Blossom Your Awesome Podcast Intention Reset With Barry Nicolaou

Blossom Your Awesome Podcast Intention Reset With Barry Nicolaou

Barry Nicolaou joins us to talk about Intention Reset - How Our Thoughts Become Things and the science behind that.

He is also talking about his latest book -

Move the Mountain. Intention Reset .

Barry's ability to locate and define his true purpose in assisting others began in 2015.
 
Barry is the author of the  #1 Best Selling book on Amazon -

 The 11 Master Secrets to Business Success and Personal Fulfillment - the book outlines the 11 areas that intersect economic freedom with personal fulfillment.

Barry's forte' is in deconstructing the layers beneath cognitive fear, indecision, subconscious paradigms, Inherited thinking, habitual thinking and their intimate relationship to real-world expectations and experiences.

To learn more about Barry click here.

To see more of my work check me out at my website

Where I write and cover mindfulness and other things to help you Blossom Your Awesome.

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Transcript

Sue (00:00.978)
Hi there. Today on the show, we have got Barry Nicolaou here with us. I am so honored and delighted to have you here. Welcome to the show.

Barry Nicolaou (00:09.473)
Thank you Sue, thank you for having me. It's beautiful to be here with you.

Sue (00:14.366)
Oh, I'm so happy to have you here all the way from Australia. Thank you so much. So, Barry, getting into the work you do, you are an author, you are a mindset facilitator, mindset coach, you've got two books out, you give us the backstory, how and why you got into this line of work.

Barry Nicolaou (00:35.065)
Absolutely and it's not to actually speak about it because our journeys sometimes differ and mine was a roller coaster ride, Sue So it was back in 2015. I was in the shoe industry in Sydney, Australia Very perplexed about my career path just was a little bit disheartened as most of us are some of us that are earning money You know we go and we pay our bills and we go on our holidays and we have our fun But I guess for me there was a hole inside that wasn't exactly being filled

And I was on my way to an appointment, like a shoe appointment. And I got a phone call in the car and they said, Barry, I need you to I need you to delay my appointment one hour. And I said, I can do that. That's fine. And the next thing that happened was kind of surreal. My car steered itself. It felt like it steered itself into this beautifully appointed cemetery in the northwestern suburbs of Sydney. And I don't know anyone that's buried there. I don't know anyone. I don't have any connection to this place.

So I just more or less wanted to kill the hour. So I get out of my car and just think of the most beautiful cemetery you can imagine, you know, canopy of trees and big wide open roads and you kind of feel a sense of peace as well when you're there, you just, you are with your maker. You know, you feel like you're in a state of, I was in a state of vulnerability as well because I knew that there was this holding me that I didn't know how to feel. And as I was walking amongst the graves, so you'd start to do the maths between the years where people...

people were born and people passed away. And you realize something quite profound. You realize that they're not 80 and 90 year olds in those graves as 20 and 30 and 40 and 50 year olds. And that got me into an emotional state because I'm like, well, we don't know how long we have. And if you wanted to know, would you really wanna know sort of thing? And I was sitting there 38 years old, 39 years old going, oh, what have I done with my life? And at that point I leant up against my car.

And I felt three words that were communicated on a level that I hadn't experienced before. And those three words were live your life. And I thought, what the greatest epiphany, you know, if you want to give me something, give me the lottery numbers, that would be awesome. Then I could really live my life. But got to a stage where I kind of it impacted me, but I just I just dismissed it. I went to my appointment, went home, had dinner.

Barry Nicolaou (02:58.637)
didn't tell my wife about it, just kind of went to sleep. And at 3 a.m. I had this surreal dream and I woke up in a cold sweat. And the word your, like Y-O-U-R, was burning in my conscious, right? I'm like, oh, live your life. Don't try and live a life based on somebody else's projections or their opinions or their own circumstances. Live a life that's true to you. Like, what have you come here to do?

And I started just writing at 3 a.m. in the morning. It was a surreal experience. I just started writing about the things that lit me up and the things that really got my fire burning. And it was people that had come from ultimate tragedy and ultimate hardship that have gone to ultimate success and enlightenment. And you think to yourself, how have they done this? You know, and why aren't the rest of us on this kind of journey? Why have we?

created noise about routine and work and tax and bills and that's our life. You know, it ends up being this, this hamster wheel and a lot of us don't actually search for the deeper meaning. And I was in that search. So I just started writing and a year later, you know, six AM mornings, a year later, I had this thing that looked like a book. I know no one in the publishing industry. I know no connections. I've got no idea how to even get this thing published. And this is how the universe works. I think when you're on your path.

I get a Facebook message and the Facebook message was, we publish books. If you have a manuscript, we'd love to hear from you. And I'm like, that's random or is it? So I get in touch with the publishing house in Sydney. We got to Amazon, we got to number one, I believe in six countries and 19 categories. And that was the catalyst for me getting my stuff out, my internal stuff out.

And from then it's been a real roller coaster ride. So yeah. Yeah.

Sue (04:52.598)
Wow, that is so amazing. And now the book, 11 Master Secrets to Business Success and Personal Fulfillment. Can you fill us in on this? Give us the secrets or some of the secrets. Lay those out. No, no, please just give us some of that, all the insights from that.

Barry Nicolaou (05:05.253)
Well listen, yeah go for it, I cut you off.

Barry Nicolaou (05:11.189)
Yes. Listen, listen, and if you're into, and the first book was meant to have, and it has, the rules, I guess, or the secrets of, say, personal wealth or freedom, financial freedom, and personal fulfillment, I wanted those two worlds to collide. Because what I found, Sue, is that there are a lot of wealthy people that just have that hole inside of them that I was speaking about before. Money doesn't necessarily fill it all the time. I mean, money buys you freedom.

really buys you time to do what you want. But there is the purpose of life or the purpose of your life that necessarily doesn't get filled by money. And I wanted those two worlds to collide. So what I found was 11 areas that actually had those two worlds collide. And if you do wanna know what they are, I suggest it's only a hundred page read. And I think you can buy it on Amazon for like six or $7 by the book.

And it's something that you'll take home with you. And you'll, you know, you might forget about this conversation that we're having, but the book will always be there. So buy the book. And the second book was released in February this year. And that's a deeper dive into how our thoughts scientifically become things. And the seeds that we plant in our lives that we don't unconsciously plant, and how those materialize into life experiences that we either want or we don't want. So I guess...

For me, the journey and especially in the corporate space, it's about instilling these mindset keys to make sure that we understand that we are the facilitators of our future. And unless we get really specific, unless we put our gardening gloves on and start to get into our backyards and front yards, start to cultivate that soil and look at where the sunlight's coming in, where the hose is, and just really get enthralled into this personal space that is yours, this garden of your mind, then...

Yeah, we start to get very specific about the thoughts and the nutrition and the sleep and the family and the friends and the toxicity and the whole of it. It starts to get very specific. It's less, less of what life throws at you, but more how you kind of take that and let it flow into your life.

Sue (07:19.158)
Now, Barry, I know what some of your specialty is this idea of cognitive fair, indecision, subconscious paradigms. Give us a breakdown here on cognitive fair. Talk to us about that. What is that for people who don't know?

Barry Nicolaou (07:28.077)
Yeah. Yes.

Barry Nicolaou (07:36.853)
Okay, so I guess what the best thing to do at this point is if you have a pattern pen, this is a great time if you are in the car if you're driving or if you have a pattern pen or if you can record this episode or listen to it again. Take note of these areas because what I'm about to explain is I guess how our thoughts do germinate into things. And then what we'll also talk about Sue if you're interested is the six steps to achieving what you would like to achieve in your life. And this all comes down to cognitive fear and cognitive gratitude as well, right?

So I'd like you to consider a doctor and you go into the doctor's office and you ask the doctor and you say, doctor, I know that my skin and bones is matter. I know I can actually feel my arm in my hand and that's matter, I get that. But what's inside matter? I wanna know what's inside my body. And the doctor will say, well Barry, you've got cells and you can buy that, right? And you ask, well, what's inside cells? Because I wanna understand how my body functions and where my thoughts come from. And inside cells, what you have are molecules.

and you go down further still because you're excited and you're interested and you say, well, what's inside molecules? And he'll say, well Barry, atoms are inside molecules. And because you're a curious soul, you keep pressing and you say, what's inside molecule? Oh, what's inside atoms? And he said, well Barry, inside atoms is subatomic particles. Now this is where things get really cool because if you look at subatomic particles under an electron microscope, the doctor will say, there's these little tiny things called quarks.

Q-U-A-R-K-S and you can Google them and have a look at what they are. Now quarks are subject to what we call the observer effect. So looking at a quark under an electron microscope its molecular structure will shift and you ask yourself well what's making it shift like that back and forth? I don't understand how that's actually happening. And all the research that I've found the only thing that makes quarks shift is thought. Thinking a specific thought at a certain time

causes a quark to shift in a specific dynamic, that goes right up the food chain to matter. So you start to realize that you've got 75 trillion cells in your body. And if you believe something is fearful, or if you believe that something is possible, then those quarks are taking instructions from your external or internal environment that is saying that something is the way that it is, right?

Barry Nicolaou (09:55.785)
So if you want to shift dynamic, if you want to shift direction, if you want to shift consciousness, shift mindset, all you have to really do is introduce a new paradigm, which is basically this, is it possible for my dream to become a reality? Is that I just, I don't want you to go and kind of go, Oh yeah, it's Tony Robbins and it's all great and it's all fantastic. And we're all kind of shouting. No, I just want you to go, is this a possibility for me? Like a quiet moment, a personal quiet moment?

for you to even lock yourself in the cupboard and go, right, it's just me in the darkness right now, is this possible for me? And the answer, if you really, if you look around the world, the answer is yes, it's possible, because there are other people in the world that have it. So it's not like it's not true, right? This is actually a true thing. And you start to convince the subconscious mind that the future that you want is past fear.

and it's into gratefulness and understanding and possibility. Once that's an understanding and it's a belief, circumstances in life tend to shift to match that belief. And then that's when people use the word lucky, or Barry got lucky or Sue got lucky or someone got lucky. It's not luck. It's got nothing to do with luck. It's about you changing the thoughts within changes the reality. The best analogy to use Sue and this is super cool to consider it this way. If you're kind of an unfit person and you decide to get fit, you go to the gym,

You look at your nutrition, right? And you start to work out and you start to watch what you eat. And all of a sudden you go to the gym for a week and you look in the mirror and nothing's changed. And then you go to the second week, you look in the mirror, it looks the same. My body's not ripped. I'm not cut up. I'm not fit, but I've been going for two weeks. What's going on? You go the third and the fourth week and you don't really look different, but something changes. You feel different. You get up off the floor quicker. You jump steps two at a time.

You don't necessarily get puffed doing the things that you used to do before you were fit and you start to feel the difference before you see the difference. Eventually three to six months down the road, your body is completely transformed. And then someone asks you, well, how did you do it? And you say, well, consistency, I just kept at it. But the big thing to ferret out is that things have to happen internally before you can see that projection externally. The problem with us is that.

Barry Nicolaou (12:19.601)
internal work is hard work. And no one sees it. So we're not necessarily obliged to do it. It's a very disciplined practice that a lot of us, some of us do. And some of us don't. If you decide to embrace that discipline practice internally, your life will change as a consequence, regardless of what you think, regardless of what you believe. But if you don't decide to change that internal environment,

then it's very hard to expect the world or your circumstances to be able to change as a consequence because honestly, this is going to sound harsh, but you're not ready for that change. You've got to be ready on the inside and then just go, right. I've had enough. I'm uncomfortable. Um, I know I can do better. I know I can be better. I know that my purpose is this. What's the first step to doing that? Right. I want to get fit. I want to get my body fit, which means that my mind will be fit, which means that I'll be able to go the distance.

And that's going to be an internal decision. And unless that becomes an internal choice, then it becomes very difficult in the outside world to see any difference in your life. So yeah.

Sue (13:28.606)
And now, Barry, let me ask you, you know, the subconscious mind, because so often we can be saying on the outside, hey, I want to get better, I want to improve, I want to do better, but deep down inside, we don't really believe that. So how, what is your guidance? What's some practical guidance there for reprogramming the subconscious?

Barry Nicolaou (13:41.867)
Yeah.

Barry Nicolaou (13:47.225)
Okay. Okay, cool. Really, really cool question, Sue. And you know, actually, you've gone right to the crux of why of how people change and how people don't. So the first thing I want to say is that your conscious mind will take the stronger of two beliefs. If you say with your with your with your with your mouth and with your body and you say, I want this, but secretly, you believe you will not get it.

That secret belief is the stronger emotion. The subconscious mind will say, I hear you, but I don't believe you. I'm gonna show you more of what you really believe. And until what we say and what we mean are at parity, then we will not actually achieve because we've got this duality in us that is consistently at odds with each other. And we don't pay this a lot of attention and it is like the engine of your mind, right?

So you look at it and you go, so from now on, I'm gonna make a decision. What I say and what I mean are gonna be the same thing. And that's not meaning I'm gonna be rude, but that means that I'm gonna be true to me. The believers who understand will join. The skeptics who think that I've changed will leave. And maybe that's not a bad thing because you start shifting direction because it's very important for you to do that.

It's more important for you to do that than to keep the status quo. So as far as practical tips, it's the first one you've got to say what you mean and mean what you say. And that's not a cliche. It's something that you've got to really become in tune with. So if you want to pursue a different career, if you want to look at healing from a disease, if you want to attract a life partner or whatever it is, you've got to actually, the subconscious mind has to be at a situation where

it believes what you're saying with your mouth. And the only way for that to happen is for those words to be congruent with the belief that it's coming from. So I am a certain way, this is who I am, and I'm speaking from love. And if that doesn't come across that way, that's okay. Because I know I'm being truthful, and I'm being honest, and I'm being loved by who I am, and it's taken me a lot of time to get here. And if we can just embrace that, then all of a sudden,

Barry Nicolaou (16:08.269)
the scenarios that coming to life match that vibration and we end up attracting the life that we want. And we're not 80 years old living with regret. We're 80 years old going, I spoke my truth, I lived my truth, probably upset a few people, probably made a lot of other people happy. And I hope that my life becomes a beacon for other people to speak their truth. And for that to happen, I've got to be able to speak mine.

And that might mean upsetting some things and that might mean changing your life around that might mean finding a new relationship, changing your diet. It might mean a lot of things. But you get to a point where you stop lying to yourself. If you can get to that point, you'll actually have be the closest to free that you'll ever be like you'll actually you're finally you're finally you and that's a beautiful place to live and then you attract

that new you, rather than living in a place of duality that tries to keep your world consistently happy with who you are and how you fit in to different people's lives. I'm not sure if that's actually answered your question, Sue.

Sue (17:23.374)
It has. Yeah, no, it has. And you know, this is interesting, this idea of finally being you. It's kind of like we're conflicting so often ourselves, right? Like we want something, but there's this internal fear that we're not going to get it or not have it. But at the same token, we're not living in our own authenticity of what we really want and what we really want to manifest.

Barry Nicolaou (17:47.157)
We're not exactly right. And I think, I think the point, the tipping point, if you want to call it that comes from a frustration point of giving so much of who you're not.

And finally saying yes to who you are. That's a tipping point that most of us are flirting at 48%, 47%, it's not enough to tip us over. Some of us that head to 50 are on the tipping point. 51% could be listening to this podcast, reading a great book, having a mentor, a coach or whatever it is. That's the tipping point that takes you. When you're at 51 to 52%, the frustration for not changing is more than the frustration for changing.

and you just tend to choose a different hard, you know, you we've heard this analogy a million times, you know, you choose your hard, do you want to live the life that you are currently living? And if you're happy with that life, that's awesome, don't change. But if you kind of are in a place of frustration where you want things to change, well, that's a different kind of hard, you're going to have different surprises on that road. But maybe that's worth the change. Because if you want to explore new ground, and if you want to finally be the person that you've longed to be.

then yeah, there's gonna be some changes made and those changes will be uncomfortable. But is the reward worth the effort? Most people would say yes. People that have made that shift because you'll never regret becoming the truest version of you. That will never be a regret for you. It might be a regret in the short term on your journey towards that. But when you reach and when you...

when you are at that place where you're happy with who you are, wow, like, it's such a euphoric feeling because you've given yourself personal choice in freedom and you've taken it. You haven't just looked at it as an idea, you've actually embraced it. And it's a beautiful place to be. Really, really beautiful. You don't necessarily keep everything the same as it used to be.

Barry Nicolaou (19:53.133)
But I don't think life's meant to be like that. You look at the seasons change and you look at the weathers and you look at, nothing stays the same, every day is different, right? Yet we are, I heard this lovely saying the other day, God is more interested in your growth than he is with your comfort.

Sue (20:10.942)
Mm-hmm.

Barry Nicolaou (20:12.805)
And sometimes growth is damn painful. And sometimes growth is uncomfortable. And sometimes growth sucks. And you know what's interesting, sir, it's a place in me that I've struggled with for the longest time. And the books were a way for me to grapple with that and to get my thoughts down of how this can happen. And if it's happening for me inside me, it's damn sure happening for other people.

So you get to a place in your life where you, you're trying to teach what you're trying to learn at the same time, because no one knows it all, right? We're all kind of grappling with understanding it. And no person's journey is the same. I keep saying to my friends and colleagues, you know, like there's not one reality. There are 8 billion versions of reality playing out all at the same time. There are 8 billion people in the world. So it's kind of like everyone's got their own version of reality that they believe is right.

So there are laws within that specific reality that you can adhere to, or you can just say, okay, well, I'm going to do my own thing. So it's very, you get to a point where you kind of start to make some wholesome decisions about you and it's, it's daunting, but it's liberating at the same time. Yeah.

Sue (21:28.234)
Wow, I love that. That is so insightful. Now tell us, Barry, you know, this idea of thoughts becoming things and then reprogramming the subconscious mind. So is a strategy to that like positive affirmations? I mean, will that help reprogram the subconscious mind visualizations?

Barry Nicolaou (21:37.933)
I can't.

Barry Nicolaou (21:44.962)
Yes.

Yes.

So just to give you an idea, I believe in affirmations, but first you've got to clarify your intent. The new book, Move the Mountain, it's all about resetting intention. And there's no point doing affirmations. And I'm a huge fan of Louise Hayes and Hay House and a lot of the authors. And actually Wayne Dyer was the catalyst for me to get into this line of work because I listened to his voice. I fell in love with the man. I wish I met him, Sue, when he came to Australia. Such a brilliant man.

But you got to get to a point where you understand that there is a strategy. And if you have a pen, pattern pen, I can give you what that is now. Right. The first thing you got to do is identify what you want. A lot of people don't, would you believe they identify what they don't want? I don't want to be broke. I don't want cancer. I don't want to be divorced. I don't want, that's not the same thing. I want, I want you to tell me what you're for, not what you're against.

and people always will get what they're for, right? So identify what you want with laser. You've got to get laser specific. Barry, I want this. There it is, I can pinpoint it. The second area is to understand that that's a truism in the world for someone. So to get to a point where you've understood that, hey, let's just say economic freedom. I want, I don't know, a million dollars a year coming in or some fanciful figure, right?

Barry Nicolaou (23:15.545)
I want to meet other people in the world right now earning that. Yeah. Other people in the world that have had my struggles. Yeah. Other people in the world that have had the doubt that I've had in getting there. Yep. And you start to realize that the journey that you're on is not by yourself. It's actually other people are actually living a very, very similar scenario. So that's the second step. So understand that it's real for someone else. If it's real for them, it become, it can become real for you. The third area is to feel the feeling.

I want you to go in your bones at night, meditate in the morning, meditate in the evening, and actually feel it as real now. And the way you do this and understand this is to close your eyes and meditate and whatever you want to, it's real in your life now, just where would you go? What would you be doing? Who would you be helping now that this is a truism for you? How will your life change? Can you employ someone to help you on social media? Can you do this? Like how will your life be different? Like go through the hole.

the whole kit and go, this is going to be so cool. I'll be living there. I'll be helping that person and understand that this is actually a truism now. And the cool thing is this, the subconscious mind cannot make the distinction between a real event and a imagined event felt vividly. It doesn't know the distinction. And the other part of the subconscious mind is to show you your beliefs.

It has to show you the physical representation of what you believe to be true. So if you keep planting seeds of, yeah, this is true. So it's no biggie. People in the world, there's a lot of money in the world. So it's not like it's rare. It's a lot of people that are earning this sort of money. So that's not like that's impossible. So what's the big deal? Where is my hold up? Is it my friends? Is it my family? Is it personal beliefs? Where is it? I want to know where the blockages are, because I need to.

shoot some water down that pipe, I need to clear it out, I need to know where it's going and you start to realise that this is a truism, this can become real for you, right, if you really want it to. The fourth area is to release toxicity and doubt, which is huge, because if you do the first three steps well and you leave toxicity at its current levels, you're treading water, you're not moving anywhere. So you've got to look at nutrition, sleep,

Barry Nicolaou (25:35.749)
family dynamics, friendship dynamics, what you do for a living. And you ask yourself, is any of this hampering me consciously, or perhaps unconsciously? Like is any like take a health check of your toxicity and go, can I limit some I might not be able to cut all of it out. But I can cut some. And even if you bring it down from 100% to 60, you've cut a lot out.

So all of a sudden you're gonna get better at identifying future toxicity in friends, family, food, sleep, you're gonna get better at identifying it. And then what will happen and you'll make different choices. And that's super cool because those choices will align with who you are, okay? Who you now are. That's the fourth area, toxicity and doubt. Get super specific about what that means for you. Now the fifth area is really, really exciting. You gotta be able to release the timing. And a lot of people struggle with that.

But I'm a big believer in life giving you what you need at the time when you can embrace it fully.

Just let that sink in, right? Because what we want in this world is we want everything now. Because we believe we're ready for it. And you know what? If you haven't got it, you're not. And that's not me being facetious or me being upset or me being angry. It's just coming to a situation with my own life as well. I want certain things and I'm not receiving them. I know I'm not ready to receive them. It's like going into nature and try forcing a flower to open. We'll try.

Go and force a flower or a bud to open and start screaming at the bud going, you still a little flower, you're not gonna open, you're never gonna open, you're a horrible little thing. You're a, and you know that eventually the sun will come out and flowers are receptive to that warmth and all of a sudden as they feel the sun come out, they tend to open, right? Because it's timing. You look at the waves at the beach and you start arguing with the ocean. Now I want those waves to come in at different time because I'm a surfer and I want them to come in. No.

Barry Nicolaou (27:37.025)
The rhythmic balance of the earth knows when those waves need to come in. And you've got to surf with that rhythmic balance. Surfers understand that. So you get to a stage where you walk, you work towards what you want, but there's a sense of allowing that has to come into play. I keep saying to my clients, life is a tight rope between making things happen and allowing it to take place for you. So work towards what you want.

but also know that there's a timing of life that you're not privy to. We only have the ground view. Unfortunately, there's an aerial view of life. Just like those of us that are parents, we know for a four and five and I've got two girls under six years old as a parent. I know when the best time is to give them sugar. It's not before they go to bed. It's when I know they're going to burn it during the day. A five year old would not understand that, but her dad does.

her parents know her mom knows right. So we play specific roles, even though the kids do not understand why they cannot have a sugar cookie at nine o'clock or eight o'clock at night that the parents know. So just use the same analogy for the parents out there use the same analogy, just go okay, there is something I do not know, but I want the cookie. And I know that it's no big deal. But if it's not coming yet, there's a reason for that. I actually trust that reason.

I trust that reason and the more you trust, the more it will be given to you. I mean, my six year old doesn't say that to me. I trust you daddy, but you know what you're doing. She just cries and she gets upset and she gets angry and she fights with me. Right. And, um, apart from me explaining it to her in the best possible way for a six year old to understand, um, tantrums always ensue. I always end up being the bad parent. Um, but maybe that's how

higher power feels with us. Maybe we're the ones that are angry saying it's not happening for me, you must hate me. No, I love you. I actually love you so much that I'm helping you but you don't know that I am. And there's a lot of behind the scenes work that is going on. Just like in a family for that child to grow. There's swimming lessons, there's jobs, there's scenarios that are being paid for in the background that the kids are not privy to. There's a lot of goings on that the kids don't know about. They trust.

Barry Nicolaou (30:01.421)
that you know what you're doing, mom and dad, that you know, we have to have as adults, we're just big kids, we have to have that same trust. If we do Sue, wow, life unfolds in the most perfect way for you. And for me specifically, and for the next person specifically, life is saying trust me that I know what I'm doing. Where we get into problems is when we get in.

get in our own way and we start to force things through. And some people will have success setting goals, forcing things through. But what I find it's temporary success. It's not permanent, it's not lasting success. It's, you've got to keep fighting and struggling and fighting and struggling. And then you'll have some success in that and fighting and struggling. And for those types of people, life ends up being one big fight, one big struggle. And they'll say to you, well Barry life is one big struggle, don't you know? And I'm like, no.

actually, I'm allowing things to take place as well, because I trust that there's a timing of things. And yeah, if I get to the end of my life and things haven't been done, okay. And if I get to the end of my life, and I look at things have been done, okay, there's a plan. And I guess the hardest thing for me is being able to trust that plan. But you know, when you look back with hindsight, Sue, and you go, now I get why that happened. Like, why don't we why don't we take that for the rest of our lives? Why don't why don't we take that philosophy on as a

as a mandate of how we are and how we feel about ourselves. Why don't we trust the process? Why do we so often hinder that? Like why do we block that? And when we do that, I feel life takes us on the long route around to our dreams, rather than the direct. Spoken your ear.

Sue (31:53.972)
Oh, I love that. That was so beautiful. And I think that whole trust and intuitive kind of awareness component is so obviously such a critical part of manifestation, right? And then setting that intention and believing, allowing, it's that hope element almost right.

Barry Nicolaou (32:10.44)
Mm.

Barry Nicolaou (32:14.057)
Mm hmm. Absolutely. And I guess, just to kind of, sorry, I'm talking so much, but it's really important to get this out as well for people to hear this. If you ever have trouble understanding how your thoughts become reality, this is the best analogy to use, right? So I need you to consider the soil in your backyard or front yard, or just go to a park and just kind of dig up a bit of grass and look at the soil underneath and ask the soil a question. What are you like?

And the soil only has one answer. The soil says, I nurture expansion. And you say, well, that's a pretty simplistic answer. What the hell does that mean? You say, well, whatever you plant in me, I will grow. You can plant poison ivy, you can plant roses, you can put grass, you can put weeds. And I will grow that for you. Do you know why, Barry? Because you know what you're doing. I hope.

And I think that you know what you're doing because I nurture expansion. Now, take the soil and pretend that is your subconscious mind. You plant seeds. We see the manifestation of those plants in five years time, 10 years time. And we're quite perplexed at this ugly plant that we've grown. And you say to yourself, why am I that stupid? How could I make a mistake like that? Like, why am I thinking down this way? And the subconscious mind will say to you,

because I nurture expansion. And you've planted a seed that you weren't consciously aware of, or you were consciously aware of, and you just let it grow. Like anger manifests into disease, right? Prolonged depression manifests into anger, and anger manifests into illness. And then you think to yourself, why am I not well? Well, if you look back in the last 20 to 30 or 40 years, was there a point where you...

you harbored these ill feelings and didn't let things go, was there a point in that? And yes, that has manifested into something. So the garden's the best analogy. The soil does not care. The soil will not question you. The soil will not put you in a corner and say, well, Barry, listen, I know you've just put that in me to grow, but maybe you wanna think about what plant that is. No, it's not gonna say that. It's just gonna go, okay, let's make this happen. So what you've got.

Barry Nicolaou (34:34.04)
is you've got 8 billion souls planting seeds. Those seeds are influenced by the news, by life, by social media, by our friends, by our family, by the books, by the podcast, by the food we eat, the whole lot, right? And the subcontrast mind is saying, okay, I'm going to grow that for you. And we end up sometimes with beautiful plants, beautiful, like people have beautiful scenarios, beautiful lives. And sometimes we end up with things that we don't want. But

the one thing that I've really learned and this is what the second book ferrets out, we are the gardeners. Like, like, I know some of us might believe in God and some of us might not, and I believe. We are of God, like we are of divine lineage, like that is our lineage. And if God created the world from nothing, then our 70 to 80 years on this earth is how we demonstrate that lineage by creating the life that we want for ourselves.

by creating them from thought. And that's what's beautiful about the creator. And that's what's beautiful about life is like, I'm gonna give you this opportunity to show you what it's like in my mind. If you can beat this training ground, then there might be bigger things for you. But we gotta get to a stage where we get past thinking about fear.

and earthly possessions and money and this scenario that everything's limited and those wars and there's this and there's that. It's just humanity at a very young level where we haven't understood these greater concepts. And you know what God's saying? He's sitting back and He's saying this is how they learn. This is how they learn. Like I'm saying to Grace, my little girl, my little six-year-old with the sugar cookie, this is how she learns. God is saying

This is how they learn. They've got to kill each other for the next thousand years to realize that life is precious. This is how they learn. And it's sad, but at the same time, if he intervened consistently, we wouldn't learn off our own accord. We would just, we'd cheat with kind of, I don't know if that makes any sense, but there has to be an organic growth within the human being to be able to get to enlightenment and to understand greater concepts of love.

Barry Nicolaou (36:52.397)
But if we're not understanding it, then we have to go through that infancy stage, growing up through kids and then through puberty and through adolescence and then through becoming your 20s and 30s and 40s. And then you start to learn different things along those timelines, right? And God gives you these lessons to go, okay, Barry will now get it, he's 45. Now he'll get this, let's just give him that. All of a sudden the second book comes out. Oh, Barry, he's 50 now, now he'll get this, give him that, and something else happens. And that...

natural unfolding flower that's opening, that's natural unfolding way of life ends up being beautiful to watch because we get to the end of our lives and we look back at the youth and yeah we want to help them but at the same time we realize that it's a process for them to learn to teach themselves and we're here for that. But it's a beautiful existence if you look at it in one aspect and in another aspect if you look at it through human eyes it ends up being a struggle.

But it's, I don't think it was intended to be viewed as a struggle. I think it was intended to be viewed as a beautiful, unfolding, trusting process that brings us closer to love.

Yeah.

Sue (38:10.054)
Mm-hmm. Oh, I love that. That is so beautiful, Barry. Wow. So many amazing insights here. So a couple of things first and foremost, I just want to thank you so much for your time today. You've been so amazing. You've offered so many incredible insights, takeaways, wisdom, and I'm so honored to have had this time with you. Thank you so much.

Barry Nicolaou (38:31.949)
Thank you, sir. And thank you for having me. And please continue this impactful work you're doing. It's so beautiful.

Sue (38:38.134)
Thank you so much, Barry. Now in closing, if there were just one message, your hope for everybody, what is that closing message you want to leave us with?

Barry Nicolaou (38:46.029)
Listen, just in short, just identify the next right move for you. Don't look at the whole, oh, that's so big. I've got to manifest this whole lot. Look at that direction. What would the next right move look like in that direction? And just consider a wall. It's just brick on a brick on a brick. Lay this brick as perfectly as you can lay it. Lay the next brick as perfectly as you can lay it. Before you know it, you've got your wall. But don't look at the wall.

Just look at laying, like look at today and how can I be the best that I can today? Keep my nutrition, keep my sleeping habits, look at toxicity, that list that I was talking about earlier, keep those in check as much as possible, lay that brick as perfectly as it can be laid. And all of a sudden, before you know it, one day turns into 30, 30 turns into 60 and your life starts manifesting.

Sue (39:41.426)
Mm, that is such a beautiful closing message. You've been so wonderful, Barry. Thank you so much. Thank you.

Barry Nicolaou (39:47.221)
Thank you Sue. Take care.