{"version":"1.0.0","segments":[{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":8.16,"endTime":11.7,"body":"This is Victoria"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":8.16,"endTime":11.7,"body":"of theunleashedheart.com and"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":11.7,"endTime":15.27,"body":"ou're listening to grieving"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":11.7,"endTime":15.27,"body":"oices, a podcast for hurting"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":15.27,"endTime":19.05,"body":"earts who desire to be heard."},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":15.27,"endTime":19.05,"body":"r anyone who wants to learn how"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":19.05,"endTime":23.16,"body":"o better support loved ones"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":19.05,"endTime":23.16,"body":"xperiencing loss. As a 30 plus"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":23.16,"endTime":26.67,"body":"ear griever in advanced grief"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":23.16,"endTime":26.67,"body":"ecovery methods specialist, I"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":26.67,"endTime":30.03,"body":"now how badly the conversation"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":26.67,"endTime":30.03,"body":"round grief needs to change."},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":30.66,"endTime":34.38,"body":"hrough this podcast, I aim to"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":30.66,"endTime":34.38,"body":"ducate gravers and non gravers"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":34.38,"endTime":38.85,"body":"like, spread hope and inspire"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":34.38,"endTime":38.85,"body":"ompassion toward those hurting."},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":39.36,"endTime":43.11,"body":"astly, by providing my heart"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":39.36,"endTime":43.11,"body":"ith yours and this platform,"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":43.47,"endTime":47.13,"body":"rievers had the opportunity to"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":43.47,"endTime":47.13,"body":"hare their wisdom and stories"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":47.28,"endTime":51.57,"body":"f loss and resiliency. How"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":47.28,"endTime":51.57,"body":"bout we talk about grief like"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":51.57,"endTime":58.29,"body":"e talked about the weather?"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":51.57,"endTime":58.29,"body":"et's get started. Hi, there."},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":58.32,"endTime":62.73,"body":"hank you for tuning in to"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":58.32,"endTime":62.73,"body":"rieving voices today. This is"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":62.73,"endTime":68.25,"body":"pisode 57, takeaways and"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":62.73,"endTime":68.25,"body":"eflections. And today I'm going"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":68.25,"endTime":73.23,"body":"o be talking about Episode 55"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":68.25,"endTime":73.23,"body":"ith Larry Indiviglia called"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":73.23,"endTime":78.9,"body":"hoice and Chance and, Episode"},{"speaker":"Victoria Volk","startTime":73.23,"endTime":78.9,"body":"7 with Michel St. Jean Widows"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":78.9,"endTime":84.18,"body":"Walking the Path of"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":78.9,"endTime":84.18,"body":"umulative Loss. As I was"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":84.18,"endTime":86.82,"body":"hinking about these two"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":84.18,"endTime":86.82,"body":"pisodes, the one thought that"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":86.82,"endTime":91.53,"body":"ame to my mind was, especially"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":86.82,"endTime":91.53,"body":"hen talking about Larry's"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":91.53,"endTime":97.53,"body":"pisode is, his life by choice"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":91.53,"endTime":97.53,"body":"r is it by chance? And"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":97.53,"endTime":101.43,"body":"specially in grief, many people"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":97.53,"endTime":101.43,"body":"ay say that everything happens"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":101.43,"endTime":106.83,"body":"or a reason. And as a griever,"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":101.43,"endTime":106.83,"body":"ou don't want to hear that. You"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":106.83,"endTime":115.83,"body":"on't want to hear that there's"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":106.83,"endTime":115.83,"body":"ome  reason why your loved one"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":115.83,"endTime":120.21,"body":"s no longer with you. That's"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":115.83,"endTime":120.21,"body":"he last thing that you really"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":120.21,"endTime":123.78,"body":"ant to hear. Have you ever"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":120.21,"endTime":123.78,"body":"hought about though how the"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":123.78,"endTime":132.75,"body":"oments that happen in your"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":123.78,"endTime":132.75,"body":"ife, how they come to be? So"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":132.75,"endTime":138.09,"body":"uch of what we experience is"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":132.75,"endTime":138.09,"body":"ecause we made a choice,"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":138.78,"endTime":146.55,"body":"ecause we chose something that"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":138.78,"endTime":146.55,"body":"ad an impact and there's cause"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":146.55,"endTime":151.83,"body":"nd effect. So you make one"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":146.55,"endTime":151.83,"body":"hoice, and this thing happens,"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":151.83,"endTime":157.41,"body":"ou make another choice and this"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":151.83,"endTime":157.41,"body":"ther thing happens. But like in"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":157.41,"endTime":163.29,"body":"arry's story, it really"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":157.41,"endTime":163.29,"body":"evolved around making the"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":163.29,"endTime":168.9,"body":"hoice to take a chance. And for"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":163.29,"endTime":168.9,"body":"arry it  was taking a chance on"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":168.9,"endTime":173.13,"body":"ove. But if you really think"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":168.9,"endTime":173.13,"body":"bout it aren't all of the"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":173.82,"endTime":179.73,"body":"osses we experience in our"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":173.82,"endTime":179.73,"body":"ives, due to making a choice to"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":180.93,"endTime":188.61,"body":"ither commit to that person or"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":180.93,"endTime":188.61,"body":"ove to that place or befriend"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":188.64,"endTime":195.36,"body":"hat person, it all comes back"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":188.64,"endTime":195.36,"body":"o taking the chance, making the"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":195.36,"endTime":199.86,"body":"hoice and taking the chance."},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":195.36,"endTime":199.86,"body":"nd like I said, whether that be"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":199.86,"endTime":205.29,"body":"ove or that be a friendship, or"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":199.86,"endTime":205.29,"body":"move. We all make these"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":205.29,"endTime":212.61,"body":"hoices. Larry shared how he"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":205.29,"endTime":212.61,"body":"ook a chance on love and ended"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":212.61,"endTime":217.17,"body":"p having an eight month"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":212.61,"endTime":217.17,"body":"elationship with a woman who"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":217.62,"endTime":223.44,"body":"ltimately passed away of"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":217.62,"endTime":223.44,"body":"ancer. And he would do it all"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":223.44,"endTime":228.96,"body":"ver again in a heartbeat. And I"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":223.44,"endTime":228.96,"body":"hink for any Grievers out"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":228.96,"endTime":235.38,"body":"here, I'll speak for myself, I"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":228.96,"endTime":235.38,"body":"ould rather have had that"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":235.38,"endTime":240.27,"body":"xperience of loving that person"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":235.38,"endTime":240.27,"body":"nd being loved in return than"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":240.27,"endTime":245.85,"body":"ever at all. And especially as"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":240.27,"endTime":245.85,"body":"parent, which is the greatest"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":245.85,"endTime":249.48,"body":"ove I think anyone could ever"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":245.85,"endTime":249.48,"body":"ossibly have the privilege of"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":249.48,"endTime":254.73,"body":"xperiencing. I don't know what"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":249.48,"endTime":254.73,"body":"t's like to lose a child, but I"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":254.73,"endTime":260.28,"body":"o feel for myself. And I think"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":254.73,"endTime":260.28,"body":"ny parent would say this, that"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":260.28,"endTime":265.5,"body":"ou would rather have had that"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":260.28,"endTime":265.5,"body":"hild in your life than I've"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":265.5,"endTime":270.66,"body":"ever had them in your life at"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":265.5,"endTime":270.66,"body":"ll.  If they were to pass away,"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":270.66,"endTime":279.96,"body":"f you were to lose them. Love"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":270.66,"endTime":279.96,"body":"n all its forms is a great"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":279.96,"endTime":285.87,"body":"eacher for us. And that's where"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":279.96,"endTime":285.87,"body":"think a lot of people can use"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":285.87,"endTime":293.25,"body":"he phrase, \"everything happens"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":285.87,"endTime":293.25,"body":"or a reason\", a nd I struggle"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":293.25,"endTime":297.57,"body":"ith that. I struggle with that"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":293.25,"endTime":297.57,"body":"hrase because I don't feel like"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":297.57,"endTime":303.6,"body":"here has to be a reason for us"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":297.57,"endTime":303.6,"body":"o to grow or evolve. But I do"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":303.6,"endTime":308.97,"body":"eel like we are presented with"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":303.6,"endTime":308.97,"body":"xperiences"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":308.93,"endTime":316.16,"body":"that shaped us, and challenged"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":308.93,"endTime":316.16,"body":"us, and it's what we decide to"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":316.16,"endTime":323.15,"body":"do in those moments. It's what"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":316.16,"endTime":323.15,"body":"we choose to do in those"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":323.15,"endTime":331.43,"body":"moments. It's essentially what"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":323.15,"endTime":331.43,"body":"freewill is, having the ability"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":331.43,"endTime":338.24,"body":"to choose. And we can choose to"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":331.43,"endTime":338.24,"body":"grow from those experiences, or"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":338.24,"endTime":343.37,"body":"we can choose to lay in decay,"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":338.24,"endTime":343.37,"body":"like one of my future guests"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":343.58,"endTime":348.29,"body":"shares in her episode coming up,"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":343.58,"endTime":348.29,"body":"when you lay, you decay. I've"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":348.29,"endTime":354.29,"body":"never forgotten it when she said"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":348.29,"endTime":354.29,"body":"it. And so Larry shares his love"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":354.59,"endTime":361.07,"body":"and loss. And, as does my other"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":354.59,"endTime":361.07,"body":"guest, Michelle St. Jane, in"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":361.07,"endTime":367.07,"body":"Episode 56, she took a chance to"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":361.07,"endTime":367.07,"body":"fall in love, she first took a"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":367.07,"endTime":373.85,"body":"chance to leave her family of"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":367.07,"endTime":373.85,"body":"origin to go all by herself, I"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":373.85,"endTime":379.34,"body":"believe, 16-17 years old. And to"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":373.85,"endTime":379.34,"body":"see the world, she wanted to see"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":379.34,"endTime":383.33,"body":"the world, she ended up falling"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":379.34,"endTime":383.33,"body":"in love, again, took a chance,"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":384.02,"endTime":388.19,"body":"ended up getting married and"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":384.02,"endTime":388.19,"body":"having children with him. And he"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":388.19,"endTime":395.84,"body":"ended up passing away, very"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":388.19,"endTime":395.84,"body":"suddenly, and unexpectedly. And"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":397.1,"endTime":399.8,"body":"there was one part of her"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":397.1,"endTime":399.8,"body":"episode that really stuck out to"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":399.8,"endTime":405.71,"body":"me something she said, \"I hear"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":399.8,"endTime":405.71,"body":"your heartbeat\". When she's"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":405.71,"endTime":409.28,"body":"talking about her husband, she"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":405.71,"endTime":409.28,"body":"said, \"I hear your heartbeat but"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":409.28,"endTime":413.45,"body":"you're already gone\". It's in"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":409.28,"endTime":413.45,"body":"the hospital realizing that,"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":414.05,"endTime":420.08,"body":"although he's there, physically,"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":414.05,"endTime":420.08,"body":"His heart is beating. But he's"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":420.08,"endTime":427.49,"body":"already gone. He was brain dead,"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":420.08,"endTime":427.49,"body":"he had an aneurysm in his lungs."},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":429.65,"endTime":435.14,"body":"And she had to make the choice"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":429.65,"endTime":435.14,"body":"to take him off life support."},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":436.19,"endTime":441.89,"body":"And raise a nine- month-old, a"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":436.19,"endTime":441.89,"body":"five-year-old, and a"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":441.92,"endTime":447.53,"body":"six-year-old on her own. And I"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":441.92,"endTime":447.53,"body":"know many women end up in this"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":447.53,"endTime":454.07,"body":"position, many husbands, and"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":447.53,"endTime":454.07,"body":"many significant others end up"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":454.07,"endTime":459.23,"body":"in this position of you know, of"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":454.07,"endTime":459.23,"body":"loss and then are having to"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":459.23,"endTime":465.05,"body":"raise children or even just"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":459.23,"endTime":465.05,"body":"carry on without children. It's"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":465.05,"endTime":468.65,"body":"like, there's no manual for"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":465.05,"endTime":468.65,"body":"that. There's no manual for"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":468.65,"endTime":474.44,"body":"grief. And she said grief, it"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":468.65,"endTime":474.44,"body":"helps us to know the direction"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":474.44,"endTime":479.0,"body":"we want to go in. And I"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":474.44,"endTime":479.0,"body":"completely agree if we're open"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":479.0,"endTime":485.3,"body":"to it, but we have to be open to"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":479.0,"endTime":485.3,"body":"it. We have to be open to what"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":485.3,"endTime":491.09,"body":"it's telling us, to what our"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":485.3,"endTime":491.09,"body":"bodies are telling us as we're"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":491.09,"endTime":496.91,"body":"going through this emotional"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":491.09,"endTime":496.91,"body":"roller coaster. I do want to"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":496.91,"endTime":499.58,"body":"highlight one thing she said and"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":496.91,"endTime":499.58,"body":"she mentioned during her"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":499.58,"endTime":502.82,"body":"episode, she mentioned about the"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":499.58,"endTime":502.82,"body":"stages of grief and I just want"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":502.82,"endTime":508.52,"body":"to reiterate that there are no"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":502.82,"endTime":508.52,"body":"stages of grief. I actually have"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":508.67,"endTime":514.4,"body":"Ken Ross, Elisabeth Kubler Ross'"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":508.67,"endTime":514.4,"body":"son, who will be on my podcast"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":514.4,"endTime":518.93,"body":"coming up. And we're going to"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":514.4,"endTime":518.93,"body":"tackle this very topic of the"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":518.93,"endTime":522.8,"body":"stages of grief because it's as"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":518.93,"endTime":522.8,"body":"mother's work that was"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":522.8,"endTime":528.83,"body":"misinterpreted about the stages."},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":522.8,"endTime":528.83,"body":"So anyway, I just want to"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":528.83,"endTime":532.22,"body":"reiterate that there are no"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":528.83,"endTime":532.22,"body":"stages. Her work was about"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":534.65,"endTime":538.91,"body":"terminal illness and these"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":534.65,"endTime":538.91,"body":"phases that people go through"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":539.57,"endTime":543.32,"body":"when they're diagnosed. And"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":539.57,"endTime":543.32,"body":"that's not saying that people"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":543.32,"endTime":547.22,"body":"don't have anger and they don't"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":543.32,"endTime":547.22,"body":"have denial and all these things"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":547.7,"endTime":556.58,"body":"in grief. There's just not this"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":547.7,"endTime":556.58,"body":"linear path of grief in the form"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":556.58,"endTime":561.8,"body":"of stages. Another common thing"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":556.58,"endTime":561.8,"body":"that Michelle brought up during"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":561.8,"endTime":574.79,"body":"her episode that many Grievers"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":561.8,"endTime":574.79,"body":"experiences around the same time"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":574.79,"endTime":578.81,"body":"every year, when that loss"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":574.79,"endTime":578.81,"body":"occurred, you have these same"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":578.81,"endTime":583.82,"body":"familiar feelings that come out"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":578.81,"endTime":583.82,"body":"of the woodwork. They can appear"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":583.82,"endTime":587.78,"body":"out of nowhere seemingly, and"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":583.82,"endTime":587.78,"body":"she said every year or three"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":587.78,"endTime":593.96,"body":"days in October, when her"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":587.78,"endTime":593.96,"body":"husband had gone into coma. Even"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":593.96,"endTime":599.21,"body":"25 years later, she said she"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":593.96,"endTime":599.21,"body":"still had those same angry"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":599.21,"endTime":605.6,"body":"thoughts and feelings and it was"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":599.21,"endTime":605.6,"body":"pulled back to the past. Again,"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":605.6,"endTime":606.86,"body":"every year,"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":607.71,"endTime":614.76,"body":"post his death, she had a choice"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":607.71,"endTime":614.76,"body":"to be pulled back to that past"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":614.76,"endTime":624.42,"body":"again. And eventually she did"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":614.76,"endTime":624.42,"body":"find a way to not find herself"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":624.48,"endTime":630.78,"body":"in that position again. But"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":624.48,"endTime":630.78,"body":"again, it comes back to making a"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":630.78,"endTime":638.1,"body":"choice, she had to make a choice"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":630.78,"endTime":638.1,"body":"to look at another October in a"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":638.1,"endTime":642.09,"body":"different way, experience"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":638.1,"endTime":642.09,"body":"October in a different way. And"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":642.09,"endTime":647.22,"body":"it was through this cumulative"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":642.09,"endTime":647.22,"body":"healing, all these different"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":647.22,"endTime":653.28,"body":"things she was doing that helped"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":647.22,"endTime":653.28,"body":"her find her way out of that ru"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":653.46,"endTime":657.27,"body":"t every year. And so I really"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":653.46,"endTime":657.27,"body":"encourage you to listen to her"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":657.27,"endTime":664.08,"body":"episode on how she managed to"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":657.27,"endTime":664.08,"body":"find her way through all those"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":664.08,"endTime":668.4,"body":"October's and where she's at"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":664.08,"endTime":668.4,"body":"today, because I think it's a"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":668.4,"endTime":675.42,"body":"really great illustration of a"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":668.4,"endTime":675.42,"body":"woman who has endured many"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":675.42,"endTime":680.13,"body":"different types of losses, which"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":675.42,"endTime":680.13,"body":"are cumulative, every loss, it's"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":680.13,"endTime":684.51,"body":"cumulative, it stacks up on each"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":680.13,"endTime":684.51,"body":"other. And we have an"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":684.54,"endTime":690.39,"body":"opportunity to learn from these"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":684.54,"endTime":690.39,"body":"things. And it's not to say that"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":691.41,"endTime":695.82,"body":"happened for a reason, so you"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":691.41,"endTime":695.82,"body":"could learn these lessons. It's"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":695.82,"endTime":705.93,"body":"just life, it's just life, it"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":695.82,"endTime":705.93,"body":"seems like such a simplified"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":705.93,"endTime":709.77,"body":"thing to say, like this just"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":705.93,"endTime":709.77,"body":"life, like there are so many"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":709.77,"endTime":713.31,"body":"people I've met and come across"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":709.77,"endTime":713.31,"body":"who will say that death is just"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":713.31,"endTime":719.22,"body":"a part of life. Well, that's"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":713.31,"endTime":719.22,"body":"life, right? And some of the"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":719.22,"endTime":723.84,"body":"people that say that, truth be"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":719.22,"endTime":723.84,"body":"told, haven't experienced a lot"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":723.84,"endTime":728.43,"body":"of loss or trauma either. And"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":723.84,"endTime":728.43,"body":"so, we have to be careful,"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":728.7,"endTime":733.65,"body":"because words matter. The words"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":728.7,"endTime":733.65,"body":"matter that we say, especially"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":733.68,"endTime":737.91,"body":"to Grievers and around Grievers,"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":733.68,"endTime":737.91,"body":"and about grief. I want to"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":737.91,"endTime":742.2,"body":"circle back to Larry's story"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":737.91,"endTime":742.2,"body":"about love and loss because"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":744.78,"endTime":748.32,"body":"there are many people who, if"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":744.78,"endTime":748.32,"body":"presented with that same"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":748.35,"endTime":752.19,"body":"situation would have turned the"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":748.35,"endTime":752.19,"body":"other way, would have walked"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":752.19,"endTime":759.12,"body":"away. And how about the love of"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":752.19,"endTime":759.12,"body":"his life who took a chance to go"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":759.12,"endTime":765.15,"body":"on a dating website knowing full"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":759.12,"endTime":765.15,"body":"well that she had cancer and"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":767.4,"endTime":772.86,"body":"taking a chance in doing that."},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":767.4,"endTime":772.86,"body":"Knowing her worth as a human"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":772.86,"endTime":777.69,"body":"being despite what she was going"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":772.86,"endTime":777.69,"body":"through with her health, that"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":779.43,"endTime":784.41,"body":"love was the answer, love was"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":779.43,"endTime":784.41,"body":"something that could carry her"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":784.41,"endTime":790.11,"body":"through her days, love was the"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":784.41,"endTime":790.11,"body":"antidote to what she was going"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":790.11,"endTime":803.61,"body":"to experience. And I commend,"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":790.11,"endTime":803.61,"body":"first of all, the awareness of"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":806.19,"endTime":809.52,"body":"knowing your own worth as a"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":806.19,"endTime":809.52,"body":"human being, because we're all"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":809.52,"endTime":813.69,"body":"worthy of love, right?"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":809.52,"endTime":813.69,"body":"Regardless of what we're"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":813.69,"endTime":819.18,"body":"experiencing, who we are on the"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":813.69,"endTime":819.18,"body":"outside what we look like, we're"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":819.18,"endTime":825.84,"body":"all worthy of love, even if we"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":819.18,"endTime":825.84,"body":"have stage four cancer. And so I"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":825.84,"endTime":829.89,"body":"think it's incredible that she"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":825.84,"endTime":829.89,"body":"found somebody who was willing"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":829.89,"endTime":835.2,"body":"to walk beside her in that. And"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":829.89,"endTime":835.2,"body":"so I commended Larry in that"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":835.2,"endTime":841.83,"body":"episode, because that takes a"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":835.2,"endTime":841.83,"body":"lot of personal commitment to"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":841.83,"endTime":845.7,"body":"stick beside somebody through"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":841.83,"endTime":845.7,"body":"their good days and their bad"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":845.7,"endTime":849.9,"body":"days when essentially you really"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":845.7,"endTime":849.9,"body":"don't know each other really"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":849.9,"endTime":854.43,"body":"well. Right? It's not like they"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":849.9,"endTime":854.43,"body":"were married for 15-20 years,"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":854.43,"endTime":862.38,"body":"and then she developed cancer"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":854.43,"endTime":862.38,"body":"diagnosis. So I just found the"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":862.38,"endTime":868.29,"body":"story itself pretty incredible"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":862.38,"endTime":868.29,"body":"that he was willing to go extra"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":868.29,"endTime":875.58,"body":"mile with her in the love that"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":868.29,"endTime":875.58,"body":"he wanted to give her, and she"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":875.58,"endTime":882.48,"body":"to him. I think it's a beautiful"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":875.58,"endTime":882.48,"body":"thing. And if people who are"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":882.48,"endTime":884.28,"body":"going through something like"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":882.48,"endTime":884.28,"body":"that can"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":885.92,"endTime":892.64,"body":"find the worth in themselves, to"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":885.92,"endTime":892.64,"body":"take a chance on themselves, and"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":892.64,"endTime":897.17,"body":"then find someone to take a"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":892.64,"endTime":897.17,"body":"chance on them. I think it's an"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":897.17,"endTime":901.52,"body":"absolutely beautiful thing but"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":897.17,"endTime":901.52,"body":"it makes you really think about"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":901.88,"endTime":909.8,"body":"if you're not someone who is"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":901.88,"endTime":909.8,"body":"opening your heart to love. Why"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":909.8,"endTime":916.76,"body":"is that? I mean, there's fear"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":909.8,"endTime":916.76,"body":"and rejection. And certainly I'm"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":916.79,"endTime":922.34,"body":"sure many people or she had"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":916.79,"endTime":922.34,"body":"people rejecting her, when once"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":922.34,"endTime":926.06,"body":"they found out she had cancer,"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":922.34,"endTime":926.06,"body":"or maybe that was what she led"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":926.06,"endTime":929.87,"body":"the conversation with. And they"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":926.06,"endTime":929.87,"body":"were like, I'm gone. Or maybe"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":929.87,"endTime":935.03,"body":"she gave them an out. Maybe upon"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":929.87,"endTime":935.03,"body":"meeting or talking, she said,"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":935.03,"endTime":938.03,"body":"\"Hey, I just want to let you"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":935.03,"endTime":938.03,"body":"know I have stage four cancer,"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":938.69,"endTime":943.28,"body":"totally understand if you don't"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":938.69,"endTime":943.28,"body":"want to, you know, walk with me"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":943.28,"endTime":948.41,"body":"through this\". I'm thinking"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":943.28,"endTime":948.41,"body":"back. And I'm just curious how"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":948.41,"endTime":953.6,"body":"many times that happened. But if"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":948.41,"endTime":953.6,"body":"you're going through cancer"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":953.6,"endTime":957.32,"body":"right now, if you're"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":953.6,"endTime":957.32,"body":"experiencing a diagnosis now,"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":958.04,"endTime":962.66,"body":"and you don't have love in your"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":958.04,"endTime":962.66,"body":"life, maybe let this story"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":962.66,"endTime":970.25,"body":"inspire you to take a chance on"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":962.66,"endTime":970.25,"body":"yourself, to allow somebody to"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":970.25,"endTime":975.71,"body":"take a chance on you, too. One"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":970.25,"endTime":975.71,"body":"of the things that Larry said"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":975.71,"endTime":979.37,"body":"was \"you can't unconditionally"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":975.71,"endTime":979.37,"body":"love, if you don't love yourself"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":979.37,"endTime":982.79,"body":"first\". And I do think it"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":979.37,"endTime":982.79,"body":"probably takes an incredible"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":982.79,"endTime":990.29,"body":"sense of self love, for someone"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":982.79,"endTime":990.29,"body":"to have that love to give"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":990.35,"endTime":1001.3,"body":"someone that you kind of learn"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":990.35,"endTime":1001.3,"body":"to know, through cancer. So, I"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1001.3,"endTime":1004.15,"body":"encourage you to listen to that"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1001.3,"endTime":1004.15,"body":"episode if you need a little"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1004.15,"endTime":1007.93,"body":"inspiration in the love"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1004.15,"endTime":1007.93,"body":"department. And even if you"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1007.93,"endTime":1014.71,"body":"don't, it could be friendship,"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1007.93,"endTime":1014.71,"body":"too. You don't have to walk away"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1014.71,"endTime":1017.65,"body":"from a friendship if someone"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1014.71,"endTime":1017.65,"body":"gets diagnosed with cancer"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1017.65,"endTime":1020.71,"body":"because you're scared, or"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1017.65,"endTime":1020.71,"body":"because you're fearful, you"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1020.71,"endTime":1024.34,"body":"don't know what to say. Just be"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1020.71,"endTime":1024.34,"body":"honest about those things. \"I"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1024.34,"endTime":1028.27,"body":"don't know what to say, I'm"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1024.34,"endTime":1028.27,"body":"afraid what's going to come up"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1028.27,"endTime":1032.26,"body":"for me if I sit with you through"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1028.27,"endTime":1032.26,"body":"this?\",  Because that's natural,"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1032.32,"endTime":1039.7,"body":"that's normal. Does it take a"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1032.32,"endTime":1039.7,"body":"special person to sit with"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1039.7,"endTime":1045.43,"body":"someone through the most trying"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1039.7,"endTime":1045.43,"body":"and challenging times?, Of"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1045.43,"endTime":1051.88,"body":"course it does. Is it especially"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1045.43,"endTime":1051.88,"body":"challenging too during cancer"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1051.88,"endTime":1054.34,"body":"treatments and all of these"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1051.88,"endTime":1054.34,"body":"things that someone is going"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1054.34,"endTime":1060.13,"body":"through, plus the emotional"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1054.34,"endTime":1060.13,"body":"roller coaster for them? It is,"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1060.19,"endTime":1068.05,"body":"absolutely it is. How beautiful"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1060.19,"endTime":1068.05,"body":"of an experience it can be and"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1068.08,"endTime":1073.93,"body":"what you could miss out on."},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1068.08,"endTime":1073.93,"body":"Larry said \"the ability to"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1073.93,"endTime":1080.35,"body":"choose his hope for the future\"."},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1073.93,"endTime":1080.35,"body":"That is the hope, the fact that"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1080.35,"endTime":1085.45,"body":"you have the ability to choose."},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1080.35,"endTime":1085.45,"body":"And I've said it several times"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1085.45,"endTime":1091.51,"body":"in my latest posts on Instagram"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1085.45,"endTime":1091.51,"body":"but grief makes you feel like"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1091.51,"endTime":1098.26,"body":"you don't have a choice. But we"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1091.51,"endTime":1098.26,"body":"always do, we always do. Because"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1098.26,"endTime":1105.4,"body":"even doing nothing is making a"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1098.26,"endTime":1105.4,"body":"choice. The greatest thing"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1105.43,"endTime":1111.34,"body":"you'll ever learn is to love and"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1105.43,"endTime":1111.34,"body":"be loved in return. And I think"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1111.34,"endTime":1115.63,"body":"that was a great message from"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1111.34,"endTime":1115.63,"body":"Larry's episode. And I will end"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1115.63,"endTime":1120.82,"body":"it there. Thank you for tuning"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1115.63,"endTime":1120.82,"body":"in to today's episode. And"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1121.27,"endTime":1125.77,"body":"before I go, I want to share"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1121.27,"endTime":1125.77,"body":"that I have a new energy quiz."},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1126.22,"endTime":1130.57,"body":"You can learn your energy type."},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1126.22,"endTime":1130.57,"body":"And if you go to my website,"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1132.94,"endTime":1136.93,"body":"www.theunleashedheart.com, the"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1132.94,"endTime":1136.93,"body":"link is in the show notes. You"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1136.93,"endTime":1143.29,"body":"will find a link to the energy"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1136.93,"endTime":1143.29,"body":"quiz under the Reiki tab. So if"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1143.29,"endTime":1147.52,"body":"you go under services, and then"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1143.29,"endTime":1147.52,"body":"Reiki and then you'll see energy"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1147.52,"endTime":1151.21,"body":"type, just click there and to"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1147.52,"endTime":1151.21,"body":"get started to find your energy"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1151.21,"endTime":1154.81,"body":"type. It takes less than two"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1151.21,"endTime":1154.81,"body":"minutes and you get a handy"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1154.81,"endTime":1162.94,"body":"dandy document to download that"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1154.81,"endTime":1162.94,"body":"helps you uplevel your energy"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1163.03,"endTime":1168.34,"body":"and find also what nurtures and"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1163.03,"endTime":1168.34,"body":"leaks too. So check that out"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1168.37,"endTime":1171.94,"body":"while you're on my website. And"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1168.37,"endTime":1171.94,"body":"again, the link will be in the"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1171.94,"endTime":1177.43,"body":"show notes to my website for"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1171.94,"endTime":1177.43,"body":"that. And until next time, when"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1177.43,"endTime":1181.51,"body":"you unleash your heart, you"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1177.43,"endTime":1181.51,"body":"unleash your life, much love."},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1199.03,"endTime":1202.42,"body":"From my heart to you yours."},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1199.03,"endTime":1202.42,"body":"Thank you for listening. If you"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1202.42,"endTime":1206.2,"body":"liked this episode, please share"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1202.42,"endTime":1206.2,"body":"it because Sharing is caring."},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1206.8,"endTime":1210.7,"body":"And until next time, give and"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1206.8,"endTime":1210.7,"body":"share compassion by being hurt"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1210.7,"endTime":1214.03,"body":"with yours. And if you're"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1210.7,"endTime":1214.03,"body":"hurting know that what you're"},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1214.03,"endTime":1218.35,"body":"feeling is normal and natural."},{"speaker":"on't Sleep","startTime":1214.03,"endTime":1218.35,"body":"Much love my friend."}]}