Ali V. Part 2 | VBAC, midwifery care, hospital birth with epidural, NICU, HIE

In today’s episode of Moony Birth Stories, Ali is back for a solo episode to share her second pregnancy and birth story with her daughter, Charlotte. She shares about her pregnancy under midwifery care, her plan and preparation for a vaginal birth after cesarean (VBAC), and her vaginal delivery with an epidural. During birth, her daughter experienced Hypoxic-Ischemic Encephalopathy (HIE) which is a brain injury caused by reduced blood flow or oxygen to a baby’s brain. Charlotte spent 9 days in the NICU where she underwent cooling therapy to reduce further brain swelling. Ali shares her NICU experience, including postpartum recovery, pumping, and the emotional toll. 

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Transcript

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Hi everyone and welcome back to Moony Birth Stories. This is going to be a solo episode because I'm gonna be sharing the pregnancy and birth story of my daughter, Charlotte. So this is my second baby. I previously shared my first story of my son Jackson on the podcast. So you can go back and listen to that.

But basically a quick recap of my first birth is I had an unplanned C-section because he was breech. And so this time

 I was going into my second birth wanting a V back, and so it was around nine months postpartum with my son that my husband and I. Wanted to start trying for another baby. We felt we wanted our kids close in age.

We somehow felt ready at nine months. And so yeah, we started trying and we were very thankful to conceive on our first month trying. And so my due date with Charlotte was November 19th, 2024, and that would make my a 18 month age gap between my kids. And so at that time we were actually living in Calgary and so I had applied to a midwife there and I had gotten on with them.

It's a little bit easier to get a midwife in Calgary than it is in Saskatoon, so I was very thankful to get on with a midwife. I had my. First ultrasound with Charlotte, I think around nine weeks. And everything was good. I was feeling pretty good besides feeling extremely tired, especially because I was chasing around a small child.

And so yeah, I just remember feeling very tired. But yeah, I had, a pretty uneventful pregnancy. I had my anatomy scan at 20 weeks and we found out we were having a girl, which was very exciting. I, yeah, honestly felt very good throughout my pregnancy. And then about halfway through that pregnancy, we did move back to Saskatoon, and so I contacted my midwife that I was moving back and asked her if they had space to take me on.

And they did. So then I immediately started seeing her again. But yeah, I was honestly feeling very good throughout this pregnancy. I was keeping up with going to the chiropractor and doing massage, which is the same thing that I did with my first pregnancy. And with my first pregnancy, I did have gestational diabetes, so I honestly went into this pregnancy fully expecting to have gestational diabetes, and I was watching what I was eating.

I did also start tracking my blood sugar a little bit, and all of my readings were. Completely fine. And so when it did come time to do the gestational diabetes screening, I just asked my midwife if I could go right to the fasting two hour test. And so that's what we did. And to my surprise, I, my blood sugars came back within the normal range and I did not have gestational diabetes.

So that was something that I was very surprised about, but very happy because it's not a lot of fun. But although one thing I was thankful for with having gestational diabetes with my first is it really did allow me to focus on what I was putting in my body and how I was moving my body, and it really did make for a healthy pregnancy.

And so I did take a lot of those into my second pregnancy. Yeah, although did indulge because I could this time around and so yeah, the. With having, with planning a VBAC this time around, I had the option of planning for home birth or hospital birth planning for a water birth in the hospital. I had all my options open at this point, and after talking to my husband and talking to my midwife, I did decide to have a.

A hospital birth. That's honestly just where my husband and I felt the most comfortable and truthfully, planning a home birth and then ending up having a C-section, it just ended up being a lot of work. And I didn't wanna have to plan for home birth, set up the birth pool plan, all these things, if there was a potential that I had to go into the hospital.

It just seemed like a lot of work at the time and we just, my husband and I both were, just weren't up for it. And yeah, we did plan a. Hospital birth, and I did have a doula this time around. The birth photographer that I did have in my first pregnancy was no longer taking photos, which I was very sad about 'cause I would have loved to have photos of this birth.

But I did opt to have a doula just because I did feel like I needed more of that doula role support this time around. And, and yeah. The rest of my pregnancy again, yeah. Was just uneventful. I was, oh, and then another thing that was on the top of my mind was the position of baby, because after you have a breach baby, you, I was just worried that I was, that was gonna be, that was gonna happen again.

And so something that I did throughout my pregnancy was I really focused on how I was, how my body. My, the position of my body. So I made sure that I was never like reclined or yeah, like laying reclined. Like anytime I wanted to relax I was always in a side lying position and made sure to do focus a lot on Yeah, like movement and it wasn't very hard because I was chasing around a toddler and so yeah, I felt like I was a lot more active this time around and was really focusing on.

Being in like sideline positions if I did want to rest. And again, I was doing chiro and massage in my first pregnancy. I did continue it the second time around. And so yeah, I feel like I went into it with the mindset of, you know what, like I can only do so much, and then the rest of it is up to my baby and my body.

And so then we did decide to do a third trimester ultrasound just to assess for baby's position and. I so thankful. She was head down, and then, so after I got that ultrasound at 36 weeks, I was feeling very hopeful and very excited going into my birth that, you know what her position is good. I had worked through a lot of stuff like on my own and oh, I did also see a counselor and so I was worked through my previous birth.

I had talked to my doula, lots of talking with my husband, lots of talking with my midwife, and so I was feeling very confident going into my vbac and so I got to the point of at 38 weeks. Was the point where I had my son. And so I was feeling like, okay I've made it to this same time. I've never been, this pregnant before.

And so it was exciting. And the end of pregnancy is my favorite. And I think I said this in my previous birth story, that just this end of pregnancy time, just the excitement and anticipation of a baby coming is there's just feel no other feeling. And then it was when I was 39 and four, I believe.

I think it was 39 and four. It was definitely in my 39th week. I woke up around midnight to starting to feel contractions, and at this point I was like, okay, I know that these are contractions. It just felt like in my lower belly, like those. Like very mild pre period cramps. And so I just tried to continue sleeping.

They were keeping me up at this point, and so what I did was I took gravel and Tylenol and tried to get some rest. Was hoping that would allow me to get any sort of rest. And honestly, from about midnight to 5:00 AM I just. Was laying in my bed maybe on and off sleeping, but my contractions were coming.

I was not timing them at this point, I was just riding the wave and then I think it was around 5:00 AM that my husband woke up to my noises, as he likes to say. And yeah, I told him, yeah, these have been happening since midnight. And so he, we woke up and we. I went downstairs and then I just, yeah I think we started timing them at that point.

And they were like, they, there was a pattern, I don't know exactly how far apart they were, but there was like, they were coming consistently. And then I remember my son waking up around seven in the morning and he was, he was an 18 month old. He wanted his mom and he. I was trying to ride these contractions and I'm just like, holy moly, I need to go be in my own space.

And so I went upstairs. I remember having a shower, and then I think I went downstairs. We had breakfast, and then I told my husband, I was like, you need, you guys need to go. I just need to be alone right now. And my husband's I don't want to leave you. And I'm just like this out. You'll be, you're not gonna go far.

I will call you if anything is happening. I just need to be in my own space. And so they left. I think they just ran a couple errands. I know they for sure went to the grocery store and I went upstairs. I ran a bath and I just labored in the bath for a couple hours. They came back. My husband brought me a snack that I don't think I touched.

And then I was, we were trying to decide do we put my son down for a nap or do we call our friend? 'cause my son was gonna go to a friend's house. We went to have this baby, and so I was like, do we put him down for a nap or do we get her to come pick him up? And ultimately we decided, you know what?

Let's just have her pick him up. Then it can just be me and my husband. And then, so she did, and then at this point, we called my midwife. I had called my doula earlier that morning just to let her know what was happening. But then it wasn't until, yeah, it was after. After 12:00 PM that we had called my midwife.

And so just told her what was happening and then we had decided that we would go into the hospital. I think my contraction at this point were like five minutes apart. So like they were pretty consistent. They were getting intense, but I was managing very well in the bath. And then I remember when we were calling her and we came up with a plan that we would go meet at the hospital for 2:00 PM And I remember telling my husband, I was like, I just, I don't think it's time.

And he's ally, your contractions are coming five minutes apart. Like they are consistent. What do you mean this isn't time? And I was like, I just, I feel too calm. I feel, I just feel good. And, but I just decided, you know what, we will go at two. And then when we met with my midwife, even when we walked in, I remember I was just like, I just don't feel like this is time yet.

I feel like I should be. More it I was like questioning if I should have came there. 'cause I was like, I don't wanna come too early. And yeah. So anyways she did check me and I was like, please just be enough to be admitted. That's all I wanted. And she checked me and I was at six, between six and seven centimeters.

And at that moment I was like, holy moly, I. I was so excited and so happy that I could be admitted. And then also I, that had only been, I hadn't made it to that point with my son, and so I was like, wow. Like I was feeling very confident that I was able, that I was going to do this, that I was gonna have vaginal delivery.

And so then we called my doula. She came over to the hospital, we moved over to the room that I would be laboring in, and because I. Was a vbac, they did need to have me on the monitors for just like 20 minutes. I think. Just like a they just needed that 20 minutes of monitoring. And then I had talked to my midwife that she was okay with me not being on monitors.

And so they had set me up with the one, the monitor that you could still walk around the room. And then I remember. Just telling, like asking them like, oh, can you gimme some orange juice? Can you gimme some cheese? And I just remember, oh, gimme a birth ball. And like ordering them around. I was like, this is so fun to be on the other side of this.

'cause normally I'm used to being the doula who is doing all of these things. And so I was like, wow, it's so fun. And at this point, yeah, I was feeling really good. And like the contractions, like when they were happening were very intense and they were coming, at a consistent. Five minutes apart.

And then after the monitoring, I just said, you know what? I feel like fine, I was still able to move around. I was on a birth ball, I was standing at the bedside swaying, and I was like, we can just keep the monitors on. They weren't bother, they weren't bothering me. And so we did that and then we just kept, rocking it out and then.

Then at some point I did ask for the laughing gas. That was one option that I was, and going into this I didn't wanna plan for a water birth and I was okay. I was open to laughing gas, I was open to the epidural. There was no, I had no set.

Yeah, I was open to the meds. And so I got the laughing gas at this point, which I did feel like really helped. My only advice with it is to make sure, like as soon as you start to feel a contraction, get that mask on and start breathing it in. Because yeah, you, so you, what you do is you breathe it in during contractions and then in between you take it off and then yeah.

You just need to be on top of it to make sure that you get its full effect. And so I did feel like that really helped. And then my midwife did check me again and I was at nine centimeters with a cervical lip. So it was basically like I was almost fully dilated, but then there was like a side of my cervix that was still there and present.

And at this point, my midwife did ask me if I wanted to have a. My water broke, yeah, if she wanted, if I was okay with her breaking my water. And so I said yes because I was like, you know what? We are so close. I think if we break my water, it'll just give that extra little push to, to get this labor going, and I will be holding my daughter soon.

And so we did break my water.

And then, so after breaking my water, I do remember feeling like it labor getting quite intense at that point. And then my midwife tried to hold back the cervical lip as I was going through a contraction. And let me tell you. The most excruciating pain of my life was that moment. I just remember immediately telling her to stop, which she did, and I was like, no, I need an epidural.

I was like this I've gone this far. It's great, but I'm ready for that epidural. And so they were very quick to get on it. They got me my epidural and then after that, my baby's heart rate began to start dipping, just having some D cells. They were moving me from side to side. And then they did have the OB come in consults and he had watched, a few contractions.

He had watched the monitors and everything had been. Okay. At that point, like baby's heart rate I think kinda went back to normal or they were happy with how baby's heart rate was coming back up. And then it was around eight that evening, 8:00 PM that I started to push. I was yeah, ready for pushing. I had asked for mirror so that I could watch everything happening and.

Yeah, I tried pushing on hands and knees. I tried pushing on my side. I tried pushing on my back and then it was ultimately in sideline that I did feel the most comfortable pushing. And yeah, we went for pushing for almost two hours, which was a lot. And it was quite intense. Then I could start.

And then I did start to see my daughter's head emerging, which was very encouraging. And then as her head started to come out, her heart rate did start to dip again. And so then my midwife was just like, okay, Ali, like we need to, this baby needs to come out. You need to push as hard as you can. And then, so her head was born and the cord was wrapped around.

Her neck, which my midwife was able to go in and slip it back over. And then on the next contraction I was pushing to get the rest of her body out. And then things had slowed at that point. And then the nurses, they had thought it was a shoulder dystocia. So they had rolled me onto my back, lifted my legs up, and then.

What happened was her arm was across her body just making it a little bit more difficult for her to come out. And so she was born and then she was not breathing at that point, and so they clamped her cord immediately, took her over to the warmer so that NICU team could look her over.

And at that point I was like. Like feeling okay. And I was just like, you know what? This she just needs a little bit of help. I have seen this before in births, and then they did need to intubate her and immediately take her up to the nicu. And so my husband went with her, my doula stayed with me, and then there was.

Problems with my placenta coming out. It was just being a little bit stubborn, and so they had called the OB back, I think it was after like 30 or 40 minutes that they had called the OB back just to come in and see what was going on. And so yeah, he had to manually remove and check. Uterus to make sure all of my placenta was out.

So I was very thankful for the epidural at this point. And then after that, the NICU there, the nurses came and cleaned me up. And then I wanted to go see my daughter in the nicu.

And then, so at this point I was just like, you know what? She just needed a little bit of help. And then, so I went up to the nicu, or I think my husband came down, grabbed me. We went up together. And then it was at that point that they had told me that it was a little more serious than what I had thought.

And so she had gone without oxygen for quite a long time. They don't know what that means for her. For her little brain. And so what it's called is, it's called hypoxic ischemic encephalopathy, I believe HIE is what the acronym is. And so she, what they needed to do for her was they basically, they cool her body I believe, to help stop any further brain injury. And so yeah, it was going to be an, yeah, we were in for a longer NICU stay than I had thought. We were in for an unknown, just a lot of unknowns for at that time, because we didn't know what this meant for her brain. We don't know. What could happen is like she could have.

Physical learning delays. And so yeah, it was a lot to take in at that time 'cause I was just like, truly did not think that's what was happening. And yeah, there was just so many people working on her and they were very quick, they were very good in the nicu. They were very quick to get on it and just to determine that's what she needed.

And I just remember my husband and I going back to our room and just feeling,

just feeling so scared and we were just like numb. I just remember like we both just, we just both held each other and like we didn't talk and we were just like. We were just numb, like honestly don't even know how to feel. And I truthfully felt a lot of guilt because I felt had, like a VBAC was so important to me and it felt like had I just, planned another C-section, then none of this would've happened to her.

If I.

I would have done something differently throughout my labor, then this wouldn't have happened to her. And so I just, I did feel a lot of guilt yeah, and it was also very hard because I, we were just thinking of my son and we are just like this, we just don't know what. The future's gonna look like, and we just, we know we didn't get that, we didn't get the golden hour, obviously.

We didn't get that special meeting of siblings. And so it just felt like a lot was taken from us in that moment. And so the next morning I remember the doctor was gonna come for rounds at. Okay, I'll, I'm gonna go back. So I think my husband and I got back to our room. It was like maybe just after midnight, maybe around 1:00 AM.

And so I was like, you know what? I need to start pumping. And that was like the only thing on my mind. I was like, you know what, the one thing I can do for her is get some milk for her. And so we got back to the room and you see the little bassinet there that your baby should be in. And so I just remember telling the nurse, I was like, can you please get that out of here?

And yeah, so the one thing I felt like I could do for her was get her milk. So I immediately started hand expressing and, 'cause I wanted to encourage my milk to come in, even if, we couldn't feed right away.

And yeah, I don't think I got any sleep that night really. Like I maybe rested my head but didn't really get much sleep. And then the nurses are in and out, and I remember it was sometime in the middle of the night that. The nurse had asked if I'd gone to the bathroom to gone pee, and I said, no, I haven't.

And so I tried and I could not pee. Like I, this was not something that I had experienced with my first, and so I was like, I just can't pee. And so they had to do the bladder scan on me and they deter, they saw like I had a lot of pee in there and so they did an In-N-Out catheter and then I remember it was the morning.

Time that the doctor was gonna come and do rounds up in the NICU at 8:00 AM and so I told my nurse like, I wanna be up there for. For 8:00 AM and then she's okay have you peed? And I was just like, Nope. And so they did another bladder scan on me and she was, and it was, again, I had a lot, I had a lot of urine and I just, I couldn't go to the bathroom.

And so they had to do another in Neno catheter. And then after that was all done, I was able to go up to the NICU and yeah, we had talked to the doctor. They had explained everything that was gonna be happening. We met our nurse, she was. Absolutely amazing. Like truly, our nurse and the NICU made our NICU experience better and she was she was with us for four days.

I'm so happy that she was there on a four, four days because it was just like such, she was so kind and so genuine, and. She helped us navigate the nicu. So yeah, she was amazing. And then, yeah, I think I just spent that whole day up there. I started pumping at that point, and then my husband did go home or went to pick up our son and took him home, and then they came.

Back that night and my son, the kids aren't allowed up in the nicu. So then we were back on maternal services and we remember we had a little McDonald's picnic. So up until that point, I had never spent a night away from my son. And so it was very hard.

It was very hard when my husband took him home and I was alone. My one baby was at home and my other one was upstairs in the nicu just like the loneliest feeling. But yeah, I was still waking up every three hours to pump and I was getting a good amount of milk. My milk came in pretty quickly and yeah, I was, I really kept up with the pumping schedule and I will say if it wasn't for me and my knowledge.

I don't think I would have been able to keep up with the pumping. And then I was discharged from maternal services. So then I honestly just spent a lot of my time in the NICU just pumping. And then I did go home. 'cause I wasn't able, my daughter was, because of the cooling, she, we weren't able to hold her.

We hadn't heard her. Cry like she was just like, she was on a lot of drugs to keep her comfortable. And so yeah, there, honestly, there wasn't much for me to do at the nicu, so I did go home and sleep at home and then I was able to be with my son at home and yeah, still just waking up to pump and I remember like immediately like the hunger.

Breastfeeding pumping immediately after birth. It is insane. Like I would just remember like shoving my face when I was pumping at 2:00 AM. And then, oh, another thing was I did eventually pee. It was painful because I did, oh, I did tear and did I tear? Why do I not remember? No, I didn't tear. Gosh, it's only been a year, but I didn't tear, but I did have some small scrapes, which makes it very painful to pee.

It burns. And, but other than that, like I was feeling pretty good, like with postpartum recovery and everything that had happened. And so yeah, I was honestly just back and forth from. NICU to home. My in-laws did come and help us so that they could be here with my son. And so my husband and I were able to spend some time in the nicu.

We had an amazing community of support that were there to make us meals and just like lots of encouragement and yeah, it was a wild experience. And then I think it was on. Day three or four that my daughter was gonna come off the cooling, they were gonna warm her body and then at that point I was gonna be able to hold her.

And yeah, it was a very special time. My husband and I were there 'cause yeah, my in-laws were taking care of Jackson at home and so yeah, we were able to hold her. And then it all happened very quickly that like they were able to take like her breathing tube out and then they were able, they were like, you can start feeding her.

And then, so yeah, it was at that point, once I was able to start breastfeeding, then I was staying at the nicu. And the toughest part was. One, you're not able to eat in the NICU room. And so like you're trying, like I felt it felt so odd to leave my baby and I had to go eat somewhere else and then I had to, I was like pumping for her and then I had to leave to go wash my pump parts.

It just felt very weird to just leave her. But I was like, obviously she was being taken care of by the nurses and. And yeah, you feel like you have to ask permission to do things with your own baby. Although they were very encouraging and just they were like, just, do your thing.

You can, you're her mom, you get to take care of her. But yeah it still was a very weird feeling. And then I remember giving her first bath and yeah, feeding was going very well. Yeah, everything was just looking very positive at that point. But the doctors, they weren't able to tell us what her development was gonna look like, and they were just basically some babies do really well and some, some maybe have some delays.

So what we were waiting for at that point, like she was. Doing good. And we were going to go into the weekend and what we were waiting for was, and to go for an MRI and so they weren't able to get us in on that Friday. And then, so it was gonna be like Saturday and Sunday were, and nothing was gonna happen.

And then Monday they were able to get us in for an MRI. And so she went for that MRI and where it was determined that she had experienced moderate HIE. Again, it honestly meant nothing because they weren't able to tell us what that was gonna look like for her. And then we were able to go home at that point and we had, my husband and my son came to pick us up in the NICU and we had the little sibling meet, meet up just like outside the NICU doors.

And it it obviously was not what I had pictured, but it was. It was very cute looking back and we brought her home and I remember feeling like she has been monitored 24 7 her entire life. Like how do we just bring her home and yeah. So it was a little bit like, I dunno, there was some feelings with that, but everything was okay and I didn't honestly have.

As much anxiety as I thought I would but yeah, everything was honestly really good. We. Our midwife came and did the visits at home. But yeah, so then after we were home, like feeding had gone really well. She did have a tongue and lip tie, so we went and got that lasered with a dentist. And yeah, our feeding journey was honestly very smooth.

Like I had pumped a lot of milk for her and then she had latch beautifully when we were in the NICU and like just continued that after we got her tongue lip tied done. And so yeah, feeding has gone very well, thankfully. Postpartum recovery was good for me. It was, so I've gotten asked what's the difference between a C-section recovery and a vaginal delivery recovery, and I don't feel like I can really comment very well on it because my vaginal delivery, it was easier than a C-section recovery.

However, because I was back and forth from the nicu, I wasn't really caring for myself as I should have been. It was it still felt hard and it, so it didn't feel like I recovered as fast or as well as I could have had we not had that NICU stay. But overall, yes, a vaginal delivery was easier and yeah, it was just while taking care of a newborn and a 18 month old yeah, it was busy times and yeah.

But now at. My daughter is almost 16 months old and she is doing very good and she has developed on a very good path. And yeah we'll just, we just take it and see where the future holds for us. But as of right now, she is doing very good. And yeah, so that's our story. Thank you for listening to it.