You Are Enough

You are NOT a problem to be fixed -- despite what you might see on social media!  It is so easy to allow someone else's "shoulds" encroach and quietly steal your happiness and well-being.  

In this episode, I share an awareness technique for recognizing when a "growth opportunity" is really a "should" in disguise. 

Follow Bobbi at:

Sign up for Bobbi's free newsletter, Find Your Forward and receive her free guide: Thriving Forward:  Master Your Inner Game for Greater Happiness, Well-Being and Success: https://www.bobbikahler.com/newsletter

https://www.linkedin.com/in/bobbikahler/

Transcript

Copy Transcript Copied

Hello everyone, I am so glad that you are here!  While you still probably have your phone in your hand, now is a great time to hit that subscribe or follow button. 

Today’s episode is probably going to be pretty short, but I think it’s incredibly important that you hear it.  Here is the core message: 

You are enough.  

You are not a problem to be solved or fixed.

You are not deficient. 

You are whole. 

I am so tired of seeing all of the marketing messages that bombard us that tell us why we aren’t good enough.  

And that’s what those messages are:  marketing messages that will make you feel bad enough about yourself that you have to buy whatever they are selling. 

In coaching there are basic premises that a coach should be coming from. A few of my favorites are: the client is resourceful, the client is not a problem to be fixed, and the client is whole. 

Does that mean that we never have areas where we want to grow?  Of course not.  But are we growing out of fear and deficit or out of love and grace?  

Since my dad’s passing in November, I have been acutely aware of how much of the time, I am scanning for where I’m falling short.  Where I could do better? What could I improve?  

Several months ago, it finally hit me: I am not a problem to be fixed.  I am whole.  I am okay.  These statements have become my mantra that I repeat to myself throughout the day but most importantly, I say them to myself as I’m lying in bed before I rise in the morning.  

The other thing that I’m doing is that I’m observing myself when I have a thought about something that I want to work on or an area that I want to grow in.  Is it coming from a deficit place?  It’s easy to tell because when I’m acting out of deficit or fear, there is stress or anxiety associated with the feeling.  By contrast, when I’m approaching growth from love and grace, there is a feeling of excitement and energy.  

So, when I observe that I’m coming from a fear and deficit-based place, I have started to question:  is this really an area I want to grow in or is it somehow am external should?  I hesitate to say that it has always been a should but I’m struggling to think of a single example where it hasn’t been. Once I recognized that it is an external should – meaning from some outside messaging – I have stopped to ask myself:  is this really aligned with who I am, what I value and the journey I am on?  

If it’s not aligned with who I am, what I value and the journey I am on, then it is worse than useless – it is a distraction.  It’s a weed in the garden that has to be pulled up and discarded. 

I hope that this was a helpful topic.  I hate that I see people feel bad about themselves because they aren’t measuring up to someone else’s yardstick.  Let's define our own yardstick.

Remember, you are whole, you are resourceful, you are enough.