Last week, Ash Prasad and I discussed the need for safe workspaces. This week I covered similar themes with Joy Fowler, diversity & inclusion program manager at the Port of Portland. I met Joy 20+ years ago after we both gave birth to 24-weeker preemies. We volunteered together on Legacy Emanuel’s NICU Family Advisory Board. After Amir passed away in 2012, Joy and her husband Allen founded A MIRacle Foundation, Inc. to help special needs children.
A native New Yorker, Joy moved to Portland and got married after college. She had her son James after that. When she got divorced, her mom tried to lure her back to New York, but Joy had made friends and connected with the Zeta Sigma Omega Chapter of the Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority.
Joy met Allen in a group of Portland transplants. When James was seven, Joy got pregnant. She started spotting and got put on bedrest. By 24 weeks, she knew something was not right. On September 14, 1998, Amir was born weighing 786 grams. One word to describe Amir during his NICU stay of 105 days: FEISTY!
Unfortunately, at a year and a half, Amir had his first seizure. Six months later, it happened again. The next one lasted for six hours. As he grew, the seizures kept coming. Amir wasn’t learning how to walk or talk as well as he should and he was in a wheelchair by kindergarten. Before Amir passed away, they learned he had a rare degenerative disorder. “We couldn’t have asked for a better, more determined, more driven little person than him.”
Caring for a special needs child is expensive. That’s partially why they started the foundation, to help other families. “...The day he passed away, it hit me. I just knew I had to help other children.”
They chose to honor Amir’s memory by starting A MIRacle Foundation, Inc., one of the most healing experiences Joy has ever had. They support 2,500 medically fragile children with home hospital beds, adaptive seating, wheelchairs, walkers, and supplies.
We switched gears to talk about Black Lives Matter. Joy has to be mindful that some people are coming to work traumatized, while others are trying to learn. She was glad the Port of Portland police asked to start having conversations. Working with the Alliance of Black Employees, they started weekly “conscious conversations” and have had 100-200 people participate.
Joy decided to leave banking after 34 years. She feels lucky to have found a place that feels like home. She feels a complete freedom at the Port of Portland. “It’s been one of the most liberating, eye-opening experiences.”
She gets to be her authentic self every day. She feels supported, and that has improved her health because this kind of work is hard, especially as a woman of color.
We talked about what it was like when she first started in banking. The sexism and racism took her aback. She’d make excuses, thinking, “they didn’t really mean it like that.” She overlooked a lot to get ahead. “I will not cover any more, because it can affect your health...it’s too much to bear.”
“Joy just shows up as Joy. I will never go back now that I’ve had a taste of how it makes me feel.”
"Amir taught me about love, compassion, understanding, meeting people where they’re at, leading with love, and allowing me to speak to people at multiple ends of the DEI spectrum...raising him and losing him taught me so much.”
Next week I interview my friend Jasnam Daya Singh, a concert and jazz pianist and brilliant composer. He is also a Sikh. Jasnam is one of the kindest, most gentle people I know.