The Rochelle Christiane Podcast

248. Beyond Affirmations: The Real Work Happens in the Shadows

• Rochelle Christiane • Episode 248

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This week is a solo where I discuss doing the work and connecting more deeply with yourself to decondition. 

In this episode, I talk about: 

  • Emotional authority
  • Doing the work
  • Taking responsibility 
  • Pluto retrograde 
  • The emotional wave
  • Facing the shadow 
  • Connecting with your human design authority


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Speaker 1:

Welcome to the Rochelle Christiane podcast, formerly the Emotional Mastery podcast. I'm Rochelle, your host. I'm here to help you come back to your body, take charge of your emotions and live life on your terms. This podcast is a space for raw, real conversations about what it means to trust yourself, lean into your power and create a life that feels aligned and alive. We'll explore human design, astrology and other tools to help you understand your unique energy. More importantly, though, we're going to talk about what it means to actually live and embody these aspects. So each week, I'm going to share stories, lessons, guidance to help you navigate life's challenges and really own your magic. So if you're ready to step up, take control and show up as the most authentic version of you, let's begin. Welcome back to another episode on the podcast. Today we're going to be talking a little bit about emotional authority, emotions in general, the solar plexus, even a little bit about being non-emotional or open in the solar plexus area, and then really on like doing the work, like what that means, what it looks like, how to identify what you I'm air quoting should be doing in your body, because it differs for all of us, but really the most important thing, I believe, is really tuning into your body and understanding what it's telling you, what it the messages it holds for you and navigating from there, being really, really raw and honest with yourself, taking full, radical responsibility for your shit, because that is really where it begins. This past Monday, we had our full moon in Scorpio. If you're like me, I spent half the day crying. It was really, really, really intense and it's been a whole bunch of things that have been happening, and I think, with Pluto in retrograde, when Pluto Pluto in general is a slow moving planet regardless, and so the things that come up with Pluto, it's sort of like I always think about that frog in the boiling water example, where you put a frog in water and then start to boil it. It's not going to realize it's boiling until it's too late, right when Pluto is sort of this because it's slow moving. The things that are coming up, it's really slow. They slowly come to the surface, they're slowly asking for our awareness and then if we continue to ignore them because it's really easy to ignore those things as they're like slowly building up then it's just going to be like overwhelming and it's just. It's really it's like tickling on the edges of our consciousness to like see me right. And when we ignore it, then it just becomes bigger and those things that we shut down just eventually need to come out, and so Pluto in retrograde is then kind of intensifying those themes and Pluto went retrograde. I think it was the fourth, so it was in within like the last week where Pluto went retrograde. So those things are still pretty intense and Pluto is the ruler of Scorpio, which is why this really ties into this new moon or full moon, sorry, but okay.

Speaker 1:

Being an emotional authority we'll kind of start there. Being an emotional authority has been such a big lesson in my life emotions in general, right. So, whether you're defined or undefined, when you have an emotional authority, which means that you have a defined solar plexus in human design, it means that you need to ride the wave of your emotions. And now I think, as a blanket statement for all of us, yes, you might be a sacral, a splenic, self-projected, whatever, and not have the solar plexus defined, you are still going to experience emotions. And I think, in general, it's a pretty general rule that we should not be making decisions when we're feeling emotionally heightened. Right, we need to regulate ourselves.

Speaker 1:

Come back to a neutral space, but specifically when you consistently ride that wave of emotions, like whether it's high or low, it's so important not to do anything in those spaces, and this was one of the. This has been like the biggest lesson for me in my life, because I always wanted to make a decision in the moment, because it felt so uncomfortable to feel one way or the other. Right, when you're in a high, you're like, oh my gosh, the decision I make can't be wrong. There's no way. This feels too good for it to be wrong, and it's like this buzzy energy and you're just feel great. And then, equally in the low, then, of course, you want to make a decision because you don't feel bad anymore. Right, you want the thing to be resolved. Whatever you're fixated on, you want it to just like go away and be done, and like you think that making a decision or taking action within that moment is going to bring you to this neutral space.

Speaker 1:

Now, of all the decisions I've made from heightened emotional spaces, which have been many in my life, rarely do they ever actually feel good when I've gotten into a neutral space, meaning if I, you know, let's say I don't know. This is a poor example, but one that I think we can all relate to, like being in an argument with our partner and then making a decision or saying it's over, or leaving the house or something, right in the moment. And even when you look at children, right, you know, do not discipline your child when you're like super angry or super upset or whatever, because in that moment you can't see clearly, right, this really speaks to that emotional wave. We cannot see clearly. There is no truth in those moments when you're emotionally defined.

Speaker 1:

And what I think is a beautiful thing about understanding human design in partnership, as a parent, friendships, however, even workplace situation is that then you have that ability to see and and help others in in their designs. Right, like my daughter is emotionally defined, my son is not. So when she feels her wave, it's more supporting her in coming back to that neutral space and then also explaining to my son that, like when I'm feeling a certain type of way, like it doesn't mean anything about him, like he doesn't have to do anything with it, he doesn't have to take it on, he can go to his room and get away from it. His emotions will be amplified based on whatever he's picking up. So there's so many nuances to it that are so beautiful.

Speaker 1:

But the key thing here is, if you're feeling triggered, if you're feeling emotionally heightened, if you're activated this is not a space to make decisions from so finding something that will support you through that wave, through that heightened experience. Because, again, regardless of whether you're defined or not emotionally, if you're undefined, you're taking in and amplifying. So you're amplifying what's coming in so it can feel really big, it can feel really overwhelming. You might not know what to do with it. And so, again, having this knowledge to know that, say, you're in partnership with somebody who's emotionally defined and you're not, when you're feeling heightened emotions, you might just be picking theirs up and amplifying it and it's not yours. And it's not to say that you don't experience emotions, because we are all here to experience emotions. We just experience it in our body in different ways. And so really connecting with your body.

Speaker 1:

And this is the thing I love about human design and astrology Take or leave the system, but what I think the beautiful thing about it is is it gets you out of your head and into your body. And however you get there, whether it's through human design, whether it's through therapy, whether it's through somatic practices, whatever tool you use. The end goal is to come into your body and trust that. I think that we know. You know any major?

Speaker 1:

I don't know, I totally lost the terminology I was using, but we hear a lot about people saying go with your gut, go with your heart, like it can't be wrong if it's coming from an authentic space and that's key, right, like intention is so important. You can't say I'm coming from a heart-led space and harm a whole bunch of people. Right, like that. I think the intention behind it will always be pure if you're actually coming from that space. So, coming into your body and understanding I hope that made sense but coming into your body and like really navigating and making decisions from there, and I think that your body will always guide you to the best decisions for you.

Speaker 1:

If we can let go of the mind, if we can set the mind aside, all the narrative, all the stories, all the limiting beliefs, all the ego, right, I'm in a situation right now where there's so much ego and I and I have so much awareness of how much my ego wants to influence my decision. So it's really important to me in these moments to wait. Right, I'm emotionally defined, so I'm not supposed to make decisions in the moment. I literally need to continue to wait, wait, wait, wait right. The more that you wait as someone with emotional authority, the more appealing you will be. It's like kind of play hard to get and just wait right, set the ego aside, do what you got to do and wait.

Speaker 1:

So what I found to be really helpful in these heightened emotional experience is so I use the example of relationships a lot because this, for me personally, has been the biggest lesson of my life. I continue to face mirrors and triggers and lessons in relationships. Some people, relationships come really easy and that's a beautiful thing. For me it's not, and so it's been a lot of work through my life and it's been the one area I always say, like if I'm not romantically involved in someone, like I'm good, I'm so emotionally neutral, I'm just it's, I'm fine. And so it's always like in these spaces that I really have to face myself.

Speaker 1:

And this past week has been really, you know, this full moon really asked us to go deep. Really, you know, go to those places inside that we don't normally face, that we don't normally see, because it holds so much medicine for us. And when you go to those places and you really open your eyes and you really hold the space for what is there and to see it, like you can't help but be transformed on the other side. And, like I said, I was so low on Monday during this full moon and it would be, it would have been easy to try and reach out to somebody or to do something like yes, I worked out and I moved my body and those types of things, but I really just kind of let myself move through and process it and I journaled probably like 10 pages and what I found during all of that is like I journaled, I just put everything down on paper that was in my mind.

Speaker 1:

And I think a lot of times in this space, when we're trying to manifest our dreams and we're trying to change our lives, we think that like we can't think anything negative. We have to like think positive a lot of affirmation, a lot of affirmations, a lot of attraction and use a bunch ofations and like don't think that or like delete, right and replace, and yes, those things are important, but I think that you have to face the root right. You have to, you have to take the thing out by the roots in order to actually transform it. So if I just keep like like a weed, if I just keep like cutting the ends or a flower, if I keep cutting the leaves, it's it grows back bigger, right, I have to take the whole thing out and then maybe plant a new seed, right, in order for it to like grow and then nurture it as it goes. But so what I found when I was journaling all these pages, like all the negative things, all the limiting beliefs, I was actually able to like clear out and like face those parts of myself that I realized I had been just affirming away and not actually looking at Like for me.

Speaker 1:

Again, in relationships I always will journal. I'm like, oh, like, worst case scenario, I end up single and then, okay, like, fine, Right. But I actually had to like go in and like within my 10 pages of journaling and realize, like I actually really really want a partner, I want somebody that can be there for me, that can support me, that can nourish me and vice versa, right, but like, I really really want that and I have to face that that kind of that is a shadow, because it's like the more that we want something, the more that we're desiring something, the more that we're kind of like pushing it away. So it's like being okay with the fact that, like okay, if I end up single, I end up single and like I'm okay with that, like I have my kids, I have myself, I have my friends, like all that good stuff, and also acknowledge, like I really this is like a really big desire for me and I didn't realize how big that was until I like actually put it out.

Speaker 1:

And then the other thing is like through all that journaling, through putting everything on paper again, noticing all these things that like I actually hadn't been facing, that have been like in the closets of the rooms, that I was kind of like pretending like I was seeing. Fully, once you get that out, it's it is kind of like a clean slate, it's like OK, so now I actually don't have anything to control, in a sense. And it's like this open vessel now Like I felt cracked open to be like okay, I'm fully open now to whatever experiences, opportunities, whatever it is that's coming my way. And it's like I think sometimes when we pray or ask for what we want, what we desire, we make lists. We often have this idea of what we want and what we want it to look like and how it's going to come to us.

Speaker 1:

And when we have those expectations, we kind of miss the things that are really for us. Right? The universe, god, source, creator, whatever term you want to use is kind of funny in that way where it's like the thing that we want never, ever, looks like the way that we think it's going to look. It's always unexpected, it's always, you know, anytime, like we made a manifestation list or anything. It's like always this or something better right, because it's like I can't control what is for me. I have to be open to it, and if I'm not open to it, then I'm missing the plot, I'm missing the experiences, I'm missing the plot, I'm missing the experiences, I'm missing the opportunities.

Speaker 1:

So it's like again, like tuning into your body is like number one important, because then a having a facing the triggers, then being honest about them and then knowing, like what direction you should be going in, knowing when something is for you coming in again, whatever your authority is in human design, like really tuning into that as like a decision making strategy, is so helpful Because once you really get used to that, once you come into your body and this is something we practice inside holistic human design academy inside empower, decode your design, like all of it is like really tuning in, like even consider throwing away the concept of human design, like wherever your authority is, like whatever, but like coming into your body, just spending like even three minutes a day just in the practice of like what does a yes feel like? Like just say yes over and over and over and see what it feels like in your body. What does a no feel like? And say no over and over and over and see what it feels like in your body and just like explore how it feels inside your system to get a body yes and a body no. And then practice it in micro ways.

Speaker 1:

So practice it with food. Practice it in really small decisions. Practice it in, like, the coffee shop that you want to go to. Practice it in where you want to go for dinner tonight. Practice it in spaces, right. Go to different places. If you're an environmental authority, go into different places and see what it feels like. If you're a reflector, just try different things and see what it feels like if you're a reflector, just try different things. Do it in micro ways that aren't really big decisions that aren't gonna overwhelm you, because it's usually the bigger the decision, the more triggered we are and the more we have to practice emotional regulation or nervous system regulation to then come to that space to hear Because when we're activated it tends to be louder than our authority.

Speaker 1:

Right, like intuition authority, whatever term you wanna use it our authority right, like intuition authority, whatever term you want to use it that inner knowing, that decision-making that comes from in your soul, in your body, is quiet and it's confident, right. And so if we're looking from the lens of emotional authority, when I'm activated in either way of the spectrum, it's so loud, it's overwhelming, it's so loud. So I know that's not a place that's going to give me clarity, that's not a place that's really going to guide my decision, to make the most aligned decision for me. I have to come to that neutral space and sometimes I have to go through it multiple times, right, to get to that neutral space multiple times and then reflect like huh, when I'm here, when I'm neutral, I'm consistently feeling this way. And the most frustrating thing about emotional authority is you will never actually have 100% clarity. You just won't. You have to go with what feels the best overall, consistent, you know consistently, as you've hit that neutral space and then operate from there.

Speaker 1:

So, okay, so, coming into the body, practicing in those micro moments that decision making strategy, again, we'll weave in our, our, our strategy here, right, like, what is your, what is your strategy in human design? Is it wait to respond? Is it wait for an invitation? Is it to inform? Is it to wait a lunar cycle? Like, what is your strategy? And then really again play with that Beautiful thing with generators. Like you're waiting to respond to the world and the world responds in so many different ways. And the key thing with being a generator type and manifesting generator, generator responding is like it's not the downloads that come through your mind, right, when we are, our strategy is to respond to the world around us. It has to come from outside of us, the best way to really get into.

Speaker 1:

So, if you're feeling really stagnant, if you are maybe unclear of, like, what should I respond to? Like, get out in the world, right, like, go to a restaurant, go to a market, go to a mall. Like you're going to have more things to respond to and you'll notice maybe those things being, um, not louder, but you'll have, yeah, you'll just have more to respond to and you'll maybe feel the inspiration more and then you can run it through your authority right, like if you are a manifester, again informing, making sure we're telling people and setting those clear boundaries. Like I'm not asking for permission, I'm letting you know because I care about you and my decisions. My movement has a huge impact, right, and you want to let those people know you care.

Speaker 1:

Projectors, like waiting for that invitation is so key and it comes in so many different ways, so really exploring what that looks like for you. And then reflectors, like taking time. You know, like no, you're not going to take 28 days to make a decision on what you're eating for dinner. Like, obviously not. But when you practice those micro moments, right, even waiting, like if you want to, like I don't know if you're trying to decide what you want for dinner just wait five minutes, right, or make sure you're articulating to people in your life that you care about, like, hey, I need time. Right, like allowing yourself that time so that in the bigger decisions it'll be easier.

Speaker 1:

But again, like leaning into that strategy to then come into your authority, right, and just understanding, like we're all magnetic, we're all abundant, we're all worthy just for being here in these physical vessels and these physical bodies and like breathing here, being here in these physical vessels and these physical bodies, and like breathing here, like we are so, like worthy and capable and able of, like doing all these things and rewiring our subconscious in such a beautiful way, so honoring that, remembering that and then like coming, sort of coming back to doing the work, right. So okay, we're neutralizing our emotions. We're journaling however many pages need a journal. We're neutralizing our emotions. We're journaling however many pages need a journal. We're doing some sort of somatic practice to regulate whether it's, you know, running, dance.

Speaker 1:

I mean, I love physical movement because, literally, emotions is energy in motion, and so if we can actually shift our energy, like actually with our body, it's just like a faster I don't know if faster is the right word, but it does, it moves that energy around and it shifts it, and so it's a really powerful way to do it. So we've recognized, we've again neutralized, moved, journaled, whatever we're moving through our emotional wave. We've recognized our body, what a yes is, what a no is, listen to our authority, listen to our strategy. So maybe we're in a really low, low and we just want to sit in bed, like great honor that and give that to yourself. And also like, move your body, maybe get in public, maybe go to a coffee shop you can sit in the corner, but you'll have more things to respond to, like if you're a generator type, whatever it is.

Speaker 1:

And then, like noticing that often the most uncomfortable thing is really the thing that you need to do, right. So small example if I really don't want to go to the gym, like if I'm in a low and the idea of going to the gym, just like oh, it's like, oh, my gosh, I don't want to go, that's the thing that I need to do, right, and it's in, and it's like the thing that is our norm. When we're trying to do something different, when we're trying to rewire our subconscious, when we're trying to create new beliefs subconscious, when we're trying to create new beliefs and new actions and really change, like not, it's not about changing who we are, but it's about like shifting and transforming our mindset, our perspective, because perspective is everything, right, the way that you view the world impacts everything. And so really noticing, like again I'm going back to the example of relationships for me it can be confusing because I'm a fearful, avoidant attachment style, and so I oscillate between anxious and dismissive. But then I have to notice, in moments when I tend to match energy. So if I feel, if my perception is, if I feel you pulling back a little bit, I will pull back harder, because then it's like in those situations I get to avoid vulnerability, because I don't have to say, hey, it's actually kind of hurts that you're pulling back, like I've noticed that we're not communicating in the same way that we used to be and it kind of bothers me or I feel this way about it. Right, if I pull back harder, I don't have to have those conversations and then, and then if it falls off or if like whatever, then it's almost like I've protected myself and so I notice my pattern there and so instead of doing that because that is my go-to, that is my natural inclination in those situations do the opposite Actually communicate in those moments. Or if there's a moment when I'm really low and I'm like I need to send a text or I need to tell you how I feel, maybe then is the chance to be dismissive. So just noticing what your pattern is, what your natural go-to is like, what feels more uncomfortable in this moment is is what feels more uncomfortable for me to actually reach out and be like, hey, I noticed X, y, z. This makes me feel this way, I just wanted to check in. That feels more uncomfortable than just being like, oh, I'm just going to disappear and then the balls in your court, kind of thing. Right, so just noticing what your patterns are and doing the opposite is the way that you can then begin to rewire.

Speaker 1:

I was also listening to a real, I think, last week or something like that, as I was like going through this and it's so true, but the guy was saying I probably, I don't even know where it is, whatever, I'm not going to try and find it. But the guy was saying that we, so often the human mind is always going to the worst case situation, right, where it's like, just using the dating example of again, because that's just easy, if my perception is that your, let's say, texting pattern has changed, and then I go to the worst case. Oh my gosh, he doesn't like me anymore. Something I said, something I did, like there's somebody else, like he's dating somebody else, or like maybe an ex reached out, he's not interested, like I like all of the thoughts that go through. Right Instead of like.

Speaker 1:

Or also, when you catch yourself in that like, acknowledging that hey this is actually painful for me noticing what your pattern is right, doing the opposite of that in order to rewire those patterns and to show yourself that you're safe, but also like, and then, on top of it, being like, hey, instead of thinking of the worst case situation right here, like cause here's the thing whether we're thinking the worst case situation or the absolute best case situation, it's like we're kind of lying either way. Catherine's and Kina had this thing where she she said something about um, she was in a taxi and the driver was asking her, like what she did, and I don't know, she gave this big thing. And he says so you're teaching people how to lie to themselves. And she was like either way, if you're being negative, you're lying. She said I'd rather people lie to themselves in a way that supports them, something along those lines, and so that's kind of like the point that I'm getting to is this person to have a conversation with me and it was the best conversation in the world. What if I actually texted?

Speaker 1:

And then now we start like, literally, instead of the worst case scenario, can you then go think of like actual best case scenario, right. And so I was doing that, after I like cycled through everything, after I started coming back to myself a little bit, instead of thinking of the worst case situation, like you know what, I'm going to replace this with the best case situation, the best case scenario, and you know what like it, it really. I felt energetically in my body, I felt something shift which then allowed me to perceive it differently, and I do believe your perception is everything. You create your reality by what you believe. If you believe so strongly that things are going to be a certain way, the universe has no option but to give it to you, right? If I have like such a negative lens that everything, anywhere I go, something is wrong, then that is what I will see.

Speaker 1:

If I believe that, like if I look at things optimistically, you can have two people. It's so interesting there If you can have two people walk into the same place, have the same experience, eat the same food, drink the same drink with the same people, listening to the same music, everything. And one person be like, wow, this is absolutely amazing. And the other person's like, well, this person said this and that person didn't do that and that was a little bit burnt. Like your perception is everything truly? And it's funny because I've been realizing lately that I this is a little I tend to look at things from like the cups half full.

Speaker 1:

I always give people the benefit of the doubt. I truly believe that underneath it all, we all are well-intentioned. I believe we're all good people. It's really hard for me to not trust people right off the bat, like I think, like my past makes it a little harder to trust people and there are like little ways that I show that. But like overall, like I think everyone my past makes it a little harder to trust people and there are like little ways that I show that, but like overall, like I think everyone's great right.

Speaker 1:

Like when I first meet you, I will watch you and observe you and I'll see how you operate around people. I'm definitely the type of person that watches before I engage, just so that maybe it's it's probably a protection thing, but regardless. But I've also noticed that I'm a very serious person, I'm a very intense person, I have very challenging emotional experiences and also within that, I still have the ability to look at life as the cup half full right. So it's this really interesting thing and I'm working out. But like just the fact of like accepting that I am intense as fuck, like I like it's really hard sometimes, like my lows are so low and it really takes a lot of like in those moments when I'm, when I'm low like that, in those moments I will latch on to that like one negative thought, like, oh my, like I don't, I don't, can't even like give an example right now, but like when I'm in it, I latch on to that one thought that's just gonna to make me cry and make me feel awful. And then I have to like loosen my the grip a little bit and then come back and cycle back.

Speaker 1:

But if you kind of the moral of this whole story is that if you're not actually again, if you're not facing the underlying issue, if you're not diving down and this is what the Scorpio full moon helped us if you're not diving down to the absolute bottom and skimming off the bottom and understanding what's actually down there, you can affirm all you want all day, that's still going to be there, right? So we can add on, like the tower card and the tarot. The tower card isn't about the moment of like the lightning, lightning hitting the tower and everything crumbling. The tower card is actually about what's underneath the tower. What is the foundation that you are setting. The tower card is the moment where we've the tower is gone. Now, right, we've cleared it away and now we have to look at what's underneath so that we can actually build something, build upon it in a more supportive way.

Speaker 1:

And I feel like for me, like this, the last, however many months has been a massive tower card, like that tower has been struck over and over and over and again. And now I've got an opportunity to really see what the foundation is, what's underneath, and now I can build. And that's where I felt like I was on Monday, after I journaled all of it, after I faced all of my like inner shadows and like the painful things. Then I was like, wow, now I've actually cleared this out. I'm sure there's still little things here and there, but then with awareness, right, like as I move through, cycle through new things, like I can, I can go to that depth and pluck it out a lot easier than just like building on it and having to sift through it. But I feel like it's been such a massive clearing out that it's like now I can, it's just just. It's a. It is a really painful place to be, but it's also a really beautiful place to be, to like have so much more awareness around my emotional experience, around my emotions, around how to navigate them.

Speaker 1:

And it's crazy because I've been in this process for like seven years and it's only until like like every year I feel like I do better. Every year I feel like I move forward. Every year I feel like a whole different human being than the one before. And I say all this because actually I just realized this episode is coming out on my birthday. So it's a huge reflection point for me. And every year I'm like massively changed. But for some reason this year I feel like again almost seven years into this human design experience.

Speaker 1:

I think July will be officially seven years I human design experience. I think July will be officially seven years. I actually finally feel like I've figured out the emotional authority. That does not mean it's not going to be challenging. Doesn't mean I'm not going to be confronted by it, doesn't mean that I've got it figured out and it's now a walk in the park Absolutely not. But I finally feel like I figured out the process and how to navigate it and how to experience it and how to explore it and what to do in the moment. So this is like for me this past week. It's been, you know, it's been accumulating, but I finally finally feel like an expert in the emotional authority field.

Speaker 1:

That's something I've been working on for a long time and so, with that being said, of course I'm going to, I'm thinking how I can, you know, have a workshop or a course or something, because I think it is profound and the fact that there are 51% of us emotionally defined is so important, especially because, you know, 2027, things are shifting the prophecy in human design, the way we experience emotions with the generations to come. You know anyone born theoretically in 2027, and beyond, they had the genetic mutation. They're experiencing the solar plexus in a very different way and it's going to be very different than the way that we experience it now. And so, with 51% of us being emotionally defined, raising these children, it's like we really need to get in right relationship with our emotions. We really need to not project. We really need to do this work now to heal ourselves, so we're not passing that on to this new generation, right? I mean, set human design aside. I mean, this is the work of every generation, right? We're always trying to do better than the one before to be better for our kids, so that they can be better for their kids and pass it on. Because when we're doing this work, we're healing like seven generations past and seven generations forward.

Speaker 1:

And so if you're with me and you feel like this work is so hard and it's so overwhelming, and sometimes it's like why am I experiencing this, why do I have to go through this? Like, yes, it might feel really, really hard, but like I'm doing the work for like my ancestors, and I'm doing the work for my children and their children and their children's children, and you know, so on and so forth. And so it's like there's always kind of that one person in the family line that has been tasked or has chosen. We'll say right, the soul has chosen to come in and do this work, um, in order to like to shift and and and support and and help and transform and change the family line. And so it's.

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It's a lot of work, it's not easy, and just because I feel like I figured it out now doesn't mean that the next time I'm in a low I'm going to be like, okay, you know, everything's fine, like no, it's still going to be painful. But again, like I said, figuring out the formula. I feel like I finally figured out the formula and it's funny because it's like human design talks about these seven year cycles and when I first learned it I was like man, I'm going to hack the system and I'm going to figure this out. And sure enough it. And, like I said, I don't. There's still so much more work to do. But this one piece took me seven years to like really feel like, wow, I get it now. I get it now I get it. And so you know again, really diving down, diving deep, facing it, transforming it, taking that pause in the moment, not having to do something, doing the opposite of what is natural or normal or what comes normal to you, because that's that conditioned response. Right, doing the uncomfortable thing, but also knowing, like this is where the work gets a little nuanced right, because, like, knowing when that uncomfortable thing is actually the thing that'll support you versus the thing that, like, are you actually repeating a pattern by doing the uncomfortable thing, if that makes sense? Because sometimes I feel like I'm so used to the chaos and I'm so used to the discomfort that sometimes it's like well, is this thing actually supporting me or am I doing this just to create more chaos, right? So, like again, it just comes back to being radically honest and raw and real with yourself of, like, what's going on, what are you feeling? So I hope this episode was supportive.

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Share with a friend follow on Instagram, tiktok. I've started re-engaging. Oh my gosh, I'm like, I love Instagram so much. Guys. Like Instagram is just as a photographer as you know, taurus, sun, venus ruled. Like I love the aesthetics of Instagram. I love everyone on Instagram, my community on there. But man, tiktok, you guys are so engaged. I absolutely love it. So I am fully back on TikTok over there. It's been actually a lot of fun. I've really loved engaging and answering questions and talking to everybody over there. So if you found me on TikTok and you're listening to the podcast, welcome, thank you for being here.

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And you can get on the emotional.

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Emotional.

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The Mastery Monday newsletter which comes out every single Monday Transit update, energy update, podcast update all the things are in that newsletter Link is down below.

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Holistic Human Design Academy is always there's a self-paced course that's always open. Empower get on the wait list for the next round of Empower decode your design and I'm in the works of a sacred unraveling course membership, still figuring out exactly what that looks like, but that's how it's felt lately. It's just this sacred. Like every time I have like a trigger or an activation, it's I kind of like go in and I unravel. I feel like it's like a ballerina unraveling it. So it just felt like this little sacred space. So I want to create a container that's like helping and supporting others in this sacred unraveling and coming back to themselves. So that is coming. Keep an eye on for it. Again, get on the newsletter email and you'll be the first one of the first to know. And yeah, I'm just like so grateful for you whether it's your first time listening, whether you listen to every single episode, majority of the episodes 10 episodes doesn't matter. I'm just super excited that you're here and I will talk to you next week.