Imagine if the only person you had to surpass was your own self from last year. Let's join together to reflect on our personal journeys of growth and transformation in 2023. We've navigated our health transformations, understood the power of coaching, and have experienced the profound benefits of intentional growth. Our experiences with the Japanese lifestyle concept of Ikigai have illuminated how being kind to oneself, while persistently moving forward, can lead to significant changes.
Have you ever found comfort in discomfort? Let's share how embracing discomfort can be a stepping stone towards fulfilling our dreams. We will discuss resilience, positive attitudes, and their role in helping us achieve those dreams.
Look up, and let's elevate!
Imagine if the only person you had to surpass was your own self from last year. Let's join together to reflect on our personal journeys of growth and transformation in 2023. We've navigated our health transformations, understood the power of coaching, and have experienced the profound benefits of intentional growth. Our experiences with the Japanese lifestyle concept of Ikigai have illuminated how being kind to oneself, while persistently moving forward, can lead to significant changes.
Have you ever found comfort in discomfort? Let's share how embracing discomfort can be a stepping stone towards fulfilling our dreams. We will discuss resilience, positive attitudes, and their role in helping us achieve those dreams.
Look up, and let's elevate!
Hey, it's Jen the Builder and Corey and hello, everybody who is listening today. Hello, hello and hello. It is so good to be here with you and with you, corey, and likewise, I'm looking at our candles lit in the Elevate Studios and I don't know. Someone tell me that you are caught in the season of fall with us because all our candles that are lit are pumpkin. Everything in the home is still pumpkin in autumn, we have not transitioned to winter and winter is officially almost here.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think we transition late into fall and that's what's causing the delay into winter.
Speaker 1:Right, right, speaking of winter, as we're celebrating the last few weekends of December, we had a great one and we're going to share everything that's happened and give some announcements towards the end of the episode today, so please stay tuned.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you don't want to miss this stuff. It's great stuff that's happening right now.
Speaker 1:It really, really is. I'm so excited and you know, Corey, one of the things that we talk a lot about is coaching and in coaching, the most powerful, effective tool used is your coach's questions. So when we think about 2023, let's go ahead and name some projects or things that we've done this year that we're proud of.
Speaker 2:Sure, I'm starting with me, I guess. So, projects that I've started, obviously the band. I started the EP and I started, you know, that was this year the EP. Well, I released it, okay, and then I'm starting the second EP, and it's all because of the power of being focused, having drive, having someone in my corner, someone's in my corner, coaching being a huge part of that, just being able to talk it through. The book was released and put out and, yeah, it's just on and on and on, you know.
Speaker 1:The book being ruffles yes, right which is available on Amazon and on Barnes and Nobles. Absolutely yeah, those are really big things, this year for us, specifically for you, big things for me. Can you believe that I have been in workshops for coaching to upskill me, to refine me, to take me to the next level of coaching? It's been almost three years.
Speaker 2:Yeah it's. It's a bit of a pressure cooker, if you ask me. It's kind of refining you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah. It's definitely put me under the fire. It's definitely put some pressure on me.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:That has been so good for my growth. I'm about to end it next year, by the middle of next year, and then work on my next credentials, so that's been something that's huge. Aside from growing, the growth and development team at the company we work for, which is only a year and a half old, and so to see that growth and be a part of it has been huge for 2023. And another thing, too, gloria, journey that you invited me on is your health journey. Yes, we're at different levels and health has been a big one this year, and so I sent you a picture. Remember, last night I sent you a picture of like holy cow. This was you exactly a year ago.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I was mortified, gosh. Okay, so that's what I was dealing with and not dealing with all that anymore. But yeah, it was really hard to swallow that picture. I am officially 50 pounds down from that point that I was then and that's such good work.
Speaker 1:I'm having fun.
Speaker 2:That's what I can say. I'm having a lot of fun. It just gives you so much more in return as far as energy, as far as movement, as far as desire and drive. It's all there because you just have that oomph behind you now.
Speaker 1:And you know what's interesting is, it seems like you've lost more than 50. And I think that's because the lifestyle that you've chosen as far as what you're eating it's really leaned you up. For me, it's been a teeter-totter of right around 30 pound weight loss, and so that's a celebration.
Speaker 2:And now.
Speaker 1:I had a couple of snags where I plateaued or just kind of didn't go as hard, and I'm learning that going soft as long as you're moving in the right direction, every day is totally fine and it's actually one of the ways. Ikigai, which is the Japanese lifestyle of leading happiness right, having happy in your life that's one of the concepts is exercise and health, and it's okay to go soft on your body.
Speaker 2:It's okay to go hard, it's okay to go soft as long as you're going. Just go, just get it moving, and then you'll be going the right direction. A lot of people think you know, I have to do this or I have to do that in order to accomplish this goal. I'm gonna tell you straight up if you just remove one thing, add one thing that's going to push you further in the right direction, I guarantee you, you will see the results.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and one of the things, too, that we really reflect on and are intentional about is that we really hope that we're not the same person we were a year ago, right, that there's growth, that some things have changed about us, that we're evolving, you know. So I do this where I compare and that's why I went through pictures from last year, because pictures helped me remember. Okay, this is what we were doing last year, this is where we were at, what changes have happened, what changes did we intentionally invite into our lives and what we're forced upon us?
Speaker 2:Right, and I'll give you an example of that. So in that picture that you sent me, sitting in front of me was a chocolate chip bagel, and I yes, it was, and I no longer partake. It's been extracted from my diet and that is bread. So that's one of those things. Bread and pasta was huge for me. I just didn't wanna have that a part of my diet anymore, and so it's helped me in a tremendous way and I have no regrets.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, you look awesome, as everyone who knows you has said, so I'm wondering, for those listening, what are some big changes or small changes that have happened for you in 2023, and that you just do this along with us and list the things and how you've changed in the last year and our gratitude for that. Yeah, right, and so let's talk about another way to do this, too. In addition to the question we just asked each other is what are two to three new learns that have the biggest impact on you this year?
Speaker 2:For me one of the biggest learns that I had to finally just get to be a master over and I'm still not. So there's level of mastery, you know that, and so I've began to really hone in on that whole team concept. No extremely successful person is doing this solo. It may appear that they're doing it so, and I'll give you an example. So when you talk about music, typically people say, oh well, prince played it all, he did it all, he was a good businessman, he was this, he was that, he was everything right.
Speaker 2:But even Prince went through his struggle with the record industry and them not giving him what he thought was fair and him changing his name to a symbol for a time so that he could get the rights back to his songs, his music, and he needed help to get that done. And so me, knowing that, I understand that you gotta have people with you and not just behind you but on the side of you and sometimes in front of you, to help protect you, shield you from some of the dangers that you're not aware of because you're in the thick of it. And so that's what I've really just honed in on and taken a grip upon, knowing I need a good team, I need a good set of people around me and I need people that know things that I don't know and able to help me to get from point A to point B. So, yes, I've been severely working on that and I see the results and I'm smiling on the inside and now on the outside, because I know what it took for me to work on becoming team oriented.
Speaker 1:Yeah, if I may say, I was talking to Michaela, our oldest, and we were talking about 2023, I went out with her over the weekend and we were talking about you, corey. One of the things that we said Corey is such a people person. Corey is quite the socializer. What a change. And Kayla's like I can't believe it because then we went back to when that just wasn't you and it was all me and it wasn't anything at least that you were outwardly expressing. It might've been someone you were a while before, but it was suppressed for whatever reason. So teamwork and you working with people and plugging into their abilities and what wisdom they have for you and just being a sponge, is something that I've really seen in you. And so incorporating team definitely that's valid, like I totally see it. So with me, it's a little opposite. One of the things for me has been Self-acknowledgment and self-recognition.
Speaker 2:Mmm, that's a good one.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and that one doesn't come to me easy. I've gotten so used to building team and cheering other people on and All about what they want to do and just supporting that, which is something I will always do. It's innately a gift of mine that has been given to me. So there's that. But on the flip side, I no longer talked about the things that I created or the, the abilities I have and what I bring to the table and what my services are and how people benefit from them. I took humility to the extreme right Thinking. That's not humble. It actually sounds very big-headed. So I, this year, have learned it is okay that these are the things that I do and there should not be any shame in it, and there is no shame in that. So just Taking credit for what's mine, yeah, yeah, why not Absolutely? So that's been a breakthrough, for sure, and that came on Later on in the year, but either way, it's still 2023.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and so another one of mine, and I'm proud to even share this, because the team thing was huge, right, that was one of those breakthrough moments. But, as you said, I was not in that vein, let's say, three to five years ago, and and so I had to get some counseling, coaching, therapy, therapizing myself, talking about it myself, going through the understanding of why I was not in that team mode and, yes, I was there before, in the earlier stage in life. But I realized I had grown bitter. I realized that I had grown into a shell of a person that I was at one point in time, because of hurt and relationships collapsing and relationships not thriving and People turning on me and me turning on people. I'm not just gonna put it on everybody else.
Speaker 2:You know, I did my fair share of Overthinking and telling myself the story or the narrative that I thought was true and then Acting upon that, and sometimes it was true and sometimes most of the time it wasn't. I had, I was flawed. I mean, we all are flawed, but I I was flawed in a way that was allowing me to see what I wanted to see and not what was actually happening. So I did close myself off and so for a long time that's the way I lived, just not really wanting people around me and close to me because I felt like I was gonna be hurt. And then that epiphany hit me and I needed to learn how to be that person again. So it took me some time to relearn how to be a people person, relearn how to be a team member and teammate and even sometimes a coach, because Sometimes I was the head of that team.
Speaker 1:So yeah, I'm gonna hear when you say that. The question that comes to my mind now I'm doing this kind of backward but Like, what's a counterintuitive approach that you haven't considered that might accelerate your progress? So, in other words, you had closed off because of Hurt that you'd experienced and, counterintuitively, you said you know what it's worth me Getting out of this self Protection mode, because is it really protecting me at this point? Right? So you do the counterintuitive thing. To get to the next thing. Does that make sense?
Speaker 2:Absolutely, and that's so spot-on. You know, you realize, in this protection You're actually hurting, causing more harm than than good by trying to protect, by Attempting to protect yourself, because the effort's not really there, you're just not active.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, um, man, that covers a lot of things like what perceived weakness can you turn into a unique advantage? That one has helped me a lot, because usually people function in the language of excuses, like I can't do this because of this, or if only this were this way, then I could do that. So you just kind of go into, if there were no setbacks or obstacles, like what would be the thing or things that you'd wanna do, and then you go into the questions about how might you look at these viewed setbacks as opportunities for growth. It's kind of it's changing your mindset, right? Everything is about how your mind perceives things.
Speaker 2:Absolutely. Who walks around being afraid of being hurt? Someone that's been hurt, right. So do you convince yourself that you can not be hurt? Absolutely not. You're gonna experience hurt in life Everyone does and so, instead of pretending that you're so strong that you can stop that, accept the fact that this is a part of life and keep on moving.
Speaker 1:Yeah, exactly. One more amazing question that I'm asking us, and especially people listening, is what am I embracing? Those discomforting moments, or just that discomfort period, lead to breakthroughs in your personal professional life. Breakthroughs is a huge word for me, and so I just recalled the discomfort I had and how I could win over it by making it the thing to cause a breakthrough, right. So, and then you think, okay, I can continue to stay in this space. What is it really gonna do for me?
Speaker 1:If I wanna continue to not win in this area, I could do exactly what I'm doing now, because that's what I'm winning in is not winning. But if I want to chase this dream, if I've got a purpose that I know is just right there and it's a matter of me taking the steps forward, how might I embrace that discomfort? And what have I gone through before? That's been about discomfort and I got through it just fine, and I think that's what we forget sometimes is that we all have been in discomfort. We all have had obstacles and setbacks, and resilience finds a way to get through them right. And that's the beautiful thing about resilience, is that the hope is, is that you can keep going back to those resilient moments and it gives you the strength and the wherewithal to continue where you're currently at, and I agree.
Speaker 2:But that is the key to be able to go back to those resilient moments. When you stop allowing yourself to go back to those moments where you were breaking through and winning, as you say, and you just keep dwelling on or, as one has told me in the past, keep ruminating on the bad, that's where the depression, the cloud, whatever you wanna call it creeps in, and so you're no longer acknowledging the wins and the victories, when we've all had both victories and losses.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah. So the next thing that I've learned this year that's had the biggest impact me is just learning to listen to my body, which again, is something that has been life changing for me. And I actually wrote a note to my future self and I don't know if anyone has done this, and I remember doing this in youth group and so we would write a note to our future selves for the beginning of the following year and what we would say and Corey, have you ever done anything like that?
Speaker 2:I just did it.
Speaker 1:Oh, it's such a wonderful experience. So I wrote a note to myself and I don't mind sharing it with everyone to give an idea. So this is about my health journey and I'm about to have surgery at the end of December and this is gonna be a surgery that has been much needed. So if you're a praying person to the one true God, I'd appreciate those prayers. Positive thoughts, of course, are welcome too, and so it's going to change my life Like it's gonna make it easier for me. It's gonna make me I feel like whole again. It's been a piece of me that's been missing. So, when I think about listening to my body, I wrote myself a letter my future self and this is what I said to me. Now, Thank you for listening to our body, Thank you that, because of the courageous steps that you took, we are now living a life that's healthy, no pain, we're active, we look sexy. This is great, and it's because you listened to our body.
Speaker 2:That is beautiful. That was my letter. That's nice. I really appreciate that because it gives you an insight on someone that is really trying to project something, and so that's what I wrote to myself. I wrote you just did this today. No, I wrote this I think two weeks ago, but it's just a simple note. Two words positive projection when you project positivity, that's typically what comes back to you. If you're projecting negativity, eventually that's what's gonna come back to you.
Speaker 1:I love that, because my last word for this year was attitude.
Speaker 1:I've learned how important attitude is and that may sound very foundational, but let me go somewhere with this. I work with different leaders from all walks of life at different stages in their leadership. Some are dying to get into leadership, even though we believe that everyone can be a leader in your current position or wherever you're at, and some people are driven to get that management role. So I work with emerging leaders and Corey. They're hungry, they're excited, they're sponging all new learns, applying it. There's behavior change. They're in a community.
Speaker 2:Their community's expansive. I bet you that room is on fire.
Speaker 1:Boy, I wish that you could just step in it for a few minutes. And yeah, I can only imagine. It's so life giving right and it's one of those things and you taught me this over last week where you read the glass half empty, glass half full, and this guy says it is what it is. What I care about is the jar that continues to fill me.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Right. So that's one of the jars that continues to fill me. And then you have some leaders who have been in this role and you could tell time has taken a toll. The changes that the years in it have weighed them down, or they feel like I already have this amazing position, I've arrived. So they're not excited about growth and development, right.
Speaker 1:And so you see the contrast and I just thought, wow, attitude is a huge thing. And then I thought, no matter where Corey and I go in life, no matter how big, how grand, how many dreams we continue to hit, I want to have the attitude where it's like for the first time or when you're so hungry and so eager for the thing, that you just show up every day, excited about life.
Speaker 1:So, that was my learn as your attitude. So that, really, what you shared, what can you share? Another again, don't tell me. Positive projection, Positive projection, I like that, I like that. It's definitely something I'm gonna expand and look into for the next year. Yeah, did you have anything else that you wanna share for this year and a learn that had the biggest impact? I feel like I've kinda hijacked that part.
Speaker 2:No, it's all good. No, I feel like those were the main things that I'm really focused. Well, that I was focused on and how I'm moving, shifting and operating in the tail end of 2023.
Speaker 1:Yes, that's awesome. I have to just share one more thing, sure, and then we're gonna get into our announcements and just shares that we have to bring to you. So, my team and I, we always talk about effective communication, which involves active listening. Corey, there's this one statement that really changed the level of listening and I'm a work in progress, for sure.
Speaker 1:But I had asked a question to the group that I was talking about and I said when people talk, what do they want from you as a listener? And you know people kind of shared and drilled down and went into fine detail. I said, let's generalize it what do people want from you when you're listening to them on anything? And we came up with the fact that people want to be heard and they want to be able to fully express themselves and know that you're hearing them and getting to the point of understanding them, not agreeing with them, just understanding them and giving them that space. And I thought, wow, there's all these methods to active listening being present, connecting with your senses, looking at the nonverbal cues, your tone, your volume, your pitch, and there's all these wonderful methods, but if you stick to the principle of the fact that people want to express themselves and be fully heard and understood, the methods fall into place right. So that for me is a big learn this year is focus on the principles, focus on your values, and when your focus is on the methods, sometimes we lose the important things you know. Absolutely yeah, thank you.
Speaker 1:2023.
Speaker 2:That's so funny. So we have a few announcements that we're going to make about things that have happened and things that are going to happen. So I had a really successful week in book reading and I use that word very lightly because that's what I do when I'm there but that's not what my purpose is. My purpose is to engage with children, engage with family members, young people and the art of being able to do something bigger than just exist. What does that mean? Well, say it in English Corey. That's what someone would say to me, and this is exactly what it is.
Speaker 2:I wrote a book because I love to write number one. And then I also love the fact that I learned that I could write at a very early age because of the support that was given to me, and so that's what I'm teaching younger people. That's what I'm showing to younger people that that dream and that desire has followed me all through my life, and now I'm giving it back to the community, not just any community, the community that I love so much and have a passion for. It was such a successful day on Saturday being at the San Bernardino CRC for IEHP, and I just took away a wealth of knowledge and a wealth of joy being able to do that and share with those people, those individuals.
Speaker 1:Definitely that moment with the people there, Corey. We talked about this and we caught a glimpse of the bigger picture for us. I benefited from being an IEHP member years and years ago me and my kiddos so IEHP has always been good to the family. We have experienced what a lot of the communities in the Inland Empire go through with poverty, risk of losing your home and the roof over your head, worried about clothing and getting shoes that fit, shoes that are appropriate for the weather, shoes where your children's feet are safe and they can get around. We know what those things are. And, being with the community, I just thought my breath almost got taken away in that instance because I was like this is what this is, and then I just remembered everything that we had ever done in our lives, from working in the community, working with youth. It just made so much sense and we absolutely love the people and we are about lifting them up, even to conversations about what's after this part of your life, because there's more to life than this.
Speaker 1:There's more to life than the struggles of every day. If, yeah, there, if money, if education was not a setback, what do you want to do with your life?
Speaker 2:Yeah, you know. And so, with that being said, jen is hitting on some really hard hitting points and it's just amazing, once you're in that space, what comes to you and what's revealed to you. But I have another opportunity that I'm going to be reading in Riverside at the CRC yes, I'm going to be happening on December 16th which is this coming up.
Speaker 2:Saturday, and so there's a lot of excitement going on around that, because there's more than one event taking place, and so I'm inviting personally everyone that's listening to this to come out and be a part of this event, be a part of what's happening. Besides the reading, there's going to be some other giveaways and things that the community will be a part of, and so I'm hoping that you'll stick around and hear the book. I get a chance to read it and express it the way I felt it when I wrote it and how I like to translate it, and so that's a really big part of what I'm doing right now. Another huge part of what I'm doing is, of course, my band, the Shameless Band, and I say it's my band and I'm very possessive over my things, but it's multiple people's bands and it might even be your band. You might like this band, so it's definitely yours as well.
Speaker 2:But we're going to be performing at House of Blues yet again, and it's in the Foundation Room, and that's on December 29th. If you want to get your party on before the New Year is, welcomed in December 29th at nine o'clock. Tickets are $10 in advance, 15 at the door, and you can go on event right, like I said, and purchase your tickets and I would love to see you guys there and we're going to have a great and awesome time.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and we'll have the link on our social media so you can just click right on it and get your tickets. I mean, you're saving $5 by pre-paying and we love it because you're coming towards the end of the year and like anticipating New Year's Eve, and what a way to exit 2023 with the Shameless Band at the House of Blues and Corey. The time slot you have is so much better. Right, it's at nine o'clock.
Speaker 1:The first time you all played there was 11 and that's what happened Sometimes you get the not so good hours, but when you show your talent and they're like okay, now we can put you in a better slot.
Speaker 2:Now we can give you a little grace.
Speaker 1:And everyone. It is only for an hour because they're other artists, so if you're not there on time you'll miss the hours worth. And it's not even hour, it's actually a little bit less. So it's from nine to 10 and we'll be there, and they serve food there, drinks, everything, the ambiance, the environment, the energy is amazing, so hope to see you there.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's a gorgeous room. You're not going to be disappointed. It's not a brewery and it's not yeah.
Speaker 1:If you like selfies, this is a spot, yeah, yeah. So again, that's December 29th, house of Blues in Anaheim at nine o'clock, and another important date is the 16th of this month, which is the reading of ruffles at the CRC in Riverside. For IHP, it's a good time to plug into the community and see kids who are brought into their dreams and their imagination through ruffles, and the parents totally get into it too, and that's what I love is like they're having childlike moments and just enjoying that. What a stress reliever, corey. I mean I could go on and on about the gift of ruffles and the gift of reading and books and spending time with community. There is nothing like it. And what a way to be period from this moment forward, yeah yeah, well, everyone, we love you so much and appreciate you listening to us this year. We hope that you plan on taking us with you into 2024, because you know us to take the elevator. We say look up and let's elevate Every day, elevate, elevate, elevate, everyday, everyday. 位置上ihp.