Take the Elevator
This podcast is purely about elevating people through individual life stories and experiences in the Elevator. In the Elevator, what's key is maybe changing your perspective; having self-actualization; embracing your purpose; and acting on it as we grow from one another. There is a whole different point of view when you look up to elevate.
Take the Elevator
399th Floor: Deadbeat Dog Dads And The Pet Parenting Gap
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Somebody always says, “That’s my dog”… right up until the barking starts, the mess happens, or the vet needs a call. We lean into that tension with a playful label, “deadbeat dog dads,” and then we get honest about what responsible pet parenting actually looks like when you share a home, a schedule, and two very real dogs with very different personalities.
We swap stories about our own “co-parenting” dynamic, including the funny power of a calm presence that makes dogs instantly behave, and the not-so-funny moments when you realize you don’t even know the vet’s name.
Then we talk about the overachievers, the pet parents who go all in with pet cameras, two-way audio, calming playlists, treat machines, routines, pet insurance, and even gourmet homemade dog food meal prep. We also share a terrifying coyote bite story and what recovery looks like when your dog comes home shaken, sore, and needing steady comfort. It’s a reminder that dogs have feelings, habits, and a whole language of cues, and the relationship gets better when we learn to read it.
If you love pets, dogs, animal behavior, dog training, pet anxiety solutions, and real-life pet care stories, you’ll feel seen here. Subscribe, share this with a fellow pet parent, and leave a review, then tell us: are you the “alpha,” the caretaker, or the true co-parent in your house?
https://www.fuzzyfurryforest.com
Cool Weather And Catching Up
SPEAKER_02Every day, elevate every day every day.
SPEAKER_00Hey, it's Jen the Builder and Cory. And we are together again on this one time a week. And what I love about today is that in Southern California, everyone, for those who don't live here, we're recording on a day that's about 66, 67 degrees, overcast, windy out here where we're at. And it is a treat for this kind of weather.
SPEAKER_01Absolutely. And uh one of the really cool things is it's uh threatening terrain. So, you know that cold weather where the clouds have rolled in, they're nice and thick. There's a little bit of drizzle, but it the rain just hasn't broken through yet. We're at that verge of rain, but we're not all the way to the point of precipitation.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, let's talk about rain yesterday. We had rain, and honestly, I think it was more a drizzle.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, it was just a drizzle.
SPEAKER_00And uh yeah, we we Californians were talking about it, posting about it, and that was our rain.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, that's exciting too.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, so April's coming to an end, Corey. Anything that you want to share before we proceed with what we're we think is gonna be a light, fun episode on something like deadbeat dog dads and overachieving pet parents. We're honoring our fur babies today.
Singing Together Again
SPEAKER_01Yes, to all of the fur babies and the fur babies' parents. We are going to be having a good time. So you asked me, is there anything I want to highlight? There's a couple of things I like to highlight. I want to highlight this podcast. You know, a lot of people know we do podcasts, they know we have this uh amazing platform that we uh endure every week for the most part. But what people don't know is that, and this is a really silent thing that's been happening in the background for a couple of months now, and Jen has no clue that I'm about to announce this or even put this out there. But we have been successfully singing and playing together for a few weeks now, and it's been a lot of fun. So we we've we've tapped into yet another part of our creative and exciting uh tool bag of things to do and and have fun with gin. And I I've just been really enjoying that. So um minus you know, playing on Saturday nights at bars and uh clubs and stuff like that. Uh, I still get to sing and play and have a good time. And I know we've mentioned it before that we were, you know, in that vein, but we've been actually doing it. So yeah, that that's one of my highlights.
SPEAKER_00Oh, I love that. Yeah, it has been a blast. Um, and something that I thought we were never gonna do, and quite honestly, and I am really enjoying it and grateful to have it back in our lives.
SPEAKER_01Indeed.
SPEAKER_00For sure. Um, let's see. Uh quick highlight for me. Um there's a big event that we're kind of closing off at work, and I've had almost 10 different sessions with different leaders. And Corey, we were talking about conflict resolution in one of the sessions. And have you ever heard of the orange story? No, have not. Oh, I hope I hope you enjoy this, and I hope our friends um find joy in it. So remember, the topic is conflict resolution, and so one of the leaders shared about the orange story. So there was one orange left in a bakery, and you have the master baker, and then a couple of Sioux type of bakers, right? And each baker, each Sioux baker has a project or actually a cake that they need to make for one of their for their clients, and they're picking it up that very same day. Well, there's only one orange in the kitchen, and they're like, Who's gonna get it? I need it more, and here's why. So they start going into conflict. So the master chef comes in and says, Well, um, chef, on this one side, what do you need it for? And he says, Well, I need the peel, I need the zest of it. I absolutely need the zest, or else it's just not gonna work. And the master says to the other chef, what do you need? She says, Well, I need the juice. Uh my my recipe calls for juice and needs to have it. She goes, Well, there you have it. We have one orange and you each need something different. So it wasn't really a conflict once they talked about it. You see what I'm saying? Mm-hmm. Yeah, so that's the orange story. Okay, loved it. Anyhow, I geek, I geek out on things like that.
SPEAKER_01So if you were just as lost as I was, don't feel like something went wrong there. I was just like, huh?
SPEAKER_00The orange based, okay. Let me let me basically we think we're in conflict, but when we get to talking about it, it's really not as bad as we think at times.
SPEAKER_01Ding, ding, ding, ding. The light just came on.
SPEAKER_00Okay. And I thought I was just gonna be able to deliver it, and then there could be all these takeaways, but I get it. It was out of left field, but it was something that I just loved.
Deadbeat Dog Dads Defined
SPEAKER_01I love it. I love it. So, Jim, what's today's episode really about?
SPEAKER_00All right, so we wanted to kind of take a playful look at deadbeat dog dads. So these are for baby parents who say they love their dog. And Corey, we've got dogs.
SPEAKER_01Yes, two of them.
SPEAKER_00Yes, Penny and Talula. So cute. But then I hear these stories from my friends that these dads or moms, I'm not picking on men, but it's just funner to say deadbeat dog dads, you see, because there's three Ds there, anyhow. But they mysteriously disappear when it's time for responsibility.
SPEAKER_01Yes, Jen. And and I will speak first to this because, you know, as a dog dad, uh, I have to speak up when I am um, yes, and not carrying.
SPEAKER_00Do you feel like we're talking about you? Yes, I do.
SPEAKER_01No, I I don't feel like you're talking about me, but what I will say is that Jen is an awesome dog parent, and I give her all the credit in the world because uh she does the hard parts of the raising of the dogs. I get to play alpha male in the house and you know present my dominance and they watch them do what they what I tell them to do. But the hard work, the cleaning, the feeding, the walking or playing with them, the spending time with that that's all gin. So uh yeah, you might be talking about me just enough today.
SPEAKER_00Oh well, you know, my one question, and it isn't necessarily about you. One of the questions that it comes to mind is why is it some people claim their dog, right? Love their dog, oh, it's my dog, especially when they're only clean and being cute.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. That's a real thing, right there. Like, if you ever come to a person's house when their dog has just been clean, they're like, Oh, he's so cute, he's so this, he's so that, and they're like picking them up and hugging them and kissing on them. But come over on a day when the dog is dirty and being a little bit rambunctious, it's like, go to your room, kennel, kennel, go to your kennel, right?
SPEAKER_00Or Jen, get your dog, right? Then it becomes it's your dog, not our dog kind of thing. I love your when you said that you take an alpha present. It's so funny, this house, because I'm over here pleading with one of the dogs, like, come on. So we have a two-story house and it's wood floors. And our oldest dog, Penny, when she sees me up the stairs, she'll just come running up, right? No problem. Our other dog, Tulula, is more princess, like really finicky and not sure of herself, and very spoiled, kind of. So um, she had had a couple of slipping accidents. So I get it. She slipped a couple of times.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, there's some PS uh PTSP with uh going upstairs. Now going down, she's good.
SPEAKER_00But going up, yeah. So she'll go up two stairs, and it looks like you're like, yes, come on, you got this, you're doing good, and then she'll turn around and go back down the stairs and look up at you, like, aren't you gonna come get me? Um, but when the dogs, like if I need to let them out to go potty or something needs to happen and they're not listening because they want to play, I kind of I think I bring that energy a lot with them. You'll come or I'll get you and say, just like a dad, Corey, can you come here and tell them, you know, and then you'll stand there and they'll just kind of look and then do what they're supposed to do. Ah, I love it.
Vet Stress And A Coyote Scare
SPEAKER_01Yeah, that's a really good feeling. I can't lie. You know, if when you come out of the room and the dogs are not obeying per se, uh being compliant, but your very presence prompts them to just do what they're supposed to do. That's a really good feeling, you know? And and I don't yell at them. I don't I'm not a you know a harsh just your presence. Yeah, it's just you know, and I don't even know that I'm in myself doing anything but showing up.
SPEAKER_00Right. The f well I'm gonna share another uh favorite story that I have with you and Penny, but let's first talk about the signs of a deadbeat dog deal. So they post pictures. I see this a lot on social media, and I hear from my friends, but they don't even go buy the dog food. Right? So that there's a sign of it.
SPEAKER_01Not guilty of that one. Thank God. Okay, we're starting off on a good foot here.
SPEAKER_00Yep. Um, I've got one, and then we could just kind of um ping pong it back and forth. Sure. So definitely calls a dog like my son, my fur baby, but don't e they don't even know the dog's vet's name. Or yeah.
SPEAKER_01Okay, or even if the if there is a vet. Right. You know, a lot of people don't know, and and it's it's a real thing. We had to take Tulula to the vet, and uh I was pretty clueless on what to do, where to go, how to get this done.
SPEAKER_00Oh, honey, you you kind of panicked and no fen uh no disrespect, but you sh um shut down when you saw that she was injured.
SPEAKER_01Well, I remember I didn't know she was injured. So basically what happened, I'll just give you the story. Something uh went down in the backyard, and at this time we didn't know. Yeah, and so uh Talula came into the um group.
SPEAKER_00I was calling them in.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. So she took a very long time to come into the house. And when she came into the house, she was walking very slow or her head held down.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I'm so sad.
SPEAKER_01And I was like, what's going on? What's happening? And then she walked directly up to me, which is not normal. She does not normally just walk to me. She'll run to you or to Nate, but um, she was walking towards me and I was like, What are you doing back up? And so I kind of like like motioned for her to back up, but she was hurt, and what we found out later is that a coyote had bit her and attempted to take her away, and um, yeah, she was in a whole lot of pain. So I at that moment I really didn't know what to do because I seen the the blood and the side of her neck, and I'm like, oh my god.
SPEAKER_00That was terrifying, it was terrifying.
SPEAKER_01Um so let's let's go into a story real quick and then we'll go back to the deadbeat stuff. Well, you said you had a good one that you like to tell of, and I don't I don't know what this one is, so I'm excited.
SPEAKER_00Well, yes, I will tell the story, but I'm wanted to finish my list on the signs of a deadbeat. Oh dog dad.
SPEAKER_01I thought we would go back and forth.
SPEAKER_00Um, well, yeah. Do you have one lit? Do you have one? Uh this is where we try to come together real time, folks. Uh-oh. Go ahead with your list. Well, I've seen two um where people sleep through barking and the whining, especially when you have a new baby dog and they're being trained.
SPEAKER_01See, I feel and felt that it's imperative for you to talk your dog through this moment of because usually when you have a new dog, uh, they they have some anxiety, obviously, because they've come from a di another home and their routine has been messed up. And and especially as a puppy, um, I just feel it's important to talk your dog through that moment until they begin to understand that things are gonna be alright and everything will be, you know, a little bit better. You know, I just talk them through it, and that tends to work, you know, um, especially during the daytime. Now at night when everybody's trying to sleep, you almost have to just sleep through it because you can't be up all night and not getting good rest uh when a dog is getting used to a new environment.
Overachieving Pet Parent Habits
SPEAKER_00Yeah, for sure. Said the chew dog dad. Yes, so cute. Okay, let me share this story about someone that we know, and they have a dog who had anxiety whenever they left for work, right? And so what our friend did was they installed a pet camera, put a speaker system, and added a calming music playlist on their um, I don't want to say her name out loud, A-L-E-E-XA. Right. Oh yeah. Yes. And so this dog dad would leave notes during the day to the dog or get on the speaker and say, you know, things like, hey buddy, I'm at work, you're doing great, I'll see you soon.
SPEAKER_01Now I'm laughing, but I do talk to the dogs on a on the camera in the backyard, and I'll go on there.
SPEAKER_00I love watching that.
SPEAKER_01I go on there and I see them, you know, barking at something or you know, being rambunctious, and I'll start talking to them and then they'll they'll calm down. Uh, so I can relate to that. You know, I there would have been a time when I would have thought that was really extreme, and like, what the heck are you thinking? Why would you do it? But now I get it, I totally get it.
SPEAKER_00So you would have called that before an overachieving dog dad.
SPEAKER_01I really would have, but now I see the importance of giving your fur babies reassurance that you're you're there or that you can see them and you can hear them, and then they feel a little bit more comfort comforted and at peace. So yeah.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Oh, it's so super cute to see the playlist come on. I've seen too on social media where they have automatic dog treat giving machines. Like every so often the machine is prompted to give the dog a treat.
SPEAKER_01Oh, really?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, and so when the dog comes up to the treat, the camera's right there and they're able to interact that way.
SPEAKER_01Oh, that's cool.
SPEAKER_00Yes. Now, one thing that we don't do, and no judgment on people who do do this, um, is there are parents who have birthday parties for their dogs.
SPEAKER_01Now that would be amazing, and and I say that because, you know, Jen, we we do a lot of really fun creative activities, and when it comes to the books, we have book birthday parties, so I can very well see how you would give your dog a birthday party. And to Penny was actually born on the same day as my mom. So that's why I really don't do that because my mom is not gonna compete with the dog, that's for sure.
SPEAKER_00Oh, I you know what I appreciate about your mom when I hear you talking to her about the the dogs, is you call them her grandgrandchildren. Yeah. And when she stayed with us for a little bit, oh, she just loved on them and she'd bring them treats. And even after she moved out, yeah, she would bring them treats. And um, and I love the boundaries she set. You know, some people don't want to hold dogs, and that's okay. Right. Um, she was able to care for for them in in her own way, and they just would go crazy about her.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, they fell in love with her.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, so sweet. Um, for baby excellence, Buddha is we've got at our the company we work at, and gosh, we're so grateful for the benefits there. Is there's pet insurance?
SPEAKER_01Yes, it is, and we do take uh advantage of not only the insurance, but some of the luxuries that come along with that pet insurance. So um it's it's just one of those things you want to try to give your animal, um, your pet, your fur baby, whatever you want to call them. You want to give them the best quality of life while they're here, just like you know, we have a good quality of life. So we don't want them to ever feel like they're not being taken care of, they're not being fed, they're not being having their health needs met. Um, when we brought these animals to our home, we we intended on treating them just as good as we treat each other, you know. They have feelings, they have they cry. That's the biggest thing, you know. If an animal's an animal can cry, uh you know it has feelings, and so I don't want to hurt the animal's feelings or hurt them.
SPEAKER_00Right.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Speaking of feelings, some dogs really love their homemade food. So we have yeah, we have people in our lives that beautifully meal prep the same way Corey, you and I melt meal prep for ourselves. Um, they're doing this for their dogs, and it's like legit gourmet meals, pieces of chicken, lamb, salmon, and they're they are eating the best of foods.
SPEAKER_01Yes, as the Filipino culture says, hob hubbing.
Grooming Routines Food And Insurance
SPEAKER_00They're hub hubbing. Um, another thing that I we see too, it is parents who take the time to train to walk and groom their dogs consistently. Um, I see in the neighborhood this uh trailer who comes around to their clients and grooms their pets right there at home in their trailer. Now we used to do that with our dogs, but again, Talula, Miss Princess, you know, real picky about who she lets in her space, that wasn't happening.
SPEAKER_01That wasn't working well at all.
SPEAKER_00Penny, Penny was looking sharp. Oh, yeah. And Penny looked forward to it.
SPEAKER_01She likes being pampered and and touched and pet and uh taken care of, yeah. But Telula just wasn't having it.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, yeah. So I didn't give up all the goods on what I was gonna bring up in this episode, and it's something about you. Um, you know, we didn't have dogs before because Corey, you've had some incidences with dogs, although you had dogs growing up, yeah. And um, you said, you know, Jen, yeah, let's go ahead and have dogs, but they've got to be small, not nothing big or you know, and I said, Great. So we had we got our dogs penny first and then Tulula maybe a year or two later.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, about a year and a half, yeah.
SPEAKER_00And um, oh gosh, the story just slipped my mind.
SPEAKER_01Well, while you're thinking about that, so yes, I wanted I wanted to give dogs a chance again, but I wanted to give them a chance from being born, opposed to getting a dog that's already been matured and developed, because I wanted to build that relationship from the start. Um that would ease my comfort from the uh incidences that I had experienced.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. What I appreciate about our time now is um how you were so tickled by the fact that we know our dog's personalities and like with certain looks or certain sounds they make or their body language, we're able to understand what they're communicating.
SPEAKER_01Right.
SPEAKER_00And um you've been watching some reels about smart animals, and you just um get lost in it, and you're actually very in awe of how animals communicate.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I've been learning, and this was really strange. And and if you get a chance to do this, guys, look at the YouTube videos where the owners are talking to their cats in cat language, it's amazing. And then some of the dogs just I mean, and I had to see this for myself in our dogs, but your dogs will literally tell you what. They need to do what they want to do, and then give you a response if you ask them a question because they begin to understand, you know, if it's especially if it's food based, they they will give you a response really quick.
Recovery Bonding And Pet Language
SPEAKER_00Yeah. So another story that I wanted to share was um a person that we know again not only has a routine for their dogs, but planned their whole work schedule and their lives around their dog having surgery. And when the dog came home post-surgery, she laid with him the whole time while he was recovering. And I just thought that was so sweet. They had like um videos and pictures of while this was happening and the healing process. And it reminded me of when Tulela came home, and that was scary, guys.
SPEAKER_01It was scary because where she had got bit um by a coyote, it was on her neck, centimeters away from uh main artery or vein or whatever it's called.
SPEAKER_00Her um, you know, her throat, her breathing, yeah. And so the doctor had to check to make sure because if there was damage there, we would have had to put her down, yeah, put her to sleep. So I remember our adult children were like, what does that mean? Because you know, it's like the thought of having that happen. So anyways, when she came home to recover, she was so you know, of course, lethargic and just laying there and her big eyes, and she was recovering. And I remember I was working and she was in the room with me, and then I just went over and laid by her, and I said it's gonna be okay. And I just started crying because I felt so bad for her, and then it was great because what was it, two, three days later? Then she started like, I want out of this kennel, you know, she's making it be known.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, she had she was uh sleeping in a kennel, she had a cone around her neck so she couldn't bite at the the wound. And for once, and if you know me, you know I don't have a problem with saying that uh this particular dog, Tulula, is not my favorite of the two. She's a little bit on the on the pressy side, as Jen says, and that's that can become annoying after a while for me. But she just really warmed up to me, and I began to connect with her in a whole nother way because she wasn't so about what she wants to do in her own little you know attitude. So I got a chance to know her on a different level, and um we we we started the bonding process.
Dog Dad Scorecard And Listener Stories
SPEAKER_00I love it, I love it. Well, we're gonna end this episode with this. And so if you can say yes to these questions, great for you. If there's a possibly no PAW, get it possibly no.
SPEAKER_01Um She's doing paw jokes now, guys.
SPEAKER_00Uh, maybe it's something you can get involved in. So do you know your dog's bet's name? No. Okay. So maybe we can share that information. Um, have you ever scheduled an appointment for your dog? No. All right. Um, who buys the food? Have you ever bought oh yeah, I've bought food on many of occasions. Okay. Um, who wakes up early or cleans up messes when they happen?
SPEAKER_01I've been known to clean up some messes.
SPEAKER_00You have. Yeah. Yeah, you have. So good on you, Corey. It's a joint effort after all. It is co-parenting for our fur babies, who we love very much. Um, and gosh, I wish this was a kind of two-way street because I know people out there listening right now probably have really great stories about their fur babies.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, and I I mean, I like you said, I wish there was a way we could have that dialogue, but I want to hear about the cats, I want to hear about the birds, I want to hear about all, and I know some of you you guys out there have the extreme exotic pets, like lizards and snakes, iguanas, and all that kind of stuff, hamsters and exotic as a hamster, guinea pig.
SPEAKER_00Oh yeah, it's an exotic guinea pig.
SPEAKER_01Hey, I don't know what exotic exoticism is anymore. But I want to hear about all those stories and all those animals. So if you can, please drop us a note or a line on your pet and your your how you've uh had an experience with them because that would be so fun to tell you know your story on our podcast.
SPEAKER_00I love that. And of course, as you all know, we're children's book authors, and we have our own fur babies there too on the Fuzzy Furry 4 series. Um, we've got bunnies and foxes and alligators, so yeah, and our most snakes our most exotic animal, an owl. Yes, and um our next book is actually going to be released within three months, and that one is really, really fun, and I don't want to give it up, yeah. But um I think doing that series has really given us an appreciation and um a desire to research animals and see how they interact and and know their different characteristics, right? So for me and my today, this is my takeaway and my message to everyone is um just how important showing care is, whether it be to your fur babies, to each other, is you know, let's show care consistently.
SPEAKER_01Um, so I guess mine would be learn the dialogue of your pet and try to understand them just a little bit better and see how that relationship evolves from that point. Beautiful.
SPEAKER_00Well, we hope y'all have a good week and you know us to take the elevator. We say, look up and let's elevate.
SPEAKER_01And for all the dogs, you know that's a thing, right?
SPEAKER_00Is it for yeah, the younger generation? Meow. I thought it was ka chow. Now it's meow. Check it out.
SPEAKER_01Okay, elevat every day.
