You can be right or you can be in a relationship, but in the current world why are relationships so difficult that people are struggling with isolation?
You can be right or you can be in a relationship, but in the current world why are relationships so difficult that people are struggling with isolation?
Hello there friends, both old and new. Welcome to the strive seek find podcast. I'm your host, Chance Whitmore, home to bite sized lifestyle advice from a fellow traveler on the road to a better life. Brought to you by someone who is a longtime educator, writer, parent, and an outdoor enthusiast, who may just may like a good draft, because our future is set not just through our choices, but by our willingness to explore and find a better way. Good evening, friends, or good morning or whenever you're listening to this, welcome back to strive, seek find got a little bit off the cuff tonight. And this, what I think is my 130/4 episode of the podcast, I'm grateful to all of you who are listening as a culture. And I hate to use this word because we tend to overuse it. We're in crisis right now. You can look it up on any media site. Depression numbers are up, anxiety is up. And people feel more isolated than ever, despite being more connected than we've ever been. So while I've mentioned over and over again, my one of my favorite quotes is, you can be right or you can be in a relationship probably said it 10 times on the podcast. I would argue that while we all talk about relationships being central, there's not many of us that are very good at them anymore. Not from ill intent by any means. But our situation isn't necessarily built for it. Relationships have certain touch points, they need shared interest, shared time, conversations, to provide a foundation for a deeper relationship. A shared interest is a starting point. But I know an awful lot of people who like movies, or comic books or hiking, that I'd go 30 miles out of my way to avoid just because their personality isn't what I want to spend time around. But those things provide a foundation for relationship. And to be done right, those things all share one common aspect. You need to have time and you need to make time. It has to be important to you. And there's where we get in trouble. Most of us are stressed. And with stress comes distraction. Because we're often often running towards something at all times. We have to be busy, we have to be productive. Even our downtime has to show productivity in order to be good downtime. Or we glorify the idea of how much vacation time we turn back in. And when I say it that way. It sounds as ridiculous to me as it is when I get to the end of the year and realize that there's so many of these personal days I have that that just disappear because I have too many saved up. But because we're stressed and distracted, it seems to make sense. Because it feels like you're moving towards the solution to what stressing you out. And now I'm getting off task so forgive me. Now you take a group of people who are stressed, depressed, anxious, and it becomes easier to throw up barriers. How many of you actually sit and visit with someone in the waiting room or in line at the grocery store versus staring straight ahead or more likely playing with your phone? Those are missed opportunities for connection. Like most things, this has all been trained into us. Self trained, trained by society. It's there. You have natural barriers by carrying around your pocket computer. You have social media to distract you on said pocket computer. You can be at a table in a restaurant and watch four people text each other rather than talk while a fifth is playing In whatever online game is popular right now, that's supposed to be a shared experience. But all these little distractions, all these little addictions are so much easier than dealing with what's in front of us. So it's going to take choice and training, you don't want to be isolated, you got to reach out, you got to create those shared moments, and you got to have those conversations. And they gotta be deep enough that it's easier to put aside the phone, or whatever other sort of distractor you might have. And I know this isn't short, and I've got a whole bunch of stuff in mind with it. That relates but doesn't relate because I, I wonder, honestly about the fact that one of the reasons that our discourse has become so simplified that it's easier, yes or no, your for us or against us. It's because that's simple to digest and understand. You don't have to have discourse in it. You don't have to have a conversation. You don't have to put thought into it. I believe x, therefore, y is evil. When you put it that way. It seems simplistic. And honestly, it is. But it is definitely the way we're seem to be running the world right now. Yes, no, for us or against us. Instead of learning to have a conversation, learning to have a disagreement, learning how to build a relationship, learning how to think I don't know if this is a Get off my lawn diatribe. I don't think so. I'm going to be honest with you. It feels like a play in the wilderness. Folks, we got to do better. Because what we're leaving behind could be a disgrace otherwise. Until next time, friends. Keep seeking. Well, friends, that's it for this week's edition of strife seek find. Thank you again for listening. If you'd like to join the discussion, or have ideas for future episodes, hop on over to the strife seek find podcast group on Facebook. Alternatively, if Facebook's not your thing, you can find me on Instagram at strife seek find podcast on Twitter. As at chance Wetmore five. We're even on email. Links for all those are in the show notes below. Until next time, my friends, keep seeking your own brilliant future