Real Leaders Have the Guts to Have HARD Conversations

It takes a brave person to be open. To speak your truth even when your voice shakes and to feel safe to show up as who you truly are is how warriors roll. Anyone can put on a mask. It’s easy to wear a suit of armour as you navigate this dangerous world. Yet to be raw and real and decent and good. Oh—that takes strength.  And true leadership.

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Transcript

Let's say one of your children or let's say someone in your family is sort of rubbing you the wrong way, usually at the dinner table or maybe it's at a family gathering. You don't say anything. Why don't you say this?  "Hey, so-and-so, can I have a few minutes to chat with you?" And then you go off into a private place. Because you never want to do this in public. You always want the other person to save face. And you say, "Hey, you know what? Here's been feeling." That's a great line. That's a great verbal cue."Here's what I've been experiencing in our relationship. And I really care about the relationship. And it's making me feel angry and I'm feeling really disappointed."This is really powerful. This shows someone who not only loves the relationship, and the other person. It's showing someone who respects themself. And so you say, "Here's what I've been experiencing and it really hurts me and it disappoints me, and sometimes I feel really angry and I want the relationship to last. Is there a way that we can find some solutions so I don't feel like this and whatever. What do you think about it?" And that gives the other person the space to say, "Well, I had no idea." Or, "Thank you for letting me know." Or, "Well, I'm upset too and here's what I feel and here's what I've been experiencing and I'm frustrated about this." And then you can say, "Wow, I didn't know that."And it's hard and it takes bravery, but if you practice it, you get stronger, and you learn to be a better communicator. And this builds the relationship not only with the person at work or the person in the restaurant or the person within your home or family, most importantly it builds the relationship with yourself.