TCMMY - Don’t Be Caged By Your Age And Beat Ageism - Master Podcaster Ande Lyons

“Explain your business like you’re telling your grandmother.” That line sounds polite, but it carries a punch of ageism and it’s one of the moments that pushed today’s guest, Ande Lyons, from the startup world into a loud, proud pro-aging mission. We start with a quick, fun run through Boston life and sports loyalty, then move into the bigger story: what happens when smart, experienced people get treated as “past their prime” in rooms that claim to value innovation.

Ande breaks down how her viral “Don’t Be Caged By Your Age” post opened the floodgates, with comments that were both inspiring and heartbreaking. We talk about representation, thriving after 65, and why the older generation is not “tech challenged” but often the group that lived through the most dramatic technology shifts of our lifetime. We also get blunt about anti-aging marketing, especially the way it targets women, selling fear and shame instead of health and self-respect.

From there, we zoom out to purpose and connection. We dig into why community and intergenerational friendships matter so much for longevity, why retirement can become a dangerous kind of disconnection, and how staying engaged keeps your mind and identity strong. Finally, Ande shares how she built a real-world podcaster meetup and an online community, plus practical advice for new podcasters and anyone stuck on a plateau who’s tempted to quit.

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Transcript

Welcome And How To Join Live

SPEAKER_00 1:10

Welcome back to the flagship. They call me Mr. You, the podcast. Of course, I'm your host, Mr. You. If you're watching for the very first time, thanks again for making us part of your week, wherever you are and however you're listening. We're live on LinkedIn and Facebook and of course our YouTube channel, youtube.com at the Call Me Mr. You. If you'd like to support us, by all means, you can do it by hitting the follow, subscribe buttons out there. Helps us out a whole lot. Thank you. For those that are not used to our format, on this show, out of all of our four shows, is the only show we can talk about anything with there's no real format. So we can go anywhere, which makes it so much fun. But if you have a question for us or a comment or something you want us to answer on the air, drop it in the comment section or in the chat where you're watching the episode today. We're happy to answer those as long as they're relevant to what we're talking about. If it's crazy and off topic, not going out there. Our guest today is the four-time founder, former global startup mentor, serial podcast, and live stream host, and the host of Don't Be Caged by Your Age, interview style podcast, helping folks thrive after 65. I love it. And the line is with us.

SPEAKER_02 2:17

Oh my gosh, I'm so happy to be. I'm so happy to be here with you, Mr. U and all your wonderful folks who tune in. So delighted. Waving from Boston and cheering wildly.

SPEAKER_00 2:29

I love it. I love it. So let's just talk about Boston just a tiny tiny bit. I'm from New York, so we're going to keep it simple. But how are things going in Boston? How are things out there in your neck of the woods?

SPEAKER_02 2:41

You know, we're safe. That's one thing I want to say.

Boston Sports And Celtics Loyalty

SPEAKER_02 2:43

We are safe. We are, of course, rebel rousers here and totally devoted to our sports teams. I just came back from a trip to California, and every hotel or place that we stayed always asked us about a the Patriots and the Red Sox. And I said, don't forget the Celtics and the Bruins. Yeah, we've got a lot going on here in New England with our sports teams.

SPEAKER_00 3:05

I know you do. I know you do. Out of out of all of those, and you're probably going to pick the one I think you're probably going to pick out of recency bias, but out of all of those teams, which is the one that's like is a special place in your heart that the other one just can't feel.

SPEAKER_02 3:18

Always the Celtics. Always.

unknown 3:21

Why?

SPEAKER_02 3:21

Well, first of all, I love basketball. And secondly, you know, we've watched, I've been going watching them since I was 15. Heavily involved. And you know, sky boxes, entertaining clients, doing all the things at Boston Garden. And it just, we've had so many, you know, great players over the years. And I will always be a Celtic scout at heart. Doesn't mean you know, I don't have a huge warm place in my heart for the Red Sox, of course, especially with the challenges they've had for what, a hundred years now. But they're they're doing well. And I love hockey. I love the Bruins and all that. But the Celtics will always have a place in my heart.

SPEAKER_00 4:07

Every time I hear the wrestler, I always think about Nomar. Nobody talks about him anymore. He was one of the wrestlers that I knew the most. I know other ones. I know sports though, but Nomar. I miss him. All right.

SPEAKER_02 4:18

So and of course, the Patriots is where people always land. So I, you know, I'm like, yes, okay, football, okay. Yes, we've we've done our share of amazing games, but I still have to go back to basketball, my first love.

SPEAKER_00 4:32

I only have one more question about that. I think you're the perfect person to ask this because I have to have anybody from Boston that could get here. In basketball, they talk so much about the greatest of all times and the greatest on in their franchises. And I think because of the the way that the game is played now, which for me is gone down. I was a big fan of the 80s and the 90s. I felt like it was a different style of play and just better, more suited to what I liked. But Larry Bird never seemed to come up in the conversation as one of the greatest. Maybe even we have a top 10 list, his name is never on it.

SPEAKER_02 5:12

I don't understand that. Yeah, I feel terrible about that. That's like saying Bobby Orr never played hockey. You know, it's Larry Bird and the whole team back then. And the coach Hourbach, was that his name? Yeah, phenomenal coach, phenomenal team, but Larry. And of course, you know, they they had the short shorts back in those days, right?

SPEAKER_00 5:32

Oh, yeah, way too short.

SPEAKER_02 5:34

And doing all the things. I got to watch them up close and personal, and it was just amazing. But all the players, um, I'd have to go search in the Library of Congress of my brain to pull all their names up, but yeah, it was just extraordinary. And you're right, yeah, things have become too polished and quaffed and I don't know, supercharged. Back then, it was a great game. People were really playing against each other. And of course, yeah, we had the who was the team from Philadelphia, and we had a great player from pardon me, 76ers. Yeah, and so Bill Russell, right? Was he the basketball player? He was just amazing. Well, he yeah, but uh, didn't he start in the 70s? So, yeah, well, anyway, he was the Celtics all the time.

SPEAKER_00 6:24

Now I gotta go search that now. I'm not sure, but after he was the Celtics for his entire career, I thought, but okay.

SPEAKER_02 6:29

Yeah, no, I think I would have remembered that, but again, I'm almost 70 in a few months, so you're fantastic. Thank you.

SPEAKER_00 6:39

All right, so let's see what we try to figure out, figure out all that stuff. So when it comes to Boston, I got an uncle who lives up there, he's moved from Zane, some other cases, he's been up there in that area for a long time. For some reason, he left New York and everyone wanted to come back. I'll let him answer

Why Boston Works So Well

SPEAKER_00 6:53

that for himself. But for me, I always wonder what's the beside the sports fandom, which is definitely uh rampant in your area, what is it about the Boston up New England area that you love more than anything? Don't say the snow because that can't be the right answer.

SPEAKER_02 7:09

No, it does it's first of all, it's a very doable city because you have Boston, but you also have Cambridge. You can get anywhere walking. I mean, you can do the whole Freedom Trail walking, and the history is really mind-blowing. When you walk by the graveyard where you know Ben Franklin is buried, you've got all this history of what it looked like and felt like from the really, you know, the Boston Tea Party days to the uh 1800s. It's amazing. And of course, the educational institutions bring in fascinating people from all walks of life, from all over the world. It's a young city because we have 35 at higher educational universities and colleges in the greater Boston area. And you're on a seaport, which is wonderful. You're the ocean, you've got the Mystic River with the sailboats there, as well as the Haba. And it's just a fascinating area. And New England. So I live about 25 miles northwest of Boston, and where I live, right off Route 93, not the 93, which you often hear in movies because that's how people in LA and Hollywood talk about their highways. 93. I'm at I'm parked downtown in 30 minutes, I'm at the airport in 35, I'm at the beach in 35 to 40 minutes, and I'm up hiking in the white mountains in an hour and a half.

SPEAKER_01 8:37

I love it.

SPEAKER_02 8:38

And I can be on my way to New York in a heartbeat, right? So it's just so doable. And there's always something going on that's interesting because of so many so many younger adults who are there bringing their new curiosity, innovation. And that's why in the late, I'd say about 2008, the mayor at the time got very focused, and the governor too, Governor Patrick, got very focused on bringing the startup ecosystem here, really challenging Silicon Valley and San Francisco. And we've gone back and forth as being number one in innovation and supporting startups here.

SPEAKER_00 9:23

I love that. There's a there's definitely a lot to do. I've always heard that. So it's good to have that insight from you. You're moving to Shakeup for sure. You're doing a lot of things. I'd love for you to kind of, but I don't want to make sure we honor our time that we have because I have so many questions. I try to do my best to get it in. But you got so many things that you're doing uh personally. I love what you're doing with your podcast. I I love to hear why you started, don't be caged by your age, because you're you're full of life and a burst of sunshine, as far as I'm concerned. Love to hear why you decided to go ahead and start that show and to kind of help people who are in that uh 65 and old area. Why was that important to you?

SPEAKER_02 10:00

Well, you know, for eight years I was a startup mentor because I've had four startups of my own businesses. And so I became heavily involved in the startup ecosystem here. And for three years, I co-hosted a monthly pitch event right

Startups Expose Everyday Ageism

SPEAKER_02 10:13

in downtown Boston where five founders would have 99 seconds to pitch their value prop to a live audience of about 50 to 75 folks. And we had investors as the quote, judges who would give their feedback. And I would often hear questions and well-meaning questions like, could you explain your business more like you were telling your grandmother? And I would want to jump out of my seat because, first of all, that's gendered ageism, and also no respect for what we built in the 70s, how we had to go from slide rulers to handheld calculators to from manual typewriters to PCs to, you know, dial-up phones to smartphones. We are tech legends, not tech challenged. And so it really used to upset me. But also, as you mentioned, I tend to be a very enthusiastic, upbeat person with great energy. And I knew they all thought I was at least 10 years younger than I really was. And so I was around 65, and I'm thinking, I've got to come out about my age. These people often lump me in with in mid-50s people. And so when I turned 66, I got off Amazon the root 66 sign, and I held it in front of me and took a photo. And you can see in the look of my face, I have it pinned on LinkedIn. I it clearly it says, Will you still love me and respect me now that you know I'm this friggin' old? But I did a post called Don't Be Caged by Your Age, and it went viral. And the comments were inspirational and heartbreaking. Inspirational and how folks figured out how to thrive after 65, but also heartbreaking at so many folks who were so challenged by ageism and how it had stopped them in their careers and their tracks, and they were lost and feeling so alone and disconnected and so invisible. And so I said, okay, I'm out of the startup ecosystem. I need to become a pro-ager, I need to talk about this, and I need to interview folks who are 65 plus, because you know representation matters, right? And so when you can start seeing people figuring things out, how did they, you know, find ways to fuel their passion, their purpose, and their pocketbook? It's inspirational for others who tune in and it also shatters all those age-related expectations and stereotypes. So I'm almost to 100 episodes. I launched it in March 2004. Thank you. And I've been podcasting since 2012, so it was a no-brainer just to switch from startup life podcast, right, to this. And it just has been wonderful to have conversations with folks from you know all over the world about how they're thriving after 65 and really giving a nice positive spotlight to aging out loud and prep.

SPEAKER_00 13:10

Love it. I don't know if you if you deal directly with women or not, but this there's definitely a strong, how can I word this? A strong anti-aging message that comes across television. I mean, I don't care, I don't watch a lot of TV, but when I do, it's at different times during the day. It's not any any set patterns. It can be sometimes in the mornings, which is rare, afternoons a good bit, sometimes in the evening a

Anti-Aging Marketing Sells Shame

SPEAKER_00 13:33

little bit, but there's consistently an anti-aging message for women across the board. Why do you believe that's so harmful to women?

SPEAKER_02 13:41

Oh, so many reasons why. I have a great Substack post on this too, which is basically I believe these anti-aging companies and brands are not selling use, they're selling shame. And because none of their products are going to make you look younger, you've had that day, whether it was yesterday or 10 years ago. That day is over. You're never going to get it back. You can stay strong and do all the things that you need to as you age, but to say stop aging, and then you've got women whose frontal lobes haven't fully formed yet, right? Taking Botox in their 20s because they're so afraid of wrinkles. It is fear, it is shame, and you always feel like you're the one to blame for aging. It's a very powerful and awful negative connotation to put out there, youth focused. When the fact is you're aging and it's okay. And if you're still alive at my age, what a gift. You know, people who have passed in their 30s, 40s, 50s. You know, to get this far should be honored and celebrated, not putting us out. I often say pastures are made for horses, not humans, right? They just because the clock strikes midnight on a milestone age doesn't mean you're ready to go out to pasture. And here's the really important thing for people to hear the World Health Organization a few years ago declared retirement an epidemic costing societies billions of dollars because it pushes so many people out. They have an idea, people who saved money and are in a financial position to travel and do golf. After a certain point, they're trying to figure out what do I do because they're lacking purpose. But many folks are not ready to retire and financially shouldn't be retiring. And now all of a sudden they're sitting on their couch, they're watching Netflix, maybe playing with their grandkids, and the brain is starting to go. And then all of a sudden, they're also feeling depressed because they feel invisible, disconnected through all the ageism that's out there, and they start getting symptoms for illnesses they may not have ever had because of their feeling depressed and and just that disconnected feeling. So it's really detrimental to folks out there. We have to, if you make it to 65, highly likely the numbers show you're going to make it to 85. What are you going to do with those 20 years?

SPEAKER_00 16:23

Yeah, I like that. I like that. I hope many many people who are close to you, family, friends, they are firm believers in kind of that mindset of keeping it going.

unknown 16:33

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 16:36

She's always in school. And she's always called into them. She refuses to slow down. She doesn't want to stop it because she feels exactly like you do. In slowing down, something things begin to deteriorate. She is a hard charger, but that's where I get it from. So I'm totally, I totally get that. Why do you think it's important, real quick? Because I have some time for maybe two more questions after that. Hopefully, why do you think it's important for people who are considered senior citizens to kind of stay engaged and learn new skills and continue to keep because of what you said, or just more personal more personal reasons why you think it's important?

SPEAKER_02 17:13

Well, studies show the data shows for longevity, it's not what you're eating, drinking, strength training, and all of that. It's community, it's being out there and using your brain and staying engaged and being part of intergenerational relationships and friendships. Uh, you know, it's great the 55 plus crowd, but you got to get back out into the world with all the generations. And I'm a firm believer, the more you have the courage to be the oldest person in the room, the more the younger generations are going to be able to shift their perceptions around aging because they're going to see you yakking away, doing your thing, learning like your mama, going back to school and doing all the things and go, oh, you mean I don't have like a clock with you know an expiration

Community And Purpose After 65

SPEAKER_02 18:04

date here saying you better get those dreams fulfilled by 55 or it's all over, pal. No, you know, you can still be pursuing dreams and passions and pulling on threads well into your 80s. It's yeah, and some people's 90s, it's amazing.

SPEAKER_00 18:19

Yeah. There's an old song and an old mantra, if you will, back my time in New York. I heard it, I learned it there, and I've heard it ever since. Age ain't nothing but a number. And I've heard that so many times. I'm like, I'm really, I'm really understanding now what that means. Even though I'm not at peak athlete athletic condition like I used to be when I was in my 20s, at the age I'm in right now, I feel I feel better right now than I have in such a long time that I know age has nothing to do with it, can't be a determining factor in my success and in my personal development and growth. It can't be. I feel fantastic. I feel better than I did in my 30s and my 40s, as a matter of fact. So of course.

SPEAKER_02 18:59

And you feel better about yourself, you're more involved, you have a better understanding of yourself. And now is the time for the older generation, I call them seasoned citizens, to be mentoring.

SPEAKER_00 19:10

I'm not there yet. I've seen it about nine years. I'm not there yet.

SPEAKER_01 19:15

I've been there for nine years.

SPEAKER_02 19:17

But what you do find is that you want to manage your energy portfolio, right? Because you know, you want to have more of like a 20 to 30 hour work week versus the 40 to 60 hustle grind capitalist mentality. Yeah, but also one thing we have to remember is when people say, oh, 70 is the new 50 or 60 is the new 40, again, all that emphasis on youth. Don't discount those 20 years that you just lived and learned and fought your way through. That's terrible. 70 is 70, 60 is 60. Honor those ages. Yes, they're just a number, but it's also important to honor the fact that you're still alive, you're able to move, think, talk, you know, use your brain, all the things, and you're aging. And it's okay to age.

SPEAKER_00 20:12

I love it. Thank you so much. It's good. All right, one final question. We'll take whatever time we whatever time we have left for you to answer it. Because I'm in this podcasting game now, it's been six years. I did it right around the time of the pandemic, and we've been going strong. We got four shows on our brand now, so we're definitely rocking and rolling, like you said earlier. I want you to kind of just share just a little bit of why you started the podcasting group that you started in about a couple of years ago, and some tips for podcasters who are one, starting for the first time, and two, maybe hitting that plateau, that wall, and thinking about quitting. I'll give you a lot of people and just but do the things. I got this.

SPEAKER_02 20:56

I got this. So at the same time I started, don't be caged by your age. Yeah, I was 67 coming into the year 2024, it

Building A Podcaster Meetup Community

SPEAKER_02 21:03

was in March. And I said, you know what? I need community, I need to find people. It's harder as you get older to make friends. You're so much more discerning about who you want to hang out with and how much time you have left, right? Who am I going to spend that with? And I love indie podcasters. Again, I've been podcasting since 2012. I find them so fascinating. And I love going to the annual events, podcast movement, and pod fest. But how do you keep everybody in touch over the years? And again, I was kind of self-first, selfish of me to think, how can I start a community? And I'd already done that once a month, you know, with startups. So I knew what that looked and felt like. And I said, I am going to start a podcast community meetup. Every second Saturday of the month, I want to meet with fellow New England podcasters in person. I want to look in their eyes. I want to hug them. I want to hear their stories. I want all the side conversations, and I want everyone to feel like they belong. And I want an intergenerational. And I put out feelers among a few of the podcasters in the area. And one of them came back and said, Boy, have I got the perfect place for us to meet. It's called Westford Cat. It's a cable access TV studio, state-of-the-art TV studio, state-of-the-art podcast studio. We have a lot of cable access TV stations around the New England area. And this particular space was right off a major highway where everybody would be coming in from Connecticut, Rhode Island, Massachusetts, Maine, New Hampshire, and Vermont. So very easy to get to, plenty of pockets. And so one of the things I did to To shore it up for myself is because you know you can hold a party and no one shows up, right? So I made sure, like, yeah, one of my favorites, Lou Board Tone was going to be there. I asked my friend Angel B. Hartwell, hey, will you talk about monetizing podcasts? She's been doing that forever. She's terrific. And I thought, and then the guy who, you know, introduced me to the location, I said, okay, we got four of us. This will work. And of course, we had 15 that showed up, and we've been growing like crazy ever since. In fact, one year in, I created a membership because, as I said to everyone, look, if for anything to have longevity and be sustainable, we have to fund it. So who's in as founding members, right? And so we got that going. And then I built an online companion because I had a lot of folks knocking on the door saying, What we don't live in New England, but we want to play too. And so I created the community pod garden. And for $150 a year, folks can come join us. I have experts come in. We have a virtual huddle every month, and everybody gets, of course, a free ticket to come to the in-person event. And because it's a TV studio, we it's very easy to bring in the Zoom participants. And because we zoom in on everybody, it's easy for them to feel like they're part of the in-person event as well.

SPEAKER_00 24:04

That's fantastic. And you definitely brought a burst of sunshine to our show. Thank you again for being a part of the conversation, not only about podcasting, also about community, intergenerational relationships, and of course the ageism issue that we have in our world. So thank you again for coming in and sharing so poignantly. Appreciate it.

SPEAKER_02 24:23

Thank you for having me. And first time podcasters, it's one of the best and budget-friendly things that you can do to stay connected, especially if you're over 65. It's a great way to meet new people. And then I just want to answer the question if when you hit a plateau, remember why you're podcasting. It's not about the downloads, it's about that listener who is motivated or inspired or has an aha moment or feels connected with you because you're telling a story that they relate to. It's so important to remember why you launched your podcast.

SPEAKER_00 24:55

This is the kind of stuff that we this is why we do what we do and why you do what you do. Thanks again for being a part of this. And for you guys that are watching and listening for the first time, thanks for making

Podcast Plateaus And Closing Asks

SPEAKER_00 25:03

us part of your week. If you don't mind, Andy, please follow us on all the social media that you use. Follow us so that way when any questions come through, because they always do at some point in time, they'll come through. I'd love to be able to answer your own questions because, of course, you're the expert in these areas. So please follow us on our socials. And you guys watching, listen, also, please follow, subscribe to our YouTube channel, Apple Podcasts. Have you find your podcast, have you use your podcast, listen and watch? Please follow us. And of course, that's Andy Lyons. I'm Mr. You. Thanks for being a part of this show on the flagship. Then call me Mr. You the Podcast. Age ain't nothing but a number of people.