THEATER 194: The Mush

Elena (she/her) meets up with her daughter Rox (they/them) a day late, to help Rox pack up their apartment after graduation from college with her Master’s degree. As they go through the piles of things to pack or discard the conversation between them delves into unresolved mother-child issues.

Bernadette Armstrong directs a cast that includes Julia Sanford as Elena and Christine Uhebe as Roxs.

Chance Lang is the playwright. New York City born, and Los Angeles raised, Chance is a Writer/Director known for his original works Going Home (2025), Trying (2023), One Take (2021), and Hypocrite (2019), and has collaborated internationally with The Useless Room at Institute Grotowski in Wroclaw and Brzezinka, Poland (2018), and WITKACY/Two Headed Calf at the Divine Comedy Festival in Krakow, Poland, TEATR Studio Warsaw, and REDCAT in Los Angeles. 

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:05

Hello, and welcome to Open Door Playhouse, a theater podcast that celebrates live theater on the podcast stage. I'm Larry Coleman. At the Open Door Playhouse, we strive to bring our listeners thoughtful and surprising 10 minutes and one-act plays that showcase insightful and new perspectives of the world we share with others. Open Door Playhouse is a 501 and C3 theater organization. Support for Open Door Playhouse comes from listeners like you. Your tax-deductible donations help keep our plays on the podcast stage. Now playing in Theater 194, The Mush. Written by Chance Lane, directed by Bernadette Armstrong, starring Christine Wheaty as Rox, and Julia Sanford as Alina.

SPEAKER_03 0:58

Oh, you have to move. Find another parking place. People are honking. Oh, let them honk. Oh, they are. Oh, that that's for you. Right, because I'm the only person in the entire world doing wrong. Just turn the wheel. I think I'm too far back. Just start backing up. Yeah. Yeah, turn. Turn the wheel. Turn the wheel more. More. More more. I'm turning. I can see you. You can turn more. Just turn the wheel. I had you far too young. Turn the wheel. Fine. Okay, good. Okay, okay. Stop. Stop. Fuck. Fuck. I said stop. Did I bump him? Bump him? You fucking nail him. I mean, the car's got a fucking camera. It beeps at you if you get too close. It beeps louder when you're really close. I mean, did you not hear it? Can I just straighten out with all the Fs? I mean, can you just stop with all the F's? Alright. Fine. Alright. You're good there. I want to be closer. Nope, you're fine. You're fine. Why not be a little better? Just fucking fine. Watch the F. You know what? Do whatever the fuck you want. You don't listen anyway, you're allergic. That's not true. I just like things a certain way. Yeah, your way. And every other way is wrong and punishable by death. Oh my god, you're so dramatic. Just park the car. What do you think I'm doing? I'm hanging up. Wait, no, I'll be right there. Exactly. Well, wait, just I'm almost Okay. Okay, get the door. It's open. The door? Yeah. Well, you don't want it open all the time.

SPEAKER_02 2:37

Someone might come in.

SPEAKER_03 2:39

Nobody's coming in.

SPEAKER_02 2:40

Well, you don't know that. That's why you lock the door.

SPEAKER_03 2:43

I do.

SPEAKER_02 2:44

You just said you left it open.

SPEAKER_03 2:46

Not all the time.

SPEAKER_02 2:47

Well, you didn't say that.

SPEAKER_03 2:49

I'm hanging up.

SPEAKER_02 2:50

Wait.

SPEAKER_03 2:52

Why? Wait, what are you doing?

SPEAKER_02 2:54

I'm writing a note. I hit them.

SPEAKER_03 2:58

Mom, I'm hanging up. Shit. Hey. Hey. How are you, sweetie? Fine. Oh, my perfect precious angel. Ugh, stop it. What? What? The mush. What's wrong with a little mush? I don't want it. Oh, let me be mushy. Stop! Mushy, mushy, mushy. Stop! Fine. Geez. Be like your father. You look like him enough. You're late. So? By a whole day. No. You were supposed to be here yesterday. I thought it was today. Bullshit. I did. And I thought you loved me, but fucking whoops. There was an accident. People were in danger. A car was on fire. What do I do? Speed around and say, sorry, my daughter needs me. You don't matter. Even if you were in traffic for an entire day, you could have called. You had so much time to call. I did. We spoke while I was parking. You know one. I don't even care. Let's just pack. Can we just pack? Yeah, that's why I'm here. Then let's pack. Well, first, hi. It's nice to see you. Yeah, I think it's just it's I think I'd rather pack. God, I'm sorry I was late. You're always late. No. Not true. Are you actually fucking kidding me right now? Can you please stop with the F's? You've been late to everything my entire life. That's not true. Yes, it is. Name one thing. Birthdays. Vague. My graduation. The funeral. You were late to your own mom's funeral. I had to get the ashes because you couldn't find the address. I had to give them to you. Okay. I get it. Okay? I get it. Do you get it? Or are you just saying that so I shut up? Maybe I get it, and you should shut up. What do you think about that? Love you too, Mom. Sorry. I'm so mean sometimes. So did you sprinkle her all over LA? No. I was going to yesterday, but didn't happen. Where is she? Still in the car? So you've just been driving with her? And I've been driving a lot more since. Mom, you gotta get rid of that. I will. I really mean this. And I'm glad you care about me. You gotta let her go. And you gotta give me a break. I was late, okay? I'm sorry. I'm here now and I'm doing my best. It's not so easy for me to let go of my mom. And I wish it wasn't so easy for you. So you want help or not? Mom, you've been driving with grandma in a jar next to you for months. I don't know if that's good for you. You you gotta i it's not even what she wanted. Well, what about having her above the mantle? People do that. Is that bad for me? Well, a personal opinion, but I don't think it's good. I think it's yeah. I don't think it's good. So what are we doing? What are we doing here?

SPEAKER_02 6:38

Packing? I thought we were moving. Did you pack at all? I mean, how are all these piles yours? Where did anyone else even put anything?

SPEAKER_03 6:50

Or did you do this so I'd have to clean up after you again? I mean you could have tried to do something. Did you just do anything or did you just sit on your ass? Ah, I'm so glad you asked. As you can tell by all my hard work, I sat on my ass like the worthless piece of shit I am. Jesus Christ, I didn't say that. You're so dramatic. Well, so are you. And maybe it's because yesterday all the other girls' moms came over and helped them pack. Even though we got our masters, we are just girls packing with our moms. And it was a it was a big packing party. And we all had so much fun packing. The going back home after college, part two, packing party, and my mom was the only one not there. So forgive me if I want to know why you didn't call and we're a whole day late. Because it fucking sucked. Why do you want my help? You've hated everything I've ever given you for five years. Not everything feels like me anymore. But then why do you want my help? How am I supposed to know? I just want help.

SPEAKER_02 8:05

Well, where do we start?

SPEAKER_03 8:08

I don't care.

SPEAKER_02 8:10

What about here? Here? Yeah. With this pile. Sure.

SPEAKER_03 8:18

Well, do you want this shirt? I guess. Well, what's that mean? I guess. Do you want it or not? Yeah. But do you really? Yeah. So we're keeping it? Sure. Just say yes or no. Yes. Great. Done. This is gonna take all day. And whose fault is that? Would have been fine if we started yesterday. Can we just get on with it? Yeah. What about this? No. This? No. No? No. I love this. Well, you keep it. No. Fine. It's fine. They're mine. Not yours. I know. Just making sure. God, I never I don't have to do this. I can drive home. Mom, please. Do you really want help moving or not? Yeah. Then stop being a fucking shit. Okay. Sorry. Forgiven. Now, do you want this? Yes. This? Um yes. Good. No. Good. No. Even better. Yes. Of course. Obviously. This? No. No? Yeah. Really? Well then no. No. They're yours. No, I'll keep it. No, it's just You got that on our road trip. I know, I just I think it's a little girly. Well, what's wrong with being a little girly? Nothing. It's I just don't think I want to do that anymore. What? Be girly? Well, not like that. What's like that? A girly girl, you know? Bruffles and all. Ever? I don't know, maybe. Well, wow. What do you want to be? How do you want to dress? A little more like I am now? Like a boy with no ambition? I'm kidding. That was a joke. You're supposed to laugh. Okay. Oh god, give me a break. Please don't be so sensitive. No, that was fucking mean. And don't say, don't say fuck. I was trying to be funny. Well, it wasn't. And you're not funny. I'm funny. Nope, you're not. Well, I'm your mother, so take a joke. I like clothes that are loose. Nothing tight. Fine, hide. Not my body. I hate you. That was rude. And I wish you weren't my mom. Okay, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, okay? I drove here because you asked me. I know. I know. You know, I don't have to fucking take this. I know. Thank you. Are you? Are you thankful? Yes, I am. Then you should fucking show it. I am. I'm sorry. I just Just what? Guilty? Because you mistreat your mother? Then you should change. Oh my god! I mean, why do you do this? Because I'm depressed. Fuck. Okay, I'm fucking sad. I'm fucking sad. I'm confused. I don't feel right my skin and I want escape, but I can't, because there is no escape. But that's not right. It can't be right. And I don't know if this body's not right or if I'm just uncomfortable in my skin because of my pain. Because something is not right. And why couldn't I be born right? But I I can't think like that because that's not true. I'm perfect. I gotta be, and I gotta think like that because it's true. I'm perfect. I just don't know what I am yet. Fuck. And yes, loose clothes, help. Why are you depressed? I I don't know. No. Why? I don't know. Well, why do you think? I don't know. Well, how do you know you're depressed? I am, and I just want some fucking support. I'm right here. No, you're not. You're late my whole fucking day, and everything I do is wrong, and I just wanted to be there. I'm right here.

SPEAKER_02 13:03

I'm here now, okay? And I love you. I love you. More than anything. More than anything that's ever existed. Rox, I would die for you.

SPEAKER_03 13:19

Even if it meant you got one more minute, I would die smiling, knowing I give you at least one more minute. Because my heart breaks for you. I mean, you're my one and only baby, and I want to protect you and squeeze you and bother you and piss you off, and no matter what, I love you. You're mad. I'll fucking take it. Just don't shut me out. Just tell me what's going on and let me be better. I'll be better, I promise. I don't want to be girly anymore. Then don't. Fuck girly. Fuck girly girls. Fuck 'em. Well, that's not what I'm trying to do. And you are so much more than what you wear. Thanks, Mom. And if chip eating, soda drinking, pizza flipping, washed-up gamer bro who thinks she's a stud with a twin bed on the floor next to a shirt filled with dried cum is your aesthetic. You gross and fucking rocket. That's actually disgusting. The point is, girly or not, you're still my daughter. No matter what. Well, can I be your child? Yeah. Of course. You are. No, like when you refer to me or introduce me to people. Call you my child? Like, this is my child? Yeah. It's a little odd, don't you think? I mean, you're my daughter. Well, I don't want to be. You're still my mom. I I I don't want any other mom. Sure. But I'm not your daughter. I'm your child. So I'm supposed to say this is my child, she They. They. This is my child. They are Rocks. But it's just you. Mom, this is not new. I know. And we've talked about it. I know. Then sound like it. Can I call you Roxanne? No, because my name is Rocks. So are we throwing away all your dresses? Well, no. All your heels? I already did. What? I I never wanted to wear them. But sometimes you have to. When? Weddings? Funerals? Why? Respect. And you do a big boxy heel. It's the only way. To who? To who are we respecting? Mom's funeral wasn't about you, Rox. If it's not about me and you're late, and grandma's dead, then who the fuck's it about? If this is about respect respectfully, why the fuck would I wear anything that isn't me respecting me? I mean, I just want to be me. I want to learn about what that is and be it. And I'm never gonna be me if I don't respect myself or wear what respects me. What about once in a blue moon, just doing what your mom asks of you? If it disrespects me, then no. Why? Why should I have to do what your mom wanted you to do? Why do I have to do what you want me to do? Why can't I just do what I want? Because you listened to your mother. Is that what grandma said to you? You weren't there. You don't know. I never said I did. I could never just do what I wanted. Why not? I had to listen to my mother. You do not do what mother says you cannot do. Well, I think that's fucked up. And I hate grandma. Because I I always thought she never let you be yourself. And when you were, you were amazing. Mom, this is harsh, but she's dead. Live your life. Sprinkle her ashes all over LA and live your life. It's not too late.

SPEAKER_02 17:30

I'm so sorry I was late.

SPEAKER_03 17:33

It's okay.

SPEAKER_02 17:34

It's not.

SPEAKER_03 17:36

You know why I didn't come? I wanted to, but I wanted to do the ashes. I really needed to do it. I need to get this done. I've had them too long and it was time. But I couldn't do it. I couldn't even put my hand in the fucking jar. The idea of touching ash, a pile of ash, and that's supposed to be her? Honestly, I could throw up.

SPEAKER_02 18:05

But I thought if I just keep driving, I'll drive enough to be brave enough or bored enough to do it.

SPEAKER_03 18:13

To try. But I just keep driving and I just can't do it. Because I don't understand me without her. Cause you're right. She never let me be me. I don't know who me is either. Who the fuck am I? All I know is I'm my mother's daughter, but without mom, that's why I can't let her go. And after realizing that, I couldn't join the packing party. I didn't want to be anywhere. And I couldn't call because I. When you were confused and didn't know what to do, I told you what I was told to do, because it was all I knew. And it would make me fucking furious that you wouldn't do it or that it didn't work. Because I didn't know what else to do. I was useless. And of course you don't have to do anything you don't want to do, but I did. I still do. All the time. I mean, I don't want to have to wear heels, but nobody ever wanted me to be me. And you not being girling makes me scared, because if you don't want to be me, then I can't help you. And if I can't help you, why am I here?

SPEAKER_04 19:34

What do I do without my mom? I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I I don't want to cry. I don't. God, this makes me so angry. Because I want you to figure out you, and I'm sorry. I only know how to get in the way. I'm just doing what I was taught.

SPEAKER_03 19:59

Mom, you may not be feeling all the feels you're feeling right now, but please know that this is this is one of the happiest days of my life. And I love you, Mom. And you're an amazing mom. And I'm I'm gonna remember this day forever. Oh, stop it. I'm serious. Well, good. I'm glad you got something. Can we keep packing? Yeah. What's next? Well, do you want anything? Hmm. Thank you. Um I might be okay, but I guess if there's anything you don't want that's hard for me to say goodbye to, maybe I'll take it and figure it out. Just don't keep it in the car. Very funny. That was funny. Thank you. Thank you. And I won't. I'm gonna do that, I promise. In saying it, I want to know who I am too. So thank you. Yay! Well, thank you. And I'm keeping this. Obviously. Obviously, but this has to go. Obviously. Obviously. Keep. Keep. Toss. Keep, keep, and keep. Toss. Oh yes. Say it with me. Keep. This with this though? Cute, right? But strong. Not girly cute, just confident cute. These two together? And stuffed like this? Yeah. This is probably as girly as I like to be. Oh. Well yay! Well we got range. Yeah, I'm not gonna like start wearing a suit like it's supposed to. I'm I'm still just gonna wear parts of it the wrong way. Right. Totally. I love it. You know that was funny. Two for two.

SPEAKER_02 22:12

And I love you.

SPEAKER_03 22:15

And I will mush all over you if it's the last thing I do. Even if you hate it. Mushy mushy. Stop it. Mushy mushy mushy mush. I love you too.

SPEAKER_01 22:27

In my daughters I am a hero. I am strong and wise and unf but the truth is plain to see. She was sent to the rescue me. I see who I wanna be in my daughter.

SPEAKER_00 23:07

Our plays are produced by Bernadette Armstrong, recorded at the Oak House Studios in Altadena, California, and mixed by our talented sound engineer, David Peters. Sound effects and music is downloaded from Audio Jungle and Karaoke version. If you are interested in submitting a play for production, you can find the information on our website at opendoorplayhouse.org. Please share this podcast with friends and do not forget to subscribe so you will be notified when our next production goes live on the podcast.