The Way Back Method: Restoring What Was Always Yours

🎙️ The Way Back Method: Restoring What Was Always Yours

Sometimes the greatest healing doesn't come from becoming someone new.

It comes from remembering who you were before fear, disappointment, and life's wounds convinced you otherwise.

In this follow-up episode, Tombo Baldwin takes a deeper look into The Way Back Method—a practical way of uncovering the false beliefs we've carried for years and replacing them with the truth that was there all along.

Through personal stories of fear, childhood memories, and moments of profound clarity, Tombo explains how experiences can shape our identity in ways we never intended—and how those same moments can become the doorway to restoration.

This isn't about blaming parents, circumstances, or the past.

It's about recognizing the wound, forgiving yourself for surviving, and reclaiming the courage, value, love, and purpose that were never truly lost.

You don't have to stay defined by your past.

You can go back... not to relive it, but to restore what always belonged to you.

As always...

YUP. I GOT YOU.

Transcript

0:38

Ah, welcome all you yuppers. Hey, it's such a good day. Boy, my lawn was drying up and guess what I needed? I needed rain. Guess what it's doing today? It's raining and now it's sunny. The best reality now is happening. Now, grab hold of it. And hey, I realized the last couple episodes, I totally got so excited that I forgot the intro music, which I love. So here we go. Just love that loop and a special treat for you today. I just started a YouTube channel and I'm going to be recording the video, the podcast on video. So if you desire, which you should, because I'm going to hand some older guy to watch the videos and see me. Or if you're just like, want to put a face to that voice. Well, here you go. You can find me as the yup. I got you and I will put it in my link tree. And so you can catch it there. Hey, I want to show you something really cool. I got bumper stickers and I've been telling you that if you write me a review and let me know, I will send you one of these bumper stickers. No charge. I will pay the postage and I will get it to you unless you're maybe across the big sea or way across the world. And even then I may try just because you wrote me a review, but here you are. Let's take a look. Get the camera back. This sticker could go on your car, could go on your water bottle, could go on your laptop, could go whatever, but you're writing me a review. I know it's, it makes more of a difference than giving money or anything else. Just the way all the little crawlers on the web go. They love those reviews. But today my wife listened to the way back episode, which I thought was a really great episode. And she also agreed, but she's like, Tom, you just, there were parts of it you weren't real clear and were pretty important. So we're going to try a second take. Hey, and there is nothing wrong with doing things twice. And it just means you get more practice, right? And I'm getting more practice. I'm getting better and I'm getting clearer. I am bringing you guys the mechanics, the secrets of reality here as they're revealed to me every day. And it's so funny. I'm recording myself here. I'm looking at my phone and I'm trying my phone because I really was looking at getting a good camera for recording because I have this little DJI camera, but it is so freaking small. My hands are so freaking big and my eyes are getting older and I can't see the screen. It's a great camera. And if you're young, young eyes and small hands, it's a great camera for you, but it doesn't work for me. So I was looking for something bigger. And the one recommend is like a thousand dollars. So I'm like going to try my phone. I'm going to try to upload it on smash and then transfer it. So here we go. We're doing that, but let's get in to the way back method. One of the things that came out of the prison state podcast, which powerful, powerful podcast. If you haven't listened, I'd recommend going and listening to it. And I'm actually going to listen to it again because it was powerful revelation as it was coming out in my world. But one of the things that I realized is that, and I've realized this before and we've talked about it before, but there are things in our past that just hold us up and they create responses that we really don't want. We were triggered and it is our response, but we really don't want those responses. And as we practice metacognition, looking at ourselves from the outside, we're just like, why are you doing that? And the way back method is one of those ways to retake that and to get back what was yours. One of the things that Adrian mentioned as I was doing that podcast was I wasn't really clear what you were getting back. And as I'm redoing this podcast and I'll probably leave the way back method up. And this is just kind of a follow-up to the way back method, just to make things more clear. But in my past, well, and I don't even like going here again, but most of my life, and you wouldn't imagine this by, if you've known me and lived around me, or if you've even listened to the podcast for a while, that I'm a fearful guy. Fear is probably the biggest issue that I've dealt with in my life. Fear about everything under the sun, fear about having enough money, fearing when I have money, fearing about what people are going to say, fearing when I write an email, how's the response, fearing about conversation, fearing potential conflict, dealing with a conflict and avoidance, and every dysfunctional trait that you can develop around fear. I have developed avoidance, manipulation, distraction, whatever it is, I have developed that. And for the last, since I've been married to Adrian, because dysfunction with two people that are in covenant relationship, as you might imagine, just doesn't work well. And so we came together and we're like, whoa, and my issues became really apparent. And like most people, I blame her. It's like, it's not my issue, it's your issue. Thank God I have a soft heart and started to do some introspection and realize this is my issue. And so this has been a 30 year journey. But recently, after Adrian's cancer diagnosis and journey, her and I went on a turbo growth spurt. Like if you look at trials, and cancer is a trial, and it's a scary thing. And I'm not saying it's good if you have it, it's dang scary. But when those things come into our life, there are potentials for incredible growth. Like growth, if you let it take, and I'm not saying embrace it, but embrace the journey of it, you can grow so much. And so after that and the months and approaching a year past that have grown so much. And so one of those things is addressing fear. And when I did the original Wayback episode, the Wayback Method episode, I talked about where my fear came from, where a lot of it came from. I did my own fair share of gathering my own fear and building on to the foundation of fear that was already there. But it's like, growing up, my mom and she had her own issues. And I'm not blaming her because most of our woundedness and the things we deal with often come from our parents or grandparents or people related, which they also in their surviving, which same as me, they developed these methods, and they helped them survive. And so we're not casting blame on anyone or shame because we all have stuff. But growing up, my mom was very fearful. I talked about how when I would be laying in bed, my mom would come in, look under my bed, look in the closet. I would hear her walk around the house, open all the closet door, turn all the lights, rattle all the knobs on the door. Sometimes two or three times, if she heard, we lived in a big city, the big city of Lincoln, Nebraska, which is fairly big, not in New York, but a big city. And there was a prison. Occasionally, people would escape. And if it was on the news that someone escaped, my mom is like, she probably rattled that front door like 10 times. And so as a kid, I was like, okay, there could be things under the bed. Okay, there could be someone trying to break into the house. And to add to that, when we would grocery shop, and this is in the 70s. Yes, I'm a kid of the 70s and the 80s, born in 67. So you do the math. In 1980, I was 13. So you know, a lot of the years were growing up in the 70s. And people were tampering with like over-the-counter meds by putting cyanide or strychnine or poison in there, and even tampering with food. So my mom, anytime we went grocery shopping, we had to take two off the shelf, take the third one back, because somebody didn't tamper with the third one back. If I was a criminal mastermind set on killing innocent people, which I am not, and hopefully you're not either, I would definitely put in the third one back, because that's just the way my mind works. And it's probably because the way I was raised. And if my mom had to open everything, check the seal, check the safety seal. Like when we went trick-or-treating, my mom inspected all the candy. She hated that we trick-or-treated, but you know, try to stop a kid from trick-or-treating. It's like free candy. You go to the door and you say a couple magic words, and they're like, hey, here's some candy. You're just like, best day of the year. Oh my gosh. And so my brother and I would trick-or-treat. Of course, we would get as much candy as we possibly could. And so we had to wait for my mom to go through, check it all. And then of course, me and my brother traded back and forth. So ingrained in my life is this fear response really to every aspect of life. And so in this way back method, I, well, let me give you some other scenarios. Let's not do just on fear. And I'll talk about fear and how I've overcome fear. And I think I'm a fairly normal person in regards to fear. Now I have a healthy fear, a fear that if a tree is falling, I'm going to step out of the way, not be like, oh, there's a tree falling. I'll be fine. Okay. There's a healthy response when things are coming that causes you, but you can't live under fear. And so another thing that I have dealt with is feeling loved, especially by women. Difficult thing for me. I always feel like I have to perform and no, not in the craft sense, in the bedroom, because in the bedroom, that's between your, you and your covenant partner and you should have fun and you should have a lot of fun and a lot, a lot of fun and a lot of fun. And you should experiment and you should do things that you're both comfortable with. Not fear of that, but that deep aching and need to please and feel like I don't live up. And that all stems from as, as I sat and, you know, I've talked about this in the quiet place, in the quiet place, if you can clear your mind and if you can just listen and you can listen with an intent. And my intent was to go back and find the root and in this way back method, I'll explain to you in a minute what it exactly is, but you go back. And so as I'm sitting there and I'm like, what is the root? And if this isn't happening for you, keep trying because it will happen. Image, memory, words, clues that can get you there. Maybe you don't get there right away, but there's a word and you can say, what's, what, what's more about that? You're asking in the quantum film, the kingdom of heaven, which I believe Yeshua Hamashiach is behind that, behind this field of information that we have divine antennas to receive this information. It was designed for us for this exact purpose to help us be whole and powerful to make a difference in our world, to love people and to be whole and to be able to enjoy life. And so as I'm asking, this memory pops into my head about a birthday present that I had got for my mom. And, you know, me and my brother were young and as young kids, you know, your dad has the money and you get to go shopping. We're going to go shopping for mom. Super excited because growing up, and I still do, I love my mom dearly. And I recognize her for who she is. And she gave me some wonderful traits or some other stuff that we're going to leave behind. And we're talking about that, but no shame on her. She's an amazing, amazing woman. Strength beyond belief. It's where I get my strength and my determination from mom is incredible. And I hope she would listen to my podcast. It's totally not her jam. I feel like a lot of times we're not on the same page, but that's okay. So this memory of shopping for my mom and we were at a department store, like a Macy's or I don't know what it was in the seventies we were at, but we're at the jewelry counter. Maybe it was Richmond Gordman's or something like that in Lincoln. It was a store that we went to a lot that basically sold everything. And I saw this gold little butterfly necklace, gold chain, little gold butterfly with some bedazzling, I guess that's what I would say, some bedazzling on it. And dad's like, yeah, we can get that. And I don't know, it was somewhere 12 and $20, which today is probably, I don't know, you know, substantial, not cheap. It's not cheap cosmetic, but maybe in the$30 range. And some of you are like, Tom, your mouth, I'm just guessing off the top of my head. I was so excited to give it to mom. I wrapped it myself and couldn't wait for mom's birthday. I don't remember what Mike got her, but I don't even know if it's similar because him and I are not similar in our tastes and I'm sure he has great taste. He might've got her a skull necklace. Sorry, brother, I had to say it. You and your skulls, you love your skulls and I love you. And because of that, I love your skulls also. And you're amazing. Comes to the day and we're celebrating mom's birthday. Usually I go out to eat and come home and give mom her present and she opens it up and I just saw the disappointment on her face. She smiled as moms do, but I saw the disappointment in her face and my heart, something inside me as I'm looking at it and reflecting on it said, I don't know how to pick good gifts. I just can't get it right. Which led to all kinds of other things later, right? Because we know words mean things, even when you speak them to yourself. And as a kid, I didn't know better. And most of my adult life, I didn't know better. So some of these things, I wish I could've got it right. Why doesn't mom like it? I can tell and she's faking it in that moment. And this is why the divine comes in. And this is the point that I think I didn't get quite right in the first podcast in clarifying this, but Yeshua Hamashiach, you might know him as Jesus, the historical figure, but I believe that is who spoke to me, said, and Tom, your heart is good. That gift you picked was amazing. You're not responsible for your mom's reaction. That is a beautiful, that is out of a heart of love and affection and caring. You did it because you loved your mom. And that's what I got back. The way back method, when we have things, excuse me, I got a nicotine in there that was got caught in the wrong place. A knickknack. If you're not doing nicotine, you should start a little bit every day. It's great for your health. And I know it can make a lot of you nauseous and so the patches are a little better for that, but so good. But in that moment, I got back part of me that I questioned from that time on. And there were other instances and other things that built on it because we live in a world that sometimes is a little rough and a little harsh and a little on the side of putting down more than it is lifting up. I'm here to lift up. And so in that way back method, I rewrote Yeshua Hamashiach helped me rewrite something that was stolen from me. I took back that good heart that I do things. I give good gifts. I'm not responsible for how people react. And nowadays I would say, mom, you know, it kind of seems like this isn't your favorite. Can we go pick something else out? Not blaming her, her reaction and how I took it. Okay. Nobody's really at fault, but a wound happened and you can't ignore a wound, a wounds there. And we always want somebody to blame, but the real issue is not blaming. The real issue is dealing with the wound. And so in that moment, I rewrote that. And that is now my new memory. And it is now a part of me. I have in there, Tom, you have a good heart. You pick good, thoughtful gifts. Maybe you don't always get it right, but you're going to make it right. That is now mine. It came back. I let it go just because I didn't know, right? You don't know. Don't blame yourself. I forgive myself for not knowing. I didn't know I'm a survivor and I survived and surviving is a great thing. If you made it to this point and you survived and you have a lot of dysfunction, who gives a shit you survived and you can deal with that other stuff. Now through one of these methods, the way back method is a great method for dealing with that. Another childhood memory. And this was a great evening. I love these evenings when my divine field is interacting with the quantum, the kingdom of heaven realm. And there are answers coming because when the answer is coming, healing and wholeness is there. And so when you quiet yourself and you interact with that quantum field, amazing things happen. And some of you are like, wow, this is woo woo. This is the first time I've heard this. Well, go back and listen to some other podcasts. This is real. If you don't believe it's real, ask, be quiet and ask, is it real? You'll get the answer. It's real. Tom, you're so confident about that because I've experienced it. I've lived it. And I know others have lived it maybe in a different expression, but they've also lived it. So another memory, me and my brother were playing in our room, his room, actually Mike's room, the room where my brother thought it was a good idea to stick a fork in an outlet. And I don't think you should do that. And he did it anyway. And thank God nothing happened. He couldn't get it far enough in. But wow, right? And Mike, I hope you don't remember that. I shouldn't tell you that I let you do it just kind of says, yeah, it must've been a bad day between brothers. I don't know. But we're in his room and mom and dad had some stuff stored in the closet and we were going through it like pictures and we were looking at old pictures. And in there is a newspaper and I'm of the age, I must've been eight ish or something like that. Reading pretty good, proficient. And there's a newspaper in there that says the amazing arrival of Tom, Tom Baldwin to the world, the city celebrates the mayor, the governor, all celebrating the arrival of Tom Baldwin, this amazing young boy. And I was, I was like, wow, I am something. Look at this. They put a newspaper out talking about me. I, I am the shit, right? I was like, yeah, I'm the good, good stuff. And I remember keeping that out, waiting until mom got home because we were sort of latchkey kids. Cause dad worked and then mom started working when we were older. And so we get home from school and not always a parent home or, you know, I, a lot of you live that life. And so we don't need to say any more about that, but got home and showed mom. And I'm like, mom, I had no idea. I was so special. And she's like, oh honey, that was just a promotion that came with some baby picture package we got. And you know, it's, it's, it's really nothing. And in that instant, guess what happened? I'm average. I'm not special. Again, as I'm going back in this way back method in the quietness and I'm being guided in this, right? These memories are pivotable. They are milestones and they are places of profound change. So when you go there, you have to take that. This is super serious. These moments are serious. These moments will change your life and your course forever. They are super important moments. And so interacting with this divine filled Yeshua says, Tom, you are so special. Yeah, that was just the paper that you are so special. And as a parent, you're like, well, how would you respond to as your mom? I would say, Tom, that paper is just representative of how we feel about you. Someone did that for us because we were so excited about you coming to the world. We knew you were going to change this world. This paper just as a representative of how amazing you are. And yes, some of it is made up, but the truth and the substances of this is you're special. That is what was restored to me. I am special. I am important. And as I say that about myself, I say that about you. So hear my words. You are special. You are that important. Your voice matters. Your abilities matter. Your impact matters on this world. Go back. Take that time. The way back method is the way to rewrite things that went wonky and we don't have to blame anybody. We're not blaming anybody. Stuff happens. We live in a world where there's this function and there's just a lot to deal with and surviving. We do all kinds of things to survive and way to go for being a survivor. But another chink, a milestone that I got back. I am special. I am amazing. My voice, my person, my impact matters so much. Get it? It's good, isn't it? So let's talk about fear because fear is the big one for me. And there may be a lot of you that deal with something similar or have a similar background or not a similar background, but a lot of fear, a lot of unstable circumstances like my parents divorcing added to that because every kid of a divorce, I don't care who you are and if you're divorced, you need to know that your kids are dealing with it. Even if they're 50, unless they've had a moment where they dealt with it, they feel responsible. And I'm like, what did I do wrong? Why did my parents divorce? Now don't get me wrong. My parents fought a lot before they divorced and there was some relief when they finally separated. But you still feel that. Did I cause this? Did I add stress as you get older? Was I a financial burden that caused this? It's hard. And you put that kind of guilt and shame and you carry that. And when you live in a state of fear, your cortisol is always high. I think this plays a large part and I'm not blaming anything, but the weight. I'm living in a place of fear and anxiety, heightened cortisol levels, stress, always about everything, and so seeking comfort. And for me, that was food. For other people, it's different things. It could be sex, drugs, rock and roll, pot, speed, whatever it is. There are things that satisfy temporarily and help us continue, help us survive. We talk a lot about surviving and you're here, you're a survivor. We can deal with the rest of that. But that just added to the fear. And when I entered, well, I shouldn't say I entered, I've always been in school. I've never been homeschooled. But as I entered puberty, my voice got stuck in the middle. Hi, it was very high. When Adrian and I were married at first, I would answer the phone when you had an old landline and they would say, Mrs. Baldwin. I'm like, no, this is Mr. Baldwin. They'd be like, what? The ridicule, the fear of going to school, the fear of opening this mouth. Okay, I'm doing these podcasts and I know watching the downloads and the stats that you're listing and I'm having an impact. But at one point in my life, because of fear, I didn't open this. I drove my life, controlled my life, a voice, wisdom that was not getting out to help my heart. My heart is to help. It's to help heal, to help restore, to bring things back the way they were. And through fear, it got silenced. Don't. The way back method, I went back. And in this moment, it happened differently and which is so cool because even though there's a method, there's not a precise way of doing this. The way back method in this point, Yeshua interacting with the divine field, that kingdom of heaven field, the quantum realm, reminded me of instances in my life that prove that I am not a person of fear. When given no chance to think, I am fearless. I react and I show no fear. Let me give you a couple circumstances. And ironically, they all have to do with fire. Well, not all fire, but quite a few of them. We lived in a mobile home, Adrian and I, and we had a couple of kids. I think Beth and Daniel and maybe Porter was really young. And in this trailer, we were preparing for gathering at our church. We called the Taste of Christmas where we had great jazz music put on by musicians in the church. And then I was in charge of cooking like pastries and desserts and stuff like that. And so we just put on this really nice evening because, yes, I in the past was a baker and have some culinary and baking skills and able to create some really cool stuff, was baking cheesecakes in the oven, little mini cheesecakes for people to enjoy at this. And as I was cooking them, I noticed the oven wasn't level and I'm like, gosh, darn it. And so I pulled the oven out to try to level it for the next batch. And as I pull it out, I hear this break and all of a sudden this flame starts shooting out of the back of the oven. And like we're talking three foot flame hitting the cabinets. And all of a sudden Adrian was like, everybody out. And so everybody ran out of the trailer and went to the neighbor's house. And I ran out and then I ran back in. Adrian's like, what are you doing? I'm like, I got to save the house. I got to save the trailer. Went back in, went to my toolbox, grabbed the crescent wrench, went outside and shut off the gas line, save the house. Didn't have a chance to think about the past woundedness, the past fear, the past stuff. I reacted and absolute courage and unabandonment, not worried about myself, but I got to save. I save. Now, if you're wondering about the gas line, I'm just going to tell you somebody in their grand wisdom hard piped it in the back of the trailer. It's supposed to be a flexible line and it had corroded because it was an older trailer and blah, blah, blah. So next instance, this house that we're living in, beautiful house and a beautiful suburban neighborhood, the blessings of a best reality. Now, as I was learning, even way back when we got into this house in 2005 to move out of the negative and into the positive and imagine and envision new realities and didn't even know I was learning it back then, but I was learning it because I look back, I can tell, well, 2015, we had a fire in here, supposedly a firework on the 5th of July, got into the garage and combusted some combustibles that I had like solvents, paint thinners, many things that people have in the garage. Maybe you don't mind are now in metal cabinets or stored outside, but caught on fire and the garage is ablaze. Like there are flames everywhere. This is a double car garage flames on the ceiling. We open the garage door and I have a hose and I'm in there amidst the flame. The foam from the garage door is dripping on my head, spraying this. And Adrian's like, get out. I'm like, God has saved the house. And what's really cool. And you may not think it's cool, but my older boy saw me and they're like, God, what can we do to help? And the ones that were old enough, I told him, go get another hose. And between myself, my boys and the neighbors, we saved this house. I watched another house burn to the ground, which is another story. Didn't think, acted, encouraged to save the house. Next story, another neighbor's house about a block and a half away started fire. His garage on the backside, he had been doing some staining, put some rags out there and he had like an instantaneous hot water heater. And he didn't realize how close the rags were caught fire and caught his garage on fire, spread to his house, watch the fire department chase the fire as his whole house burned down. But before this happened, I'm like, Jeff, do you need anything from in the house? He's like, I have lots of priceless artwork and running in this house filled with smoke, pulling things out of this house for this man, his possessions and his wife's possessions. As people are yelling, get out of the house, get up. Not a thought. I'm here to help. No fear. Now, some less, less scary, less life threatening things. But once I went to look at a job up Bridger Canyon here in the wintertime and I had a painting van back then and went up to his property and couldn't find it. And it was icy getting up there. And I had one of my fellow co-workers and we're coming down this road and we're literally sliding and there are like steep, steep drop offs. And I look over and I see Larry. Larry is a fellow that was working for me, just white face, white knuckle and panic. I'm like, Larry, you want to get out and walk? He's like, yeah, I'd feel better. Are you all right with that? I'm like, yeah, I drove that van down that hill because it's what I had. It's what I needed. No fear. Didn't think in the instance, just acted. And that moment, that way back moment to going back to those memories, Yeshua, through the divine field showed me you're not a fearful person. This is just an illusion that you've been convinced by your circumstances that you're fearful. I am not. It has transformed and is transforming my world. The way back method is the method that you go back and we're not blaming anybody, but you set things right that got wrong through whatever circumstances you set things right, that you, that happened to you that are wrong. You're not to blame. And part of this process in the way back method is you have to, have to, I'm going to say this again and again, because we are not very good at this. Forgive yourself. Tom, I forgive you for doing the best that you can. You did the best you can. Release guilt and shame around that. We've all done things and had things, but guilt and shame don't serve your future. Your future needs the way back method to set things right. Wow. I am already at like 37 minutes. So we're going to wrap this up, but I hope I brought some clarity to this way back method and you can understand how incredibly important this method is for your future. Please, please, for me and for all those people that need to hear, see, and experience who you are to begin to work with this method. And it's going to work a little differently for you. There's no set pattern. It doesn't happen necessarily a set way, but it is for you to get whole and healed. Hey, I love you guys. And you see my yup shirt. Ah, there's a back to it, but, uh, I'm pretty soon. I'm going to have these available and my bumper stickers and some other stuff. If you want them, you can go and purchase them. I think they're through a sticker meal, but just look for it on my link tree. I'll be adding it probably in the next couple of weeks. So, Hey, I love you guys. And as always, I got you. I do. I got you exit music as we love.