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FOR BETTER OR WORSE & THEN SOME | DO PARENTS EVER REGRET HAVING KIDS?

• Mature The Servant • Season 1 • Episode 18

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VINCE AND PARRIS RETURN TO DISCUSS THE TIK TOK VIRAL VIDEOS WHERE PARENTS EXPRESS THEIR REGRET OR STRESS OF HAVING KIDS AND WE ASK OURSELVES THE SAME QUESTION. BE READY TO LAUGH, THINK AND REFLECT ON YOUR OWN PARENTAL JOURNEY. 

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SPEAKER_02

Okay, well, welcome back guys to um another episode of For Better or Worse and Tensor. I almost forgot the name again. I almost forgot it. It is your host Vince with my co-host, my wife, Paris.

unknown

It's me.

SPEAKER_02

It's me. What's the little girl that's on YouTube? Oh yeah. Um. How you feeling, babe?

SPEAKER_00

I'm feeling good. Wow. I was trying to try to take a moment to gauge. I should use an honest answer. Good. To reflect. Um. I have a full belly. Um wow. I went to work. I got home from work safely.

SPEAKER_01

Yes, she did.

SPEAKER_00

The Lord is good. Yes. I'm feeling grateful, good. I'm happy to have this moment to record another poly.

SPEAKER_02

I know, it seems like we've been trying all week. Weeks. At least two weeks, we have been trying to record this pod, man. It is life has been life.

SPEAKER_00

And we've been trying to, you know, it's April. We've been trying to get some stuff organized and get some spring cleaning started. Rather, and it's just been saving us so much time and energy.

SPEAKER_02

Speaking of spring cleaning, we we we finally got your room together. We've been working on working on a space for you to have inside the home where you can kind of have your own space to go and relax and chill, kind of escape to yourself, and we finally were able to get that together. You were able to spend some time in it. How are you feeling? Like how did it how how was the feeling of being in your own space with like your own stuff in there and your candles, your smell goods, your TV, your new look, your chair and stuff.

SPEAKER_00

I don't know. It feels weird. It feels weird. Um, being the oldest, even though I had my room, like living space, I always had siblings coming in there. Yeah. So it's like unless, you know, I was sleeping or like doing homework, it's like they were all we was always in there watching shows and laughing and being silly. So to have a space where it's just like just me with my thoughts or just somewhere to like reflect or just meditate. I have to get used to it, but it doesn't feel like I've settled in just yet. It still feels very new. It's a concept that I'm not familiar with.

SPEAKER_02

Yes, I can understand that.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. Being the oldest, but not just that, but the house I grew up in is just always people there.

SPEAKER_02

Invasion of privacy.

SPEAKER_00

I mean, that's one way to phrase it, but I'm just always used to having.

SPEAKER_02

You're not used to having like your own space to be alone to.

SPEAKER_00

No, and again, I'm not used to always like setting that boundary of okay, I'm about to go be by myself. That's true. Like, let me see. I was six or seven when my sister was born. So again, it's like being that young, you don't even necessarily understand the value. Yes, to appreciate that. Because a lot of the times I would play by myself. I do remember that, but then I would always want to like ask my mom, can I go to my cousin's house? Can I go to my cousin's house? So, yeah, it's kind of it's a concept I have to get used to, but I understand the necessity of it because you can have a place to recharge.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah. And I think it's important to separate yourself sometimes from your role.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Like when, like I said, when you're in the house, it's like every room just about the house is like. Ah, somebody. I'm in this room role. You have to play your role, yeah. It's like I'm I'm mom, dad in this role, mom, dad in this role. In this room, I'm mom, dad in this role. So you gotta have a space where it's just like, no, this room you're just this, or in this room you're just parents.

SPEAKER_01

Like, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02

And I have minds. I mean, mines is also kind of a word space. You guys come up in the space line then every now and then, but it, you know, it's my space to kind of come up here and just be me, get in and watch stuff that I want to watch, chill, relax. I don't, you know, I'm not, I don't feel overcrowded. And I think that's a room, that's something you needed as well. So now that you have it, it's like what am I doing? Yours is I'm gonna be honest, yours is nicer, though. Yours is nicer. So I've been look I was when we were in there, I'm like, I should have had this room. I should have gave her the out there. But I mean, I obviously I need more space out here for work, but it is a nice room. I think it is really nice. I'd be happy to see you have a space.

SPEAKER_00

I just kind of again, it's like, what do I do? Because then to a certain extent, I start feeling isolate myself. Like I start to kind of I can understand. But it's like, no, it's nothing wrong with that.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah. And you have to be uh, what's the word? Um intentional. Yes. About making that time for yourself. Because easy you can go to your room and to the bedroom and be like, oh, I'm just hanging out in the bedroom. But it's like even in the bedroom.

SPEAKER_00

And that has kind of been my hangout space.

SPEAKER_02

Yes.

SPEAKER_00

So now I was like, I don't have to like here. I can go into the room now. Yep. Because it took a bunch of elbow grease to a lot of elbow grease.

SPEAKER_02

We, you know, finally cleaned it out after our previous house guests that we had living here. And um boy, what a cleaning job. So um, speaking of that, you also got a brand new ring.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Daddy Cash, yeah, with a brand new blang blang. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

But that's you gotta understand. Having my ring for as long as I've had it, and then having a new one or a different one, is very like what?

SPEAKER_02

Is it like so now that you've been wearing it out for this week and stuff like that over the weekend and this week? Like, have you gotten used to wearing it, or do you still catch yourself like having to look at it and be like, whoa, or like I catch myself looking at it? Did you show did you show anybody like Angela that you judge a hate girl look?

SPEAKER_00

I didn't do that. It was personally. I just not because I was not because I was ashamed. I just don't do that. I just and it's not that I again I like keeping things in. You're so private. Yes. It was so private. Good things happen in your life, you're like, 'You're no one.' No, because I'll say this. I've had like things that excited me, and then I've had people like just dump on it, and I don't like that feeling. So I like to keep to myself that joy, that peace. I feel it. So when I'm at work at my desk, I'm just like, oh, it's so beautiful though. It's so pretty. But no one must know. But if someone basically kind of like I keep the good things of the hidden treasure to myself. Now somebody notices it. Okay, yeah. Yes. They might eventually, because it's a black blow.

SPEAKER_02

So I thought we would talk about something we were gonna, we were gonna talk about it weeks ago. We were trying to do this. And so um, I was like, well, I'm gonna just hold on to it when we finally get to it. We were watching the video. We were talking, watching the video about all the mothers who are struggling to be parents, and obviously uh the majority of them were like single mothers, but we were just we were just talking about in general, even our idea of like individually and together, how challenging it is to raise a kid and how sometimes you have those. I for some they were having regrets, like regret and even having kids. But I think there's something to like some days you don't feel like being a parent, some days you don't want to do, you don't want the responsibility of the parent, you know, the guardianship that you've been given, or sometimes it's overwhelming to be a parent where it feels like it kind of feels like the job that doesn't turn off, you know? Because it's kind of like even with us, like as partners, as spouses, it's like there are times when I can just take care of myself for a while, you can take care of yourself for a while, we can just go on about our own. But kids feel like they they never give you the break. They never, like, even if I know you're tired, I'm like, okay, let me leave boost game on, like you give her a break. If I'm tired, you're like, oh, let them sleep, I'm gonna let them sleep. Right? But with kids, it's like, you can do them asleep, and they're like, so. And then you're like, I'm dead tired, and they're like, so. Like, so it seems like they it just doesn't turn off. It's like from the moment they wake up to the moment they go to bed. So even they're in the bed, and you're like, what was that noise in that room? Like you're you're just always on, and it can be draining, it can be very tiring. Um, so for you, Bay, like our daughter's seven. Seven years of doing this. Uh, not the alarm.

SPEAKER_00

Well, this must have been from yesterday. Stevie wonder. This is an alarm to wake up from a nap yesterday. See, this is what I'm talking about.

SPEAKER_02

An alarm for a nap. This is exactly what I'm talking about. I need another an alarm for the nap.

SPEAKER_00

Okay, prime example, yesterday.

SPEAKER_02

Right.

SPEAKER_00

I knew I was gonna be tired because we kind of had like a date night on Sunday.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

So after work yesterday, I'm like, I know I need a nap. And sometimes for me, it's like I'm just wondering and I'm not really doing anything, but at the same time, I'm feeling like, what am I supposed to be doing? Right. And I'm like, okay, I should probably, I'm probably just really tired. Like I'm really confused. I said, okay, I'm gonna take a little nap. As soon as I get in the bed and I say, hey, babe, wake me up at 6 30. It was like 5 o'clock. I said, wake me up at 6 30. What's it? I thought you told me to wake you up at 7. No, I said 6 30. But we're gonna get to that.

SPEAKER_02

I think I did wake you up at 7, though.

SPEAKER_00

Okay, I'm gonna remind you what happened.

SPEAKER_02

Okay.

SPEAKER_00

So I I lay down, you say, okay, I'll wake you up. As soon as I lay down, Miss Missy comes in our room and she sees me still. And she's like, this is my this is my time to She hopped in that bed so our bed so fast and cozy up right next to me and said, Mama, can I tell you a story? I said, Well, Kobe, mama's about to take a nap. That's fine, mama. I'll take, I'll tell you a bedtime story, you can take a nap. I'm like, okay, Kobe, if you tell me the story, I'm going to take a nap. Okay. That's not her version though. Like, that's not, doesn't mean the same thing. Because she kept saying, Mama, are you looking? Are you looking? Yeah. Because she plays toca boca. So it's like you move the people around, you come up with your own story, but I'm having to watch now. You have to watch this. I'm just sitting here. And now Vince is playing the game, but he hears all that's going on.

SPEAKER_02

Behind you, she's because at the same time, Kobe is not like, oh, mommy's tired. Let me change the volume of my voice. She's like, actually, let's turn it up. Telling the story. She's like, let's get into it.

SPEAKER_00

It doesn't help that the story is about a football game, soccer game, racing game. Like everybody's playing all these sports at once. Yeah. So she's full on acting out every participant. Yeah. So that's when that's when she started saying, huh? Because they were playing football. Yeah. And I said, Kobe, she's going crazy. And then you turn around, Kobe. You have to lower your volume because mom was trying to take her. I am, I am.

SPEAKER_02

Because I I did not hear her, I did not hear this exchange of agreements. Term of agreements for this bedtime thing. So I'm like, alright, well, she's gonna lay down for I'm gonna, you know, sit here. And then Bobby came in the room unbeknownst to me. I didn't recognize she. She's so swift. She's so swift. So I didn't recognize that when she came in and got in the bed, she that she got that she's like, because there's a part of my brain that sometimes tune her out.

SPEAKER_00

That explains why you have a little more downtime than me.

SPEAKER_02

My brain is able to tune her out sometimes. So I it wasn't until she was like, you know, hi. And I'm like, whoa, my ears is going off because now I sensor overload. What are you doing? What? I'm trying to sleep. And then I see you just laying there wide awake. I'm like, what are you doing up?

SPEAKER_01

Go to sleep. God said I am.

SPEAKER_02

And I was gonna put her out because you were like, oh, she's fine. She's fine. And again, there are times I I have to be mindful that I'm trying to protect you. Because I know that your motherness will allow her to invade on moments that you need to yourself. You need to rest. And you need to rest without there being an interruption. You need to rest without there having for you to have to perform.

SPEAKER_00

That's true. But I feel like there are certain moments where Kobe will take the hint and she'll be like, oh, okay. And I've taken naps and she just sat there. Oh, yeah, for sure. But sometimes it seems like there's a little more effort in her attempt to get me to like look. There's a higher expectation. So I'm like, okay. Even then I said, well, you know what, Kobe? At 5:30, mama's going to take her nap. So we got the next 15 minutes to do the story. So that was kind of my okay. As soon as it was 5.30, I rolled over. And then I heard my alarm. And Kobe just turned it off. So again, at that point, I feel like in the 30 minutes I spent with her, she still stayed there. Oh, she still asleep.

SPEAKER_02

You have been asleep for hours. And she sat right there next to you, unmoved.

SPEAKER_00

I didn't know that. I thought she probably would have followed you somewhere or been some. I didn't know. Now again, as long as she got the TV to watch or she will sit in the table. The lights have been. Then when I wake up, guess what she's saying? I'm hungry. Yeah. I'm like, why didn't you go ask me?

SPEAKER_02

She never came to see me once. Never came to see me once. So it's like, you, and because now I'm in my own space, I didn't go check on her once. I knew she's next to you. She's she's not moving, so that knew she's fine.

SPEAKER_00

She won't get in no trouble. That's it.

SPEAKER_02

She's sitting at you. I'm on the lights off TV on tablet on, and she's chilling.

SPEAKER_00

She was on her tablet, my alarm went off a couple times. And when I finally did get up, guess who else was asleep? Oh, I was out of this. So you never woke me up. I was like, You never woke me up. I was out of that. I said, wake me up at 6 30. I finally got up at 7. I look, I say no, he didn't.

SPEAKER_02

And he was supposed to wake me up. And I said I was gonna wake you up at 7 because I was like, nah, she just not laying out, and it's already 5.30. By the time she says, you know, it's 5.30, 106. By the time 6.30 comes, she's not gonna get enough rest. So I was like, I'll let her sleep till 7. Meanwhile. And then I got tired out of nowhere. I mean, it was like those slap competitions. Oh man. And sleep slapped the mess. Sleep slapped the mess out of me. It was like, I went from wide awake and it was like, bow, go lay down. I was like, oh, okay. So when I woke up and saw you knocked out, and I was sleeping good. I was sleeping good. So it just hit me out of nowhere.

SPEAKER_00

So But that's the example. I was basically like, Kobe will do that.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Like she'll be like, all right, Mama. Like, she she came up here to see the room, and she's like, This is mama and Kobe's room.

SPEAKER_02

Like she's like, automatically trying to invade and take your space. Which is why, again, that's why I want you to have your own space. Because when you're in there, I I I want her to even recognize if mommy's in the room, you can't go in there. You have to wait till mommy comes out. I if if if I'm here, now mommy's by herself and it's you and mommy, of course, go in the room and you need something. But if I'm here, you have to come see me if I see mommy. Which means you can't. Which is fine.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

I just know how to tune her out until she needs me. It's like I'm just gonna tune you out until you come in the room, and then I'm like, yes, what do you need? You know? But that's my little so that's what we were talking about as far as like parent. How about the break and not necessarily Yeah, about just needing breaks and just feeling overwhelmed.

SPEAKER_00

How how do I definitely have those days and I have those moments? Uh I don't think it's gotten to the point where I'm like, I shouldn't have had a kid.

SPEAKER_01

Okay.

SPEAKER_00

It's just more of man, this is a for whatever reason, that day, that moment, it's just like a lot. It just feels like a lot. Gotcha. And I'm just like, man, either I'm overstimulated or I'm really, really tired.

SPEAKER_01

Right.

SPEAKER_00

When I have those moments, or I feel like, man, I'm I'm juggling a lot. And I tend to have those moments when I have that feeling. Like if I'm mentally over, mental overload, I sometimes kind of feel like, man, this is a lot. It's a lot. And sometimes that happens, you know, your schedule just stacks up like that, and you know you're gonna drop the ball on something. And it's just like, man, I just need a moment, especially like if we have a bunch, like we're all trying to get out the house, and it's a time crunch or something like that. And I'm like, man, come on, mama, I need this, mama need that. I'm like, oh my goodness, then Luna, you know, she needs to go out. So it's just like sometimes it's I really do have that overwhelming feeling of okay, I can't do it all. But or like the nights where I know you have an event or you have to go, you know, shoot an episode or do a podcast, and it's me for the night. Yeah. So trying to navigate, okay, getting dinner done, and then once dinner is done, trying to get homework done, and trying to get her in the shower, and trying to feed Luna, and trying to take Luna outside, so she don't pee and poop in the house, and then it's just like, oh my, and then trying to get close together, and I gotta touch up her hair, and it's just like I still got my stuff I gotta get together for the next day. It's just like, oh my or like the late nights where we gotta go get groceries so we don't get home until six or seven. And it's just like you tapped from ripping and running all day, and then I gotta pull the 10% I got to kind of carry.

SPEAKER_02

Right.

SPEAKER_00

Carry us through the night. Again, like or like yesterday, where I get up from nap to find out you done fell asleep. So now it's like, well, let me get her something to eat for dinner. Let me get her a shower.

SPEAKER_02

Let me and even like even I mean, even like this morning, they feel like this morning we we had to get up extra early. We had to get to move in. Our day started super early, and we had to get the ball rolling. And of course, by the time you've wake me up, uh you're kind of already dressed, you've already kind of done some things. But I wake up and I'm kind of like, alright, let's get it, let's go. And then I can just see the frantic. As you are just pacing through the house, room to room, grabbing stuff, and I'm like, just focus. Get it, just stay, just keep moving, just keep moving, grab what you need. And I'm like, I got Kobe. And of course, you know, you're doing something. I come in the kitchen, you're like, I'm making toast.

SPEAKER_00

She said she was coming. And I'm like, I forgot you was gonna stop by the gas station. I didn't even think about it.

SPEAKER_02

I said, what are you making toast for? She said she was hungry. And you're just, you're like frantically. And I'm like, grab your stuff. Who about to toast? Screw the toast. Screw the toast, you know?

SPEAKER_00

And I have those moments where I'm like frantic because it's like I don't want her to starve either. Because she code again. That's all I'm gonna hear. The whole ride. I'd really like something to eat right about now.

SPEAKER_02

She's very vocal.

SPEAKER_00

So I'm like, but she's polite about it at the same time.

SPEAKER_02

And it's just like I'm like, what is happening? This is slowing you down. You're like, what's going on?

SPEAKER_00

And then it's like I'm trying to fill her water bottle, but you're calling my phone so I can find it. At the same time.

SPEAKER_02

Because you're frantic about the phone. So I'm like, well, let's solve this. I'm gonna call your phone. Then you're like, the toes are the toes, find your phone. And then you're like, uh.

SPEAKER_00

Of course, it was in her mind from when I was trying to wake her up.

SPEAKER_02

And again, you're moving so fast. So at any end, that I don't I don't think I I know some parents, they feel like, again, and they that's because they do it by themselves. Yeah, yeah. But I think even us doing it together, it still can be overwhelming.

SPEAKER_01

For sure.

SPEAKER_02

Because a lot of times we are doing it by ourselves. We're just trading off the amount of time you have to do it. So it's like, okay, I gotta, this morning, I'm like, I got Kobe.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

And that's a lot because I'm trying to get her pillow, I'm trying to get her car, I'm trying to get her to wake up and like in the car, I'm gonna put your shoes on. She's doing, she's stumbling like she's drunk, but she thinks it's like, oh my god. And then, you know, then we trade off, and so then it's like, okay, well, we make it home, and then it's like, well, she's on you now. And I got stuff to do. And so we we're working together, but we're still trading off the individual amount of the weight that we have to handle with having Kobe sometimes. And again, it's like it can be a lot, you know what I'm saying? And I I've always said I don't regret a day with Kobe. I I love having our daughter. I think she's been such a huge addition to our home as far as her personality, her energy, her welcomingness, her love, like her jokes. She she has the like comedic timing of a veteran comedian. And yet she does not know nothing yet about jokes for real. But her comedic timing is perfect. But I I do there are times when it is like really just like, oh man, this would be so much easier if I did not have to worry about Cobra. If I did not have to like the grocery store. Yeah, it's just like all of that, like the the amount of time I'm like, okay, Cope, we gotta get out of the car. Then she gets out of the car, and now she wants to like dance and do other stuff, stuff outside of like Kobe, come on. Then we get in the grocery store. She's like, Can I stand on the cart? Now she stands on the cart and then she wants to like play while she's on the cart. And I'm like, bro, I could have gotten in and out of this store so much faster without this kid. You know what I'm saying? Or just like I gotta be somewhere, but now I gotta, you know, drop her off at my grandmother's. Right. So now I gotta pack a bag for her, and we gotta go through what she has to wear, and I have to go through all these things with her, and then we gotta go to my grandma's, I gotta drop her off, then I gotta make sure I, you know, I'm not just dropping and abandoning, so I'm spending a little bit of time to like get her comfortable there and you know talk to my grandmother, and then I got it's like all this used to be a lot easier.

SPEAKER_00

And I remember like again when when before she started school, and you know, we had our work schedule was kind of crazy.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

And we would pack her up to stay with your grandma for a few days.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

That was all all weekend, and like every weekend, I'm trying to do hair, and it takes all day for me to do her hair. So by the time, you know, I finish her hair, now I gotta pack up her clothes for the next couple days for her to then go. And then, of course, I'm like feeling overwhelmed. But as soon as you y'all leave to go to your grandma's house, I'm sad. Like my baby is gone. I know, sitting there sweat boots. Like, oh my gosh, I'm just trying to french brain it this way, I'm trying to part it. Oh man, I gotta put beads on. Like, I'm trying to figure out how to preserve her hair for the few days. Because I didn't want your grandma, you know, be trying to do her hair. But I'm like, man.

SPEAKER_02

And you know, it's like, shout out to support systems because man, I'm my grandmother has come in clutch. And she says she knew it. Clutch. She has come in so clutch because of her willingness to just be available and and and really never say no. And and and always being um uh very upbeat about it as well. Never like kind of being like, oh, okay, my girl. It's like she's always like, yeah, yeah, like and again, and we we have done our best to not over abuse that, like even, you know, realize like, uh, yeah, we could use a break, but we're just gonna have to touch the wood. Let's take her, you know, Kobe with a sort of.

SPEAKER_00

You know, again, now that Kobe's older, she be wanting to go. And sometimes we have to go, you know what, Kobe?

SPEAKER_02

You can't let her give her a break. You gotta give her a break. You know, um, so yeah, it's just like, you know, but the support system has been clutched because again, like many of the the women in the video who were like single parents, that they don't have the help.

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

So it's like, I can only imagine if we had to really truly keep public a hundred percent of the time. It's like, uh, where do we get the break? Like Sunday, we went on our date night, and you know, we were even able to go out to eat afterwards, and you know, we picked her up around what, midnight, mid-12:31 or something like that.

SPEAKER_00

It was yeah, it was like 12 or something.

SPEAKER_02

So something. So, I mean, just that from let's say what seven o'clock if you count the event time starting, uh, but really like six o'clock. So it's like six good hours, like we had that break where it's like most people don't even get you know, one you know what I'm saying? So it was like support systems are such a important thing because it helps us not only make time for ourselves but also for each other, then for us to do other things, like um, so shout out to to my grandma for just her her help, but is there ever a time that like for parenting for you at least, do you ever feel well after seven years, do you feel less equipped to preparent, or do you feel that's a really good question? Or do you feel like you either have a a handle on it, like you got it, or maybe you found your rhythm or anything, or do you just feel like man, seven years in and I still don't know like what the heck I'm doing at all?

SPEAKER_00

Like man, I f I feel like it varies. Like, I feel like some days I'm like, alright, today was a good day, and then other days I'm like, man, I hope I didn't scar her today. Like I hope I didn't traumatize her today. That's me every day. I just and it's not like no abusive extreme type stuff, but it's just like, man, I was not sitting into this part of the extreme abuse and stuff. That's great. Well, I because I said scar her or traumatize her. Oh, yeah, okay, yeah. I just I was trying to clear that up. And nothing like that. Right. So as far as like we might have had a disagreement, and I feel like I didn't handle her emotions the best. Absolutely. Like, like stuff like that. Because again, Kobe is very clear. Well, Kobe, she doesn't shy from her emotions. No, and and she's gonna feel the happy ones just as much as you would feel. So her loves, her eyes are her lows. So it's like trying to navigate that and also control, she's her last child. It's affecting me as her mom. Because naturally, sometimes it's like she'll be like, Well, I just wanted to do this because of that. And it's just like, okay. Again, not trying not to rush her through the feeling, right? So, like if I have to pick her up from great grandma's house and on the ride home, she's just soaking. Right, she be so badly, you know, and it's like nothing I'm trying to cheer her up with is working.

SPEAKER_02

Man, talking that's not there. There is nothing more deflating than trying to pep your child up, and they just they clearly are telling you, just stop. Uh-huh. But it ain't working. I'm sad, I'm mad, and you look dumb right now. Because that's how you feel. Because boy, have I tried to make Kobe feel better in a moment when she was down, and I am sitting there like, wow, I feel real dumb. I feel like a clown performing in an audience of nuts. Like, she is not engaging. She ain't laughing, she ain't smile. If anything, she's more sad because she's just like, you're making me feel worse. Like, I'm like, I'm trying to be funny. I'm like trying to tickle her, and she's like, please stop. Like, I'm sad. And I'm like, dang, girl.

SPEAKER_00

And there are moments like again, I just I have to go back and apologize to her. You know, just say, well, you know what, Kobe, mama responded this way. Right. Because I misunderstood what you were saying.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

And if I had taken a little more time to listen, I would have heard you say this over that. You know, but in those instances, again, it's like some days, some things I feel like, okay, I'm good at it. Right. But there are other things that Kobe grows and changes over time. It's like, what? I thought I what kids do be shift.

SPEAKER_02

They be. And it's it's like, man, like, it's like even this morning, she was so dead tired. And she's she's, I'm talking about she, you I'm telling you, you thinking she's like, how many pints have you had, ma'am? Do the walk straight, touch your nose thing. How many fingers? Like, she's so sleepy and stumbling, and I'm like.

SPEAKER_00

But even that varies, like, I've stayed probably pep in her steps. And she only had like uh, especially, you know, again, when she hanging ain't got nowhere to be or go with great grandma, she be good off a few hours.

SPEAKER_02

She is her daddy's daughter.

SPEAKER_00

Like she be good. Two hours of sleep, she can't. I've seen her, like, sleep long.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah. And she still be like, it just varies. And that was the crazy part. You know, when we got to the house, like, she will sleep all the way there to your job. She slept all the way back home. Not in, I mean, I started McDonald's and everything. Girl never flinched. I'm like, people are gonna see this child later. I'm like, oh, and I enjoyed it. Listen, I I'm music up, I'm eating a McMuffin. Uh sweet tea. I'm over there enjoying it. And then as soon as we get home, I'm like, I know she has to be rested. And this girl is taking 10 minutes to get from under the cover. In the back seat, she's I can't, I can't.

SPEAKER_00

No, but I tell you, give this girl an Oscar because she reacting her buttons. I can't.

SPEAKER_01

I'm like, girl, take the cover off. I can't, like, I'm right.

SPEAKER_00

Help! Help! But it's the other thing. Sometimes I feel like, because you do that, like, sometimes the level which y'all be sleeping, even though it's a short period of time, it be so deep sometimes. And it's like, what is deep? How? And it's to the point where again, you don't have like awareness of where you are or what's going on to sleepy so when she's like, Hell, I can see her because it's like speaking and pulling the cover, pulling the cover over her while she's trying to get from under it.

SPEAKER_02

What are you doing? Hell girl. Girl. I say, Jesus. But I I think, you know, again, I never, I just sometimes it's like it's hard for me to imagine us without Kobe because we've had her longer than when we didn't have her. Like we were married, what, six six years?

SPEAKER_00

I think so. Or maybe it was five going on six, and that's when we found out.

SPEAKER_02

So we just well, 2014, 15, 16, 17, 18. She was born in 1950. Beginning of, yeah. So five years. Yeah. So yeah, so we we were married five years. We've had her seven, so she's been out longer than we. Our uh free single parents life. Um and so I think I look back and I'm like, man, the first of those five years went fast. Yeah, compared to. Second of all, oh, and now mid-podcast, who comes up? She betrayed Kobe.

SPEAKER_01

Did you put one in her case? Oh, you left her.

SPEAKER_02

What can we do for you, baby? Because we're in the middle of a podcast. We're recording. Oh, you could. What do you need? Okay, well, you might need to go lay down for a little while, okay? Go lay in your bed for a second. Just try to lay down, see if your stomach helps, okay? No, you cannot go in there. That is mommy's face. But lay down on your bed. Or you can lay in our bed.

SPEAKER_00

Oh, so well.

SPEAKER_02

Okay. And so, yeah, that's you know she tried.

SPEAKER_00

That's one thing about Moby. She's just gonna good or bad, if you say yes or no. This girl, she will still ask.

SPEAKER_02

Of course. She will still I like how she stood on the steps and looked at the door and said, I can go in there.

unknown

No.

SPEAKER_02

No, you can't. She's so and I love because she's trying to find a way to be like, hey, I'll be out the way. Right. It's still a solution. I'll be out your way. I just want to be in there though. I'll be in there in mommy space.

SPEAKER_00

Or like what you said this morning. He was like, Well, we're gonna be late. So if we're gonna be late, I said.

SPEAKER_02

Well, she said it. So what we're so this morning again, we're talking about this morning, how busy it was. Like we get back to the house, and because we had to take prayer sword, we we had to drive all the way out for it and come all the way back to the city. And by the time, you know, Kobe goes to school at 8, and by the time we made it home, it's already 8. So I'm like, we have to get you ready and out the door so I can get you to school in a good enough time. And there are times when, yes, we've woken up super late, 8 30, 8 40, 9 o'clock, and I'm like, we're calling it. It's a wrap. And Kobe, obviously, she, I don't know what time, she didn't even know what time it was. She had just spent five minutes yelling for help to get out the covers. So she doesn't even know what time it is. She's like, she's like, but I feel like, you know, dad, we we should like stay home because like we're already late. And you know how you say when we're late, like we just shouldn't go and we should probably stay home. And I'm like, girl, it is eight. We can make it. Get out the car. Like, let's go. What are you talking about? You going to school. And she's just like, okay. And I'm like, yeah, we're gonna go. Let's try it. Can't she go say it? I'd have commended for it. I commend her for it. I'd be like, you are and and in any other day where I felt like maybe I was just too out of it, I'd have been like, you know what you're at, home.

SPEAKER_00

Right.

SPEAKER_02

But you're going. Come on, let's go. Cause I'm up. And I'm going to get you there because I'm up. So let's do it. But she is. She's so she's so funny. She's so funny. Is there um what is the one thing, or maybe what are three things? I should say, but what are three things? What are three things that you feel you have learned from Kobe and parenting her that has taught you about yourself?

SPEAKER_00

Um, one that comes to mind immediately is not to take myself so seriously.

SPEAKER_02

Okay.

SPEAKER_00

Um, because Kobe, she's very playful, very lighthearted. Um sometimes in those moments I can sense where she's like looking like what's up with you. Basically, I'm like, oh. And then some like again, we could be talking. Sometimes Emmy trying to get her ready and telling her what to do, I realize, okay, I'm I'm saying too much at once.

SPEAKER_02

Like, and she that's the second one. That's the second one. Man, Kobe is so good. Cause she does that to me, and I'm like, Kobe, I I try not to give you a bunch of direct. I'd be like, this, this, and this. And she'd be like, whoa, whoa, whoa, I can't do it all at once. And I'm like, no one told you to do it all at once. I clearly said, go get your shoes, then your coat, and then grab your bag. It's just like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. You can't do all that at once.

SPEAKER_00

So yeah, I don't know if there's a term for that, but again, the first was like not to take myself too seriously, but also again, it's just like one thing at a time. Just take it one thing at a time.

SPEAKER_02

So she's helping you with your your ability to communicate.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Effectively.

SPEAKER_00

But also, again, not pile on so much to like just do one thing, right? Then the next thing. Cause sometimes when I'm telling it to her and she says, I'm like, you know what, Colby, mom apologizes. That was a lot. Jesus. That was a lot. Yeah. So it's like, nah, just take one thing at a time, not to take myself so seriously. What's the what's the um I would say again, not to be afraid of emotion. Because Kobe, again, she I think a lot of the times when she's in, I would say, I'm in quote unquote negative feelings where she's sad or frustrated or discouraged. I kind of have to beat her in that. And if I'm afraid to sit in that with her, I'm not gonna be of use to help her navigate it.

SPEAKER_02

Right.

SPEAKER_00

Um, so again, enjoy the happy feelings, but also don't be afraid of the the down feelings, if that makes sense.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Um, because again, we have to help her navigate through that in a healthy way.

SPEAKER_02

No, that's true. I think uh to piggyback off that, I think one of the things that she's helped me to understand more is to be she's helping me to be more sensitive.

unknown

Huh?

SPEAKER_02

The hammer to be sensitive. The what? The hammer. Like you yell at my wrestling name or something. Vince the hammer. Basically. Um definitely is helping me to be more sensitive. I guess it's a part of the not taking things so seriously. Like, she's helping me not to parent her so seriously.

SPEAKER_00

Where everything is I'm always a teacher, I'm almost to check or current.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, it's like she's I I'm learning to she's she's softening me up to being able to like be more attentive to how I'm saying things or how she's taking what I'm saying and making sure that if she's taking it the wrong way, then I must address that. Okay, I'm I'm communicating wrong. Not that she's interpreting wrong, which sometimes you can, but it's more so like how can I better communicate what I'm trying to say to you versus that. Um and two, um, I think she's helping me realize um how much I'm invested in her future as far as like she's helping me see that I'm very I'm that I'm putting a lot of my reflection of myself into her. What I mean is I'm she's showing me that and it's through like how I'm uh like for example. When I was telling you, like, man, sometimes it sucks that I feel like I'll be with her all day, do all this stuff with her, and then she'd be like, When are we gonna get money?

SPEAKER_00

When you told me that, I was like, no way. No way. Like, we will go to the place. We will go to McDonald's.

SPEAKER_02

I will give her everything she wants. Let her play to the placecape. I went to Walmart. Go to Walmart, go to Target, buy her a poster, and we have all this fun. And then she'll be like, so are we gonna go get mommy? And I'm lying. Hey, yo! What about your man? Like, I'm putting that work over here. Like, but I think it's showing me like I'm really caring about the legacy that I'm leaving behind for her. And I'm being, and then it's affecting me emotionally where I'm like, I I want to know that she that I'm doing good by her. And I don't think that I was aware of how much that mattered to me until recently, where I feel I'm like, are you proud of daddy? Do you like hanging with daddy? And I think obviously, I know she does, but the way children respond to things makes can easily make you feel isolated. Where it's like, she just prefers her mom. And it's like, I think that's not the truth. I think it's she has so much of me that she's like, I don't get enough of mom. So it's like, oh, it's not that you know, you're like, dad, I get so much of you. This is great. But I what I'm missing is all of this with mom, though.

SPEAKER_00

But that's the thing, like, if I like say she comes with me to the store or I take her with me to my mom's or whatever, she's saying, is daddy gone? Where is daddy? We're leaving daddy. We gotta wait for daddy. So again, it's just I think when you're not physically there, she knows something is missing. And she says, Well, where is daddy's daddy? Right. Is daddy coming with us? Right. And I'm like, well, no, not this time. Oh, okay, but she still will say it's because I think ultimately she's come accustomed to us going places together.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, and that's that's I think again, that's I think that's my third thing. Is that I like I told you when we were out Sunday on our day night, I was like, I've come to an understanding in a place where I am genuinely happy, and Kobe is helping me to see this as well. This is part of the parenting is as I parent as we parent together with her, I've come to understand how much I truly just enjoy us as a family, right? So, um, and so I think like to your point, she is used to us because we we do take Kobe with us everywhere. We do do a lot more family stuff. We don't just, you know what I'm saying, be like, alright, girl, bye. Like we just leave her. Like, we do go to the store with her, we go to the grocery store with her, we go to movies with her, we go, like we take her just about everywhere with us. So her favorite place is the hotel. The hotel that we rarely go to. I can't wait to go back to the hotel. I'm like, I gotta book a hotel or something. But these ones, this girl won't go to the hotel. So, you know, so I just think like that is her thing. Like, she just enjoys sleeping with us, she enjoys watching TV with us. If we're sitting together, she wants to squeeze in between us.

SPEAKER_00

And like again, we went last year around this time to uh see your sister. That was just the first family trip where she was old enough to remember and participating in the going somewhere.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

So again, just the late night drive of being up and then going back to sleep, because again, she was in the back seat.

SPEAKER_02

Right.

SPEAKER_00

And she had her blanket, she had her pillow, she was playing her tablet until she fell asleep. Because again, we were driving throughout the night to get there.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

So it was just again, those are memories. Like in the moment, you don't think about it or consider it. But I think that's stuff she won't forget. Like, she again going to the hotel once we got down there and just being in a new place. Yeah, she just taking it all in. She's like, all right, what a hotel. Yeah. Do we have to leave? Should we stay in?

SPEAKER_02

That hotel.

SPEAKER_00

And they didn't even have a pool. That's what I'm saying. We didn't even go to the pool, but I think that is one of the highlights as well. Why she wants to, she enjoys going. She just, it's just this new awesome place. Right. She just be looking forward to going to the next one. Or, oh, me and mama, we get to sleep in this bed. Daddy, you sleep over there. Like, she just loves taking it all in and what it means. And it's just like, she's so like, and it and then on that trip, we didn't have support. It was just us thugging it out. Yeah. And it was a wedding trip. So I had to get makeup done, and then you had to get her dressed, and I had to do her hair. So again, we was tag teaming that too, but it was fun. You know, it was worth it in the end.

SPEAKER_02

It was, it was. I think that um again, it's like I say, she I I don't know how we would function without her. Like now, before, because even when we before, and it's crazy because again, when you look at those five years, like we were just not, I don't think we even talked about kids for a life.

SPEAKER_00

I think we did, but it was brief. It was always like, okay, well, is this the year? And we'd be like, nah, don't push it back either. Yeah, we just would always talk about it like around our anniversary. Yeah. Our wedding anniversary. We'd be like, is this the year? You're like, nah, let me next year. Right. And then he come back around to the next anniversary. What about this year? How you feeling about it? Uh no, we don't push it back. Yeah, we just was while everyone else is getting pregnant around us, and we're like, all right. So we kept pushing it back. And then God was just like, enough's enough. Enough is enough.

SPEAKER_02

Don't play it.

SPEAKER_00

He took us out.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, but and even and even then, I think that I'm glad it happened the way that you it happened because you got pregnant around the same time as two of your friends, and you know, one was like way further along than you, and the other one was like right around the same as you. And you guys were the three of you were able to share that journey as whether sisters and women, y'all were able to like call each other or support each other, you know, while your feet swelling.

SPEAKER_00

She's like, Yeah, my feet swelling. Yeah, you would be.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, you feel me?

SPEAKER_00

Thank you, no. Because she would tell me, she like, Paris, I done took this, I done took that. She said, and it got to the point my doctor prescribed me.

unknown

Okay.

SPEAKER_00

And then it ain't touching it. I said, ooh, we that is that massive. And then I know there's like that belief that if you have a lot of heartburn, that means your baby has a head full of hair. Kobe had a head full of hair. What Kobe had that hell? She had that hell. Well, I was like, and wait, they could they tried to stick it to her head. They're like, this baby got a lot of hair.

SPEAKER_02

Man. It was such a crazy, crazy time, that whole that whole thing. But I think again, when you when we think about when she was first born, and like you're just like, man, what are you gonna do? What are we gonna do? You know, I remember us going home that first day, you're just like, oh my god, it's on us now. Like, it's real. Like the hospital ain't they ain't about to call us to check and see how we're doing. It's on us. They they are letting us walk out this hospital with a human life. And they don't even know I don't sleep right, let alone I'm about to try to figure out how to sleep with this thing.

SPEAKER_00

But those were good times. Like, I was on maternity leave, so I got to watch, catch up on the shows, and take care of her, and then when you got home, I got to talk to you and take a nap and then get up because you got to go to work. But we even leading up to that, like we would have the doctor Diet Pepsi's Diet Cokes. I don't know why that had us in such a joke hole, but we never bought a case of pop. We've never bought a case, a case of pop. We might have we might have bought like a two-liter.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah. But we never bought a pop. We never bought canned pop before. Never Kobe, and we never bought it after. At least not a case. Yes, we never bought a case. We never bought a case.

SPEAKER_00

It's something about uh I don't know Diet Coke that made us think that Pepsi. I don't know what it was. Was it Diet Pepsi? Because I remember the silver. I thought the silver can was coke. Uh-uh.

SPEAKER_02

Um maybe it was diet Pepsi. Either, listen, we and it's cracked. I don't like we was chugging them, chugging those diet. I'm about to go in the kitchen. You want diet Pepsi? Like we were just what was going on. I don't know what it was about them diapers, but we was drinking down in them. Downing them. And they was keeping us up. Yeah, that's I don't think it's supposed to work like that, but I don't know. Talk about how do you get through the first year of a baby crying every night and diapepsy.

SPEAKER_00

Drink them. Or I remember again waking up thinking I'm smelling to dreaming about food. But it was you eating food. Let's talk about it. Listen.

SPEAKER_02

Talk about you were asleep. I had everything you were supposed to have as a pregnant woman. I had the cravings. I'm like, oh my god. And I I was I was smelling the food. I wanted the food. Like I was determined. It could be four or five in the morning. I'm like, I'm going to the court. Like let it be the weekend. Yeah, you up. Oh, up and out. And it's like, my mind is like, I just want some chicken. And then I get there and I'm like, hey, let me get the double cheese brother and the chili cheese fruit.

SPEAKER_00

And that's what I'm smelling thinking about.

SPEAKER_02

Oh my god, I was.

SPEAKER_00

I blew up. I blew up.

SPEAKER_02

I wasn't the only one to gain. I blew up boy. Boy, boy, boy. So it's just, uh, it's so crazy, man. But I I think, all in all, when I when I when I hear women who are just like they they're struggling with being a parent, or they they just almost regret it or hate it or like like they love their kids, but they hate being a parent, or they like and I'm just like, I get it on some days. And I and I and I don't even say I hate being a parent, because I don't think I ever hate. I think it just it's a lot. Um, but I get it, you know, how they feel, how they can feel that way.

SPEAKER_00

Especially when again, you're the only person for this triangle. Man. You're the only you're the go-to for everything. At least you go to.

SPEAKER_02

Yes, and again, that's what I'm saying. We have a partnership and it's still hard some days. Right.

SPEAKER_00

So again, uh, depending on what you believe, it was never meant for one person.

SPEAKER_02

Oh, for sure. Parenthood was never meant for one person. It was you were never meant to raise kids.

SPEAKER_00

And again, I think there are some women, they just it just seems natural. Like it's no problem at all. But again, in any situation, it's like two sides to the spectrum where like me, I feel like though being the oldest, yes, I took care of my sister. Yes, I helped my brother. Yeah, it's I still had to learn though how to be a mother to Kobe.

SPEAKER_01

Right.

SPEAKER_00

Like it didn't necessarily just kick in. Like, I'm still the last time I had a baby before she was born was like two years. So I'm like, now I'm not old. How do I give her this bottle? How do I make sure how I'm feeding her? I'm not making her gassy, like trying to burp her, trying to figure out if she's getting like all those things. It's just like you still kind of have to like learn those things, but relearn. But yeah, I'm I'm like, I I commend the women who again are saying, I'ma stick it out and be responsible, take care of my kid. Yeah. But then I get that there are some women, it's just too much mentally, and then they end up cracking and breaking, and then unfortunately, it seems like in those cases the kids just end up in bad situations.

SPEAKER_02

But last question before we get out of here. Do you feel like the the mothers who say it's too much, and they decide to like either give their kids up to the system or maybe release that person, their children to a family member? There are people who obviously like bash parents for that because they feel like, you know, why give up your kids? You gotta stick it out with your kids, you know, there's damage in giving your kids away like that. For sure. Do you how do you feel about it? Do you feel like I I I've actually agreed and said I feel like that's what you should do. I feel like if it's too much and you can't handle it, versus crashing out on your kids by being, and when I mean crashing out, I mean like traumatizing them because you're so angry, traumatizing them because you're so stressed out, traumatizing them because technically when you get so built up, they're the first thing in your face that you can take it out on. Or, yes, harming your kids, as you see, women who have put the kids in freaks, put their kids in attics, put their kids in whatever. And because they were crashed out, they were stressed out. So I agree that I think as a parent, though I would want every kid to stay with their parent, and I think every parent should fight for that relationship with their children. I think, in the event of saying, I can't do it, I think that it is something parents should do, push like as a final short. Just give that kid away. Find if it's to another family, okay, you know, do your best to keep in contact or check on your child. If it's a family member, obviously, you know, you're gonna do that part as well. But when I think of the girl, you know, who uh, you know, a couple years ago had the whole thing with the kids, was left in the house for almost, you know, two, three years, you know what I'm saying, and um was fitting for themselves basically because this mother just did not want to participate actively in their life on a day-to-day basis.

SPEAKER_00

Um meanwhile, you know being fulfilled in other ways.

SPEAKER_02

For sure, which I'm sure was a response to the emptiness she already felt just having these three kids by herself. How do you feel about it? Do you think giving up children is the right way to go? Do you think there's something that's another way that could be done, or do you think that that that parents should just find a way to tough it out?

SPEAKER_00

Disclaimer. I'm answering from the perspective in life that I've lived up to this point. For sure. As I get older and maybe come into tasks with people who have different experiences, or I experience different this answer is likely to change. But answer today, I I think it is tough, man. It's tough. I think if that ends up being the decision you make, I would hope you have something in place to not then have another kid. Let that be the one and none. Don't then give this kid up to a family member or give this kid up for adoption, or again, some people they decide to, you know, end it all together. And again, I understand the logic on that too, depending on the circumstance. But I'm I'm saying, like, don't then just go out and repeat it. Gotcha. Like, do put something in place, take the responsibility, you know, to not just keep repeating this process. I get some people they glamour. Like, we saw another video clip of people that like glamorize or obsessed with being glamorize. Yeah, the whole life wanting to. You actually gotta take care of the it's like it's a it's a disconnect. But they just get a high off of being pregnant and carrying the child, and then once they have it, it's like that enjoyment lessens, and then they hurry up just to get pregnant, to have that high again. So it's like don't I would necessarily write and go to that, you know, extreme either. But again, if if you're in a situation where you're having to give up the kid, you can't be the primary parent, I would say again, I don't want to keep repeating that either, though. So now it's not just one kid, you got two, three that you're having to repeat this process with. Because granted, regardless if you know the adopted family is great or the family member is great, that kid is still gonna have to deal with that feeling of abandonment and not knowing why or understanding how come true. So I don't think you should just keep doing that to the kids. Uh because again, they the kids don't ask to be here.

SPEAKER_02

Right, right, right.

SPEAKER_00

And it's like again, it's just like the responsibility of the people that's doing the act that produces the kid. Okay. If you know excuse me, that again, you already feel like I don't necessarily don't again. Don't don't don't do what you can to prevent that from happening until you know that you know. That you know that you know.

SPEAKER_02

Understand. No, I feel and that's why I say I can understand it because you can't really can't take it back. I mean you you start.

SPEAKER_00

You can't take it back. Right, you you can, but you can't. I mean you can prevent it, but if you decide not to do that and go through the pregnancy up into delivery, there's no going back per se.

SPEAKER_02

Oh well, yeah. There's just I think that's why it's it's it's super important that people have healthy relationships with their baby moms or their baby fathers, so that one, both people can play a role in supporting each other, even from afar, right? I'm stressed out as a mother, I'm overwhelmed, let me call my child's father. Hey, can you take them for a while, maybe a month or two? Can you, so that I can, I'm I'm going through a light emotion. I'm struggling. I'm really struggling. And then as a again, with a healthy relationship, sure. Let me take my kid. Cool, I gotta, hey, fig, you know, get it together, you know, help us all as well. Whereas in when there's so much animosity between baby moms and baby dads, where it's just like, no, I'm not gonna help you. I don't like you. You know, look how we broke up, look how you've been acting since we had the kid. And now, yes, it's all on this one person, whether mom or you know, dad, but now I'm left with no help, no support, and and now I'm overwhelmed, and it's like, it's nothing else. Every year, it's almost like Kobe is so not the same.

SPEAKER_00

I mean the core of her, but there are other things it's like, okay, oh.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, but I'm saying, like, she's not the same as far as like every year she's learning so much more that it like what you got accustomed to changes. So it's like when she was just a she used to be able to just sit on, I used to be able to sit on the couch, surround her with blankets, and give her some snacks, and she sit there. You know, and she just watching, you know, uh um the show she word party. Yeah, even that. Like she used to watch word party, and then you know, they were babies, and like now she's watching Princess Pony in their high schoolers or something, and I'm like, what is happening? You know, uh, like like um the one guy we watch on social media, Derek Branch. Well, he's like, What do you guys think of this? Oh yeah, you know, like that's Kobe Now it's just what do you think of this? Like, so she is so she's different, but like you said, her core is there, but it's very um Like I said, it's just a new addition every time.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, like she has a birthday, she's into something else, or she's understanding something else.

SPEAKER_02

Like it's just yeah, she's she just had she has her own motivations now, like wanting to wear skirts, you know, and just like just wanting to just dress up and stuff. Like trying to I'm gonna give this on, and then I've told I've put clothes on the bed, coach wear this. And she comes in with a whole nother outfit. I'm like, what are you doing?

SPEAKER_00

With a backpack. I wanted to wear this, and I'm like her sunglasses in her backpack of her little trinket. Ain't nothing in there valuable, just her little her little toys. Random pencils. It's random stuff in her bag. Oh, it's it'd be random stuff, but it's a value to. Her if she wants to take it with her that day.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

I'd be like, okay, girl.

SPEAKER_02

Okay. Well, guys, that is going to be it for this uh episode of our pod.

SPEAKER_01

Um we appreciate you guys for you enjoyed what was okay.

SPEAKER_00

This is this is the random thought that came into my head while you were saying that. You know the show Two and a Half Man. Oh at the end of the show. I used to watch that sh as kid. And I love that. That happens sometimes.

SPEAKER_02

That happens all the time. Ash does this whether we are on the mic or not on the mic. She does this every day. There's a song in her heart every day.

SPEAKER_00

Nah, this is it. I'll be seeing a video on Instagram and TikTok. And they talk about this, and I'm like, it happens. You'll say something, and that word will make me think about a song, and I just gotta say that little snippet. You are a walking infomercial or something.

SPEAKER_02

A walking ad for something. Just that little snippet. Oh my goodness. A walking genius.

SPEAKER_01

Oh man.

SPEAKER_02

Well, guys, that is it. Um, and yes, we do hope you enjoyed the show. Um, again, you can follow uh this podcast on the maturity productions network where you can find all type of podcasts. Like the not very mature podcast with me, and my co-host Sheason Fierce. Uh the uh uh uh uh you know therapy in motion with King OJ. Um and of course, obviously this podcast here. Um and so we hope that you guys are enjoying these podcasts and tapping in with them. Um we will try to be a little bit more consistent with the frequency just because we don't want you guys waiting so long in between the episodes, but my god, we are trying to find the balance in life. Um, but yes, definitely give us a five-star rating if you guys are on Apple Podcasts, stuff like that, Spotify, iHeartDs, podcasts, all those other places. Um and of course you can follow me on Maturity Underscore Productions or Maturity Productions on Facebook or the Maturity Productions YouTube channel where you got tons of videos um from the podcast or from uh my movies or shows or music and things like that, so you guys can tap in so much content provided by Maturity Productions. Harris has a social media she does not use nor will she give out.

SPEAKER_00

So find me on everything she just mentioned.

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CHISA FIRECE

Host
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KING OJ

Host
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TREASURE

Host
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MATURE THE SERVANT

Producer