The Unequal Load in ADHD Partnerships with Dusty Chipura

Navigating relationships is already challenging—but when ADHD gets added to the mix, emotional labor, communication breakdowns, and resentment can quietly build up over time.

In this session, we are joined by Dusty Chipura—Master-Certified ADHD Coach and doula—to explore the unequal domestic load in ADHD partnerships. Dusty shares insights on why "trying harder" doesn't always fix relationship struggles, the role of gender dynamics, how emotional labor shows up, and practical tools to build healthier, more equal partnerships.

This event was hosted by the Men’s ADHD Support Group, a nonprofit dedicated to providing resources and community for men and masc-aligned individuals with ADHD.

🔗 Learn more about Dusty Chipura: ➡️https://www.vancouveradhdcoaching.com/our-team/

🎙️ Check out Dusty’s podcast, Translating ADHD: ➡️ https://www.translatingadhd.com/

📚 Resources mentioned:

• Fair Play Method by Eve Rodsky: https://www.fairplaylife.com/
• Christina Crowe’s ADHD & Relationships Work: https://www.christinacrowe.ca/
• Melissa Orlov's ADHD Marriage Support: https://www.amazon.com/stores/Melissa-Orlov/author/B003NK0RGG

Check out our website for great blogs, information, and upcoming events! Men's ADHD Support Group Website

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Chapters

• 0:00 The Unequal Load in ADHD Partnerships
• 1:20 Introducing Dusty, the ADHD Coach
• 2:00 Understanding the Unequal Load in ADHD Partnerships
• 3:17 Common Issues in ADHD Relationships
• 11:21 Impact of Gender Socialization on Domestic Roles
• 18:36 Emotional Labor and Mental Load in Relationships
• 27:26 Weaponized Incompetence and Its Effects
• 35:38 Strategies for Better Partnership Dynamics
• 40:27 Learning New Skills: A Personal Story
• 41:06 Effective Communication in Relationships
• 41:48 Proactive Support Strategies
• 43:42 Self-Advocacy and ADHD
• 44:36 Balancing Domestic Responsibilities
• 46:29 The Importance of Validation
• 48:48 Navigating Parenting Challenges
• 49:43 Resources and Tools for Better Living
• 51:13 Q&A Session: Real-Life Experiences