THERAPY IN MOTION | HAVING DIFFICULT TALKS | EMERGENCY PODCAST

KING OJ SITS DOWN WITH VINCE AKA MATURE AS THEY DISCUSS THE CHALLENGES OF FRIENDS DEALING WITH TENSION AND HAVING HARD TALKS. THEY DISCUSS BEING MISUNDERSTOOD, MISPLACED ANGER, AND SO MUCH DEEP TOPICS YOU DONT WANNNA MISS. 

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

What's that deal? We back with another episode of Therapy in Motion. I got my dog Mature with us today. What's the deal, my G?

SPEAKER_01 0:07

What's going on, bro?

SPEAKER_00 0:08

Shit, I can't call it. I can't call it. Uh well, you know, we finally got back around to doing this emergency pod. Yes, sir. Um shit, where you where you want to start at?

SPEAKER_01 0:21

Um, man, I think um we can start with kind of what we were talking about yesterday. You know, we well when we was off pile, we were talking just about how difficult it is for people to have honest conversations without there having to always be an altercation or a breakdown of communication or a failure of communication where people gotta fall out, people gotta beef out, just because even I was even talking to a friend of mine today and we were just talking about that, like letting people go, learn how to let that, you know what I'm saying, giving that space between people and be like, look, I'm gonna just have to love you from a distance, or I'm gonna have to send you on your way because I can't keep you in my my parameters of what my peace is. You know what I'm saying? Because you it there's a circle of peace around you, and it's either people that's in that circle because they add to the piece, or it's people that's in the circle and they disrupting the piece, and you gotta move them outside the circle. They too close.

SPEAKER_00 1:25

Facts, you know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_01 1:27

I gotta push you a little bit further out, you know what I'm saying? And and I think what we were talking about yesterday when we was just talking about like, man, like even as black men, black men can't even hold constructive conversations with each other without what are you trying to say then? What do we fucking in there? You'd be like, yo. So I feel like man, we can start there, man. Like, like, after, um, I guess I I actually it's just like after that the the conversation we had were, you know what I'm saying? We had an open eyes. How did you feel post-conversation about like yourself about the conversation for you and what that was like for us as bros.

SPEAKER_00 2:13

Okay, uh, so you want me to just dissect like the beginning. For sure, if you want to, yeah. Yeah. Alright, so basically, just us having uh creative differences, um I wanted to get out how I felt in the moment just because I'm I'm more hands-on as a as a human. Nah, like I let a lot of stuff slip out of my life by just allowing it to be whatever. You know what I'm saying? So I'm in there. I'm just like, you can't, so I gotta say this ahead of time, which you already know because we had the conversation, but I don't wanna not speak on it and then develop a disdain or a vibe that don't even have to be there. Like a hidden animosity. Right, a hidden animosity. Yeah, exactly. I didn't want it to get to that point because I'm just like, we can it ain't never been an issue for us to talk anyway. Never mind. So I'm like, you know what I mean? Let me just let me not overthink it because I'm feeling this way, let me just address it. But the thing is, only thing I was battling with was what it's usually like trying to express myself to another human being. No, for sure.

SPEAKER_01 3:42

For sure. Bro, when you said, I'm like, bro, I feel the same way. So I already know like that, the the anxiety of like, yeah. I know what I'ma say, but is it even for the person that gotta hear it, like, bro, is they gonna even get it? Is it gonna land? This is go 50,000 ways. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 4:01

So I'm like, damn, I feel this way. I wanna be able to be more hands-on as far as my craft go. I wanna, you know what I'm saying? Just be the man, you know what I mean? What I mean, but that don't mean you can't be the man too. But I'm like, I wonder if, bro, know that we can coexist. Which I know you do, right? But when you used to uh expressing yourself to certain people and they don't get that y'all can coexist, it had it bring you doubt. Like, what if it don't go that way? And I was just like, well, let me figure out how I could say this without it going, or being received the wrong way. So that's why I started off by saying, uh, you know, I appreciate the work you doing. It's great work. So it's just, you know, it's something, it's certain stuff I want to do on the creative side, and and it's views. You already been doing this for uh uh what over a decade, right? Going on too, right? So I'm like, it ain't like I'm telling you you don't know what you're doing. It's just this is what I want to do, and I I see a little bit of what you want to do. I see that direction. And I'm just like, well, I'm gonna just have to say it. Because if I don't say it now, it's gonna go down the middle and it's gonna build to something that might not have to become unspoken stuff, for sure. So I'm like, well, I'm gonna just have to say it now because it's never gonna be a perfect time to say it. You know what I'm saying? You can never about time. But um other than that feeling, after I said what I had to say, and you said what you had to say, and we spoke on us both having you know creative differences. But at the same time, we came to a common ground where it made sense. It's like it ain't it's never about not working together, it's just we both need to see, okay, how can we make this work? Right. Like that's my dog, it ain't like I'm like, man, hell no, let me uproot everything. I'm not just it's just okay, I feel this way. You see shit that I might not see, and it's like, okay, I'm hearing you out, but all in all, after the conversation, all the thinking was gone. It's like, well, damn, that's how I wanted it to play out, but I didn't know if that's how it would play out. For sure. So I feel a trillion times better before, you know, I spoke about it.

SPEAKER_03 6:42

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 6:43

So I'm like, shit, I'm glad that we was able to speak like adults and just not be, like, I don't feel no type of way now. Like I don't feel well, I do feel the way. I feel I'm I'm happy that I spoke on it. I was about to say plot twist. Well, like I do feel the way.

SPEAKER_02 7:01

First off, hey, plot twist.

SPEAKER_00 7:04

No, no, but I feel like it's no ill will towards you. So I'm like, I don't feel nothing negative. Like, I'm just glad that we got that out the way because I'm like, well, at least we ain't letting no feelings harbor and turn into something.

SPEAKER_03 7:19

Real tall.

SPEAKER_00 7:20

So yeah, I'm I mean, I'm cool. I'm I'm cool where we at with it.

SPEAKER_01 7:24

And it's crazy because most people, bro, like, I don't, it don't even gotta just be like business. It could be friendships, relationships, just like most people don't even the moment they feel something, instead of addressing it in the moment, like you say, you kind of sit on it, you sit on it. Even if it's not the good time, a lot of times people just be like, Well, I don't know if I'm if I'm tripping. So they but it's like, bro, just say what you when you had an open line of communication, but I I get like there's an anxiety to like having bad interactions with people. Yeah. So when you have so many bad interactions where it's like, I tried to be honest with this person and it blew up in my face. Yeah, I tried to be transparent with this person and they told my business. Yeah. I tried to, when you had those many bad like experiences, you like, bro, I don't I don't know who to trust, I don't really know who to tell, who I could be real with, you know what I'm saying? So then you start people pleasing or you start um, like you say, we was just talking about diminishing yourself lower, you know what I'm saying? And it just be like, nah, that's unnecessary. Like that, that, I, I if anything, we people like us, bro, like we can be the ones who I guess encourage people to step up their communication level. Yeah. So it's like, bro, it's not on me that you can't understand or that you ain't trying to listen. Yeah. Like, I should hold you accountable for that, not just like be like, oh man, I don't want no problem. Yeah. No, I'm I should put your feet to the fire. Like, why are you tripping? You know what I'm saying? Like, it reminds me of a time, bro. I went down south to, you know, see my sis and my pops was down there. We we ain't always had the best relationship, man. And he was, you know, he had said some real foul stuff, like some years ago that had, like, we was just non grader talking. Like, and so when I when I saw him, I was still standing on that same business. Like, I ain't talking to you, G, until we talk about what's been said. Like, if you want to talk about what's been said, we could do that, but we not doing nothing. Oh, what's up, man? Nah, not after we talk about what's going on. You know what I'm saying? So, yeah, you know what I'm saying? And and I ain't want no, like, I ain't want no argument. I just wanted a thorough conversation as like man to man, like, why would you say something like that? Yeah. You know what I'm saying? And so, um, but like in that real time, bro, like I could see like my pops were struggling with being accountable in the moment of a conversation where you gotta answer for yourself. Like, and being able to articulate what's been said. Like, even like just being able to hear what somebody is saying and then say it back. What what what did I say to you? And being able to listen and then articulate that back, like he was just struggling because the moment he ran out of words, it just went into emotion. Yeah. And then it was like, man, I can just up believe. You know, he started, he started tripping on other stuff. It's like, he like, man, you don't want me here, I'll just leave. And I'm like, bro, nobody telling you to leave. I'm telling you to talk to me. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? And he like, man, I we ain't gonna live in the pants. We supposed to be in the future. No, we go talk, bro. Like, and I can see him run, I can see like in real time he was running from a difficult conversation. Yeah. It's like, this is a hard conversation. You said something to your son that was, you know what I'm saying, out of pocket, you know what I'm saying? And whether you choose to remember it or not, vividly or not, we still gotta have a hard conversation. And I can see in real time, like his answer to hard conversations is if you don't if you don't just accept the BS that I tell you, then I just blow up to kind of like it's a it's a tactic to diminish the person he's arguing with. Yeah. And it's like, nah, bro, I'm not. I'm one, I'm not backing down, but I'm also not getting led into my emotion. Right. We gonna keep bringing back, bring it down. What's going on? You know what I'm saying? And so, man, in that kind of in that, in the midst of our conversation, and you know, for those listening, we were coming together about how to progress and move and further expand and help the growth of uh therapy emotion. Um, and like bro said, you know, we we come from two different viewpoints on the on the same bridge, technically. You know what I'm saying? You on one side of the bridge, I'm on the other side of the bridge, but we on the same bridge.

SPEAKER_03 12:14

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 12:14

You know what I'm saying? It was the same thing. The same thing. So um, and so I just thought it was like, man, when I got off the phone, I felt relieved, like, man, that's you don't normally get that.

SPEAKER_02 12:25

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 12:25

You don't normally get that, and you don't normally get that without even still feeling like, man, maybe bro probably still. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. And I still walked away feeling like, no, I don't think bro got off the phone. You know what I'm saying? Like, you can tell when you get on the phone with somebody, you kind of like, I don't know, bro, still might be over there. Like, but in that I felt real confident, like, no, bro, no, like, it's love there, we good, like that's. And not only have we both talked about different viewpoints, but in the same breath, we kind of also can hear and acknowledge, bro, we both want the same thing for each other. And it's like, that's even more encouraging because it's like, oh, bro, really want my best, and he knows that I want his best, and that's really we just trying to figure out the best, right?

SPEAKER_00 13:14

It ain't figure out how to build this conglomerate, you feel me, together. Like, we ain't gotta be, it's no, you know what I'm saying, I'm bigger than you, you bigger than me. It's like, hey, bro, let's go, we both warriors, let's go to war against the masses, not against each other.

SPEAKER_01 13:31

That's it.

SPEAKER_00 13:32

So it's, yeah, bro, it was after the conversation, it was laughter at the end, it was you know what I'm saying, it was jokes, all this shit. So it was like, it wasn't just, no, I feel this way, and you better understand. No, it was like that's crazy.

SPEAKER_01 13:49

That's a crazy phrase.

SPEAKER_00 13:51

You better understand.

SPEAKER_01 13:52

Hey, yo. They ain't say that.

SPEAKER_00 13:55

I'm like, oh but you know it's people that's like that. They can't. 100% they come off aggressive because they don't really know how to express themselves in a calm manner.

SPEAKER_01 14:07

What's the earliest, if you can recall, or if if you have a memory of, what's what's like the earliest memory you have of like an encounter that either created that type of like communication anxiety or or it just made you feel like, oh man, like people don't understand what I'm saying when I'm talking to them.

SPEAKER_00 14:32

Well, I can't say when exactly, but I could tell you that it was during my childhood. Like when you and it could be anything, you just expressing yourself as a child. Right, right. And people trying to shut you up constantly. Right. Okay. Nobody wanting to hear you, they over talking you. But then when you really, I think, recognize it, and it's it's a real uncomfortable feeling, is when you're not a child no more.

SPEAKER_03 15:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 15:00

And you feel that this is still going on.

SPEAKER_01 15:04

For sure, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 15:05

But you were so used to, oh well, I am a child, maybe I shouldn't be child's. In a child's place, yeah. Right. But now you're in the dark, yeah, and you still had a mindset of what they was telling you back way back when. So that's where it really started with me. And it's like I realized people didn't want to understand me though. Right. It wasn't that you, well, I'm gonna say it this way: some people don't understand, but then it was another group of people that didn't want to understand.

SPEAKER_01 15:35

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 15:36

So you come with your mind made up, and I used to still try to fight those battles of trying to help them to understand, but then as I like, and this has been in the last, I say, five, ten years. I just really been, you know, molding myself mentally to just not care too much about what other people think and all of that. So it's just okay, you don't want to understand, that's cool. Right, I can walk off and I'm okay. And I'm like, damn, that's sick. Like, you really stuck in that mindset and think it's okay. Like you come and premeditated for real. Like you just you don't even have a reason to be premeditated other than you just want to win against me and leave. Right. You think that's a dub because you out talked to me or something. It's like, but you didn't comprehend nothing. Like, what did you really learn? You really supposed to, every encounter, you're supposed to gain something from it. For sure. So if you didn't gain nothing other than uh a fake dub, like you know what I'm saying? What is that really doing for you? Yeah. I think that's like for me, I remember, I think going, it's one of two things.

SPEAKER_01 16:55

Like, I remember as a kid one of the times I remember when like not being understood, or even just realizing like a breakdown of communication just is like it could be so fucked up is when kids used to lie on you about stuff. And they are either in more of a position to be believed by the adult, or they just the circumstances fit perfectly within the line, or you know what I'm saying, and then you and on the other end, you yourself is like either I'm not good with words yet, because I'm still a kid, or I don't even know how to explain to this adult that this person is lying. And so you like, do you not see, like, and of course you getting in trouble and you trying to explain your point, and obviously adults don't want to hear it. It's like now you ass will be you just like, bro, I never even told y'all on my side. Like, man. And I, you know, and I just remember being like, bro, like, this sucks, like not being able to, or or even if, you know, people do stuff where, you know, let's say, you know, uh, I just want a bad attitude, so now they go and they, I just wanna cuss. And you know what I'm saying? And you like, no, I didn't. But they like, yeah, you be, you do be all bad, and you come here. And you like, bro, what y'all don't even understand? Like, what? Like, so it's it'd be one of those things where I realized, like, bro, okay. And then I remember, and I think we might talk about this on on a former pie. Like, you know, when I was going through a lot of my stepdad, like calling my mom and being like, look, like going down at the house, and she be like, I'm at work. You know what I'm saying? And you just like, oh, you know what I'm saying? Like, this, this, this, the, the failure of communication, of like, I need help. Like, so it's just in those moments, you kind of I I think the anxiety of like asking to talk to somebody about something serious and not knowing if what I'm gonna say is even gonna be validated by that other person.

SPEAKER_00 19:08

Yeah. You giving me PTSD right now. Bro, you just spoke on some shit. I I forgot about this, but now that you brought it up, I got some people that I gotta find their address.

SPEAKER_02 19:26

Oh, find their address.

SPEAKER_00 19:31

Look, I used to go to uh a school in Brightmo. Okay, it was called Harding, right? Yeah, I know Harding. So now that you bring that up, that's where it's turned.

SPEAKER_02 19:44

Bro, you didn't unlock the key.

SPEAKER_00 19:51

Bro, I swear to God, so I was just telling my OG this the other day. One of the things that happened over there, I had this teacher. I I think his name was like Mr. Callahan or some shit. I can't remember. It was I was in third grade, bro. Okay. He used to have a uh a little MM thing. What you call them? Where you with the candy on the inside, you put a quarter in, you twist it, then. Oh, uh a candy machine.

SPEAKER_01 20:18

Okay. Oh, yeah, common sense. Yeah, a little candy machine. I forgot what they used to. Not vending machine, but yeah. Yeah. They used to call them little candy machines or whatever, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 20:27

Yeah. So he had one of them on a desk. So what we used to do is you answer a question, right, you get some MMs. Okay. Me being me, we watching Rugreps this day, right? So this the orange tape for the people who don't know. The orange tape. Yo, the VHS boy. Yes, sir. Yup, this when the uh they had put the VHS in the TV. I thought that shit was so out code.

SPEAKER_01 20:52

Bro, it's in the TV. It ain't separate.

SPEAKER_00 20:56

The TV already jumped to the movie as soon as you put it in. Man, it's it's a couple of movies and shit that I used to be on with that shit. But anyway, to stay on point. Bro, he uh stepped out the class for an extended period of time. So I'm thinking I'm about to sneak up to his desk, click the little candy machine, and I'm good. I do it the first time, nobody catches me. Bro's still out the room, so I'm like, I'm about to go back up there for a second time.

SPEAKER_01 21:30

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 21:31

Wrong idea. One person seeing me fucked up everything. So I go back up there, they like, if you don't give me some, I'm telling on you. So I'm like, all right, well, I'm just keep getting, you know, a little bit. Because by this time, more and more people seeing me go up there so getting more attention. Man, but my mind ain't clicking. The more MM's you get, the lower dropping. So by the time he get back in class, that bitch is halfway. He instantly, who came up here and woo-woo woo, the whole class snitched on me. No, everybody with the fingerprint. He just wasn't directly. Straight hoes, I swear to God, bro. That was an instance, bro. He tried, I felt like he was about to attack me, bro. I took off running, bro. That shit felt like a movie. You know little banisters? It's like two, three floors, bro. I jumped on the banister and slid all the way. Bro, bust out the side door, ran all the way through the alley, all the way to the crib. It's dogs barking. I'm feeling like them boy, the good old boys on my ass. It's dogs barking. Yeah, get his ass. I'm hearing all kinds of shit. I ain't really hear that, but it sounds like. He's just in the hood, the whole man coming alive. Swear to God, bro. Uh get to the crib, my OG. She like, what you doing out of school, really? I'm like, oh yeah, we had a half day. I'm like, either way though, she probably she had to find out because I had to go back to school. Right, right. That was one instance. The other instance, this one hurt my heart, I ain't gonna lie. Okay. I was in second grade. I was smart as fuck on the spelling, bro. I used to love spelling uh spelling uh bees and shit like that, spelling tests, all that. So we had like a spelling beat in class. You win something every spelling beat. Okay. This one in particular, one of the kids in the class, he was, you know, fucking up or whatever. This OG came to the school like since he's been acting up. He goes with Goldberg costume. Whoever wins the spellin' beat, get the Goldberg costume. Okay. I win the spelling beat. Easy. Easy. Easy, I win. I knew I was gonna win it. Especially once you wear the Goldberg, man. I won it before that. So I'm like, when I found out that's what it was, I said, oh hey, because I was excited. Right. Before it's like I was cool about it, but I wasn't as excited because the prize wasn't a Goldberg costume.

SPEAKER_01 24:21

Right, for sure.

SPEAKER_00 24:23

Bro, do you know we went out for recess after I won the Goldberg costume? And because these other kids didn't like me, they lied and said I punched a kid in the chest that had a hole in his heart. What? I'm like, hey, how? Ooh, me? At that point, I ain't never even been in the food fight.

SPEAKER_01 24:47

Like, what the fuck? What? Was you wearing the Goldberg outfit? Bro, no, I didn't even know that. Bro, I He hit him in the heart.

SPEAKER_00 25:01

No, bro, I didn't even, it didn't even get to go into my messing yet. Like, I was supposed to got the shit after we left school. Right, right. But when, you know, the bail ring. No, because they lied on you. Because they lied on you, I gave it to the runner up, bro. Oh. Sick as hell. Sick as hell. And I couldn't prove it. It's like, man. What you wanna see? Like, how do I prove this shit? Like, and it was like everybody came against me. And that's kind of how I was growing up, bro. Right. That's that's really how I was. It's like the majority. The popular vote won.

SPEAKER_01 25:38

For sure.

SPEAKER_00 25:39

Every time. The popular vote won. So I'm like, what the fuck? Like, but I'm not gonna try to fit in with some people just to get the popular vote. It's like if you don't fuck with me, you just don't fuck with me. Like, I'm not about to be like y'all in order for you to fuck with me. I never understood that. I'm like, well, I'm dope as hell. The people that's in the popular vote, y'all weirdos for real. Like, you know what I'm saying? Like, motherfuckers be doing some weird, real weird ass shit nowadays, bro. And then be swept under the rug because of the popular vote.

SPEAKER_01 26:15

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 26:16

It's like, well, this is my man, so I ain't gonna hold him accountable. But we're gonna bash this motherfucker for just like this, when people be doing little weird shit with kids and shit, right? Mm-hmm. People will hide this person or hide the fact they're doing this, right? But then criticize the next man that might have not had something available for his kid's birthday in the moment. You feel me? Bro, they'll bash that man, but you got a whole freak of Zord over here. You don't want to say nothing about dog.

SPEAKER_01 26:53

Yeah, yeah, bro. Nah, that just you just gave me PTSD. Bro, and I I think we I think we might have had talked on this or we had touched on it like way, way back. We was like, oh yeah, emergency powder, whatever. Yeah. Because that's bro, that's the same thing, bro. I had uh, you know, a really close, close, close friend of mine. Yeah, you know what I'm saying, and like did so much for this person, you know, went on my way for this person, helped this person. And their kid, basically her her daughter had lied, it was like, oh yeah, you know, I had touched her and all this other crazy stuff, bro. Like, came with this whole story and everything, bro. And instantly, like, my this person who I was close with just like turned their back on me, was like, you know, F you, blah, blah, blah, all this other stuff. And I'm like, first off, you telling me that you literally have caught your child on, uh, I can't even count. You know when people say numerous, like, it's not even numerous. It's so much more numbers than numerous. Like, you caught this child of yours lying so many times that it's almost unsurprising when you like you can't almost barely take anything they say for face value. Like, because it's that many times they didn't got caught. And I'm talking about the lies range from the simplest of shit to like the most extreme shit. Like, like she had just told me, like, you know, she had stole, her daughter had stolen some perfume and was spraying it in the classroom. The teacher, you know, got on her for it. And her daughter told her, like, no, mama, it was some other girl perfume. It wasn't mine, that wasn't me that did that. So her mama went up there, went off on the teachers, the whole, you ain't gonna be with it with, just to find out that it was her daughter. And that she had stolen the perfume. That shit crazy. And it's like, so in this moment, in this most extreme case of the story being told, you believe in this kid. Even then it was like the people who she be around. Yeah. That's like her other friends that she take her daughter around. I'm like, you you saying out of this with those some weird mothers over there. Man. And I done, I done, and it's crazy because you know, like you say, instead of focusing on these people who really are weird, you taking all this energy towards the most non-weirdest person in your life. Like, so it's just like, bro, it it was it was heartbreaking just to even one be accused of something like that. It was heartbreaking to lose a 15-plus year friendship like that. Because I've known her since we was 15, so, oh yeah, over 15 years. And then, you know, it was heartbreaking that even the the girl herself, bro, like the stuff she goes through as a girl, like the stuff her mama exposes her to, like multiple relationships, multiple dudes, and females could she buy, like the her mama smoke, her mama drinking from her, her mama didn't, you know what I'm saying? All this stuff where it's like this kid seeing way more grown than they post to. Then she was using uh my YouTube and seeing the history of the stuff she was watching on YouTube, like videos about, you know what I'm saying? Like they were like these little mini-movies of of kids um like going to hunting houses where not going to a hunted house, but the movie is like a girl fell in love with a dude who got killed by gang violence. And so she fell in love with his ghost. You know what I'm saying? Or this girl then got abused by these kids in school, and like now she goes back as like a hitman against these kids. Things where I'm just like, this is dark stuff for even as entertainment, like it's still dark because it's just like, hmm, you know what I'm saying? So it's one of those things, man, where you look and you just be like, bro, people be so quick to focus on something like, oh, again, this fabricated lie, but then it's like, look at your actual life. You know what I'm saying? Look at the people you actually surround yourself with, and do you, are you not even you don't even hold these people accountable for the stuff that you see them do, let alone the stuff you do in your own individual life. And it's just, man, it's one of those things I've learned to, when we talk about that circle of peace, bro, like, cool, let me move people out the way, bro.

SPEAKER_00 31:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 31:58

Like the headaches, the people that just don't, and that's why I was so grateful for our conversation to bring it even back, because it's like we had a dope conversation. There was like, and it, and it wasn't even like much to really combat as far as thoughts. It's just like, right, oh, that's how you feel. Cool, cool. Hey, look, this is what I was thinking. Cool, cool. Now it's like, like I told you, I said, bro, I have even more respect, more admiration, more, more love for a brother who's like, and I think that's when most people's friendships get tested. Mm-hmm. It's the moment we don't see the same. Because a lot of times what's making us cool is we see the same. We think the same, we like the same, this, that, and the other. It ain't until you hit that first or second or third we don't see the same, where it's like, now we gonna test if I really put you or not. Or if or if me and you having differences is what's split us. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. So to even go through that and be like, oh bro, we Gucci. Like, I've had anxiety of talking with my friends about horror stuff like that, and being like, dog, if I talk to bro, man, it's probably gonna be a rap. Yeah. I'm probably and and not and and and not being scared, but like, bro, the anxiety of like, then I'm gonna have to grieve a lost relationship. Facts, facts. I'm gonna have to grieve losing somebody, all cuz if I would, I just open my mouth. If I would have stayed quiet, this we we can be friends for another 40 years. But if I if I gotta speak up about how I truly feel or what I think or whatever, this might be the end of it. And then now you gotta grieve that loss or all those memories. And that'd be tough, bro. But I was grateful that, you know what I'm saying, that wasn't our case, and no, nor did it I even feel like that was gonna be the case. Oh, yeah. But just the fact that it didn't have to be, and it didn't even get there, it was just like Yeah, it was uh uh it was 0% on a level of turmoil throughout the conversation.

SPEAKER_00 33:56

That was just we both heard each other out, and we both still uh had the same mindset on if you would have been tripping on me about it, it's like well, you I just don't need you around. And if I would have tripped on you about it, it's like, well, I just don't need you around. You know what I'm saying? Like, because that's a conversation, like, why is it so hard for people to have conversations? Even if it's just you disagree, like I love the fact when I I found out you could just say, okay, I agree to disagree. You feel me? I started using that all the time because I'm just starting splitting that m well. Agree to disagree. Man, picking up my food, yeah. Say 2009. Well, let's agree to disagree. I want to pay you $15.

SPEAKER_01 34:51

Your total was $225. I agree to disagree.

SPEAKER_00 34:56

But no, it's the real shit, bro. It was just like the conversation needed to be had. It showed that we both are on a a uh level of growth that most most not. Most not, for sure. And don't even care to get there. Especially for young black men.

SPEAKER_03 35:16

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_01 35:16

Cause I is bro, it's bro, it's it's so many young black men out here, bro, that can't communicate without guns being drawn, fish being, nigga start pulling up the pins. What the? Yeah, what you trying to say then? What you what you trying to say then? Cause what you trying to say then? It'll be like, bro, I'm saying what I say. What you mean? What am I trying to say? Like, and it's crazy, bro. Like, I don't, I, and I hate that for our generation. I hate that for even our race, bro. But it's like, people don't understand, like, not just black people or black men, but like you say, people in general. Yeah. We can disagree and be cool. Yeah. Like, it's like, it's crazy. I just heard this story. My man's just on the elevator. Dude and his girl get on the elevator. They must be hot for passion. They just start kissing in the elevator and they going at it. And then walk into a movie scene. You know what I'm saying? They going at it, and so then they walk off, and my man's like, the dude that was just awkwardly standing there, he's like, man, next time, you know, save it for the room, man. Yeah. And dude just fired on wow. Beat him up. Just beat it.

SPEAKER_02 36:37

And it's like, crazy. Huh?

SPEAKER_01 36:40

Like, bro, you can't, first off, I would have laughed at it. Like, yeah, you know, my hey, my bad, bro. You know what I'm saying? Or if I really was offended, I'd be like, man, and just kept going. The fact that you people can't even take a disagreement of stance, like, he feel like you should've waited for the room, bro. Y'all, y'all done went full rated in the in the elevator. Like, but it's just like people just automatically snap. I was at the gas station a couple days ago, and it's a it's a lady at the in front of the counter talking to the dude. And my man's waved me up, like, come on. So I get ready to start playing. I'm like, let me get such and such on pump one. And she like, so you just go cut in front of me like that? I'm like, oh, my bad. I'm like, bro, why you made me cut in front of old girl like that, bro? She like, no, I'm just messing with you. I'm just messing with you. No, you good. She, I'm like, oh, she like, I'm glad you laughed at it, though. I'm like, yeah, I just took it as a joke. She like, no, because you know, people be, I say, no, for real, cats do get offended for real. Like, they would have, they would have cussed you out for even talking to them. Being would have cussed him out. Like, I'm like, bro, I just looked at it as if if you really was in front of me and I just cut you off, I would have jumped. Go ahead. You know what I'm saying? Like, I don't see nothing wrong with being corrected. I don't see nothing wrong with being instructed or giving criticism to be like, hey, you know what I'm saying? You done did, you know, you do you done cut in front of me or whatever. So I'm like, okay. And she laughed at, but it was one of those moments where I'm like, bro, people do be so sensitive, like, that people just aren't willing to talk, bro. Right. Communicate healthy. Right. You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_00 38:24

So nah, but see, for me too, the thing was it was it wasn't just the conversation. It was more so to the fact that it never, we never got out of character when we was talking.

SPEAKER_01 38:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 38:43

Like nobody started yelling at the other ones. Right. Nobody started cussing out the other one. Right. It was just a conversation. Like it was just what it was, and then there was a lot of people. But we both speak loud too.

SPEAKER_01 38:56

Yeah, but we're passionate. That's why we're passionate. And most cats inner, not inner, um, I'm sorry, not the inner, but most cats um misinterpreted, yeah. Misinterpret that to be like, bro, who who you who you yelling at? Or like, why your voice so red? You know what I'm saying? And it'd be like, I'm a passionate person, bro. I speak loud when I'm passionate, and not even passionate, like I'm I'm trying to passionately be against you.

SPEAKER_00 39:22

Yeah, it's just emphasis on my words. That's it. That's it. And it ain't that I'm talking passionately so you can believe it. That's just who I am.

SPEAKER_01 39:31

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 39:31

So it's like, and I even said that, like, just so you know, I'm just passionate with my words. Only reason I even say that because I done had times in the past where I'm talking passionately, and people thinking that I'm trying to out talk them or I don't know, like trying to holler at them. I'm like, no, like this is me. I've been. Well, they be like, what you so mad for?

SPEAKER_01 39:57

I'm like, bro, I promise you I'm not mad. Facts. I'm just passionately talking, like, there's no anger there.

SPEAKER_00 40:04

You know how many times I done heard that? You mad? No, I'm not. If I'm mad, I promise you're gonna know I'm mad. You gonna this ain't bro, you gonna know. This ain't that. I know Bruce Banner, and I know what the hulk looks like. Two different people, bro. Exactly. That is crazy. The shit that go through my head when I'm mad, I don't need that around. You don't wanna hear that. You want me to say that stuff. The shit that might come out, I'm like, and I'm not even saying that to glorify that side of it either. It's like, but it's just I'm working on that for that to not even come out. For sure. So for when it does be that where people would judge it and be like, yeah, you and it's only a select skew, but it'll be like, you mad, you mad. Do you want me to be mad? Is that what it is? Because I'm really not, you know what I'm saying? Like, I just express myself differently than you might.

SPEAKER_01 41:01

That's it.

SPEAKER_00 41:02

So, but yeah, bro, it was like for me, just that whole part about not even just the conversation, but the understanding part of it. Yeah. Where it was like, okay, we both got our shit off. We both said what we had to say. It was no bad energy throughout the entire conversation. Um, we came to a common ground. We got shit in the works for the future, the present and everything out of the conversation. Yeah. Because I'm like, had we not had the conversation, you might not know. Well, of course you ain't gonna know. You don't know where I'm even thinking of going. And I don't know where you're thinking of going. We only see what we're doing in the moment. In the moment, right. So if I'm not in your uh presence, you might think, well, this is all he wanna do is this.

SPEAKER_01 41:51

Right.

SPEAKER_00 41:51

It's like, well, I got other ideas, but I'm putting them together right now mentally. I'm trying to have a complete product, and then, okay, here you go. But because we had the conversation, it's like, okay, well, this is my thoughts and where I'm my vision on where I want to go. And you telling me, okay, well, this is my vision and where I want to go. It's like, okay, well, let's meet right here.

SPEAKER_01 42:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 42:18

This is over here, this is the common ground. Let's let's holler at each other at the common ground.

SPEAKER_01 42:23

You feel me?

SPEAKER_00 42:23

And that's just what it was.

SPEAKER_01 42:25

That's it. So that's real, man. I and I think most, I don't, I think people's friendships, man, like, most people don't even allow their friendships to be tested like that. Right. You know what I'm saying? Like, a lot of people try to play it so safe and be so non-confrontational that it's like when when y'all finally do have a moment, neither one of y'all ready for it because there ain't been no previous work. You know what I'm saying? Like, I can even see, bro, just off that conversation, that even in the light of either one of us being truly pissed off at the other one for whatever reason, the other one of us would have the common reason and the care to be like, hey, bro, it ain't that. You know what I'm saying? Like, bro, remember. It's me, nigga, it's me. Like, you know what I'm saying? Like, yeah. And so it's like that, that just lets you know, like, when it's real, like that, that there's a certain level of protection too there. Cause it's like, bro, if you, if I ever misunderstood you in a way, you already know, like, bro, don't even, we didn't been here before and we didn't worked it out, so I know we can do it again. We might even let me take a couple days, let me woop, but bro, and I done came to a common ground. We can figure this out. We can do it before we can do it again. You know what I'm saying? But I don't think most times when people hit those walls, it's the first and last time. They ain't never had no chance to, you know, they see the sides of each other. They're like, I ain't never seen this. Yeah. Or they don't understand each other enough to be like, oh, bro, pass. That's why he he loud. I know he's not talking me crazy. He just loud. Because that's how he's talking, that's how I talk. You gotta know your friends. Yeah. I don't think people be knowing their friends for real. Like to know they like habits. You know what I'm saying? To be like, oh, I know how he thinks, I know how he talks, I know how he I understand him. So when I'm getting information from him, I'm not interpreting it through my lens. I gotta interpret it through his lens first. Yeah. So I know where how it's coming. Then I know how to receive, and then I know how to give it back because I know what words might trigger him. So I wouldn't be like, like you said with uh the one dude was like, man, you act like a pussy. Like I wouldn't say something like that, knowing that that's gonna trigger, bro. Even if that's again how people like, that's just how I talk. No. Even when I'm taking information and I gotta give it back, I gotta think about how to say it to the person that's how would they hear, what would what do they receive? You know what I'm saying? My girl, she don't, she not too keen on like cussing, like like when we talk it, even when we debate it. So I know I have to consciously be like, let me not say some cuss words. Yeah when we debate. Even though I might be like, bro, that's bro, that's bullshit. You can take that shit and go. That's bull job. You know what I'm saying? I gotta be like, you on some punkleberry right now, you know what I'm saying? This is jive turkey. You know what I'm saying? I gotta come up with words, like, man. Because I know like if if I'm trying to get her to hear my side of the message, I gotta say it in a way that's gonna be receivable. Yeah. So it's like, bro, that be the real, you know what I'm saying? Like, people just don't, they don't do the work within their own friendships to know their peoples. Yeah. And then, you know, they don't allow that stuff to be tested, bro.

SPEAKER_00 45:53

And yeah, and then to use common sense too. Like, so my thing is this your creative is based on your baby, which is your network. Right. My baby is based on my pod. So it makes sense that we would be both be as passionate about our shit. You feel me? Right. So it's like, okay, let me hear what bro gotta say though. I'm not coming in here with with uh like premeditated. Like it ain't like, I ain't hearing nothing dog gotta say. I ain't trying to try for that shit. You about to hear this, and then I'm out. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It ain't that. It's like, because my thing is, it's still great work. So I'm like, okay, we still cooking regardless. This ain't, we need to have a conversation so we could branch off. It's only we branch off if we just can't come to a common ground. Right. But it's like And even then, that's not bad.

SPEAKER_01 46:53

You get what I'm saying? Like, yeah, people be thinking that like, oh, we ain't working in war. Like no, bro, not at all.

SPEAKER_00 47:02

Like then be on every pod.

SPEAKER_01 47:04

Yeah, mature ass said, I was working with that nigga. Was working with Matrix. What happened? I thought you was on the network.

SPEAKER_00 47:12

Yeah, I was. Nah. Had to do my own thing. You know, niggas don't be wanting to work.

SPEAKER_02 47:24

Hey, your butt in it? Man, Mile and Roy and T you know.

SPEAKER_01 47:34

You fire both of us, we're gonna start our own.

SPEAKER_00 47:37

Man, but that's real. Yeah, bro, but I mean, I just think most people need to try to be understanding.

SPEAKER_01 47:47

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 47:48

And not just feel, because you can feel a weight, that don't mean you're right. It don't mean you're wrong either, but it's like weigh the pros and cons, talk it out. What you want, what's your views, how you feel. And but I don't think a lot of people can have these conversations without feeling attacked to the point they gotta start arguing.

SPEAKER_01 48:10

That be the part that gets me is like, what would you what why do you think people be so like feeling attacked? Like, what do that? Like, like I just said, there's never a point where even if you was blowing up, I'm not gonna be thinking, like, yeah, bro, must hate me. Nah. Yeah. I'm just gonna be like, bro, I bro, something got said now, bro, pissed, and I just gotta figure out how to reel it back. But I'd never be like, nah, nigga, he just said this, nah, I'm about to trigger. Like, nah, like, I don't know why people be getting triggered so easily in conversations where they are being either criticized or um given advice. Because sometimes it ain't only be bad. It be somebody trying to just keep it a buck with you. Yeah, emotional intelligence.

SPEAKER_00 48:57

You know what I'm saying? Yeah. Emotional awareness, yeah. Not being able to manage your feelings and thoughts. Not just feelings, but thoughts as well. Cause a lot of people can't do two things at once. So it's either I'm gonna manage my emotions or I'm gonna manage what I say, but they can't do both. So it's like, okay, well, you say such such. So I'm gonna say this, and I'm like, it's a war of words. So it's like, but why does it have to get to that point? You don't even have to get to that point for it to be that. Just express yourself. That's it. Yep. Express yourself. If you don't control your mindset, your mindset will be controlled by everything that's around you. Everything that's you that you consume, or it's consuming you. Yeah, that might be the problem is you being consumed and don't know it. And drugs. I mean, let's just be real. Drugs, bro.

SPEAKER_02 49:58

It's just how you said it, bro. He just he said all that neat stuff. He's just like, and then sometimes drugs. Like, facts.

SPEAKER_01 50:10

No, that's real. That's real, bro. That's so real, bro. That's it, and it's like, I think too, man, what it is is is how we raise our kids, man. Cause these kids, we, every adult is coming from a kid place. You know what I'm saying? A kid experience. Yeah. And it's like when we, you know, shut up, don't say nothing, don't want to, you know, kids trying to talk, I don't want to hear it. Shut up, don't, blah, blah, blah. You know what I'm saying? Ain't nobody trying to listen to what you talking about, you know what I'm saying? It creates a paradox where you're you're desperate to be heard. And so you grow up feeling unheard. Your teachers don't want to hear nothing, what you gotta say. Your parents don't want to hear nothing you gotta say. The law don't want to hear nothing. You you talk to a cop, oh my bad man, I was trying to. It's like I went through a yellow light one time, bro. Right here at the corner of my street. I was driving, and I I it was green. Um I looked down to grab something, and as I'm going up, I see the yellow turn red. So in that quick instance, it just happened. I'm not thinking about it, but I saw the cops behind me. So I'm like, yeah, they about to pull me over. They pulled me over. He like, come on, bro. You just gonna run that in front of me, bro? I said, I'm gonna be honest, bro. I'm and I'm and I'm being sincere, like, bro, it was green. I looked, I made sure it was green before I reached for what I was looking for. That's why I did it. To look, okay, green. Let me grab this thing real quick. And as I look back and I'm coming under the light, I saw it turning yellow to red. I said, it was an honest mistake. He like, bro, come on, G. Come on, like, come on. You ain't see the light, bro. You ain't see the light. I'm like, I ain't gonna lie to you, bro. I'm telling you, the real, like, this ain't even like I know I ran through whatever you thought was yellowborn, red, red, whatever, bro. I'm telling you, it wasn't that color when I was looking at it before I reached out to grab something. He's like, bro, all right, alright, bro. Let me just let me just see yourself, bro. I'm like, alright, you know what I'm saying? And in that moment, it's like, bro, why do people always just have to assume that type of energy in any conversation? Whereas like, why I gotta be lying? Just to be like a convict in every situation. You know what I'm saying? And so I think when kids grow up with that type of nobody believes you, you always trying to get over, you always lying, you always, then when you get an adult, bro, when people start challenging you, you so desperate to feel that conviction of a win. Yeah. You like, I'm gonna argue you down. Especially when people put that energy on you. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Where if that cop was trying to belittle me, oh, you lying, bro, and I'm like, nigga, I ain't gonna lie. What if I gotta? Nah, I'm trying to combat back. I'm like, bro, I ain't, I'm not gonna argue with you. I'm gonna let you believe what you want to believe. I know what I believe. We don't even have to try to be in the middle. We just can let, like you said, we agree to disagree. Yeah. Do whatever it is you feel like you need to do at this point. Right. Because at this point, you just wasting our time. Because you got a job to do, and I got somewhere to be. So let's let's get our let's get our interaction over with. Right. Whereas, you know, people grow up, bro, and they they had that, I've been silenced for so long. Now I'm an adult, and you go to a job and somebody say, hey, you can't wear those types of pants here at the job. You, the fuck you mean I can't wear these pants, these months, that you gonna buy me some new ones? You know what? And it's like, bro, you don't have to win every conversation, every argument, bro. And you and I both know where from such sad location in which we both used to work. You know what I'm saying? Like, you we both know like the the antagonizing conversation that didn't happen from some poor some uh superior to to to understudy, where it's like, bro, who who got a lie about coming back late from lunch? Who got a lie about taking uh uh an extra 15? Who got, yeah, I lit a cigarette and I smoked another one? Like, I you know we saw you. Okay, yeah, like how many times have I seen you do it? Like, what are we talking about? Like, yesterday me and you did two of them back to back and you ain't had no problem when we were outside. Now all of a sudden I do it by myself, and you like, yeah, you can't be doing that. Yeah. Like, so you, but it's those antagonizing conversations where people start to feel, man, I gotta win this conversation. I'ma one up you. I'ma just be like, bro, I see why people be triggered. I I can understand why people are triggered. And it's sad that those type of things are what people are truly experiencing. Like, while I'm a guy got peace and I'm like, bro, we can agree to disagree. For somebody else, this live, this conversation is everything to them if they can win it. You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_00 55:33

It was just crazy. Yeah, no, I feel you on that one, bro. But for me, I think too, when it comes to those type of situations where people are silencing you for so long, when you finally just you get over it, it's like shit. I'm out to prove this shit to you. But but the thing is, you don't realize that you now in the uh area or in a space of overexplaining yourself. Yeah, oh, that's a good one. Yeah, so I did that for too long, bro. Every time somebody didn't believe me, I felt like, damn, why you don't believe me? Well, I'ma prove to you that this ain't I became a lawyer, unlicensed, but I'm like, I'm gonna win this case. Yeah, because why are you trying to convict me of some shit that it ain't me? Yeah. But the thing is, yeah, while they trying to convict you, they don't need no. I I mean, what the fuck is that? They don't need no what? Evidence. Evidence. They just coming to convict you. I have no evidence for sure. Yeah, I don't even need evidence. And they don't even want evidence. Yeah. If if I find evidence along the way, hell yeah, that's a cool. We we got a dub here.

SPEAKER_01 56:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 56:58

But we are coming through collectively to convict you whether we got evidence or not.

SPEAKER_01 57:04

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 57:05

Yep. And so you find yourself overexplaining year after year after year. And it was so crazy, bro. When I realized that I was too bad at overexplaining, I was talking to a lady at this job site, and she was, um, this was before I had even got the job. I can't remember what it was that I was telling her. She was asking me something. And then I just gave her an explanation, but then I tried to say something else. She like, you don't have to overexplain yourself.

SPEAKER_01 57:38

Man, and bro, and when people hit you with that, yeah, the feeling you feel of like saltiness, like, I mean, I didn't feel like salty. Where I was just like, oh damn. Like I am, like I when they said it, I realized I was doing it, and I'm like, damn, I probably feel stupid. Facts.

SPEAKER_00 57:57

Yeah, facts. But a lot of people take these moments the wrong way too.

SPEAKER_01 58:03

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 58:05

So I just didn't care. I mean, not that I didn't care. It didn't affect me in a negative light when she said it. I just thought about it like, well, yeah, I I did overexplain it a little, or I was about to start overexplaining it too much, and I'm like, damn, I still do that here and there. But it's it stems from that. Just from being silenced, just from not really being able to get your shit off when you know you in the right. For sure. You know you in the right. It's like, that's the worst feeling though, when you know 100% like you in the right. Yeah. And then it's either one or a group of people that's adamant to prove you wrong.

SPEAKER_01 58:49

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 58:50

It's like, wait, why are you so adamant? Like, why are you on it like that? Yep. You about to get extra pay to prove me wrong? Like, did they promise you something? Right. So it's like, come on now, why are you getting off on this?

SPEAKER_01 59:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 59:10

And a lot of people do that where they it seemed like they really, like they won a championship or something by coming together and defeating you, even though you were innocent. It's like, damn, like, y'all gotta be sad individuals to even, you know what I'm saying, take it to this level. To just constantly bring it back on, yeah, let's come through and make some shit up, bro. Let's come through and just don't let him. Let's make him feel stupid, basically. Right. Or her, for whoever it is, let's make her feel stupid. Let's, you know, but I don't know, bro. All in all, I just think people need to practice being better all around all the way around, as far as just the mental side of it, the verbal side of it, and the comprehension.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:07

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:07

Because uh, you can't have one without the other. Right. So it's like you gotta, I could listen to you, but then I don't mean I comprehend what you said. Then I might start letting shit fly out that you know what I'm saying? It's like, bro, where are you coming from? Like you all over the place right now.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:23

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:24

Or I could be not listening, but I comprehend what you said, but I'm still not really listening to what you're trying to tell me, though. For sure. I can hear bits and pieces and just start going off on that. Well, what about when you said it's like, bro, come on, man.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:41

Exactly.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:41

Like, where are you going with this still?

SPEAKER_01 1:00:43

Exactly.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:44

So, yeah, bro, I I just know people need to do better. And even like with that one situation you said, um, I had a similar situation where I was doing uh public transit. Okay, and I had a passenger. She asked him, soon as she got in, I'm bro, good vibes all day, every day. Like, I don't never ain't no weird shit going on, never. So she gets in the car. As soon as she gets in, bro, she don't even really sit down yet. She like, before we get to where we going, could you stop me at McDonald's? I'm like, yeah, that's cool. So we on our way. I'm like, oh, um, is it one on the way though? Because I don't really know like exactly which route they about to take me. So I'm like, shit, is it one on the way? She like, um, yeah, I'll let you know when we get closer. I'm like, alright, cool. So I'm on the phone with my cousin still. We just chopping it up. We get to this one uh McDonald's and shit like that. She get her food. So they send me a message like, you know, you been stopped. Is everything cool? I'm like, yeah. The dude who get the ride for her called me. He like, yeah, say y'all been stopped for a minute. Um, I'm just trying to see y'all straight. I was like, oh yeah. So he like, can I speak to her? I'm like, yeah, I gave her my phone and everything. So he said the same thing to her. I hear him saying the same thing to her. Never once did he say nothing like out the way, like he was concerned outside of that. Right, right. So I finished the ride, I dropped her off at a hospital, and later on they, you know, kick me off the platform. I'm like, what the hell? Like, you know what I mean? So they finally tell me, they like, yeah, somebody they tell me one of my passengers said that I asked a minor for an oral. My nigga, do you know how pissed I was? Bruh. I'm like, why in the fuck out of all people? I mean, I wouldn't ask no female at all, because that's just weird as fuck. You feel me? Yes. But I'm like, why would y'all say it was a my I mean, but I see why they did it, but bro, don't play with my name like that. So you can get $30 back, my nigga? Do you know I got kids? I got a daughter, nigga. Do you know I my I have my own life, nigga? That I like you putting this type of smut on my name is insanity, bro. Like, if you if I really said this, where is the police report? Hello. That's the first thing you should have did, goofy. Like, why you ain't why you ain't hit up the police and say, yeah, the driver said, woo, woo, woo. Why you didn't do that? So your only thing you wanted them to notice is that I said that so you can get $30 back? You didn't want to prosecute nothing. And it's so crazy, bro, because I was already fighting a case in the midst of this. Yes. So I'm like, I'm fighting a case, and then this some extra shit that you trying to throw in, you know what I'm saying? Yeah, yeah, you add into my adding to my look.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:44

For $30 though, is what's so crazy because it's just like you can't be down that bad. Even if you is down that bad. Like, tomorrow coming. Like something can happen for you tomorrow. Like, you ain't gotta get it back today though. Like, that's so crazy. And then again, like you say, you know, you know, obviously you gotta say something really out the way for there to be enough of a reason for them to even like, oh, you know, sorry about that, here's your money. Yeah. But it's like, bro, you you could have said I tried to make a pass or something. Like, anything, but like mom asking for oral is crazy. And that's what that's why it was like for my my my friend who, you know, I had stand with me and her and her and her daughter with not like, bro, the amount of times of years and the amount of times that I have picked your kid up from school, took them to McDonald's, dropped them off at places, they added. Night. And ain't never in all these years you've never gotten a report of anything. Nah. And because, and the crazy part was, her daughter was like stealing out my house. Like, she was stealing out the crib. Like, and at first, I was trying to be cool, like, hey, you know, that's like, you know, your kid, I'm not like, hey, bro, your son did this. I'm gonna let you handle that. I'm not gonna talk to yourself. I'm not gonna be like, hey, no man, I'm gonna come to you. Hey, bro, your kid did this, bro. I'm just letting you know. You know what I'm saying? Handle that. But if you like, all right, I'll handle it. And if it keeps happening, I nigga, nah, I gotta say something. Right. Because this, now this my shit, this is my house. Like, right. It's one thing to be like, all right, bro, I'm gonna let you. But if after so many times they're not listening to you. Right. Okay, well then let me say something. Especially if you going to work. Right. Oh, I'm not about to wait for you to get home to, hey, bro. Or I'm not about to call you at work every time. Hey, bro, this happened again. Bro, at some point it's like, all right, bro, you do you trust me to be a solid parent and an adult? Okay. Then I'm gonna say something to your kid. You know, I'm not gonna disrespect your kid. I'm not gonna be like, you a bitch ass little boy. You know what I'm saying? I'm not gonna do so. In that sense, it's like, I'm not gonna disrespect your daughter. Yeah. But I am gonna speak as a firm adult. You're not about to keep stealing my house. My eyes is on you now. Every move you make, I'm about to critique you. And I'm gonna clock it. Just so you feel that pressure of knowing that you ain't about to just move through my house freely no more. Right. That offense got her so mad. And that's the scary part for me. It's not even that you lied on me. It's that because somebody was willing to critique you and hold you accountable, you was willing to lie like that. Man. That's more scary. That that type of that just somebody trying to be a legit parent or guardian over you, and you didn't like the way somebody guardianed you, that you was willing to throw that person in a position where I could have been in jail. Facts. I could have had a record, I could have had all this, all because you just didn't want to be told what to do. Facts. That's more scary. Facts. That you came up with that idea. Oh, this is how I'm gonna get him back for talking to me like that.

SPEAKER_00 1:08:32

Facts. And it could, it could, that those situations could have potentially, potentially had us both on that list. You feel me? And I'm like, for me, it's not even the fact that you just said it, it's the fact that how it's received. Man, because a lot of people would just say, well, I know you as a person, that's not the type of person you are. Exactly. But why is your name in this though? Exactly. What did you do? You didn't, you probably didn't say that, but what did you do?

SPEAKER_01 1:09:04

What did you say? Exactly, bro. Because you can't be, you just can't be completely innocent. Right. You can't be completely absorbed of something. And it's like, yeah, I can. Right. Facts. I can. I don't have to have done anything. I gave this girl a ride home. Right. Took her to McDonald's as as the customer asked. Right. Now, you know what I'm saying? That's the type of stuff that makes you be like, you going to point A to point B. Nah. I don't even want to I don't want to come off like that cool driver that's willing to, you know, maybe get an extra tip because I took, I did an extra stop for you. Right. Now you that's where I say good people get turned bad. That's where warm-hearted people get turned cold. And then people wonder why. When you meet that person down the road, why they so standoffish, why they so rude, why they so cold, why they so mean. It's like, bro, they done got done wrong when they tried to be generous, loving, and compassionate and working with people. All those people done push this person into a corner where now they they they done became isolated in the cold. They don't want to do nothing for nobody. Because they can't afford the risk of letting that happen again. You know what I'm saying? And so that was the same thing. It's just like, bro, I'm just looking like, why would I ever? I got a daughter of my own. Facts. So not only would you put me on the list, that would potentially harm the relationship I could potentially have with my own kids. Facts. So now I'm out of not just work or whatever, and now I got legal fees, court fees, I got a record. And I also somehow gotta be 15 feet with visitation with my kids. You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_00 1:10:52

Can't pick them up from school no more, nothing. Can't take them to the park. None of that. You damn near can't do shit. And it's like, bro, come on. Like, how is you, how is you even cool and it be our people? Yes. That's why people gotta stop saying that's always the system, the system, the system. For sure. The system plays a part, but we play a bigger part. We rather fuck each other over than do the work to come together to defeat the system. We be helping the system. Exactly.

SPEAKER_01 1:11:22

We be feeding each other to the system. Exactly. Like, it's like Hey, what you just said? We feed each other to the system. Man. Hey, what you just said? We feed each other to the system. You feel me? Like, no. Cause that's facts, bro. That's fact. Like, it's bad enough we all feel like we fighting the system. It's bad enough when you look over and it's a nigga chugging niggas into the system. And feeding the system so he don't go in it himself. That's crazy. That's crazy.

SPEAKER_00 1:11:59

Man, that's some of the realest shit that I done heard, bro. We feeding each other to the system, bro. But that's some of the realest shit I done heard, bro. Because that's really what's been going on. Yes. We sit here complaining about all the shit that we don't like, but we contribute to it. Come on. Come on. More than they is. Yes. They give us the utensils and the tools and shit to do it. Yes. But we pick the shit up and instead of using it to our advantage, we use it to our disadvantage.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:30

Bro, we I mean, and it's just awesome, like going to the most basic of basic stuff. It's like, bro, when you look at gang, street hood issues, we were we recruit, we're recruiting young kids to go out and sell dope and move guns and do, and then when they get thrown in the system, we like, oh man, they trying to hold us down. Or they get out, now they kind of they a felon, they can't get a job. See, the system don't want him to try to get better. No, bro. What about my man that gave him the gun and told him that he can make 50k a week moving this powder? And now he he fed him to the system. Facts. He threw him to the ghost, like to the wools. What you talking about? Or it's like this one girl. I was just watching this video, bro, and I watched these from time to time where people get caught for stuff by the police. This girl went into the dealership, tried to buy a Range Rover with fake papers and all type of stuff. When they busted her, she like, these dudes told me to do it. These dudes, they was selling me I could get a car and they was gonna flip it and then they was, and you could tell she really didn't know what she was doing. Like, it's one thing with a mastermind get caught in their own thing, and you like, oh yeah, they got they got you. You could tell somebody fleeced her. Like, hey man, if you do this real quick, all you gotta do is go up there with these papers, and then once they sign off for it, you good. You done fed her to the system. Cause you done got her thing, and she could probably make a quick couple dollars or whatever, and now you done fed her up to the system. She's going to jail while y'all probably around the block watching, like, dang, they done booked it. But we feed each other to the system, then we get mad at the system for hating on us, or we mad that the system is prejudiced towards us when it's like they wouldn't even see us. I guarantee they wouldn't even see us half the time as much as they see us if we wasn't feeding each other to it. Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_00 1:14:39

And then now we recording the shit we doing.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:41

We recording the process of feeding each other to the system. We recording it and then telling people like that's what you, that's that's cool. Breaking to these people's houses, we about to film it. Oh, all them girls that broke into that lady's house over the little ashes and all that stuff, tore her house up, spreading the girl ashes, her mama's ashes and all that stuff throughout. And they recording it. Big get it, girl. Y'all, y'all are even being told to record what y'all do for the system. Cause somebody told you, yeah, that's what being cool is, is going viral with your fight video or going viral with your killing video. And now they got stuff on you already. You they ain't even gotta work. I I'm sure, bro, I I probably should go into law enforcement. Cause I'm sure all you gotta do is put your feet up. Nah. Cause you ain't even gotta work. Facts. You ain't gotta, you, you, I watch Lawn Order, they like they going to different places and talking to people.

SPEAKER_00 1:15:40

They on Instagram.

SPEAKER_01 1:15:41

Let me look at these videos. Nah. Let me look at these videos. So, it's just sad, bro. We wouldn't even be in prison. We wouldn't even be on probations, we wouldn't even have convictions and felonies and warrants, and if we wasn't feeding each other to the system, or if we weren't feeding ourselves, bro. Facts. These dudes out here like, bro, I ain't had no L's in 20 years, but you done you done drove and lost five cars. And now on the sixth, when they finally done booked you and took you to jail, now you gotta sit down and do some time. And you talking about, man, they hating on me. No, what about the five times that they took your car and let you go, and you should have gone and got your stuff? Nah. You know what I'm saying? It's like, bro, we either feed ourselves or we feeding each other, and then there's a 20 to 30 percent where they they come and they just get us.

SPEAKER_00 1:16:35

Right.

SPEAKER_01 1:16:37

But we went from running from the plantation to running to the plantation or telling cats, hey bruh, uh, the north is that way, and you sending them south. Man. Hey. Hey, bro, which way is which way is Michigan? That way. And you going to Tennessee. Man. And you wondering why you done crossed the gun line and they like slave them. What? Old dude over there running to Michigan by himself. Like, man. Bro, we either we we went from running from the plantation to running to it, bro. And it's sad, bro. It's sad, bro. Cause like you say, like, man, my man's put that charge on you, bro, and now you gotta fight that. The money you done lost, the time, the bro, not, and even on a humane level, just the emotional stress of it all, bro. Like, cause as a black man, bro, being accused of anything remotely foul, bro, it's like, that's what that's one thing that's from my girl, like, there's a few things like as a black man, you just don't want kind of put on your name and then share it with a community. Yeah. That's being gay. I don't care what they say about people with gay rights, as a black man, yeah. As soon as people hear the dad, it's a different energy than a white man, then a black woman, then a white woman, then an airplane. Everybody else will get love or a pass or understanding. They might get some backlash, but there's no greater trial than being a black man than being.

SPEAKER_00 1:18:17

So you know. There's already criticism just being a black man. So all that extra shit is just toppings. Toppings on topics. We the pizza, and then it's just toppings. How many you want? Black, oh, child support, oh, job ain't what it should be. Oh, the car ain't what it should be. He needs to be making six figures. He's more and more, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:40

You just touch somebody, you touch kids, you man, you and I'm just and I'm just talking about from back in the day. It used to be as a black man, you don't wanna, you don't wanna be a bum. You know, a man whore. You don't wanna be a you don't wanna be caught to touch kids. Stuff like that is like, bro, you we can't play that stuff with as a black man. You you you rolling the dice every day, like, please don't let me.

SPEAKER_00 1:19:08

But you know the bad part about it is the climate that we live in, too, that you would even put that type of shit in the atmosphere because they went and got Bill Cosby from the times when he was little Bill. Yeah. They went back fucking 60 years ago talking about he slipped a perk in the bitch drink. How? How you know he slipped the perk? The girls that I'm uh uh that I've been around throughout the day and seen, they bringing the perks and the this and the that and they put them with the perk in their own. Man, so it's like, how did it become they love, and and from what I heard to be true, they was loving being off Coke and all that extra shit, man.

SPEAKER_01 1:19:55

In that era, yeah. So how 60s, 70s, 80s?

SPEAKER_00 1:19:58

Right. So how was he in trouble for them wanting the party? Man. So, but I ain't saying that's right if he did it and they didn't know. I'm saying for the ones that this is, they came for this and.

SPEAKER_01 1:20:15

You saw you saw what it was and you participated now that there's a woman, now that again there's a woman who was victimized. Right. You trying to run your bag up and be like, let me throw my name in there. Right. You didn't get victimized. Right. You was begging Bill for a third. Right.

SPEAKER_02 1:20:33

You was like, another one, Bill.

SPEAKER_01 1:20:34

Right. While this woman, she probably did get victimized on, you know, whatever Bill was feeling himself one night, whatever. But and that's the sad part again about sometimes we throwing ourselves to the system, bro.

SPEAKER_00 1:20:47

And I just I don't fuck with that, bro, because I'm like, don't put my name on that comedy, don't put that type of shit on my name nowhere. And so I had hit up the um investigation side of shit, and they telling me that they gotta, I forgot how they worded it, but no, I hit up the people, the customer service side of shit. They said I gotta go back to the uh investigation side. That's what so right now I'm still just waiting on them to get uh hit me back with the feedback and all of that. Right. But bro, I'm pressing charges, bro. You can't put that type of shit on my name and think. Like, I don't, that ain't cool to me. Like, how you gonna say some shit like that? You affecting my cheese, you affecting my mental, you affecting a lot of shit right now. Facts. I'm already going through life, and then for you to put some shit out there like that, and you ain't said shit, like I could see, I'm like, so if if I said this, how did I say it?

SPEAKER_03 1:21:52

Right.

SPEAKER_00 1:21:53

If I said this, what did I say before this? Because I had to say something before this. You don't just come out the blue and just say, Right, can I get some hair? You know what I'm saying? So like what was the lead up to this? Right. What was said after this? Did she decline it? And then did she feel comfortable and call you? Like what was she hoping to ride? It's a foot, exactly.

SPEAKER_01 1:22:18

You know what I'm saying? Why she why she just didn't feel the way if y'all went to the McDonald's and maybe you offered it while y'all in the McDonald's, she done felt the way it was a conversation back before. Why should she just hop out, call somebody? Hey, this this trippin'.

SPEAKER_00 1:22:32

Right, or we came to plenty of red lights. Plenty red lights. Why you ain't jump out at the red light? And oh, I forgot to mention this part. She was never even a minor. That was what's even worse. Even worse, yeah. Like, you gonna say that I asked a minor for whoop whoop whoop, but it wasn't even a minor, and I didn't say it. So it's like, bro, what is you on?

SPEAKER_01 1:22:56

Man, it is bro, it's sick. It is sick. The way people, bro, will the way people will comfortably um manipulate and and deceive a situation for their own benefit or gain without caring about the repercussions of your fellow man. Like, there's certain things that you that there's like when I was going through that situation, I was talking to my uncle about it, and my uncle was like, bro, why you ain't call me and tell me that was going on? I said, because there's repercussions behind calling you. I know that. I call you and not furniture moving, streets is moving. Like, what do you mean? That's why I already know. I I I I I mean, I don't don't play with me. I can call and things will move. Like, but I don't want that. That's why I didn't do that. Because, bro, if I call you, I couldn't take it back once I sold you. Facts. So it's like, but that's me thinking about my fellow man, which is if I'm in my fellas, I'm like, oh, you gonna lie on me? You gonna put this, you gonna try to put a case on me. Man. And then I call somebody that once I call, I can't take it back. Even if I'm not mad no more, and I just be like, bro, you know what? Hey, just stay over there. I'ma stay over here, peace be wiggly woo. I can't do that now because somebody coming for you. I can't take that back. It's rap. But thinking about my fellow, I think about my my choices. I think about if I gotta sit in some court case and they be like, did you call him to go do such and such? Yeah. Or if he didn't got booked, now my uncle gotta go to jail, because he didn't got booked for, and I'm thinking about him, like, I'm not just thinking about myself, I'm thinking about everything that it that's connected to my choices. So to see people make choices, and it's like, did you even think how that was gonna affect my man driving? Facts. What if, oh, what if, what if you file your uh your your your grievance lawsuit, and now she gotta come under, you know, the law for a witness, obstruction, because she gotta come and give a testimony. She minding her own business. Man. She like, why, what, why, you know what I'm saying? Do she even know that that happened?

SPEAKER_00 1:25:18

That's what I was thinking too. I wonder if she even know.

SPEAKER_01 1:25:21

So imagine if she gets, you've been served, you gotta go to court for she, huh? Man. It's like you don't even think about how this affects other people's lives, bro. Like, even like, like I said, her daughter saying that, like, she sitting there lying, and it's like, you, you not even thinking about my daughter. Mm-hmm. You thinking about how you didn't like me uh uh correcting you and you come up with this crazy fabrication, you're not even thinking about my child. What about my child? What about what about my wife?

SPEAKER_03 1:25:53

Right.

SPEAKER_01 1:25:53

Even my homegirl just her mama. You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_00 1:25:58

Yeah. Because what if they take it to some extra extent? Or what if you was like, okay, let's go to court about it. You feel me? Like, I'm I'm gonna sue you for pain and suffering.

SPEAKER_01 1:26:11

Like, I and now I and don't think that I don't have stuff on you that I can take your mama down. And then she be in a situation. And now you like, oh snap, now my mom's gotta, you know what I'm saying? Because there was stuff that I found post them leaving that for better lack of words, would have put her mama in a position. If I was to try to turn that in and be like, hey man, listen. I got this stuff to that, woo-do-woo-doo woo. Now they like, okay, they come, now they come for your mom, so you looking like, I was just trying, I didn't like him talking to me. Now you got a whole situation on your life. Nah. So it's just like people don't even think about that stuff, bro. People don't even it really be like that somehow the system and somehow our ignorance have allowed us to think that being this stupid of a people is okay. Like we really think, you know what I'm saying, like the team takeover stuff, kids down there going crazy, and we like, and the and and there are people that's like, they just being kids. Hell no. Or or even the fact that the kids themselves think that that's okay. Like, as kids, we I feel like we, though we we probably was wild in our own sense to our appearance or whatever, I still feel like there was this there was a common thread of common sense we all had, though. It was some stuff you kind of was like, yeah, I'm wild enough, but I ain't gonna do that. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? I ain't about to jump an old person.

unknown 1:27:59

I ain't

SPEAKER_01 1:28:01

I don't see a car door open, I'm like, yeah, I'm about to steal that car. Nah. Like, even if I've seen the car door, I'm not like, yeah, I'm about to hop in that. Like, there's just some things where it's like, nah, I'm not doing that. Like, it's like, oh man, I'm on some chips, and I only got a dollar, these dollar fifty, you know. I'm taking these chips. Okay, but me being like, oh, I'm about to run up somebody's crib in somebody's crib at night, like, nah, you could even tell me, like, hey man, we're about to go do them. Deuces. Like, I'm not about to do that. Like, so it's just it's interesting, like how the system and how people may have allowed us to think that being this ignorant is okay.

SPEAKER_00 1:28:42

Bro, ignorance is ruling the world right now. It is. Look at bro, who is we ran by who is this country ran by? What's going on? Like, what look at the masses? Look at it's so much pettiness going on in politics and religion and real life, like regular life situations. Yeah. It's like, bro, nobody wanna actually have an understanding. Everybody just wanna either follow a trend or just be on bullshit. I can't do it, bro. I was just watching some shit. These uh kids, I think they was from ATL, one of the homeboys wound up getting killed. Damn. So I think one of them, from what it looked like, they painting a picture as if one of them did it. If not all of them did it. Okay. I'm listening to their explanation, bro. Why don't one dude talking about? I'm 18, how I'm gonna kill a 20-year-old man. Huh? I'm just like, bro, what? What the fuck? Like, what be you might as well not say nothing. Cause what you said, the more they was talking, I'm just like, bro, you're really backing yourself into a corner. And then now you gotta remember all these lies and shit you telling. All of them. And then one of them like, yeah, if I knew I was gonna have to remember all this, I would have just like, wait, I mean, bro, what you mean? You mean like you never knew he was gonna come up missing, right?

SPEAKER_01 1:30:17

I wish I had a button for like some system.

SPEAKER_00 1:30:20

You cooked. What you mean? What is you talking about if you knew you was gonna have to remember everything you saying? Bro, just shut up. Like, if you guilty or innocent, shut up. Why do everybody feel they need to run to the internet and start explaining their life to the internet? Like, bro, the internet is the internet. Leave it there.

SPEAKER_01 1:30:44

And and and I'm not even gonna elaborate long. I'm just gonna say that it, bro, there are so many times in the heat of a thought process where I'm like, man, something, you know, I feel like getting my my shit off. I done typed full paragraphs of like thought pieces or responses to something somebody said on Facebook and then deleted it. Because I realized like not everything I need to say or feel need to be expressed on the internet. Not only because it can be traceable, but also what I'm learning on the internet is you there's no growth. Right? So I'ma say something in 2019, and I may think differently by 2026. But according to the internet, they just gonna go back and be like, remember what you said in 2019? I'm like, bro, I don't even feel like that no more. Yeah, but you said it though. So that must be what you that gotta be you. Yeah, okay, I did say it, but I don't feel that way no more. So what you mean is you you done you doubling back on what you said? I'm not about to argue with y'all, but you see how the internet did Kevin Hart like that, it's done so many people like that, where you could have felt a way back in the day and said something. And now you people so scared, they trying to scrub they they pass tweets, and because people just go back on the internet and they take things that you said and felt maybe at one period in time, and they look and they say, Well, this still this is the same you now. Yeah. And you can say, like, nah, you know what, I was wrong in my thinking back then. You know, I had a moment I thought like this, but I feel like this now. And that growth doesn't matter because according to the internet, whatever is said and done on there is final. You know what I'm saying? So I I'm always conscious of like, nah, I don't I don't need to express my talk about my marriage on Facebook or talk about my friendship. Mom hate me, I hate stuff. I'm not doing all that. Like, man. Every blue moon, that's why even when I do post stuff, people always reach out to me because they be like, you good? Because they know I don't even post a lot. Yeah. To even say something. So if I say something, it's almost like, oh, V say something. You know what I'm saying? Like, let me check on them. Like, because I'm not on there like most people, just regurgitating all my life on Facebook for the world to see. Facts.

SPEAKER_00 1:33:08

That's crazy. Um, yeah, so we at that closing point. I do I do gotta just throw this out there, and I really should have started with this, but I forgot. But I did win my case. So I'm feeling good about that. Yeah. Sick as hell I had to forfeit my gun. But fuck it, we buy another one. That's it. Buy another song. I don't give a fuck. I you know what I'm saying? Listen, hey, they can keep that, just don't take me. That's it. Hey. You know what I mean? Um, they tried to do some little trick-aroo shit on the court date, though. We get up to the court office, they talking about your court date on Zoom. What? How when the lady just told me my court date is in room three right now. Oh yeah. So it was some, yeah, it was some funny business going on down there. But I'm like, shit. All in all, the judge was cool as hell. Um I was glad that we got all that shit squared away. I ain't gotta be no felon and shit, so I don't, you know, gotta limit my opportunities. Yeah, yeah. So I'm like, okay, cool, we we can work with that shit.

SPEAKER_01 1:34:15

But that's a dub, man. Congrats. Praise God, bro. That's that, you know, we we done tossed a lot off by the there was a lot, obviously, at steak. You know what I'm saying? And and listen, we'll take beef. You know what I'm saying? We didn't take beef over steak. Listen, we'll take y'all keep all them steaks. Man. We'd take chicken. You know what I'm saying? Like, that's so, bro, congrats, man. That's that's what's up. Appreciate it, appreciate it.

SPEAKER_00 1:34:43

But yeah, bro, this was a good pie, bro. Yeah, this was a good pie. Uh definitely needed to get this one off finally. Um, we had some extra shit to throw in there though, since we waited. So You feel me? We we didn't, hey, cooked. Put it on steroids. Cooked. It was it was regular at first, we just threw some steroids on it. Cooked. I was I need that sizzle button. Cooked. Man, but yeah, uh shit. This been therapy in motion, uh, with my dog mature. Yeah. Hey, until next time, we out, G.