Share The Struggle
Share The Struggle
Patience And Progress In Small Business 230
What if the true essence of growth lies in those uncomfortable conversations we tend to avoid? Together we ponder the power of choosing to grow through struggles and the essential role that intimate bonds play in our lives.
Ever wondered why society is so obsessed with instant gratification? We tackle this modern-day dilemma with a dose of humor, drawing parallels between the fast-paced demands of today and the timeless patience required for true success. Through metaphors like childbirth, we highlight how the pursuit of quick rewards, often fueled by social media, can overshadow meaningful achievements. By sharing personal stories, we remind ourselves—and our listeners—that the most valuable dreams require time, sacrifice, and perseverance, and that the journey is just as important as the destination.
Have you ever faced a crossroads between financial security and genuine happiness? We share our own transformative experiences, from managing a veterinarian office and a Harley-Davidson dealership to bravely starting a new business venture, Loud Proud American. Facing job loss and reevaluating our paths, we chose to prioritize mental health and relationship well-being over monetary gain. By embracing the risks and rewards of betting on ourselves, we celebrate the resilience and courage it takes to follow true passions, even when life throws unexpected challenges our way. Listen in as we reflect on the choices that have shaped our lives and the milestones marking our journey.
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Whether we realize it or not, we crave instant gratification, but our biggest dreams are often at the end of the longest road, roads not just filled with twist turns, ups and downs, but riddled with sacrifices, hard work and heartache as we travel down the road less traveled. It's critical to celebrate milestones when they happen. So today, on episode 230 of Share, the Struggle podcast, we stop to celebrate a milestone moment for loud, proud Americans.
Speaker 2:Let me tell you something.
Speaker 1:Everybody struggles. The difference is some people choose to go through it and some choose to grow through it. The choice is completely yours. Which one you choose will have a very profound effect on the way you live your life. If you find strength in the struggle, then this podcast is for you. Do you have a relationship that is comfortable with uncomfortable conversations? Uncomfortable conversations challenge you, humble you and they build you. When you sprinkle a little time and distance on it, it all makes sense. Most disagreements, they stem from our own insecurities. You are right where you need to be. I'm falling behind Too fast and way too fast. Check, check, check. One, two, one, two. Hello, hello, Hello to you. Go for it.
Speaker 2:Hello, is this thing on Hello, hello? Can you hear me? Hello? Hello oh hello, hello to you, hello to you, hello, hello, hello, hello, hello to you, hello to you, hello, hello, hello, hello To you, to you, to you and you. Ah, you and you, from me and you, hello to you.
Speaker 1:This is the hello song.
Speaker 2:This is the hello song.
Speaker 1:The hello song. When is the hello song? The hello song when you turn your microphone on. Ooh, ooh, ooh, what it do, what it do, what it hot and diggity do. Good Lord, am I so excited to be back with you? I just can't hide it, even though we started this show a little bit different today, because we were doing our little microphone check and I felt like we encountered something beautiful, dear you mean you left that in there?
Speaker 2:Yeah, oh heavens.
Speaker 1:Oh, it's beautiful.
Speaker 2:They're going to tell me to keep my day job, it is catchy it is trendy.
Speaker 1:It is trendy, it is scrumptious, that little ditty we just came up with.
Speaker 2:I didn't even do my vocal warm-ups.
Speaker 1:You should have warmed up your vocals. Me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me. I aged you to the high notes.
Speaker 2:I got them for you this time.
Speaker 1:You did too. You nailed them, you crushed them. I'm glad we saved it, because I thought it was Microphone Guild Right there. Okay.
Speaker 2:Mic drop.
Speaker 1:I'm not dropping this one.
Speaker 2:No, don't do that, don't do it Too expensive.
Speaker 1:Well, here we are, reunited, and it feels so good, me and you, babe, this time around it's been me and you for the last 10 years, 11. I understand that, but not for the last few weeks on the podcast. I've been flying solo show over here.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's right.
Speaker 1:Solo Joe on a solo show.
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm.
Speaker 1:Not to be confused with solo Sokoa.
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm.
Speaker 1:This one's actually kind of fun because as we're recording, we rearrange the feng shui in the house.
Speaker 2:Yeah, now you're just staring at me like a weirdo.
Speaker 1:It's awkward, it's beautiful, it's romantic. It's uncomfortable. It's very. It's romantic, it's uncomfortable.
Speaker 2:It's very uncomfortable because he keeps staring at me.
Speaker 1:That's what people do when they have conversation.
Speaker 2:They look at each other. I'm just going to stare at the baby.
Speaker 1:You would anyways.
Speaker 2:Who's sleeping peacefully? I'm going to gaze at the rotating Christmas tree instead then, like the baby does.
Speaker 1:True. Anyway, we have rearranged, fan-dangled and who's-a-hangled the living room to squeeze in the old Christmas tree, and while doing so we have rearranged the couches, so they're now facing each other. This feels like a studio performance right now.
Speaker 2:It actually kind of, does You're? Not wrong yeah.
Speaker 1:I feel like we should do an episode like a couch sessions episode, like maybe like a you know double couple scenario here, something you know what I mean. We have room here. We have room for activities and for endless possibilities when it comes to a studio show.
Speaker 2:I don't know how to break this to you, but we have to have friends first.
Speaker 1:Not a lot of people like us.
Speaker 2:No.
Speaker 1:Not a lot of people like us. It is what it is.
Speaker 2:I think we just.
Speaker 1:Smell bad?
Speaker 2:No, we just keep our circle very small, like we have a lot of friends, don't get me wrong, but we keep our circle. Who you allow in your personal business?
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:Very small Does that make?
Speaker 1:sense. What you're trying to say on a technical side is we keep our areolas tight.
Speaker 2:That's sweet, yeah, no.
Speaker 1:I think I sort of myself the big nipple. You know what I mean.
Speaker 2:Oh my God, I'm in the center of the areola. No, but I'm just saying, like you have like friends that know like what's going on in your life and like that are like what you're saying is people don't come over that's what you're saying.
Speaker 1:Forget it. No, I'm not forgetting it, you spell it out for me we have all kinds of friends. What you're saying is at the end of the day, we're antisocial no and nobody comes over, that's what you're saying to me. Think of an onion, okay oh, I think of the onion all the time.
Speaker 2:I'm gonna peel the onion the center of the onion is the core right. Those are your core friendships, the ones that like know you what you have for breakfast, your baby's sick Stinky core of the onion.
Speaker 1:Okay, I quit. I'm literally trying to understand you. I'm gathering with you? No, you're not I want to be in the center of your onion, talk to me, I'm the stinky one. The friends that we keep closest the center, the core of the onion, they have to be, by default, the stinkiest. That's all I'm saying. No, if you smell your child right now, she is stinky.
Speaker 2:No, she's not. She smells like cocoa butter. That's it.
Speaker 1:She doesn't stink. She smells like sweaty coconuts.
Speaker 2:Oh my God, whatever, get on with your show. You're procrastinating.
Speaker 1:I'm not procrastinating. I was giving you an open dance floor here to explain to me what you're talking about, because you lost me in Helsinki.
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm, it's gone.
Speaker 1:Wow. Well, folks, welcome to the couple Szechuan portion of the show where we call the therapist for help.
Speaker 1:Good, Lord, I don't even know what the meaning of today's show was now I've lost it. I've lost the milestones. They've turned into kidney stones. See Y'all? It's a good thing I have one child, because after today's episode there won't be room for two. It's a good thing I have one child, because after today's episode there won't be room for two. When I said room, I actually said it as a womb. There won't be womb for two. Wow, this gets even more uncomfortable Now that I think about it. The couches facing each other horrible idea, absolutely horrible idea.
Speaker 2:This was your idea.
Speaker 1:No, this wasn't this couch scenario was your idea. No, this wasn't this couch scenario was your idea. But we're losing the people. They don't. They don't want to hear you just belittle me. They want to hear an actual episode of positivity the people are waiting. What are they waiting for, Dia?
Speaker 2:You.
Speaker 1:They're waiting to celebrate. They're waiting to celebrate with us. Yeah, let's get on with it, let's get on with it. Okay, as I was trying to say when we opened the show first off, I started off the total freaking episode with two words, two little words that are so difficult to put together Weather, and we, oh my God did, to put together Whether, and we oh my God, did I have some difficulty, whether we, whether we, whether we, whether we, we wise. It's so difficult, whether we, we wise it or not?
Speaker 1:We wave instant gratification, whether we we wise it or not. When I wrote down the little show opening, I never thought I would encounter so much difficulty on two words. But the point I'm trying to make here, beyond my procrastination, is that our biggest dreams, our biggest you know hopes and goals and aspirations they often take the longest to attain, even though that we are just always craving instant gratification. We're always looking for that like button, the old heart emoji. Right, we don't want to work for things, we want that instant shot of dopamine.
Speaker 1:But the truth is, the things in life that you really crave in life, the things that you want most in life, they take the most work in life. They take the most sacrifice in life. They take the most sacrifice in life. Look at that little peanut you're holding right now. You got to wait nine months just to open that shell. You know what I mean. That takes some time right there, and then you have a whole future, the rest of your life, ahead of you, full of heartache and sacrifice, but joy and excitement they all get mixed into one. So I feel like that little anchovy you're sitting with right there, that little sweet, did you just call her stinky again?
Speaker 1:Well, I'm just saying I was downwind of a heater a little while ago. That's all I'm saying. But the point I'm making here is that the things that we cherish most, the things that we enjoy, that we love, that we look forward to, that, we hope to have, that we want to enjoy, to appreciate, they come with a lot of sacrifice, they come with a lot of heartache, and I'm saying all this to connect it to a business. And as we seek instant gratification, I feel like there's some things that have happened in this world over the past and I'm sure they've been going on forever, been going on forever, but over the past 10 years, I think, with social media and how quickly we can achieve and attain things, something fundamentally has changed in our wiring where we need things. Now we live in a society with zero patience, like it needs to happen now or I'm over it, and then when we achieve things, when we reach things, we often just forget about those things and disregard things. What are you smiling at over there?
Speaker 2:Oh, I was just thinking about that lady that was behind me at the light there you go.
Speaker 1:There's an analogy for you.
Speaker 2:Literally, I was waiting at a light, waiting to turn. It was a green light and I'm waiting for the green arrow to turn onto my work road, which I go to every day multiple times. I know how the light works. And I looked down at my hand, at a hive on my hand, for less than three seconds, not even kidding Looked down at my hand, checked on the hive and literally this lady beeped at me and I, like, whipped my head around and I looked at her and if I have any sort of gratification, is that the word I'm looking for?
Speaker 1:I'm not sure, keep going.
Speaker 2:I enjoy being petty. Yes, I enjoy being petty. Well, I'm glad you're here to do the best here. If you want to beep at me, I'm going to show you petty. I was certain to wait 10 seconds before making my turn after she beeped at me, and then the speed limit on my road was 25 and I made sure to go 23. Okay, okay, the motto to my life is F-A-F-fo, and I will be certain to show you the slogan of my life I feel, like around and find out if I was just hovering over this situation, like looking in the sunroof.
Speaker 1:You're looking at the hive, she beeps the horn, you look in the in the mirror and then you give her, her the glazed stare of death. You prolong the movement of the car.
Speaker 1:And in my mind, I see and hear you, you look at the lady and then all I can envision is like the song from Lizzo hits. That's like I throw my hair back and check my nails. What's that song? What are those lyrics? I play this song all the time when we're DJing Hair tossed, check my nails Little, little, little little. Feel good as hell. That's it Instantly. You went from. Instead of just moving along through traffic, let me just toss my hair back, let me check my nails. I'm feeling good as hell. I'm going to take my sweet ass time and you're going to be late for whatever it is you're beeping for.
Speaker 1:That's what I envisioned right there? Not really. I throw my hair, check my nails, something like that. I don't know.
Speaker 2:I'm feeling good as hell, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2:I was coming back from lunch and I, literally you, were feeling good as hell I was, and I was just, you know, going back from lunch and this lady behind me who was like impatient I'm going to tell you this right now the light had changed that, even if I was paying attention, I didn't have enough time to take my foot off the brake and hit the gas before she beeped at me my Weflexes I have no Weflexes I was like, and I looked up and she's throwing her hands in the air and I was like man, pull into my parking lot. I swear to God, I will pull you out of this car and dust the brakes off your four eyes. That's how I'm feeling, petty, let's get back to the point we were making here.
Speaker 1:That's just a classic example of people lacking patience. Yeah.
Speaker 2:Everybody wants things right now. Give me a second.
Speaker 1:Right freaking now? Let me try. I think, with social media and all these things, things happening instantly. Nobody writes letters, no more. You know what I'm saying. Things need to happen now. I ain't got time to pick up the phone. I'm going to text your ass. I don't have time for this. People want things now.
Speaker 1:Another thing that's happened is, over the past few years, everybody owns a business, everybody's an entrepreneur. There's so many people that are just like what do you do? I'm an entrepreneur, that's what I do. I'm an entrepreneur, I own this, I start that, I do this. You know what I mean? I run businesses.
Speaker 1:I feel like there was a big rise in that over COVID stuff, but a lot of things that you see out there are like social media influences, right. There's so many people that are like I'm an influencer, I'm a life coach, like those things happened and they've gone. Just triple down on those, all right. So everybody owns their own business, everybody's an entrepreneur, they're a life coach, they're a, they're an influencer, and everything has to happen instantly. That's something that I feel like we're just so surrounded by. When I was growing up, there was only a handful of people that I feel like that I knew that were business owners. You know what I'm saying. Now, everybody in your circle owns a business, right? Yeah, of some sort. So it's just so much, just crazy to me how that is just one of the things that seems to be so common right now.
Speaker 1:So, as we're talking about these the quest for instant gratification of being a business owner what I'm making for a connection here is those two things don't happen. They don't go together. You can have instant gratification in starting a business, but instant gratification isn't going to keep you in business, because you have to play the long game. Patience, like a fortune cookie, is a virtue, right? We've been hearing that in fortune cookies for a frigging entire life. Right, that's like the most popular fortune cookie ever written. But patience attracts happiness. It brings near that, which is far. So, when we're talking about that long ass road that has that big ass goal at the end of it, you need to be patient and you can't sit on your hands and do nothing about it, but you need to possess a little patience.
Speaker 1:Instant gratification, I think, is like the antichrist to being a small business owner. And I'm saying all these things and I'm talking about them because, as I said, to open the show when you hit a milestone, when you're on one of these long ass, windy, bumpy, unpaved roads that possesses all kinds of sacrifice and heartache and hard work. There's going to come times when you're going to see beautiful things, you're going to find beautiful scenery, you're going to be able to have to pull over and smell the roses, count the stars, kiss the frog and say, hey, cinderella. And that's where we're at right now. Did I at all make anything clear, or did I just make a mud pie?
Speaker 2:Sounds pretty crystal clear to me. Okay, good as clear as a mud pie.
Speaker 1:Perfect. What I'm saying here, folks, is that when you set your goals on something and it takes forever to get to those goals, if you don't stop and celebrate the small victories, if you don't stop and recognize some of those achievements, you will get just swallowed up by how long that road is. I say all this jibba jabba to let y'all know, as of right now, the month of November 2024, loud Proud American has been in business for five whole years. I said years.
Speaker 2:Did you hear me Nice job? I sure did. Do you know why I?
Speaker 1:said years. Did you hear me drool? I sure did. Do you know why I said years? No, why yeah, because I was changing my voice the nutty professor, my voice because when we achieve something, oh, we gotta celebrate. Oh, baby, we did it. Snubs and gloves, oh my, you've heard this voice, you've heard it on the podcast, but right now, in this awkward arrangement, we have the living room.
Speaker 2:You got to see my face while I do it. The nutty professor was actually on the other day.
Speaker 1:Get out of here ready.
Speaker 2:I'm not even kidding, I was scrolling through. Look at him.
Speaker 1:Look at him with his little bicep. Oh, look at him.
Speaker 2:Oh, oh, look at him.
Speaker 1:Oh, he's so cute. We did it.
Speaker 2:We did it, sugar Britches, five whole years. We sure did Five whole years. You want to know what's funny is? I actually knew that. You knew what that we had been in business for five years Want to know why.
Speaker 1:Why Is it a look back of some sort?
Speaker 2:No, I started my job at the hospital at the exact same time, november 1st.
Speaker 1:There you go.
Speaker 2:Same time we opened the business.
Speaker 1:That's true. So, yeah, I already knew that it's crazy, because if I go back to 2019, when we started this whole little journey that we're on, you't picture five years you know what I mean.
Speaker 1:Like we're writing it all out there and you can't picture five years. You can't be like you know, like it's so hard, like you have these goals and you have that, that long road that you put out there and that kind of end, all be all like the goal that you set for yourself. But even though you can imagine those things, you can envision those things, it's still really hard to feel five years.
Speaker 2:It's crazy Because, if you think about it five years ago, like when you were at the dealership, we never talked about being parents ever, because I didn't want to be like a single mom, like because not that I really would be, but you were just working a lot, and all that kind of stuff and the amount of stuff that's changed in five years, like not only just like you starting the business and learning and growing through the business, but like us as a whole, like we have grown and learned and done so much in those last five years and now I added this one to the mix in that five years we've, uh, we've, gone through hell in five years.
Speaker 1:I mean, let's, let's be honest, we've, we've gone through dumpster fire yeah, it uh. I mean, the whole country fell apart in this five years that we've been doing this you think about how difficult it is to be in business and you think about the fact that we managed a pandemic. You know we went, we made it through, uh, through that. I'm not going to list all the things, but like, I mean, we both made it through uh, through that. I'm not gonna list all the things, but like.
Speaker 1:I mean, we both made it through, neither one of us having a job if you are a day one listener and you've heard our story, then you know where we're headed. If you haven't, then go back and listen. I mean we started this podcast in july 2020, so the business was still really fresh, right and um we've talked about like in the beginning. It kind of goes through our life, gives you like kind of my life story and it leads up to betting on ourselves and starting this business on you know, starting this brand.
Speaker 2:Before that, we were living the life Like we were traveling, we were doing whatever we wanted, whatever the hell we wanted to do, I mean we didn't have as much time to do it, but when we made time we had the finances to do it.
Speaker 1:We had reached the biggest levels of career success that either one of us had had Right. You were running a veterinarian office, right you? Were the front office manager, practice manager for a new vet's office in the Old Port.
Speaker 2:Yep.
Speaker 1:And I had become an owner for a Harley-Davidson dealership and I thought that that was like our life plan.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:We were going to own a Harley dealership. I started off with a small percentage, but my plan, as we're talking about five-year plans, is that at that time I really thought that in 10 years I'd be the majority owner. That's kind of what I said for myself and I just envisioned that that was always going to be the case. And, as you said, when you're thinking about having children, we had the financial means to do it, but not the time to do it.
Speaker 1:And when you're going to achieve those levels of success, I feel like there's a lot of sacrifice that comes with it, and um, we sacrifice time and moments, and memories and opportunities to get to that point, but we were there, yeah and um.
Speaker 1:To sum that whole story up, the majority owner for the business that I worked for, the harley dealership that I was at. He didn't want to work anymore. He had an opportunity to sell the business and retire. That's what he chose to do. I was not in a position to buy that. I didn't have that kind of capital and at the same time the vet's office decided to downsize.
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm Yep.
Speaker 1:See ya, we were both unemployed. Yep, same time. Unemployed, yeah, same time. I mean, if you think about it, in September we were riding high. We actually flew out to Nashville, tennessee.
Speaker 2:We were at a.
Speaker 1:Harley Davidson convention with the other owner and his wife now, and we were talking about multi-million dollar building deals to expand the dealership to make a new building, and then, weeks later, we are both unemployed.
Speaker 2:Yep, we have no idea how quickly life comes at you.
Speaker 1:It's crazy, crazy to think. But I got to say to you we wouldn't be here with this five-year mark if it wasn't for you, because when you lost your job, like we made the plan okay, we're going to start Loud Pride American, we're going to build this American brand. This is what we're going to do. When you lost your job, I said, all right, I'll stick around here for a while. They offered me $120,000 to be a sales manager at this new dealership basically. You said don't do it, mm-hmm, yeah, it's not what you and you said don't do it yeah.
Speaker 2:Don't. It's not what you want to do. It's not going to make you happy. You're going to be miserable watching all of your friends and family basically be walked to the door, and it wasn't going to be good for your mental health. It wasn't going to be good for our relationship.
Speaker 1:So with all that said, I mean we walked away from you know, financial security and all these things, and decided to start the business and we were both unemployed you quickly.