On The Bright Side…

What has been keeping me up? Nothing. I still suffer from insomnia. I’m still sleeping two to four hours. However, I’m not sure why? 

Today I discuss the role social media and the news have on people. How do they contribute to hate, segregation and violence? What happens when you step AWAY from social media and interact with people, in person? What do you experience? What do you see when you are out in the real world? Are people really as hateful as the media portrays? Not from what I notice? I see good, kind, helpful people. 

I also talk about what you find when you’re looking? Meaning, if you seek out chaos and segregation, you will find it. However, if you seek out positivity and happiness, suddenly, it appears. 

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Hello and welcome to another episode of the Ramblings of an Insomniac. I am Courtney. Good morning, good afternoon, and good evening to you all. I don't know if this podcast is gonna work out the best. Um I am actually on a pretty darn busy area. I am very, very winded. I have been walking like up a boatload of hills. Um and I already did this once today, but I'm getting in shape and it's a lovely morning, and it prompted me to do a podcast. Um because, well, first of all, welcome. Welcome, welcome, welcome everybody. Whether you've been here since the get-go or this is your first time around, I welcome you. Hello, top of the afternoon to you, or whatever the case may be. Uh full disclosure. If you're not catching on, I used to have an intro and an outro. It was quite lovely. If you listen to my earlier podcasts, you will see I have an intro and an outro. It's quite groovy, it got all buggered up and everything. Anyway, um, so I have to fix that. So there's no intro and outro, and there hasn't been for a while. Uh, and also I talk into my iPhone. Um, you hear me panting and wheezing, and you hear all kinds of things in the background. I am not a high-quality top-notch podcast. Um, I'm just talking into my phone, telling you things that are keeping me up. Things that prevent me from counting cute little baby sheep. Um, and sometimes it's politics, sometimes it is family, sometimes it's relationships, sometimes it's just anxiety and um things I'm you know worried about. Sometimes it's work, it's all types of things. I get quite heated sometimes, I cry sometimes, I may offend you. I'm an equal opportunity offensive person. I uh it doesn't matter what race you are, political background, political affiliation, what background you have, um if I disagree with you, if I think something you said is wrong, um, I have an opinion about it, I will say it. Um I am not racist, I am not prejudiced, I am not a Nazi, I am not insert all of the words that people have tried to call me here. Um I'm not perfect. I will agree on that. Certainly, perfection is not something that I possess, um, nor do I want to, because how boring to be per not well, there's no such thing as perfection unless I guess you say the universe or God or whatever deity, entity, thing you believe in. Um, but this is not a perfect podcast, I'm not a perfect person, and I just kind of walk it out with everybody as I go about life. You know, I talk it out, talk it out, talk it out, and then I do that. There's random bursts of singing. Um and sometimes you will hear me panting. No, this is not a porn. I am just apparently out of shape. I thought I was in it's not that I'm out of shape. I'm walking up some hills, you guys. I'm in a neighborhood that thinks that hills are amazing. Um, that's okay. I'm from an area that also thinks that hills, they call it little San Francisco, and it also was a uh had a lot of hills. Um, so that's okay. This gets me in shape. Work on my glutes. I need my butt to get tighter. I need this jiggling. God, you know you're getting out of shape if you're wiggling, you know. And I have some wiggles, and not the cute kind that you sing, you know. The wiggles. Are they even still doing their things? The wiggle. I think we have like wiggles 2.5 or something like that. God, I wish I would have cashed in on all that stuff, like Miss Rachel and uh the wiggles. Man, there's a lot of things, right? We look back and we're like, dang, I thought of those things and I didn't do it. That's the difference, right? There's the doers and there's the talkers. Um, I'm both. I have I have done, I've did, I've done did, but I've also just talked about dun-doing, you know? I'm a dun-doer and I'm a talker. So it depends on what what mood I am, what's going on in my life, you know. Uh right now, I'm in a great mood. You know why? Do you know why? I'll tell you. First of all, I've been noticing more and more people listening to my podcast, so hats off to you, much appreciated. And also because I have been experiencing a lot of people being so kind. And you know, when you get wrapped up on the internet and your algorithm starts showing you the negative negativity, negativity, and people treating each other like garbage and disagreeing and fighting, and you know, they show a lot of people being racist, and you've given up on the world, and you're like, dang, I'm just oh, I'm tired, you know. I'm so tired of all the negativity, and I start believing that people are bad. I start believing that people are more people are racist than not. Of course, racism exists, but not as much as the media wants you to believe. Of course, hate and bullying exist, but not as much. Sorry, there's gonna be a truck, I'll pause it, hang on. Okay, this is a poor choice of places to go when one is doing a podcast. Um, but there's always gonna be hate and bullying and racism. Gosh dang it, hang on. Dang, I think school just got out. It's busy, but there's always gonna be hate and people that are shitty, and you know, and that's what bothers me is when people are like, well, look, there's this video of this person being racist, therefore everybody's racist. I've done it, I've done it, I've been that person that has done that, so boy, am I not? I'm not speaking because I think I'm perfect. I've done it, I've participated in it. But I am dog sitting and I'm here for quite some time, so I'm getting to know the neighborhood, I'm getting to know the lay of the land, and there are a lot of people from different backgrounds here, a lot of people from that are different races here. And do you want to know what I've noticed? You want to know what has made me so happy? People look up at you and go out of their way to say good morning or good afternoon, good evening, to look you in the eye, to nod their head, to smile. I went into a store the other day and these two women behind the counter happen to be black. I'm only pointing that out because I have been seeing video after video after video of black people saying how much they hate white people, how much white people suck, how terrible, horrible no good white people are. And I'm like, God, I'm getting tired of this. I am tired of the racism. Come on, I know this just and I was seeing more and more of it. But you want to know what I experienced? Two lovely women who were not being fake because they were at their work. It was not, you could tell this is not just them trying to be professional because they're at work and they have to be nice. No, this was genuine kindness, genuine respect for life. I asked her how she was doing. She said, I'm alive and I'm breathing, so God is good, I am blessed. And I went, wow, amen. That is amazing. I am alive, I am breathing, God is good, I am blessed. If only, if only, if only we all had that attitude every day, right? Myself included. And I notice when I read the Bible and I search for the good, who knew you would find the good, you would see the good. When you pull your head out of your own butt, myself included, I'm not saying you as people, I'm saying we, a collective whole. Um, you know, it's like that thing. If you look for a yellow taxi, you're gonna see a yellow taxi. If you look for a zebra, you're gonna see a zebra. So if you look for bad, you're gonna notice the bad. If you seek out the chaos, you're going to see chaos. So if you're seeking out and surrounding yourself with positivity and positive people, well, that's gonna rub off, of course. We all know this. This isn't, I know I'm not telling you anything that you haven't heard. I'm not saying any kind of wise words. I don't think I'm, you know, spewing things that are so wise. I'm just saying, man, for my own self, it's been interesting. God, I finally found a bench and now someone's doing yard work, which is great. Yard work, love it. Love listening to the sound of people doing yard work because that means it's probably a pretty decent day out, which it is. It's just not so great when you're doing a podcast. I mean, neither is me panting on the, you know, on here and sounding like I'm about ready to keel over. That's not so great either, but you know, um, anyway, it was so nice to see that so far where I am, and I'm going to be in this neighborhood for a hunk of time, and I'm walking the dogs a lot. I'm so I'm out, and you kind of notice who's the normal and who's you know what's going on, and you start picking up on that. And people are just friendly. And you know, I I I know it has a lot to do with where the neighborhood is um and what's going on and how much stress people are going through. And you know, God knows there's been times I have been really crabby, but I don't, I'm not a bad person. I'm a I consider myself a good person, a caring person, someone that genuinely wants people to wants to help people. And I have bad days, and you know, I used to get upset when somebody would, you know, if I bumped into somebody with a shopping cart and they were like, you know, I used to be like, damn, what a bitch. And now I'm like, you know, maybe they are a bitch, maybe, who knows? But also maybe they're just having a real bad day, and it's one of those times when they've had such a bad day, and it's like the straw that broke the camel's back, and me bumping into them was just like really, I've had it. God, I can't get away from this noise. Lord, uh, alright. Hang on. Anyway, there's a leaf floor in the background, and I'm in uh an area where there's gonna be a lot of noise, and probably more so than what I'm even going to allow for this podcast, but it's been amazing to see um the good, you know. I I've talked about this before, but there was a kid, I don't know, like 13, I guess, on one side of the road, and there was an older gentleman, I would say honestly between 80 and 85, walking on this like upright walker thing, and he does it every morning. I see him every morning, he's out there, and it takes him some time, but he gets out there and he does it. And there was this kid across the street, and at first I thought he was yelling, because I mean he was yelling, he was screaming only because it was across the street and there was cars going by, so but I thought he was yelling at first something rude because he kind of looked angry, he had like flushed face and stuff, and I felt bad because he wasn't after listening and seeing body language and watching the the gentleman. I you know, I rolled down my window and I was like, um, well, I had my windows down, they were already rolled down, and I could hear them, and the kid did the thumbs up sign, you know, and was smiling, and the other guy was like smiling and and nodding and waving, and I was like, oh, that's so nice. And I thought, how sad that I just immediately assumed this kid was being a punk. Because again, I'm just so used to seeing that that I made an assumption, and I shouldn't have made an assumption, I should have stopped and you know, assessed. But it was nice, it was so nice to say, Oh, and there's a butterfly, a really pretty one. Hi, oh my gosh. Oh hi, okay. He's right near me, and then the dog scared him away. Aww. Where'd you go, Bobs? Aw, he was right near me, and then um the dogs that I have are there he is! Oh that reminds me of my hummingbirds haven't been coming back lately. Um I my bird feeders, I neglected them for a while, and they got icky, and the hummingbirds were like, Boo, you clearly don't care about us, and then um so I cleaned them all up and got a new feeder out there, and now I'm waiting. I'm waiting, I miss them. Come back. Come back, please come back. A little Titanic for you. Yeah, uh-huh, you like that? Not only do I do a little dance, I don't know what that uh-uh was. I I don't know what that was. Don't erase that, go backwards. Um do a little dance, and I also do a little uh singing, a little, little this, little that, you know, it's just uh it's like the Fred Meyer of podcasts. Get a little one-stop shop here, you know? Oh no, I'm in the muck. Ah oh no. Oh goodness. Uh I need four-wheel drive. Four-wheel drive, Inspector Gadget. Did-da-d-d-d-d-do, go, go, gadget. Uh, what are they called? Stilts. Okay, guys, no. Oh, good gravy. Anyway, anywho. So uh what's been on my mind though? Side note, I just wanted to say I'm happy to hear and see happiness and positivity and people that like each other and people that are not racist and are not bigots and are not horrible people looking for a brawl. You know? There are a lot of people that are just really bored, like my prank caller, bored, called the other day, and I'm like, really? How long? I asked them, I'm like, how how long are we doing this? Like, is this a long-term thing? What's your end game? What are we what are we trying to achieve when you prank call over and over? Like, I get doing it once or twice, hee hee, tee hee, he. I used to do that. I was a little fucking asshole when I was a kid, and you know, I'm a generation Xer. We invented prank phone calling. It was our shtick, and um, you know, and karma's a bitch, but I didn't do this. This is not what I did. I called one time, said something really dumb, like, is your refrigerator running? You better go catch it, you know, dumb shit like that. But I didn't like call people repeatedly over and over and harass them. That's harassment, not prank phone calls anymore. So these people that are harassing me, which I feel strongly, are my ex-coworkers' children and her her family, um, and then one of my other ex-coworkers, because um, anyway, uh, I I think that's who it is. I don't know, so I can't say. Um, it's like how bored are you? Can you just be happy? Like, what is your end game? What exactly is your goal here? Don't you have like work to do? Don't you need to be in school? Shouldn't you be in school? Shouldn't you be studying? Shouldn't you be, I don't know, like doing anything more productive. So it's good when you it was really nice though, because I had uh posted something about that and I was like, how bored does someone have to be? Maybe they miss me, maybe they just miss me a lot. And one of my customers is like, I can confirm that I do. So they miss me. My customers miss me, which is nice. I mean, I've they've reached out to me, and I just think it's childish um when you have let someone go to continue to harass them. It's like you let me go. So why do you and I don't know if it's them. I don't know. Maybe it's not, I don't know for sure. Um, but you know, I'm trying to be living my life. I heard this song today and it said, I'm trying to um I'm trying to live, not make a living. No. Ooh, I was gonna quote something, and I guess if I'm gonna quote it, I should know what the fuck I'm talking about, right? I would rather build a life than make a living. That's what it is. I'd rather build a life than make a living. And I'm like, amen. That's pretty. I mean, don't get me wrong, I want to make a living too. You know, both would be awesome, but I see what they're saying. You know, you want happiness, you want to be with your family and have quality time. You want quality over quantity, you want quality over money, you'd rather have health, happiness, you know, your family, support, friends, all of that um is more important than money. Now, don't get me wrong, I agree with Daniel Tosh. They say money can't buy you happiness. Have you ever ridden a jet ski? But it is nice. I get what he's saying, and I I agree. Um, plus, you can have both. You absolutely can have both. You can be a successful person that has earned it and worked their butts off to achieve that. I've never understood why people begrudge. That's just jealousy. You shouldn't begrudge someone reaping from their hard work. Do you want a farmer to not, you know, gain anything from his hard work? You know, when you're going to work and you're working your butt off, do you not get a paycheck? You get something from it. You know, when we work, we get something. And so people just assume that billionaires just started out billionaires. And maybe someone won the lottery and they, you know, but they maybe weren't a billionaire before that. They weren't a billionaire, probably, I'm assuming they weren't a billionaire before they won the lottery. Taylor Swift, um, it sounds like they she came from some money. I don't think she was poor, but you know, as much as I can't stand her, she earned it. Donald Trump earned it. He's a hard worker, he earned it. And then maybe they get to a point where now other people are working for them and they retire. So what? If you were a billionaire, I'm 99.9% sure you're not going to give every single penny of it away. I'm assuming you would get yourself something pretty, you know? So I hate it when people mistake there's jealousy. Don't be jealous. Don't begrudge somebody. Oh, tax the rich, tax the rich. They're already being taxed, they're having the crap taxed out of them. Back off, man. You're not gonna feel the same when you're the one going through it. I can guarantee you. If you're telling me money can't buy you happiness, well, it can buy me some happiness. You can buy me with money, you can't buy me with money. Whoa, I'm not a whore. You can't buy me uh with money. Uh, I'm just saying it I think it helps. It helps to be able to because you need money to pay your bills, you need money to have a roof over your head, you need money to have a you know, a car or some type, or pay for bus fare, have you know transportation and heat and all of that. So I I don't care what people say. And I get the saying, I understand that again, support, family, health is very important. I too feel that that's more important by far, by far. But money ain't bad. You know what I'm saying? Anyway, I just wanted to say what's keeping me up. I don't know, I'm sleeping a little bit better, not a lot, but when I am okay, here's the thing. I'm not sleeping any more hours, I'm still only getting three to four hours of sleep, but I'm sleeping harder. I'm sleeping, I'm actually like, I think, going into the REM state. Um so because things are knock on wood, they've been okay. Um, again, I'm happy with my um life, and so I think when you're happy, of course, you're gonna sleep better, right? I mean, that's a duh, right? I'm telling you a lot of things that are very common sense, I realize. I'm not thinking that I'm some wise Buddha, but anyway, I'm very, very grateful that people are tuning in. I'm so happy that people have been listening. I welcome everybody. Thank you, thank you, from the bottom of my heart, honestly. This was just a quick little podcast saying, hey, doing a little dance for you for the day. Why do I keep going? I don't know why I am doing that. We're gonna we're gonna axe the dance. We're not gonna put that in there. Yeah, we won't, we won't put that in there. We're gonna just just imagine me doing the wave, wave, woo, with a bunch of people, and um just saying hello, welcome. I appreciate you. Thanks for uh listening, even though I am a hot mess, um, and I do not have my shit together in any way, shape, or form. And I can get a little crazy sometimes, but yet you still tune in. Which I again I don't know how to say thank you any more than saying thank you. So with that, remember. to control what you can let go of the rest and uh until next time