Hi this is Victoria of theunleashedheart.com and you're listening to grieving voices, a podcast for hurting hearts who desire to be heard. Or anyone who wants to learn how to better support loved ones experiencing loss. As a 30 plus year graver in advanced Grief Recovery methods specialist. I know how badly the conversation around grief needs to change. Through this podcast, I aim to educate grievers and non grievers alike spread hope and inspire compassion towards those hurting. Lastly, by providing my heart with yours and this platform, Grievers had the opportunity to share their wisdom and stories of loss and resiliency. How about we talk about grief, like we talked about the weather? Let's get started. Hey there, and welcome to grieving voices. Thank you for tuning in today, tonight, this morning whatever time it is where you are. Today's episode is takeaways and reflections episode from Episode 92 with Phoebe Leona, I'm only grieving Fridays. And I really contemplated that title for that episode. Only because it's not a main focus of what we talked about. It doesn't fully embody the areas of grief that we talked about. But I found it interesting that she had created this pact for herself. And it was one of those little pieces of our conversation that struck me. And so that's why I decided to title that episode. I'm only grieving Fridays. Because imagine if we could just pick a day of the week where we would just allow ourselves to grieve. Is it possible? I don't know. It didn't go too well for Phoebe, as she shared in that episode. So if you haven't listened and want some context, go back to that and listen. But the idea is that it took her some time to really figure out that we don't heal on our own, that it's okay to ask for help. And it's okay to be held. But before she allowed that to happen, she had decided I'm only grieving on Fridays. It's almost like this stance of defiance against grief, that I think so many of us when we're grieving, and we're feeling sick and tired of being sick and tired, unsure of really what to do about it, often finding ourselves downward spiraling and thoughts. And sometimes feeling like, instead of it coming in waves, it just feels like this consistent freight train that's dragging you along, whichever you're feeling today. Like you're being dragged by a freight train, or you're riding the wave, expecting to feel the calm again, is another novel thought to think. If only I could just choose one day of the week, to not feel so miserable. It doesn't work, my friends, because you take yourself everywhere you go. And all of the unprocessed and undealt with emotions and incomplete feelings towards your loved one or whether they're dead or alive, whether they're still in your life or not. Whether it was less than loving relationship, all of that stuff, the emotion, the sorrow, the pain. It goes wherever you go. Because you take you everywhere. It's like we can't just dump our luggage on one day of the week and just let it all come out. Although we can, but not and then package it all up back in the suitcase and not think that we're not carrying that with us the rest of the week. Again, it just doesn't work. So today is going to be short and sweet. Because what I'm feeling called to share with you today is that we can't choose to just grieve one day out of the week. I mean, we can you can choose that. Who am I to say you can't. But don't be fooled to think that it's not infiltrating all the little nooks and crannies of your heart. It's not impacting the language you use in the quiet of your own mind or to others. It's that voice in your head that never goes away.

I would just challenge you to consider rather than trying to choose one day a week to grieve, and essentially setting yourself up for failure, why not seek somebody where you can be held, seek somebody who can be your heart with yours to truly listen without criticism, analysis or judgment. And maybe that means it's three days a week, you're meeting with that person. The big difference between that and choosing only one day a week to allow yourself to feel is that those three days you're taking action. And that's the difference. So I hope this quickie takeaways and reflections episode was helpful. I just feel like that is the message that needed to be shared. And know that I am here as a heart with yours whenever you're ready. And remember, when you unleash your heart, you unleash your life. Much love. From my heart to yours, thank you for listening. If you liked this episode, please share it because sharing is caring. And until next time, give and share compassion by being hurt with yours. And if you're hurting know that what you're feeling is normal and natural. Much love my friend