{"version":"1.0.0","segments":[{"startTime":57.833000000000006,"endTime":66.449,"body":"things that's kind of funny is that I've been, you know how I've told you I've been making"},{"startTime":57.833000000000006,"endTime":66.449,"body":"the micro dose LSD things."},{"startTime":68.07300000000001,"endTime":73.307,"body":"So a lot of that requires trial and error."},{"startTime":76.4,"endTime":77.211,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":78.269,"endTime":80.852,"body":"I think we're doing, I think we're doing fine on lag, are we?"},{"startTime":80.852,"endTime":81.79400000000001,"body":"Are we not?"},{"startTime":82.325,"endTime":84.095,"body":"Mine, mine just for, okay, here we go."},{"startTime":84.095,"endTime":87.025,"body":"Now I'm back at 90 something percent uploading for a while there."},{"startTime":87.025,"endTime":87.61500000000001,"body":"Mine was at zero."},{"startTime":87.61500000000001,"endTime":90.964,"body":"So I was like, is it even recording, you know, type of thing."},{"startTime":92.36500000000001,"endTime":95.565,"body":"anyway, so I've been doing trial and error on that."},{"startTime":95.565,"endTime":101.14500000000001,"body":"And, you know, some days it's like, that was just totally imperceptible."},{"startTime":101.14500000000001,"endTime":108.325,"body":"I got to push it up against the limits of it being pers like of it just being perceptible"},{"startTime":101.14500000000001,"endTime":108.325,"body":"and then take it back a little bit of a notch."},{"startTime":108.845,"endTime":111.708,"body":"And today I'm a little bit above the line."},{"startTime":111.708,"endTime":111.982,"body":"Hi."},{"startTime":111.982,"endTime":115.191,"body":"I'm like just just like a tiny little bit of them like."},{"startTime":118.47,"endTime":120.299,"body":"yeah, how do you measure it again?"},{"startTime":120.299,"endTime":121.43100000000001,"body":"How do you do it?"},{"startTime":121.941,"endTime":128.621,"body":"Well, I'm just, I'm using like a tiny little bit of vodka and then distilled water."},{"startTime":128.621,"endTime":135.74099999999999,"body":"And so, you know, I just make my, I just make my little solution and then it sits for a"},{"startTime":128.621,"endTime":135.74099999999999,"body":"certain amount of time."},{"startTime":135.74099999999999,"endTime":141.101,"body":"And then I, and then I try to measure out what that produces, you know."},{"startTime":141.49,"endTime":145.595,"body":"But you measure it out like in a like a little measuring cup."},{"startTime":145.976,"endTime":146.976,"body":"Or what?"},{"startTime":147.198,"endTime":148.09,"body":"Yeah, OK."},{"startTime":148.09,"endTime":149.03,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":149.03,"endTime":149.95,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":150.091,"endTime":151.49099999999999,"body":"I mean, I yeah."},{"startTime":151.49099999999999,"endTime":164.767,"body":"So like I what I mean by that is I'm at a place right now where like like 15 milliliters"},{"startTime":151.49099999999999,"endTime":164.767,"body":"is like the right amount for a micro dose for one that's like for so 15 milliliters are"},{"startTime":164.767,"endTime":165.228,"body":"pretty small."},{"startTime":165.228,"endTime":169.41899999999998,"body":"You know, if you think about like those little syringes that come with kids medicine."},{"startTime":170.78,"endTime":173.101,"body":"So it's like."},{"startTime":174.562,"endTime":176.856,"body":"At 15 milliliters, I don't feel it."},{"startTime":176.856,"endTime":178.188,"body":"Today I'm a little bit higher than that."},{"startTime":178.188,"endTime":184.87,"body":"So I have been kind of feeling it, not to a point where it's been incapacitated or"},{"startTime":178.188,"endTime":184.87,"body":"anything like that."},{"startTime":184.87,"endTime":185.736,"body":"you know what mean?"},{"startTime":185.914,"endTime":187.15500000000003,"body":"Yeah, I did."},{"startTime":188.07600000000002,"endTime":192.731,"body":"I guess I tick-tack or typically do 10 to 12 milliliters."},{"startTime":192.731,"endTime":194.55200000000002,"body":"Is 100 like a full tap?"},{"startTime":195.36900000000003,"endTime":202.68200000000002,"body":"Yeah, yeah, so well, it might well, guess it just depends on the I guess it depends on"},{"startTime":195.36900000000003,"endTime":202.68200000000002,"body":"what somebody is working with, right?"},{"startTime":202.68200000000002,"endTime":206.69299999999998,"body":"Because people could have like a people could have like a tincture or they could have like"},{"startTime":202.68200000000002,"endTime":206.69299999999998,"body":"any kind of thing."},{"startTime":207.73399999999998,"endTime":215.21699999999998,"body":"Right, like like a like a typical like LSD tap would be like a probably like 100 or 150"},{"startTime":207.73399999999998,"endTime":215.21699999999998,"body":"micrograms, right?"},{"startTime":215.21699999999998,"endTime":218.378,"body":"But then it's but then it's like getting liquid."},{"startTime":218.599,"endTime":219.29899999999998,"body":"It's a whole thing."},{"startTime":219.29899999999998,"endTime":220.11900000000003,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":220.49900000000002,"endTime":222.55,"body":"And I and clearly I don't fucking understand it."},{"startTime":222.55,"endTime":224.731,"body":"So I'm just working on it."},{"startTime":224.85899999999998,"endTime":229.454,"body":"put mine in a Purell bottle and then I squirt it in my mouth."},{"startTime":230.65300000000002,"endTime":234.91700000000003,"body":"So do you find, cause it's like a pump, right?"},{"startTime":234.91700000000003,"endTime":236.39800000000002,"body":"Like the little pump deal."},{"startTime":237.139,"endTime":239.76100000000002,"body":"I mean, you clean that thing out like crazy, I assume."},{"startTime":240.88299999999998,"endTime":243.505,"body":"Do you find that the pump dies out on you?"},{"startTime":244.402,"endTime":247.58800000000002,"body":"Well, I find that sometimes I don't get a good squirt."},{"startTime":247.58800000000002,"endTime":251.317,"body":"And so then it's like, well, then did that squirt count or not?"},{"startTime":251.317,"endTime":256.937,"body":"Yeah, dude, that would be, so that's why I try to keep mine liquid and I have little, like"},{"startTime":251.317,"endTime":256.937,"body":"I have little sacrament cups about it."},{"startTime":256.937,"endTime":257.677,"body":"Do know what I mean?"},{"startTime":257.677,"endTime":259.237,"body":"Like literally, I like it."},{"startTime":259.237,"endTime":263.799,"body":"I like that they're little tiny sacrament cups, cause it's like a little bit of a, yeah,"},{"startTime":259.237,"endTime":263.799,"body":"little bit of a thing."},{"startTime":263.799,"endTime":266.823,"body":"Plus it's a sacrament as members of the Divine Assembly."},{"startTime":266.964,"endTime":270.67900000000003,"body":"We're talking about measuring out our sacrament."},{"startTime":270.869,"endTime":272.958,"body":"Yeah, because you want to be specific with that shit, right?"},{"startTime":272.958,"endTime":275.126,"body":"As far as like how the sacrament works."},{"startTime":275.126,"endTime":280.335,"body":"And you want to not like, you want to get all the words of the prayer right and not miss a"},{"startTime":275.126,"endTime":280.335,"body":"word."},{"startTime":280.339,"endTime":286.363,"body":"Yeah, dude, can you imagine some dipshit saying the body instead of blood on accident?"},{"startTime":286.363,"endTime":288.05400000000003,"body":"No, send him back."},{"startTime":288.235,"endTime":289.376,"body":"Back to square one, bud."},{"startTime":289.376,"endTime":290.366,"body":"Do not pass go."},{"startTime":290.366,"endTime":290.91700000000003,"body":"Do not collect $200."},{"startTime":290.91700000000003,"endTime":291.967,"body":"You're back."},{"startTime":291.967,"endTime":292.878,"body":"You're done."},{"startTime":292.878,"endTime":296.44,"body":"The Lord has no idea what the fuck you're talking about now."},{"startTime":296.761,"endTime":297.682,"body":"My God."},{"startTime":297.682,"endTime":299.54200000000003,"body":"God is such a little bitch."},{"startTime":299.963,"endTime":303.025,"body":"It's just like, what did he even mean by that last one?"},{"startTime":304.614,"endTime":309.477,"body":"I mean, I get ritual and the importance of ritual."},{"startTime":310.118,"endTime":312.559,"body":"But is that a step over the top?"},{"startTime":313.0,"endTime":315.972,"body":"Do other organizations do that?"},{"startTime":317.791,"endTime":318.80199999999996,"body":"Good question."},{"startTime":318.80199999999996,"endTime":320.573,"body":"mean, I guess probably, right?"},{"startTime":320.573,"endTime":327.709,"body":"mean, like if you think about like, like, like think about any sort of like spell, like,"},{"startTime":320.573,"endTime":327.709,"body":"right?"},{"startTime":328.05,"endTime":331.082,"body":"Like you got to say the words dead on for that."},{"startTime":331.082,"endTime":337.138,"body":"Like, you know, you're reading out of the book of shit, dude, I'm talking wicked now, you"},{"startTime":331.082,"endTime":337.138,"body":"know, you're reading out of the book of spells or whatever it is."},{"startTime":337.138,"endTime":340.601,"body":"it's like, yeah, you got to say those words dead on or the spell doesn't work."},{"startTime":340.601,"endTime":342.96299999999997,"body":"The animals, the monkeys won't get wings or whatever."},{"startTime":342.96299999999997,"endTime":345.84299999999996,"body":"You know, I don't want to give spoilers to wicked, but"},{"startTime":345.84299999999996,"endTime":347.437,"body":"The monkeys get wings out of it."},{"startTime":347.437,"endTime":351.307,"body":"Spoilers for the Wizard of Oz from 1942 or whatever."},{"startTime":351.307,"endTime":353.711,"body":"The monkeys have wings, you idiots."},{"startTime":355.03499999999997,"endTime":357.851,"body":"What is the statute of limitations on spoilers?"},{"startTime":357.851,"endTime":361.27299999999997,"body":"Yeah, dude, because like, yeah, what is that?"},{"startTime":361.27299999999997,"endTime":363.205,"body":"That's, that would be fun to try to track down, right?"},{"startTime":363.205,"endTime":369.78,"body":"Cause obviously we could do stuff like with, you know, star war, like there's big things,"},{"startTime":363.205,"endTime":369.78,"body":"you know, how far back do you go?"},{"startTime":369.78,"endTime":375.584,"body":"Like fight club is, is fight club is 25 years newer than star wars."},{"startTime":375.584,"endTime":377.42199999999997,"body":"Can you, can you spoil fight club?"},{"startTime":377.42199999999997,"endTime":380.243,"body":"I think that's past the statute of- I think it's like..."},{"startTime":380.243,"endTime":381.274,"body":"What about, okay."},{"startTime":381.274,"endTime":383.256,"body":"What about the sixth sense?"},{"startTime":383.256,"endTime":385.39799999999997,"body":"The sixth sense is after fight club."},{"startTime":385.39799999999997,"endTime":388.454,"body":"So, so when can, yeah."},{"startTime":388.454,"endTime":396.42699999999996,"body":"if you encounter someone who hasn't seen The Sixth Sense or hasn't seen Fight Club, you"},{"startTime":388.454,"endTime":396.42699999999996,"body":"don't want to spoil it for them."},{"startTime":396.747,"endTime":403.44,"body":"the same time, if we're going to talk about it, we don't need to give a spoiler alert"},{"startTime":396.747,"endTime":403.44,"body":"before we talk about those two movies."},{"startTime":403.861,"endTime":404.191,"body":"Right."},{"startTime":404.191,"endTime":404.561,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":404.561,"endTime":407.01099999999997,"body":"And I don't think we need to give spoilers about wicked either."},{"startTime":407.01099999999997,"endTime":408.20099999999996,"body":"You know what I mean?"},{"startTime":408.32099999999997,"endTime":409.881,"body":"Like wicked has been the books."},{"startTime":409.881,"endTime":416.921,"body":"I remember reading the book when I was dude, that book is probably, I think I read that"},{"startTime":409.881,"endTime":416.921,"body":"book before my mission."},{"startTime":418.421,"endTime":422.481,"body":"So wicked's been around for 20 something, 25 years."},{"startTime":422.481,"endTime":425.31,"body":"think the book's 95."},{"startTime":425.495,"endTime":427.61699999999996,"body":"And then the musical."},{"startTime":427.71799999999996,"endTime":429.70099999999996,"body":"Well, I think I saw it lately."},{"startTime":429.70099999999996,"endTime":436.449,"body":"They're talking about the book was 95 and the musical was 2001 or something."},{"startTime":436.59,"endTime":439.551,"body":"I think I saw some graphic on it or something."},{"startTime":439.551,"endTime":440.941,"body":"Did you remember when Wicked came out?"},{"startTime":440.941,"endTime":443.262,"body":"Like that thing was the hottest shit in the history of the world."},{"startTime":443.262,"endTime":453.295,"body":"Like up until Wicked, was like, listen, there's basically like, there's basically two"},{"startTime":443.262,"endTime":453.295,"body":"major musicals and it's the Phantom of the Opera and Les Miserables."},{"startTime":453.295,"endTime":457.096,"body":"Now I know all the musical people out there being like, Doug, what about Such a Session?"},{"startTime":457.096,"endTime":460.687,"body":"You've forgotten, you know, Starlight Express and The King and I and Cats."},{"startTime":460.687,"endTime":461.747,"body":"I get it."},{"startTime":461.767,"endTime":468.61699999999996,"body":"I'm saying that up until Wicked, I considered there to be two musicals and it was Les"},{"startTime":461.767,"endTime":468.61699999999996,"body":"Miserables,"},{"startTime":468.61699999999996,"endTime":469.88,"body":"and the Phantom of the Opera."},{"startTime":469.88,"endTime":472.554,"body":"And then Wicked came out and I was like, shit, there's now three musicals."},{"startTime":472.554,"endTime":476.51,"body":"Like that's how significant Wicked was when it came out."},{"startTime":476.651,"endTime":477.323,"body":"You know what mean?"},{"startTime":477.323,"endTime":482.827,"body":"kind of launch a rebirth of like a new wave of musicals kind of."},{"startTime":484.89,"endTime":485.69,"body":"Maybe."},{"startTime":485.69,"endTime":490.574,"body":"But Wicked It was a funny one for me because you know how into musicals I am."},{"startTime":490.935,"endTime":498.597,"body":"So I actually saw it with the original cast in New York with Kristin Chenoweth and yeah,"},{"startTime":490.935,"endTime":498.597,"body":"yeah."},{"startTime":498.597,"endTime":500.89099999999996,"body":"like, yeah, dude, she's so good."},{"startTime":502.194,"endTime":505.70599999999996,"body":"and, but, I, and I loved it."},{"startTime":505.70599999999996,"endTime":508.11699999999996,"body":"I walked away at me and like, wow, that was really good."},{"startTime":508.11699999999996,"endTime":513.249,"body":"But I didn't then listen to the songs on repeat or I didn't go buy it back then."},{"startTime":513.249,"endTime":518.2,"body":"It would have been like buying it on or finding it on Napster or something, you know?"},{"startTime":518.241,"endTime":519.1610000000001,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":519.621,"endTime":521.001,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":522.3000000000001,"endTime":525.822,"body":"Dude, wish that our, I kind of wish that we were in that era."},{"startTime":525.822,"endTime":536.5500000000001,"body":"Like I wish that our podcast was only available through illegal download through like"},{"startTime":525.822,"endTime":536.5500000000001,"body":"Morpheus.com or LimeWire.gov or whatever it was."},{"startTime":536.5500000000001,"endTime":537.814,"body":"mean, Mormons and Mushrooms should be."},{"startTime":537.814,"endTime":541.266,"body":"We've talked about doing the Mormons and Mushrooms underground."},{"startTime":541.266,"endTime":542.57,"body":"We should."},{"startTime":542.94,"endTime":548.443,"body":"we're the underground, but also you can get us where all of your favorite podcasts are"},{"startTime":542.94,"endTime":548.443,"body":"found."},{"startTime":549.8050000000001,"endTime":550.695,"body":"You know?"},{"startTime":551.12,"endTime":556.256,"body":"but I didn't, so I didn't ever like binge the music afterwards."},{"startTime":556.256,"endTime":558.554,"body":"The music to me was kind of like, meh."},{"startTime":558.554,"endTime":560.7950000000001,"body":"mean, there's a couple of good songs that really stuck with me."},{"startTime":560.7950000000001,"endTime":565.73,"body":"like the ones that like, I have been changed for good or something."},{"startTime":565.73,"endTime":568.518,"body":"I think that's maybe in the second act."},{"startTime":570.239,"endTime":574.461,"body":"but like Define Gravity, I was kind of like, meh."},{"startTime":575.061,"endTime":576.952,"body":"I still feel like that song's meh."},{"startTime":577.471,"endTime":587.9200000000001,"body":"Dude, Mike, I'm so glad that we're talking this way because I couldn't agree more and"},{"startTime":577.471,"endTime":587.9200000000001,"body":"we're probably going to get run out of town for saying this, right?"},{"startTime":587.9200000000001,"endTime":589.571,"body":"Well, I'm sticking to it."},{"startTime":589.571,"endTime":600.345,"body":"Now, to be fair, whenever that last line comes on and she's like, and if you care to find"},{"startTime":589.571,"endTime":600.345,"body":"me, look to the Western sky, I get chills every fucking time."},{"startTime":600.345,"endTime":602.1160000000001,"body":"So, okay, I'm going to give it that."},{"startTime":602.1160000000001,"endTime":607.9580000000001,"body":"the rest of the time until that, it's like, there's no hook to it."},{"startTime":607.9580000000001,"endTime":610.0390000000001,"body":"The lyrics are meh."},{"startTime":610.0390000000001,"endTime":617.8820000000001,"body":"I get that it probably speaks to, you know, I can relate to the lyrics, you know, like,"},{"startTime":617.995,"endTime":621.2320000000001,"body":"So it's not like the lyrics are unrelatable to me."},{"startTime":621.5250000000001,"endTime":623.0250000000001,"body":"Hold on a second."},{"startTime":623.0250000000001,"endTime":637.5250000000001,"body":"When you say, when you like sort of like hold your hat in your hand and sort of like toe"},{"startTime":623.0250000000001,"endTime":637.5250000000001,"body":"an invisible dot on the floor and say sort of like sheepishly, I can relate to defined"},{"startTime":637.5250000000001,"endTime":638.0450000000001,"body":"gravity."},{"startTime":638.0450000000001,"endTime":641.065,"body":"Who do you, well of course, what are you talking about?"},{"startTime":641.125,"endTime":643.505,"body":"Who do you think that's for?"},{"startTime":643.942,"endTime":653.5400000000001,"body":"Well, the only reason why I brought that up, not because like a specific set of people,"},{"startTime":643.942,"endTime":653.5400000000001,"body":"but I was just being, I was going to be like, okay, but maybe, maybe the lyrics don't"},{"startTime":653.5400000000001,"endTime":655.5920000000001,"body":"speak to my journey at all."},{"startTime":655.5920000000001,"endTime":662.8380000000001,"body":"And so if they did, maybe they'd resonate with me more, but I'm like, no, I think, I can"},{"startTime":655.5920000000001,"endTime":662.8380000000001,"body":"really relate to the lyrics."},{"startTime":662.8380000000001,"endTime":663.898,"body":"just don't."},{"startTime":663.898,"endTime":666.2800000000001,"body":"This, it doesn't do much for me."},{"startTime":666.2800000000001,"endTime":673.6360000000001,"body":"And even when I re-listen to it and re-listen to the new recording of it, which I did"},{"startTime":666.2800000000001,"endTime":673.6360000000001,"body":"once, I saw it on TikTok a couple of weeks ago."},{"startTime":674.6070000000001,"endTime":687.4680000000001,"body":"Someone was like, dude, when you hear this new recording of whoever the new woman is, and"},{"startTime":674.6070000000001,"endTime":687.4680000000001,"body":"so I listened to it and I almost just skipped forward to the end, but I listened to the"},{"startTime":687.4680000000001,"endTime":688.258,"body":"whole thing."},{"startTime":688.9590000000001,"endTime":691.431,"body":"Well, that song is so long too."},{"startTime":691.431,"endTime":695.123,"body":"By the way, okay, I guess this is just us talking about Wicked for a few minutes."},{"startTime":695.123,"endTime":699.176,"body":"Is that okay if we just keep talking about Wicked?"},{"startTime":699.8090000000001,"endTime":713.436,"body":"I can't tell you how much I agree with you and I think Defying Gravity might be the most"},{"startTime":699.8090000000001,"endTime":713.436,"body":"overrated like block, like banger, like the most overrated big song from a musical that I"},{"startTime":713.436,"endTime":714.5070000000001,"body":"can think of."},{"startTime":715.3480000000001,"endTime":717.5690000000001,"body":"Because like other than"},{"startTime":718.417,"endTime":722.841,"body":"I just might try defying gravity like that other than that line."},{"startTime":723.9830000000001,"endTime":730.37,"body":"Can you OK, and then you did the one of like, and so if you want to find me, look to the"},{"startTime":723.9830000000001,"endTime":730.37,"body":"western skies."},{"startTime":730.6510000000001,"endTime":733.383,"body":"Can you say another word from that from that song?"},{"startTime":735.024,"endTime":736.907,"body":"No, I think I'll try to find gravity."},{"startTime":736.907,"endTime":744.038,"body":"Just make up all these things to be like, gravity."},{"startTime":744.038,"endTime":748.081,"body":"Yeah, no."},{"startTime":748.081,"endTime":750.268,"body":"I'm defying gravity."},{"startTime":750.268,"endTime":751.743,"body":"It's like, okay, we get it."},{"startTime":751.743,"endTime":753.339,"body":"Just get on your broom and fucking..."},{"startTime":753.339,"endTime":754.481,"body":"Fuck off!"},{"startTime":754.8000000000001,"endTime":756.152,"body":"Maybe I'll try..."},{"startTime":756.4100000000001,"endTime":758.697,"body":"No, really guys, I'm gonna really try it."},{"startTime":759.207,"endTime":760.759,"body":"Next, I'll..."},{"startTime":761.321,"endTime":764.325,"body":"on the slide, defying gravity."},{"startTime":765.783,"endTime":767.104,"body":"But you saw the movie."},{"startTime":767.104,"endTime":768.206,"body":"Did you love it?"},{"startTime":769.469,"endTime":770.2890000000001,"body":"No."},{"startTime":770.49,"endTime":772.07,"body":"So I saw the movie."},{"startTime":773.351,"endTime":777.5550000000001,"body":"First of all, everyone that's in the movie is amazing."},{"startTime":777.5550000000001,"endTime":781.187,"body":"It's absolutely incredible how people can sing so well."},{"startTime":781.187,"endTime":785.0400000000001,"body":"don't know how, I really don't know how people can hit notes."},{"startTime":785.0400000000001,"endTime":785.599,"body":"You know what I mean?"},{"startTime":785.599,"endTime":787.561,"body":"Like it blows my mind."},{"startTime":788.042,"endTime":798.2990000000001,"body":"And just because you have something that's gonna make $3 billion and you have performers"},{"startTime":788.042,"endTime":798.2990000000001,"body":"that can hit every note in the entire songbook."},{"startTime":798.793,"endTime":804.995,"body":"That does not mean that you have to subject me to being in the fucking movie theater for"},{"startTime":798.793,"endTime":804.995,"body":"three and a half hours."},{"startTime":805.095,"endTime":809.157,"body":"Like the actual musical Wicked isn't three hours long."},{"startTime":809.157,"endTime":811.0730000000001,"body":"And this is just part one."},{"startTime":811.0730000000001,"endTime":814.128,"body":"You know, it ends with, you know, well, it ends with Defying Gravity."},{"startTime":814.128,"endTime":820.481,"body":"So if you're familiar with the musical, ends with her, okay, I'm now the Wicked Witch and"},{"startTime":814.128,"endTime":820.481,"body":"I'm flying off with my horde of monkeys."},{"startTime":820.481,"endTime":822.291,"body":"It's like, okay."},{"startTime":822.673,"endTime":825.186,"body":"And we're only halfway over now."},{"startTime":825.186,"endTime":826.528,"body":"It's been three hours."},{"startTime":826.528,"endTime":829.3330000000001,"body":"I've been in this theater for four because we had to get here early."},{"startTime":829.3330000000001,"endTime":830.3040000000001,"body":"We had to get seats."},{"startTime":830.3040000000001,"endTime":833.148,"body":"We had to watch 33 minutes of previews."},{"startTime":833.148,"endTime":834.3190000000001,"body":"Then we had to watch that weird."},{"startTime":834.3190000000001,"endTime":837.6560000000001,"body":"Do your theaters have that weird Nicole Kidman commercial?"},{"startTime":837.6560000000001,"endTime":839.772,"body":"yeah, one where she was..."},{"startTime":839.772,"endTime":841.0540000000001,"body":"Is it her?"},{"startTime":841.0540000000001,"endTime":842.5680000000001,"body":"Or is it an AI Nicole Kidman?"},{"startTime":842.5680000000001,"endTime":843.167,"body":"I can't tell."},{"startTime":843.167,"endTime":845.4580000000001,"body":"Dude, what is going on in that commercial mic?"},{"startTime":846.139,"endTime":849.6600000000001,"body":"You know how we're going to try to make Nicole Kidman relatable?"},{"startTime":850.361,"endTime":862.388,"body":"We're going to have her put on this like diamond studded pantsuit and wander through an"},{"startTime":850.361,"endTime":862.388,"body":"empty movie theater that we've like, we've chased off all the riff raff and, and, and"},{"startTime":862.388,"endTime":863.4680000000001,"body":"urchins."},{"startTime":863.4680000000001,"endTime":871.013,"body":"And she's going to sit alone in a movie theater pretending that she's paying attention to"},{"startTime":863.4680000000001,"endTime":871.013,"body":"the movie that's like on the screen."},{"startTime":871.013,"endTime":872.283,"body":"And it's just like,"},{"startTime":872.849,"endTime":874.9200000000001,"body":"What's what are you advertising?"},{"startTime":874.9200000000001,"endTime":876.772,"body":"We're already in your fucking theater."},{"startTime":876.772,"endTime":878.123,"body":"What else do you want from me?"},{"startTime":878.123,"endTime":879.033,"body":"I gave you my money."},{"startTime":879.033,"endTime":880.234,"body":"I bought my popcorn."},{"startTime":880.234,"endTime":881.955,"body":"Here's my little soda."},{"startTime":881.955,"endTime":888.0390000000001,"body":"My kids are loaded to the hilt with fucking nerds and candy and popcorn."},{"startTime":888.0390000000001,"endTime":889.69,"body":"What more do you want, Nicole Kidman?"},{"startTime":889.69,"endTime":896.465,"body":"I have given you everything and you still are are demanding I give you more in this"},{"startTime":889.69,"endTime":896.465,"body":"diamond studded pantsuit of yours."},{"startTime":896.465,"endTime":897.707,"body":"Eat shit and die."},{"startTime":897.707,"endTime":902.932,"body":"do they think that this nostalgic play is going to make us want to go to the theater more"},{"startTime":897.707,"endTime":902.932,"body":"just by like it?"},{"startTime":902.932,"endTime":910.653,"body":"Because it's like a play on the nostalgia of the theater experience, which by the way, I"},{"startTime":902.932,"endTime":910.653,"body":"love the theater experience, but you don't have to convince me I'm there in the theater."},{"startTime":910.653,"endTime":912.1360000000001,"body":"I'm here in the theater."},{"startTime":912.1360000000001,"endTime":915.9150000000001,"body":"I don't need to watch Nicole Kinman stomp through puddles to get into the movie theater."},{"startTime":915.9150000000001,"endTime":917.027,"body":"I already did all that shit."},{"startTime":917.027,"endTime":918.109,"body":"I'm here."},{"startTime":918.716,"endTime":920.9530000000001,"body":"You're preaching to the choir at that point, you know?"},{"startTime":920.9530000000001,"endTime":925.053,"body":"Seriously, dude, you pass on the collection plate to the fucking choir."},{"startTime":925.053,"endTime":927.384,"body":"It's like, do you guys believe in Jesus?"},{"startTime":927.384,"endTime":929.485,"body":"And they're like, yeah, we're singing the fucking songs."},{"startTime":929.485,"endTime":931.476,"body":"What do you want from me here, dog?"},{"startTime":932.2760000000001,"endTime":939.878,"body":"Anyway, I don't know how I got off on that tangent, but my point was Wicked is Wicked is"},{"startTime":932.2760000000001,"endTime":939.878,"body":"amazing, but it's way too long."},{"startTime":939.878,"endTime":945.0200000000001,"body":"And it's also I also when I sniff out a cash grab like that, it takes me out of it, dude."},{"startTime":945.0200000000001,"endTime":950.691,"body":"Like they're already I'm already going to pay them all the amount of money that they that"},{"startTime":945.0200000000001,"endTime":950.691,"body":"they want for this thing."},{"startTime":950.9110000000001,"endTime":953.735,"body":"They're already gonna make a billion and a half dollars."},{"startTime":953.735,"endTime":957.1700000000001,"body":"It's gonna be the biggest fucking musical movie of all time."},{"startTime":957.331,"endTime":959.5550000000001,"body":"And it's like, who cares, man?"},{"startTime":959.5550000000001,"endTime":960.8870000000001,"body":"Have some integrity with your art."},{"startTime":960.8870000000001,"endTime":966.5350000000001,"body":"You really need to have a six hour thing to tell the story of the Wicked Witch of the"},{"startTime":960.8870000000001,"endTime":966.5350000000001,"body":"West?"},{"startTime":967.648,"endTime":974.042,"body":"you know, I am glad they're doing it in two parts in a way, because like one of my"},{"startTime":967.648,"endTime":974.042,"body":"favorite musicals is into the woods."},{"startTime":974.202,"endTime":984.548,"body":"And I like, I really liked the Disney movie, but they, they short changed the second act"},{"startTime":974.202,"endTime":984.548,"body":"and the second act is the best part of the whole play."},{"startTime":985.409,"endTime":987.69,"body":"They, they rushed it."},{"startTime":987.989,"endTime":992.1740000000001,"body":"Okay, so now you're saying that they needed to make Wicked."},{"startTime":992.7760000000001,"endTime":995.6400000000001,"body":"Mike, Wicked is going to be over five hours long."},{"startTime":995.6400000000001,"endTime":996.561,"body":"Wicked!"},{"startTime":997.0300000000001,"endTime":1005.59,"body":"not saying that they need to make it over five hours, but I'm saying that maybe combined"},{"startTime":997.0300000000001,"endTime":1005.59,"body":"three split in two movies, you know what I mean?"},{"startTime":1006.532,"endTime":1008.861,"body":"To do justice to it, maybe."},{"startTime":1008.861,"endTime":1012.315,"body":"I still am sniffing that out, I'm, I..."},{"startTime":1012.315,"endTime":1015.927,"body":"every time I watch Into the Woods, I'm like, the second act, you just rushed over the"},{"startTime":1012.315,"endTime":1015.927,"body":"whole thing."},{"startTime":1015.927,"endTime":1019.5590000000001,"body":"I would have rather than like stop it, do a second movie."},{"startTime":1020.38,"endTime":1028.354,"body":"And then, you know, because you can't do a movie over any movie over, especially in a"},{"startTime":1020.38,"endTime":1028.354,"body":"theater over two and a half, two hours and 45 minutes."},{"startTime":1028.354,"endTime":1031.135,"body":"I mean, even Lord of the Rings, I was like, come on."},{"startTime":1031.135,"endTime":1033.114,"body":"Get to the point, guys."},{"startTime":1033.114,"endTime":1036.727,"body":"Yeah, but I mean Lord of the Rings, that's the one exception I'm going to make."},{"startTime":1037.993,"endTime":1040.011,"body":"Yeah, mean, okay, same."},{"startTime":1040.011,"endTime":1044.4759999999999,"body":"I think we're on record as being pro Lord of the Rings."},{"startTime":1046.365,"endTime":1048.646,"body":"I mean, we literally call our band Bombadilio."},{"startTime":1048.646,"endTime":1050.275,"body":"Like, yeah, we'll see you this."},{"startTime":1050.275,"endTime":1055.906,"body":"But like I or bring or bring back intermissions like they do it in them."},{"startTime":1055.906,"endTime":1057.628,"body":"They do it in the theater."},{"startTime":1057.628,"endTime":1061.129,"body":"Like when I say the theater, I'm talking about like plays and musicals and stuff like"},{"startTime":1057.628,"endTime":1061.129,"body":"that."},{"startTime":1061.149,"endTime":1065.59,"body":"So make the movie however long it needs to be and just give me a give me an intermission."},{"startTime":1065.59,"endTime":1076.103,"body":"Give me a chance to stop fidgeting in my seat next to this stranger who is quietly singing"},{"startTime":1065.59,"endTime":1076.103,"body":"the song under her breath."},{"startTime":1076.5529999999999,"endTime":1077.834,"body":"Give me a minute."},{"startTime":1078.196,"endTime":1086.952,"body":"Give me a minute to go away from her so that I don't like, so that I don't like sneaky"},{"startTime":1078.196,"endTime":1086.952,"body":"elbow her in her ribs."},{"startTime":1086.952,"endTime":1088.334,"body":"You know what I mean?"},{"startTime":1088.334,"endTime":1090.637,"body":"I, you know, whatever."},{"startTime":1090.7740000000001,"endTime":1092.624,"body":"Have we lost all our listeners now?"},{"startTime":1092.624,"endTime":1096.194,"body":"they going to be like, are we?"},{"startTime":1098.154,"endTime":1099.844,"body":"no, I don't mean that."},{"startTime":1099.844,"endTime":1101.0140000000001,"body":"I just mean the fact that we don't like it."},{"startTime":1101.0140000000001,"endTime":1102.534,"body":"I haven't seen Wicked yet."},{"startTime":1102.534,"endTime":1105.554,"body":"on record, could go see it love it."},{"startTime":1105.554,"endTime":1106.2340000000002,"body":"And maybe I will."},{"startTime":1106.2340000000002,"endTime":1108.06,"body":"I'm going to probably see it this weekend."},{"startTime":1109.001,"endTime":1114.864,"body":"And I'm on record as saying, look, don't change anything about, if you were gonna see it,"},{"startTime":1109.001,"endTime":1114.864,"body":"go see it."},{"startTime":1114.905,"endTime":1122.089,"body":"If you were not gonna go see it, also use this as like further evidence that you don't"},{"startTime":1114.905,"endTime":1122.089,"body":"need to go see Wicked."},{"startTime":1122.089,"endTime":1124.91,"body":"But if you were gonna go see it, you're still gonna go see it."},{"startTime":1124.91,"endTime":1127.512,"body":"So what I'm saying is, Mike, I don't think we've lost anybody."},{"startTime":1128.0520000000001,"endTime":1129.7530000000002,"body":"Maybe they just think I'm an asshole."},{"startTime":1132.7540000000001,"endTime":1135.756,"body":"We'll see it in the Spotify comments, which by the way are turned on now."},{"startTime":1135.756,"endTime":1140.96,"body":"I didn't realize that like, would get these notifications, like you've got Spotify"},{"startTime":1135.756,"endTime":1140.96,"body":"comments and I go try to find them and I couldn't find them."},{"startTime":1140.96,"endTime":1149.675,"body":"But then when I went to go see our like Spotify wrapped for the podcast, it's like, you've"},{"startTime":1140.96,"endTime":1149.675,"body":"got you, so many people commented during the year."},{"startTime":1149.675,"endTime":1155.299,"body":"And I went like where, and so I went to a section which had all the comments and I had to"},{"startTime":1149.675,"endTime":1155.299,"body":"like approve them."},{"startTime":1155.299,"endTime":1156.237,"body":"But then I switched the thing."},{"startTime":1156.237,"endTime":1156.97,"body":"We're like, no, I don't want it."},{"startTime":1156.97,"endTime":1158.021,"body":"I don't need to approve the comments."},{"startTime":1158.021,"endTime":1160.853,"body":"So by the way, if you comment on this episode, it will just pop up."},{"startTime":1160.853,"endTime":1162.332,"body":"I don't need to approve it anymore."},{"startTime":1162.332,"endTime":1166.585,"body":"but there were some delightful comments that we'd missed over the year."},{"startTime":1167.0610000000001,"endTime":1170.386,"body":"I'm, it, can you send them to, I have no idea."},{"startTime":1170.386,"endTime":1174.531,"body":"When you sent that to me this morning, I was like, there are comments on Spotify?"},{"startTime":1174.531,"endTime":1179.207,"body":"Like, I don't know, I don't know how I would go comment on a thing on Spotify."},{"startTime":1179.762,"endTime":1183.462,"body":"as you can do it now, just do it at the end or just at the bottom."},{"startTime":1183.462,"endTime":1185.5420000000001,"body":"You just type in a little comment."},{"startTime":1185.942,"endTime":1187.702,"body":"It's a great thing."},{"startTime":1188.8220000000001,"endTime":1197.5420000000001,"body":"I don't think you can comment on songs, but could you imagine what would be with the"},{"startTime":1188.8220000000001,"endTime":1197.5420000000001,"body":"comments under a Taylor Swift song?"},{"startTime":1198.453,"endTime":1200.265,"body":"Dude, it would break."},{"startTime":1200.265,"endTime":1201.698,"body":"That's yeah."},{"startTime":1201.698,"endTime":1205.7530000000002,"body":"No wonder they don't allow comments under songs because it would, the internet would break"},{"startTime":1201.698,"endTime":1205.7530000000002,"body":"down."},{"startTime":1205.7530000000002,"endTime":1208.4260000000002,"body":"would be like, Hey, we ran out of internet."},{"startTime":1208.647,"endTime":1213.7,"body":"There's too many comments on the Taylor Swift songs and we're out of, we're completely out"},{"startTime":1208.647,"endTime":1213.7,"body":"of internet now."},{"startTime":1213.7,"endTime":1221.018,"body":"All the server farms everywhere would just be filled with comments on Taylor Swift's"},{"startTime":1213.7,"endTime":1221.018,"body":"songs."},{"startTime":1222.387,"endTime":1223.6380000000001,"body":"Wait, ran out."},{"startTime":1224.599,"endTime":1230.875,"body":"Yeah, Taylor Swift, she just has so many goddamn songs that people kept commenting on them"},{"startTime":1224.599,"endTime":1230.875,"body":"like, no, I think this one's actually her best one."},{"startTime":1230.875,"endTime":1231.9560000000001,"body":"No, you're full of shit."},{"startTime":1231.9560000000001,"endTime":1233.308,"body":"The other one's her best one."},{"startTime":1233.308,"endTime":1235.429,"body":"That's what it would just be people fighting."},{"startTime":1238.104,"endTime":1239.698,"body":"man."},{"startTime":1240.583,"endTime":1243.0710000000001,"body":"So I want to talk about a couple of experiences that we've had recently."},{"startTime":1243.0710000000001,"endTime":1243.717,"body":"Is that cool?"},{"startTime":1243.717,"endTime":1244.348,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":1244.348,"endTime":1245.429,"body":"was like, where do we go from here?"},{"startTime":1245.429,"endTime":1247.3500000000001,"body":"we want to break?"},{"startTime":1248.993,"endTime":1249.853,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":1250.375,"endTime":1252.1970000000001,"body":"Let's go out to the lobby."},{"startTime":1252.1970000000001,"endTime":1252.877,"body":"Let's go."},{"startTime":1252.877,"endTime":1255.079,"body":"getting a little distracting to anybody else's?"},{"startTime":1256.981,"endTime":1259.021,"body":"Like I'm such an asshole in the theater."},{"startTime":1259.0610000000001,"endTime":1267.8110000000001,"body":"I truly, if someone brings out their phone for a nanosecond in a movie theater, I'm like,"},{"startTime":1259.0610000000001,"endTime":1267.8110000000001,"body":"all right, bro, step outside."},{"startTime":1267.8110000000001,"endTime":1273.141,"body":"I'm going to like do the old timey thing of like rolling up my sleeves and like putting up"},{"startTime":1267.8110000000001,"endTime":1273.141,"body":"my dukes."},{"startTime":1273.141,"endTime":1276.8410000000001,"body":"the fighting Irish guy, the Notre Dame mascot."},{"startTime":1276.8410000000001,"endTime":1286.2150000000001,"body":"Like if I see a light, like if I see a light for less than one tenth of one hundredth of"},{"startTime":1276.8410000000001,"endTime":1286.2150000000001,"body":"one second."},{"startTime":1286.2150000000001,"endTime":1288.678,"body":"I am instantly like, get this piece of shit out of here."},{"startTime":1288.678,"endTime":1290.674,"body":"Get him out of here right away."},{"startTime":1291.192,"endTime":1292.712,"body":"Well, you've killed the dream."},{"startTime":1292.712,"endTime":1294.874,"body":"You've woken up from, know, the..."},{"startTime":1295.154,"endTime":1298.4180000000001,"body":"Nicole Kidman, you would say, probably."},{"startTime":1298.4180000000001,"endTime":1304.304,"body":"I am trying to enjoy this silver screen and people are like lighting up their little mini"},{"startTime":1298.4180000000001,"endTime":1304.304,"body":"screens."},{"startTime":1304.304,"endTime":1310.559,"body":"You've ruined the magic of the silver screen and Nicole Kidman would be ashamed of you."},{"startTime":1310.559,"endTime":1317.496,"body":"How are me and Nicole Kidman supposed to suspend our disbelief if you idiots keep on"},{"startTime":1310.559,"endTime":1317.496,"body":"pulling your phones out in movies?"},{"startTime":1318.338,"endTime":1321.481,"body":"We're trying to wa- Nicole and I are trying to watch a movie here!"},{"startTime":1321.97,"endTime":1323.82,"body":"Well, that's why Nicole gets her private theater."},{"startTime":1323.82,"endTime":1326.15,"body":"That's what she does."},{"startTime":1326.51,"endTime":1327.184,"body":"She's good."},{"startTime":1327.184,"endTime":1333.275,"body":"it's the one, it's the one little diva thing that I do, but I ran out entire movie"},{"startTime":1327.184,"endTime":1333.275,"body":"theaters because I just love movies so much."},{"startTime":1333.275,"endTime":1334.9360000000001,"body":"And they're like, well, can we film this?"},{"startTime":1334.9360000000001,"endTime":1336.136,"body":"This sounds like a great commercial."},{"startTime":1336.136,"endTime":1343.9180000000001,"body":"She's like, I only agree to you filming this if the only time somebody can see this"},{"startTime":1336.136,"endTime":1343.9180000000001,"body":"commercial is if they're in the movie theater."},{"startTime":1343.9180000000001,"endTime":1353.251,"body":"Like I, it matters so much to me that I only want people who share my love of watching"},{"startTime":1343.9180000000001,"endTime":1353.251,"body":"movies in the movie theater to see me watching movies in the movie theater."},{"startTime":1354.298,"endTime":1355.663,"body":"I mean, genius."},{"startTime":1355.663,"endTime":1359.034,"body":"But what are these experiences you're talking about?"},{"startTime":1359.034,"endTime":1360.599,"body":"Sorry, I'm just getting us on track."},{"startTime":1360.599,"endTime":1363.007,"body":"sorry, Are we on a time?"},{"startTime":1363.007,"endTime":1364.221,"body":"Are we on a crunch here?"},{"startTime":1364.221,"endTime":1365.7150000000001,"body":"Do we have a schedule?"},{"startTime":1367.3880000000001,"endTime":1369.309,"body":"No, I just realized I didn't have anything to say."},{"startTime":1369.309,"endTime":1378.114,"body":"If anyone out there is wondering, how does Mike express when he's tired of Doug's shit?"},{"startTime":1378.2340000000002,"endTime":1379.4550000000002,"body":"You just heard it."},{"startTime":1379.4550000000002,"endTime":1381.886,"body":"Like that, it just happened."},{"startTime":1381.886,"endTime":1383.377,"body":"All right, Doug, move along."},{"startTime":1383.377,"endTime":1384.297,"body":"What's the next thing?"},{"startTime":1384.297,"endTime":1385.8980000000001,"body":"Like, what are you really trying to say here?"},{"startTime":1385.8980000000001,"endTime":1387.9,"body":"Because you're now tirading about Nicole Kidman."},{"startTime":1387.9,"endTime":1389.7,"body":"All right, here's what want to talk about."},{"startTime":1391.982,"endTime":1398.2050000000002,"body":"So you have to speak to your own experiences, but you were doing an experience the same"},{"startTime":1391.982,"endTime":1398.2050000000002,"body":"night that I was like..."},{"startTime":1398.6870000000001,"endTime":1402.098,"body":"trying to bundle up for a good old, like a good old winter's nap."},{"startTime":1402.098,"endTime":1402.6770000000001,"body":"Right."},{"startTime":1402.6770000000001,"endTime":1404.737,"body":"I got a little high."},{"startTime":1404.737,"endTime":1417.4950000000001,"body":"I got a little ketamine in me and then all hell broke loose where there was a blizzard"},{"startTime":1404.737,"endTime":1417.4950000000001,"body":"going on outside and children, children were driving past my house to come like they were"},{"startTime":1417.4950000000001,"endTime":1420.9260000000002,"body":"driving to my house to come hang out with my kids."},{"startTime":1421.666,"endTime":1428.329,"body":"And suddenly my daughter comes running in panicked and she's like, my friend just went off"},{"startTime":1421.666,"endTime":1428.329,"body":"the road and it's like,"},{"startTime":1428.329,"endTime":1430.69,"body":"tuck in the ravine."},{"startTime":1431.371,"endTime":1433.192,"body":"And I was like, wait a here."},{"startTime":1433.192,"endTime":1434.102,"body":"Is this really happening?"},{"startTime":1434.102,"endTime":1434.803,"body":"Like what's going on?"},{"startTime":1434.803,"endTime":1437.654,"body":"Is this really happening or am I just tripping?"},{"startTime":1437.834,"endTime":1444.277,"body":"And so I had to like bundle up and go out and I'm telling you Mike, that was an"},{"startTime":1437.834,"endTime":1444.277,"body":"experience."},{"startTime":1444.277,"endTime":1454.684,"body":"Doing that when I was in that state of mind, like getting in my, like I had to pull people"},{"startTime":1444.277,"endTime":1454.684,"body":"out of the ditch basically, cause there's this whole snowstorm going on."},{"startTime":1454.704,"endTime":1456.945,"body":"And I'm happy to say that I was."},{"startTime":1456.945,"endTime":1458.9660000000001,"body":"not incapacitated enough."},{"startTime":1459.047,"endTime":1468.973,"body":"it made me learn a really valuable lesson of like, look, man, you've kind of taken for"},{"startTime":1459.047,"endTime":1468.973,"body":"granted the concepts of set and setting."},{"startTime":1468.973,"endTime":1470.785,"body":"That's the first thing that we ever talked about."},{"startTime":1470.785,"endTime":1474.457,"body":"Remember when we were so worried when we started this podcast, we were talking about like"},{"startTime":1470.785,"endTime":1474.457,"body":"safety."},{"startTime":1474.457,"endTime":1479.077,"body":"We were talking about doing it like in safe places with safe people."},{"startTime":1479.077,"endTime":1481.602,"body":"We were talking about like planning ahead."},{"startTime":1481.602,"endTime":1486.535,"body":"And then sometimes it's like, I need a little reminder to be like, dude, you can't just"},{"startTime":1481.602,"endTime":1486.535,"body":"willy nilly."},{"startTime":1487.406,"endTime":1488.659,"body":"get going on this type of stuff."},{"startTime":1488.659,"endTime":1491.535,"body":"It's been a good, it's actually been really good for me ever since then."},{"startTime":1491.6760000000002,"endTime":1500.428,"body":"think this is a good, maybe we have a chat about this because, you know, I've reflected a"},{"startTime":1491.6760000000002,"endTime":1500.428,"body":"lot on various relationship to substances lately."},{"startTime":1501.6490000000001,"endTime":1504.029,"body":"I did it because I did, and I can talk about my experience."},{"startTime":1504.029,"endTime":1511.848,"body":"I did a, Bufo experience and leading up to it, there's a Dieta that he wanted four days."},{"startTime":1511.848,"endTime":1515.092,"body":"I did a solid three maybe."},{"startTime":1515.432,"endTime":1521.614,"body":"Or maybe they wanted like five days, but like had some things, you know, holiday things"},{"startTime":1515.432,"endTime":1521.614,"body":"the weekend and you know."},{"startTime":1522.351,"endTime":1533.017,"body":"so I didn't, but I did a solid three days and realizing how different substances affect"},{"startTime":1522.351,"endTime":1533.017,"body":"me."},{"startTime":1533.017,"endTime":1536.118,"body":"even, even, we'll even start with coffee."},{"startTime":1536.159,"endTime":1538.96,"body":"Like, the word on Mormons on mushrooms."},{"startTime":1538.96,"endTime":1545.684,"body":"And I know we laugh at the silliness of the word of wisdom and going to hell for drinking"},{"startTime":1538.96,"endTime":1545.684,"body":"a cup of coffee."},{"startTime":1547.646,"endTime":1548.826,"body":"but like,"},{"startTime":1549.027,"endTime":1556.708,"body":"I wish by the way I know Mormons would balk at that statement going to help her but not"},{"startTime":1549.027,"endTime":1556.708,"body":"being able to get a temple recommend for drinking a cup of coffee."},{"startTime":1557.348,"endTime":1558.472,"body":"not adhering to the word of wisdom."},{"startTime":1558.472,"endTime":1560.679,"body":"That is a temple recommend question."},{"startTime":1560.679,"endTime":1568.1970000000001,"body":"and most bishops would, I mean, most bishops, when I was in the church, maybe it's changed"},{"startTime":1560.679,"endTime":1568.1970000000001,"body":"now, but most bishops, if you told them you were drinking coffee, would not give you a"},{"startTime":1568.1970000000001,"endTime":1569.328,"body":"temple recommend."},{"startTime":1572.615,"endTime":1577.877,"body":"I typically drink two cups a day."},{"startTime":1577.877,"endTime":1580.598,"body":"I'll drink one in the morning and then one after lunch."},{"startTime":1581.539,"endTime":1585.72,"body":"And sometimes in the weekends, if it's after a night of drinking, I'll have three."},{"startTime":1586.641,"endTime":1591.082,"body":"So a fair amount, but like not crazy amount."},{"startTime":1591.323,"endTime":1597.525,"body":"But even with that, I was so tired the next day."},{"startTime":1597.805,"endTime":1599.126,"body":"So tired when I..."},{"startTime":1599.352,"endTime":1600.0520000000001,"body":"gave up coffee."},{"startTime":1600.0520000000001,"endTime":1602.654,"body":"And this happens to me anytime I'm about to do a ceremony and get off it."},{"startTime":1602.654,"endTime":1610.999,"body":"Like, I know I'm going to have the next day, I'm probably going have some headaches, I'm"},{"startTime":1602.654,"endTime":1610.999,"body":"just going to be exhausted, but then I'm going to feel relaxed and I'm going to sleep"},{"startTime":1610.999,"endTime":1611.829,"body":"well."},{"startTime":1611.989,"endTime":1616.972,"body":"And realizing how much caffeine is a..."},{"startTime":1617.713,"endTime":1618.613,"body":"It's..."},{"startTime":1619.7340000000002,"endTime":1621.175,"body":"We don't use it with intention."},{"startTime":1621.175,"endTime":1627.058,"body":"We use it with the intention of, shit, we got to get up and work every fucking day, you"},{"startTime":1621.175,"endTime":1627.058,"body":"five days a week."},{"startTime":1627.1380000000001,"endTime":1631.661,"body":"And so it's the, it's a fuel for capitalism in a way."},{"startTime":1632.122,"endTime":1636.9260000000002,"body":"It's to get us in like this doing state instead of being state."},{"startTime":1638.367,"endTime":1644.692,"body":"Not that I'm not, it's just, but I want to be more mindful of when I drink a cup of coffee"},{"startTime":1638.367,"endTime":1644.692,"body":"now."},{"startTime":1644.893,"endTime":1650.457,"body":"And when I'm, you know, and I want to use even drink caffeine more intentionally."},{"startTime":1651.038,"endTime":1654.971,"body":"Where if it's like, yeah, I do want to be productive for this next few hours."},{"startTime":1654.971,"endTime":1655.622,"body":"Okay."},{"startTime":1655.622,"endTime":1656.382,"body":"Or."},{"startTime":1656.654,"endTime":1665.279,"body":"Or if I'm just out with someone like, hey, a cup of coffee sounds nice today, kind of"},{"startTime":1656.654,"endTime":1665.279,"body":"deal, but not make it a part of my morning ritual."},{"startTime":1665.279,"endTime":1667.4270000000001,"body":"And I'm not saying this is, everyone should follow this."},{"startTime":1667.4270000000001,"endTime":1670.521,"body":"I'm just saying this is just my relationship to coffee at the moment."},{"startTime":1671.3020000000001,"endTime":1678.326,"body":"So it's even made me, so even to coffee, it's made me kind of rethink some things, but"},{"startTime":1671.3020000000001,"endTime":1678.326,"body":"then I started going through other things."},{"startTime":1678.326,"endTime":1683.1480000000001,"body":"You we've talked about like our love hate relationship with alcohol."},{"startTime":1683.3890000000001,"endTime":1686.298,"body":"I think overall it's been a net benefit."},{"startTime":1686.298,"endTime":1700.948,"body":"in my life, but it's like, it's, there's been times when it hasn't, but you know, overall,"},{"startTime":1686.298,"endTime":1700.948,"body":"think as a, so it just the, the amount of cool, fun experiences I've had with drinking,"},{"startTime":1700.948,"endTime":1710.194,"body":"the amount of social connection I've had with drinking the, I think alcohol helped me get"},{"startTime":1700.948,"endTime":1710.194,"body":"in touch with my grief that I'd been suppressing for a long time."},{"startTime":1712.636,"endTime":1714.267,"body":"but it's also has its dark side."},{"startTime":1714.267,"endTime":1716.198,"body":"And so it's."},{"startTime":1716.976,"endTime":1725.1190000000001,"body":"You know, we've talked about that relationship and I would put ketamine somewhere on that"},{"startTime":1716.976,"endTime":1725.1190000000001,"body":"spectrum ish of like."},{"startTime":1725.1190000000001,"endTime":1726.277,"body":"Yeah, same."},{"startTime":1727.126,"endTime":1738.803,"body":"of I think ketamine can be so effective and so I mean, as a dissociative, it can be so"},{"startTime":1727.126,"endTime":1738.803,"body":"helpful in helping people experience emotions that they would not normally want to"},{"startTime":1738.803,"endTime":1742.055,"body":"experience because you're too in it."},{"startTime":1742.055,"endTime":1747.518,"body":"then but then when you get that little bit of separation, it's like, shit, I can feel this"},{"startTime":1742.055,"endTime":1747.518,"body":"now and I'm okay feeling it."},{"startTime":1747.518,"endTime":1754.192,"body":"And and I think ketamine for music, any like medicine,"},{"startTime":1754.256,"endTime":1763.592,"body":"to tune into music, but ketamine has like this vibration that just like helps me with"},{"startTime":1754.256,"endTime":1763.592,"body":"music and songwriting and singing so, so much."},{"startTime":1764.493,"endTime":1774.579,"body":"And yet I find that even on nights when I have like these deep insights with ketamine, the"},{"startTime":1764.493,"endTime":1774.579,"body":"next day, it doesn't really stay with me as much."},{"startTime":1774.98,"endTime":1778.5620000000001,"body":"Like, like similar to alcohol where it's like the next day you just feel like a headache."},{"startTime":1778.5620000000001,"endTime":1784.262,"body":"I don't really necessarily feel a headache with ketamine, but I don't really, that feeling"},{"startTime":1778.5620000000001,"endTime":1784.262,"body":"doesn't stay."},{"startTime":1784.262,"endTime":1788.39,"body":"And sometimes those insights don't carry over and I want to just go in again."},{"startTime":1790.106,"endTime":1791.553,"body":"And it, yeah."},{"startTime":1792.575,"endTime":1793.185,"body":"Sorry."},{"startTime":1793.185,"endTime":1793.656,"body":"Yeah, sorry."},{"startTime":1793.656,"endTime":1796.517,"body":"I'm not trying to interrupt your train of thought."},{"startTime":1796.517,"endTime":1808.7740000000001,"body":"just, there's something interesting there about as you're, as you're talking about this"},{"startTime":1796.517,"endTime":1808.7740000000001,"body":"things I'm thinking of, I'm thinking about, if your body like lit, you know how it's like,"},{"startTime":1808.914,"endTime":1809.954,"body":"listen to your body."},{"startTime":1809.954,"endTime":1814.017,"body":"Like I always keep having to learn these stupid lessons."},{"startTime":1814.017,"endTime":1815.237,"body":"Do you know what I mean?"},{"startTime":1815.8780000000002,"endTime":1822.281,"body":"And it's like, if your body is protesting, you know, so you think about like hangovers,"},{"startTime":1815.8780000000002,"endTime":1822.281,"body":"you know, out with alcohol."},{"startTime":1822.373,"endTime":1831.586,"body":"or coffee's a really good one to talk about because it's like, I, you mentioned having a"},{"startTime":1822.373,"endTime":1831.586,"body":"cup of coffee in the morning and then having a cup of coffee like maybe after lunch or"},{"startTime":1831.586,"endTime":1832.536,"body":"something like that."},{"startTime":1832.536,"endTime":1838.338,"body":"If I have coffee after like the hour of noon, I can't sleep, dude."},{"startTime":1838.338,"endTime":1840.829,"body":"I cannot go to sleep."},{"startTime":1840.829,"endTime":1848.903,"body":"And so it's like listening to my body suddenly becomes like a, again, like I said, I..."},{"startTime":1848.903,"endTime":1856.409,"body":"I get that everybody knows these lessons and I keep having to learn them because I'm so"},{"startTime":1848.903,"endTime":1856.409,"body":"stubborn about learning these types of things."},{"startTime":1856.409,"endTime":1869.05,"body":"But if your body is shutting down after alcohol and you're having these day-long hangovers"},{"startTime":1856.409,"endTime":1869.05,"body":"or whatever, maybe that's my body saying, hey, Doug, let's change our relationship with"},{"startTime":1869.05,"endTime":1869.851,"body":"alcohol."},{"startTime":1869.851,"endTime":1871.652,"body":"Same with ketamine."},{"startTime":1871.652,"endTime":1877.797,"body":"If I'm having the next day when you're in the morning, there's almost that ketamine fog"},{"startTime":1871.652,"endTime":1877.797,"body":"type of thing and it's like..."},{"startTime":1878.259,"endTime":1882.373,"body":"Maybe that's my body being like, bro, enough's enough with this shit."},{"startTime":1882.373,"endTime":1884.314,"body":"Like be more mindful."},{"startTime":1884.314,"endTime":1893.5420000000001,"body":"And we've only named three things, but it's also like, what am I getting at the, I talk"},{"startTime":1884.314,"endTime":1893.5420000000001,"body":"openly about the Maverick being my favorite restaurant."},{"startTime":1893.5420000000001,"endTime":1894.586,"body":"What am I getting at the Maverick?"},{"startTime":1894.586,"endTime":1895.594,"body":"Where does that food come from?"},{"startTime":1895.594,"endTime":1896.815,"body":"And am I just pouring it in there?"},{"startTime":1896.815,"endTime":1901.049,"body":"Cause it's like, okay, let's fuel, let's fuel it and it tastes good and let's get moving."},{"startTime":1901.049,"endTime":1902.509,"body":"Or am I doing it?"},{"startTime":1902.63,"endTime":1905.732,"body":"Cause I'm listening to my body and it's like, okay, well."},{"startTime":1907.113,"endTime":1915.16,"body":"there's probably people out there that would be like, listen, Doug, if you really listen"},{"startTime":1907.113,"endTime":1915.16,"body":"to your body, there's no time ever that it would be like, how about a burrito from"},{"startTime":1915.16,"endTime":1916.14,"body":"Maverick?"},{"startTime":1916.8010000000002,"endTime":1921.265,"body":"How about a, how about crushing a couple of big old juicy hot dogs from the Maverick?"},{"startTime":1921.505,"endTime":1923.627,"body":"Your body would be like, no thanks bro."},{"startTime":1924.248,"endTime":1925.3880000000001,"body":"on my watch."},{"startTime":1925.409,"endTime":1935.6970000000001,"body":"Anyway, so that back to what you were talking about about like, a re visiting or, or, or"},{"startTime":1925.409,"endTime":1935.6970000000001,"body":"being open to looking at."},{"startTime":1936.403,"endTime":1941.498,"body":"my relationship with substances is something that's been heavy on my mind a lot lately, is"},{"startTime":1936.403,"endTime":1941.498,"body":"what I'm trying to say."},{"startTime":1941.498,"endTime":1941.9080000000001,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":1941.9080000000001,"endTime":1946.401,"body":"And am I using them like you were talking about that set and setting?"},{"startTime":1947.502,"endTime":1956.709,"body":"I mean, with the name warmens on mushrooms, I, I, I do feel like mushrooms and of course,"},{"startTime":1947.502,"endTime":1956.709,"body":"every time, you know, we've talked about them, we talk about the importance of set and"},{"startTime":1956.709,"endTime":1966.355,"body":"setting the importance of like, checking if they're right for you first, you know, a"},{"startTime":1956.709,"endTime":1966.355,"body":"history of mental health in your family and, and, and, know, all the different precautions"},{"startTime":1966.355,"endTime":1967.396,"body":"around it."},{"startTime":1967.6960000000001,"endTime":1970.498,"body":"But overall, I feel like the net benefit."},{"startTime":1970.578,"endTime":1986.284,"body":"of mushrooms far outweighs the risk and the potential downfalls of them on a scale that"},{"startTime":1970.578,"endTime":1986.284,"body":"dwarfs any of these other, especially alcohol that we're talking about."},{"startTime":1987.145,"endTime":1990.797,"body":"And then I feel like a lot of the other ones kind of fall on some different spectrum."},{"startTime":1990.797,"endTime":1996.3890000000001,"body":"I feel mostly that way with doing an ayahuasca ceremony."},{"startTime":1996.3890000000001,"endTime":1999.1100000000001,"body":"I think more..."},{"startTime":2000.164,"endTime":2007.1190000000001,"body":"It's more likely the overwhelming good over the risk is astra is enormous."},{"startTime":2007.47,"endTime":2008.971,"body":"especially in the right setting."},{"startTime":2008.971,"endTime":2017.4080000000001,"body":"I know I've heard some horror stories in different Iowas, you know, when people, different"},{"startTime":2008.971,"endTime":2017.4080000000001,"body":"shamans are just shady and shady shit going on."},{"startTime":2017.4080000000001,"endTime":2028.117,"body":"like, if you're with a reputable shaman and, and people know how to care for your psyche,"},{"startTime":2017.4080000000001,"endTime":2028.117,"body":"you're in, you're in, you're in good hands that way, which I've been in every one of the"},{"startTime":2028.117,"endTime":2029.497,"body":"ceremonies I've done."},{"startTime":2031.28,"endTime":2035.112,"body":"Like, yeah, it's life-changing."},{"startTime":2037.914,"endTime":2045.4080000000001,"body":"and I like that even, you know, tuning into, what I found, so I haven't been drinking"},{"startTime":2037.914,"endTime":2045.4080000000001,"body":"coffee these last couple of weeks, even after my Bufo ceremony."},{"startTime":2045.4080000000001,"endTime":2055.866,"body":"And I've been doing, I've switched it to chai tea, which is, which has caffeine, but it's"},{"startTime":2045.4080000000001,"endTime":2055.866,"body":"like, you know, it's like starting the day with 40 milligrams of caffeine instead of 120."},{"startTime":2055.866,"endTime":2058.065,"body":"So you don't have that crash as much."},{"startTime":2058.065,"endTime":2059.8849999999998,"body":"I'm sleeping better at night."},{"startTime":2061.284,"endTime":2074.707,"body":"And I'm also realizing because I'm not amped up on caffeine, I'm not craving alcohol at"},{"startTime":2061.284,"endTime":2074.707,"body":"night to like bring me back down from like this, you know?"},{"startTime":2076.69,"endTime":2085.218,"body":"And I don't know, I've been feeling really good lately and I kind of want to keep it"},{"startTime":2076.69,"endTime":2085.218,"body":"going, you know?"},{"startTime":2085.62,"endTime":2086.98,"body":"Yeah, I hear that."},{"startTime":2086.98,"endTime":2100.22,"body":"the, I, using Ayahuasca is a really good, to me, it's like an amazing, it's a perfect"},{"startTime":2086.98,"endTime":2100.22,"body":"example because you know, doing Ayahuasca is like, got to, well, even you just did Bufo."},{"startTime":2100.22,"endTime":2101.06,"body":"It's a good example."},{"startTime":2101.06,"endTime":2103.09,"body":"You have to prep for it."},{"startTime":2103.09,"endTime":2109.4399999999996,"body":"And then you've got to set aside time where it's like, look, I, I am going to be"},{"startTime":2103.09,"endTime":2109.4399999999996,"body":"unavailable."},{"startTime":2109.4399999999996,"endTime":2113.66,"body":"I I'm going to be completely unavailable during this amount of time."},{"startTime":2113.66,"endTime":2115.629,"body":"And then you've got the."},{"startTime":2116.189,"endTime":2126.102,"body":"the experience itself and then the integration and the, you know, the days leading after,"},{"startTime":2116.189,"endTime":2126.102,"body":"I or the days after it where it's like new perspectives or, or leaving just like a"},{"startTime":2126.102,"endTime":2136.9449999999997,"body":"softening of some perspectives and you're journaling and like, I was cause not just some"},{"startTime":2126.102,"endTime":2136.9449999999997,"body":"willy nilly thing that you just do, you know, like, like you wouldn't, you know, we, tell"},{"startTime":2136.9449999999997,"endTime":2144.807,"body":"a story about our night, that whiskey street and then go into the reggae festival and"},{"startTime":2136.9449999999997,"endTime":2144.807,"body":"doing mushrooms and it changed our whole life."},{"startTime":2145.109,"endTime":2148.08,"body":"but you wouldn't have that experience where it's just like on a whim."},{"startTime":2148.08,"endTime":2150.1499999999996,"body":"You're like, let's do ayahuasca."},{"startTime":2150.1499999999996,"endTime":2150.8509999999997,"body":"Do you know what I mean?"},{"startTime":2150.8509999999997,"endTime":2154.712,"body":"It's, it's so, it's like, so it's such as like an intentional thing."},{"startTime":2154.712,"endTime":2163.614,"body":"And there's like the ceremony surrounding it and the, and the sacredness surrounding it,"},{"startTime":2154.712,"endTime":2163.614,"body":"where it really does lead to these amazing, incredible experiences."},{"startTime":2163.614,"endTime":2171.806,"body":"And it's like you said, there are, there are charlatans and snake oil salesman out there"},{"startTime":2163.614,"endTime":2171.806,"body":"that, that, do ayahuasca, know, that are like, Hey, come by and I'll serve you some"},{"startTime":2171.806,"endTime":2172.796,"body":"ayahuasca."},{"startTime":2172.937,"endTime":2174.567,"body":"But I'm just, it's just,"},{"startTime":2174.6949999999997,"endTime":2182.768,"body":"Using ayahuasca as sort of like a bellwether for all this is really good because it's"},{"startTime":2174.6949999999997,"endTime":2182.768,"body":"like, there are times when I'll just be like, yeah, I'm just kind of in the zone and I"},{"startTime":2182.768,"endTime":2186.611,"body":"might just have a little bit, you know, I'm just might have a little bit ketamine or"},{"startTime":2182.768,"endTime":2186.611,"body":"something like that."},{"startTime":2188.372,"endTime":2192.575,"body":"I smoked some weed, but it wouldn't be fun to just smoke some more weed."},{"startTime":2192.575,"endTime":2193.225,"body":"you know what I mean?"},{"startTime":2193.225,"endTime":2201.009,"body":"It's just like, and then it becomes the thing that I'm just doing to do rather than to"},{"startTime":2193.225,"endTime":2201.009,"body":"figure out what's, how's it speaking to me?"},{"startTime":2201.009,"endTime":2203.16,"body":"What effect is it having on my body?"},{"startTime":2203.16,"endTime":2204.5969999999998,"body":"What effect is it having on my mind?"},{"startTime":2204.5969999999998,"endTime":2208.299,"body":"What is it is impacting my life in different ways?"},{"startTime":2208.299,"endTime":2220.444,"body":"And so all of this to say, like, I'm always looking for something to to feel guilty about"},{"startTime":2208.299,"endTime":2220.444,"body":"or feel that I'm not I'm not I'm not doing enough or I'm not I'm not living up to some"},{"startTime":2220.444,"endTime":2221.504,"body":"expectation."},{"startTime":2221.504,"endTime":2230.428,"body":"This is the one that I'm this is the one that I'm choosing to the path that I'm going down"},{"startTime":2221.504,"endTime":2230.428,"body":"right now is like, OK, man, you got to pull your shit together because if it's not that"},{"startTime":2230.428,"endTime":2231.6279999999997,"body":"it's going to be another thing for me."},{"startTime":2231.6279999999997,"endTime":2232.656,"body":"Do you know what mean?"},{"startTime":2232.656,"endTime":2238.187,"body":"Yeah, and it's okay to be in a pendulum, you know, every now and then."},{"startTime":2239.486,"endTime":2243.5989999999997,"body":"I mean, even with Canvas, I haven't been doing much Canvas lately."},{"startTime":2243.5989999999997,"endTime":2247.54,"body":"And I've been dreaming a lot."},{"startTime":2247.54,"endTime":2248.6099999999997,"body":"So my dreams have come back."},{"startTime":2248.6099999999997,"endTime":2250.0609999999997,"body":"Like for a while there, I wasn't dreaming."},{"startTime":2250.0609999999997,"endTime":2252.4109999999996,"body":"And so it's been fun to work with my dreams again."},{"startTime":2252.5119999999997,"endTime":2256.2929999999997,"body":"But you know, I've been trying to write this Christmas album before Christmas."},{"startTime":2258.0919999999996,"endTime":2259.839,"body":"And I mean, I'm loving them."},{"startTime":2259.839,"endTime":2260.9139999999998,"body":"Yeah, loving it."},{"startTime":2260.9139999999998,"endTime":2263.334,"body":"I know, but it's kind of stalled a little bit."},{"startTime":2264.334,"endTime":2272.354,"body":"And then one night, like a few nights ago, I hit a vape pen pretty hard."},{"startTime":2272.734,"endTime":2275.834,"body":"And all of a sudden it's like, there's the inspiration."},{"startTime":2275.834,"endTime":2279.4739999999997,"body":"all of a sudden stuff starts..."},{"startTime":2279.4739999999997,"endTime":2285.4139999999998,"body":"Like these blocks, it's like my creative blocks went out the window."},{"startTime":2285.4139999999998,"endTime":2287.124,"body":"But then I wasn't working on the Christmas songs."},{"startTime":2287.124,"endTime":2289.0339999999997,"body":"You know what I ended up doing?"},{"startTime":2290.008,"endTime":2291.919,"body":"your songs came to mind."},{"startTime":2292.3999999999996,"endTime":2302.2079999999996,"body":"And so I started, I played through like a half a dozen of your songs and some of them in"},{"startTime":2292.3999999999996,"endTime":2302.2079999999996,"body":"like just different ways."},{"startTime":2303.589,"endTime":2312.176,"body":"Like your mother song, I just started singing almost like a whole new tune, which I'm"},{"startTime":2303.589,"endTime":2312.176,"body":"like, this is, think is a whole new."},{"startTime":2312.176,"endTime":2315.149,"body":"So now I'm trying to take that tune and write new lyrics to it."},{"startTime":2315.149,"endTime":2319.078,"body":"I think it might actually be a Christmas song if I do it."},{"startTime":2320.4069999999997,"endTime":2330.4669999999996,"body":"But it all started with the chords to your mother's song and me singing it in like, in"},{"startTime":2320.4069999999997,"endTime":2330.4669999999996,"body":"whatever tune I was hearing because I couldn't, it was weird in that state."},{"startTime":2330.4669999999996,"endTime":2334.361,"body":"couldn't remember some things."},{"startTime":2334.361,"endTime":2339.8709999999996,"body":"Like I was, it was just, I had to sing it how it was coming out, you know, that goes"},{"startTime":2334.361,"endTime":2339.8709999999996,"body":"sometimes."},{"startTime":2339.8709999999996,"endTime":2340.942,"body":"dude, you're on that."},{"startTime":2340.942,"endTime":2349.2659999999996,"body":"Like you're really on that lately of, something that exists can spark inspiration and"},{"startTime":2340.942,"endTime":2349.2659999999996,"body":"birth something new."},{"startTime":2349.2659999999996,"endTime":2350.8869999999997,"body":"Like that's, that's the thing that we've talked about."},{"startTime":2350.8869999999997,"endTime":2353.018,"body":"think we've talked about on the podcast, but you and I have been talking about it."},{"startTime":2353.018,"endTime":2353.8489999999997,"body":"Definitely."},{"startTime":2353.8489999999997,"endTime":2358.711,"body":"Like you had that experience with David, you know, with David Gilmore, far as like the"},{"startTime":2353.8489999999997,"endTime":2358.711,"body":"Pink Floyd type of thing."},{"startTime":2359.0719999999997,"endTime":2365.625,"body":"So yeah, please, please use any and all of my songs to make something, you know, different"},{"startTime":2359.0719999999997,"endTime":2365.625,"body":"and better."},{"startTime":2365.625,"endTime":2367.3559999999998,"body":"And I, okay."},{"startTime":2367.3559999999998,"endTime":2368.877,"body":"I don't want to put it like a."},{"startTime":2369.225,"endTime":2373.4979999999996,"body":"I don't want to put that judgment on it, but you know what I'm saying, like to make more,"},{"startTime":2369.225,"endTime":2373.4979999999996,"body":"to make more."},{"startTime":2373.638,"endTime":2378.4109999999996,"body":"I mean, it could be the Bob Ross to your monopoly, but you know what I mean?"},{"startTime":2378.4109999999996,"endTime":2380.758,"body":"The Bob Ross version of it."},{"startTime":2382.564,"endTime":2385.796,"body":"You know, it does really get weird with that."},{"startTime":2385.796,"endTime":2393.692,"body":"know we talked about it in our last recording with Heretic, but we talked about it a lot"},{"startTime":2385.796,"endTime":2393.692,"body":"sense of just like that spark of creativity and how it sparks more."},{"startTime":2393.692,"endTime":2398.8149999999996,"body":"And then it's like, okay, but now I own this little spark that came out of me."},{"startTime":2398.8149999999996,"endTime":2402.1369999999997,"body":"But then what it's such a weird concept."},{"startTime":2403.16,"endTime":2404.5009999999997,"body":"music rights industry."},{"startTime":2404.5009999999997,"endTime":2408.0069999999996,"body":"get why, you we had a long conversation where I was like, just blow it all up."},{"startTime":2408.0069999999996,"endTime":2409.79,"body":"Let's just like, skip our music out."},{"startTime":2409.79,"endTime":2424.267,"body":"Let's set up a, like a group or like an exchange where people can just share music and"},{"startTime":2409.79,"endTime":2424.267,"body":"just like, build on each other's songs and change each other's songs."},{"startTime":2424.528,"endTime":2432.114,"body":"But I also get why, you know, in today's society and with in capitalism, you need to own"},{"startTime":2432.816,"endTime":2446.252,"body":"You, your art, but at the same time, it's such a weird concept to think, okay, now I own"},{"startTime":2432.816,"endTime":2446.252,"body":"this, but you know, so Neverland, for, for example, it, it came because I started playing"},{"startTime":2446.252,"endTime":2452.055,"body":"this song from a Brazilian band called a Legion Urbana."},{"startTime":2453.2549999999997,"endTime":2457.3489999999997,"body":"I'm, I can already hear my accent when I say that, but Legion Urbana."},{"startTime":2457.3489999999997,"endTime":2463.3999999999996,"body":"lucky for you, I cannot hear your accent, and that's all that I care about is what it"},{"startTime":2457.3489999999997,"endTime":2463.3999999999996,"body":"sounds like to me."},{"startTime":2463.926,"endTime":2474.1059999999998,"body":"like, it's OJ and OJ now ting luar tonight, or tonight, there's no moon and it's all about"},{"startTime":2463.926,"endTime":2474.1059999999998,"body":"like yearning for your love kind of dope."},{"startTime":2474.1059999999998,"endTime":2480.306,"body":"And I started strumming that, but I was strumming it differently, but it started with"},{"startTime":2474.1059999999998,"endTime":2480.306,"body":"their, the, the first three chords of their songs."},{"startTime":2480.306,"endTime":2484.566,"body":"That song became the first three chords to never land."},{"startTime":2484.566,"endTime":2491.2419999999997,"body":"Because all of a sudden I did an accidental strum because I felt a lot of time creativity"},{"startTime":2484.566,"endTime":2491.2419999999997,"body":"is."},{"startTime":2491.364,"endTime":2492.2039999999997,"body":"on the accident."},{"startTime":2492.2039999999997,"endTime":2493.6349999999998,"body":"mean, you think of like evolution."},{"startTime":2493.6349999999998,"endTime":2506.6879999999996,"body":"We evolved because some accident happened and then, you know, it's a whole thing about,"},{"startTime":2493.6349999999998,"endTime":2506.6879999999996,"body":"you know, a blackbird is a birth defect, but then it survives in the smog better in London"},{"startTime":2506.6879999999996,"endTime":2508.6189999999997,"body":"and then everything, you know, that kind of thing."},{"startTime":2509.6189999999997,"endTime":2516.6409999999996,"body":"Same thing with like, I find with songwriting, it's like a lot of times it's just you,"},{"startTime":2509.6189999999997,"endTime":2516.6409999999996,"body":"it's those happy accidents that birth something new."},{"startTime":2516.881,"endTime":2521.232,"body":"But then, you know, it makes me wonder, okay, if when I release Neverland,"},{"startTime":2521.522,"endTime":2527.562,"body":"Could someone be like, no, that's just a derivative of this song."},{"startTime":2529.7619999999997,"endTime":2531.922,"body":"Where did their spark come from?"},{"startTime":2532.182,"endTime":2534.555,"body":"It's all coming from source."},{"startTime":2534.555,"endTime":2543.6,"body":"Yeah, mean, I mean, geez, dude, we this is that's the whole point of well, it's not the"},{"startTime":2534.555,"endTime":2543.6,"body":"whole point of heretic, but we talked we talked quite a lot about it in heretic, right?"},{"startTime":2543.6,"endTime":2545.171,"body":"Where it's just like everything's in the area."},{"startTime":2545.171,"endTime":2547.692,"body":"Like there's only so many notes in music."},{"startTime":2548.593,"endTime":2559.078,"body":"You know, I someone once told me when it comes when it comes to songwriting, when I was"},{"startTime":2548.593,"endTime":2559.078,"body":"trying to learn how to like, find the progressions that like sound good to me."},{"startTime":2559.879,"endTime":2564.211,"body":"She was just like, listen to a song you like and look up the chord progressions on it."},{"startTime":2564.211,"endTime":2565.383,"body":"and then just play that."},{"startTime":2565.383,"endTime":2567.477,"body":"I was like, okay, yeah, I guess I could do that."},{"startTime":2567.477,"endTime":2571.698,"body":"And that's, mean, that's what you're talking about with Neverland, right?"},{"startTime":2571.698,"endTime":2579.538,"body":"lot of my songs that I write, it's because I'm filling a certain way or I'm playing a"},{"startTime":2571.698,"endTime":2579.538,"body":"certain cover and I'm like, I love the feeling of this cover."},{"startTime":2579.538,"endTime":2584.218,"body":"I would like to evoke like a write a song with this feeling that it evokes in me."},{"startTime":2584.218,"endTime":2585.618,"body":"So you already have the chord pattern."},{"startTime":2585.618,"endTime":2590.8379999999997,"body":"just, it's just, you find a different melody, a different way to strum it, a different"},{"startTime":2585.618,"endTime":2590.8379999999997,"body":"beat pattern to it."},{"startTime":2590.8379999999997,"endTime":2594.5539999999996,"body":"And a different song emerges, but you're using the same chord progression."},{"startTime":2595.701,"endTime":2597.0939999999996,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":2597.0939999999996,"endTime":2602.368,"body":"yeah, and so there's something about this whole like owning a piece of nature that came"},{"startTime":2597.0939999999996,"endTime":2602.368,"body":"through you."},{"startTime":2602.368,"endTime":2605.2799999999997,"body":"And there's a part of me that's like, I want to decolonize that."},{"startTime":2605.2799999999997,"endTime":2616.4689999999996,"body":"But at the same time, you were really good at this because you're like, no, there is a"},{"startTime":2605.2799999999997,"endTime":2616.4689999999996,"body":"value in being the vessel through which that came through."},{"startTime":2616.4689999999996,"endTime":2624.314,"body":"And especially if you're talking about like monetizing art or being an artist and"},{"startTime":2616.4689999999996,"endTime":2624.314,"body":"sustaining yourself."},{"startTime":2624.432,"endTime":2637.3199999999997,"body":"And with, especially with all the vultures out there, I mean, all of the agents and,"},{"startTime":2624.432,"endTime":2637.3199999999997,"body":"people who are looking for the next buck and the next, to, to latch onto the next cre- to"},{"startTime":2637.3199999999997,"endTime":2638.931,"body":"the next Taylor Swift."},{"startTime":2639.211,"endTime":2643.5739999999996,"body":"I mean, Taylor Swift had to like, declaw herself from, from that."},{"startTime":2643.5739999999996,"endTime":2647.547,"body":"She had to get big enough to where she could be like, fuck you, I'm doing my own thing."},{"startTime":2647.547,"endTime":2649.919,"body":"But she had to get big enough to do that."},{"startTime":2649.919,"endTime":2650.723,"body":"Right."},{"startTime":2651.839,"endTime":2654.006,"body":"And, I don't know."},{"startTime":2654.006,"endTime":2656.8439999999996,"body":"It's just an interesting thought that I'm kind of sitting with."},{"startTime":2657.9089999999997,"endTime":2666.432,"body":"Well, yeah, I mean, you and I kind of went back and forth on it just as far as like"},{"startTime":2657.9089999999997,"endTime":2666.432,"body":"conceptually, because it's hard to do."},{"startTime":2666.432,"endTime":2667.903,"body":"This is like everything we talk about, though."},{"startTime":2667.903,"endTime":2674.576,"body":"There's not like a, OK, this fits into column A and then the other side of it fits into"},{"startTime":2667.903,"endTime":2674.576,"body":"column B."},{"startTime":2674.576,"endTime":2679.8329999999996,"body":"Everything is just sort of like mixed and there's shades of gray."},{"startTime":2679.8329999999996,"endTime":2684.98,"body":"mean, even the thing that we're talking about as far as like with different like"},{"startTime":2679.8329999999996,"endTime":2684.98,"body":"substances."},{"startTime":2685.9399999999996,"endTime":2687.5409999999997,"body":"It's like, understand."},{"startTime":2688.2129999999997,"endTime":2695.3129999999996,"body":"Having said all of the things that I've said so far, where I'm like, I want to change my"},{"startTime":2688.2129999999997,"endTime":2695.3129999999996,"body":"relationship and I want to be, I want to observe it more and I want to be a little bit"},{"startTime":2695.3129999999996,"endTime":2696.6929999999998,"body":"more intentional and blah, blah, blah."},{"startTime":2696.6929999999998,"endTime":2708.493,"body":"I also understand why there are artists and creators out there who never come back from"},{"startTime":2696.6929999999998,"endTime":2708.493,"body":"it, who never, get, who get into a substance and they never come back because they're,"},{"startTime":2708.493,"endTime":2714.895,"body":"they're not only are they, not only are they chasing the feeling that comes from that, but"},{"startTime":2708.493,"endTime":2714.895,"body":"they're also chasing the"},{"startTime":2714.895,"endTime":2720.529,"body":"what it resulted like they're chasing the creative spark or having that creativity flow"},{"startTime":2714.895,"endTime":2720.529,"body":"through them a little bit."},{"startTime":2720.529,"endTime":2721.4289999999996,"body":"Right."},{"startTime":2721.5699999999997,"endTime":2724.4449999999997,"body":"Like, so it's not just like sensory."},{"startTime":2724.4449999999997,"endTime":2730.2349999999997,"body":"It's like, it feels so good to, you know, do and be doing heroin."},{"startTime":2730.836,"endTime":2737.531,"body":"It's like also heroin produced this great song that changed my life and change."},{"startTime":2737.531,"endTime":2738.431,"body":"Like there's a lot to it."},{"startTime":2738.431,"endTime":2738.982,"body":"You know what I mean?"},{"startTime":2738.982,"endTime":2744.095,"body":"And so for me, I equal parts agree."},{"startTime":2744.095,"endTime":2752.928,"body":"wholeheartedly with what you're saying about you can't own something that is just flowing"},{"startTime":2744.095,"endTime":2752.928,"body":"through the ether of the universe."},{"startTime":2753.1279999999997,"endTime":2763.785,"body":"But also if someone else is going to exploit that, should have access to that, to how they"},{"startTime":2753.1279999999997,"endTime":2763.785,"body":"utilize that."},{"startTime":2763.785,"endTime":2767.3019999999997,"body":"I guess that's, it's a weird, it's a tough conversation to have, right?"},{"startTime":2767.3019999999997,"endTime":2778.413,"body":"Yeah, I mean, even recently with, I think Olivia Rodrigo removed one of her songs from"},{"startTime":2767.3019999999997,"endTime":2778.413,"body":"TikTok because, the Trump campaign used it after they won."},{"startTime":2778.4739999999997,"endTime":2785.321,"body":"And, and yeah, if I wrote a song and then like the Trump campaign used my song to"},{"startTime":2778.4739999999997,"endTime":2785.321,"body":"celebrate, it's not like, no, fuck you."},{"startTime":2785.321,"endTime":2786.1609999999996,"body":"No."},{"startTime":2786.473,"endTime":2792.98,"body":"Right, we wouldn't be like, well, it's just the universe owns, like the universe, it just"},{"startTime":2786.473,"endTime":2792.98,"body":"came out."},{"startTime":2792.98,"endTime":2796.823,"body":"yeah, Trump can pluck it out and use it for whatever."},{"startTime":2796.984,"endTime":2799.6859999999997,"body":"There are some things that it's like, hold on a second here, right?"},{"startTime":2799.6859999999997,"endTime":2801.768,"body":"There are some parameters and some boundaries."},{"startTime":2801.768,"endTime":2802.72,"body":"Yeah, it's weird."},{"startTime":2802.72,"endTime":2804.8419999999996,"body":"And copycats are everywhere."},{"startTime":2804.8419999999996,"endTime":2811.767,"body":"mean, you find it with like, people, it's like you have to protect your art, especially if"},{"startTime":2804.8419999999996,"endTime":2811.767,"body":"you want to do that for a living."},{"startTime":2812.0879999999997,"endTime":2816.2509999999997,"body":"But then yet you need to have this relationship to the source."},{"startTime":2816.2509999999997,"endTime":2821.9359999999997,"body":"That's the oneness of everything that like to birth that art."},{"startTime":2822.397,"endTime":2829.321,"body":"And it's weird to call that mine, but like it's a..."},{"startTime":2829.3909999999996,"endTime":2831.0339999999997,"body":"It's an interesting relationship."},{"startTime":2831.0339999999997,"endTime":2833.046,"body":"think we just keep talking about that."},{"startTime":2833.046,"endTime":2834.1859999999997,"body":"let's just keep talking about it."},{"startTime":2834.1859999999997,"endTime":2835.1769999999997,"body":"Let's use examples."},{"startTime":2835.1769999999997,"endTime":2837.798,"body":"like I've listened to our last episode."},{"startTime":2837.798,"endTime":2849.493,"body":"I've listened to the last three minutes of it about conservatively one billion times"},{"startTime":2837.798,"endTime":2849.493,"body":"because I just love Pour Ourselves Some Cheer."},{"startTime":2849.493,"endTime":2851.2129999999997,"body":"I love that song so much."},{"startTime":2851.2129999999997,"endTime":2860.3269999999998,"body":"And Mike, I already told you this, but I played that song, not played the recording of it,"},{"startTime":2851.2129999999997,"endTime":2860.3269999999998,"body":"but I played it for some people."},{"startTime":2860.5649999999996,"endTime":2862.127,"body":"And I was like, yeah, Mike wrote this song."},{"startTime":2862.127,"endTime":2866.6319999999996,"body":"And they were like, why is Mike not pursuing songwriting as his full-time career?"},{"startTime":2866.6319999999996,"endTime":2869.614,"body":"That's what they said when they heard that song, right?"},{"startTime":2869.6549999999997,"endTime":2877.7639999999997,"body":"And it came back to this exact fucking discussion that we're having where it's like, well,"},{"startTime":2869.6549999999997,"endTime":2877.7639999999997,"body":"because it's complicated."},{"startTime":2877.7639999999997,"endTime":2878.395,"body":"You know mean?"},{"startTime":2878.395,"endTime":2882.779,"body":"Because it's like, there's like some complex shit coming on there as far as that goes."},{"startTime":2883.3019999999997,"endTime":2886.1929999999998,"body":"By the way, that's the best compliment I could get."},{"startTime":2886.236,"endTime":2888.1609999999996,"body":"yeah, dude, I loved hearing it."},{"startTime":2888.1609999999996,"endTime":2890.6279999999997,"body":"Like I couldn't wait to pass that compliment on to you."},{"startTime":2890.6279999999997,"endTime":2893.4249999999997,"body":"As you know, I drunkenly texted it to you."},{"startTime":2893.926,"endTime":2894.7279999999996,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":2897.56,"endTime":2905.9159999999997,"body":"And I, same, immediately when we released that episode two weeks ago, I listened to like"},{"startTime":2897.56,"endTime":2905.9159999999997,"body":"the first couple of minutes and I immediately skipped forward to the end because I knew I"},{"startTime":2905.9159999999997,"endTime":2909.538,"body":"wanted to hear those songs and hear how they sounded on Spotify."},{"startTime":2909.538,"endTime":2913.861,"body":"And I don't know how many times I listened to them back and forth."},{"startTime":2915.553,"endTime":2923.9719999999998,"body":"I have a thing where I pretty quickly get tired of my own voice, but that song of yours is"},{"startTime":2915.553,"endTime":2923.9719999999998,"body":"something about it, dude."},{"startTime":2923.9719999999998,"endTime":2926.2639999999997,"body":"It just kind of, I don't know."},{"startTime":2926.2639999999997,"endTime":2928.2859999999996,"body":"It sounds like Christmas to me."},{"startTime":2929.5679999999998,"endTime":2931.81,"body":"I don't have a better way to say that."},{"startTime":2931.81,"endTime":2938.8219999999997,"body":"Yeah, I guess that's a, I don't mean to hit the brakes on this whole conversation by just"},{"startTime":2931.81,"endTime":2938.8219999999997,"body":"gushing on you."},{"startTime":2938.8219999999997,"endTime":2943.042,"body":"I could, I'm like, I feel the same way with Ho Ho Ho Xana."},{"startTime":2943.042,"endTime":2954.2019999999998,"body":"And you know what my favorite line in that song is, by the way, when you're like, when"},{"startTime":2943.042,"endTime":2954.2019999999998,"body":"he's like, coming down the chimney and up he goes."},{"startTime":2954.2019999999998,"endTime":2955.607,"body":"Look up he goes."},{"startTime":2955.607,"endTime":2960.537,"body":"Yeah, it's like, there's a newborn babe in swaddling clothes coming down the chimney."},{"startTime":2960.537,"endTime":2961.4449999999997,"body":"back up he goes."},{"startTime":2961.4449999999997,"endTime":2963.312,"body":"It's just, I love that."},{"startTime":2963.312,"endTime":2964.613,"body":"I do like that line."},{"startTime":2965.595,"endTime":2968.018,"body":"and there's so I can't wait to do to record that one."},{"startTime":2968.018,"endTime":2972.803,"body":"And we got sleigh bells and everything going on in it."},{"startTime":2974.026,"endTime":2974.906,"body":"But."},{"startTime":2978.386,"endTime":2988.319,"body":"Yeah, so with that said, one of the things that, so we can get back to this if we want to,"},{"startTime":2978.386,"endTime":2988.319,"body":"but I do want to just hit on the Bufo experience for a minute."},{"startTime":2988.319,"endTime":2989.4539999999997,"body":"Yeah, I'd love that."},{"startTime":2990.448,"endTime":2995.4199999999996,"body":"That it's been one of the most, one of my favorite journeys I've done."},{"startTime":2995.8179999999998,"endTime":3005.2859999999996,"body":"and it's, it's for anyone who's ever done it, it's hard to kind of explain what happens,"},{"startTime":2995.8179999999998,"endTime":3005.2859999999996,"body":"but I was working with a practitioner who would kind of build you up to it."},{"startTime":3005.2859999999996,"endTime":3007.8669999999997,"body":"Like you'd take progressive doses."},{"startTime":3008.5679999999998,"endTime":3020.4539999999997,"body":"And what I love that, cause it allows you to kind of sit with the stories that are coming"},{"startTime":3008.5679999999998,"endTime":3020.4539999999997,"body":"up and, and kind of each time go a little deeper, but the very last."},{"startTime":3021.234,"endTime":3024.336,"body":"I think I did like four or five hits."},{"startTime":3024.336,"endTime":3028.839,"body":"Now the first two were kind of small, the third was medium and the last two were pretty"},{"startTime":3024.336,"endTime":3028.839,"body":"big."},{"startTime":3030.1,"endTime":3038.7659999999996,"body":"But the last one, completely, so in each one before that, I was kind of working through"},{"startTime":3030.1,"endTime":3038.7659999999996,"body":"some issues, working through some things I was really worried about."},{"startTime":3040.388,"endTime":3045.8599999999997,"body":"I had such a felt concept of letting go that I've never felt before."},{"startTime":3045.8599999999997,"endTime":3054.598,"body":"Like it felt like every muscle tendon joint in my body was just like relaxed."},{"startTime":3054.598,"endTime":3057.745,"body":"I felt like I was just a puddle on the floor."},{"startTime":3057.845,"endTime":3063.047,"body":"And it felt like anything I could possibly worry about was just like evaporating off of"},{"startTime":3057.845,"endTime":3063.047,"body":"me."},{"startTime":3064.0679999999998,"endTime":3068.49,"body":"And it's like, is this what letting go feels like?"},{"startTime":3068.49,"endTime":3069.232,"body":"It's like..."},{"startTime":3069.232,"endTime":3074.2459999999996,"body":"Don't try to control the story that's happening in front of you."},{"startTime":3074.2459999999996,"endTime":3079.9109999999996,"body":"Just relax and let the story play out."},{"startTime":3080.232,"endTime":3089.6699999999996,"body":"Engage with the story, but don't try to engage in a way of like, I want to manipulate the"},{"startTime":3080.232,"endTime":3089.6699999999996,"body":"outcome or hold on like, I really want this outcome."},{"startTime":3089.6699999999996,"endTime":3092.582,"body":"so try to grasp on a certain outcome."},{"startTime":3093.5629999999996,"endTime":3096.5049999999997,"body":"Just melt."},{"startTime":3098.725,"endTime":3099.607,"body":"and"},{"startTime":3102.026,"endTime":3104.747,"body":"And that feeling has stuck with me."},{"startTime":3105.488,"endTime":3107.779,"body":"Like I can access it."},{"startTime":3107.779,"endTime":3120.6059999999998,"body":"in times when I just feel like in the last week and a half since I did it, I don't know,"},{"startTime":3107.779,"endTime":3120.6059999999998,"body":"it's just, there's been a lot of times when I find myself like trying to manipulate the"},{"startTime":3120.6059999999998,"endTime":3131.1099999999997,"body":"story or trying to change the story or trying to like force something and then just take a"},{"startTime":3120.6059999999998,"endTime":3131.1099999999997,"body":"deep breath and just like relax and let that"},{"startTime":3131.1099999999997,"endTime":3139.337,"body":"desire to force just like, just let it go and just be like, I mean, being in traffic is a"},{"startTime":3131.1099999999997,"endTime":3139.337,"body":"good way to practice it."},{"startTime":3139.337,"endTime":3142.2189999999996,"body":"Like if something happens in traffic and you're like, you know, and it's like, okay."},{"startTime":3142.721,"endTime":3149.93,"body":"And you know, you hear about that when we've read like the surrender experiment and like"},{"startTime":3142.721,"endTime":3149.93,"body":"the untethered soul and letting go."},{"startTime":3149.93,"endTime":3156.7929999999997,"body":"But I was like, letting go is so much more relaxed than I ever imagined it was."},{"startTime":3157.941,"endTime":3159.961,"body":"That's so interesting, yeah."},{"startTime":3161.2619999999997,"endTime":3162.2019999999998,"body":"Wow."},{"startTime":3162.723,"endTime":3172.0449999999996,"body":"This is like good, this is good shit for me to hear tonight, Mike, because control, like"},{"startTime":3162.723,"endTime":3172.0449999999996,"body":"control keeps coming up for me, you know?"},{"startTime":3172.0449999999996,"endTime":3183.629,"body":"Even as we're talking about the, even as we're talking about our relationship with"},{"startTime":3172.0449999999996,"endTime":3183.629,"body":"substances, I'm also thinking about how lately I've been."},{"startTime":3184.341,"endTime":3189.741,"body":"a little more intentional with like my exercise routine and stuff like that, you know?"},{"startTime":3190.321,"endTime":3200.341,"body":"But I bring that up because it's me trying to force something."},{"startTime":3200.341,"endTime":3202.0609999999997,"body":"Like it's me trying to control something."},{"startTime":3202.0609999999997,"endTime":3207.0009999999997,"body":"It's not like I'm easing back into like a different routine in like a healthy way."},{"startTime":3207.0009999999997,"endTime":3213.8689999999997,"body":"It's like I'm trying to jumpstart my body and almost have like a"},{"startTime":3214.665,"endTime":3225.6899999999996,"body":"like a rude awakening to my body because it's like, I can, if I can just, if I can just"},{"startTime":3214.665,"endTime":3225.6899999999996,"body":"control this, if I can just like, you know, take it by the, take it by the reins."},{"startTime":3225.6899999999996,"endTime":3228.0209999999997,"body":"That's true about all the things that we're talking about."},{"startTime":3228.0209999999997,"endTime":3232.2329999999997,"body":"You even, even the, even my shitty take on like wicked and stuff like that."},{"startTime":3232.2329999999997,"endTime":3242.397,"body":"It's about me trying to control my experience here rather than just like what I'm hearing"},{"startTime":3232.2329999999997,"endTime":3242.397,"body":"you describe as the letting go process is so much less."},{"startTime":3242.9489999999996,"endTime":3248.3269999999998,"body":"of a like, okay, now we're gonna dominate letting go."},{"startTime":3248.3269999999998,"endTime":3251.4919999999997,"body":"Now I'm going to master letting go."},{"startTime":3251.4919999999997,"endTime":3256.209,"body":"It's like a counterintuitive concept, right?"},{"startTime":3257.348,"endTime":3261.801,"body":"Yeah, another thing to..."},{"startTime":3261.801,"endTime":3265.633,"body":"So it kind of relates to this that I'm feeling and maybe you can relate to it."},{"startTime":3265.633,"endTime":3276.609,"body":"So I've done Bufo several times and I've never really gotten to that spot where it's like,"},{"startTime":3265.633,"endTime":3276.609,"body":"I'm just in the oneness."},{"startTime":3277.21,"endTime":3280.812,"body":"And I'd always pictured it differently though."},{"startTime":3280.872,"endTime":3284.814,"body":"I'd always pictured it more in like a spiritual way where it's like, I'm like..."},{"startTime":3284.95,"endTime":3287.6409999999996,"body":"my gosh, like I've made it, I've achieved it."},{"startTime":3287.6409999999996,"endTime":3291.643,"body":"And now I'm just like there in like the sun almost, right?"},{"startTime":3291.643,"endTime":3293.624,"body":"And maybe I'm sure that experience exists."},{"startTime":3293.624,"endTime":3294.544,"body":"I'm sure people have it."},{"startTime":3294.544,"endTime":3297.855,"body":"I'm sure it's an amazing experience."},{"startTime":3298.616,"endTime":3300.4159999999997,"body":"And maybe I'll have that someday."},{"startTime":3300.6569999999997,"endTime":3308.3399999999997,"body":"But what mine was, was a complete melting into, it felt like opposite way."},{"startTime":3309.06,"endTime":3312.3219999999997,"body":"It felt like not something to achieve or not something to get to."},{"startTime":3312.3219999999997,"endTime":3313.582,"body":"It's just like..."},{"startTime":3314.194,"endTime":3318.334,"body":"just fucking relax and let go."},{"startTime":3318.874,"endTime":3332.334,"body":"let it was like a relaxing into the earth rather than a being transported or to heaven or"},{"startTime":3318.874,"endTime":3332.334,"body":"like achieving all these things, you know, to get to something."},{"startTime":3332.334,"endTime":3336.162,"body":"And it seems like a similar dynamic you're talking about maybe."},{"startTime":3338.194,"endTime":3339.8439999999996,"body":"End up from a felt sense?"},{"startTime":3341.6209999999996,"endTime":3345.904,"body":"Sorry, I'm just, working my mute button because there's shouting going on over here."},{"startTime":3346.301,"endTime":3347.8419999999996,"body":"I don't know if you can very..."},{"startTime":3347.8419999999996,"endTime":3348.562,"body":"I don't know."},{"startTime":3348.562,"endTime":3350.2459999999996,"body":"I don't know if it'll pick up, but..."},{"startTime":3350.921,"endTime":3352.45,"body":"Well, okay, yeah."},{"startTime":3354.9109999999996,"endTime":3363.6459999999997,"body":"So I guess what I'm to answer, I don't know if I have an answer to your question because I"},{"startTime":3354.9109999999996,"endTime":3363.6459999999997,"body":"don't know if I, I don't know if there is an answer to your question, but what I'm trying"},{"startTime":3363.6459999999997,"endTime":3378.254,"body":"to say and maybe failing at is that there are certain things that I either try to, how do"},{"startTime":3363.6459999999997,"endTime":3378.254,"body":"I say this?"},{"startTime":3378.394,"endTime":3384.0069999999996,"body":"Like I want to master something or I want to like, I want to like fully experience that"},{"startTime":3378.394,"endTime":3384.0069999999996,"body":"thing."},{"startTime":3384.421,"endTime":3393.569,"body":"And so instead of a natural, healthy, sustainable approach to it, I go overboard with it."},{"startTime":3393.569,"endTime":3401.835,"body":"So we're talking about like, I go overboard with my narrative of wicked."},{"startTime":3401.835,"endTime":3407.0499999999997,"body":"I go overboard with my use of substances."},{"startTime":3407.0499999999997,"endTime":3411.383,"body":"And when I say substances, we're talking about stuff as simple as like caffeine, stuff"},{"startTime":3407.0499999999997,"endTime":3411.383,"body":"like that."},{"startTime":3411.383,"endTime":3414.185,"body":"I go overboard with my"},{"startTime":3414.1929999999998,"endTime":3417.1949999999997,"body":"Okay, it's time to strengthen up this body."},{"startTime":3417.1949999999997,"endTime":3420.39,"body":"So we're going to like shock it into, into coherence."},{"startTime":3420.39,"endTime":3422.919,"body":"We're going to shock it back to life, you know, type of thing."},{"startTime":3422.919,"endTime":3428.2929999999997,"body":"And as I'm hearing you, so there's no, there's no mean understanding anything here."},{"startTime":3428.2929999999997,"endTime":3439.701,"body":"There's just me observing that as I'm hearing you describe your experience of, of letting"},{"startTime":3428.2929999999997,"endTime":3439.701,"body":"go or your experience of becoming one with the, with everything, becoming one with the"},{"startTime":3439.701,"endTime":3443.013,"body":"oneness, it's like, yeah."},{"startTime":3443.381,"endTime":3455.9249999999997,"body":"There's probably in that practice, in that exercise of learning to let go, it's not like"},{"startTime":3443.381,"endTime":3455.9249999999997,"body":"a, okay, I'm doing it, I'm starting now, I'm letting go, and that's the fucking end of it."},{"startTime":3455.9249999999997,"endTime":3461.346,"body":"It's more of like a, wow, let me be more observant of it."},{"startTime":3461.346,"endTime":3469.028,"body":"You use the traffic example as like a good way to like sort of like in a pressure cooker,"},{"startTime":3461.346,"endTime":3469.028,"body":"figure out how that can operate, right?"},{"startTime":3469.3489999999997,"endTime":3470.769,"body":"But can I do it?"},{"startTime":3470.9089999999997,"endTime":3472.21,"body":"when I'm interacting with my kids?"},{"startTime":3472.21,"endTime":3477.234,"body":"Can I do it when I'm, you know, stressing about something in the workplace?"},{"startTime":3477.234,"endTime":3480.596,"body":"Can I do it when I'm trying to find something to get down on myself about?"},{"startTime":3480.596,"endTime":3494.687,"body":"Can I do it when I'm trying to, can I be more aware of it and observant of it instead of"},{"startTime":3480.596,"endTime":3494.687,"body":"trying to make it a, an item to check off my list of to do things, of things to do?"},{"startTime":3494.687,"endTime":3497.4289999999996,"body":"That's what I guess that's what I'm just trying to express."},{"startTime":3497.4289999999996,"endTime":3498.1389999999997,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":3499.79,"endTime":3500.9519999999998,"body":"Yeah,"},{"startTime":3504.8799999999997,"endTime":3508.3129999999996,"body":"I'm just kind sitting with that for a minute because I agree."},{"startTime":3508.3129999999996,"endTime":3518.8999999999996,"body":"it's this thing of like, and when it's that way, when you frame it that way, it's like,"},{"startTime":3508.3129999999996,"endTime":3518.8999999999996,"body":"there's no failure to it or something."},{"startTime":3518.8999999999996,"endTime":3521.602,"body":"It's like, it can just, you can change it in the moment."},{"startTime":3521.602,"endTime":3523.6229999999996,"body":"You can just like, okay."},{"startTime":3524.3439999999996,"endTime":3533.2599999999998,"body":"It's not, and even if you find yourself getting caught up again, you can always just be"},{"startTime":3524.3439999999996,"endTime":3533.2599999999998,"body":"like, wait, you can change it right there in the moment."},{"startTime":3534.3889999999997,"endTime":3536.669,"body":"Yeah, I like, I like that."},{"startTime":3536.669,"endTime":3537.4689999999996,"body":"just hits that."},{"startTime":3537.4689999999996,"endTime":3540.649,"body":"That just hits me right in the, in the fucking gut, man."},{"startTime":3540.649,"endTime":3552.4289999999996,"body":"That my feels that I, just, you just said it in a way that I tried to say for like the"},{"startTime":3540.649,"endTime":3552.4289999999996,"body":"last 10 minutes, which is like, it doesn't have to be some huge thing that you're"},{"startTime":3552.4289999999996,"endTime":3553.589,"body":"eventually going to do."},{"startTime":3553.589,"endTime":3555.089,"body":"can happen."},{"startTime":3555.089,"endTime":3557.189,"body":"It can happen right now."},{"startTime":3557.749,"endTime":3559.4689999999996,"body":"And I don't have to force it to happen."},{"startTime":3559.4689999999996,"endTime":3559.609,"body":"Right."},{"startTime":3559.609,"endTime":3563.7749999999996,"body":"I have to like suddenly just be like, okay, letting go in three."},{"startTime":3563.7749999999996,"endTime":3565.6079999999997,"body":"two, one."},{"startTime":3565.99,"endTime":3567.172,"body":"I guess that's what I'm trying to say."},{"startTime":3567.172,"endTime":3569.683,"body":"Yeah, it's kind of like, okay."},{"startTime":3569.944,"endTime":3570.698,"body":"where am I?"},{"startTime":3570.698,"endTime":3573.546,"body":"You know, because it felt like everything in my body was relaxing."},{"startTime":3573.546,"endTime":3577.3579999999997,"body":"So it's just kind of like saying, wait, okay, yeah, my jaw is tight right now."},{"startTime":3577.3579999999997,"endTime":3582.3709999999996,"body":"And just kind of like loosen your jaw and then just kind of like, and you can do this as"},{"startTime":3577.3579999999997,"endTime":3582.3709999999996,"body":"someone's talking to you and as you're paying attention."},{"startTime":3582.3709999999996,"endTime":3584.8529999999996,"body":"In fact, it can actually help you pay more attention to the person."},{"startTime":3584.8529999999996,"endTime":3589.2949999999996,"body":"And because you're not like, it's like, okay, this person's talking, I'm going to listen"},{"startTime":3584.8529999999996,"endTime":3589.2949999999996,"body":"to them."},{"startTime":3589.2949999999996,"endTime":3591.9869999999996,"body":"Meanwhile, there's like a tension in my belly."},{"startTime":3591.9869999999996,"endTime":3594.218,"body":"I'm going to kind of just like let that melt."},{"startTime":3594.5429999999997,"endTime":3605.394,"body":"You know, like, let it just kind of relax as you're in being present to what they're"},{"startTime":3594.5429999999997,"endTime":3605.394,"body":"saying and you're not trying to."},{"startTime":3607.27,"endTime":3615.348,"body":"force them, force what they're saying or force them, force the conversation somewhere in a"},{"startTime":3607.27,"endTime":3615.348,"body":"way, or like you just, it's like a listening."},{"startTime":3615.348,"endTime":3616.239,"body":"I guess that's it too."},{"startTime":3616.239,"endTime":3630.33,"body":"It's kind of like relaxing and a listening and allowing a receiving and it feels, and it's"},{"startTime":3616.239,"endTime":3630.33,"body":"shit we've talked about since we started this fucking podcast, but like, but"},{"startTime":3630.33,"endTime":3633.1059999999998,"body":"we titled one of our podcasts, Let It Go, right?"},{"startTime":3633.1059999999998,"endTime":3634.446,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":3634.6859999999997,"endTime":3639.566,"body":"And early on when we were both reading that book, the surrender experiment."},{"startTime":3641.7859999999996,"endTime":3643.466,"body":"but there's something even about it."},{"startTime":3643.466,"endTime":3648.8559999999998,"body":"That's like, it's such a, it's, it's a felt, it's a muscle that we're all always working"},{"startTime":3643.466,"endTime":3648.8559999999998,"body":"on, I guess."},{"startTime":3648.8559999999998,"endTime":3657.6659999999997,"body":"And so I guess what I'm feeling like is lately I've been able to, you know, thank you to"},{"startTime":3648.8559999999998,"endTime":3657.6659999999997,"body":"the ceremony."},{"startTime":3658.2459999999996,"endTime":3659.8019999999997,"body":"you know, it's that thing like."},{"startTime":3660.1459999999997,"endTime":3664.192,"body":"Because again, just to circle back to their conversation with substances,"},{"startTime":3670.4629999999997,"endTime":3674.0649999999996,"body":"This complicated relationship with them, you know, we have."},{"startTime":3676.6079999999997,"endTime":3678.049,"body":"It's also..."},{"startTime":3682.1929999999998,"endTime":3686.877,"body":"Some of these things are here to kind of like, to get all Mormon to bless us in a way."},{"startTime":3686.877,"endTime":3696.1639999999998,"body":"like, mushrooms, ayahuasca, ketamine, you know, alcohol at times, cannabis at times, tea,"},{"startTime":3686.877,"endTime":3696.1639999999998,"body":"coffee,"},{"startTime":3697.8199999999997,"endTime":3703.182,"body":"dried fruit, you know, like the earth is here and it's like."},{"startTime":3705.959,"endTime":3717.39,"body":"I'm having a hard time articulating this, it's like, so as mindful I want to be as about"},{"startTime":3705.959,"endTime":3717.39,"body":"how I'm using these things, I still want to keep using them in a mindful way because..."},{"startTime":3720.2219999999998,"endTime":3721.442,"body":"We can't do it alone."},{"startTime":3721.442,"endTime":3723.8529999999996,"body":"Even if you're like, I want to do things substance-free."},{"startTime":3723.8529999999996,"endTime":3726.614,"body":"Well, bullshit, you're going to drink water and eat food."},{"startTime":3726.614,"endTime":3729.8439999999996,"body":"You're not going to be substance-free."},{"startTime":3730.165,"endTime":3738.787,"body":"You can't detach yourself from this earth and from the mud and from food and from"},{"startTime":3730.165,"endTime":3738.787,"body":"partaking."},{"startTime":3738.787,"endTime":3744.328,"body":"We are from the earth and we only sustain ourselves by partaking of the earth."},{"startTime":3744.3489999999997,"endTime":3750.27,"body":"And yeah, some of the things you eat will have more of an impact on, like some things are"},{"startTime":3744.3489999999997,"endTime":3750.27,"body":"stronger than others."},{"startTime":3750.364,"endTime":3758.692,"body":"But every little thing will affect you in some way, from the maverick hot dog to smoking a"},{"startTime":3750.364,"endTime":3758.692,"body":"bufo pen."},{"startTime":3761.397,"endTime":3762.297,"body":"Yeah, man."},{"startTime":3767.071,"endTime":3770.182,"body":"And all that said, dude, Maverick hot dogs sounds so good to me right now."},{"startTime":3770.182,"endTime":3774.424,"body":"And I guess that's for what I'm experiencing."},{"startTime":3774.424,"endTime":3785.4089999999997,"body":"I can't speak for your thing, but like from what I'm experiencing is that that's also part"},{"startTime":3774.424,"endTime":3785.4089999999997,"body":"of the point for me is it's like, I guess I'm just trying to observe like that."},{"startTime":3785.4089999999997,"endTime":3793.3529999999996,"body":"This value judgment that I put on every fucking thing that I do, because there's also room"},{"startTime":3785.4089999999997,"endTime":3793.3529999999996,"body":"for tying it on once in a while."},{"startTime":3793.3529999999996,"endTime":3794.325,"body":"You know I mean?"},{"startTime":3794.325,"endTime":3798.575,"body":"And the fool, the fool comes out where it's just like, OK, man, I don't know where I'm"},{"startTime":3794.325,"endTime":3798.575,"body":"going."},{"startTime":3798.575,"endTime":3799.495,"body":"And I don't know where I've been."},{"startTime":3799.495,"endTime":3802.785,"body":"I'm just going to I'm just going to be here and do this."},{"startTime":3802.9049999999997,"endTime":3804.625,"body":"There's room for that, too."},{"startTime":3804.625,"endTime":3815.745,"body":"All I'm trying to say is that this conversation has been really beneficial for me of just"},{"startTime":3804.625,"endTime":3815.745,"body":"like, hey, can you can you maybe slow your rhythms down and just be a little more"},{"startTime":3815.745,"endTime":3817.9049999999997,"body":"observant of what you're doing and why you're doing it?"},{"startTime":3817.9049999999997,"endTime":3821.825,"body":"I guess that's kind of what's what's what's."},{"startTime":3821.825,"endTime":3824.3329999999996,"body":"That's what's that's that's where it's fitting in for me."},{"startTime":3825.2019999999998,"endTime":3828.591,"body":"So I'm gonna carry that into the theater this weekend when I see Wicked."},{"startTime":3829.1659999999997,"endTime":3833.0099999999998,"body":"Yeah, Yeah, dude, I listen."},{"startTime":3833.0099999999998,"endTime":3837.3239999999996,"body":"Don't get me going again on Wicked, but it's just man."},{"startTime":3837.3239999999996,"endTime":3838.9759999999997,"body":"Adina Menzel, let it go."},{"startTime":3838.9759999999997,"endTime":3839.276,"body":"Right."},{"startTime":3839.276,"endTime":3847.7799999999997,"body":"mean, she's she's come up a couple of times today, so she might be the she might be the"},{"startTime":3839.276,"endTime":3847.7799999999997,"body":"muse of this particular episode,"},{"startTime":3847.7799999999997,"endTime":3855.8129999999996,"body":"And I wish I could say I had another Christmas song to add at end of this episode, but the"},{"startTime":3847.7799999999997,"endTime":3855.8129999999996,"body":"album's in process, but I need some and I don't have anything right now."},{"startTime":3855.8129999999996,"endTime":3856.935,"body":"Yeah, we got."},{"startTime":3857.5,"endTime":3858.352,"body":"Mike's got a lot."},{"startTime":3858.352,"endTime":3859.256,"body":"Mike's got a lot of things."},{"startTime":3859.256,"endTime":3859.6569999999997,"body":"Don't let him."},{"startTime":3859.6569999999997,"endTime":3860.39,"body":"Don't let him fool you."},{"startTime":3860.39,"endTime":3861.7729999999997,"body":"You have a lot of things,"},{"startTime":3862.354,"endTime":3866.114,"body":"I know, but it's a lot of things that are like, just need..."},{"startTime":3866.114,"endTime":3867.274,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":3867.274,"endTime":3868.624,"body":"And some of them are good."},{"startTime":3868.624,"endTime":3870.814,"body":"I really like some of them."},{"startTime":3871.134,"endTime":3872.274,"body":"But, you know."},{"startTime":3872.274,"endTime":3874.49,"body":"And even in that second one."},{"startTime":3874.504,"endTime":3878.147,"body":"be fruits falling from the tree, but they ain't a pie just yet, right?"},{"startTime":3878.468,"endTime":3879.069,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":3879.069,"endTime":3881.591,"body":"even that second one you were sending me, was loving."},{"startTime":3882.549,"endTime":3883.406,"body":"Vote one."},{"startTime":3883.692,"endTime":3885.4849999999997,"body":"You sent one, it was like..."},{"startTime":3886.089,"endTime":3886.763,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":3886.763,"endTime":3888.165,"body":"yeah, I know what you're talking about."},{"startTime":3888.165,"endTime":3890.769,"body":"That one's just like four lines or something like that."},{"startTime":3890.769,"endTime":3895.393,"body":"But you're talking about the one where it's like, it almost sounds like an Irish kind of"},{"startTime":3890.769,"endTime":3895.393,"body":"vibe to it."},{"startTime":3895.393,"endTime":3901.442,"body":"you talking about like where it's like, I saw snow fall on the glens and sunshine in the"},{"startTime":3895.393,"endTime":3901.442,"body":"valley and all that kind of bullshit."},{"startTime":3901.442,"endTime":3902.4829999999997,"body":"Yeah, all right."},{"startTime":3902.4829999999997,"endTime":3903.205,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":3904.593,"endTime":3908.156,"body":"right, well, you know, there's 20 days, 20-ish days till Christmas."},{"startTime":3908.156,"endTime":3911.0499999999997,"body":"So let's hop to it."},{"startTime":3911.6369999999997,"endTime":3917.4159999999997,"body":"So, I let's, I mean, I know we're talking about letting it go, but let's let her rip, I"},{"startTime":3911.6369999999997,"endTime":3917.4159999999997,"body":"guess, also."},{"startTime":3917.4159999999997,"endTime":3919.3669999999997,"body":"Okay."},{"startTime":3919.3669999999997,"endTime":3920.326,"body":"I'm not gonna put pressure on myself."},{"startTime":3920.326,"endTime":3923.602,"body":"I'm just gonna relax and do it and see what comes out."},{"startTime":3924.404,"endTime":3924.915,"body":"Exactly."},{"startTime":3924.915,"endTime":3926.727,"body":"All right."},{"startTime":3927.749,"endTime":3928.83,"body":"Okay, buddy."},{"startTime":3929.191,"endTime":3930.212,"body":"Love ya."},{"startTime":3930.3129999999996,"endTime":3932.335,"body":"Ho, ho, ho, Hosanna."},{"startTime":3932.576,"endTime":3934.058,"body":"To you and yours."},{"startTime":3934.1009999999997,"endTime":3937.922,"body":"And, and, and a very, pour yourself some cheer."},{"startTime":3937.922,"endTime":3940.694,"body":"Now listen, when we talk about pour yourself some cheer, that could mean water."},{"startTime":3940.694,"endTime":3942.484,"body":"That could be mean tea."},{"startTime":3942.484,"endTime":3943.365,"body":"could be coffee."},{"startTime":3943.365,"endTime":3944.2749999999996,"body":"It could be booze."},{"startTime":3944.2749999999996,"endTime":3944.946,"body":"It could be anything."},{"startTime":3944.946,"endTime":3946.4559999999997,"body":"It's just anything that cheers you up a little bit."},{"startTime":3946.4559999999997,"endTime":3947.227,"body":"Right."},{"startTime":3947.9469999999997,"endTime":3950.138,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":3951.634,"endTime":3952.877,"body":"I said stop."}]}