Victoria Volk: Hello, beautiful souls, and welcome to grieving voices. I am your host, Victoria Volk, and today's episode is going to be a little different. It's a solo episode, which I haven't recorded since the end of December before the New Year. And I've been thinking a lot about change lately and how it shapes us, how it challenges us, and ultimately how it helps us grow. And as the staying goes, the only certainties in life are death, taxes, and I would argue to add change.
Change is inevitable, and sometimes we initiated ourselves and sometimes it's thrust upon us by others. In either way, it often feels uncomfortable, even unnerving. It's also fascinating how change brings out the true colors in in other people, including in ourselves. When change is on the horizon, we often revert to what we know and what we've been taught and how to deal with uncertainty. Grief is essentially a change in or an end of a familiar pattern of behavior. So imagine if you and a friend went to lunch every Friday and spoke or spoke on the phone every Sunday, and then suddenly that pattern stopped. Those days would feel different, wouldn't they? We take these patterns for granted until they change. When someone else's changes impact us, we have decisions to make. We might feel anger or sadness, but allowing ourselves to be swept away by those emotions isn't where we want to end up. And sometimes, change becomes the byproduct of asking ourselves or others better questions. It's I've always been that why kid, you know, the kid that always drives everyone nuts asking why, why, why? And if you're going to tell me what to do, then you best tell me why I'm doing it too. I need reasoning behind my actions or behind actions someone else tells me to take and that questioning nature has served me well when it's directed outward. It's also obviously backfired because I can be viewed as sometimes a negative Nancy or a naysayer or a questioner. Right? Like just like someone questioning authority. But lately, I've been turning those those y questions inward. Not lately, I guess throughout my life obviously because it can be a detriment to me too. But the y questions I've been asking myself are Why do I continue certain weekly routines?
Why do I put energy into things that don't light me up? Why am I still doing things that exhaust me? I have the gate of doubt in human design in my human design, which is gate six three, I am the natural skeptic. When I recommend something you can count on the fact that I vetted it thoroughly, but I've learned that when I turn all those questions toward myself, as self doubt, like questioning myself, that's when I'm self sabotaging. So with all that context, I wanna share something important with you today. And this may cause some grief for some of you. And I had my own period of grief coming to this decision. This will be my final episode for a to be determined, amount of time. I am taking a sabbatical from grieving voices. I haven't decided if this pause will last a few months or maybe weeks or be permanent. I am leaving that open because I want to honor whatever emerges during this time away. And I want to be clear that all episodes will remain available. Our work together over these past five years isn't disappearing. It will continue to be a resource for those navigating grief just as as it has always been. When I asked myself why I've continued producing the podcast week after week, many of my answers stem from people pleasing tendencies, especially as of late, So I've been telling myself I had to reach the five year mark in two hundred and fifty episodes.
But when I asked myself, why? Why does that matter? Who does that matter too? I couldn't come up with a reason that truly resonated with me. Each episode requires about five hours of energy between recording and working with my virtual assistant not to mention the financial investment. That's energy not going toward people who matter most in my life. The creative projects brewing within me or simply having the space to just be. For the past five years, I've poured my heart and soul into changing the narrative around grief working toward a world where we can talk about grief like we talk about the weather. I'm profoundly grateful to everyone who has joined me on that mission. Guest who have shared their stories, listeners who have opened their hearts in the community we've built together. When I finally told a friend, my decision to pause the podcast and I set it out loud, It was as if this wave of relief washed over me. I felt this pressure release and I experienced expansion and excitement in that moment. I am excited about what this change could mean. The sabbatical is an opportunity to give myself the energetic time and space to be in creative flow with whatever comes up. I might even start blogging again. I might develop new ways to serve the the grieving community, or I could rest and replenish my creative well. The beauty is in the not knowing. Imagine how different our world would be if the seasons never changed. Change is necessary for our growth and our evolution, and it helps us discover what we're capable of even when it feels uncomfortable or painful. I want to express my deepest gratitude to each of you who has listened, shared, commented on, and supported this podcast. Together, we've created something meaningful that has touched lives and opened hearts. That doesn't end with the sabbatical. It simply retransforms. And if you'd like to stay connected during this transition, you can find me through my newsletter or on social media. And I'll be sharing updates there as as they emerge. And you can check out the show notes for links to connect in that way. And as we part ways for now, I invite you to consider the changes you might be resisting in your own life. What might be possible if you leaned into that change instead? What? Why questions might help you to uncover your own path forward? Thank you for being on this journey with me until our paths cross again, whether he or elsewhere. Remember that your grieving voice matters, your grief matters, And change while challenging can lead to beautiful new beginnings. With deep gratitude and so much love, this is grieving voices signing off for now. And remember, when you unleash your heart, you unleash your life. Much love. From my heart to yours, thank you for listening. If you like this episode, please share it because sharing is caring. And until next time, give and share compassion by being a hurt with years. And if you're hurting, know that what you're feeling is normal and natural. Much love my friend.