Stop Drinking Podcast by Soberclear

How to socialize without alcohol (easiest method)

• Leon Sylvester

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Speaker 1:

Welcome to the Stop Drinking Podcast, where we help you make stopping drinking a simple, logical and easy decision. We help you with tips, tools and strategies to start living your best life when alcohol-free. If you want to learn more about stop drinking coaching, then head over to wwwsoberclearcom. Today I'm going to show you how you can socialize without drinking alcohol but, most importantly, meet better people. And that sounds so harsh and judgmental, but you'll see what I mean. It's not from a place of judgment If we've not met yet.

Speaker 1:

My name is Leon Sylvester. I'm the founder of Soberclearcom. I haven't drank for seven years after a decade of struggling, and I now run a coaching company that helps business owners and professionals stop drinking alcohol with a totally new method. It's scientifically validated. It works in as little as 24 hours not always, but if you want information on that, you can either go to SoberClearcom or, if you click the link down below, you can access a free video training that shows you how the method works and how you can get control of your drinking. You'll just click the link below, put in your name and email address and then a new video will start. But the stuff that I'm going to teach you in this video today I've used in my own life to literally meet Olympic athletes, to meet people with $100 million companies, to meet people with YouTube channels with millions of subscribers. So when I say better, I don't necessarily mean that they are better people. That's an arbitrary term.

Speaker 1:

But when I drank alcohol I had people who had shared mutual goals of drinking alcohol. Yeah sure, maybe so often I'd find somebody that drinks alcohol and then also does a bit of training. Every so often I'd make friends with somebody who has a shared mutual interest and doesn't drink. But when I was drinking alcohol my primary goal in life was almost to drink. That was the main focus. So when I met people who drank we'd connect pretty damn fast and even if we didn't really share that much in common, once we got a few drinks in us we'd find some common ground. But I've just had a friend come to stay with me. He came to stay, him and his wife, for three days, came for the weekend, had an amazing time. But after he left I thought for a second. I thought you know what? I would never have met this person when I drank alcohol. I'm not going to names drop and do any of that stuff, because I just find it weird, but this was somebody who, in a way, I used to look up to and now we've become friends. Long story short is, I used to look up to him because I followed his exercise program even when I drank, and now this person has become my friend. But the reason why he's become my friend is all built on a foundation for me of not drinking alcohol.

Speaker 1:

So I'm going to give you a bit of a weird take on this whole situation of socializing without alcohol. I'm not going to teach you some weird technique of like remembering people's names. Go and read how to Win Friends and Influence People. That book seriously changed my life. But I'm going to give you a different take on this whole thing of socializing without alcohol and how you can meet new I say better quality people. What I'm saying is people who are more in alignment with the goals that you've got in your life. I but to tell you this, I've kind of got to go back to when I just stopped drinking. So I've got to go back seven years ago, when I stopped drinking alcohol.

Speaker 1:

I had a mentor. This was a business mentor, and what this mentor said to me is the first thing you've got to do is you've got to take full responsibility for your life, where you are in your life right now. And at that time I just destroyed my entire life because of drinking. I ran out of money, I was overweight, just everything had gone to. But the mentor basically said Leon, you got to look at your life and just take full responsibility. Your life is exactly the way it is because you've designed it this way. And when I heard that, oh, I wanted to cry. I'm not going to lie, it wasn't like a nice thing that he said, but that gave me the power to change things. Anyway, the next thing that he said is who you are right now will never achieve any goal that you've got for yourself. I was thinking what are you talking about? I'll just try, I'll just keep going to the gym and keep doing this and do this with the business, and then things are going to go well. And he said no, it doesn't work like that.

Speaker 1:

He said you need to design the person that you need to become in order to effortlessly achieve the goal. So, for example, if at the time, like, let's say, my goal was to start this YouTube channel, who do I need to become? I need to be somebody who's focused, somebody who isn't afraid to put themselves on the internet. The fear of judgment is gone. I need to be somebody that works hard, that's able to research, that has a skill of making YouTube videos, that can hire somebody to help edit the videos. There was all of these things that I had to become in order to achieve the goal of a YouTube channel.

Speaker 1:

And he would always say that you need to design the person and then step into becoming this person. Why am I telling you all of this? I tell you this because when I stopped drinking alcohol, I had a vision for my life. There was a person I wanted to become because there were goals that I had, and he said you've got to sit down, design the person and then become the person. And what you do is you live your life with this feedback loop. He would say, okay, you've designed the person, live your life and then, at the end of the day, reflect on what steps you've taken in the direction of becoming that person. And he would always call it this positive mental feedback loop.

Speaker 1:

Trust me, we'll get back to alcohol in a second, but this whole thing changed my life in such a big way. It made me build this business right. It made me build this YouTube channel the person who I am when I first stopped drinking alcohol. Compared to who I am today, they wouldn't even recognize each other. Sure, that might sound a little bit weird. Technically I am the same person, but I'm a different character. When I designed the person I had to become the beliefs, the mindset like. Who is this person Once I'd stopped drinking alcohol is. I changed my behavior. I had a vision for my life, started changing my behavior and started moving in this direction.

Speaker 1:

But then something interesting happened. I started attracting people into my life who were in alignment with this person I wanted to become, and my friends ended up becoming very similar to the character who I had to become. So I ended up finding a lot of friends that were doing YouTube right, that were doing content, that were helping people. I ended up finding friends that were into health and fitness and powerlifting and CrossFit and all of this stuff. And as my business grew, I ended up attracting a lot of business people, a lot of successful people, into my program.

Speaker 1:

But why? Why did this happen and why am I even telling you this? See, I am of the belief that we attract into our life who we are. What I mean by this is that if you drink a lot of alcohol and you kind of put that out into the world, then it's very likely that you're going to attract those people back into your life. That's what happened to me. I'm sure you can relate to this. But if you're putting out that vibe, that energy, it's probably going to come back to you, the same way that you might have met people in your life that are just so negative and pessimistic. Nothing's ever right and it's almost like these people just keep attracting bad luck. And what I found in my experience is when I started changing who I was, changing my behavior, changing the way that I viewed myself, and started taking action, it was weird. It was like the right people just started coming into my life.

Speaker 1:

So, when it comes to socializing without alcohol, it's not just about not drinking. It's not just about, I don't know, learning some technique to like talk to a stranger in a networking event. No, the most important thing you can do when it comes to socializing without alcohol is improving you as a person. It's defining your goals, your dreams, the things that you want in your life. It's designing the character, designing the person you need to become and just living in alignment with that, and I promise you that's when you'll start making progress.

Speaker 1:

That's when, a year from now, you look back at your life and you're like, oh, I'm so different. Look at me, I'm back in shape, I'm making progress in my career. My family life is better than ever and what happened to me is the people who I had a good relationship with that I drank with. These relationships just started disappearing, but they were replaced with people who were more in alignment with the life I wanted to live. So when I say better, you know that's kind of binary, right? People aren't good or bad. There's just people out there that are more in alignment with the character I want to become.

Speaker 1:

So if you want to socialize without drinking alcohol, it's an adjustment and you might go through a bit of a lonely period. You might realize, okay, well, a lot of these people in my life they're not really my friends and outside of drinking, I've got nothing in common with them. It's not uncommon for people to break up with long-term relationships, sometimes get divorced after they stop drinking. All sorts of things happen.

Speaker 1:

But the most important thing you can do is number one is not drink, because that's the foundation of everything. And then number two is start designing the character you want to become, define the goals and then move in that direction. And it's like magic and I'm not going to lie, it does sound a little bit like pseudoscience, but it works for me. So all I do on this channel is share what's worked for me, share what's worked with the clients I've helped. So if you want to attract better people into your life, have a better social life and a better network and a better romantic relationship, whatever it may be, the foundation is to number one, not drink alcohol. And then, number two get better. Thanks for checking out the Stop Drinking Podcast by Sober Clear. If you want to learn more about how we work with people to help them stop drinking effortlessly, then make sure to visit wwwsoberclearcom.

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Leon Sylvester

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