Hey there . So here's the T about reactive behavior , and when I say T , I'm serving it up with an acronym Thought , emotion action . You see , t-e-a thought , emotion action . It's something that's important to understand about the way we operate . That's important to understand about the way we operate . Here's how it works A thought arises , and that thought triggers an emotion , and that emotion drives the next action that we take .
Speaker 1When we're in reactive mode , though , there's little to no space between the three , little to no space between the thought , the emotion and the action . We act automatically , from a habitual defensive stance . We take the tea down in one gulp , so to speak , without checking to see if it's too hot . We skip the part about using our breath to cool it down , literally
and figuratively , and instead we blow our top Burned by our own reaction . Our focus is then pulled away from possibilities and toward what's painful . Is that making sense ? Let me give you an example .
Speaker 1So let's say you had a thought . Your thought is my best is not good enough . Well , that might cause you to feel the emotion of sadness or shame . And when you feel sad or shamed . And when you feel sad or shamed , well , the action you might take might look like withdrawing or giving up , maybe binging Netflix or eating copious amounts of ice cream . I'll give you another example . Thought might be I never get the opportunities that everybody else does . Well , when you say that to yourself , the associated emotion might be anger or resentment . And when you're feeling angry or resentful , well , the action you might take could be something like firing off a sarcastic text , or ranting to a friend , or even pretending that you just don't care , when it's very likely that you do . So you can see that when we react without slowing down , we limit ourselves to the same pattern behaviors over and over again and shrink our capacity for energetic choice . Well , the good news , the good news is that we can sweeten the situation by adding yet another acronym , by adding a little sugar to our proverbial tea . So here's the acronym to help you create space between your thought , your emotion and your action , because , as I like to say , possibility
lies in the places where there are spaces . See what I did just there .
Speaker 1So here it is the S in sugar . Well , it's stop , stop long enough to catch the thought . Just notice , it's amazing how much that can help . The you in sugar is unhook Unhook from the reactive thought . Remember , thoughts are energy and you are not your thoughts . So don't let your thoughts and your emotions drag you into reactive behavior . Unhook from that reactive thought , take the space . Remember thoughts are energy and you are not your thoughts . The G in sugar is ground . Take a beat and ground yourself . Breathe . Just ground yourself , take a beat and breathe .
Speaker 1The A in sugar is ask . Ask yourself what else is true . What else is true when you say things to yourself like I never get the opportunities that my colleagues do ? Ask yourself what else is true . Maybe you remember , maybe you remember all the things that you have had the opportunities to do . Maybe you think about . Maybe it's time to share some of the opportunities with others . There's so many different ways you could go that would cause a different associated emotion .
Speaker 1Finally , the R in sugar is recognize , recognize that by reacting so quickly , you are limiting yourself and your access , and your access not only to more energetic choice but to endless possibilities
to living a created life rather than a default future . And it's important to note before I sign off that reactive behavior is most visible in response to external triggers , but it originates internally . It stems from the influence of our lived experience and the assumptions , interpretations and the limiting beliefs that we've gathered in our journey . We'll talk more about those inner blocks on another episode . In the meantime , just remember this when we start to recognize our patterns , when we can trace the tea and stir in a little sugar , we begin to create the spaciousness that we need to grow , the space where energetic choice lives , that space where possibility returns . I'm Lisa Hopkins . Thanks so much for listening . Stay safe and healthy , everyone , and remember to live in the moment .