Queer, Black and ADHD - Kristian Moton's Empowering Story

Marc Almodovar chats with Kristian Moton about his personal ADHD journey as an African-American queer man. Kristian shares his struggles in school before diagnosis, the power of finding mentors in the ADHD community, and the importance of embracing his whole identity in his nonprofit leadership role with the Men's ADHD Support Group.

They also discuss volunteer initiatives Kristian spearheads for the organization. He explains what draws him to service, how supporters can get involved, from managing social channels to launching local meetup groups, and why their community has a welcoming, chill vibe focused on making ADHD advocacy sustainable and fun.

If you'd like to join us as a volunteer or start a nonprofit chapter in your area, fill out this form! https://forms.gle/SxcJLrFWq9jR5Snx9


0:00 – Introducing Kristian Moton, Organization Director of the Men's ADHD Support Group

3:45 – Kristian opens up about his struggles with ADHD symptoms and discrimination as a student and adult

13:40 – How Kristian leads and engages volunteers to further the organization's mission

22:30 – Kristian on nurturing a welcoming community for our volunteers

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Transcript

 So we are live. Welcome to the Men's ADHD Support Podcast . I am very excited today.

Well, I'm always excited. But today we have our organization director Kristian Moton. We're going to be talking to him about his story and  Where he comes from, what's his ADHD background like, and then some amazing volunteer initiatives that we have going on with the non profit organization that is the Men's ADHD Support Group.

I am always thankful to talk with Kristian and work alongside him. For me, it's always special because  I remember in 2020 when the Men's ADHD Support Group really started taking off. I had partnered with John Hazelwood on actually making it something that's beyond the Facebook group, but more into a community.

And we started doing bi weekly Zoom meetings, and Kristian was one of the first attendees to some of those early meetings. And it's been amazing working with Kristian in the past few years. And I'm excited to give everyone the opportunity to learn more about who you are and what we got going on. So Kristian, tell me a little bit about yourself.

What's your, what's your ADHD story? 

First off, thank you for that. Like, awesome introduction.  I always forget like.  Like, we've been so much in the trenches, like, I forgot, like, oh, this only happened maybe, what, four years ago? So,  time is funny in that way. But it's been, like, really great being a part of the group and getting value from that, from the group and, like, helping in this organizational space.

But before all that I guess if I was to talk about my ADHD journey, it would, it would have to really start to begin with, like, Who I was outside of this sphere school. So for me, like I was very much like an old soul. So for me, I was like always talking to people like it didn't matter if they were like my age or significantly older.

I  found a way to connect with people. And I think it was because of my fixation on language and communication. So for me, like, learning new words was like really big so like I would say new word big word in front of like an older person and they like, how do you know that word like what you're talking about, and then it will always.

You know, I was always kind of like this kid who, you know, you could talk to. So old soul, old spirit. I think when I was in school, that was the first time I realized like, wait, people don't really operate like this. People don't operate in conversation.  Most of the, like most of schools like shut up and listen and shut up and read.

And I'm like, but wait, y'all never taught me. So it's like always, you know, it's been always really hard to kind of like deal with those kind of.  Unspoken rules, right? So  I think it wasn't really that big of a problem in elementary school, but towards middle and high school, that's when my ADHD really started impacting kind of like my academic success.

A lot of it was just how I understood. Relationships and that was like really big for me. So it was, it was always like, Oh, he's really, really smart. I could tell that he has a grasp and a command of the subject, but he doesn't, he doesn't apply himself. And I feel like for me, it was always like the, You have eight hours to teach me this thing.

After the eight hours, I'm, I'm done. I'm not bringing this stuff home. Y'all crazy.  And I, I, and, and I guess.  In academia, the systems that support it. I can't do that. The education, the learning, like the journey itself and the experience of learning totally get that, like, sit down and do this assignment because I said, so not a good enough reason.

You can't get my brain to do it. So that was that was kind of like high school, but I didn't really start taking my ADHD seriously until I was in college.  In my 4 year, I had graduated from my associates degree, right? And I had a lot of support in BCC. Like, we had there was this program called the ASAP program.

Like, they, it was like, they got your books. They got your laptops. They had counseling sessions with you. If they saw that your grades were slipping, they talked to your professors. Like, they was in it to win it. So, I think with all those accommodations and all those supports, I was able to kind of like, Push through because I, because of those relationships.

Right. But when I was in my 4 year, I didn't have those same support. So that was really hard. I wound up failing out of my 4 year. And that was like, that was Lehman College. And that was when I saw Jessica McCabe's TED talk. She wasn't even doing the web. She wasn't even doing YouTube yet. The TED talk of, failing at normal and then I was like, oh, wait this was like the first time I like ever felt seen like, oh, this is my experience. Like, oh, this is what it means to be like, really bright and have this aptitude. But like these simple things, because I feel like, you know, there was always this animosity between me and my community and me and my family where it's like.

I'm not doing this maliciously. I'm not bad at school maliciously. Like, like, just come to a parent. Just come to 1 parent teacher conference. Just talk to 1 teacher. Like, you'll see you here, but, you know, I have working class parents. So, like, they were, they were, you know, I mean, they weren't doing it and that that situation wasn't all the way healthy.

So, um,  I guess.  It was at that point. It was at that point I started learning a little bit more about ADHD. So I read Peter Shankman's book faster than normal. And that's kind of like, that's what helped me reframe my ADHD for from like this thing that makes me disruptive in school to this thing that like,  I can really  utilize for my own benefit.

I feel like there's a lot of things about like ADHD being a superpower. That's a little bit like, yeah. contentious, where it's like, it's not all great. I mean, there's things that debilitating about this, but I think if I, that was the first time I thought, wait, I can actually use this to my benefit.  Then  because of that, because of that understanding, because of that knowledge that I was able to get in that engaging way, like via video, via book on my own, I was able to  I was able to kind of, like, land enough discipline to get, like, a regular full time job being a teacher,  ironically.

And a lot of my work is kind of, like, really making, you know, education in this work approachable for kids like me. So  pandemic hits while I'm doing my doing my full time work and they're telling me I can work from home, which is phenomenal, except that's where my PlayStation is my computer is  and like, you know, well, I look left and I look right.

People weren't working. People weren't having jobs. So I'm like, I'm in the middle of this crisis. And I'm in the middle of this crisis and like, I need to keep my money. So what do I do? I  I've grown up in the church like really heavy. So I knew the power of community and the power of like leadership and contributing and stuff like that.

And I know that that could exist in virtual space. So in the virtual space, so  That's when I think I was hitting up people on Twitter. I was actually following Rene at the time because Rene had Rene was following a friend of mine. I mean, a friend of mine was following Rene because she had ADHD. She was a black woman with ADHD.

Her name's Janicia. Hi, Janicia.  If you hear this. And she put me on to Renee Brooks and then that's when she had tagged you with with the work that you and John were doing. At that point, I didn't even know y'all were only doing it for like a couple weeks.  But I was like, you know what? I gotta get up in here.

Like, I gotta, like, I knew that.  You don't learn in isolation. You really do need to learn and experience something in community. Like, I can learn something and I could do something, but if I'm not talking to other men or other people with ADHD about this experience, like, that was going to be hard. So at that point, it was like Zoom, and then maybe we had like a couple hundred people on the Facebook page, but it was very much kind of like,  Hey, you know, I have a problem with this or hey, I was doing this like for me, my biggest pieces, like something that was big for me.

One time I was experiencing, like I had my first panic attack and I was like, I didn't know what I was doing. It was crawled up. There was like, I'm in New York. I'm in the Bronx, New York. So there's bachata on the top. You know what I mean? There's merengue on the bottom, and there's trap on the  on the floor under me.

So I'm like,  yo,  and I'm like overwhelmed, I'm overstimulated, and that was the first time I ever felt like that. I was panicked. So  what do I do? Like, I'm curling up into a ball, I'm under some covers, and I'm like, at least it's gonna make me feel better. But I'm like, well, yo, what the fuck is going on? Like, what am I doing?

So I actually take my phone out. I'm like, hey, guys, I'm under my blanket. I'm not feeling really good. What the fuck is going on?  It was like, yo, that's a panic attack. I was like, Oh, and I was able to put the word to it. But if I wasn't in community, if I wasn't in that group, like, if I wasn't talking about my experience, like, I wouldn't have gotten that.

So, I'm very much a guy who's like, you know, I get I'm very much a guy like I'm not leaving a situation. Worse than how I found it. So I'm always kind of like working at something. It could be a job. It could be a relationship. It could be anything, but like, you want to know Kristian came over there and made the situation better.

So, 1 of the things that I felt like was really powerful with the group was like moments like that. So that's when we started having conversations about, hey, let's, you know, do you think about what do you think about making this a nonprofit? What do you think about it making that doing that and like coming up with evaluations to kind of like throw out and then at the end of the meetings and stuff like that.

And those were the small things that I would do. And I didn't know how that would help. You know, I mean, I just wanted to, I needed other people to get this resource because it helped me.  Right, so, you know, I understood like, hey, if you evaluate because I was, I was teaching at that time. So I knew, like, if we ask people, if we survey people, like, hey, how was your experience in the zoom meeting?

Hey, how was your experience in this Facebook interaction? Like, we could get more feedback and we can grow. So, you know, it was weird because in my mind was like, that was just an idea. But like, you see how that seed planted and now we're, you know, where we're at now. We're like,  Close to like 17k members, but for me, I never thought of it like that.

I was just like, Hey, let's just help. Right? So, um,  life, life started liking heavy. And I think maybe what 3 years later,  maybe 3 years later, it's like, Hey, hey, Kristian, we're starting this nonprofit joint. It was like, Hey, do you want to help? And I'm like, hell yeah. But like, also like, y'all remember me?  So it's so I feel like this journey in this organizational director space is always been like a blessing and also kind of been like, you know, something that is true to me, right?

Where it's  I want people to be real about their experience. I want people to be in community with each other. It can be virtual. Most of us be playing. I'd be playing games with Shane and Sam like every week. Like it doesn't have to look like, you know, you know, A guy sitting in a meeting really sad about themselves feeling guilty and then leaving back home at least heard, you know, I'm like, nah, it don't got to look like that.

It don't got to look like that. And so a lot of my work has been, you know, making sure that that that isn't the case. Like, how do we make sure that ADHD is just as normalized and just as cool as literally anything else.  

No, it's amazing. Yeah. And I mean, there's a, there's a few things that that stood out to me as you, as you were giving that, but like, 1 of the things is kind of like when somebody is in a college setting.

I mean, we have a lot of  students with ADHD within our community. And  I mean, when they're, they're making that decision to.  Advocate for themselves to get that support that they need and whatnot. I mean, what was that? I mean, what's that experience like for you? I mean, like, what, what, what can somebody do to actually learn to speak for themselves? 

So I feel like  this is how I feel like if I pay tuition. If I'm paying tuition, I'm gonna be up in somebody's face if I'm confused about something.  I ain't going to be, I ain't going to be paying nobody no money. Yeah,  confused. No. So I feel like there are resources, but not every college is created equal and everybody's schedule is a little bit different.

But I invite people like I had an academic advisor. And I also had a counselor on campus. So I invite people to kind of like whoever they can talk to as their first point of contact. I feel like hitting it at a lot of different angles. I feel like for those who are in our group, continue to activate that.

We have a discord, right? So we have a discord and we have tabs that like speak about writing, poetry, academic stuff like that. Like y'all can y'all can jump in those places and ask the Facebook quite like  Facebook, especially like somebody gonna answer your question. So I answer your question. Somebody gonna do that.

But I would say,  try to hit it from every angle. That would be my my advice because talk to people who are physically around you talk to people in the group that speak to your experience and utilize the resources. That are on campus because they should at least have something. And if they don't, that's a problem.

Yeah. Yeah. 

So yeah, no, that's, that's, that's important. And it reminds me of when we, we had done another podcast episode  with, with you in the past, I remember John was co hosting this episode too. And. One of the, the biggest things that stood out to me when talking with you is the importance of community and I mean, the, the reality is, is that when we're living life with ADHD, I mean, we typically live most of our lives being shamed, being called lazy, feeling misunderstood.

And so when we're around people that understand and get us and have ADHD too, and, or understand how to work with ADHD, then we're giving ourselves really the upper hand and, and, the truth is, is that we, it's up to us to find structures and systems that work for us and, and putting our strengths to work for us.

So that's, that's a whole spiel and a whole nother podcast. But but, but on the note of community you have and  segwaying into the workplace and everything like that. You, as your organization director here, I mean, your strengths have always stood out to me as somebody who is very passionate about people.



You know, like, I, I loved, like, the way you host meetings always gives me a sense of  prioritization on what's the energy like, how is  The culture within an organization, things like that. That's always stood out with me with for you. I'm extremely biased saying this right now because I am the president of a nonprofit who is looking for more volunteers in the organization as well as you.

But  I have always felt that volunteering and working in a setting, especially where you're doing purposeful work.  Is something that can be  quite fulfilling beneficial to your mental health, but as well, but you're also working with other people who are like minded who gets you and have a similar mission to you.

I find that to be extremely beneficial.  I was curious to see, like, I mean, before we get into the actual details of positions that we're looking for and everything like that, from an honest perspective from you, like,  why, why would somebody volunteer?  What is the purpose or reason behind doing something like that? 

I got to come from it with different angles. Right? So I think it's really important for people to understand or recognize that.  Like, so for me, my, my space in the volunteer space, I've always been kind of like, civically engaged and kind of like, had that that mindset. This is because I've seen poverty.

So I've seen, like, the ravages of poverty in communities. And I'm like, well, somebody got to help if I, even if I didn't feel like I had nothing, there's someone who has even less than me. So there's. At this point in my age, like I'm 32 right now and I feel like being in spaces, especially this space as a person who's black and queer is important because  when I was younger, I didn't have anybody like that.

So for me, my volunteering now looks significantly different that like when I was serving in soup kitchens and serving and like. walks and fundraisers and things like that. It now looks like managing a non,  like directing a nonprofits work and, you know, being here and doing podcasts like this and going out to different places.

But now it's a space of like, Hey, I'm, I'm being seen. So I feel like.  I feel like 1 thing about volunteering is you don't know who you're affecting and you don't know who needs to help. Right? So, even if you feel like you can't help anybody, you'd be very surprised being in a space like this who you can reach out to.

And I feel like that's always been fulfilling as an educator. You know, seeing those eureka moments with students that that's kind of like what I go for with volunteering when I know that I've helped somebody out, or I know somebody reaches out to me, like, we went to the conference and there are a lot of people who came up to me and they were like, really excited about me.

And I had no, I had no idea people even knew I existed, but just being in the space because my work preceded it, my, like, my work preceded my name, like, stuff like that. That's like,  That's like mind blowing for me. I feel like for the, but for the volunteers in our group and for the people who would like to volunteer for organization, the thing I feel like. 

is unique about this is that volunteering doesn't look so linear, right? So when I,  me, you and John connected literally over talking about Pharrell. And ever since that point, ever since that like connection about talking about Neptune's, N. E. R. D. like talking about like our favorite songs and shit, like, I'm like, nah, I don't give a fuck about these people.

I want their dreams. Like, I want to work with them. I want to be in the trenches. Like you can't. Like there's, there's something about community, but there's also about friendship. There's always something about like, you know, we're so isolated with these computers and so isolated with like communicating, but like  you and John get me, you John and you and John get me in that way.

And then in another way, another volunteering thing I'm doing right now is a Twitch streaming and I'm literally playing one of my favorite games. It's  Wednesday and I'm just chilling. I'm playing.  Borderlands. It's really Wonderlands, but it's, I'm calling it Borderlands because that's that's the franchise, and they can't stand me because I'm a speedrunner, but, like,  people view us, people give us love, and, like, that's, like, those, there's so many different wonderful ways to volunteer that can look, like, great.

I don't feel like,  I feel like it's more like a why not than a why. If that makes sense, because like, I inspire people, I have fun, I be chilling,  it's, it's work and, but it's work with people, like work with people that are like minded, work with people who are, who you're cool with, who you're friends with, it doesn't really feel like that, so that's how I, that's how I would approach that question.

Mm hmm.  What's your specific why? 

My specific why? Like I had said before, like, I'm not, it, I'm, I'm, I'm the type of guy who, I'm gonna, I'm If you saw my name on something, you're going to know that it's excellent. Right. So  I'm not, and I, I bring my whole self to every  black and queer, like so much of my life has been me piecemealing my identity.

Like I can be black here but I can't be queer here and I can't have ADHD I can have ADHD here and be queer but it's really hard for me to be black like this is one of the organizations I've. Bring my whole identity in and like really show up in a really powerful way. So for me, like, that's big and like, you're not going to be able to die that because look at the work that I do, you feel me?

You're not going to be able to say anything about, and this is not to say anyone has, but like, or anyone will,  but I'm very much a  get, get out what you put in type of guy. So my.  That's kind of, that's, I don't know.  

Yeah. Yeah. No, no, that's, that's great. And I mean, and then like a big thing that stands out too is like, and I think you had mentioned this in your bio or your storytelling and things like that, but it's also coming from a place of like for me, whatever, whenever I'm speaking, whenever I'm doing any type of coaching, like an instant motivator for me before recording anything or doing any type of work like that is I always think about.

When I was 16 years old and struggling with self confidence and had undiagnosed ADHD, what is the, what is the support system in which I would have benefited from, you know, and, and being the person that is at the forefront,  helping to lead a community and doing the work that I do and speaking to the people who were once in a place that I wasn't like that to me is just outrageously fulfilling, you know, and. 

I mean,  it's, it's been amazing to see the growth that we've had and a lot of your ideas that have come into place and how you've benefited this organization over the few years. And for me, I'm just very,  especially after the international ADHD conference, like, I'm at a place where I'm extremely excited like you mentioned people who inspired you. 

And the fact that those people are like.  Are are people who are in the, our colleagues, you know what I mean, that these are people that have helped put us on like Jessica just called us a ADHD Renee Brooks, you got to meet her in person and she gave you a big hug at the international conference, like that type of stuff for me is, is, is, is huge.

And it just. Really just makes me think,  like, what's next, you know what I mean? Like, what's, what are the next steps of growth for the organization? Like, who are the next  individuals with ADHD that we're, we're looking to work with? Things like that. So, 



As our organization director,  what do you feel is next?

Like, what are, what are some things that we would like to  work with other people on? Get some help with?  Things like that. What do you, where do you go 

there? You know, I think it's important to note that, like,  Our organization doesn't doesn't have a building right so the work, you know, we don't have like a storefront we're not like some type of like grassroots organization that's placed like in some place in downtown we're like really, you know, virtual.

So a lot of the work, like exists in that space. Right. So, where we might have needed people to like sign a petition like we don't need that but what we do need is like people.  Who can really help us with some of the tech arms of, you know, what we're doing. So right now we have initiatives doing Twitch and trying to put our Twitch channel into a space where we can reach people.

But we need a lot of infrastructure, people in infrastructure pieces. So like, audio editing, video editing, making these clips and putting them out. And I feel like.  For me, and just a, just a side note for Twitch, what's been really cool about that is that I've always wanted Twitch stream, but I've never like in my own been able to like, get all the pieces because I'm a working professional as well.

Right? So I have a job still but. What so I haven't really been able to lean into like that part, but through the work that we're doing, I can actually tap in and learn a lot more about which because I'm learning from Shane and I'm learning from Sam and I feel like where I probably would have spent.

Money or time or resources trying to do it on my own. I'm now working with other people to kind of like, make that break. Uh,  so, but, like, I wouldn't have been able to do that until another 3 years, but we just started streaming regularly in September. And I think it speaks to kind of like, if you go by yourself, you can go fast, but if you go together, you go far.

So. Twitch is something like audio and video editing for that. We're trying to grow our YouTube channel and come up with a strategy for that. We need video and audio people there.  We also,  it's not all tech though, because we're also trying to start up chapters all over the place, right?  Right now, we're working, right now, after this meeting. 

I'm gonna head downtown to to do our in person meeting there. Shane does an in person meeting in North Carolina. And at the end of these podcasts, I would love for us to be like, Hey, you know, this week, you know, these are the in person meetings coming out, you know, in these States these countries, I think  I think Dave is doing something in Ireland  soon.

So I feel like there's a lot of opportunity if you are interested. In bring yourself out into these spaces and video and audio editing, but you might not necessarily  know, like the 1st, couple of steps and it's an opportunity for you to learn very, very quickly how to do that. And we're all really understanding and really chill.

And  it's not 1 of those, like, audio editor or else or video editor or else is very much like a, hey, you know, do it at your own time. Do it at your own pace type thing. So. Yeah.  Yeah, no doubt. 

And I mean, we touched a little bit. Yeah. I mean, I know you want to touch about like the learning process for somebody who is  new to the organization.

Like somebody, somebody hears this and they want to join the men's ADHD support group and start maybe their in person their own in person chapter or work with us as a video editor, things like that. Like what's, what's joining and learning like for them.  

Well, I imagine people who are listening are already people who are trying to be engaged in like the learning.

Yeah. So I feel like for me, like, that you've already made the first step of like, hey, I want to, you know, invest or be in community. Or I want to at least learn about my more about my ADHD. So that's already happened. If people are not already part of the group, I invite them to join the group.  I think that'd be great.

That's a great 1st step because, you know, being a community is important  on our website actually for the, men's ADHD support group. We actually have a volunteer. We actually have a volunteer section that people if they want to, they can fill that out and then we'll contact them and, you know, talk to them about the next steps there.

But I would say that the learning journey. Started when you said, hey, I want to learn more about it. And I think the learning journey continues when you say, I want to make this real. Like, I want to actually provide something. I want to inspire somebody. I want to do some type of work because that's what really brings more people out.

I feel like. I think about Sam, right? So I think about Sam  where he's like,  you know, when we first started out, he was like moderating and things like that. But then he came to the conference with us. And that's also been a boost. And now we're talking about creating content together now. Yeah, we can't forget Sam.

We can't, I,  we cannot forget Sam. Some people can forget Sam. It's weird. 

I'm being ADHD as a podcast host right now. But like, I'm just thinking about like, like, you know, remember forgot about Dre.  Y'all 

nowadays, everybody wants to talk like they've got something to say when they move their lips, just a bunch of gibberish.

Exactly. We forgot about them. 

So,  yeah, we can't forget Sam. But I'm sorry. I cut you off from the point you were making. I just have an ADHD moment. 

I love that.  I love that we were able to do that.  Yeah, but the learn journey continues when you like when you're in the work I don't I know for me like as a as a piss poor student, this is what I'm like, I can talk, you can tell me about it you can tell me about a book but unless it's relevant to me in my life immediately I it.

I don't care. Most of the math, I forgot most of my math. A lot of my history I still remember because it's still relevant, but most of my math I don't forget about it. But I would say that I would say too,  to the point of,  like, I forgot my thought. Of course I forget my thought.  Fun to happen.  

You brought up Sam and, and his growth in your organization and the work that he does and everything like that.

Yeah, but 

you get to grow, you get to grow. To that point, you get to grow, you get to understand, and I think you get to grow with people in a, in a direction of where you want to go, which is like mastering your own self and mastering your own brain. If you don't, if you're not in the work, you, you lose a piece of that.

Yeah, yeah, 

no doubt. Yeah, 100%. Was there anything else that you wanted to touch on on volunteering that I didn't get into before I segue into where else my brain is going? 

Nah, nah, nah, but if it comes up, I'm gonna try to see if I can snake it in. Okay, 

now you, you've had a really awesome introduction within the ADHD community. I mean, we were like hanging with some friends like Dani Donovan and  Dr. Carrie Parcells, who did an amazing talk at the ADHD conference, like, some, some really, really awesome people, Brendan, who does amazing work and is part of our board.

Now,  what about you? Like, what's next For you within the ADHD community, like, what are you thinking long term here?  

He's got me on a podcast. 

All right. I'm really invested in continuing the volunteers to grow and the organization to grow. So a lot of my, like, thought mechanical work has been there, but I have terraformed the living room to be kind of like a space where I can continue to start to report content or according to kind of like some of the things that we've been talking about in the space.

A lot of the work that I want to do. is going to be around my identity as a black person with ADHD and a queer person who is black. So even though, even though those things kind of like seem kind of like very, very different, I really want to,  a lot of my work right now is like normalizing the fact that people can exist and it's not like, I just, regardless of whether or not you care or whether or not you feel about like feel right about it.

And I, I feel like. A lot of my content  moving forward will kind of, like, center that. I think  there's a lot of things where we talk about with people of color in the ADHD space where you're already, like, it's great that you don't have to mask, but there's a level of cold switching you have to do. But I feel like there's, there's, there's a lot of things about that space where there's, like, things that need to continue to be translated.

So I think my work starts there. This year, and I don't know where my work will can will lead me but I feel like at least making my existence normalized and just letting people know it's really not that really big, not even that big of a deal but like, I'm here and you can learn and if not then don't.

Yep.  

Yeah, no doubt very much New York in that way. I'm like, I whatever  super New York. Yeah,  my favorite was the bachata upstairs and the trap downstairs and everything like that. That was pretty accurate.  I is ADHD coaching in the future. 

ADHD coaching is in the future. People can ask about me.  I found that I could be perhaps inspiring.

Some people are saying this. I think it's a lot.  I think they're alive, but I'm being told that I've been inspiring. So I definitely want to.  At this point, I'd be a hypocrite said not because I feel like I've gotten so  it wasn't until like I realized when Jessica did the shout out, I was like, wait.  This is the same Jessica when I was like 24, you know what I mean, who inspired me, like, and that was like transformative.

Like, I knew in my mind, I was like, yeah, I'm gonna,  you know, be in the space helping people. But now that I'm here, it's kind of, it would be shitty of me to not help others and ask for people to How about this? Oh, coaching. Yes. 

Yeah. And that's the whole thing. I mean, as an organization,   my vision for us is always  a space in which we're, co working  and building the best organization that we can possibly have from safe spaces to valuable resources  to fun times, laughing, all these types of things are key parts of the work that we do. 

And at the same time, my intention is always to have this as a platform where anybody who is a part of our organization, like we all have our own individual things that we do on the side to like, I have my career as a speaker. Shane has a remarkable life coaching business, creating order from chaos.

Brendan's got ADHC essentials. So we want this to be a platform in which you are using your skill sets and your knowledge and your experience to benefit the members of our organization. But we're also giving a platform in which one can grow their business, meet future potential clients, host webinars, and build a name for themselves within the ADHD community.

I'm a big believer in,  working with anybody who's got value to bring to the table, period. So whether you're as big as ADHD Essentials or Translating ADHD, any of those platforms, or you're a small creator with a couple of hundred followers on Instagram and you're looking to build a name for yourself. 

 If you have work that's in alignment  to what we're doing as an organization, we want to work with you. We want to collaborate with you, like, whether it's  a video editor, a fellow podcast host, someone to host their own meetings. We're welcoming that all the time because I mean, you know, like. Dave out in Ireland, who's 12 hours in the future.

You know what I mean? We can't be hosting those meetings over here in New York City. We need someone like Dave to do that and give a platform to him. So we want to,  , we want to work with you. If you, if you are passionate about this type of stuff, if you've got a business of your own, that is in alignment with our ethics, you know, reach out.

I mean, we have that homepage on the men's ADHD support group and we have our emails available. So,  you know, it's, yeah.  It's a million times better when we,  I mean, anybody who went to the International ADHD conference can attest to this,  but when you're working by yourself and you're building a business all on your own, it's. 

It's really challenging to feel motivated or even get started, but when you're in a space full of people who are doing similar work, there's just something so inspiring and sustainable about that, that I would encourage to everyone and we absolutely 1000 percent provide that at the men's ADHD support group,  you know, so that's how I feel.

So, yeah,  that's how I feel. 

So, Kristian, is there any, any final, like, to our, to our listeners out there who are new to the organization and want to give it a go and join us and work with us? What are some words of encouragement you would say to them?  

When  I, so here's the thing, right? And I'll bring it back to, I'll bring it back to the, to the backpack in 2020 when we actually kind of like started, right?

It was just you and John and you had an idea about like, how to go and you had no idea it would look like this, right?  But I think what stood out to me  was when I said, I think I might have commented that I wanted to be there, but it was it was that you actually like DM me and was like, hey, just just set a reminder in your calendar.

I was like, oh,  it was it was something about the personalization of like, I'm going to reach out to Kristian and I'm going to. Remind him to remind myself where I realized like, oh, I'm getting I'm being given a tool or being affirmed to like, hey, this person sees me and knows that I don't really manage time doesn't judge me.

And it's like, it was like, just so simple in that. And I feel like. In that even that small interaction, I was able to get so much about the intent of what you were doing at that time,  and that's what really inspired me because like you can only make something like that greater. No one loses when you volunteer, no one's losing when you give yourself there like we gain your knowledge we gain your expertise, and we want to, we nurture that and we cultivate that.

Within the community and space that we have. Right? We are friends. You know what I mean? Like we are really cool friends. Like me and Shane are really cool friends. So it's not like, like,  it's not like a job. You know what I mean? It's like really us doing this groundwork to make  a livable space for men who have our experience.

And if you are interested in making  it easier for yourself, And for the people who come after you, I encourage you there's nothing you lose by at least filling out the at least filling out the form and having the conversation because even if you don't know where you fit in,  we talk too much. So we're gonna find something out.

So,  yeah, that's what I would say. We love you. We love you. And we want you here.  That's well, 

that's well said. And Shane, who's the Operations Director who's, who's, who's lurking in this zoom meeting just wrote in all caps, I will find you work.  No, no doubt. W we, we, we want to, to help individuals who want to make a difference within the ADHD community and we.

Want your help at the same time. So  impacting people  takes community and teamwork. And that's what we're all about in this organization. So, for anybody that's interested in in joining our team and getting to know a little bit more about us, men's ADHD support group. org, you'll find everything you need in the homepage to go and get that done.

And and Kristian, are you, are you at a place where you're putting yourself out there on social media? Like would people wanna, if people wanna follow you? 

Yeah, if you wanna follow me, I'm on Twitter and Instagram at da k Chris. D-A-T-K-I-D-K-R-I-S. You'll find me mostly on Instagram, on Twitter. I'm just like doing regular stuff, but stay tuned.

We'll,  we're getting it together. But yeah, follow may be cool with me. I'm not posting anything about like,  , anything serious yet. If you just want to be chill right now, but we'll continue to make content later.  I also, I also also think Kristian's one of the funniest people that I know. Yeah.

Come the funnies come for the laughs. Come for the lows. . 

Yeah. Yeah. I like you'll just be shit talking on TikTok recorder  

all day, every day. Every day. Yeah. It is my favorite. 

Yeah. And I appreciate you doing this chatting and Kristian, we appreciate all the work you do in, in our organization and just can't wait to to see what's next for.

The Men's ADHD Support Group. Awesome. All righty. Thank you all for listening. I hope you have a great rest of your day.  

Thanks y'all.