like you have to put in another hundred hours to get better at the activity.

SPEAKER_01 18:26

No, that's exactly right. And think about this for a second. In relationships, I'm going to say something, and a lot of people might disagree, but it's my personal view. You see how personal training in gyms are sprouting up everywhere. Pilates studios, yoga studios, regular gyms, cold plunges, infrared saunas, okay, massage therapies. Everyone gets their hair cut at a salon, you know what I mean? And or a men's upgrad upscale grooming place. Everyone wants the latest in clothing. You know what I mean? Everyone wants their beard groomed, everyone wants their skin to look good. That's all you do is pass these skin. Everyone's getting hair transplants. Everyone's like, you know, now GLPs are the rage, okay? If there wasn't a chance to have intimacy, whether it's with a person of the opposite sex or even a person with your same sex, every person on the planet would probably be 300 pounds laying there with a bag of Cheetos watching TV. A lot of what we do, a lot of that is to make yourself attractive to find the optimum partner. Why not go that extra little level to make sure you keep that partner once you attract them? If you're doing all these things meant to be more attractive and more alluring and more appealing, why not go that extra half a percent to make sure you keep them by making yourself better at intimacy, making yourself better in bed? And that's what promesant has always been about. Let's take it to the next level. Let's get rid of the shame. Let's get rid of, you know, the oh my God, I feel uncomfortable. Sexual wellness is part of wellness, and everyone's into wellness now. So why are people squeamish and a little bit hesitant to go, I want to be better sexually?

SPEAKER_00 20:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 20:06

And then we want to get to a point where we make it a spectator sport. You go, oh my God, the Russian judge, what's he holding up? It's it's between you and your partner, it's making things better with you and your partner.

SPEAKER_00 20:17

No, I I mean I think that's that's an interesting approach, Jeff, because you're absolutely right. It is a little uncomfortable when you're like, Do we get this or this? Or how do you include these things, or how do you think about these things? How do you go about this? Like, yes, and like you said, like even like a lot of the stuff, if anyone gets something, they're like, Oh, you have a problem. And it's like, like you were saying, not really. Like, you might want to improve it at all.

SPEAKER_01 20:42

And well, let me throw out something that'll blow your mind. Let's step out of sexual dysfunction or problems. Let's talk about the average healthy male and the average healthy female. The average healthy male, this comes from actual sexual medicine research centers. The actual healthy male lasts five minutes and 42 seconds of penetration and thrusting during intercourse. The average female takes 18 minutes of penetration or thrusting to achieve climax. So it's called the arousal gap. There's actually a term for it that doctors. I didn't know this. I didn't know this. No, most people don't, unless you're in the field. So that's why there's 7 trillion vibrators in the world. That's why guys stop, start, think about baseball scores, think about their grandmother naked, all these things to take down their, you know, their their eroticism or take down their feeling of, oh, oh my God, I'm turned on. So even people that are absolutely 100% normal can benefit from having something to allow them to last a little bit longer. And

The Arousal Gap Explained

SPEAKER_01 21:43

any man who says he wasn't acutely aware of, oh my God, I'm getting ready to ejaculate, my partner's not there yet, you know, because a lot of women take a little bit longer, is lying. That's something, but people just assume, oh, that's a part of life. That's I have to have a coping mechanism. I slow down, I go, oh my God, you get on top, I get on the bottom because that lets me last longer. I do this, I do that, or you know, all these different wouldn't it be nice if all of a sudden, instead of having that anxiety of going, oh my god, is she done yet? Oh my god, that you'd be going, let me switch the equation. Now my thought process is do I want to give her one or two orgasms before I finish, you know? And you give a man that control is gonna go, I like that. I like that power, you know? And it's funny because just to show you how people view this, Cosmopolitan did a study, I think it was in 2012, it was early on when I first took over the company. So it was after 2011, either 2012 or 2013. They asked a thousand men, what's the one thing you could do that would enhance the intimacy in your relationship? 78% of men said bigger penis. They ask a thousand women, what's the one thing that would allow you to have better intimacy? You know what they said? If my partner lasted longer in bed. That shows how the disparity.

SPEAKER_00 23:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 23:01

The disparity. Men like, give me a bigger penis. And women are like, no, learn how to use the one you have and learn how to last a bit longer.

SPEAKER_00 23:07

You might be better off. What is the thing you guys have that's your I it's like your primary product, right?

SPEAKER_01 23:13

Our primary product, our hero product, the thing that put us on the map and allowed us to be the company we are today is a product called promessid delay spray that allows men to last a lot longer. Okay. And there have been delay sprays on the market. This is a lidocaine-based product. But I'll tell you, here's the whole difference. In a traditional lidocaine, everybody else but us, you put it on, it sits on the surface. Lidocaine in its native form is a crystal. It's like a grain of salt. So you fly it and it sits on the surface. Make it a little motion with my hand. So it sits on the surface. Now, Dr. Ronald Gilbert, the guy who founded my company, he's a urologist, and he had a lot of people that suffered and wanted to last longer, and he didn't have any good options. You know, we can numb you and numb your partner up, that's not any good. So he developed a eutectic formula. It changes the crystalline structure of lidocaine from a solid to an oil aqueous form. When they do

Why This Delay Spray Works

SPEAKER_01 24:08

that, it it permeates the stratum corneum, so it goes underneath the surface of the skin. So the man maintains a much higher degree of surface sensitivity and it doesn't transfer to his partner.

SPEAKER_00 24:20

Interesting.

SPEAKER_01 24:21

Because there have been people that use our product, go, oh my God, I almost didn't buy this because I've been disappointed before. And I thought, oh, just another one of those. And I heard you describe this lidocaine, you know, eutectic formula. And I thought, let me give it a shot. Oh my God, it's night and day. It's like saying, I already have a car, you, but you have a Ford Taurus. This is a Ferrari. They're both cars. One goes a lot faster than the other.

SPEAKER_00 24:43

They're a lot, they're a little, little bit different. And Jeff, I just want the audience to understand what because you retired at one point at 53, right?

SPEAKER_01 24:53

Yes. At 53 years old, I had a semiconductor engineering business. I sold it and I retired. And I was like, I'm never working again. And Ron was one of my neighbors, and he was a good friend. He was my doctor, you know, and I went to see him for my yearly PSA. And he's like, hey, I developed this product and I know your history. I know the success you've had. You came out here with nothing, two suitcases, $500, and look at you now, and blah, blah, blah. Can you help me out? I go, sure. I go, what did you do? Like, what's a product? He goes, I developed a treatment for PE. I go, you developed a treatment for physical education? Because I grew up, PE was phys ed, right? He goes, no, no, no, no. And he explained it. One thing led to another. And I said, Oh, is it prescription? He says, No, it's over the counter. I'm like, what? He goes, Yeah, that's covered under an FDA monograph. So I said, give me a sample. And I tried it. I was like, oh my God, stuff actually does work, you know? And one thing led to another. I invested 100 grand in the company. He said, Can you write me a business plan? He had a partner that was a friend of his from high school

Retirement Interrupted By Tragedy

SPEAKER_01 25:53

and college. And the guy was a moron, be quite honest with you. So I wrote him a business plan. They were like, oh my God, this is genius. I said, No, it's common sense, actually, you know. And they said, okay, write us a next phase. So I wrote him the next phase of a business plan. And they were like, Oh, that's really good, but that's going to cost like 400 grand. We don't have that kind of money. I said, Hey, I'll invest another 400 grand, but you have to put it in an escort account. Do exactly what I'm telling you to do with it. And I think this company has legs. And they did, and then they asked me to take over the company. Oh, wow.

SPEAKER_03 26:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 26:26

And that's I took it over. And then unfortunately, six months later, Ron was murdered in a case of mistaken identity. Somebody had a prostate surgery by another doctor, decided he was going to kill the doctor. It had been 23 years before. So he went to the VA to get his records and he got the name. And it was close to the guy's name was Dr. Ron Gelhardt. Of course, Dr. Ron Gelhardt's not Dr. Ronald Gilbert. And they were both urologists in Orange County. And he murdered Ron without realizing it wasn't the guy that did his surgery.

SPEAKER_00 26:57

That's horrible.

SPEAKER_01 26:58

Horrible. So I've really dedicated a large portion of the last 14 years to give Ron a legacy, provide for his family, and make the company successful. That's why I mentioned him on every podcast. He's a genius. Now, we now have female arousal gels and nitric oxide supplement and vibrators, and we have all kinds of our companies robust and expanding and places. But without that first product, that was what put us on the map. That was the genius.

SPEAKER_00 27:26

And you can't see that's how when people are thinking about business, it's not, hey, let me throw 100 products at the wall. It's figure out what works and then build the brand and start to expand throughout that.

SPEAKER_01 27:37

Let me tell you something. There, I tell people this and they're going, oh my God, you're a genius. I said, No, I'm a steward. Okay. The whole genesis of this company, without that first product, people wouldn't have been buying the second product, the third product, and the fourth product because they go, I trust these guys, I like these guys. You would have been just every other schmo out there. Okay. That first product that is clearly the best product in that segment that we stand behind 100%. We feel so strongly about it. We have a 30-day full money-back guarantee. If you buy

Building Trust Then Expanding Products

SPEAKER_01 28:08

one, you get it. Because now we've had some people scam the same person over four times with a different email address, you know, different phone number, using his cousin's account. I'm like, okay, uh we'll live with that just to give people that confidence. You know what I mean? That, hey, these guys stand behind their product 100%. But that first product was insane. And, you know, when we had the second product, which was lube, we developed a line of proprietary lubes. And so I sent out an email the first hundred people to bought it. Hey, what gave you the confidence? You know, we're known for a delay spray to buy these lubes. And it was like the same person wrote each one with slightly different wording. Well, it's on this site, we know it's a quality product. You need to stand behind it.

SPEAKER_00 28:49

Oh, wow.

SPEAKER_01 28:50

Yeah. And then I remember that we developed another gel, which is good at female arousal gel. Then I remember we went to Vitaflux, these supplements to increase blood flow. It's good for men and women, increases libido, increases, you know, orgasm and everything. And I remember we developed, everyone said, Oh my God, this is a bridge too far. Those are supplements. Those aren't, you know, you're known for it. I said, trust me, people don't sit there and make that. They're like, these guys have quality products. That product took off and became our second best selling product almost immediately.

SPEAKER_00 29:19

Once you have the trust, we have the trust.

SPEAKER_01 29:22

And then we were we were selling other people's vibrators because everyone came to us because we were this upstart company that people go, oh my god, they love, they're growing, they're doing a lot through their website. So we started doing you know, some other people's vibrators. Then I said, you know, we're gonna take these to the next level, develop some of our own. People go, no, that's an electronic device.

SPEAKER_00 29:47

Yeah. No, I mean the more in-house stuff, you have more control, you have access.

SPEAKER_01 29:51

And I said, I want to have, and our vibrators are the same quality as once itself for two, three times as much. And people go, how can you do that? I go, we have very low margin on those because I look at it as brand building. You know, when you have a business, every single product doesn't have to be this massive windfall financially. Because I know my own behavior, you know, I'm very open that I use vibrators, especially at my age, on my partners a lot, you know, because you know, your refractory time, which means the time you're ready to have sex again after you ejaculate. When you're 18 or 20 or 25, it's like five minutes, okay? Then you're in your 20s and 30s, it's like 20 minutes, 30 minutes. Then you're in your 40s, it's like an hour. Then you're in your 50s, it's like, okay, one tonight, one tomorrow morning. I'm 69, okay. It's like once, you know, I have an intimate encounter with a partner. I literally need a night's sleep, a workout, three meals, you know what I mean? 48 hours, I'm ready to go next time. So I really love the idea of you know, some AIDS and, you know, like vibrators and stuff. And we they took off immediately and we did really, really well with them. And it's just crazy. Some of the products it'll blow you away. We have another product that's doing really, really well. It's a it's called Go Solo. It's a mental masturbation cream. Because one of the fastest growing areas in sexual wellness is male masturbation. It's always been tons of vibrators for female masturbation and stuff. But the fastest growing segment right now is male masturbatory products. You know, one of the things that it's disturbing in our society, think about this, and it was exacerbated during COVID. One of the things that's really frightening is a lot of people want to work remote. Very few people want to go to the office. Everybody's focused. I want to work remote. I want to work remote. They don't even go shopping. Amazon Prime every other day is bringing your toothpaste, your deodorant, your clothing, everything. They don't even go out for meals anymore or groceries. They have, you know, all the grocery chains deliver. And then, you know, DoorDash and Uber Eats. It's to the point where a lot of young people, urologists and therapists, will tell you this. They don't even leave the house. They don't even date. They have all these masturbatory products. And they were seeing a lot of men who had blistering and a lot of men who had desensitation of their penile area because they were masturbating and they weren't using lubrication. Because it's almost like a shameful thing. And if I sit back and I go, oh my God, I'm planning this session out, that means I'm a loser, you know. So it's like, let me hurry up and get this done. It's like, no, no, no, no, no, you can't do that because you'll literally develop some issues. So we developed this product called Go Solo, and it's a big seller. And we immediately knew when we developed it that we were going to start marketing initially to the men who had bought masturbation devices from us. And it just took off from there. It's got great reviews. So it's selling well on Amazon, it's selling well on our website.

SPEAKER_00 33:01

So as you have people who are interested in certain products or segments, you can keep pushing to them because they'll keep purchasing more and more.

SPEAKER_01 33:09

One of the things we do is we listen to our customers. Sometimes people go, Oh my God, how'd you figure out that was going to be a good product? I go talking to my customers. They're like, What? I go, one of the reasons we keep a robust website, we're one of the few people that do everyone else. Retail and Amazon. I go, we don't get an idea of who's buying. When you're on Amazon, you know nothing. All you know is it's selling in a particular region. They don't give you any information whatsoever. Yeah. You have absolutely no idea. It's just Target ordered, you know, 8,000 more units, you know, whatever. So it's something that on our website, I can track customer behavior. I see they come and buy a 20 spray sample size. Then they come back and buy a 60 spray large size. Okay, they love the product. Then they'd buy that for four months in a row. Then they go, let me try some Vitaflux. Let me try some loot. What else am I buying? They have here. And then we'll see times where someone comes and buys seven products, like literally one out of every category we have. And that just lets me know. So I reach out to a lot of our repeat customers, go, what other areas do you think we could be of assistance? And they will tell me, Oh, I'd love to have this, I'd love to have that. Then when I see a trend and that's becoming prevalent, then we go into that area.

SPEAKER_00 34:28

Yeah. So as you understand them better, then you get to see that.

SPEAKER_01 34:31

One of the things I think people laugh that I will tell you is some people say to me sometimes, how many new products are you going to add this year? And I go, somewhere between zero and six. What what kind of theory is that? You know, what kind of like, you know, like you need to say three, four, five. I said, let me tell you something. One of the reasons we've been successful is we will not introduce a product unless we know it's as good or better than everything else in that category. That's our criteria. Okay. So if I were to say I'm going to have three product launches this year, I'm going to put pressure on myself to introduce at least one, two, or even possibly three ineffective products that aren't meet that standard. Now we can't, the reason I say one to six, we don't have the bandwidth to literally add more than five or six. So we'll add products and we're always looking and always working and always trying to develop new products. But unless I know that they are as good or better than everything else in that space, we will not introduce that product. Because I know when people buy our products and I say, What gave you the confidence? And they say if it's on this site, we know it's top quality. There are people that literally, if we introduce a product and it's in a category, they're using a product, they immediately drop that other product and buy from us. I'll get everything here. I know I trust them. The first time they buy something, they go, that was bullshit. We're not going to get have that trust anymore. So we're going to violate that trust.

SPEAKER_00 35:56

Yeah, and if you have the constraints, then it forces you to make sure that it's the best of the best. That's right. One of the things I want to switch over to real quick is I know one of your concepts is how much is enough? Like when we talk about like finances, when we talk about business, when we talk about all of it, how do you think about how much is enough in life? Because I know there's the constant obsession of get more and more and more.

SPEAKER_01 36:19

I'm a little wiser and a little more intelligent at this point than I was earlier. And when the hourglass starts running low on sand, which I am at my age, you start realizing another dollar, an extra hundred, an extra million, an extra 10 million means absolutely nothing. I have enough money to live comfortably for the rest of my life. The most important thing for me is the time with my loved ones, people that I love, and developing additional people. It doesn't mean romantic love, friends, family, you know, co-workers, the whole thing. So the real focus needs to be on enrichment and wellness and love. Now, don't get me wrong. If you have anxiety because you can't pay your bills and you can't eat correctly,

How Much Money Is Enough

SPEAKER_01 37:03

and you literally you have a car that's broken down, you can't pay to get it fixed, you need to make more money.

SPEAKER_03 37:08

Okay, to cover level.

SPEAKER_01 37:11

But I have neighbors that literally are worth $50 million. Go, man, my life would be complete if I was worth $100. Oh my God, that'd be so much better. I have neighbors that literally are worth $100 million. If I could get up to $250 a court, oh my God. I have people that are worth half a billion go, if I could become a billionaire. And I just look at them and go, what the fuck is wrong with you? Okay. You can't spend the money you have right now. Instead of wishing for something that has no material effect on your life, and when you die, 40% of it's going to the federal government right off the bat. Your priorities are as few. Now, when you're 20 or 30, not that you should aspire to be a billionaire, but you should say, I want to make as much as I can as quickly as I possible, ethically. Don't cut corners and don't do anything illegal or unethical. So that you get to a certain point in your life and you're working because you want to, not because you have to. I have so many people that are so miserable in their job that they feel trapped. You know, I hate my job. I hate it when I got to deal with this person. My boss is a prick, but hey, I got next month's mortgage due, you know, and I have to do this. I tell people, I've been fortunate enough at a very young age that I didn't have that pressure. I didn't have that. I made myself starting with nothing, to where I never had to work another day in my life. I work now because I want to and I enjoy it. I'm extremely creative. I also realize that I'm not that well ego formed that if I'm not good at something, then I'm like, why am I here? You know, that kind of thing. So I do want to stay involved because I get a good feeling out of creating something, out of seeing a niche and going, I think I can develop a product that fits that particular need, and then doing it. But so many people get caught up in their life will be so much better if they could have, you know, when this happens, if this occurs. Yeah, yeah. It's absurd. It's absurd. I have a neighbor that has 13 cars, and he said to me one day, Do you only have one car? And I'm like, Yeah. He goes, Why? I said, Because until you teach me how to drive two at the same time, why would I need more than one? He started laughing, right? And he said, You got a good point there. I said, I know how much I pay to register my car. I know how much insurance costs, and I know how much it depreciates every year. Why would I want to do that times 13? Okay. I said, to me, a car, now don't get me wrong, having a nice car is not wrong with that. I do have a nice car. So electric Mercedes and EQS 580. But to have a second, third, fourth, fifth car, I have I it boggles my mind. I'd rather put that money in stocks and bonds and things that appreciate, not depreciate.

SPEAKER_00 39:44

Cars are one of the the honestly, they're literally, and if anyone's with me is thinking financially, like cars are literally one of the biggest things that cause people financial stress.

SPEAKER_01 39:54

You want to hear something that will blow your mind. I never had a car in my name purchased until I was 34 years old. Because I got out of college and I specifically got a job with a company car. Because I knew now this shows how old I am. It would save me about $240 a month in a car payment. It would save me $80 a month in insurance and it wouldn't depreciate. So I had this company car. And so I started banking $400 a month because I figured that's how much it was saving me, not having a car. So at the end of a year, two years, I bought a condo in Huntington Beach, California, a play called the Sea Spray Condo Complex. And I bought it for $88. Don't ask me why I'm a freak with numbers. I bought it for $88,200. Okay. And I rented it out. And back then they had straight line depreciation. So the following year it was 10 years. I got to take $8,800 off of my taxes. And two years later, I saved up another, you know,

The Company Car Real Estate Plan

SPEAKER_01 40:53

$10,000. I bought another one, same place, the Sea Spray Condo Complex, and I paid $89 for that one. And one thing led to another. A year later, because I got this massive income return, I bought another, and then I bought a fourth one. So I had four condos in the same complex. The most expensive one I paid $92. The cheapest one I paid $88,2. I kept them for $14 years. They were, I put them on 15-year mortgages because I knew rents would take care of it. I sold one when my son was born, and I sold it for $240,000 and used that now payment on my home. I bought my home for $340,000, lived in it for 11 years, and sold it for $1.2 million. I took two of the other condos, I sold those, and bought two homes in Colorado Springs that I own free and clear now. And I I bought those for $111 a piece and they're worth $400 now. And they give me, I think, $4,000 a month in income. Oh wow. And the fourth one I sold and bought four homes in Dallas, Texas. And I bought those for the in the 90 range and they're worth 300 grand now.

SPEAKER_00 42:07

Oh my God.

SPEAKER_01 42:08

I also bought my business or started my business with seed money from one of those condos. So I tell people not having a company car or not having a car, having a company car from ages 22 to 34 saved me, well, allowed me to buy four condos. I bought those four condos because where else can you control 320,000 for $40,000? And depreciating. And then I got up to maximum, what I thought was maximum appreciation. I sold them, then turned that into four condos, or excuse me, four homes in Texas that are now worth $2 million. So that one $8,000 investment in a condo, that went up to $250. I sold it, then took that $250 and turned it into $2 million. My two properties in Colorado are worth, you know, roughly $1.1 million. That was $16,000, you know. And business netted me $15 million. So $400 a month for 12 years, I turned into about $27 million. Just by nothing.

SPEAKER_00 43:10

That's incredible.

SPEAKER_01 43:11

Is that insane? That's incredible. When I started making really good money, people say to me, Why don't you have a little Mercedes or a Jaguar or this or that?

SPEAKER_00 43:20

No, no, no.

SPEAKER_01 43:21

I go, I have a company car. I don't need it. They go, Your company car is a Buick Skywalker. It gets me where I want to go. And they're like, What? And I said, I I buy stuff that appreciates. To this day, I still, even now, I've only ever bought one new car.

SPEAKER_00 43:36

Because they only see the, they only see the vis they don't see the bigger vision of like what you're trying to do. Everyone wants the short term.

SPEAKER_01 43:43

I'm not about instant gratification. I've always said, ditch instant gratification. Keep your eye on the prize long term because everything else will take care of itself in a very short period of time. But if you're if you have instant gratification, you'll never get out of that hole. You'll be like a hamster on a wheel running and never.

SPEAKER_00 44:02

It's really brutal. And I see it with a lot of people. So Jeff, I know we could go for a long time, but we got to get to the five pillars really quick. Um just to humanize you. So people who don't sit there and go, oh my God, Jeff's incredible. How do you do all this? So the five pillars are mental health, physical health, community service philanthropy, relationships, and spirituality. So I ask all of my guests this. So, Jeff, for you, what's your mental health like today on a one to 10? How do you feel? And if it's on the higher end, maybe we give some tips and tricks for the audience. If it's on the lower end, we talk about it.

SPEAKER_01 44:39

I'll say my mental health right now is between seven and a half or eight. It would be an 11, except I have to have another neck fusion surgery. I had a triple neck fusion surgery. And the level below it, because of the pressure and the weight of the triple fusion below it, I have to have it done. And I'm going to Germany to have it because they have some advanced surgical. Oh my God. A little apprehension there. I got to tell you, I have lupus, I have diabetes, I've had a triple neck fusion, a double back fusion, and I have pins in my

Five Pillars For A Good Life

SPEAKER_01 45:08

shoulder and in my big toe on my left foot. So I haven't been blessed with good health. And I never use an excuse. I persevere. I just blow through it and get done what I need to be done. My mental health, the reason is so high, even though I have all this nonsense that I deal with. I have a son who I adore. I absolutely adore. He's the best son you could ever have. And I have a granddaughter now that, oh my God, I lose my mind over. I love her. And those two things are the most important thing in the world to me, hands down. My son and my granddaughter. They're they're the center of my universe. They're my north star. Anytime I feel like, man, my neck's killing me, but I go, I gotta go see Sophia and Nick. And then I don't have a care in the world when I'm with them.

SPEAKER_00 45:52

I love that. I love that. So it's just keeping the main thing, the main thing.

SPEAKER_01 45:56

Keeping the main thing, the main thing. Keep your eye on. You don't focus on what's negative in your life. Focus on what's positive in your life while addressing what's negative. Don't obsess on it, but focus to get it taken care of to remove it.

SPEAKER_00 46:09

100%. And then physical health on a one to set. How are you feeling about that?

SPEAKER_01 46:14

It's about a five. You know, the aging is not for the faint of heart. Aging isn't for sissy, even when you're healthy, let alone having lupus, diabetes, neck surgery, back surgery, foot surgery. But you only have one life to live. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 46:35

So how do you increase that? What do you do every morning?

SPEAKER_01 46:39

I walk between seven and ten miles every single morning. I did this morning. I never miss. I took a private Pilates class, worked out. So to me, it's never a question, am I going to work out tomorrow? It's when do I put it in? That's an obsession. Okay. Every single day I'm going to work out. Where am I going to fit it in? And before I figured it out, and it's it doesn't vary. The only time I haven't worked out in the last 30 years or recovering from one of my surgeries where they physically say you're not allowed to work out. And my employees and my friends, and or from in a relationship, everyone will tell you, you're cranky when you don't get to work out. I go, hell yeah, because I'm used to it. It's it's the endorphin, it's part of the process, it's part of my process, and it's crucial to me to do that.

SPEAKER_00 47:23

100%. And then the third is community service and philanthropy. How does that show up in your life? Do you guys ever think about in the community donating anything along those lines?

SPEAKER_01 47:34

Oh, absolutely. I was a big brother for seven years before my son was born. Oh, wow. I still give my time, probably on a once-a-year basis because I was very successful at it. So I don't have time to do it on a full-time basis like I did back then, meaning like 10 hours a week. But every well, once a year they'll call me and go, we have a batch of new big brothers. Can you come speak to them for an hour or two? And I go to the center and I tell them, do not be a Disneyland dad, do not be someone that tries to buy affection. If you really want to be a good big brother, what you want to do is help coach their sports teams, be active in their life, have an open line of communication, go to the park together, kick a soccer ball. If all you're going to do is join the Big Brother program to go, I can give you things that you can't afford, then just give money to charity and don't waste your time. It's most important to establish that relationship. I had the same big brother for

Mentorship And The Ticket Trading Lesson

SPEAKER_01 48:28

all seven years I was there, and he's very successful right now. He will laugh. And here's an example of what things I taught him. We got free tickets to an angel game. The big brothers called me. You guys are both sports oriented. Do you want to go to a game? I said, yeah. So we go to this game and I pick up the tickets. It will call Jeff Abraham to the Big Brothers, Big Sisters. Okay, great. They give me tickets. It was in the center field of the very last row. I looked, I go, these are tickets I couldn't sell. So they just want a tax write-up. They give them away. I said, I didn't drive all the way here to sit there. So I said to my little brother, I said, here's what we're going to do. I said, I'm going to give you like $20. I'm going to give you a five, put it in your left pocket, five ones, put it in this pocket over here. Here's a $10 bill, put it in this pocket. I want you to go out and say, hey, my friend and I need some tickets, blah, blah, blah. And I'm going to go sell these two. The face value on the two tickets I had was six bucks a piece. That's how bad the tickets were. So $12. I think I sold them for $7 for both. He comes over, he had three tickets. I go, how'd you get three? He goes, somebody just said, hey, I got three. You can have all three for $12. I go, these are decent. I go, but I still don't want to sit in it, but they're really decent seats. We're improving. Yeah, we're improving. So I gave him more money, same thing. But you know, you don't want to pull out a watt, you have less negotiating power. Put a five here, the tens here, all the ones go here. So I sold the three tickets that he had bought for seven dollars for 20. Oh, wow. I said, so we did this for like a half hour. We probably traded probably 15 to 16 different tickets or sets of tickets, okay? So we we ended up with two tickets that were about eight rows up from the third baseline. Oh wow. Angels, okay. And then I he gave me all the money back, and I realized we had $78 more than we started with, plus those two really good tickets. So during the evening, I bought him, you know, a Dodger dog. I bought him one of those ice creams that's in a glass, you know, batting helmet, you know, and I bought him this, you know, shirt, this baseball shirt and everything, but I took it out of the $78. So at the end of the night, I went to drop him off. He was like nine or 10 years old. And I said, hey, man, he goes, Oh, that was so much fun. Oh my God, thank you. I said, Hey, and I handed him, I'll never forget this, $42. He goes, What's this? I said, It's our profitability from tonight. And he goes, What? I said, You know the two tickets we had. I said, we basically traded into them. Plus, we made $78. Even after your Dodger dog and your hot fudge Sunday and your shirt, this is what's left. I said, This is yours. He was blown away. Do you know to this day, he tells people, that's the first time in his life that he ever realized that if someone hands you a shit sandwich, you don't have to sit there and take a bite, that you can go, no, no, no, no, no. You can trade that shit sandwich into a prime rib or a wagu steak. If you he said, My whole life, my mom was on public assistance, and it was like, put your hand out and take what you can get. He said, That is the first time, and he's a regional manager for a major eyewear company now. That's awesome. He said that opened up his mind to wait a second, you don't have to accept a lesser lot in life. You can be smart, you can be practical, you can, you know, position yourself to not accept a lesser lot in life. You know, that was one of the most powerful things that it taught me that everyone isn't wired how I am. I figured that shit out on my own when even I was that age, okay? But I've always been a good mentor. And teaching people at my son's wedding, his best man gave a speech all about his relationship with my son and everything, and then turned around and went, pointed right at me. He goes, Look right there. Nick is the man he is because of him. And he goes, Every one of us, look at this table, every one of us, that's our second father. We call him if we didn't know what class to take. We call him about relationships, we call him about jobs because he loves his son and he's always there, he's always available. So I've always been a natural mentor. You know, I had a lot of good people to look up to, not from a financial perspective, not from a success standpoint, but my uncles and my dad were all good people, and they all were really, really living the right way.

SPEAKER_00 52:48

And yeah, and you can tell when people are doing that. That's a really powerful story because that gets you realizing that like the things you have in life don't have to be the things that way always, and you can make the changes to We live in a country that where if you're born poor, you don't have to die poor.

SPEAKER_01 53:04

There are countries in the world where if you're born poor, you die poor, okay? Absolutely. This is not one of them. Yeah, no, I mean if you look at my story, I'm not more intelligent than anyone else, okay? I I'm gonna full accountability here. My high school GPA was 2.4, my college GPA was 2.27. Okay. Oh my gosh. I had already realized I don't need anything. That doesn't matter. Okay. I remember that I was in an art history class and I'm sitting there and looking around, going, do I really think that at some point in my life I'm gonna be getting a mortgage? And the guy's gonna go, shows you how long ago. The guy's gonna go, okay, your mortgage rate is 10.2%. Wait, he's gonna flash a painting and go, if you can name the the painter and the error, it'll be 9.8. I'll give you. No, of course not. All my goal taking that class was to get either a D plus or a C minus, just to get those credits out of the way. And I wanted to focus. The class that I excelled in, I got an A plus, was Nazi rhetoric. Not because I wanted to be a Nazi, not because I was fascinated by Nazis. You know what it was? Joseph Goebbels, you've heard of him. He was Hitler's propaganda minister. He was the first guy that figured out if you had a nation or you had a company or you had this group of people, there's key opinion leaders. So say you have 400 people in your company. You have marketing, you have sales, you have manufacturing, and you have whatever. If you get the key opinion leader in each one of those to buy in, everyone else follows because they look up to him. So he was the guy that developed the theory that go for the key opinion leaders. You don't have to get every single person in a group, you get the one person. And I was I was fascinated by that.

SPEAKER_00 54:49

That's why that's why the group dynamic works. Like exactly why you present to a group and then you come in as a speaker, you already have the trust of everyone, and that's why speaking from the audience always lands well because you're there and it's trusted.

SPEAKER_01 55:04

And I knew that. I remember people going, Oh my god, you get all C's and C pluses and you know C minuses, and you get an A plus. I go, I was fascinated because I go, This is life shit here. This is stuff that I can use in my life. So I've always been that way. If the stuff I can use, I remember first time in 10th grade, it was Mr. Lucas, he was my LGBT teacher, and he puts this like uh equation on the board. I'm like, raise my hand and go, excuse me, there's letters in there. Why are letters in there? Oh, well, this is an algebraic equation. I go, how's that practical to my life? And he goes, Well, this particular equation, you know, the E equals this. So if you if you know the the the A wall number A, B, and C, you can figure out wall number E without E or D without even measuring it by you know using this formula. I said, I don't need that. I'm never gonna be practical in my life. He's on the I said, I'm a businessman. I have people build stuff for me. I go make do you know he took me out in the hall and paddled me for being a smart ass?

SPEAKER_00 56:10

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_01 56:11

Well, back when I was growing up, yeah, you were you got paddled in school. Absolutely. Now you'd be in jail, okay? But he swatted me hard and for being a smart ass. I wasn't being a smart ass. I was 100% serious.

SPEAKER_00 56:24

I literally like what ends up happening is the identity that we carry. So you walk around like I'm a business guy. I everything goes through that lens of like yes, no. Yeah, yes.

SPEAKER_01 56:35

Think about this for a second. When I was 10, 12 years old, all my friends were dreaming about being on the cover of Sports Illustrated scoring a touchdown, the Super Bowl, being on People Magazine's 100 sexiest people, being a movie star, you know, being on a TV sitcom. I literally was dreaming about being a businessman because I looked in the mirror, I go, I don't think, you know, being a male models in my future. I was a reasonable athlete, but certainly no pro athlete. I knew at an early age my strength is my ability to read the room, figure things out, and to make money.

SPEAKER_00 57:10

Absolutely. Absolutely.

SPEAKER_01 57:12

From the time I was young.

SPEAKER_00 57:14

I love that. So we have two more areas: relationships and spirituality. So relationship on a one to ten, how does that show up for you?

SPEAKER_01 57:23

Right now, I'm in between relationships because I'm anxious to have another one, but I'm really happy because I'm at a point in my life, I want to be in a relationship, but I'd rather be alone than being the wrong relationship. Okay, that's the most important thing. There's no more lonely feeling than being in a relationship going, I'm not happy, I don't respect this person, I don't like this person. So it's important to me when your time is limited to not waste time, you know, and to be that's extremely important. So I'm very happy right now because I've always had good relationships and literally good friends with almost everyone I've ever had a relationship with. You know, sometimes they run their course, that doesn't mean anyone did anything wrong. Yeah, you know, it's you know, but you go in honestly and you're up front, and I've never cheated on anyone. I've never I don't do that. That's just not my thing. Yeah, this will be good for as long as it lasts, hopefully it'll last forever. If it doesn't, we'll both be up front, we'll part as friends. And that's the way that I want

Relationships Spirituality And Boundaries

SPEAKER_01 58:18

to live my life, and that's why I think I'm really on good terms with everybody. The spirituality question is very interesting because I'll tie it back into relationships too. So I am, I wouldn't say agnostic, I'm a spiritual person in general because through the birth of my son and now my granddaughter, life is so perfect and so precious. I just think, my God, is there anything else here? But I'm not one of these people that Jesus Christ is my savior. I was born again. I tell people, and again, I'm not trying to win a popularity contest, I'm being honest. When someone says to me, I was born again, you need to be born again, I go, You had to be. You fucked it up so bad the first time. You had to be reborn. I'm doing a pretty good job with this one, so I'm gonna roll with it. You know what I mean? I'm open if I find more higher power. That would certainly, I think, but it have to be something that would happen organically. I'm not one of these people that because I turn 69, I'm afraid of dying, and I better check that box just in case I get there to check in. You know what I mean? You don't want to do religion out of fear, you don't want to become spiritual, you want it to be out of strength. Because I find people with shelf religion. Things are going bad, I better grab that off the shelf. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_00 59:22

But it that's the same thing with relationships. You want to go into a relationship with the strength, not the weed. Yeah, like I need to.

SPEAKER_01 59:29

Back to back. I meet a gal out hiking, okay? And we start talking. She stopped me. She goes, I've seen you out here three days in a row. I don't know how to refer to you, but I call you as I don't know where he's going, but he's getting there in a hurry because you're and I start laughing. I go, I'm really busy, blah, blah, blah. So we start talking and we walk for a while. I slowed down. You know what I mean? And we walked. Then I asked her to go to dinner because she's pretty fit, pretty attractive gal, you know. I say, Do you want to go to dinner? Yeah, we'll go to dinner. So we went to dinner and we sit down and we're chatting, and she says, I gotta tell you something. I said, What? She goes, I'm gonna send you a link and I want you to listen to it and everything. And she goes, It's very important to me that I have a person who's spiritual has a relationship with God. I'm like, What? She goes, Yeah. And she goes, I'm gonna send you a link. I go, don't bother. She goes, what? I said, let me tell you something. I'm a firm believer. We haven't even really started dating. We went to dinner, we met out hiking. Okay. I have a real issue. If I'm dating someone, they try to go, okay, now I'm going to change your behavior. I've never had anyone change my behavior before we even started dating. I said, religion and spirituality is a very personal thing to me. I would not want to say to you, you know, oh my God, you're overly spiritual. You need to dial that back. Because to me, that's your right. I said, for you to bring that up to me and say, I need to listen to something. I listen to things that I'm curious about and to have an assignment, you know what I mean? I go, listen, I go, we'll enjoy dinner and then both be on our own merry way, but this ain't happening. Oh, no, no. I don't I go, no, no, no, no. You already have this control issue, okay? And I go, that's just not happening. That's a very personal thing to me. I want it to happen. I want it to happen organically, but if it doesn't, I'm very comfortable. I'm not force-feeding anything. And I'm certainly not going to have someone try to jam it down my throat, someone I just met, you know.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:23

Yeah, no, I hear you. I mean, it's it's a meeting people where they're at kind of thing. It's not have to go one way or another way, but it's really understanding all of it and realizing that the more we open up things, and because some people, I have a couple buddies like that that are like, you must. And I'm like, it's okay, it's okay.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:43

But you know, to me, I know that I'd be much more receptive to a person who goes, you know, I really like this person, and I think he's got potential. I want to develop a relationship, and maybe through dating, and he'll see what it does for my life, and then he'll come towards it. You know what I mean? As opposed to going, hey, before we even go out, I need you to start your relationship. What?

SPEAKER_00 1:02:07

I mean, I understand. So there's two sides to it, right? Like there's the one side of, hey, like you want to have kids, you want to get married, you want to go all that. Like, it's probably something you should put out there in the beginning if you're really looking for a serious partner.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:20

I'm 54, I'm 59. We ain't having first of all, I I've been snipped. It's not biologically possible. Plus, she's way past menopause.

SPEAKER_00 1:02:28

No, no, no, no. But I'm just saying, if you're like looking for a serious partner, I get that. Oh no, absolutely. But if you're just like, hey, we're hanging out, we'll see what happens, kind of thing.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:37

Like I literally, the first time I saw her without a floppy hat on in her hiking stuff was right there at dinner, you know?

SPEAKER_00 1:02:44

Yeah, that's a little, it could be a little early for something of that nature. Yeah, why don't we start taping and you show me along? But that's everything, like you know what I mean. That's how long does it take to build a relationship with someone to where you start sharing as you have more rapport with them, your relational emotions can go further and you can have deeper conversations.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:06

Absolutely, I agree a hundred percent.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:08

That's why we do a prep call, like that's why we do the secondary. So then by the time the call is happening, you're like, Oh, I know Jordan, it's all good. We'll have the conversation. Because when that doesn't happen, and that's this is for anyone. That's why people don't like they don't want to be sold right away. They don't want to be like, they want to know each other, they want to know people.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:25

So, like they want to build up some trust, they want to build up a reference point that hey, this person's viable.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:31

Yes, exactly. So it just takes time, but I'm relating it to sales, kind of relating it to everything. But either way, Jeff, where can people learn more about you? Where can they learn more about what you're doing, the company, everything?

SPEAKER_01 1:03:45

You can learn a lot about me. You go to our website, www.promessit, P-R-O-M-E-S-C-E-N-T.com, www.promessen.com. You can email me. I'll give you my email address. It's Jeff.abraham, like Abraham Lincoln at promess it, P-R-O-M-E-S-C-E-N-T.com. I answer every single email that I get. I've had people, I've been on podcasts, they'll and they'll go, oh my God, you actually answer this. I go, you think I give out my freaking email address and not respond? How stupid would that be? You know? I go, I'm curious as to how people find us. I want feedback, how I come across. I want feedback on our products. I want feedback on, you know, how I present myself. I'd also like feedback on why you agree or

Where To Find Jeff And Closing

SPEAKER_01 1:04:33

disagree with some of the things that I'm always open to adjust my views. I'm always open to say, hey, maybe if I took a different tone, it would be just like the person tried to cram the religion down my throat on a first date. Like, like I said, if it would have been, hey, let me develop some rapport with this guy. And if we start vibing and we start dating, and then he sees what this does for my life, he may come to me and say, you know, I'd really like to learn more about this. I think it's really something positive in your life. But before I have any idea, don't go, you need to do this. I'm sending you a link and you need to study it. Like, what? Like, yeah, no, I hear that.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:12

Back in school, you know? It's a little bit too much. It's a little bit too much. But yeah, I'll put on it.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:17

I encourage people to reach out. If you go to our site and you go, I think this is the right product, I'm not sure, email me. I'll it will be me. I will respond to you. And I've had people go, is this actually you or is this someone answering your emails? I go, here's my cell number, call it, I'll answer, you know, and they'll go, Oh my God. I I'm a firm believer that one of the things that real good CEOs do is they're in touch with their customers. And they they get a feeling of what drives people. And I always say to all my employees, anytime we have any customer interactions, I want you to find out how they found us. Because whatever's working, I want to do more of. I also tell them always ask what was the last hurdle that you had to overcome before you purchased a product. They go, Why are you so fixated on that? I go, think about it. Everyone's like, I am, I don't know. I go, think about it. If we can determine what's the last hurdle they had to overcome before they bought the product, and in this case, this happens a lot. Something becomes prevalent, and it's then we need to work on getting rid of that.

SPEAKER_03 1:06:25

Okay. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:26

Because we heard from a lot of people, oh, that the last hurdle was I had tried a pro delay spray before it left me numb, my partner numb. And and I'm like, wait a second, we had this eutectic formula, and we went back and we're so used to you knowing it that we had mentioned it, but it wasn't quite emphasized. So we went back and on every single page we made it really clear this does not transfer. You will not become completely numb. Your partner will not become numb. And the only way because sometimes you get you don't see the forest from the trees, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_00 1:07:02

Yeah, especially when when you're in it, it's so hard. So you got to lift your head up sometimes.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:06

You gotta lift your head up. Somebody that just came to our site once or twice can give me insights. I see my site every single day, okay? And I'm like, whoa, I didn't realize that. This happened one time. I was on a plane. I was flying from Orange County back to my home in Summerlin when my home was being built. And some guy sits next to me. He was a chiropractor from Utah. I'll never forget this. He goes, Hey, what's up? I got on a whole lot, I'm building a home here, you know. Because he said, Are you going back to home or do you live here? And I go, actually both. I go, I'm building a home here. And he goes, What do you do? I said, I'm the CEO of a medical company. He goes, Oh, I'm a chiropractor. I go, Really? Because what's the name of your company? I go, Promessin. And he had this weird look. And I go, it's a company involved in sexual wellness and everything. He's like, Yeah. And I go, Oh, does that kind of offensive? He goes, No. And I go, what? He goes, I've been to your website. And I go, what? And he goes, I've been to your website. I said, Oh, have you used our products? He goes, no. I go, what brought you the website? He goes, My wife takes a little longer than I do to climax it. And he goes, I was looking for something. I go, then why'd you come to the website and not buy a product? He goes, I was afraid it might transfer. I was like, what? He goes, yeah. Like, oh my God, dude. I go, give me your name and number right now. I'll send you a sample. So I did. I sent him a sample. And uh it's the craziest thing. I went back the next day and I called everyone in my office and I said, go back to our website. This is when it really started. And every single page, make sure it's apparent. Here's a guy that came to the website and literally left without knowing what our biggest strength was. We're so caught up in our own world. It's in there, but it's not emphasized enough.

SPEAKER_00 1:08:40

And and that brings up a very good point for everyone listening right now. I want you guys to think about what is your biggest strength and that you're not sharing with the world.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:49

That's right.

SPEAKER_00 1:08:49

I think that's uh that leaves us at a good point, Jeff. Really appreciate the time. Play to your strengths. Absolutely.