Vasilios Birlidis Presents: The Gayest Man in the United Kingdom, Dr. Sebastian Brackenridge, Discusses King George and Donald Trump

Dr. Sebastian Brackenridge, world famous Demigod and Supernatural historian, social media influencer, pet video posting aficionado, and  the gayest men in Great Britain a deep dirty dive into a comparison between Donald Trump and King George III. In this hilarious lecture/ podcast, Sebastian offers a fresh take on current resident of the White House and the former King of England. Outrageous, never serious and a huge ham, Dr. Brackenridge leaves his listeners shocked in this hysterical parody of a BBC radio program.

Transcript

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You are listening to DBN, Demigod Broadcasting Network. And this is exploring Olympus. 

Hello Chickens! Yes, it is I, your beloved, ADORING and dashingly handsome, Dr. Sebastian Brackenridge, coming to you from my country estate, located in the Highlands of Scotland. Before I begin my very special United States Election Lecture, I wanted to offer my sincerest thanks to you, my dear, dear listeners. I started this lecture podcast with a simple hope: 1. You would find me absolutely delicious to listen to, which, ta-da, I’ve obviously done. And 2. To give the world a few moments of escape from COVID-19 and also, from taking itself so seriously. Check and check. And you have responded by listening in from Ireland, Scotland and the United Kingdom, to Germany, Australia, Italy, France, Brazil, Bangladesh, The United States and of course, dear, dear Canada. Oh Canada…  So thank you and remember, dear ones, tell your friends and if you want to, feel free to send me a note and let me know what you think of my poor excuse of a lecture series. So let’s begin.

 Hello America, I’m coming to you from the nation that founded you so many years ago. I have to admit something to you, dear America: I have become a US Election Junkie. I know! Shocking!! I truthfully cannot get enough of it. So much so, my mother, Ophelia, the Dowager Duchess of Brackenridge has banished me from my own ancestral home, Brackenridge Hall, oh all the cheek!, at least until the election is over and it looks like with Mr. Trump, he plans to drag this  election out for an eternity. As if he really believes the American, formally British, people will suddenly say, “Alright, you, Donald, it appears you really really want this.  You’ve passed the test. (Trump, passing a test, a first for him.)

 Let me say this, chickens, I am torn. On one hand the idea of Mr. Trump’s defeat and temper tantrum has been a delicious diversion from the COVID-19 pandemic happening in our wonderful kingdom. On the other hand, I do adore President and Vice President Elect Joe Biden and Kamala Harris, and who can’t simply adore Dr. Jill Biden and Doug Emhoff. Now Doug, don’t get ahead of yourself, you may be the first second gentleman in US history, but I am the first male queen from across the pond.

Now, I know you won’t believe it, but my mother was very insistent and tried EVERYTHING to change my mind about doing this political podcast. She even pulled out a dusty argument that I haven’t heard in years. She had the audacity to state that I shouldn’t dabble in American politics considering I was in line for the Throne. I reminded her that, Heaven Forbid the thought and she should bite her tongue for even mentioning it considering the 1,000 + people ahead of me would need to expire, suddenly. It would make family reunions very awkward and very lonely indeed! So I turned to my delightful mother, and proclaimed, as a member of English Nobility, “, How Now Brown Cow! Our kingdom wouldn’t know what to do with itself if they had such a glorious monarch, who would always be dripping with diamonds and incorporating Jazz hands every chance I got. But I digress.

I will try and stay neutral on who I favored in the US election, although any clue you, my dear chickens, might gain from the mere fact that I am, after-all the Gayest Man in the United Kingdoms of Britain and The Kingdom of Northern Ireland, will not be derived from a single word from my supple and generous mouth.

Although, allow me to say, I haven’t forgiven Mr. Trump for his abhorrent behavior while he visited with our Beloved Queen, HRH, Elizabeth II. I mean really, You, Mr. Trump, had one job to do, adhere to royal protocol. Do not scratch your crotch in front of our Monarch! Do not chew with your mouth open! Realize that the sound of your voice isn’t as delightful as you yourself might think. Stop eating when the Queen stops eating.  DO NOT walk in front of our queen and for all that is holy and good, when participating in a receiving line, you bow (which you didn’t), say thank you for having us(which you didn’t) and then push off (which you didn’t). The very thought of our deliciously rebellious Princess Anne having to wait in line while you and Malaria act like a pair of Gormless Prats, is enough to make one vomit. I was right behind Princess Anne, the Princess Royale, and we had the most glorious time wondering if Mr. Trump’s girdle would survive the evening and if Malaria Trump ever blinked. And for the record, if you were told it didn’t and she doesn’t, you didn’t hear it from me! 

I bet you are wondering why I selected this topic, dear listeners, considering I normally deal with the supernatural, Gods and things that go bump in the night. But as I sat in my well-appointed chapel, contemplating the meaning of life and if I’ll ever fit into my skinny jeans again, damn to hell the shut-down weight gain, the idea for this topic hit me. (And before you even think about saying it, no, it wasn’t the very chapel crashing down around me because I actually dared to  enter a church) The topic was this: Who had it worse?  Were the struggles of accepting an excruciatingly embarrassing defeat that Mr. Trump was going through really all that different from the defeat King George III experienced with losing the American Colonies. When you think about it, technically they both lost the same nation. (although it should be noted that one lost a set of colonies with a population of 2.5 million and the other lost an entire nation, with a population of upwards of 325 Million. Ouch, chickens! Ouch!

So let’s take a deep dive into a comparison of Mr. Trump and King George III, and see what we can discover.

Now, I believe in order to understand these two men, it is necessary to dive deep into their upbringing. 

As most know, like Mr. Trump, HRH George III had a somewhat interesting life. King George was born in 1738, making him Mr. Trump’s junior, as Mr. Trump was clearly born in 1715, a conclusion drawn from Mr. Trump’s overt use of make-up and horse-hair to hide the fact that he is indeed a walking mass of rotting flesh.  Talk about Fear the Walking Dead. 

Both men were born into wealthy families, King George’s family markedly increasing their wealth over the centuries, and Mr. Trump’s family squandering their wealth many times over. So very, very similar. 

Please reference the New York Times Article that details Mr. Trump’s tax returns, along with the hundreds of articles detailing his many financial failures including Trump Steaks, Trump Airlines, Trump University(For which he paid a multi-million dollar settlement) Trump water (I nearly vomited at the concept of such a product), 3 failed casinos and of course, Trump Foundation, an entity that any normal person would consider to be a cookie jar broken open for the financial benefit of its namesake. I mean really, it’s one thing to skim off the top for organizational costs, but stealing money from cancer victims makes me wish tar and feathering were still a thing. Is it still a thing, America? Pity.

The then Prince George was born premature and not expected to live and was therefore baptized the very day he was born and rebaptized a month later when it became apparent the little prince would survive. Yay, George, YAY!

On the other hand, Mr. Trump was over-due to the tune of 3 months, feeding off his mother till the woman was a dry husk of a thing that could be blown away by the slamming of an evicted Trump tenant’s door. Think the crypt keeper, but skinnier and with the signature Trumpian hairstyle. Donald weighed in at a shocking 50 lbs, requiring the doctors to cut poor Mary Anne Trump in half to remove the tumor-esq baby from her body. An interesting fact unknown to many is that Donald was one of a set of triplets, two of which Donald ate in the womb! I know! Talk about Too much and never enough! Even in the womb he was a pig! Some say that when the moon is full, one can hear the moans of his deceased siblings, coming from the additional mouths found on Mr. Trump’s head, which is why he does his hair in that awful way. Children have been known to disappear without of trace when left alone with Mr. Trump, although witnesses have provided testimony of hearing a strange sound of chewing that can be heard coming from Trump’s comb-over.

Prince George grew into a healthy, reserved and shy child. Which is uncanny how similar the two men are because Trump grew into a sluggish, needy, insecure, loud, bully of a child who enjoyed torturing his siblings. (Am I talking about the child or adult? Your guess is as good as mine.) His mother was often  heard saying, “Just give him what he wants”, along with the standard phrase after each interaction with the young Donnie boy: “I need to lie down.” You need a lie down? The entire globe needs to be put into an induced coma to recover from BLOTUS. (see what I did there…. Bloat and POTUS equals BLOTUS. 

Both Prince George and his younger brother, Prince Edward, the Duke of York and Albany, were educated by private tutors. Family letters showcase that Prince George could read and write in both English and German by the age of 8.

Uncannily alike, the jury is still out as to whether or not the 74 year old Mr Trump can speak proper English or has the ability to read or write. Some believe his fondness for sharpies is due to his need to hide his abysmal spelling. It is also rumored that sharpies are the only pens his tiny hands can hold. Ever see him try to drink from a water bottle, chickens? It’s a scream. And don’t you dare lecture me on how rude it is to point this out. Ask yourself, why does he always play YMCA by the village people at his rallies? It’s a bloody gay anthem! And have you seen him dance? Pray to God that he doesn’t try to go on Strictly Come Dancing, the British version of Dancing with the stars once he is out of office. I still have nightmares of them stuffing Trump’s former press secretary, Sean Spicer, into those Tight Tango pants. But I digress.  

Prince George went on to achieve many monarch firsts including studying Science systematically, chemistry and physics, astronomy, mathematics, French, Latin, history, music, geography, commerce, agriculture, and constitutional law. Additionally, the young prince achieved great sporting and social accomplishments such as dancing, fencing, and riding.  

Lessor known accomplishments also included creating garden fairy villages and cross-stitching. The Brackenridge(s) personally own one of King George’s cross-stitched samplers. It currently hangs in the 1st floor lavatory, which is most proper considering it states: If you sprinkle when you tinkle, please be neat and wipe the seat. This was created during one of George’s manic phases and presented to our family by Queen Charlotte herself. King George’s religious education was Anglican and he was deeply devout, spending hours of each day in prayer. 

And as if Prince George and Mr. Trump were brothers from another mother, in his youth Mr. Trump was sent off to New York Military Academy because his childhood bullying and outright rudeness was too much for even Mr. Trump’s father, who was also known for his cruel nature. Like Prince George, Mr. Trump’s educational accomplishments were plentiful and included: Paying someone else to take his SATs, going to Fordham University, for only two years, and then transferring to the Wharton School. His educational career was deemed unremarkable, showcased little proof of Trump’s self-declaration of graduating top of his class. I believe it was the late William T. Kelley, who taught Trump at Wharton, who said, “Donald Trump was the dumbest goddamn student I ever had.” I almost wish Mr. Kelley were alive so I could ask him, “My dear Mr. Kelley! You’re holding back and being opaque. Tell us how you really feel.”

Granted, Mr. Kelley must have confused Trump with another student, as Mr. Trump has stated that he is “a very intelligent person” because he went to an Ivy League School, studied “Super Genius Stuff”, considered himself a very stable genius and of course my favorite, a direct quote from Mr. Trump speaking in third person, “Donald Trump has a very very large….. a brain. VERY VERY LARGE A BRAIN. Just let that sit there for a second, as it dies a miserable death. And as for the Ivy League nonsense, let me remind everyone that George W. Bush went to an Ivy League college, you remember the same dismally dumb American President that only the likes of Donald Trump can lift up public opinion and make Americans wish Mr. Bush was still in the White House. And of course it’s not like any of their lot went to Oxford. Although I should note, the delicious and incredibly intelligent Pete Buttigieg did. Hello, Mayor Pete, I adore you and Chasten!!! And as the Gayest Man across the pond, dear Mayor Pete, please grow your beard back and occasionally wear your Navy fatigues in public. Swoon, Chasten, (chasen) swoon! 

From a religious point of view, Mr. Trump was raised First Presbyterian and the family later moved on to the Marble Collegiate Church, part of the Reformed Church. Mr. Trump states that he is a member of that church while the church says he is not an active member. Mr. Trump later assigned a Ms. Paula White as his personal pastor, a somewhat controversial choice considering she is a proponent of prosperity theology, a “religion” that states material prosperity was a sign of God’s grace. Oh, what a load of codswallop that is. I asked my delightful mother, Ophelia, the Dowager Duchess of Brackenridge what she thought about Prosperity Theology. When I explained it to her, her reaction was to do something I’ve never seen her do. She laughed so hard, tea shot out of her nose.

She responded, “It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than a rich man to enter the kingdom of God.- Matthew 19.”

“Well,” I said. “Mr. Trump better construct a very large needle to fit his fat ass through it.”

She responded, “Indeed”.

Prince George Ascended to the throne when he turned 22. He married Princess Charlotte of Mecklenburg-Stelize  (Straylitz) a year later. They met on their wedding day for the first time. Their Majesties enjoyed an incredibly happy marriage, clearly demonstrated by their production of 15 children! Poor Queen Charlotte! Or perhaps, Lucky Queen Charlotte. 

For Mr. Trump, his life during and post college proved incredibly similar to King George III. While in college, Mr. Trump achieved an historic 4 military deferments and of course, finally managing to be deemed unfit for service due to his debilitating and terminal bone spurs. Makes the accomplishments of King George seem like a bit of a piffle.  

Mr. Trump went on to take up the family business of….Real Estate Development and slum lord, and found and married the one true love of his life, Czech model Ivana Zelníčková (zelnigKOVA), with whom he had three children or as the majority of Americans’ refer to them as spawns of satan. Both Ivana and Donald had an extremely happy marriage…until Mr. Trump found the True TRUE Love of his life, Ms. Marla Maples. He committed adultery with her, and dumped poor Ivana, and married Ms. Maples as she was carrying Mr. Trump’s newest spawn, Tiffany. Could any name scream white trash like Tiffany? It’s the #2 most popular stripper name of all time! 

Alas, this love was not meant to last and burnt out like a flaming paper bag filled with dog excrement. The couple divorced in 1999. In 1998, Mr. Trump met the really really really true true love of his life, Malaria Knauss. The two married in 2004, in 2005 they had a child, which also was the year Malaria became a US citizen via a Genius Visa. I mean Really…. If attracting/trapping old, fat, disgusting men and posing for soft porn pictures where you are fingering your suzy makes a person a model and a genius, the majority of hookers and the all actors in the porn industry would be considered geniuses. But I digress.

So, as you can see, both men were practically the same. One a king of a far-reaching empire, whose origins date back to 927 AD.  The other a king in a kingdom of slum properties, bankruptcies, scandals and reality shows, who reached incredible levels of success that has been documented in the encyclopedia of his own mind. (Probably the only encyclopedia Mr. Trump has ever owned.)

So, let us fast forward to the two men and the times they served their people. I’ve always been one to believe serving one’s people is the ultimate sacrifice one can give to one’s subjects.  (Oh, look mummy, I do sound royal!)

King George ascended to the throne with a warm welcome from all political parties, certainly the hoi polloi, and of course the nobility. Shall I be so bold as to say, He was the It girl of his time. Adored, beloved and certainly the talk of the town. Definitely top drawer, top shelf and of course as a dear friend from New York City would say, utter piss.  

Mr. Trump ascended to the throne… oops! I mean the US presidency  with the same je ne sais quois that endeared him to an American minority that I would refer to as America’s Chav(s) and slags, as he had lost the popular vote to the deliciously and overly qualified Hilary Clinton. Dearest Hilary, we of the kingdom across the pond cannot tell you how much we adore you, pantsuits and all! 

However, both men’s enjoyment of being Golden Boys, naturally Trump being Gold-plate or is it Golden Showers, would end abruptly  as relations would soon sour between King George and Parliament due to his extravagant nature of wracking up 3 million pounds in debts and favoring the Tories.  Not to be outdone, Mr. Trump, often referred to as a lazy sod, managed to institute a $1 Trillion tax cut for very wealthy Americans and managed to spend over $142 million of tax payers money to play 289 rounds of golf.

 May I offer something, dear listeners? 

As a member of nobility, I’ve had to deal with many gormless tossers, whom, unlike me, live off their family name and bleed the family finances to the point that they start sending the estate sterling off to dealers known for their discretion. However, to practically spend a year golfing during your presidential four- year term is both rude and beyond the pale. 

Interestingly enough, both men had a slight problem when it came to race relations. King George was not a supporter of ending slavery, very disappointed in you, Georgie, and by all accounts, Mr. Trump is considered to be a…. well, how does one put it tactfully, let’s just say it would come as no surprise if the few books Mr. Trump were to own, if he was able to read, would include Hitler’s Mein Kampf, Why White is Right: A picture book to help racist parents raise their white supremacist toddler, and Color me Racist- an adult coloring book that highlights famous racists throughout history.

So we now come to the heart of this lecture: Was the loss of the American Colonies and the loss of a presidential election the same? Did both men suffer equally. We would have to consider who took more of a piss on their subject’s breakfast porridge.  What were the sins committed by each man?

Historians, just like your delicious Dr. Sebastian Brackenridge, have studied what missteps King George may have taken. 

Yes, it was true that King George preferred one party, the Tories, over another. That left a very bitter taste in the mouths of the Whig Party, who despite their name weren’t known for amazing head dresses. This dislike of the Whigs may have contributed to the push towards American Independence. So basically, dear ones, the Whigs were undercover mean girls because you can be sure they were passing notes to colonists about how George had put on too much weight and how America deserved better than Georgie Porgy. The burn book they had must have been extensive.

Then there was the ill-advised Royal Proclamation of 1763. And no, it had nothing to do with outlawing Huge Grant movies or declaring the sitcom “are you being served” as a national treasure. I love Huge Grant and it goes without saying about Mr. Humphries and the gang. The King wanted to limit westward expansion of the American Colonies, and that didn’t sit well with some. Now, the topic of taxes has been blown way out of proportion, as most American History books prefer to paint our lovely King George with broad strokes. 

Regarding taxes, the American Colonists weren’t angry about the taxes themselves, as they were mostly exempt from the taxes paid by those subjects living in England. (Thank you very much) It had more to do with the whole taxation without representation. They feared Parliament would institute taxes on a whim, for instance taxes on bangers and mash, scones or even, dare I suggest, taxes on commemorative plates, posters with the “Keep calm and carry on” motto and God forbid, taxes on those lovely little Queen Elizabeth II Solar Queen statuettes! You know, the ones that you put in sunlight and the queen’s hand begins to wave. The horror of it all!  

Relations continued to deteriorate and before you could say Bed knobs and broomsticks, bippity boppity boo the infamous Boston Tea Party took place and well, dear chickens, everything went to hell. To dear George, the colonists were spoiled children that needed to be taught a lesson. Throughout the War of Independence, the King and his loyalists believed victory was in reach, but, sadly, losses began to stack up and support for the war against the colonists shriveled up to the size of a Gurken pickle. And don’t you lecture me on the whole it’s not the size of the boat, it’s the motion of the ocean. Anyone, and yes, I mean you, Allison, who spells her name with a Y and a silent q, knows anyone who says size doesn’t count, doesn’t know how to count!

And so George lost the colonies and there wasn’t a spoon full of sugar to make that medicine go down. This was a terrible blow to poor George. Depressed, directionless like a little girl lost in the woods. King George was so upset, he completely fell off his South Beach diet wagon and packed on an extra 2 stones. He was so upset he even drafted an abdication letter, which he decided not to send. He abhorred anyone who left a party way too early and his duty to his kingdom was something he could not abandon. The treaties of Paris were created and signed, and after coming into terms with the loss, I believe he went through the three Royal steps of grief:  Fury, Angry and mildly peeved, King George pressed forward to establish peaceful relations with the new Independent American States. The loss was great but eventually was met with a Royal welcome bundt cake along with a hallmark card with Britney Spears on it, proclaiming “Oops, I did it again” which opened to a sincere message of lets start over as friends. 

So, where do I start with Mr. Trump. Controversial would definitely be a beginning. Mr. Trump came into power vilifying anyone who dared to challenge him, playing on the deep seeded racial tensions and a complete dislike of any sort of vegetables. Mr. Trump’s hatred of vegetables was so all-encompassing that he ripped out Michelle Obama’s vegetable garden and demanded a McDonald’s burger tree be planted, along with bodyguards posted to protect it from the Hamburger-ler’s henchmen. 

Like King George, Trump faced many challenges from the kingdom he ruled over…sorry, I mean nation he served. I’m sure Mr. Trump would have preferred being a ruler, but it is impossible to fashion out of gold a crown and scepter that resembles an In-n-out Burger Combo #1 Double Double, along with a Sovereign's Orb that flips open to serve as a bowl for Onion Dip. I mean really, with his diet it’s no wonder he spends so much time on the… how do you Americans refer to it as…., ahh, yes, the shitter, tweeting. How charming.

Never before had a President won the Oval Office drenched in Scandal and with a country that was horribly divided. It goes without saying that Mr. Trump preferred one party (the republicans) over the other (the democrats), but the level of hatred between the two groups was absolutely delicious. Who needs to watch The Crown or East Enders for drama and intrigue when you’ve got the three branches of American Government, The Executive Branch, or what I like to refer to as “throwing a wobbly” central, The Senate, ruled over by the turtle, or as I like to refer to dear Mitch as that character in the movie Hannibal, Mason Verger, with the face all eaten away,  and of course the judicial branch, The Cast of Downton Abbey minus the brilliant Maggie Smith (aka the notorious RBG. If you’re listening God, now would be the time to repeat that Lazarus miracle…immediately.)  I was sure if anyone could bring the two parties together, it would be Donald trump….said nobody, EVER! I told you I was addicted to American Politics. 

Mr. Trump began his presidency already under investigation for ties between his campaign and the Russians. Rumor has it that Mr. Trump had been trying for years to establish a Trump Hotel in Moscow. Now, if anything should call into question how smart of a businessman Mr. Trump was, should have been that fact because nothing says delicious in the spring time than Russia.

Mr Trump didn’t waste time focusing on what America needed most and before you ask, no, it wasn’t a hug, nor was it candy, and it certainly wasn’t teaching the world to sing in perfect harmony and he certainly didn’t buy the world a coke… Yes, you guessed it, the United States needed Mr. Trump to erase President Obama legacy. It was a moving sale and everything must go. And just when the middle-class and the poor couldn’t take any more of all the winning that Mr. Trump’s tax cuts didn’t award them, First Lady Malaria Trump came out with her “Be Best” campaign. You know how first ladies always have found their causes that they focus on. Nancy Reagan had Just say no. Laura Bush was education and literacy, Michelle Obama advocated poverty awareness, education, nutrition, physical activity, and healthy eating via her Be Better program (chickens…. Isn’t strange how alike Be Better, which came first, and the Grammatically incorrect Be Best sounds… Plagiarism anyone?) 

To date Malaria’s be best program has accomplished nothing, but when you consider one of her program’s pillars was fighting against cyber bullying (Someone should show her her husband’s twitter account), nobody really expected it to do much of anything. These were the people who locked immigrant children in cages, after they separated them from their parents. I mean really, I’m all for locking someone in a cage who sexually gets a kick out of being the gimp, or jokingly locking someone up in Brackenridge Hall’s dungeon, but children? You would think a woman from the, and I’ll use Donald’s famous phrase, shit-hole country of Slovenia would have some sort of compassion, or at the very least a heart…. A soul… but consider this, this was the same woman who complained about how angry people were about the immigrant children and how she had to deal with (f-bomb) Christmas decorations at the white house. And not to be done by Marie Antoinette, Malaria gave those who were pro-immigrant the bird as went to visit those same caged children wearing a coat that had on its back “I really don’t care, Do you? Talk about letting them eat cake.

Trump continued his reign of terror by slashing environmental guidelines, doing everything in his power to tear apart Obama-care (which you didn’t, you naughty boy), throwing tantrums when mean old Nancy Pelosi didn’t bow down and kiss the ring (Even if she wanted to, how could she find the ring with all of Trump’s tiny hand cleavage,) ripping relations with America’s Allies to shreds (isolationism was the new black), practically swooning over dictators and other corrupt leaders including the likes of Vladimir Putin, (who wouldn’t swoon at Vlad riding a horse shirtless, bleh) and kim jong un (you know, the pudgy one with the bad Tupperware bowl haircut.) I mean really, somebody needs to take Kimmie aside and tell her, black isn’t always slimming, the whole blousy jacket is a crime against humanity, and carbs are not your friend. Eat a salad once and a while.

Throw in a Russian investigation, an impeachment that made the term quid pro quo the catch phrase that got tongues wagging and not in a good way, the constant flow of  thousands of lies the man would spout. Now chickens, I need to take a moment to say that I think the estimate of over 25 thousand lies during Mr’s trump’s time as president is underestimated. They are only including those lies that deal with policy, his record and what his administration was up to including hiding the miserable amount of people who attended his inauguration. Throw in the lies associated with the size of his hands, the size of his little john Thomas, his business successes and wealth, the size of his brain, his weight, his health, his intelligence and his art of the deal making abilities. Roll all of those and others into one number and you would begin to wonder if it would be easier to count the times he actually told the truth. My calculation come to 12 and that’s being generous. 

And finally, the COVID-19 pandemic, which makes my heart ache. Hundreds of thousands of people have died that didn’t have to if Mr. Trump had only… truly put America and its citizens first instead of his political aspirations. (America first…. That’s a catchy phase… some one should…. Oh, that’s right, never mind.)  

  And after a bitterly fought 2020 election campaign,  where Mr. Trump ignored CDC guidelines and put the lives of his supporters, his staff and the entire country at risk, and held political rallies that offered little social distancing or masks, Mr. Trump was delivered a swift kick into his dangly-bits as he was defeated by Joe Biden. I won’t even mention the homophobic and probably closeted VP, who calls his wife, “mother” ewww and reminds everyone of the creepy albino davinci code monk, nor the other cast of filth that made up his administration. And most of all, Mr. Trump’s complete lack of  a gracious bone in his body, as demonstrated by his Kassandra like behavior, proving what everyone knew about him that he is basically a walking/talking fassyclat. (don’t know what that is? Check out your local urban dictionary. Besides,  if he did have a gracious bone, you would have to cut through miles of fat to find it (I wonder if he bleeds bacon grease or Crisco shortening)

So the answer to my original question about whether Donald Trump’s loss of the 2020 Presidential Election was more painful than the loss felt by King George III when the Colonies became independent American states…. My answer will surprise you. I believe King George had it worse off. Forget about Mr. Trump’s delusions, his hunger for power and all of the other rubbish and filth that has made up his presidency or really what makes up him. Take away his need to be loved, admired, to be in the “in crowd” because that’s just childish twaddle. We must face facts: You can’t compare the hurt of an emotionally stunted  and potentially unstable mind. ( Side note: George wasn’t mad during this period, so don’t you dare bring up the whole blue pee thing)  

For all of King George’s faults and mistakes, including not wanting to abolish sIavery, I believe he truly loved the American Colonies and its people beyond what a shining jewel it was in the monarch’s crown. His papers demonstrated how hurt and betrayed he felt. You see, chickens, unlike Mr. Trump, the remorse he felt for what he considered a major failure and disappointment to his subjects, the honor and duty his birthright gave him to be his subjects and the kingdom’s protector, not to mention the stain he believed his mistake would leave on the monarchy,  was reason enough to potentially consider abdication. He was a man, who loved his God, loved his queen, loved his children and loved his country and subjects.  And just like any father, he made mistakes along the way, but it’s fair to say that he learned from them. I believe the deep hurt felt by King George can be summed up in this exchange between the King and America’s John Adams, who was appointed American Minister to London in 1785. King George said, “I was the last to consent to the separation; but the separation having been made and having become inevitable, I have always said, as I say now, that I would be the first to meet the friendship of the United States as an independent power.”

That’s humility. That’s regret. It’s not blaming others or deciding to ignore the facts directly in front of you. Like a parent, he realized that sometimes you have to let go and wanting to still have those who have moved on in your life, one must show an ounce of graciousness because in the end, you still want what’s best for them. 

Mr. Trump isn’t capable of this, to be able to acknowledge the disappointment, the hurt, or the mistakes and the people who were hurt them. That’s isn’t him.  But, I don’t believe the isolationism, the America First movement or the concept of Trumpism isn’t the America the world has come to count on. Poor King George and yes, Poor Mr. Trump.

That’s the long and the short of it, dear chickens. Think differently, drop me a message and offer up your opinion.

 My name is Dr. Sebastian Brackenridge. You can find me on the web at www.dr-sebastian-brackenridge.com, on the various podcast platforms and in social media outlets. Don’t be a stranger. Drop me a note and tell me how I’m doing and please, share with your friends, your family, your neighbors including the old man who has the sign that says , “Stay off my grass or as in England, “please do not allow your dog to foul our lovely garden. Thank you for listening.