Sex

DISCLAIMER: Enjoy this week's episode after hours once you have tucked the kids in. It's for mature audiences, but not that mature. Now, Let's talk about sex baby, let's talk about you and me, let's talk about all the good things and the bad things that may be...Let's talk about sex. Let me ask you a question, and be honest. Do I make you horny baby? Do I? Do I make you randy? Yeah! It's everywhere we look, in music, movies, TV, and it's even slipped its way into art. It can be the ultimate bonding experience, a deeper connection, if you catch my drift. Oh Yeah! All joking aside and make no mistake about this: it's vital to our very existence. Where would we be without the power to procreate and pass the torch down, as well as our legacy, to the next generation? But let's call a spade a spade, who doesn't wanna get down, do the deed, get laid, or the many other euphemisms we use to describe an erotic encounter. Cos I'm horny, so so horny. So let's get it on. We're going to babble on about the birds and the bees on this week's episode of FYI! 

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disclaimer enjoy this week's episode after hours once you've tucked the kids in it's for mature audiences but not that mature now let let's talk about sex baby let's talk about you and let's talk about all the good things and thead may Let's Talk About Sex Let's Talk About Sex a little bit a little bit Let's Talk About Sex let's talk about let me ask you a question and be honest do I make you horny baby do I do I make you Randy yeah it's everywhere we look in music movies TV and it's even slipped its way into art it can be the ultimate bonding experience a deeper connection if you catch my drift all joking aside and make no mistake about this it's vital to our very existence where would we be without the power to procreate and pass the torch down as well as our Legacy to the Next Generation but let's call a spade a spade who doesn't want to get down do the deed get laid or the many other euphemisms we use to describe an erotic encounter cuz[Music] I'm so I'm wo let's get it[Music] on let Get It On Let's Get It On We're Going to Babylon about the birds and the bees on this week's episode of FYI welcome to for your info English you got it you got it[Music][Applause][Music] hello hello hello and welcome to this the episode of FYI where you've got to put the kids to bed or to put them down as we say or as you heard in the intro to tuck them in and I was serious about that this show is not for all audiences it's rated R not rated G G is General audiences and R is as of 17 I believe so let's kick off with that disclaimer a disclaimer is like a legal thing that you have to say I said enjoy this week's episode after hours I think you all know that you have after workor you have after hours here in Spain then I gave you the tuck the kids in so we said to put them to bed to put them down and to tuck them in and to tuck in is also what you do with your dress shirt then I said it's for mature audiences pronounce that with me mature and did you catch my pun if you'll notice I had a lot of puns in the intro I said for mature audiences but not that mature meaning we're all a little bit childish aren't we I love to play does does that make me childish does that make me immature ah who cares either way you know what I mean for mature audiences means we're going to talk about sex baby let's talk about you and me let's talk about all the good things and the bad things that may be Let's Talk About Sex and did anybody recognize that song that's salt and pepper Let's Talk About Sex baby and as you'll see there are tons of movies music and even ancient art that has to do with sex then we heard Austin Powers and he was given us a couple synonyms for saying cachondo in Spanish he said do I make you horny baby horny which you know from the song I played I'm horny horny horny horny tonight so horny he says he also says Randy hot and bothered is another way to say it too oh we're going to look at a lot of Juicy vocabulary let's take a look at some more puns that I put in the intro after Austin Powers I came in and said it's everywhere we look and as I just said music movies TV it's even slipped its way into art and to slip is met say it's usually used with sex see there I am showing everybody how mature I am well don't expect maturity I will try and treat the topic with respect as always but I had to slip that in there okay okay I'll move on then I got serious but just for a moment I said it can be the ultimate bonding experience and to bond means to connect then well I lost all seriousness I said a deeper connection get it deeper well either way get that expression do you catch my drift mapas and then we heard the climax we heard it an orgasm did I surprise you well either way I showed you an idiomatic expression or two right after it all joking aside bras and make no mistake about it it's vital to our very existence yeah where would we be if we couldn't procreate you wouldn't be here it's not just about passing the torch down and your legacy and the Next Generation although that's very important too but it's about survival of our race of our species and then yet another idiomatic expression I said let's call a spade a spade lasas who doesn't want to get down get down which as you realized if you are paying ATT attention in our dance episode we looked at the word get down as dance but I don't remember if I brought it up or not but it also means to get down baby you want to get down yeah it also has a sexual meaning a double on tonra a little bit of innuendo another way to say it but less common I would say is to do the deed to get laid that one's pretty common and there are many other euphemisms that we will take a look at in in the bonus episode then we got two more songs in there I'm horny which we already know the meaning of and Let's Get It On Marvin Gay the master and if you have never slept with somebody and I don't mean sleep if you've never made love to Marvin Gay you are missing out I mean his music his voice it's made for that let's get it on hey I don't want to turn you on already we just got started there's some great vocabulary for you too to turn somebody on estim the same way to turn somebody off is you know somebody o that turns me off smoking turns me off a bad attitude turns me off and we can also use them as nouns one of my turn-ons is somebody with a sense of humor one of my turn-offs is somebody who interrupts people you know where I learn these I learn these in Playboy also from Mr Tom Jones six bomb six bomb you know that you can turn me on six bomb six bomb we'll take a look at music and movies in the bonus episode remember every week There's a bonus episode that is available exclusively to my students on patreon if you want more information about that you can go to patreon ron.com Alberto Alonso but let's put it this way if you like what you hear there's more there's much more you can be a part of our community again it's patreon.com Alberto Alonso and I'd like to take a minute to send a shout out to all my patrons there are almost 200 of us and you guys rock keep up the great work I couldn't ask for better students and a special shout out to my super duper students Mara Javier and Paco and don't forget about my Interstellar students Carmen Lena Issa Paco David Jose Maria Patricio and Edgard if you want to join in on the fun go to patreon.com Alberto Alonso you can even join for free I don't think you get access to all the PDFs and the bonus episodes but at least you'll be in the loop and you are missing out because in the bonus episode this week we're going to take a look at tons of fun facts as always we'll take a look at the age-old question does size matter we'll look at sex and pop culture we'll look at the dark side vocabulary and idioms we'll look at funny ways to call the private parts and many ways to say to masturbate hey this is this is fun stuff we're even going to learn from one of my favorite movies There's Something About Mary hey pop culture is a really good way to learn so we'll look at all that and much more in the bonus episode I hope you'll join us over on patreon.com Alberto Alonso and I wrapped up the intro saying we're going to babble on about to keep talking nonstop about to babble on again we looked at that the Tower of Babel and another way to call sex especially when you're teaching your children about it when they are of the correct age we talk about the birds and the bees I don't know if you have a a Spanish way of saying it but it's a very light way inoffensive way of saying sex and it's also in a song let me tell you about the birds and the bees so let's Define sex x what is it sexual intercourse also coidus or copulation is sexual activity involving the insertion insert coin here we're talking about your Willie your Johnson okay Willie or Johnson are two different ways to say penis so if your name is Willie Johnson your name is berga berga oh man and what about Dick which is short for Richard what are these people thinking anyhow I'm getting sidetracked and thrusting and to thrust is to move forward in some kind of action you can see it in twerking a little bit when you're moving you're gyrating it's thrusting so the thrusting the insertion and thrusting of the male penis inside the female vagina for sexual pleasure reproduction or both this is also known as vaginal intercourse or vaginal sex another way to call the vagina is a [ __ ] but again that can be an offensive word to some people I personally don't get offended by words but some people do the definition goes on to say sexual penetration has been known by humans since the dawn of time and has been an instinctive form of sexual behavior and psychology among humans other forms of penetrative sexual intercourse include anal sex I don't have to explain it to you but penetration of the anus by the penis oral sex do I have to explain it we've also got fingering and also there's penetration by use of a dildo or a vibrator you've also got strap-ons hey I don't encourage that you visit porn websites but if you want to learn all this vocabulary just look at the different porn categories I'm not encouraging you to go to those websites there's a real dark side to pornography as well but we'll talk about that in the bonus part and these activities involve physical intimacy between two or more people yeah cuz sure you can have a threesome a foursome hey the more the merrier right well I don't know if you're into that whatever floats your boat as we say and they can contribute to human bonding which I said in the intro we have something we call STI these days back when I was a kid they called them STDs sexually transmitted diseases or sexually transmitted infections as they say these days I guess it has less of a stigma call it what you will I'm sure it's a bad thing to have crabs what do you call them leas or something like that crabs we call them kreos so be careful what you order at a restaurant hey uh it's a joke but also you should know that those two words mean the same thing obviously context is key when I was a kid I remember there was a lot of talk about STDs that was during the AIDS epidemic as well so they were always telling us you've got to practice safe sex you got to wear a condom that's a funny false friend you guys say preserv a preservative for us is something you put in food to keep it fresh we would say a condom you could also call it a rubber but just be careful because if you're in England well then a rubber isor yeah it seems like we can't agree on anything can we so obviously there's sex then there's promiscuity and what my dad always told me I think makes the most sense you're going to have sex in life I guess it's a natural thing as we said before it's part of procreation it's part of keeping our human race alive but also you're going to have sex because it's a pleasurable thing because you see women that turn you on but what he told me was make sure you always have safe sex don't take any unnecessary risks and I'll never forget that advice now sex is also something that should be done between two consenting adults if not then we are in some dangerous territory things such as rape or in incest that's between family members sexually abusing a minor zilia this is obviously with animals and some time ago in certain places premarital sex was illegal or extramarital sex I mean some things are just downright disgusting having sex with an animal or violating a child oh man just gross in fact let's move on to another topic sexual ual intercourse or let's just call it sex cuz that's what everybody calls it sex can Encompass various sexually stimulating factors physiological stimulation that's the body and psychological stimulation then you've got different sex positions which stimulate different parts of your erogenous zones when I think of sex positions I think of the commas Sutra but then you've got your basic ones you've got your missionary position doggy style cowgirl reverse cowgirl hey get creative as long as it doesn't hurt that's one thing I think we can all agree on sex should not be painful for either one involved and let's talk about foreplay what is foreplay well foreplay is all the stuff you do before insertion and I don't know there's always something where guys get a they get a bad rap they say guys don't like foreplay guys like getting down to the nitty-gritty getting into it no foreplay not for me but I think foreplay is awesome that's when you start getting really turned on when you're touching caressing bre even breathing on each other's necks all of that stuff can lead to sexual arousal and I like to build up to that moment myself but there's also something called the quickie which you know that too that's the bang bang bang bang well that's when you don't have enough time and you just try and sneak a quick one in there that's why it's called a quickie in Spanish you say uniki but if you've got the time there's nothing like foreplay to get you in the mood to get you rock hard to give you a boner those two are a little bit more slang the scientific way would be to get an erection but we'd say to get a wood to get a boner to pitch a tent I like that one hey that's something we've got to say we've gotten very creative and I mean we humans all over the world with our sex euphemisms and so the man gets sexually aroused and his penis gets erect and when the woman gets sexually aroused her vagina gets naturally lubricated as you guys know I'm no Dr Ruth oh you don't know who Dr Ruth is Dr Ruth was like the most famous sex doctor in the United States she was this old woman and people would call in and tell her their problems and she would solve them and she sounded so sweet totally funny and she is an icon as far as sex is concerned in the United States and she would explain it with such a lovely little voice without getting too much slang in there but also keeping it funny we already looked at a couple different ways to say to have sex there are many euphemisms you can say to screw to Shag to sleep together and of course the almighty [ __ ] [ __ ] is so much more than just forar and I'm going to share an audio clip that I created for my latest book this book is the [ __ ] and it gives you the many uses of the word[ __ ] give it a listen perhaps one of the most fascinating words in the English language nowadays is the word [ __ ] of all the English words that start with the letter F [ __ ] is the only word referred to as the FW it's the one special word that just by its sound can describe pain pleasure hate and love[ __ ] as many words in the English language is derived from German the word flicken which means to hit in English[ __ ] falls into many grammatical categories as a transitive verb for example Kevin [ __ ] Karen as an intransitive verb Karen [ __ ] its meaning isn't always sexual it can be used as an adjective Kevin is doing all the [ __ ] work as part of an adverb Karen eats too [ __ ] much as an adverb enhancing an adjective Diana is [ __ ] beautiful as a noun I really don't give a [ __ ] as part of a word abso [ __ ] lutely or INF [ __ ] credible and as almost every word in a sentence [ __ ] the[ __ ] [ __ ] as you are beginning to realize there are very few words as versa style as [ __ ] here you have instances describing situations such as fraud I got [ __ ] at the car dealership disgust ah [ __ ] it trouble I guess I'm really [ __ ] now aggression don't [ __ ] with me dude difficulty I don't understand this [ __ ] question Discovery what the [ __ ] was that disapproval I don't like what the [ __ ] is going on around here incompetence he's a [ __ ] off rejection why don't you go outside and play hide and go [ __ ] yourself I'm sure you can come up with many more examples with all of these multi-purpose applications how can anyone be offended when you use this wild card of a word I say use this unique flexible word more often in your day-to-day life it will distinguish the caliber of your character immediately l so say it loudly and proudly [ __ ] off oh man that was [ __ ] awesome if I may say so myself let's take a look at some fun facts over here did you know that vibrators were first developed as a medical device yes it was first invented in 1869 as a treatment for hysteria or other and I quote mysterious female disorders whenever a woman was reported as being mentally or emotionally upset which was quite common that happens to men and women it was considered an illness The Cure they used a large steampowered massager and this massager would massage the genitals with the goal of inducing and I quote hysterical paroxysm oh the Victorian term for orgasm well I'll tell you what not one patient complained they felt like a million bucks after those treatments and here's another thing that I thought was quite odd and something should be done while we're on the subject of sex toys they're unregulated you'd think that something that's designed to be put into your intimate areas where the sun don't shine as we say would have some kind of oversight I don't know some Branch some committee that can ensure safety and quality standards and we have this for medical devices we have this for many other products but not for sex toys it's completely unregulated and some of the materials that they use to make these sex toys are materials that are banned in children's toys because they're toxic because they're dangerous and you're putting this up your see what I mean so you don't want to skimp if you're into sex toys great but don't get the ones at AliExpress and I guess the same goes for lubricants or any products you can pick up in a sex shop here's another fun fact the left testicle usually hangs lower than the right for right-handed men and the opposite is true for lefties I didn't know it was linked to whether you were left-handed or right-handed and by the way we don't say eggs in English we say nuts we say balls but we don't say eggs not to talk about testicles here's another fun fact the average male orgasm lasts take a guess fellas or I should ask the the ladies 6 seconds what about the average female orgasm well that usually lasts 20 seconds but it's been proven orgasms can even lower a risk of heart disease stroke and even depression there are many health benefits it boosts your immunity also the body's production of antibodies and subsequently even lower blood pressure it can decrease the risk of prostate cancer again folks I'm an English teacher you've got to check with a medical professional if you're really want to know this stuff but it's true though sexual intimacy and orgasms increase levels of the hormone oxytocin it's also called The Love hormone and this can help you connect or bond with people so there are many health benefits to having sex regularly and we'll look at some more fun facts and tips in the bonus episode like why you should leave your socks on and as I said before does size really matter we'll find out all that and much more in the bonus episode of this week's FYI[Applause][Music] a[Music]