Embracing Your True Intimacy with Melisa Keenan

 Transformation. Having the ability to start again and accessing the most powerful version of yourself is sometimes intimidating. 

My guest this week has done just that stepped through the many challenges of life. She now supports others as they embrace more of their true intimacy with themselves empowering you to live the life you've always dreamed of.

My guest today is Melisa Keenan. Melisa is the go to intuitive intimacy expert for the top 100% who helps high powered female CEOs use their feminine energy as a 10 time growth strategy. She is a CEO, keynote speaker and an international and USA Today Best Selling Author after investing nearly 200,000k In certifications and training, plus overcoming traumatic relationship experiences. Melisa understands the female CEO feeling trapped in the masculine. She helps her gain time, freedom, intimacy and fulfillment without losing momentum. She enjoys dancing, singing, working and praying at her hobby ranch in Northern Nevada, where she lives with her husband CJ and their four children.

Insights to add to your spiritual toolbox from this episode:

1. Breaking away from the "norm"

2. Being "in tune" with yourself

3. Understanding the "lack" women hold onto

4. Suffering & relating to the masses

5. Achieving more abundance in your life

6. Intuitively directed

7. Experiencing intimacy in a variety of ways

8. Old lineage patterns and breaking them wide open

9. How to bring forward parts of yourself that has been repressed

10. Embracing more of you in your business and life

Check out Melisa's Website, Facebook, LinkedIn, YouTube

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Transcript

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17:40

and welcome. Thank you. So I really feel like there's a dive deep into let's talk about empowering yourself and people in the business that they're at today. Because we're in this place where everything's kind of still up in the air unfolding. What does it look like for each person and really stepping into their feminine energy, intimacy and that sensuality that you bring out so beautifully in your clients? So I'd like to start there and I would love for you to share with my listeners how you access this in your life for your journey and what you work with your clients. Okay, that's a loaded question. The loaded gun Melisa, let's just boom the loaded gun. I've been thinking about this morning. This is kind of funny but tied to what you're asking. I keep have the song stuck in my head. Do you love me from Fiddler on the Roof? Oh, yeah. No. Do you know that movie and play and all that I just love it. I want to see it live so so badly, that's a goal. Um, but it's funny because even in their super traditional lifestyle that it highlights the the nature of their relationship was really masculine energy. It's like, you know, arranged marriages, they didn't choose. They didn't get to consult their heart they and so there's that sweet moment. Where the husband is like, Yeah, but do you love me? And then she fills in with all these tasks, these masculine energy tasks that she has done for him their whole lives, and it's just so sweet. Yeah, but do you love me? And I think um, you know, I think that that whole show highlights the change in society and the change in a culture and a religion and all of that, but it's very applicable to us today. So we're you're saying even in our business, in our in our careers, it's almost like the world is asking. Yeah, but do you love it? And and even in our marriages, and yet do you love it? And are you doing the things you love? Or are you just doing the things because it's the things you were thought you were supposed to be doing? In it feels like even you know, since COVID, and it kind of jarred people into this sense of, wait a minute, I don't even like what I'm doing. Do I even like who I am. And I see this really often. So I primarily work with high level business owners, the top 2% And I see this a lot with them too. Am I doing the things that I love or am I just doing the things? Is my is my inner compass. directing me towards things that are actually going to create a fulfilled life or my have have I shifted my inner compass over here, just to increase the bottom line and just to do the next right steps to grow my business. So I'm so then to answer your next question, which I think was how do we then access this? How do I access this for myself? Is that what you said? Yeah, I asked you if you could share your journey of how you got to where you're at right now. In assisting others on their journeys so um, I think my journey started even before I was born. My my ancestry is just full of pain and heartache and people who were very confused and hurting and acting out in pain. And so the women in my ancestry were, you know, very oppressed, and very disempowered. But it's funny the men the men were the persecutors but I think they were also very oppressed in a different way, and hurting and confused. And so, and so I was born into this really chaotic atmosphere, where Christianity was, like the insurance, like maybe if we can just do this Christian thing and do it really, really well. Then we will eventually figure it out. You know, which I just think is so, so sad. i And I love Christ. I feel like I can talk about all these things on your show, because it's definitely spirituality but I love Christ and I actually do have a religion that I subscribe to. I'm a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, but um, but I think Jesus must be looking at a lot of us and thinking, you're making this so hard and you've twisted this so, so different from what I ever intended it to be, you know, so I was born into that and had a very difficult childhood drugs and abuse and addiction and violence, you know, calling the cops on my parents and and then my adultery and eventually, my parents divorce and then my mom My mom moved out my dad was given full custody of me. And just shortly after that, he was diagnosed with cancer and had three months left to live and died three months later. And so I went and moved in then with my aunt and uncle. And really, you know, because we're having those kinds of experiences so young, I was just constantly being asked, like by the universe, like what do you believe? What do you stand for? And I was constantly brought to these positions of being very abandoned and neglected and alone, which had me asking like, what, where is the hope and in that aloneness, finding hope, like I wasn't really ever alone. And so that formed the whole foundation for my spiritual seeking and spiritual journey. Fast forward, I was about 18 and I joined the church that I now am a member of and, and it helped me open up my heart again to the idea of family I really did not want a family which probably Hindsight is just didn't want to continue to repeat everything that I had experience. And and instead in the Mormon faith, you know, family is super integral and the teachings on family are so beautiful. It just opened my heart and so instead I jumped in with both feet and by 25 had three kids ages four and under all in diapers and, and then my husband came to me and let me know that he had had a secret addiction. Our entire marriage, literally that I was blind to. And I asked him to move out. We were separated for six months. So during that six months, I was like, I repeated exactly what I didn't want to have happen in my life. That was where I was, it was I was diagnosed with PTSD. It was so intense. Just thinking, Where did I go wrong? And how could I be back in this situation? And feeling so alone again, and abandoned and neglected and betrayed. And now I have three little kids looking up to me. Trying to, you know, that I've got to have answers for and I had no answers. And it was in that place that I really gained a new conviction that I was just going to create happiness and fullness for myself. And for my life, regardless of what anyone else around me did. And and so that began my true personal development journey. And it was so shocking to me, because, as most kids when you go through horrible things in your childhood, you assume it's your fault. So I had approached everything up to that point, from a space of like, I'm broken, I have to really fix myself in order to like survive this life. And it was so shocking to me that from that place of like total surrender, I was continually shown that I was wonderful, and that the answers could be found within me. And how else was I going to hear God's voice besides by loving this vessel that I get the answers through? And so ended up going through my own eating disorder recovery and just waking up so much to the beauty of life and my own spiritual gifts. And my husband also chose to work really hard on himself and found recovery. And, and so we came back together and it took probably another two years before we really knew that we had made the right choice by staying together. It was so hard so often, we would have we would say like, I think it would have been easier if we just gotten divorced in so many ways, because we had to rebuild a marriage with a new foundation but with the same person, the one who had hurt you, who had lied, who had and then I was able to see my part I had been become so micromanaging and controlling and perfectionistic because of my my experience of my younger life. So So coming back together from that and building from a new foundation was very hard, but I remember looking at him one day and just feeling like oh my gosh, like I feel so connected to this other human being and I feel so full and connected to myself. And I finally feel like I understand like my role as a mother too, and was like, I didn't know that intimacy and family and connection. could feel like this. I had never seen it model before. And my husband said the same thing like oh my god, we didn't even know what we were trying to create. We just knew it had to be better. than what we were experiencing. And when we were experiencing it was like we didn't know it could be this great and that's where my conviction came to start working with women and couples and individuals around intimacy. So you know, certifications and etc. Later here I am. Oh, thank you. So much for sharing all of that, Melisa, what a journey and it seems to me that you were definitely breaking a lot of that lineage. And a lot of that old stuff for your the generations to come your children, your grandchildren to come and what a beautiful journey. Thank you and also staying with the man and the person whose sole connection that you have come to really work with because oftentimes, like you said, I mean, I really believe that we all have connections with one another and there are times when we do stay together and there are times when we go our separate ways. And but working through and having that beautiful foundation for your children again for the future generations, and working through things what I mean what a gift, definitely. I'm so grateful. Like, I'm just so grateful. And I feel like part of why our intimacy is so strong and this is a part that we can only catalyze a little bit for the couples that we work with and for the individuals I work with, because it has to really come from within but it was because we really witnessed each other's darkness. And we found like a love and acceptance in the midst of that even parts of us that have really hurt each other it what it's not the same thing as just laying over and being a doormat and like letting somebody abuse you but it's it's this like mutual like honoring of the human and the soul that you have said yes to and then and then both of us honoring ourselves, that that just continues to bless us. It's like we I think in the beginning we thought we were trying to just recreate the joy that we had when we first got married. Because we were so smitten you know we were also in college and completely naive. Right? Come to this place of like full transparency. You know, we we got a client right now. We've been working with for some time and and just now he has shared, he had a secret that he was going to take to his grave. That wasn't even about this current wife. This couple that we're working with it was about a previous relationship, and he finally has unburdened himself of this thing and gone and made amends with those involved and now his relationship with his wife is like night and day 360 difference. And I just don't think people realize how much like when we feel like we have to hide stuff, how much that takes us away from our center. So So coming to that place of like fully seeing and knowing each other just absolutely makes all the difference in the world without a doubt. And I would love for you to talk a little bit about true intimacy because you call it into me see, can you share a little bit about that? Yeah, I think often people hear the word intimacy and they just automatically think sex and sex is one aspect of intimacy, physical intimacy, but it is this into me see, and I think it's we don't talk about it enough and and it's that's damaging so much so that I often get people for one usually the word intimacy scares people. So if you're listening right now and you're thinking like you're feeling kind of tight, it's actually more normal for the collective than not. And because we don't talk about it very much, we don't really label like, what it is or what it feels like or when we're experiencing it. We don't even necessarily know when we've got it or what it is that we might work toward it. Really is that closeness, it involves that vulnerability. It's a connection and it happens on many layers. Emotionally, yes, physically, spiritually, even. I, I look at the world through the lens of intimacy. So in my world everything is a relationship and I'm in relationship with everything. So I can be experiencing intimacy with my house plants or with the dirt outside or with the stars, with my children, with my husband, with my friends with my clients with my team. Or I can be in all of those situations and experiencing no intimacy at all. And it's simply a matter of me deciding to be in that open space. And, and, and the other thing that I would say about that is that we can't ever experience true intimacy without first having safety and trust. So, usually, when we think of safety and trust, we think that our external environment has to create that and while we definitely need that, it's less dependent on that than we give that credit. It's really more an internal safety and trust. So that's why intimacy with myself is like first priority. Can I be with my emotions, or do I run from them? Can I be with the decisions I've made? Can I understand myself? Can I understand my relation to the things that have happened in my life? Do I like who I'm being as a business owner? Do I like who I am being in my relationships? That's intimacy with yourself first. And we're really only able to experience that kind of depth of intimacy with another to the level at which we've gone with ourselves. And oftentimes, especially women, the women that I work with and talk to you on a regular basis will say, like, I just I feel like people only appreciate me for what I can do for them. Right? That's a very common feeling. In our current society, the way that things run, I just feel like people don't really see me they don't really know me, they only appreciate me for what I can do for them, whether that's a spouse, or it's in business, or in the world at large. And typically, this is this is because do you see you if you want people to deeply see you, to hear you to know you, and to appreciate you for simply who you're being you have to be able to show them your beingness rather than just only showing them what you can do and that starts by you seeing you and I think that's where like you mentioned earlier how things have broken us out open since COVID. And that that's where people are stepping into or moving into because the outer is not supporting the inner like that beautiful mirror. It's I mean, I feel to that like all that's going on in the outer world and all the chaos and craziness etc, which honestly is always going on in different levels in different scenarios. But that's a reflection of how people are feeling inside. So like you're mentioning when you really get in tune with yourself and that intimacy of who you are as a soul a spirit, a loving being then the outer changes and I just I really have complete hope for humanity. I believe that we are moving that way there are so many of us on the planet now that are really emphasizing and sharing with people how to embrace this intimacy how to embrace love, the Christ you know, energy everything and like just bringing that collectively into what we're here to do and be right now and being in tune with yourself like you mentioned and you know, is really key and the more that people can hear this information and work with me, you know, beautiful souls like you and what you're doing, helps them move forward. So I want to bring this conversation into work because we've talked about ourselves about being intimate about you know, being in tune with ourselves. So now I'd like you to share a little bit about how that affects the business that people are in and what they're offering the world. Is this so huge and I'm going to make an assumption that your listeners probably are on board with some version of this sort of mentality around what's happening in our world right now, which is we are shifting to a more feminine or Aquarian Age, and there is a great awakening happening. And so if you look right now in the business world, really, in our world at large, who are those who are super important, and what were the steps that it took them how did they get to be a super important person air quotes it's it's not because of their integrity. It's not because of the core of who they are. It's not we don't really know what's on their insides Right. Um, and I believe that because of this shift we're experiencing in society, there will come a time when our insights will be more apparent to all of us because we're all waking up to those spiritual gifts. And we're all getting more in tune with our intuition. And we're going to see right through these people who have only self interest involved, right? So if we're going to continue to run our business and think that bro marketing and this masculine energy way of simply being transactional with people, you know, not really letting people know who you are, who the face of the company is, especially if you're a service provider, but I think I think in all positions your people are gonna see right through you. We are we are being called to this deeper level of connection, and those who can't hang I don't think they're going to continue to be in positions of leadership. So So there's my macro answer to that when we look at a business owner, business is all about relationships. And we've been saying that from the beginning, but we still have a masculine flair to that masculine energy. I'm not I'm not when I say masculine energy. I'm not dogging men. I'm talking about Yang I'm talking about Yang ways of being that we've done forever and ever. We know that business is about relationships, but we don't really fully practice that. It's like a surfacey layer of relationships. So often when a client comes to me and you know, they come to me probably because there's something's going on in their marriage or they want to be married. They're looking for a partner, a soul companion and, and then we also work on their business and some of the things that will come up if you struggle with intimacy is like, well, you don't really trust your team. Because there hasn't been those deeper layers of connection. You haven't really given space for emotion within yourself or within your team. There's not that deeper layer of consideration you also may have situations where your clients walk away unsatisfied, or you get the sense that your clients talk about you behind your back. And again, it's like, well, they don't really feel like they can come and tell you so they're just gonna complain. And it's usually not because you didn't provide what you said you were gonna provide. It was more around how you made them feel during the experience. So so some of these like very practical things, it's like people actually just want you. So if you're feeling like people only value me because of what I can do. Why don't you try taking a risk and show your heart a little more and show a little bit more of who you are, and actually be interested in the people that you're working with, and hear a little bit about who they are and just watch how that changes things. There's some really neat programs out there right now that are encouraging corporations to transition to like fully autonomous and I'm not going to pretend that I really understand all the inner workings of running a corporation. In my work. I don't need to because I depend on the intuition of my client. And my client. She knows exactly how to run her Corporation, and especially when she taps into her intuition. But some of these programs are so cool because it's it's like bringing this oneness and equality to all members. There is no more hierarchy. And and it's fascinating. I'm working with a company right now and it's like every individual on the organization. You would you would be hard pressed to know which one was the CEO if you just didn't know and they all lined up and told you about the business because they all care about it the same level. They all talk about it like they're the CEO like it's their baby. Like Oh, amazing. That is amazing. Don't we all want that? Definitely. Yeah. And I think to like you mentioned with the intuitive aspect of where we're stepping into with businesses is that it is definitely that transparency is so clear now are getting clearer and clearer on Facebook on social media. Like you know, you know, immediately is that is that someone I need to work with not work with interact with. It's just it's very apparent. Are you finding that also in the clients and the people you're working with? You know what, it's actually really funny you say that because No, I have not. I have actually just last week wrote a post about this and have gone through this whole this whole awakening of recognizing how much I was allowing myself to get caught up in the smoke and mirrors because they're designed to really beguile you. They are you know, I'm in fact, I'm working with a mentor right now, who is constantly reminding me, Melissa, these tactics from these previous especially in the online, business world, these tactics are actually abusive, and it's like you have to treat yourself like a battered wife. Once you wake up and see, oh, I've been in an abusive relationship. Your tendency is to want to beat yourself up for not recognizing it sooner or not getting out sooner. And that's been the case for me. My mentors constantly reminding me Melisa like these things have been designed to trick you and to manipulate you and to gaslight you so that you pull yourself away from your intuition. If anything, some of this conversation almost makes it harder in my opinion, to know the difference unless you are always like really fine tuning your intuition. Because the people are saying authenticity, they're saying connection. They're saying spirituality, but you have to pay attention to how you feel when you're with them. They can be saying all the right things and yet still, and I don't fault the people who are doing that for it and probably because I have compassion like I've been there too. But it's like, you've been trained to market a certain way. You've been trained to sell a certain way you've been trained to, you know, organize your offers and your and your business a certain way and it really requires business owners to wake up and go, what is actually in alignment about the way that I'm running my business and what is not in alignment with my soul with my being. And I think again, it behooves us to really do that work. If we don't do it. Now we're gonna get left in the dust. Yeah, it's a critical timeframe right now. That's 100%. I agree with you. And it just seems for myself. I've also been around a few people on social media that I did. I was just naive and I wasn't following my intuition. But then I think back about a situation back in 2020 when things were happening, and something came up and I was like, I just knew that is not for me. And I didn't go there. And I'm so grateful I did it and so but other people did and and masses did and it's okay because that's where they're at, because that's one thing I want to mention too is that you know what people are at where they're at. I mean, so the person who's you know, coming at us trying to gaslight us or trying to, you know, ghost us or whatever, by what they're offering and doing. It's where they're at. And now when I see people like that I really recognize I know how to work with that energy because I recognize it now. So I'm getting quicker with my intuition and my understanding of how, you know when when something doesn't feel right. There's a reason why it doesn't feel right. Do you agree with me, Melisa? Yeah, 1,000% Yeah, and following that matters so much. I definitely have had ebbs and flows of that in my own business. running my own business of really following that intuition. And, you know, just yesterday, I had a situation where, like, I would, I would assume at the end of my day, if I felt off inside I would assume all the voices in my head were true. Like it's because you're not enough or you're not doing enough or you know, whatever. Your bottom line isn't growing enough for all those kind of, you know, older stories. And I sat with myself for a minute and I realized, no, it wasn't that at all. What happened was, I had a babysitter lined up for my five year old and the babysitter didn't work out. So my daughter was just watching screens all day yesterday. And that's not to say that that's super wrong or whatever. I just knew it wasn't what I wanted, but I told myself, you can't cancel your day. Just move ahead. But my heart was saying, no, like, Don't and at the end of my day, I felt horrible, and I could have made it mean all these things about me and said, I just realized, Oh, I stopped listening. I stopped listening right at the beginning of the day. And you know, now I can go back and learn from that and do do better next time. And not be so hard on yourself. Right? Totally. Because I think that's the thing is we just beat ourselves up with that. I mean, looking back at that yesterday, that's not really a big deal. I mean, in the scheme of things of life and all that goes on, it's like, oh, that's just not that's not a big deal and your daughter's not going to be scarred for life for it. It's gonna be okay. But I totally get what you're saying. Well, it's especially with our children. It's, you know, yeah, it's there's certain aspects of how we want things to look or how we want things to you know, to fall fall into place, and oftentimes they don't, we have to really move with whatever's we're given and be okay with that. So I totally feel you about that. When I think that for me, really listening to my intuition is connected to listening to my desires. And so that's where that's where it showed up for me it wasn't really about like my daughter had the best day she like loved watching TV all day, but it was for me, it was my heart. It was just simply being out of alignment with my heart. That was all it was. And another day, that may not have even been the case. But on this day, that was the case and my heart did speak and I didn't listen. And so it's just simply like, down to those kind of minute and that's why I do the work I do. That's why people really need support with intimacy is, you know, we everything around us. If we're looking at the scales, the scales are tipped way out of balance. Everything is pulling us out of ourselves constantly. And you know, the scales are way out of balance. So we need support on the other side of the scale saying the wisdom is inside of you. What do your feelings feel like about that? What does your heart say about that? What do you deeply value in this situation that's missing for you? Have you consulted your guides? Right, like all of that, we just need that kind of support even I need that kind of support. And I am that kind of support? Yes. We all need it right? Yeah, definitely. Well, most let's talk a little bit about what you do offer clientele so we can, you know, share a little bit about that. I'd love to hear it and let my listeners know. Yeah, so I just work in a one on one capacity in high ticket very devoted containers, supporting the individuals that I work with to access deeper intimacy in all aspects of their life and really at the end of the container feel like intimacy is one of their superpowers, and they have a better understanding of their masculine and feminine energies within themselves. So so that they can expand in their business and expand in their family life and feel very fulfilled and whole in their life. Beautiful. And I will have all that information in the show notes so you can get a hold of Melisa and find out how you can tap into your intimacy and have some support there and backing from her. Melisa, thank you so much. It's been so wonderful. having you on today. Thank you so much.